i dont know why i am doing this to myself!!!!!!!!

Aka in which crows have pure black wings but kageyama doesn’t so he’s been keeping those feathers under wraps.

how i know i will fail my exam(s)
  • <p> <b>me, a girl who's currently in her exams week, seeing an alpha/omega verse 41 chaptered fanfic :</b> pfft-- dont joke with me im wise enough not to read that. at least not now<p/><b>me, a fangirl by heart, and a sucker for alpha/omega verse fanfic with good plot:</b> *clicks on the fanfic right away*<p/></p>

does anyone else with BPD go through phases where they experience full on ED behavior? by that i mean, a couple times a year i will enter an ED mindset and binge/purge and starve myself, count calories and try not to eat more than 600 a day, and completely hate my body when usually i like and dont mind it. this “phase” will last two weeks-a month and one day i literally just wake up and am tired of feeling that way and feel better about myself. i know becuase of the fast reovery i dont have problems with an ED and i think it’s just having to do with my BPD fucking with me? and i know it’s not an attention thing becuase i have never told anyone about it before and never wanted anyone else to know

i have also gone weeks feeling like i am trans and then suddenly i dont feel that way anymore?? which makes me feel really fucked up like why do i literally experience body dysphoria and hating being female for 3 weeks and the suddently its all over???

anonymous asked:

its so funny to me when aphobes want people to stop identifying as ace like. sorry random internet person i have never talked to before, i dont know why you act so high and mighty but im not gonna change the way i am bc you dont like it. its even funnier when they then send more hate like. why do u care i dont know u u dont know me just fucking block me and move on. jeez.

like, they have no control over our identities? and it’s super rude to force someone to an identity they aren’t comforable with? like i ain’t gonna stop just bc someone i don’t know tries to tell me about my own person. I know more about myself then anyone else does? are you* me? no? then frick off??

-mod stark

*you as in the person, not u anon

MBTI (stereotypes) - Unhealthy Types

WARNING: if you are very sensitive dont read this post.

ESTJ: You are going to follow me. And I am not going to follow you. You are going to help me reach my goals and I will crush your dreams in a second.

ISTJ: I dont even know the rules and I feel so lost. Oh no, you just touched your face! Did you guys see that? Is it acceptable to touch your face?

ISFJ: I am going to talk about MYself, MY family, MY posessions, MY achievements….and…please please can you listen to me because nobody ever does that and I honestly dont know why also everybody hates me but why like I am super nice.

ESFJ: That girl is so ugly. I hate her. *ugly girl walks by* Hey girl! I missed ya. Whats up? I love you very very much.

INFP: Why are these people so mean? Why do they keep criticizing me? Why didnt that person stop in the street to help me tie my shoelaces? Why are you even listening? Why am I even talking?

INTP: …what is this I am experiencing…TEARS? ohhhh a learning opportunity let me check the amount of gases in tears.

ENFJ: I feel alone…like nobody understands me…like I dont fit in…and all of this is because I didnt talk to a person for eight minutes!

ENTJ: I am strong, I am awesome, and you are not. End of story.

INTJ: Sometimes I feel like I am the only one in the county that understands the complexity of life. Oh wait, not SOMETIMES, always.

INFJ: hun, I know whats best for you. You dont. Because you people obviously have no minds and hearts to choose what you want.

ESTP: I thought that you getting hit on the head with a bowling ball wouldnt hurt you so much. It was just a prank!

ISTP: mmm no youre wrong. That isnt the way it is. You have got a huge imagination… a huge and unrealistic imagination.

ISFP: The famous” I may be quiet but I have killed you in my head one hundred times.”

ESFP: Let us have a fight about this really dumb issue. You dont wanna have a fight? Okay lets have a fight about you not wanting to fight me. Let. Us. Begin.

ENTP: I have come to a realization that all of you have hurt me at least once. Now I am going to hold grudges and make snarky sarcastic comments at your super dumb sayings.

ENFP: I am not paying attention to my inner world that I often used for escaping hardships. So does that mean that the things I am going through arent hardships? What if they are just an illusion. Alright then, I am going to pretend I am super bubbly while I am slowly dying inside. Oh, and I will use manipulation to get what I want.

For people who found this stereotypical or mean, I am really sorry. But the title said “stereotypes” and I wrote a warning.
  • what she says: im fine
  • what she means: i find myself sickly attracted to a short cartoon skeleton to the point where i want to fuck a skeleton. a fucking skeleton. its a fucking skeleton in a fucking video game. this is ruining my life. but i want to fuck the skeleton. i am going to draw skeleton porn one day and this frightens me. i look at skeleton porn. thats right, skeletons doing the nasty. how? i dont fucking know but there is ectoplasm somehow incorporated and they fuck with their SOULS. talk about FUCKING MESSED UP. why do i want to fuck the skeleton? i am a disappointment to my family.

freerebelmentality  asked:

Hey, I almost did a thing and wrote Michael. I couldnt because I feel as though I am stealing him from you and I stopped myself from writing him. I dont know why I feel that way, I just thought about you and said 'oh shit, no I cant do that' So I just deleted it. I know you dont own the character but I dont know, he is your muse and I felt as though I was stepping on boundries haha

NONSENSE!!! YOU SHOULD HAVE AND I WOULD HAVE READ IT AND LOVED IT. 

Oh please you didnt need to do that on my behalf. Like you said, I dont own the character and I certainly wouldnt mind at all because I would love to see other writers write him and how they write him.

Please, never ever feel that way. Never. Write what you want to write and dont let anything stop you. I want to see more Michael fics, imagines and so forth.

Other than my own

Get creative babe =D

like???? can someone please explain to me why am i so dead inside??? why do i feel this gaping hole inside of me even when i know i should be happy. like??? in a way i am but idk theres so much inside me missing,,, am i too gay??? am i too empty??? too apathetic??? too cold??? too traumatized??? whats with me!!! why cant i do anything right or like??? let myself enjoy anything??? im always too scared and i run!!! i always end up running i run and i run but it always doesnt end up feeling right so i crawl up in a ball and cry because regardless whether i choose one thing or another i am simply unhappy,, im always stressing so fucking much and????? kill me lol please

Originally posted by bakuryua

Guess who is wide awake at 4am? My messed up sleep schedule and worry about my upcoming surgery, naps in the middle of the day etc are messing with me across the board. I try to sleep. I try to watch tv. But all I do is stir in my own juices.

Tonight I’m on my 3rd cup of Tulsi tea and have reached my fill of Bones and havent even reached the point were I stopped watching originally. I dont know what to do with myself.

Oddly enough, during the summer I’d just grab a tripod, camera, some film and go shoot some photos. Hell, its 70f out there now, I could do that. But, instead here I am. On the sofa, after a failed attempt to sleep. And Im pretty sure I’ll crash out here. I find comfort in the sofa. Dont know why. I guess because its been my place for so long, slept here 4.5 months in 2015. Sat here since March 2016. Its family. And my ass would miss it.

im actually practicing both Islam and Kemetism.

Islam is like, a rank higher than Kemetism in my daily life, and the God of Islam seems to be a Panentheistic Deity, in my opinion.

Are the Netjeru Panentheistic? I dont know.

Are they compatible with each other? I dont know. 

Am I a true muslim? I dont think so.

So why do I call myself a muslim? Cause I do the Obligatory Prayers and such, I practice some of the things a muslim do, so I call myself a Muslim. But maybe I am not a True muslim. You get me?

why am I telling you all this? I have no idea.

why is it important to discuss this? Cause I feel alone, and cause I need help sorting my mind.

What do you want? To practice both religion side by side. 

why cant you? One believes in many gods, the other believes in One Single God.

So thats a problem? Yes.

Why? I dont know. 

do you need help? Yes!

bluplatinumzebra  asked:

I dont know how others on Tumblr get 32k notes and u deserve 1m notes I do really like ur art and keep going I do reeeeeally like ur gency drawings idk how do u do that using ur hands Maybe one day I'll be able to draw a face at least after that achievement I'll be able to "try" and be like u ...i love ur art (And btw what a strange thing to do:I u like drawing make men I mean there is np with that but why)....

Awww thank you sooo much!! I am totally flattered! I don’t consider myself to be that good but receiving nice messages like yours always brighten up my day and keeps me motivated. I greatly appreciate your support.

Haha, is it strange to mention that I love drawing naked men? :D I don’t know why. I just love that. Toned, beautiful male bodies are art themselves.

anonymous asked:

hey im feeling really empty and tired of living and i just how do you keep going i feel like i need to keep living for all these people but just i dont want to do it anymore im so tired theres no point to it all and im just so lonely

Hi fren.

I am so sorry you are feeling this way and I want you to know I get this. For the past two days I have felt so bad and so worthless, I keep asking myself: why keep going? Let me tell you why I do and what I hope I can give to you to help you in this hard and dark time.

I stay alive for the new adventures I am going to have with friends and myself. I stay alive for moving to Portland and living in a small little apartment. I stay alive for Josh and Tyler in hopes that I will continue to be proud of them, share my voice and maybe one day thank them for all that they do. I stay alive for people, not because I feel I must, but because I can’t imagine seeing them without me. Staying alive sometimes is my only purpose, my kitchen sink.

I am not saying that you have to stay with us because we demand you do. No, that is too much to ask and that is selfish. You are validated for your pain and for how you feel. You do not need to be told you are being too much or just having an “off” day. I want you to know that even on your darkest days you are still validated so much and should feel all these emotions.

What do you love? I love to paint, listen to my vinyls, talk to people, also love baths. Find something that you love and try to channel all the pain and the loneliness you feel. No matter what you do, do it so you can feel everything and let it all go as best and as the way you want it.

Tyler took his own pain, his demons, his need to leave this earth and turned it into music. “i need something to kill me” to “i want to say hello”. You do not need to be a musician to have this moment. I am still in the grey zone between wanting to live and be happy and wanting to disappear into the universe. I want to say hello one day and I hope you do too.

Josh turned his life into drumming with a passion, sharing his own struggles with anxiety, being a bright light for a lot of people. Him and Tyler have come to show us that hey, we do not have to be okay. We are allowed to hurt and to greet these emotions. 

I want you to know the following:

  • I love you
  • You matter in this world
  • The pain will pass in time, I promise
  • no matter what, you are valid.
  • I will always listen to you and be here
  • Never forget that each day is a new one

Thank you for reaching out to me, I hope that what I have shared has been somewhat helpful. You are worth more than the pain that you feel. Never let that go, feel the emotions. I love you, stay alive. One day at a time, that is all you can do.

xx

Originally posted by jxhslerclxque

do you ever just watch someone and watch their smile and their face and every little thing they do, every little thing about them, and think: holy shit i love you. i am in love with you and everything that you do. you are my entire world and i love you. i can’t stop thinking about how much i love you and i will never be able to stop. i just love you.

*silently screams because I am so done with coloring this*

I know I drew this with the intention of trying to push myself, but I also neglected the advice of “know your limits.” OH WELL. I think it’s not… bad? It’s good? I’m going to say it’s good and make myself feel better.

Also: Leon I love you but why do you have to have so many colors on your palette.