i dont think I want to date anyone until im out of high school

I’m Bisexual and Ashamed

hello, this is my coming out story and why im ashamed of who I am. 

So, i think i was in fourth grade when i was questioning weather or not I liked girls. Everytime i saw a girl at the store or someone famous i thought was cute i always yelled at myself and was like “No I dont think shes cute I just like her shorts” stuff like that, trying to convince myself that I was straight. 

It wasnt until the summer between 5th and 6th grade that I sorta started to accept it. I have a best friend and she has a sister, her sister is pan and when I met her she was with a girl. Firstly, she was fucking hot, and secondly I looked up to her because she was so open about her sexuality. Beforehand I didnt know any LGBTQ+ people. 

In sixth grade I got my first “boyfriend” I didnt totally accept my sexuality yet, or better yet I didnt know the term “Bisexual” so the fact that I had a boyfriend made me think that “Well since I like a guy I cant possibly like girls” then when I heard the term “Bi” I was like ooohhhh so you can like both genders, cool! and from there I accepted it, and boom! im out to myself. 

Then came seventh grade, I really liked this girl. I became friends with her and we started dating. But heres the catch, She was popluar, im not. She decided it would be a good idea to tell everyone we were dating, even though I was only out to my best friend and my sister. 

Shit hit the fan from here. there was very little amount of people who accepted us… well, more like her. I had to explain to every single person in my grade that I was Bi. Since she was popluar she didnt get half as much backlash, barely any for that matter. For a good two days straight I couldnt walk down the hall without someone calling me a name. I broke up with her thinking it would make things better… spoiler alert, it didnt work. 

I was so hurt by what that girl did. she outed me, and if you know what thats like, you know how much it hurts. I was bullied by these three guys spificly. they were just so hurtful. I begged my mom to stay home so I could avoid it. I wasnt out to her yet so I never told her why I didnt want to go to school.

half way through 7th grade I finally told my mom, she told me “Theres no such thing as Bisexuality, youre either gay or straight” that hurt me so much. Not only did she tell me my sexuality wasnt a thing she also outed me to so many people I wanted to tell myself. She told my grandma, my aunt, my uncle, and everytime she told someone she put quotations around bi. 

Its been around 3 years since i was outed, Im 16 now, going into junior year and its still not easy. I thought that when I went to high school itd get better. It didnt. the Bulling got so bad that I went to the princaple to try and get them to stop. The princaple told me he couldnt do anything because he “didnt see a problem” and instead he gave me a detiton for “wasting my time” and “Not going to class” which was just such an eye opener for me. 

yes its 2017 but in my case, LGBTQ+ still isnt acceptable, it could be because I live in a small town but that shouldnt change the fact that people are still too afraid to come out, and for a good reason. I was never ready to come out. I was outed, and I was bullied about it since I was 12, when i was still figuing out exactly everything. From being called such bad named and being invalidated by my family, you can understand why I feel like something is wrong with me and why I try to cover it up. to this day I still avoid liking girls as best I can. everytime I do fall for a girl I emeditly get so anxious and worried that she will to get made fun of or that Ill get made fun of more. I dont know how to end this other than I needed to get it out and Im sorry for anyone who had bad coming out experiences.  The internet and this platform has helped me alot, and I just wanted to share my story.

anonymous asked:

omg have you heard the song play me that song by brantley gilbert?? even if you dont like country music just look at the lyrics and cant you totally imagine like maybe the girl niall wrote this town about, he is close friends with and a similar thing that happens in play me that song happens with them. im trying to word this so it makes sense but idk if im doing a very good job lol. regardless, i need someone to write that hahaha

Play Me That Song

I was always so flustered whenever she called.  Which made no sense whatsoever.  We’d known each other since we were in diapers.  We used to take baths together.  We laid in cribs together.  We walked to and home from school together.  We had sleepovers.  We went to every major school function together.  I couldn’t remember anything huge that ever happened to me without her being there.  

I don’t think I knew what it felt like to not be in love with her.  I spent my nights as a teenager wondering what it would feel like to touch her, hold her, kiss her.  But by the time I got up the nerve to say something, I’d become a member of One Direction.  I missed my shot, mainly because I didn’t want to say something when my life was such a whirlwind of activity.  I couldn’t give her the kind of attention she deserved back then.

But I was almost 24 years old now.  And things had calmed down.  I was able to breathe.  I was able to sit back and enjoy the success I’d worked so hard for.  As happy as I was for what I’d accomplished, there was always something missing.

I tried so hard to move on from it.  I dated other girls.  But nothing ever panned out.  Everything always came back to her.

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anonymous asked:

Idea for a jikook fic: (really typical but cute) • Jimin is the new nerd/shy boy at school • Everyone thinks he's stunning cause he is..Ofc(Purple/silver hair era, because he kind of looks like a prince) • Jungkookie is a bad boy at the same age as Jimin. (You never walk alone hair era because it's messy) • Jungkook finds Jimin annoying because he is stunning and smart BUT poor • Jungkook on the other hand is a rich kid with a lot of problems at home • Jimin finds out Jungkook's secrets • LOVE

Okay so this has been sitting in my inbox for months now and I’ve just had 0 motivation to write a fanfic. not just off this prompt, because i love it. but a prompt in general. so instead i’m going to do headcanons. I hope that’s okay! 

(note: this is amercan school bc i’m too lazy to look up details on korean school oops)

~ Jimin just moved from Busan to Seoul. He was pretty out of his comfort zone at his new school. He had dyed his hair silver because he liked it, not so that he stood out. but that’s all that happened - was him standing out. 

~The first person that he met was Taehyung, who ended up being his best friend and self-proclaimed soulmate. They had met when Jimin had been trying to find his first period and had accidentally tripped over Tae’s leg. 

~Jimin got dubbed as the shy new boy by almost the entire student population. It wasn’t even a small school, yet they all knew him. 

~Some called him a nerd because he tried to join the debate club, but he only joined because tae was too scared to be in the club by himself after he had accidentally pissed off the club leader. 

~He first saw jungkook after school, jungkook was leaning against the school wall with a group of his friends (basically 97 line) and he was laughing and jimin lowkey fell in love with his smile. 

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kunikida w/tattoos

right. due to some of the posts ive been seeing (mostly by @kunikidazai, @mr-reblogbutton and @thelampisaflashlight) i decided to chip in and add a few of my own hc’s about good ol’ kuni and his tattoos


☆ as someone who’s been inked, it doesn’t hurt as much as a lot of people would think, but it’s still. irritating. like several thousand bee stings but without the poison and anxiety.

☆ now, kunikida? super high pain tolerance. tattoos would be a walk in the park for him compared to what he’s grown up with

☆ (this guy used to get into fights as a kid and canonically hates authority figures. my guy has to have some sort of tolerance for pain if he got away with constantly being in fights)

☆ you wanna tell a tiny, delinquent kunikida doppo he won’t get a job if he gets a tattoo? sure. but you can bet your entire bank account and your ass that he’s going to get the biggest, most easily hidden tattoos he can find and hold down a job, just to tell you that you were wrong

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Receipts

So, here’s my receipts post for kob featuring his cronies. Really, the big one for all of them is the pedo apologizing bullshit, because, tbh, I haven’t interacted with any of them in a memorable way, so I’d really have to dig through stuff if I wanted to find posts the others have responded to in their own words. For the most part, they just agree with kob and all his shitty opinions and sit in his back pocket whenever he has to pull the “I have minority friends” trap card out. As though minorities can’t also be toxic to each other (see; the current state of the queer community)

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boyfriend!daehwi

a/n; i felt bad not giving magumagu a scenario of his own,, so here is an au,,,,,this is also gonna be a lil lengthy so grab your snacks and prepare yourself for the fluffiest bf au you will ever read and also i might be swerving for him thanks cheryl and im sorry jihoon

Originally posted by hitoritabi


  • a totally last minute thing i suppose
  • i wanted to write to just isolate myself from reality
  • so ok enough deep shit w zechu
  • leggo
  • ok so
  • you’re in the same school as daehwi since like?? middle school or something
  • and ya’ll weren’t close like him and somi ukno
  • but still friends!!
  • ngl when you guys were about to choose high schools your heart decided that it was a good time to have a crush on him
  • i mean
  • just look at him

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anonymous asked:

Can you do a headcannon where MC wants to go to prom, but is made fun of my other students for going with an older person? (Plus saeran too if you don't mind)

HIGH SCHOOL! HIGH SCHOOL! HIGH SCHOOL!

fun fact: i fell off the bed while writing this :)

~headcanon requests are closed for now~

Yoosung

  • Yoosung was beyond excited to take MC to prom
  • he even made sure their outfits for the dance matched perfectly
  • and, of course, he took MC out to a fancy dinner before prom
  • Yoosung’s jaw drops when he sees MC
  • “you look…amazing”
  • he wanted to cry? oh my god he’s so lucky?
  • but at dinner, it seemed like something was bothering MC
  • “sweet heart, whats wrong? please cheer up, it’s your senior prom!”
  • he beams at MC and grabs their hands, trying to coax a smile onto their face
  • they look down at the table, taking their hands away from Yoosung
  • “i am happy Yoosung, i just…i cant help but think about what my friends said…”
  • “what did they say?”
  • “they’ve been making fun of me all week for going to prom with someone who isnt even in high school”
  • MC fidgets nervously thinking about they way their “friends” teased them
  • Yoosung is thinking so many things right now he doesn’t even know what to say
  • why would they tease MC like that?
  • how dare they
  • no one was gonna ruin this for them!!
  • NOT ON YOOSUNGS WATCH
  • he gently puts a hand under MC’s chin, tilting their head up a little
  • “if any of your punk friends have an issue with you dating an older man, thats their problem”
  • he kisses them sweetly, feeling their lips curl into a smile
  • “we’ll still have fun together, right?”
  • MC nods happily
  • “right!”
  • and they did have a lot of fun together, especially since they both dance like big nerds

Zen

  • MC made Zen promise he wouldnt look better than them on prom night
  • “i’m good looking, baby, but not even I can outshine your beauty”
  • that statement was confirmed when Zen saw MC on the night of the dance
  • when they were at the prom, Zen noticed a couple strange things
  • first of all, MC seemed really shy
  • they hadnt talked to any of their friends all night
  • secondly, it seemed like all night kids were...staring at them
  • were they talking about them?
  • Zen knew very well how cruel high school kids could be
  • he had his own “mean girl” phase in high school, and had been on the receiving end of that bullshit as well
  • his face started heating up with anger the more he noticed those kids snickering
  • “hey, MC, do you know what the hell their problem is?”
  • “my class mates have been acting like jerks to me since you’re so old, Zen”
  • okay, that just makes no sense
  • wasn’t dating an older man in high school cool?
  • especially one as HOT and FAMOUS as ZEN?!
  • letting his hot headed tendencies get the best of him, Zen grabs MC and drags them to the middle of the dance floor
  • “Zen, what are you-”
  • once him and MC were surrounded by dancing teens, he grabs their waist and pulls them close to him
  • Zen kisses MC there, in the middle of the dance floor
  • for everyone to see
  • he doesnt stop, just tightens his grip on MC’s waist as he deepens the kiss
  • “i bet everyone makes fun of you cause they’re jealous, MC”
  • their face was bright red
  • why does Zen have to be so bold….

Jaehee

  • Jaehee never really had a lot of fun at her senior prom
  • but things were gonna be different for MC
  • she was going to make prom the best night of MC’s life
  • she spent all day getting ready until it was finally time to pick her date up
  • but when MC answered the door
  • they didn’t look like they were ready for prom at all
  • “MC….are you ready to go…?”
  • they laugh nervously and rub the back of their neck
  • “wow Jaehee, you look so awesome. i’m just feeling a little sick”
  • sick? why didnt you say anything earlier? i could have came over and-”
  • Jaehee stops in the middle of her sentence
  • “wait, are we not going to prom…?”
  • MC looks down
  • “um…well…”
  • they glance up at Jaehee for a moment
  • she’s so beautiful
  • MC’s gut starts to twist with guilt when they think about how long Jaehee must have spent getting ready
  • “i’m sorry Jaehee. truthfully, i’m sort of nervous about taking an older girl to prom. all my friends have been bugging me about it”
  • “oh….”
  • Jaehee hates to think that MC’s friends were making fun of them because of her
  • maybe she should just let MC go by themselves…
  • no, no.
  • this was going to be a fun night for Jaehee and MC if it killed her
  • she steps toward MC, hugging them
  • “please let me take you to prom? i know i’m an old lady…”
  • MC starts to smile
  • “…but i really want to take you to the dance. i’ll even help you get ready. please?”
  • they return Jaehee’s hug, squeezing her
  • “okay, Jaehee! we’ll have fun no matter what those jerks say, right?”
  • “right!”
  • in the end MC’s asshole friends ended up being #shookt by how HOT their date was

Jumin

  • “Jumin, can I talk to you about something?”
  • MC and Jumin were having lunch together
  • “of course, my love. absolutely anything”
  • MC smiles a little
  • they knew he would say that
  • “i’m kind of, well, nervous about prom”
  • “nervous? why?”
  • Jumin reaches across the table, holding MC’s hands in his
  • “you have nothing to be nervous about, darling. don’t you know i’m going to take care of everything?”
  • “well, you can’t exactly take care of those jerks in my third period, can you?”
  • Jumin brings his brows together
  • “what do you mean?”
  • MC lets go of Jumins hands, pushing their hair back and sighing
  • “all my friends keep saying i’m bringing a stuffy old man to prom. i just dont want to be made fun of anymore…”
  • Jumin starts to giggle
  • MC’s eyes widen, surprised by his reaction
  • why is he laughing…?
  • “my dear, i promise no one will dare to tease you at the prom. trust me, okay?”
  • “okay, Jumin. i trust you”
  • and of course, who could make fun of the stretch limo Jumin helped MC out of when they arrived at the dance
  • those kids definitely ate their words when they saw what MC and Jumin were wearing
  • i mean, they looked like damn royalty 
  • the fact that Jumin literally towered over every student at the dance helped too
  • everyone was too intimidated to even look at him
  • the gossip went from “have you heard about who MC is bringing to prom?”
  • to “holy shit have you seen who MC brought to prom?!”

707

  • Seven instantly noticed that something was on MC’s mind when he picked them up for a movie date
  • “whats with all the sulking? arent you excited to finally see the Matrix in all its glory? we’ve been waiting forever for them to play it at the theater”
  • “it’s not that, Seven”
  • “well, what is it? you know i’d fight anyone for you”
  • MC giggles a little
  • “yea, sure you will. i’m just thinking about prom”
  • “whatta bout it? upset that we’re gonna make all your friends feel like shit by schooling them with are sweet dance moves?”
  • Seven dabs
  • Seven stop dabbing for one second and keep ur damn hands on the wheel
  • “no, dork. they keep saying i’m bringing an old man to prom”
  • “what?!”
  • Seven looks disgusted
  • “yea, and that you’re a creepy”
  • “okay, that is so messed up. i’m not even old!!”
  • MC starts laughing again
  • “i’ll show those high school punks! i’ll be the youngest, most vibrant kid there!”
  • oh god….
  • on the night of the dance Seven picks MC up in a right red sports car
  • “check out my whip, MC! pretty youthful, right?”
  • they roll their eyes
  • at the dance, Seven wouldnt stop making bad pop culture references
  • “oh, i am SO tweeting about this!”
  • “MC, is this Kesha? I love Kesha”
  • “no, Seven”
  • “well whatever it is, its great”
  • MC had so much fun laughing at Seven that night, they forgot all about their jerky friends
  • as long as MC had Seven, no one else mattered

Saeran

  • Saeran wasnt really good at this prom thing
  • he wasnt fond of crowds or loud music or obnoxious kids
  • but if it’s important to MC, its important to him
  • at first when he noticed people staring at them, he just thought his tendency to feel paranoid was acting up
  • that is, until MC excused themselves to the bathroom
  • for about 10 minutes
  • dammit, he knew something was up
  • he walks to the bathroom, trying to ignore all the stares
  • “MC? is everything okay?”
  • he could hear sniffing
  • “yea…im fine, Saeran. just gimmie a second”
  • “please let me come in. you arent okay”
  • suddenly, the door opens and MC steps out, their eyes puffy
  • “I just wanted to have a fun night with you, but my asshole friends are ruining it”
  • MC rubs their nose
  • “ruining it? how?”
  • “they keep making fun of us, Saeran. i heard some kids call you a creep”
  • Saeran just stares at MC, baffled
  • “they know i can literally break them, right?”
  • MC starts to giggle a little
  • “please dont break anyone. not tonight, at least”
  • Saeran leans toward MC and kisses them
  • “hey, what if we bail, baby? clearly these kids wouldnt know a cute couple if it punched them in the face”
  • “are you sure, Saeran? i know you paid for the tickets and i-”
  • Saeran kisses them again
  • “yes, i’m sure. lets grab some shakes and have a dance part for two at my place.”
  • “sounds better than senior prom with these jerks”
  • Saeran offers MC his arm
  • “well then, shall we?”

THANKS FOR READING I LOVE HIGH SCHOOL I HOPE YOU DO TOO!!!

Joker x Reader Imagine.

yoo this is my first imagine. sorry if it sucks hehe. oh and btw i used ‘homegirl’ and if you dont know what that is, its a girl who’s in a gang.
sorry it’s a bit short. Also , i know griggs isnt a guard at arkham but i like griggs so i put him in here. *Warnings* - light-ish cussing.

—————————————

*YOUR POV*
“Who’s the homegirl” Griggs asked. i looked at him and rolled my eyes
The woman, Amanda had to tell my whole damn story of why im in a crazy house and not a prison.
“Y/N Y/L/N , 19 ,from East Los Angeles. She was an honor student until junior year of high school. She met a boy who hung around a more different crew. they took a liking to each other and ended up dating. she was well liked by the gang members her boyfriend was friends with. they taught her how to fight. 2 years ago she got arrested for assault towards a girl. apparently Y/N was with her friends and her boyfriends ex went to her and started talking bad to her. calling her an ugly bitch, slut .. you get the picture. Y/N didn’t like it so she beat her up pretty bad. dislocated the girls shoulder, broke her nose and her left wrist. Couple days later she had to move here to gotham because her father was in the navy and he got deported here. Yesterday she got arrested for assaulting a boy who was calling her a freak and a whore. she was on top of him and punching him and then she stopped and looked. she got off and started crying and hyperventilating. She’s not all together in the head. Thats why shes here and not at a prison. Earlier we had her tested to see what might have caused that break down and the doctor diagnosed her with Bipolar disorder , depression , schizophrenia and paranoia.” he looks at me in shock. I just smirk at him.
Amanda walks over and whispers to him.

Amanda’s Pov
i walk to griggs and whisper,
“She’s crazy enough to end up here. prison wouldn’t be the best solution. she doesnt know she’s staying here. take her to the lunch area where everyone is right now. give her a little taste of this place before i break the news.” he nods and walks towards her.

your pov

he walks towards me,
“Cmon sweetheart we’re gonna go to the circus and see the crazies. Also known as the lunch room.”
i look at him in confusion..
“why are we going to the lunch room?”
He doesnt answer.
We get there and i see people in straight jackets , cuffed to the tables, its all a nightmare. i sit down in a corner table and wait. some are staring at me but i just ignore it.
Just then around 10 guards walk in and i see a guy in green hair lipstick, really really pale, with tattoos, handcuffed. he looks at me and grins.
‘he’s alright i guess’ i thought to myself
Amanda walks in and i get up. she has clothes in her hands and she hands them to me.
“You’re going to be staying here and given therapy. i dont know for how long but you haven’t been treated for your illnesses so it might take a while.” oh. my. god.
“WHAT?! I HAVE TO STAY HERE ? IM NOT AS CRAZY AS HALF THESE PEOPLE ! I HAVENT TRIED TO KILL ANYONE!! LOOK AT THIS GUY HE WEARS LIPSTICK AND HE HAS GREEN. HAIR.” i point to the guy.
he looks at me with an angered face and growled.
i look at him and say “oh dont take it too hard princess.” he looks at me in disbelief and then chuckled.
i grab the clothes and went to go get changed. i go back to the lunch area and sit in the same area. That guy is still there. his eyes were on me as soon as i walked in and they haven’t left since i sat down. he walks over to me.
“hiya doll,” and grins.
“hi.” i said in a serious tone.
“What is a pretty thing like you doing in a dump like this?”
“ i beat up someone and had a little panic attack or something and i have to stay here so they can put me through therapy.”
i rub my eyes in frustration
“whats that?” he asked.
“whats what?” i asked confused.
“On your wrist. is it a tattoo?” he said in a curious tone.
“oh that. yeah it is.” i said remembering why i got it. feeling sad.
“why the long face doll ?”
*flashback*
“aye, you wanna get a tattoo with me? you’re 18 and it’s legal and i’ve been wanting to get one with you.” oscar asked.
“yeah? like what kind?” i asked a little surprised at his request. never thought he’d be a boyfriend/girlfriend tattoo kinda guy.
“well i know your always there for me through everything. your like my ride or die. so thats what i think we should get on out wrists. Ride or Die.” he says smiling.
“that’s an amazing idea. yeah i get one with you.”
——Tattoo Parlor——
“Okay so on the left wrist?” the tattoo artist asked. “Um yeah.” i said a little nervous. Oscar went first and i saw him tense up a little bit but not a whole lot. now it was my turn. it’s my first tattoo and im scared as shit.
i hear the pen buzzing and it comes in contact with my skin. it stings but it’s bearable. He finally finished and we both looked at our tattoos and kissed.
*back to reality*
a tear trickled down my face.
“hello? anybody home?” he asked clearly annoyed.
“what?” i asked waking up from my daydream.
“why the long face?” he asked.
“Oh um my boyfriend or ex , got the same tattoo as me after my 18th birthday to show how much love there was for each other. he got shot 2 days later and he died.” my eyes started to get watery but i couldnt show weakness infront of this guy. i wipe my tears and look at him.
“So what’s your damage?” i asked with a smirk.
“oh you know blowing up banks and hospitals. im a certified lunatic, im completely bonkers.” he said with a dopey smile.
“i never got your name.”
“oh im y/n.” i said
“y/n , pretty name for a pretty girl.”
“haha thank you. who are you?” i asked.
his non existent eyebrows went up. should i know who he is?
“Im the Joker. but you can call me Mr. J or J.”
im talking to the fucking joker.

Look, i don’t want to start any fights here, but there’s just a few things i’d like to point out about the ShiroxAnyone ships.

First of all, the description of the show itself is “Teenagers transported from Earth become pilots for robotic lions during an intergalactic war.”
Shiro is one of the pilots, meaning Shiro could very well have been 18 when the Galra captured him.
In addition to that, the fandom seems to believe that Shiro either graduated very young or was sent on the Kerberos mission very soon after gratuating, so he’s probably younger than he looks.

Secondly, the Garrison is a military school. If Lance and Hunk are roughly 17/18 when they starts their simulators and battle training im going to assume that the Garrison trains cadets until they’re about 20/21. (If shiro went to kerberos immediately after graduating that puts him at 22 maximum with the year he spent in the empire. If we assume that he did actually graduate early he’d be 21. That gives us a max difference of 4 years, which is pretty reasonable)

Thirdly, Shiro in general is younger than we often portray him as. Especially with the whole “Space Dad” thing we have going. Shiro is a military man. And he JUST escaped being a POW. That shit does things to you. Suddenly he’s dealing with PTSD, the aftermath of his failed mission, plus whatever he went through in the arena (dont tell me that doesn’t haunt him), and he feels responsible for the lives of the other paladins. He doesn’t have the time of freedom to kick back and be a kid. He’s been forced to grow up almost overnight (the stress may have been what caused his hair to go white, who knows). He knows that if he lets his guard down too much someone could die, so he’s on full alert almost 100% of the time.
Sometimes we do see his youth come out in his personality a little bit, like their early training sessions, and some of his interactions with Coran, and when he squabbles with Allura about the gun in ep 11, it was a youthful (almost childish) way to phrase his point.

On the same note, i think we often think of Pidge as being way younger than she is. Yes, Pidge is much smaller than the other paladins, but she’s young and female. She probably has another growth spurt in her before she hits 18. Pidge is a student at the Garrison, meaning she’s likely in the 15-18 age range like the others. Yes, she used a fake identity to get in, but i think someone would notice if a 12 year old was trying to pass for 16, regardless of gender. Pidge is most likely betwewn 15 and 17, which doesn’t put her in the safe grey area for Shiro ships (except on the high end), but she could very well be shipped with the other paladins with no problem.

While im glad to see the fandom taking an active stand against unhealthy relationships, let’s not villify anyone until we have solid numbers.

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. At the end choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.
whoops I just decided it would be fun

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1.Last beverage: coffee
2.Last phone call: uhh…my mom I think?
3.Last text message: my friend
4.Last song you listened to: The Head and the Heart - Rivers and roads
5.Last time you cried: oh man I…I think when I watched Arrow a few days ago. Or was it yesterday? During Arrow, either way.

HAVE YOU EVER:
6.Dated someone twice: nah
7.Been cheated on: not…exactly
8.Kissed someone and regretted it: yes
9.Lost someone special: no
10.Been depressed: I don’t think so?
11.Been drunk and threw up: I was young and rebellious okay
12.THREE FAVORITE COLORS: red, dark deep blue and..mm..turquoise

??

IN THE LAST YEAR, YOU HAVE:
15.Made a new friend: both online and in real life, yes
16.Fallen out of love: no
17.Laughed until you cried: A LOT.
18.Met someone who changed you: my friend I think
19.Found out who your true friends are: I guess in a way.. but not exactly in the last year, no.
20.Found out someone was talking about you: yes.
21.Kissed anyone you follow/follows you: no

GENERAL:
22. How many people do you know in real life that you follow/follows you on tumblr: 3 I think
24.Do you have any pets: two cats and a fishie
25.Do you want to change your name: strangely, I actually like my name:”)
26.What did you do for your last birthday: that was a trainwreck. just me and relatives
27.What time did you wake up today: 9:32 am
28.What were you doing at midnight last night: i was reading a certain explicit haikyuu fic
29.Name something you CANNOT wait for: 2d season of haikyuu, finals to pass
30.Last time you saw your mother: on Saturday
31.What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: maybe stop thinking I am lonely when in reality I’m not 
32.What are you listening to right now: Shinedown - What a shame
33.Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: no
34.What’s getting on your nerves right now: f i n a l s
35.Most visited website: tumbr\twitter? I guess twitter even more so
36.Blood type: I dunno how they are in English.. III+ I think?
37.Nickname: Belka (which is squirrel in russian), and Enot (which is raccoon) :D
38.Relationship Status: nah
39.Zodiac Sign: taurus
40.Pronouns: she/her
41.Elementary: yes
42.High School: yes
43.College: Yes
44.Hair color: dark dark brown
45.Long or short: a bit lower than my chest
46.Height: 158 cm
47.Do you have a crush on someone: no
48.What do you like about yourself: I like making people happy?
49. - dunno what happened here. 
50.Tattoos: Not yet but I want one. Would get soon if I knew WHAT i wanted..
51.Righty or lefty: right
52.First Surgery: i had it
53.First piercing: ears when i was very little so i don’t remember.
54.First best friend: a girl in a kindergarten named Yana.
55.First sport you enjoyed: karate 
56.First vacation: in Kiev with my parents, then slowly moving to the village to grandgrandmother
58.First pair of trainers: i remember the ones my mother made that were black and had colourful balls on it

RIGHT NOW:
59.Eating: about to
60.Drinking: i’ll go for tea
61.I’m about to: I’m supposed to start preparing for my graphics final and make a goddamn boot
62.Listening to: Free osts
63.Waiting for: my doom. finals.
64.Want kids: i guess?
65.Get married: eh I guess
66.Career: Student for now

WHICH IS BETTER:
67.Lips or eyes: eyes
68.Hugs or kisses: depends
69.Shorter or taller: taller
70.Older or younger: hmm a bit older
71.Romantic or spontaneous: spontaneous 
72.Nice stomach or nice arms: ARMS
73.Sensitive or loud: I dunno….science shows I love both
74.Hook-up or relationship: relationship
75.Trouble maker or hesitate: hesitate

HAVE YOU EVER:
76.Kissed a stranger: yes
77.Drank hard liquor: yes
78.Lost glasses/contacts: lost my favourite glasses with dolphins on them. I was a kid i don’t know where they went
79.Sex on first date: depends but probably no
80.Broke someones heart: sadly yeah
81.Had your own heart broken: yes
82.Been arrested: almost..come on i was just having fun in the fountain 
83.Turned someone down: yes
84.Cried when someone died: yes
85.Fallen for a friend: fuck yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86.Yourself: I don’t know..more no than yes but sometimes i do
87.Miracles: nope
88.Love at first sight: not exactly..attraction yes but not quite love
89.Heaven: I’m agnostic
90.Santa Claus: I did.
91.Kiss on first date: if i really like them then why not
92.Angels: dont think so

not tagging but go for it if you want to;)

Girl Meets World needs to run for quite a few seasons

Like, at least until the kids finish High School.

Because I want Riley and Lucas to try dating in Freshman year of high school, and maybe it even goes on for a while, a season or 2 but in the end it doesnt work out. Not because of anything mean or hurtful, just that they are better friends. And as great as they are together, they dont challenge each other the way they need to be.

I want Lucas and Farkle being total bros throughout all the years, because Riley and Maya have each other and the boys should have that friendship too. I want Lucas to beat the crap out of someone for Farkle.Or maybe Lucas is having trouble with a class and Farkle is the one who stays up all night cramming with him for the big test. Farkle being the one to sit Lucas’s ass down and make him apply for colleges, even though his families going through a hard time with money and Lucas doesnt want to be more of a burden. Farkle calling up every contact he has to find a scholarship for Lucas so he can go. Farkle following him to whichever college he chooses because Farkle already knows what he doing with his life, hes taking over his fathers company, his degree is just basically for show. (ATTEMPTING TO JOIN A FRAT LUCAS AND FARKLE BEING MASSIVE DORKY PLEDGES)

Maya becoming more confident in her art, and carrying a sketchbook everywhere. Entering more art competitions and winning them. She has painting of all her friends pinned up around her room.

Mayas mum getting an acting job, but its the lead in a touring play, which means pulling Maya out of school and having to go with her. Riley freaks out and they make a plan to hide Maya so she cant go.

But Corey just puts another bed in Rileys room, and talks to her mum. Maya will stay with them. Corey remembers what its like to see the person you care about most trying to be taken from you. Corey knows that family isnt always blood related. So Corey takes Maya in, no hesitation, because she is his other daughter as much as she is Rileys sisters. Because he got to keep Shawn, so Riley should get to keep Maya.

Maybe Maya going off the rails a bit when she gets to high school, (see Shawn in BMW) since everyone thinks shes a no good kid anyway, she may as well act like it. She doesnt know where she fits in here, amongst all these cliques, especially when her friends seem to have somewhere so easily. Maya doesnt want to be alone, and its raining and Maya has a cigarette, and then Riley is screaming at her and Maya is screaming back and Riley is clutching Mayas face and telling her she matters because Riley says so and nothing else matters except that. And then Maya is crying and clutching at Riley, and as long as they have each other theyll be ok.

I want Farkle to gain more confidence as he grows up, but never lose that cocky edge he has for being rich and a genius. He is unashamed of who he is and what he has. Maybe Junior year he comes back after summer, just a little bit different but no one can figure out why (new clothes? bulked up a little? just a bit more swagger?) and suddenly there are a lot of girls after him, and Farkle has no idea what to do. and Lucas just laughs and tries to teach him how to flirt, and Farkle is going on dates. And Riley is kind of jealous, but she doesnt know why. But she refuses to be the girl that likes a guy just because he changed over a summer. Farkle has been one of her best friends for so long, if she wanted something with him, she would have had it by now, right?

But then theyre alone at the cafe, drinking coffee and its late and theyre laughing, and its all so easy. It should be this easy all the time. But they cant, because their friends. So they just smile and shake it off, but somethings different.

Lucas and Maya are snarky and unrepentant, but their friendship is not tentative. Its a full forced, you mess with one of us you mess with both of us. They have each others back so much its almost like telepathic communication. Riley just raises her eyebrows and smirks. Maya rolls her eyes and tells, just because you used to think Sundance was hot stuff doesnt mean every one does. 

But something happens, and Lucas is falling in with a bad crowd, probably a sports team full of mean jocks, and Lucas lets himself get pulled in too easily. And then theres one night, and Maya has a hand on his chest telling him this isnt him, hes better than this. And Lucas tries to be condescending, you really think you know me? But Maya doesnt flinch, just grips his shirt tighter, of course I know you, I know you better than anyone, just like you know me, now come on, we’re leaving. And he does, because shes right.

Lucas and Maya getting put in jail during senior year for getting into a fight with a bunch of kids from another school. Riley and Farkle having to bail them out. 

Maya and Lucas slowly learning to accept they might have feelings for each other, but not saying anything because Riley is so important to them. But Riley and Lucas have a quiet moment together, and things have been really good between them, everyone thinks theyre going to get back together. But Riley just tells him she knows, she knows he has feelings for Maya. And shes ok with it, they ended on good terms, and she knows hes going to date someone eventually, and him and Maya work, even if they dont want to admit it.

And Lucas is left thinking about what she said, and he doesnt know what to do. And then Maya is up in his face, asking how his time with Riley was and are they going to get back together, because if he hurts her again she will murder him this time and she might be little but she can sure as hell hide his body in a ditch somewhere. And Lucas just mumbles something about him not getting back together with Riley and trying to walk away to class. But Maya follows him and why wouldnt he get back together with Riley? Riley is great, shes the best person in the whole world, why wouldnt he want to date Riley?

And then hes spinning and facing her and shouting, BECAUSE IM IN LOVE WITH YOU YOU IDIOT! And Maya just blinks, oh. And Lucas just sighs, yeah ok, so can I get to class n–. But shes pulling his shirt softly, guiding his face to her and shes kisses him, and its all tender and soft, where everyone thought it would be rough and angry, and hes cupping her face and pulling her closer. Oh, he breathes when the pull apart.

Then they walk to class, and just dont talk about it. Which obviously means Riley and Farkle need to meddle and get these idiots to officially be together. But, ‘we’re 18 now Farkle, aren’t we a little old to be toying around and making schemes like in middle school’.

‘we could lock them in a classroom together after school and not let them out until they talk’

‘that is the greatest plan I have every heard, lets do it’.

And maybe Farkle and Riley sit outside the classroom all night and listen to Maya and Lucas bicker and argue instead of having an actual conversation and

‘doesnt this hurt, watching Lucas fall in love with your best friend’

and Riley thinks for a moment, like the thought never really occurred to her.

‘Lucas was my first love, but thats why its called first love, because they are supposed to be more after it, for both of us’

And Farkle just smiles and passes her a bag of chips.

Riley freaking out about graduation and not know what she wants to do with her life, and what happened, I was 13 like 2 days ago. Why does she not have anything planned. But her parents tell her its ok, she doesnt need all the answers right now, just do what feels right.  

Just give me friendships that mean everything and these losers getting older and falling in and out of love and being rebellious teenagers and doing stupid shit but always being friends. 

I care way too much about this show.

WHAT WAS YOUR:

1. last beverage = water
2. last phone call = my best friend
3. last text message = marco
4. last song you listened to = chains by nick jonas
5. last time you cried = yesterday

HAVE YOU EVER:
6. dated someone twice = no
7. been cheated on = no
8. kissed someone & regretted it = yea
9. lost someone special = yes 
10. been depressed = yes
11. been drunk and threw up = fuck ya

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS: blue green and pink

IN THE LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU: 
15. Made a new friend = yes
16. Fallen out of love = no
17. Laughed until you cried = yeah
18. Met someone who changed you = yes
19. Found out who your true friends are = yes
20. Found out someone was talking about you = hm idk
21. Kissed anyone on your FB friend’s list = i dont have a fb

GENERAL:
22. How many people on your FB friends list do you know in real life = i deleted my fb lmao
24. Do you have any pets = yeah a lot actually
25. Do you want to change your name = nah im starting to like it tbh
26. What did you do for your last birthday = nothing really
27. What time did you wake up today =  5am
28. What were you doing at midnight last night = sleeping
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for = summer
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life = i wish i wasnt so insecure about myself then maybe i could be happy for once but oh well
32. What are you listening to right now = nothing
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom? = yes
34. What’s getting on your nerves right now = my cat
35. Most visited webpage = tumblr 
36. Blood type = idk??
37. Nickname = sil/silly 
38. Relationship Status = waiting to get knocked up by a millionaire
39. Zodiac sign = taurus
40. Pronouns = she/her
41. Elementary = valentines day used to be really cool in elementary school
42. High School = lets not
43. College = im so excited for college but at the same time scared af
44. Hair color = dark brown
45. Long or short = long
46. Height = 5'6
47. Do you have a crush on someone? surprisingly no
48. What do you like about yourself? my hairs kinda nice sometimes maybe once a week only when the moon shines at night
50. Tattoos = 2
51. Righty or lefty = righty
52. First surgery = none
53. First piercing = ears
54. First best friend = i’ve had the same best friend since the day i walked into kindergarden
55. First sport you joined = none lmao
56. First vacation = boston/fall river
58. First pair of trainers= i cant remember

RIGHT NOW:
59. Eating = nothing 
60. Drinking = nothing
61. I’m about to = eat
62. Listening to = nothing
63. Waiting for = saturday
64. Want kids? = maybe
65. Get Married? = idk
66. Career? = i have no clue

WHICH IS BETTER:
67. Lips or eyes = eyes
68. Hugs or kisses = hugs!!!
69. Shorter or taller = taller pls
70. Older or Younger = older
71. Romantic or spontaneous = spontaneous
72. Nice stomach or nice arms = both omg
73. Sensitive or loud = idk
74. Hook-up or relationship = hook up lmao
75. Trouble maker or hesitant = trouble maker

HAVE YOU EVER: 
76. Kissed a stranger = yea
77. Drank hard liquor = yes 
78. Lost glasses/contacts = no
79. Sex on first date = no
80. Broke someone’s heart = idk i dont think so
81. Had your own heart broken = yes
82. Been arrested = no
83. Turned someone down = yes 
84. Cried when someone died = yeah
85. Fallen for a friend = no

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 
86. Yourself = no
87. Miracles = yes
88. Love at first sight = ya
89. Heaven = yes
90. Santa Claus = no
91. Kiss on the first date = yeah
92. Angels = yes

You Don’t Believe Me (p.6)

PART SIX – You Don’t Believe Me

Request: Yes

  • It’s Monday…where is Part 6? 
  • Can you do a part 6 pleeeaaase??? Your writing is awesome and I can’t stop thinking about the story! I gotta know how it ends so PLEASE do another part! 
  • PLZ PART 6 OMFG YOU DONT BELIEVE ME IS THE BEST IM DYING 
  • PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO A PART SIX OMG YOU CANT JUST THROW ME OFF A CLIFF AND LEAVE ME HANGING 
  • Please!! I’m sobbing and i want to know more! 
  • Please make a sixth you don’t believe me!!!! 
  • part 6 of you don’t don’t believe me please? amazing stuff omg 
  • OMG PART 6 OF “YOU DON’T BELIEVE ME (L.H) PLEASE IT’S SOO GOOOOD!!!!!
  • Please please please please do part six I don’t think I could live without part 6 

Plot Line: Y/N finds somewhere to hide while the others worry, and then another decision making circumstance arises. 

Smut: none

I hope you enjoy this! Don’t forget to request for more parts of this, or even for a future imagine/series ect! My requests are open! And I look forward to seeing what you guys come up with

 Part One // Part Two // Part Three // Part Four // Part Five


It was crazy to think that while the world was looking for me, I wasn’t lost– simply lost in my own world. At this point I didn’t actually know anyone was looking for me. But when I got home I sure would have a shock. But for now I swung back and fourth on the swings watching the night sky move as tears fell effortlessly down my cheeks. Ashton was right, what the fuck was I doing? I didn’t know, all I knew was I was in fucking love with two people, two of my best friends and my heart hurt. It felt more like physical pain that the emotional kind and that was eating me up. Running a hand down my face I cried into my hands more, and the sobs got louder. I’d been crying so hard I hadn’t even noticed the presence beside me until I heard a scuffling a little while after I’d silenced myself. Looking over I saw a man, well a teenage boy around the same age as myself staring at  me. Who was he? And why was he here? I gulped a little as he offered me a smile that was to wide. My smile that I tried to offer back was pathetic and unbelievable.

’‘Y/N, right?” the voice asked causing me to raise an eyebrow as I nodded.

“Yeah…and you are?” I asked back, confused to how this guy knew my name. He laughed lightly.

“The names Harry, I was walking home when I saw your little…altercation with Irwin” Harry said, and then it hit me– Harry Styles, the guy from our rival school; Brookway. I just shrugged at his mention of Ashton, I wanted it to disappear from my mind as if it never happened. Harry looked at me for a few seconds before he diverted his eyes to the sky.

“So are you going to tell me why a pretty girl like yourself is sobbing her heart out in a park at two in the morning alone?” Harry asked, his voice was concerned and it was nice someone seemed to care how much I was hurting.

“How does this sound for a tragic cliché high school love story” I said taking a breath before I continued “I was in love with  my best friend for six years, but he couldn’t see it and was dating a girl who was mean and shallow..so my other best friend Michael said to date him to make Luke jealous…Luke being the original best friend” I paused to see if Harry was following and he just nodded for me to carry on. “So I start flirting with Michael and we go out and…then I start to develop these feelings for Michael seen as Luke hadn’t really been around much. Well anyways Luke then decided he loved me and broke up with his girlfriend…but he told me literally hours after me and Michael had lost our virginities to each other. And then tonight after me and Michael decided we were official we went to this freaking party and Luke was wasted so I put him to bed…and…me and Luke kissed and now my head is fucked up” I whisper the last part and hadn’t realised Harry had started rubbing my back as more tears spilled down my cheeks.

“well that sounds like the start of a really fucked up fanfiction or something…” Harry said causing me to burst into laughter, his eyes lit up as he laughed with me.

“What the hell is a fanfiction?” I asked creasing my eyebrows together, Harry’s eyes went wide.

“Are you serious? You have never read a fanfic?” Harry asked, almost like an excited puppy. I laughed again shaking my head. “Right give me your phone and one of these days I’m sending you some” Harry stated, I laughed again handing my phone over. For a few seconds I’d forgotten my problems while Harry made me laugh. I needed a friend away from all of this, from the drama and the boys and I think I may have just found one.


10am the next morning

Harry was walking me home as we talked about everything, and anything. He told me about this girl back at his school who he liked and how she was dating his friend. I was quick yo tell him not to date someone to make her jealous, he seemed to find it funny as he laughed with me. I walked with him until my house appeared at the end.

“This is my stop” I said with a sigh realising that I’d have to go back to normal life now. Harry seemed to sense my uneasiness as he turned me to face him.

“You have my number, if you ever  need to escape just drop me a text. OK?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, thank you. Same goes for you” I said with a small smile. Waving at him I took off in the direction of my house. Walking up the steps I groaned knowing that my mother was home; she wasn’t supposed to be here today. Sighing I looked at all the miss calls and texts that I hadn’t bothered to even open, as I pushed my key into the front door and step inside. But what I wasn’t expecting was to see my mother, Luke, Michael, Calum and Ashton all in the living room mumbling between themselves. When I shut the door behind me all their heads snapped up.

Michael was the first out of his seat as he ran at me engulfing me in his arms, I barely hugged back as I felt something churning in my stomach. This hug felt wrong. Taking a step back from his grasp I heard my mother approach; great.

“I-I was so worried! Where were you?” My mother asked, instead of being stern like I expected her voice was sad and soft. I leant my body into her and sighed and from that small gesture she knew something was wrong. Turning slightly she looked at the boys

“Could you go outside and give me and Y/N some time?” My mother asked as all the boys mumbled and headed to our back yard. My mother guided me to the sofa and sat me down looking at me. “What’s happened?” she asked and I told her everything, and when I mean everything– every little detail down to me and Michael having sex and I spilt my head and my heart to her. My mother was that woman you could talk to about anything and as I finished she took me into her arms and just hugged me– this Is what I’d needed these last few days.

'I-I’m sorry I just like off loaded all that onto you’’ I whispered and she shook her head vigorusly.

“That’s what I’m here for stupid” she muttered into my hair before pulling back looking into my eyes. “Now I’m going to give you my honest opinion, about everything” she said matter-of-factly so I just nodded. “Michael is a sweet boy, but Luke? He’s been there through everything. He sat with you when you cried about your period. Luke punched the guy who pushed you over and I see the way he looks at you. I always have but you two were just too blind to say anything. But today and last night I saw the way Michael panicked, and the way he spoke about you…they both love you very much” My mother paused and I just looked at the ground. “But I know you, and I know how you see Luke Y/N. If you truly love Michael then let Luke go, but if in your heart you honestly know Luke is the one…then you need to do something about it” My mother finished my kissing my temple as she got up to tell the boys to come back in.

“MOM” I yelled as she turned to look at me. “Send Michael in…I need to talk to him” I whispered. She gave me a soft smile and nodded. I needed to tell Michael how I felt about Luke, how I’d always felt. I just didn’t know how he’d take it.


It was quiet  as Michael entered, hands in pockets quickly dropping down beside me on the sofa; knee’s touching and my heart racing. How could I break this boy’s heart after everything? Biting and nibbling on my lip I looked at him from the corner of my eye. Michael looked tired and beat as his eyes kept his gaze on his hands which were shaking. 

 ’’M-“ before I could finish he kissed me, with such ferocity and power that I was taken aback and kissed him back. It lasted a matter of seconds before he pulled away. ’'I needed to do that once more before you break my heart” Michael whispered as a single tear fell down his cheek and my heart shattered because I did love him, more than I’d been allowing myself to realise but I also loved Luke with the same power. I just began sobbing again which seemed to take Michael by surprise as his large arms and hands wrapped around my body pulling me into his lap. Kissing my hair he rocked me and I felt safe. I just kept crying as he whispered sweet nothings in my ear. 

 ’'I-I hate loving the both of you Michael, because you are so good to me, and you haven’t done anything to make me doubt that but Luke’s been that guy for six fucking years’’ I cried and Michael nodded and stroked his index finger down my cheek. 

“You do what you have to do to be happy baby girl, because whether it’s me or Luke I’m going to love you and be waiting for him to fuck up” Michael stated and as I looked into his eyes I knew he’d never hurt me, he’d never break my heart. Luke? I couldn’t be so sure and I once again changed my mind as I kissed Michael. He seemed taken back but quickly responded bringing both his hands to my face. Pulling away for breath our foreheads rested together. “I will love you every day, of every fucking hour” Michael told me and I nodded. 

 ’'I love you Michael Clifford’’ I replied, bringing a hand to rest in his hair. Shaking my head Michael looked at me confused. “Me and Luke kissed last night…that’s why I ran off” I admitted worriedly and Michael laughed causing me to raise an eyebrow. 

“Luke was quick to tell me this morning, I knew it was going to happen at some point because I mean– the nature in which we got together” Michael admitted. I looked at him with sad eyes. “What?” he asked. 

“How can you be OK with what I did?” I asked my voice barley about a whisper. 

“Because I’d walk across fire for you, do you hear me?” Michael asked, shifting so I was gazing right into his eyes. “Y/N I would do anything for you, and maybe Luke would do that too but I’m telling you. I would go through fucking hell to make sure you are OK. So if it’s me or Luke then just know I will always be here” Michael stated, he was so serious his eyes were watering. He meant it. 

“it’s you” I whispered. Michael nodded placing his lips to my head, I finally felt that spark. That one I only felt with Luke, maybe it wasn’t as strong but it was there. “I-I need to talk to Luke” I grumble, burying my face in his shoulder with a sigh. Michael nodded placing his chin on top of my head. 

 ’'Want me to do it with you?“ Michael asked and I murmured a 'yes’ into him. This was going to be painful, but I could trust Michael more than Luke when it came to my heart. Luke was an amazing friend but it took someone else to love me for him to realise I was even worth it. Sighing I looked up at Michael. 

’'Oh by the way Calum met someone” Michael said and my eyes widened.

 ’'Finally? Mr playboy met someone?“ I squealed earning the laugh I loved from Michael.

’'Her name’s Kasia, she’s a half polish girl. Calum noticed her at the party and they hit it off pretty fast” Michael explained and I smiled wide. 

“About time” I murmured. 

“Tell me about it” Michael said a little too loud. 

“Michael you are yelling!” I said with a giggle. 

“Shut up you sound like Ashton” Michael whined as I once again giggle kissing his neck before I sighed. 

“Can you get Luke too come in?” I asked with sad eyes and Michael nodded. 


just so ya’ll know this isn’t near the end,  I have a lot of ideas for this if you keep requesting. Is Michael as good as he seems? What does Luke know about Michael that he’s hiding? THERE’S A LOT HAPPENING AND I HOPE YOU ARE EXCITED.

REQUEST HERE FOR PART SEVEN GUYS

MASTERLIST