i dont know where im going to write it out in public

DATING CAMILA MENDES WOULD INCLUDE

since nobody is writing about how camila is sooooooooo girlfriend material (and im so in love with her), here it is:


•  it all started with you two being good friends, and as friends, you kept getting closer and closer

when she found out that you were into girls she smiled so big for herself 

• bc you were this cute girl that since she looked at you she wanted to get to know better 

• at first you texted a lot, and everytime she saw something funny she sended it to you

• bc she knew it would make you laugh and that would make her really happy

• then you started hanging out everytime that she wasnt filming for riverdale, like in between takes you’d go to where she was and take her to grab lunch or something

• you tried getting spoilers from her but even tho she really trusted you already she couldnt tell anything

• but she loved how you got so frustrated bc you. needed. to. know.

• so she teased you a lil bit, saying things like ”this may or may not happen”

HOW SHE ASKED YOU TO BE HER GIRLFRIEND before that everybody thought you were a couple anyway

• you were sick, like really sick, so she being the caring “friend” that she is showed up at your place w some soup, and why not flowers (something that she learnt from playing veronica) 

• even tho you melted when you saw her with all of that, you didnt want her around  because you were afraid shell get sick too

• but she didnt care, she sat right next to you on the couch and put some movie on netflix

• you were falling asleep with your head on her shoulder and she was looking at you, playing with your fingers

• she probably wanted to ask you to be his girlfriend “properly” like, with a long speech  and give you maybe some chocolate or candy

• but while looking at you the words spilled from her mouth

• “hey do you wanna me like, my girlfriend?”

• “what”

• “what”

• both of you started laughing and oFC YOU SAID YES I MEAN

• so thats how you started dating

• thats when all the fun began hehehe jk

• her phone and yours would be filled with silly photos of you two

• you know that video of her cooking and laughing about it in her ig story? you’d have tons of them doing mostly everything

• like one day, she took your phone while you were showering bc she was bored and her phone didnt have any battery, and going through your camera roll she found this video you took from her while she was watching her favorite movie because you loved how her eyes lighted up whenever her favorite scene was on the screen and how loud she screamed when something “surprising” happened even tho she watched it thousands of times

• she would do the same, because you’d have that kind of relationship

• she comments on every single one of your pics, really short comments like “i love you” “im in love” “mOM” “gorgeous” “mine”

• her mom loves you, and likes to cook for you bc she seems so nice and lovely

• when she is mad over something really silly, she starts speaking portuguese and you just stare at her while she’s screaming walking around the room until she let it all out

• “i was doing it again?” “yup” “im sorry”

• but theres times where you two are cuddling facing eachother and she is putting your hair behind your ear while smiling and shed say “eu tenho tanta sorte“ or “você é tão bonita”

• you wouldnt get anything of what she said (and she probably wouldnt tell you) but youd smile so big because you knew it was something nice and when she speaks in another language is the cutest thing ever

• PDA !!!!! lots of pda

• but not the annoying type like sucking eachother faces in public, but holding hands, long hugs, cheek kisses, forehead kisses !!!

• at least twice a week you go out to eat or have a cute coffee date, talking bout life sitting infront of eachother, holding hands over the table

• she never fails to make you laugh, she’s always doing goofy things or trying to imitate someone (and failing)  just to put a smile on your face

• its 2:34 AM, the lights are gone, the only source of light is coming from your computer screen and you two are dancing in the living room to some random spotify playlist

• you can go from steamy hot makeout session on the couch to sloppy slow kisses filled with love

• she sings to you whenever you ask her 

• she is probably singing 24/7 GOD BLESS HER ANGELIC VOICE

• but if you’re having a rough time or you’re feeling sad, she sings to you in a low tone kinda whispering, while smiling sweetly 

• i dont think she is the jealous type  ? but if anyone is looking at you in a way that they shouldn’t she’d wrap an arm around your waist, not like in a “she’s mine back off” type of way, but in a sweet “i love her dont steal her from me” type of way im crying 

• SHE. IS. A. TEASER. LIL. ****

• you tried cooking together, but you endend up getting too “distracted” and burning the whole thing

• “lets order pizza” “but i dont want pizza” “what do you want?” “you”

• she appreciates you and loves you so much bc if she is dating you she is 100% focused on you so she wouldnt be the annoying cheesy type, but definitely cheesy

• when she is away filming or busy with her work she sends you selfies doing funny faces, or videos at set with the cast, or a pouty selfie with a “cant wait to get home :(” that makes you melt inside who wouldnt

• PET NAMES !!! she probably calls you “love/babe/gorgeous”

• and she is your little nugget, of course

• play nights at your place with her friends (and yours) happen a little too often, because is everything you love and need: wine, charades, friends, and eachother

PLAYING CHARADES AND SHE BEING THE ONE TO GUESS WILL BE KINDA LIKE THIS: “oh oh oh i know that one!” “pETER PAN!” “no??? mmmm aLICE IN WONDERLAND!” “what, no?” “WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN BABE?!?!?” “no wAY IT WAS F HAPPY FEET”

but it doesnt matter is you win or lose the game at the end of the night, bc she’d wrap her arms around you and say “i win, i have you”

i love her so so so so much okay?????? it ends right here before i start crying she is the most precius lil bean bye

tw: @softnessmalik

anonymous asked:

How do you even become cosplay guests with no skill?

LOL I can’t tell if this is sarcasm or honest seriousness but, here’s what I got! 

First and foremost, being a convention guest is not just an honor and a priviledge, it is a job. 

A job that has responsibilities and expectations, and should be treated as such. When Sylar and I go to a convention as a guest, we are 100% working. 

We have a work resume for conventions, a contract, a portfolio of programming, and more. Because that what you are really, programming. Even if all they want you to do is sit at a table and sign things, thats still programming. Its your job to   represent the convention, and give con goers more content for the tickets they bought. You owe it to them to make sure your 100% postive, there, working, and providing something they can’t get anywhere else. 

And all con guests are asked to attend for different reasons. Some cosplay guests are asked to come because they are widely known for their technical skill and they will provide programming related to that. Or they simply have a huge fanbase, and are keeping their fanbase happy at your location, therefore spreading that market around. 

Sylar and I work hard on our panels. We’re also trained speakers. Both he and I have taken classes, in college, about public speaking. We implement that and our presentation experience into all our panels. As well as our meet and greets at the table, interviews for the con’s media (there is a ton of backstage media going on that most con goers don’t know about. A lot of con time for guests is spent locked up in some empty room giving an interview,) and any floor time we have. 

We also have 7 yrs experience working conventions. We have run cafes, hosted events, planned gatherings, organized raffles, done mutiple panels and workshops. We’ve also worked as Guest Liasions ourselves, written out program guides, sat at registration tables, and MCed masquerades as well as judged them. All things that involve systems, filling out paperwork, knowing how to handle negative situations, and doing menial tasks. Heck, we’ve even done set-up and break down for dealers halls. We know cons. 

And this is something valued because honestly, its not a job for everyone. 

Lots of cosplayers out there with amazing technicality skills just don’t like catering to crowds. They aren’t good speakers. Or they don’t have it in them to sit at a table for 6 hours just listening to strangers speak and ask them questions. Or they might hate having to write out workshop forms. And thats okay! But thats the difference between who gets asked to guest and who doesnt. 

Guests have to be okay with not getting time to shop, not getting time to hang out with their friends, and devoting all their energy to the convention goers. Devoting their whole day to smiling and talking and making sure everyone who meets them goes away happy. 

If you are interested in coming a guest, awesome! My biggest tips are; 
Figure out what service you can provide to the convention experience. What are you good at that you think a con needs? How can you expand that? How can you turn it into programming? Are you a health nut – maybe do a panel on dieting and working out, anime style!  Awesome at writing and editing? Fanfiction panel! A cosplayer who loves acting but hates sewing? Think about being a commentator for Cosplay Chess or the AMV contest! 

Start volunteering now. All cons need volunteers and this is the best way to gain experience in the feild, just like any other job. I have friends that started volunteering as security for a con and now they run a convention of their own. No joke. It’s also helpful to know and understand the inner working of how a convention is run if you plan on guesting at one. It helps you help them by knowing what types of panels work best, what programming would work for that con specifically, or even just give you ideas on what their budget for you might be. 

Write. A. Resume. Seriously. Just like you have a resume for job searching, write up a resume for cosplaying. How long have you been cosplaying? How many costumes? What skills do you have? Armor making? Public speaking? What experiences? Any awards? What topics are you an expert at that can be turned into an hour of programming? Put it alllllll dowwnnn in youurr resummmee. 

Also, protip, you can always write to a a convention’s program director yourself and ASK to be a guest. It’s a job. Submit your application.

Hope this helps! 

And funnily enough – this is all information that we talk about in our panel, Cosplay and Convention careers. Where not only do we cover working for cons, but we cover translating cosplay and con work into LIFE CAREERS and how to translate being in a maid cafe to a resume for a 5 star resturant hostess. Lol. My entire Graphic Design resume is pulled from cosplaying. And now I am a full time graphic designer for a state university.

Touhou Characters and Fans: A Comprehensive Analysis

In this article, I will be presenting my in-depth research on the characters of Team Shanghai Alice’s Touhou Project in relation to their fans. The conclusions I have reached after conducting extensive minutes of research through bing.com are not based on any individuals, and especially not you in particular.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Would you be up for Bughead angst? Like maybe the two of them get into a fight over something huge, like he gets jealous of another boy who likes her or Betty feels like they're growing apart because they don't hang out as much/he's not very affectionate anymore and she confronts him about it only for him to argue? That's only if you're up for it! If you are, thank you!

I’m always down to write anything, I have to warn you though, usually all of my stories end in happy endings. I’m a sucker for a good fairytale ending!

*****

People moved on, it happened, it was a natural way of life.

Betty just never thought jughead would move on, from her.

It was obvious what was happening, he had fallen out of love with her. He was distant. Cancelling dates, pulling away when she tried to kiss him in public, and almost never returning her texts.

She racked her brain for hours last night , trying to figure out where it all went wrong. She knew she was difficult, and she could be selfish, lord knows her temper wasn’t as it should be, but jughead always understood, whenever they had a problem, they talked about it.

The last four weeks had been horrible, school had been getting in the way, jughead had been working on rebuilding his relationship with his father , while Betty’s relationship with her parents was falling apart in front of her eyes.

She was tired.

Jughead deserved the world, and if she couldn’t be that for him, it was time to move on.

She still loved him, god she still loved him, no matter how bad he had been treating her this past month, and because she loved him so much she had to let him go.

He would find someone else.

Someone with less baggage, someone who could make him happy.

Weighing the red and grey flannel in her hands she watched as a tear fell on the familiar shirt.

He had given her this flannel after he caught her shivering at the drive in. He had walked all the way home in just a black tshirt. She wore that flannel to bed every night.

One day he caught her all cuddled up in his flannel and smiled

“That’s my favorite shirt”

She had tried to give it back, but he shook his head

“Looks better on you”

She would give it back today, kind of a sign of closure.

She had texted jughead and told him to meet her at Riverdale park, it was an emergency.

Sitting on the cold bench, the sun setting in front of her she couldn’t believe what a beautiful night it was.

She almost wished for rain, something more fitting.

Suddenly the beanie wearing boy came into her vision, his frown now a permanent feature on his face.

“Betty, what’s the matter, what’s the emergency?”

She patted the seat next to her and smiled sadly

“Sit down, we have to talk.”

Taking a hesitant seat, Jughead glanced down at the shirt folded in her hands

“That’s my shirt, what’s going on?”

Taking a deep breath, Betty began

“I’m sorry I can’t make you happy anymore, I’m sorry you’re so angry all the time, and I know it’s partially my fault. I wish that I could make this better but I can’t.”

Jughead went to interrupt her, his eyes wide

“Let me finish, what we had was amazing, I’m never going to forget this. I love you. So much. And I know you’re gonna find some gorgeous girl out there, who was meant for you and who makes you happy all the time. I want you to have that, you deserve that. So I’m letting you off the hook.” She placed the folded up shirt in his lap and smiled softly

“Goodbye Jughead.”

Suddenly he was standing directly in front of her the shirt wrinkling under his clenched fists.

“You’re breaking up with me.”

She took a shaky breathe, she couldn’t remember the last time they were this close

“It’s for the best, for both of us, you need someone who can make you happy, and I need someone who loves me.”

He was angry now, she wasn’t sure at what though. Her? Himself? The situation?

“You think I don’t love you?” He said in a raspy whisper

She stepped back one step, but he stepped forward keeping her close

“Jughead…”

“I love you more than anything in this world. You think I’m not happy? You’re the only thing that makes me happy. Im not losing you. ”

Betty was taken back by the intensity in his eyes for a second, before she got angry.

“No. no, you don’t get to act like this, you haven’t been around in a month jughead, I’ve been on my own, you have your own life I get that, but I thought that maybe I was part of that life.”

His eyes widened at her sharp voice before he exclaimed

“You are! I’ve been so busy trying to fix everything, trying to make things okay, trying to be better”

“That you forgot about me” she interrupted
“I never asked you to fix anything, I love you just the way you are.”

“You don’t get it Betty! I don’t want to be some loser, gang members son, you deserve more than that for a boyfriend!” He was yelling now

And she was crying, tears streaming down her face

“I never asked for more! if the person that you’ve been this last month, is you being “more” I don’t even want it!“

“It doesn’t matter, I have to change, for you, for my family. It’s my responsibility to be the man you deserve. That’s just how it is.”

“I DONT WANT THE MAN YOU THINK I DESERVE, I WANT MY BOYFRIEND BACK” Betty screamed into the quiet park silencing jughead instantly.

Taking a watery breathe, Betty wiped at her tears

“If this, new person, is who you want to be, then be him. But, the jughead I fell in love with was never afraid to tell me he loved me, or lay around all day watching movies and eating popcorn. Your dad will love that jughead just as much as I do, you don’t have to change who you are, for anyone.”

Jughead looked at her, taking in her shaking hands and her red rimmed eyes.

“I ruined this didn’t I?”

Betty looked up at him, connecting their eyes

“I don’t know jughead, it can’t go on like this.”

“It won’t.” He assured her “I’ll fix this.”

She looked at him as he held out the flannel to her

She took a deep breathe, weighing her options

“Please” jughead said softly, his eyes pleading

She finally reached out and grabbed the flannel, their fingers brushing, she silently thanked what ever god was up there for the fact that the spark was still there.

Apparently jughead had felt it too because before she knew it she was flat against his chest, the flannel squished between the two.

She allowed herself to relax in the familiarity of her boyfriends body

“This is gonna take work”

She felt jughead nod from above her, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

“I know.”

isn’t enough time apart? (Zach Dempsey x Reader)

Hey! so i’ve made a new imagine, its more like an introduction when they found each other but i could easily leave it there although ive already wrote some things for an upcoming part II. I’d love if you let me know what do you think, if you actually want a part two (with the more personal stuff) or if its just crap and i shouldn’t write anymore

Resume: Zach and the reader found themselves working together after 10 years since their break up when they’re fully professionals 

Warnings: this contains some real facts and i tried to be as responsable as possible but don’t forget this is fiction, and also dont forget english is not my mother lenguaje. I literally wrote a cat grant reader

Words: 1070

Keep reading

okay, so i’m borderline cross with this whole ordeal so here’s my take on it

Y’ALL LIKE JUICY ANALYSIS, RIGHT? 

this “jeonlous mouth thing” have been around for sometime now and i dont honestly get the negative feedback people are starting to impose on its name these days ????? 

shipping in general, as much as it leaves so much of a bad taste in our mouths and as much as i hate to admit it myself, is run by the delusional (read: responsible for delusion) cogs in our minds, lubricated by the teeny-tiniest details of the pairing’s words, actions, quirks and personalities to fulfill our wild desires to prove “TRUST ME, THEY’RE BANGING EACH OTHER ” and to act as supporting evidences to back-up this “constructed reality” of what we want them to be.

the thing with jikook // koomin otp, as most other kpop pairings are, is that they’re members of the same group or band or whatever you want to classify BTS as. one way or another, they’re bound to have a relationship, may it be purely for their careers (a business relationship, as described by SHINee’s Jonghyun in one of their Happy Together guestings) or an established platonic one, heightened by the difficulties they’ve dealt with and the feats they’ve achieved as a group. 

from this, we can branch out to a ton of “stuff” for a lack of better word, and i can only discuss (read: rant) so much

EXHIBIT A

bts members are friends more than co-workers and we are very much aware of that, as opposed to those groups with their contracts sufficing as the adhesive to weave each other together (c’mon, this is not a shade). i dont know about you but in a squad (a group of friends rather, if you don’t like seeing that word), it’s most probably mapped out that as humans, we’ll be drawn particularly to one of them; hence, the best friend phenomenon. 

so…are they best friends? well, there’s still taehyung in the equation and there’s no way we can dismiss him like that. (side remark here: the three of them can just be each other’s best friends, you know? im aware that this is an actual, real life thing that happens to other people…but i’ve been in that circumstance and it’ll be hard juggling your attention and love equally that it’s more deteriorating than beneficial to all ends) now, taking into consideration how much emphasis the whole korean culture put into respect and age, the maknae line just transcends through all that , BUT

1. jimin and taehyung are close (even regarding each other as soulmates in one of their recent fanmeetings) esp because of the fact that they’re of the same age, meaning, the level of comfort with each other is as much as korean society expects them to have. they’re not just “comfortable” brothers more than chingus though, they’re that comfortable with each other it’s beyond classifications (like there are classifications, but you get the point).

2. maknaes are very much endeared in the whole korean “age-and-respect-and-authority-and-hierarchy” landscape (can it even be called that?). jimin has shown how much he cherishes jungkook even tracing back to their predebut days up until now, successfully fulfilling the role of hyungs in korean standard whose role among many others is to take care of those younger than they are. other members also treat jungkook fairly similar or sometimes even topping jimin’s treatment to the maknae aka taehyung, whose life source is probably skinship + aegyo with other members (we’ll get to that) and the whole reason im confused who’s whose when it comes to this best friend thing 

3. still in the korean view of age, you address those older than you with respect by how? c’mon, we’re all nuts about kpop how must we not know? there’s oppa, unnie, hyung and noona (this addressing thing is more of an asian thing than mere korean, really). now, here’s the catch: jungkook calls jimin hyung borderline merely (read: close to the bare minimum). a mere slip-up? a moment of the perfect mask idols need to sport, carelessly put aside? more than anything, it just fuels the fire in this situation. jungkook addresses his other hyungs with the names they need to be called, even taehyung he’s very close with. and this just show that jungkook considers jimin a chingu, one he can comfortably act towards, (just like jimin and taehyung’s relationship, being the actual chingus here) despite the apparent age difference.

i dont know if i’ve gotten to anything at this point, but i’m lenient to the concept of jimin and jungkook being the best friends which explains most of the things they do together which leads us to:

EXHIBIT B 

skinship between friends, more specifically friends belonging to the same sex (gender’s a bit more complicated concept, you guys), is the most normal thing in korea. they probably are most expressive with each other to the point that it baffles foreign onlookers, a good example of which are the int’l fans.

remember what i said about taehyung? all males in korea are practically like him, even stemming from young age, being touchy-feely here and there with friends.now, ever wondered why apparently jikook is not a huge, blown out of proportion ship in korea as opposed to its stance in the international fanbase? yup, that’s because for koreans, seeing jimin and jungkook’s interaction with each other is like seeing the average same sex chingus walking downtown or their buddies at school as they do everyday. holding hands, feeling each other up, sitting on laps, pecks on the cheek (less observed), and even touching thighs, crossing the boundaries of what foreigners would deem appropriate, is common and normal (have i made my point about this issue yet? i’ve become a broken record,my goodness).basically, there is no such thing as personal space in korean culture of friends; thus, skinship is prevalent.

a very much related issue to that is korea’s view on homosexuality. no matter how peppered with the stereotypical gay (not meant to be taken offensively, guys im also a queer folk hi) interactions and copious displays of affection korea is, homophobia is still present. it’s too ridiculous that it’s become funny. you can tell me how korea has become liberated and all that shit but the thing is, they’re not. korea is just downright a conservative country (is this an offense too? oh god). korea is still anchored to the concept that people are only and only and only limited to a man-loving woman and woman-loving man. topmost reason why idols cannot come out and identify as different from the two because to deviate from the norm is supposedly throwing away tradition and rude and can spite everyone around them that they’ll lose their job.

i dont know where im going but i still am in check of what im talking about. bottomline of this exhibit is holding onto the contradicting persona of korea, jikook is all but nothing more (this is proper grammar, you guys) than a thing of delusion.

EXHIBIT C

kpop idols love to treat their fans and bts is not a loser in the game. they give back quite warmly to the fans. they deem armys highly because, nonverbatim, bts is nothing without their fans. fans are the reason among others (to dismiss their hardwork is plain rude) why they’ve made it this big. so they’ve got fanservice in store for us, the majestic element of them all, leaving us in a baffled rut whether or not our otp’s interaction are candid or sheer fanservice. THEY ALL KNOW THAT THEY’RE PAIRED WITH EACH OTHER. a gift for the fans? publicity stunts to gain the favor of their audience? whatever meaning fanservices hold in the hearts of our dear bts members, it just ups the notch of the level of our delusion when it comes to our ships 

(it’s heartbreaking, i know. i didn’t even want to write this part out. if you can just sense my unwillingness to write on the matter ㅠㅠ)

EXHIBIT D

let’s go back to what actually irked me and cross me so much that it driven me nuts to the point that i actually spend my time writing this long ass rant. 

“jeonlous” = a jealous jeon jungkook

now, this has gathered a negative connotation primarily but is not limited to two things:

a. “this jeonlous thing manifests a relationship with an abusive undertone” (okay, so i constructed that sentence to make their claims much more rational than it fucking is)

b. it does not make sense for jungkook (and even jimin) to get jealous of other members/fans/other people not them in general

firstly, what does it mean to be JEALOUS (can you see my eyes rolling?)

in the evolutionary, biological scale, is the exhibited response to the threats to the relationship they are in because monogamy that’s why (a reality that’s manifested almost throughout all the animal kingdom) 

in psychology, is the complex emotion that’s not just about anger, abandonment, fear or sadness; it’s the simmer that’s aroused when a valued relationship is somehow not in its standard state and there is raw desire to regain the affection and/or attention. it’s even described as “a necessary emotion because it preserves social bonds. it motivates people to engage in behaviors that maintain an important relationship.” a clinical psychologist characterizes jealousy as something we don’t have much control over, and that it is a natural, instinctive emotion that everyone experiences at one point in their lives. 

it just follows that when jealousy is at hand, people tend to do things that has become seemingly second nature tics to them. now, this is a good reason to back up the jeonlous mouth/tongue thing, how much of a mere coincidence it may be. jealousy is not bound to romantic tones; it can encompass siblings fighting for their parents’ attention or even in friendships. so that’s a yes, yup, jungkook can get jealous of other members because he has that valued relationship (refer to exhibit a) with jimin and there will be a lingering longing in him for jimin to get back at being jimin again (read: showing him affection and attention; emphasis on him) 

don’t get me started at this abusive, emotionally manipulative relationship issue here because it’s just absurd and this rant will be longer than my lifespan i dont even know anymore (ok but the insecurity that is woven in the ambiguity of jealousy may also be responsible in driving someone to emotionally manipulate his partner to the point of abuse BUT JK JUST WANTS JIMIN’S ATTENTION BACK SO WHAT’S ABUSIVE HERE calling this whole ordeal abusive is too much of a stretch like really? really? y’all are actually taking this into consideration? really?)

(okay this rant had high hopes in presenting evidences to support my claims but i havent slept a wink yet and im also half angry ????)

the thing is, as much as we’re delusional in shipping jikook, y’all are just delusional claiming that the fucking quirk jungkook exhibits is abusive WHAT DO WE EVEN KNOW ABOUT WHAT THEIR ACTUAL STATUS IS IN THE FIRST PLACE goodbye y’all im just im–ugh this is so dumb

you wanna know the catch about this jeonlous thing that gets me every single time? IT’S THAT IT’S FUCKING CUTE. AND I’M SHIPPING THEM TO MY PLEASURE THAT IT GIVES ME JOY TO SEE THESE MOMENTS WHICH GIVES ME LITTLE SPARKS OF HOPE THAT MAYBE THEY’RE MORE THAN FRIENDS YEAH I KNOW IM DELUSIONAL BUT MOSTLY BECAUSE IT’S CUTE and that’s good enough reason for me to fawn over their “supposed” romance 

y’all are hypocrites enjoying the jeonlous thing one second then next second, condemning it after reading a post and riding the mainstream. Y’ALL NEED TO SIT THE FUCK DOWN (also reevaluate the hypocrisy but oh well)

Dating J-Hope(Hoseok) Would be like

im gonna die okay jhope has been my bts bias for a long ass time end my lIFE

  • so this sweetie pumpkin pie delightful sunshine baby
  • dating him is a pleasure and a gift and u better be treating him right otherwise u are one of The Worst people 
  • do you like sunshine and constantly laughing and being full of joy?
  • if so, then that’s what you’ll get by dating Resident Sunshine Jung Hoseok!
  • he’ll make u laugh every second of the day bc it’s his favorite sound
  • he would be so proud of you and everything you do like
  • “MY GIRLFRIEND CAN DO 5 WHOLE PUSHUPS CAN YOURS DO THAT? NO. NO THEY CAN’T. MINE IS AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL AND STUNNING AND-” 
  • “HOBI WE GET THE GODDAMN PICTURE YOUR GF IS AN AMAZING ANGEL SENT FROM ABOVE NOW SHUT  U P” -Yoongi, at some point probably.
  • having such a beautiful and loving relationship that makes everyone around you 2 simultaneously jealous and happy for you its v conflicting 
  • he tries to teach you bts dances or just how to dance in general and at first you just goof off bc you l o v e hearing that beautiful laugh of his it’s like the sun is shining my crops are growing my grades are good my skin is clear and world peace has been achieved
  • anyways he’s teaching u how to dance
  • and while u goof off a little bit you really are trying your best to learn the dance bc it makes your man so proud of you and nothing feels better then making Hobi proud of you 
  • and when he plays the music after the 30th time of doing it you think ur gonna die but then u absolutely s l a y it and as the last note fades out you fall on the floor like how does your bf do this for a living while also singing like holy sh i t 
  • but Hobi is screaming and jumping up and down and he runs over and picks you up off the floor and spins you around in a hug and gives you kisses all over your face 
  • and he puts you down and you’re both sweaty and disgusting
  • and your hair is stuck to your forehead and you’re still trying to breathe and ur 99% sure you smell like armpit rn but to Hobi you’re the most beautiful amazing person in the world bc not everyone can dance BTS’s dances bc they’re hard as shit and you haven’t had any idol training and even tho it took a while you learned it and you did it and you didn’t give up and he couldn’t be more proud of you and he feels like his heart is gonna burst out of his chest
  • and suddenly you’re pressed against the practice room mirror and you’re kissing him as if he’s your only source of air and your hands are in his hair 
  • and his hands are going up your shirt and he’s pressing hot open-mouthed kisses against your neck and i can’t breathe 
  • when the two of you have finished you’re laying on the floor just holding each other basking in your accomplishment and the fact that you’ve just banged in the practice room for the 8th time without getting caught 
  • and suddenly he just sits up and looks at you with the most serious expression ever
  • and you’re really startled bc tbh you were almost asleep but now he’s holding both your cheeks in his hands and looking at you like you’re going to disappear and he’s just drinking in your appearance as if you’re water and he’s been in the desert for the past 6 years
  • he just grabs your left hand and kisses the palm of it and
  • being totally completely dead serious he asks you if you would ever consider marrying him one day
  • and you look at him as if he’s dumb bc of course you’ll marry him
  • as if there was every any question of not marrying him 
  • sometimes he gets insecure that he’s actually annoying you and you’ll leave him for someone else like his old gf did and you have to remind him that there has never been anyone but him in your eyes and there will never be anyone but him in your heart
  • his name for you in his phone is “Moon of my life”
  • and he changes his contact name in ur phone to “my sun and stars”
  • bc he’s a nerd but u love this nerd so u dont bother to change it bc its also v true
  •  you’ll stay at the studio and watch him dance as long as he needs to be there like you could be there until 3 AM and ur sleeping on the couch there and he tells u to go home and get some proper rest and u refuse bc u don’t sleep well unless u sleep w him
  • FC IKGNS S I N TIME MY BITCHES HELL YEHA HELL YEAH
  • we all know this boy is a double threat 
  • u know the type, the ones who can rap and dance
  • those r the dangerous ones bc not only can they kiss HELLA GOOD 
  • but damn those dancer hips snapping into you at the speed of light
  • sex w Hobi is so hella fun like u thought Taehyung was fun boy howdy this guy is w i l d
  • less kinky then tae but still hella up for most anything once
  • his main goal is still to see you laugh and smile and have fun even during such an intimate and loving act
  • most of the time it starts out with him tickling you and it leading to hot makeouts where his mouth moves onto that one extra sensitive spot on your neck and his hands are still gently tickling your sides but in a different way then before 
  • he’s sUCH A FR E AKING LOUD GUY DURING SEX HOLY SHIT
  • HES EVERYTHING AT ONCE
  • MOANING GROANING GASPING GRUNTING DIRTY TALK SWEET TALK IT ALL COMES OUT AT ONCE AS SOME SORT OF GIBBERISH
  • not like ur much better tho w the way he fucks u into the bed face first
  • he had such nice ands and such pretty lips and he knows ur weak for both and he takes every opportunity to use that against u bc he is one hell of a tease
  • literally tho no place is safe no space is sacred to him he’ll bang u anywhere like sometimes ur watching a movie and u end up watching it upside down as he pushes into you while ur half off the sofa
  • or over the kitchen table
  • or on the counter
  • or the shower
  • or the floor
  • in the practice room
  • literally he’s so versatile and loves adventure and the way he makes love is just like that
  • sometimes while ur trying to screw on the sofa or on the side of the bed someting goes wrong and u end up in a tangled heap of limbs and u both make eye contact and try to register what happened before you just start laughing s o hard!!!!
  • SIN TIME OVER OKAY IM DEAD
  • hobi gets v v emotional when he can’t be w you bc he’s a very physical person like his love language is definitely touch 
  • he’s s u c h a cuddle he just wants to be touching you in any way anywhere
  • he always wants you to sit on his lap no matter where you are
  • he loves spooning and it doesn’t matter if he’s the big spoon or the little spoon as long as he’s holding/being held in some way
  • he likes to wrap his arm around your shoulder or waist when ur in public but he also think’s its hella cute to link pinkie fingers
  • so many inside jokes
  • Hobi tries to be happy n positive 24/7 and it takes him a while of being with you to realize that he really can come to you no matter how he feels and you’ll still love him it doesn’t matter if he’s not feeling to sunshiny today if there’s a cloud over the sunshine it’s okay, it just means the next time theres sun you appreciate it more
  • and you slowly teach him it’s okay to be sad bc it makes being happy so much better
  • always being there for him in the rare moments he does break down and just holding him and rocking back and forth until he cries himself out and feels better bc sometimes all u gotta do is cry it out and everything is better
  • he is a l w a y s ready to talk about kids
  • he can’t wait
  • like literally if u thought taehyung was jumping the gun Hobi has already bought a 2 bedroom apartment and is secretly decorating a nursery 
  • and he brings you over to see it and he gets really shy and nervous on the ride over bc he doesn’t know how you’ll react bc he knows he’s thinking waaayyy to far ahead but he can’t help himself he loves you so much and he just wants to show you that he may be goofy and he may have a hard time being serious sometimes and he might not be the strictest father in the world but he just wants to have a chance to have a life with you 
  • bc to Hobi having a family is the ultimate goal 
  • like BTS is his family and his actual family is beautiful but having something that is entirely his own is beautiful to him
  • he just falls asleep and dreams of a little girl with your eyes and his dance skills and your smile and a little baby boy with his sunshine and his smile
  • and he just wakes up and watches you sleep for a little while and he just k n o w s
  • no matter where he goes or how far away or for how long he leaves you or if he lives far away or close by or right next door
  • hobi always knows that his forever home is with you and that will never change
  • and that two bedroom apartment is waiting to be filled with happy memories of you two, and any extras you might have along the way.

fUIkINg destroy me i cried writing this fuck hormones okay jus t end me

~Admin Hedgehog who is emotionally drained from this 

anonymous asked:

who is pete wentz writing songs about?

mikey way. okay, here we go.

so, in the summer of 05 is when most people think it started because fob and mcr played warped together, but, they had also played the year before and thats when i think it started. as many know, pete single handedly wrote the entirety of from under the cork tree, which was released may 3rd of 2005, which means he had been writing some of it the previous summer. most of the album is quite cheery, depicting the emotions of someone who is battling some darker force within themselves, but is also experiencing a happiness from someone else they dont think they deserve or should have (short version: an emo is in love). also, theres the parallel between dance dance and favorite record- dance dance depicts a literal and emotional dance, and then in favorite record you have “i cant remember just how to forget the way we danced”. so, based on research and educated opinion, i believe that the petekey fling started in 04.

then, the next summer both bands were again picked for warped, which only intnsified the relationship. after weeks of spending excessive time with each other and attending each others shows, the media took notice. in an interview that summer, when asked about it he responded “me and pete wentz arent dating. we are both heterosexual males… sort of… maybe… umm… next!”. on may 16, 2005 mikey was spotted at a fueled by ramen show watching fob at house of blues wearing a white jacket that allegedly belonged to pete. a few days later, pete posted a list on live journal of things that get him hot and bothered. on taht list were a.having a crush on a person i speak to nearly every day and b.white denim jackets….

on tuesday, june 28, 2005, pete posted the following on livejournal: “Amazing New Mexico sunset. im hanging on a bridge with my friend mikey from my chem. its all orange and pink above us. we went to another water park again. i love high fives again. totally back in love.” on july fourth he posted an entry that ended with “hot and miserable but totally back in love”. on july 15 he posted “Though I am over hearing your thoughts on haircuts and pants. I’m over us trying to be perfect tens for your little eyes. We don’t care what you think of us. Listen to a song and time your heartbeat. Let it be okay to fall asleep slow tonight. Think about a good friend. Think about god. Think about death. Think about someone elses hand clumsily on your belt in the dark. Think it will be okay. No more rants. No more poetry. Not tonight. True love for the believers”. on july 17 he posted “wrote you a goodbye note (you just wrote me off) on your arm when you passed out. bestfriends, exfriends- better off as lovers not the other way around. racing through the city in the back of yellow checkered cars. the takeoffs are the worst but the skin from your shoulder to your ear makes it all worth it. and im sorry the way my moods flicker on and off like old light on your porch, but i know you wouldn’t have it any other way. sneaking in your window instead of out. the way you hold a cigarette cause you don’t know what to do with your hands when we are sitting this close. the way the waists of pants feel better at the ankles. the way you always were my best excuse for calling in sick on everyone else. i miss you”. which later became the song bang the doldrums, which was origionally titled summer of like (pete mentioned this in a rolling stones interview), which is now what fans call the relationship between pete and mikey in 05.

during that summer, fans claimed that mikey and pete didnt want to be photographed together, which is kind of suspicious…. but there are a few circulating the internet, and quite a few of mikey wearing clandestine (petes clothing line). at this time it was also common for fob and mcr to trade band members, mikey would play bass for fob so pete could take his mic into the crowd. pete also frequently watched mikey play with the stupidest smile on his face….

there are also fan reports of them being seen together. “ at my warped date i got there early in the morning and hung out by the fob bus because i wanted to get a pic with patrick and around 10 am the door opened and a very tired looking mikey stepped off with pete right behind him and they appeared to be holding hands until they saw the people around and they both refused to have their pictures taken together ”. and “during Fall Out Boy’s set (they were one of the closing bands that night) they dedicated one of the songs to Mikey, who was watching from the side of the stage. Pete said, “This song is about revenge. Right, Mikey? Revenge!” Mikey smiled and nodded, and during “Grand Theft Autumn/Where is Your Boy” he mouthed along to all the words.”

pete also posted at one point “i wish you were my bass, not just my friend”. on august 19 he posted “ Warped tour was fun. Since being home I remembered that showering and sleeping are fun too. My real feelings on the sunburst bass. I loved that thing. But then it started cheating on me with mikey way. I had to hit it. Its not my fault- spousal abuse is an ugly thing. I’m in therapy that includes playing lots of warcraft online. Writing messages on your arm for someone to see at a show is the new away message - stealing peoples real diary is the new livejournal”.

on september 4, pete posted “on the getaway car, the rush of blood to the head: it’s strange to find myself again back at the feelings of the blue cover after going through the red and the gold. its kind of always like that. i am sorry if i am not making any sense. but everybody likes to take chances and make bets. i always put my money on the longshots. and no matter where my head was in the world i always dreamed of waking up next to the biggest brown eyes i have ever seen/’meandyouunderneaththehoneymoon’. “go back to what it meant back then”: and you imagine yourself moving deep into the summer and disappearing, and for me it was always with you. and then things got crazy. you stopped calling me back. i stopped trying to call but not in my head. and then you got malicious but i’m guessing only because you learned from the best- take back your taste and all. i never thought it would be just me again. but that’s okay. we’re gonna hole up and wait it out. i feel like i can see for the first time, like i was born just in the last minute. wake me up. baby boy, you’re gonna be okay. hearts between our knees sticking to the summer sheets. are you catching my drift…. its gonna be alright. your love would be hell but its just not hot enough baby.” (Note… baby BOY)

after petes nudes were leaked, hey chris wrote him a public letter which contained the following: “you know the friends i have and you know how we feel about loyalty. you know who im talking about and you know they’re not happy either.” and shortly after chris posted pic of him and mikey saying he’d “found new love”

the summer of 06, peter once again had some interesting things to say. on july 7 he posted “im so sorry, but not really. (‘straighten up and die right’) i said i want to be rebuilt like a frank lloyd wright only without all of the water damage. or painted over like a monet only less blurry. she said “no, youre something different”. like what? “something better”. it gave me the rush of warm blood like you see in cartoon dogs right before their eyes pop out and all of the bells go off. my head is spinning like a car off of an icy guardrail. show me what you are made of. your eyes were always rolling but youd tilt your head so they were somehow always still stuck on me (have your cake and eat it too). i feel safe but not like a bet more like the way mothers feel when the lock the car doors in bad neighborhoods. i am blue waves across the red rootlike veins in the bodies drawn flat in medical books. i wonder at the way that someone can write thousands and thousands of pages about my insides. when i met you i gave you a name- not your own- but in my head so i wouldnt ever mix you up with anyone so ordinary- i cant tell you- but to me it meant salvation. you only wanted reaction. but i cant be bothered. not anymore. ill see you in the spring. first pew on the left. wear your white veil and dont forget the words. warped tour. sun drenched days. bestfriends. new roads. so long salvation. dont worry your pretty little heads. i am sleeping safe tonight.” then the next day, on the 8th, he posted “the fraternal order of the handsome boy. ive been watching you from afar. my breath on the inside window as you walk in from the carcandy caned lies in red and white against clashing patterns bending in and out of understanding. ”youre the stranger ive been dreaming of”, stranger than any ive ever known. love through a telescopic lens. when the air is clear i can see how perfect you are for me. late at night when the city sleeps i cast a spell on you to make you think of me the very same way i think of you. i only love how the words feel in my head when i write them. fireworks over the valley. how can i tell you i gut people for a living. that everything you say is likely to end up as evidence when i rewrite history. over and over again. how everything you do reminds me of something else, someone else. how i get paid to be humble and arrogant at the same time,to be chased and never caught. that i just want to stay up late and wake up early to talk to you. that i want to show you all of my jealousy and insecurity and have you not care. youre like a light switch and i just want to turn you on and watch them all shrink away. the words come out of my fingertips on impulse. it is instinct. my head cant keep up. i envy the comatose. i admire the bedridden. i am addicted to the way i feel when i think of you. ”im blowing smoke rings around the moon….” i wish i was the exact opposite of how the world knows me.”

then, there is infinity on high, which is basically completely about mikey (especially bang the doldrums, because it was born on live journal right after that summer of like…) and ab/ap, due to the constant reiteration of a past love, my favorite being fourth of july with “you are my favorite what if, you are my best i’ll never know”

also othe fact that neither of them can hold a true relationship with women without it ending badly. perhaps because there is someone out there that they are simply destined to be with…. 


so yeah. pete wentz writes a lot of his music about mikey way.

Tattoo (smut)

Summary: its your first time getting a tattoo and your artist Robbie can tell your nervous so he helps calm your nerves *wink* 

 Warning: oral, fingering, public place.

A/N So I decided to write this because I got my first tattoo of the evenstar from the lord of the rings yesturday! In this imagine you can imagine any tattoo you want.

(Y/N’s pov) Todays the day, I’m finally getting my first tattoo! Ive wanted one for so long and now I’m finally getting one! But I just cant get my nerves to calme down…hope I dont pass out during the session. I’ll just eat a big breakfast and drink a lot of water and I should be fine… 

 *skip to tattoo parlor* That breakfast and water didnt help at all, Im literally siting here shaking in my seat. Maybe I should I should just leave? No Y/N you’ve wanted this for so long dont be a wimp! Ok, ok just relax, calm down, deep breaths.

 “Y/N Robbies ready for you, his room is down that hallway and second door on the right.” The lady at the front desk says. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god! I stand up without even realizing and walk to his room, I peek my head in and see… 

 One the hottest guys I’ve ever seen, which didnt help calm my nerves at all. He smiles at me and I fully walk into the room. There are pictures of the tattoos hes done all over the walls and some of his own designs as well. He stands up from his seat and walks towards me, thats when I notice his tattoos.   

 “Hey you must be Y/N, Im robbie.” He looks me up and down and stares at me with an emotion I cant really distinguish then holds his hand out for me to shake. I shake it but my hand starts shaking.  “A little nervous are we?” He chuckles. I shyly nod my head.  “Its alright, most people are nervous for their first tattoo. You’ll be fine, It’ll be over before you know it.” I felt a little better after he said that. “Thank you”

 “Ok, so do you have the picture of the tattoo you want?” I couldn’t help staring at him again, hes just so intriguing. He notices and  smiles, making my cheeks go red. “Uh yeah sorry, here it is.” I pull up the picture on my phone. “Nice, here’s my email, just email it to me and we can get started.”

 I do what he said and he prints out my design. “Ok, just sit in the chair over there and put your arm on the table.” I nod my head, nervously smiling and sit in the chair. My palms are all sweaty and my arms are shaking, I feel like throwing up.

 Robbie comes over and shows me the cut out design. “Is this big enough?” I look at it, and nod. He smiles, noticing Im scared. “Just relax, you’ll be fine.” I just close my eyes and take a few deep breaths. “Ok I’m going to place this on your arm and you tell me if you like where the placement is ok?” I nod. He starts lining up the design with my arm but stops, probably because my arm is shaking so much. “Can I try something?” He asks. “Um sure, ok.” “Just lean back.” I do and then he makes the chair lean back as well.

 “Comfortable?” “Yeah actually, thanks.” I smile at him and he does as well. “good” Then he leans in and captures my lips with his. My eyes widened, I didnt know if I should kiss him back or not, I dont even know him. But he is cute, so why not? I kiss him back and I feel him smile. We pull away after a minute and he starts kissing down my neck. “Have you ever had someone eat you out before?”  My eyes widened, I wansn’t sure if I heard him right. “What?”

 He pulls away from my kneck and laughs lightly. “Have you ever been eaten out before?” I look at him confused and all flustered. “Um no, why?” “Thats what i’m going to do, you’ll feel much better after trust me.” I still couldn’t believe what I was hearing, was he serious? I knew he was when he started pulling my pants down. “Uh Robbie, I-I don’t thi-” “Shhh It’s alright, trust me ok?” Well I mean its not like we’re having sex right? I guess this is ok…“Ok”

 He pulls my pants the rest of the way off then pulls my knees up and spreads them. He smiles at my dark green underwear. “Greens my favorite color.” Then he starts the inside of both my thighs, I sigh loving the feeling. My underwear comes off soon after and I tense up, feeling a little self conscious. He gives me a reasurring smile befor he leans in and licks a stripe up my heat. I whimper at the feeling and accidently buck my hips up to feel his mouth on me again. He gives me a lustful look and dives in again, griping my thighs as I grip his hair. He moves His tounge all over my heat, up and down side to side, sucking on certain parts, I have to bite my lip to keep from moaning to loud.  Out of no where he shoves his tounge inside me going as deep as he can, I let a loud moan escape, not caring anymore.

 He pulls me further towards him so he can go deeper. Then he replaces his tounge with two of his fingers, letting him go even deeper. His mouth moves to my clit and I pull his hair tightly, we both moan and the vibrations sen me to a whole other world.  The combination of him fingering me and his tounge licking and sucking my clit make me a moaning mess. Not to soon after I feel a Knot forming in my stomach, I think robbie could tell because he starts moving his fingers faster and deeper into me hitting my g-spot. “R-Robbie I’m cl-” I Couldn’t speak anymore, robbie could tell and he lightly rubs my thigh letting me know that he knows. The knot in my stomach finally releaces and I let out a loud moan, then go limp in the chair, Robbie’s toungue likes me clean and he gives me a minute to catch my breath.

 “How was that?” He asks smiling. I smile too “It was amazing.“  "Good, you ready for your tattoo now?” I wasn’t even nervous anymore. “Yeah, Thanks.” After he places the design where I wanted he made a small line just to show me how it felt. It wasn’t as bad as I thought. It still hutn, just not to bad. “That wasnt so bad was it?” “Not at all.”

  It only took about 40 minutes then I was done. He let me look at it in the mirror and it looked amazing! I thanked him and gave him a very genorous tip. He put some plastic around it and told me everything I needed to know about taking care of it.  “Hey um, can I have your number? I would love to see you again.” 

Now he’s the one thats nervouse. I giggle and write it down on his hand with the pen he gave me. “Maybe next time I’ll be the one helping you out.” I wink at him then walk out the door, leaving him all flustered, Im definatly coming back for another one. 

daddy always does it better | daddy!yuta

Group: NCT 127 | yuta & female!reader

Request: “is this page okay with nsfw content because im craving me some daddy yuta”

Plot: you knew better than to go against daddy’s rules. But it had just been so long and you couldn’t help yourself.

Notes: this is 2k words i dont know what happened i kind of got a little out of hand,,, sorry for any grammar mistakes! give me tons of feedback as this is the first smut i’m posting here. warnings for light bdsm and heavy dirty talk! enjoy, love. im lame for listening to hide and freak while writing this smh.

You were screwed.

It had been weeks since the last time you and your Daddy had any time to play, and though some of his rules were bendable, there was one that was to never be broken. You never touched yourself without Daddy’s permission.

Yuta was a pretty important man in his company and lately he had been so swamped with meetings and the like that the second he came home, the two of you would eat dinner and go straight to bed. Occasionally, He would watch an episode of your favorite T.V. show with you or something but anytime you wanted to play it was always, “Daddy’s tired tonight, sweetheart.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I NEED THE HP WORD VOMIT AU. You are seriously my favorite writer ever and everything you post is gold.

IT’S REALLY CHEESY it’s like 1D rpf superwholock crossover level like i said I’LL PUT IT UNDER A CUT so im less embarrassed please don’t laugh at me 

Keep reading

okay so ive been seeing alot of bpd posts scolding other borderliners because of their behavior and i just have to say my piece abt it

i dont get why people feel the need to drag borderliners for their erratic behavior. personally i think it’s hard enough to have to argue w/ neurotypicals who tell me i’m:

abusive, distant, dysfunctional, mean, unbalanced, possessive

do you think i dont know i shouldn’t be this way? do you think i am comfortable and content with me being this way??

because let me tell you, IM NOT

so first of all, do you think im making my posts to glofiry my mental illness?

ANSWER: i’m not. i’m just trying to get by and, what are the odds, speaking about it instead of internalizing everything makes it feel an ounce less horrible

this blog, for me, is something i use to VENT about my problems, thoughts and issues. it’s just like a diary only online and open to the public. this is where i go when i feel 1. horribly depressed and need to distract myself from doing smething i shouldn’t 2. manic and need a distraction ( again) 3. lonely 4. in need of affirmation that I’M NOT ALONE in being this way

one of the reasons why so many of my relationships went to shit and i COULDNT GET BETTER AND AMEND MY BEHAVIOR was because i had 0 idea of what my symptoms were. i never introspected because i didnt know how and because i didn’t know anything i thought the problems lied with everyone else

i make posts about my intrusive thoughts. doesnt mean i act upon them

i make posts about splitting. doesmt mean i ditch the person i split on (every time lbh no one is perfect)

i make posts about my fp. i type out my jealousy, my fear of abandonment, my possessiveness. does that mean i act on my feelings? NO. and guess what? thoughts and feelings are something we are not in control of. i know it’s not fair to ask for my fp to give me 100% of their attention always. i can’t help that i feel like that. but do i actually DEMAND them to do it? do I act upon my thoughts and feelings? hell to the no. and that’s it, as long as we don’t act upon it!

i dont know how it is for everyone else because i am one person and i, by no means, speak for everyone, but for me it helps  a lot to read about all i mentioned and more because then i can recognise it in myself and take it into account to then IMPROVE my behavior or at least try my very best to accommodate it. if someone writes about how they feel and i relate i think oh so it’s a bpd thing, that means i need to watch out whenever i feel this way to avoid being abusive/possessive/whatever.

ive learnt a lot from these posts because some things i didn’t know was abusive but as soon as i realized it i IMMEDIATELY made sure to try and correct that in myself. i wish i would have known sooner because it would have spared me and everyone else so much hurt

and before you type out a response to this, let me also emphasize that I DO NOT encourage abusive behavior from us. my point is not that we shouldnt be called out when we are behaving in an unhealthy way that affects ourselves and others. i for one WANT to be told when i’m being out of line because

I.  WANT. TO. GET. BETTER.

what i DONT want is to be yelled at by others in an aggressive manner, dragged, or guilted because of the way i am. in case you forgot, this is a disorder, one that as far as i know there is no recovering from. i can’t help that i have a possessive mindset AS LONG AS I DONT ACT UPON IT.

if i do, hell call me out! (but please do so in a way that’s reasonable and involves calm formlation rather than aggressive pummelling because i dont respond well to it because i get distraught) 

and finally i want to say that i get why some of you are angry. i dont want to attack any of you for your opinions, i’m just trying to defend myself here and you are right, we shouldn’t hide behind our illnesses and use them to justify what we do.

but honestly some of us arent there yet. again, i’m not justifying what were doing when we slip up and make a mistake but we’re all having a tough time. lbr we’re borderliners, it’s always gonna be tough. adding to that by making us feel worse will probably result in a setback rather than improving

so PLEASE keep on making posts about how to IMPROVE ourselves and our behavior, but please please please don’t go about it the aggressive , attacking way. i’m much more open to accepting my wrongs when i dont sense aggression and im sure that applies to others

thank you and sorry if some aspects of what i meant didnt come across

I made a short, 3 am thing here about a Neil who grew up as his father’s son rather than Riko’s player, and now here’s my rant about it. (I will write about it eventually, alongside my Cinderella AU and my cliche high school AU. Maybe. I’m aiming to do so) (What should I call this AU? Heir AU? Butcher AU? I think I’ll go with Heir for now)

This got incredibly long because for some reason I decided to plan an entire fic wow

  • so this is a nathaniel who was never sold to the moriyamas
  • a nathaniel whose father was never in debt
  • a nathaniel who takes the time to learn how to take over his father’s empire
  • he learns how to cut and carve and the best places to aim and how to cut a man’s eye out and how to torture with only a few weapons
  • because hes not at risk, his mother doesnt take him away
  • i imagine that, considering her own history, she doesnt let him ignore her side and teaches him how to fight physically and how to use a gun
  • (not that nathan would let him ignore that either, but he wouldnt prioritize it like she would)
  • perhaps nathaniel grows up beside ichirou rather than kevin and riko because theyre heirs to their fathers
  • now, nathan and mary frown upon exy but it keeps him in shape and it does something with his pent up energy
  • besides, exy makes him seem normal-ish
  • (hc nathan puts nathaniel into a private school and the private school happens to have exy)
  • until nathaniel turns thirteen and he makes his own kill
  • its gradual but hes brought into the business more and more as he grows older so he has less time for exy
  • and nathaniel cant say he really likes being the future butcher
  • but he knows better than to go against his father and mother
  • but then kevin day happens

Keep reading

I wrote this after I realized how hard it is for me to talk to normal people. It really hit me and all I knew was that I had to write down what I felt and you're gonna learn a lot about me. Not finished but enjoy my craziness.

Life is crazy. If you really take the time to think about it , everything that happens could be described as a miracle. Youre living right now and youre you right now, just think about that, there are infinite possibilities on who you could have become and you are who you are right now, but are you really being you? If you take a look at yourself right now do you like who are and how you act in the public eye? Everyone is trying to impress each other and it hasnt just become thius way and it isnt just in cleveland or ohio or america its the whole world, throughout history, forever. Its conformity, wanting to be in style is destroying the human race, limitimg us. Its sad that i cant even blame people for not wanting to be different because i know that theyre scared because people dont like different, humans are close minded and selfish and we have always hurt people for being different. And its crazy because the only reason im able to speak this way now is because ive never been good at conforming even when i tried and i ttruly did.
As far as i can remember i always felt out of place, even around family, especially around my family. I hate to say this but my family is made out of a bunch of truly dumb people and i dont mean that as an insult, i mean it truly and i hate to say this even more, my mother is the worst of them all. Everyday i realize this more and more and everday i thank whatever universal force there is that i am the way i am. My family does nothing but argue, i have no real connection with anyuone in my family and even when i was younger i realized this and so even the people that know me best know little to nothing about my family. Its sad but i think i had to learn a lot about the world on my own, I had no Father figure though i am named after him but mmaybe thats why ive been going by Hamilton lately, because he dosnt deserve me as a son. I am 19 years old now and the last time i seen him i was five and in a way i thank him for leaving because i wouldnt be me right now. I know nothing of my fathers side of the family and i have step siblings i have obly met once. Thinking about this makes me wonder how i got to this mindset even more.
My mothers side of the family consists of my grandmother, my aunt, my uncle, my aunts son (my cousin), and my uncles two kids (other two cousins), and my sister of course, these are the only ones i have interacted with. My uncle is doin the best because he got away, he moved to Japan years ago and has started his own family and is a teacher there but even he was never able to fully gain a connection with me, i dont even know if i truly care about him or anyone in my family for that matter. My aunt has basically given herself to religion (which i will talk about later) and has even married a preacher, she like my uncle has basically abandoned the the sinking ship that is my family. Her son, my cousin, who as a kid i enjoyed so much went to jail when i was still young and didnt get out until it was already too late (hes back in jail again as i write this) to make a connection with me, he is maybe the only one who couldve been a figure for me.
Being close minded is the worst thing you could be. Thats what my mom and grandma are. They completely refuse to change any idea that have in their heads so thats why they are dumb and so it is impossible for me or anyone to really talk to them. They are lonely and i know it, but its too late to save them. I dont live a privileged life, i truly had to work for everything that i have. In this house we have gone months without heat and hot water during the winter and we have gone months in scorching summers without cool air. My mothers everything wasnt enough. Its because the way she was raised by my grandmother who is just insane and angry at the world. I dont know much about how my mother and her siblings were raised, i only here passing stories like the time she held a knife to my uncles throat. Whenever she argues with one of my family members now she says that she would kill them if they were around her and i believe her.
However everything that my family is, it all goes back to how they were raised, it made them who they are and unfortunately it looks like my sister is taking after them and letting them run her life (shes 11 months older than me). Then why am i different? Was i born to think like this and not be like my family? Ive known for a long time that ive wanted to help people but today i think ive realized how im supposed to help I cant save my family members but maybe i can save you and whoever else reads this by passing on my philosophy on how we as the human race should be living. I feel like ive become more and more enlightened recently and i feel like i was always meant to reach this point but first i want everyone to understand how i got here to who i am now because while i was born different it was a process to get to where i feel like ive woken up.
The first stage of going through this process is becoming extremely arrogant and i truly did think i was better than everyone for a long time in my life, all throughout middle school and for half my highschool experience. This arrogance always made me lazy and in school i was never one to care about grades and i didnt realize until recently that its because im not meant for school and there are probably many others who feel the same. Even now when i feel good about life and everything, i still have no motivation to try in my classes and if youre reading this and feel the same way trust me when i say that you shouldnt try to force it, at least not in college. I went to a private catholic school since 2nd grade and somehow ended up graduating from middle school and i even made friends who i know to this day but unfortunately my grades (and my mothers funds) were not enough to get me into a private high school and i ended up attending a public highschool, james ford rhodes.
This ended up being the peak of my arrogance, i looked around at all these kids who acted so differently from me, even more than what i was accustomed to and they all seemed so dumb to me and all the high school work seemed so easy which made me even more lazy and i ended up doing the bare minimum for the rest of highschool as well. I forgot to mention that as a kid i had the biggest morals, didnt even start cursing until 7th grade and that was only to get attention when my middle school “popularity” went down. I read too many books and i thought i was meant to be a hero and be truly the best person, so even in high school i looked down on those who drank or smoked anything. Looking back now i realize that in those first two years of high school i was lost, i realized i had no friends and this is when i truly tried to be like the rest of kids in my generation and it worked a little bit, although i became a shadow to the little people i knew at school, i was a background character and it sucked because i knew i wasnt being me and i was realizing more and more that i didnt belong.

my opinions on the signs (aries sun/pisces moon/cancer rising/aquarius dom)

super duper biased (im so sorry leos…)

aries: ive only met a few other aries in my life but weve NEVER gotten along. always starting arguments but refusing to finish them.. and they have a tendency to be immature. they have trouble apologizing. every aries ive met has been very defensive and always secretly extremely insecure but youd never be able to tell until you really got to know one. I will say though that they are very passionate about what they care about and if theyre on your side they will defend you even if youre wrong. theyre also adorably spontaneous. brutally honest when theyre angry. dont have much of a filter between their thoughts and their words.

taurus: I have so many tauruses in my life that im extremely close to. the ones i know are HORRIBLE with dates, times, remembering things, being on time, etc. which at first came as a shock because everyone says theyre extremely serious and reliable. oh well! i love them anyways. when a taurus cares about you however, they will be willing to drop everything for you anytime. incredibly giving people with hearts of gold. theyre so silly and sweet and have great senses of humor but theyre serious when need be. are SO passionate about the people they love. such romantics and so incredibly sensual. theyre so protective and great at comforting people. lazy until they absolutely need to get shit done (but somehow they always get it done). Love ‘em.

gemini: I LOVE geminis. my best friend is a gemini and she is by far the sweetest, most understanding, and diplomatic person ive met.
the geminis i have met have always been extremely fair and level headed. some tend to be overly worried about appearance, but others are the exact opposite. when it comes down to it they can internally be very petty but they will very rarely let it sway their opinions externally. every gemini ive met has had lavender as their favorite color?? odd but a cool little fact. tend to be hilariously sarcastic. very reliable. EXTREMELY intelligent.

cancer: yall are FUCKING CRAZY but i cant help but hang out with you guys. quick storytime: one of the cancers i know cut off the top of her sisters finger with scissors because she messed up her drawing, and another cancer i know lit a public toilet on fire and just left the restroom because they were “just really angry that day”. the cancers i know are TERRIFYING PEOPLE. emotionally you guys scare me because you feel everything so intensely. backstabbers to the max. SO FUNNY because theyre constantly roasting the hell out of people but constantly make me so so nervous. so quick to talk shit. i will say though you guys are really interesting and ive had a lot of really deep conversations with cancers. i appreciate them for the way they are and im sure there are some totally sane cancers out there.

leo: im so sorry to all the lovely leos out there but the leos ive met have RUINED this sign for me. they have always matched every leo stereotype. they are so whiny and live for being the center of attention. incredibly dramatic and jealous. some of the biggest gossips ive ever met. they never stop talking and when they are talking its always about themselves! SUCH inflated egos. so self absorbed. just very stereotypical negative leo behavior. im sure not all leos are like this so im sorry to all the amazing ones out there, but wow the ones ive met are just mean.

virgo: Ive never met a virgo???? where are you people? do you exist? youre probably cool. im going to default to saying that i love you guys. virgos = cool probably. idk

libra: I either love or hate libras. on one hand some of them are very fair and thoughtful, bubbly and loved by everyone. on the other hand though theyre a pain in the ass to deal with. they always want the very best, and tend to be extremely rude when that isnt what they recieve. such flirts. some of the libras i know are such good people though, and they give REALLY thoughtful gifts. a reoccuring stereotypical thing ive noticed is that they all love glitter for some reason. very crafty people. they can be super manipulative in order to get what they want. mixed feelings. judgemental as hell but only behind closed doors. the libras i know love making other people happy.

scorpio: I dont know many scorpios but i hate seeing how cynical and untrusting the ones i know are. very brutal people. but with the negatives aside, their intensity is invigorating and they turn heads like no other sign. SO intimidating but its only because they seem so well put together, mature, and otherworldly. genuine people though, and they are the most real people ive met. loyal and passionate.

sagittarius: ahhhhh! I know a lot of sags and I love you guys for the most part. always up for a good time and so creative. hands down the most fun sign. so exciting and interesting, intelligent and quirky. honestly, the most fast-thinking sign ive met. the most funny sarcasm out there. the people i know with this sign are such comedians and they live to make people laugh and brighten peoples day. its hard to make them mad because theyll brush you and your lousy opinions off so quickly, but that means theyre really difficult to sway when they believe in something. they tend to be right about things, and always have a “gut feeling” about any situation. just really warm, nice people. sweet smiles, too.

capricorn: some of my closest friends are capricorns. theyre the definition of ride or die friends. most loyal sign ive met. theyre the masters at hiding their emotions and their emotional seriousness has a tendency to scare me a lil bit, but theyre just really cool people. you can come to them with absolutely anything and theyll always want to help. such memes tho. good taste in music. theyre so complex but appear so simple. SO GOOD at storytelling and writing. brutally honest, but in a productive way. doesnt take bullshit. ever.

aquarius: ive only met 2 but theyre such aliens i swear. theyre so cool though. very spacey, cute senses of humor, VERY chill. theyre really clever and creative too. independant as hell and sometimes they just want to be left alone. they always seemed a little detached from reality. cool as a cucumber.

pisces: and the award for most passive-agressive goes to pisces. honestly though i love you guys. youre so empathic and caring, and THE ABSOLUTE BEST to talk to about problems, deep thoughts, or just random stuff with. just the best people to carry on conversations with. the pisces i know arent shy at all, but just naturally quiet. i will say that you guys are so difficult to talk to when youre upset because you have this tendency to shut down and block out the people around you. very sensitive and you tend to take things to heart very easily. extremely intelligent and innovative people. you always seem lost in thought, and im always curious about what youre thinking about.

LIST OF WHAT IM WORKING ON RIGHT NOW/WILL START SOON

A/N: this is not all the requests, but y’all wanted info on what i was working with/plan to and here you go!!! if you really wanna see something else for ANY group ( girl groups too ) then tell me, this is just whats in my notes as of now, will continuously update 

EXO

  • Gender fluid partner has a nightmare
  • Kai CEO themed elevator smut, it’s wild postponed for now in memory of my Kai hoes
  • Luhan + facesitting smut
  • Dating Kris would include
  • Sekai threesome (chicken boy and limp noodle)
  • Yixing + BDSM + blindfolds + public teasing (aka all the traits my son dont have yall makin me sin)
  • Doggy daycare!jongin au (postponed for my Kai hoes until yall get better)
  • Baekhyun daddy smut (plot twist hes the one calling you daddy)
  • Chen + jealous professor smut
  • Ksoo + BDSM (natural)
  • Ksoo + face sitting + squirting + daddy kink
  • Sehun + how to kiss (fluff probably)
  • Yixing being dorky and trying to cheer you up fluff
  • Chen + nsfw!catboy au
  • Chanyeol + very awkward strip tease and beet red ears
  • accidentally sent the wrong text message to you and it was a picture of my dick but you dont seem too mad so hey with sehun 
  • phone sex with minseok because our schedules are terrible and youre halfway across the world but i need to get off
  • au where chanyeol doesnt know how to talk bc hes mute and fuck how does he tell you you look so pretty today if he cant even say hi to you on the bus in the mornings??? fluff
  • ksoo + jongin threesome in which they find out you can squirt and it turns into a fucking competition and youre running out of panties

GOT7

  • College professor Jaebum smut (fuck me u[p)
  • Dating jinyoung (jr)
  • Dating youngjae
  • Romantic/smutty married morning with husband Jackson (he burnin some pancakes but you still give him pussy for effort)
  • Jackson + orgasm denial
  • Jaebum competition with jacksons extra hyper friend smut like yall going in on competitions like “i bet i can run faster than you” but then hes like “bet i can make you come in less than 10 mins” and its wild 
  • Mark + bath bombs “wow look its fizzing what the fu-”
  • Got7 orgasm competition on you smut (2nd place winner)
  • Jaebum fluff, teacher!au (this gonna be so cute….)
  • HIGHSCHOOL!AU where jackson makes it his senior wish to take you to prom featuring an unreluctant you and some help from chess player!youngjae, apperances by jock!jaebum and others 
  • au where jinyoung is your super harsh boss and fucks you just as harshly against glass windows 

BTS

  • Taehyung breakup + makeup idol!au
  • Bts reaction when you’re a makeup artist and they have a crush on you
  • Namjoon sub (maybe idk I am not big on writing other ppl besides me as a sub lmao)
  • Angel!jungkook au, where he watches over you plus lots of fluff and maybe some wild angel sex and a sarcastic demon!namjoon 
  • Jin + blowjob in the supermarket while hes looking for cheerios 
  • Jin + jhope threesome
  • Serial killer!jin smut (trust me on this itll be good)
  • Yoongi rapper!au + diss battle + confessions
  • Yoongi + fingering + bath
  • hoseok + shower sex
  • Jimin make up sex
  • Jhope + back room sex
  • Jin + “stop grabbing my butt, Jin”
  • Yoongi x namjoon x reader polysmut + fluff
  • Fighter!jungkook au (smut, fluff) (we all know this boy gonna cry if he even gets pushed but lets pretend) 
  • Jhope + first date at a circus (no hes not part of the act)
  • Bangtan face sitting circle w jungkook, Jimin, and taehyung ( LORD HAVE MERCY )
  • mission “get jungkook to tell his older sisters bestfriend hes fucking in love with her’ + noona kink 
  • “what do you mean you don’t like this chain? 3 dollars” sarcastic yoongi and some terrible roleplay that gets even worse 

SEVENTEEN

  • Jun + using my wifi for porn college au smut (fuckin nasty, prob got some weird kinky porn on there)
  • Fluffy morning with woozi (plus a blowjob like come on can i not be nasty)
  • Vernon + being protective of his girlfriend (chan is too touchy for his liking)
  • Skater boy!vernon au “wanna see a wicked kickflip tho?”
  • Dating Jun would include (grease)
  • Mingyu + kinky spooning
  • Foursome with Seungcheol, jisoo, and jeonghan, + voyeur seungkwan
  • Jeonghan + breathplay ( WINNERRR)
  • First time with Vernon
  • Wonwoo makeup sex after angsty/emo fight
  • Woozi + handjob in studio
  • Woozi + shower sex (y’all want me ded???^)
  • seungkwan is really rude to you but he just likes you alot and has no other way of communicating his love and he has to tell you before you leave to america for the summer au fluff
  • “this isnt a hickey” fluff where scoups tries to explain to the kids that you and him didnt do anything but you walk in wearing his tshirt with wild hair like what whats going on
  • “giant maknae” dino au in which he really wants you to take his crush seriously but you keep fucking having heart eyes for joshua and he has to do something fast
  • mingyu + sex in your old house while youre over at your parents again featuring a guilty mind on your part and neediness on mingyus 
  • meanie + you getting it in real quick before they have to go film for one fine day and youre not gonna see them for like 2 weeks and hurry up and come mingyu theyll be back in 8 mins

SHINEE

  • Dating literature major!taemin
  • Dating Jonghyun
  • Press your number!au + sugar daddy taemin (im the sugarbaby)
  • dating onew (loml)
  • Dance instructor!key (a fav of mine./…..,,,yes)
  • in which you let taemin and minho babysit yours and onews kids and this is the wrong fucking kid oh my god 
  • backseat sex with key while minho grimaces in the car next to yall cause youre at a fucking drive in
  • taekai +you and a puppy date 
  • skype sex with minho he wildin

VIXX

  • Leo + neck kisses
  • Leo and a movie night date (boring movie, getting the nasty on ensues)
  • N + movie night also but like way cuter bc hes fucking cute
  • ken + him serendaing you outside your door and fuck my parents are gonna wake up dude you gotta go

INFINITE

  • Dating sunggyu ((((;;;;

BLOCKB

  • P.o + facesitting (wild/…//..)
  • zico not enjoying the way jaehyo looks at you so he teaches u a lesson ( even tho it wasnt ur dmn fault)

BAP

  • Au where you have bad social anxiety and himchan takes you back home after an event to comfort you all cute an fluffy
  • dating yongguk

BIGBANG

  • Cuddling GD after him being on tour for months (sweatyau)

MONSTAX

  • Shownu daddy smut (y'all wildin w this daddy shit)
  • Monstax as boyfriends (im doin them alll……but mostly changkyun…mi nvio)

ASTRO

  • Dating mj would include (REQUEST MORE LMAO)

MISC

  • Dating jay park (this…..this is,,,..,,,noo words)

SNSD

  • Snsd reaction to being in love with their girlfriend (◕‿◕✿)
  • taeyeon watching you struggle to get something down the cabinet and she tries to help but fuck shes short as hell too just fluff with two super cute short gf’s

MAMAMOO

  • Hwasa smut (I ain’t gonna fail you y'all you boutta get suffocated by ha thighs)
  • Clingy + needy moonbyul
  • Striptease au w moonbyul but you embarrass yourself like omg no but she into it and y'all fuck

F(X)

  • Krystal smut (not postponed y'all this for me)
  • Fluffy Amber scenario (my boo)

BTOB

  • Ilhoon + facesitting bihhhh

MY OWN IDEAS LMAAOOO

  • ASS EATING SUHO AU
  • Minho name kink as discussed with @xiumindotjpeg where  in he’s not ur bias but he sure as hell gonna fuck you until his name the only one you’re saying
  • Mommy!with exo au where you have a day out with your children (children being your kid + a member)
  • Mingyu + school nurse au where he visits you everyday with his unrequited love that you don’t return until he comes back to work there 2 years later and damn is that mingyu?? Featuring relationship maker lee chan
  • Minghao + a cloudy day in China au where you both find things to do around the house since y'all bored as hell
  • Blind date!au where you’re about to give up but oh hello seokmin comes in and it just so happens his blind date stood him up too
  • Jaebum is your cousins older boyfriend who you’ve been pining for years for and he finally comes around and sees you as a woman and not a little girl and hey you tryna fuck?
  • “I’ll guide you” au where you’re very inexperienced and cute and jeonghan convinces jisoo to take advantage of a great situation
  • Hoshi!theatre au where you take over as his co lead and he’s super salty but wait what the fuck why is he feeling things what is this
  • Wonwoo au where he wants you to stay away from Mingyu because you a highkey hoe but then you seduce him and fuck now he has no choice but to keep coming back pussy too bomb
  • AU WHERE U SUCK THE LIFE OUTTA JUNGKOOK N LEAVE HIM LOOKING LIKE AN EMPTY CAPRI SUN
  • Au where joys the cute girl at the cafe and you go there everyday and draw her until you leave one behind one day and hijinks courtesy of baekhyun ensue
  • Changkyun’s the really emo boy who rides his bike down the block alone all the time until you decide to go outside with just a bikini to check ur mail n holy shit did he just fall
  • Kai + seductress in the club au
im gonna live like tomorrow doesnt exist

Summary: Phil Lester is a famous singer/song writer who happens to never show his face while performing or in public. Dan happens to run into him unknowingly and stuff happens.

a/n: I am a pretty big fan of Sia and I always found it interesting how she never showed her face so i thought it would be cool to write this.. dont know how you guys will like it though? give me feed back. (the title is sia song lyrics fyi it was the only thing i could think of)

“ You have got to be kidding me.” Dan Howell mumbled under his breath. He pushed his way through the busy London streets. It was already freezing cold and it had just started to snow. Dan tucked his hands into the sleeves of his coat, seeing as he forgot his gloves at his flat. Just as he looked down to adjust his sleeves he ran into someone and he felt a liquid seep through his clothes.

“Shit. Shit I’m so sorry. Here let me help you with that.” He heard a voice say. He looked up to see a man holding a crumpled coffee cup, Dan guessed the contents of it were spilled all over his torso. He looked up to the man. He had a scarf covering his mouth, a beanie only showing traces of black hair, and sunglasses. Dan thought wearing sunglasses was quite peculiar seeing how cloudy of a day it was.

“Its fine. I’m only a couple blocks away from my flat I can clean myself-”

“No I insist come with me.” The man interrupted and grabbed Dan’s arm dragging him behind him. They made their way to a small coffee shop. Dan watched as the man dig into his pocket and pull out a key.

“Do you own this place?” Dan questioned.

“No. I have friends who do.”

They entered the small shop and it smelt delicious. It was small and cozy, Dan wondered why he had never been here before. He noticed a  large book shelf in the corner and many cushioned chairs and couches. It almost reminded him of Central Perk from friends, chalk board menus and all.

“Its very nice in here.”

“Thanks.” The man answered. He carried over towels and started to soak up the coffee from Dan’s clothes.  Dan saw he had taken off all of his face coverings and noticed how dashingly beautiful the man was. He had deep blue eyes, an adorable nose, and delicate pale skin that was flushed red from the cold, and from Dan’s staring. The man smiled a bit before it faltered and fell.

“Sorry.” Dan apologized not quite knowing what for.

“No its fine I’m just not quite used to..” The man drifted off, and Dan didn’t bother pushing the subject.  

“I’m Dan by the way.” Just then his phone went off, blasting one of his favorite artists, Phil Lester, newest song.

“You should probably get that.” The man said his smile back and bigger than ever. Dan slipped his phone out of his pocket and saw PJ calling. ‘Pj can wait.’ He thought to himself as he glanced up to the beautiful man in front of him. He rejected the call.

“Not that important.” Dan spoke.

“Can you slip off your jacket so I can dry it?”

“Sure.” He took off his jacket and handed it to the man.

“So you like Phil?” The gorgeous man asked.

“Yeah. He is my favorite artist actually. I quite enjoy him. Do you?” Dan noticed the man smirking.

“I think he is freaky. That whole “never showing his face in public or while performing” is really strange.” Dan felt himself getting really defensive and had to stop himself from yelling at the man.

“He is an amazing artist. Has the most beautiful voice, doesn’t need to show his face. And I like it. I think it makes him more mysterious. Plus, I think its some sort of self confidence issue. He has no need to be self conscious though, hes amazing, and I’m sorry. I’m ranting.”

“You’re right. It is a self confidence issue, major stage fright.” The man stated. Dan was about to question him when he interrupted.

“I’m Phil by the way. Phil Lester.” Dan’s eyes got wide and he felt his jaw drop. His cheeks flushed red. He sat there staring at the man- Phil Lester, he couldn’t believe it.

“Maybe I shouldn’t show people my real face. You seem traumatized.” Phil chuckled.

“I’m just trying to find a scenario in my head where this isn’t the most embarrassing that has ever happen to me.” Dan finally said. “I basically unknowingly told the actual Phil Lester that I am in love with Phil Lester…. nope, still embarrassing.” He heard Phil let out a laugh and Dan couldn’t help but think about how beautiful it sounded.

"Would it make you less embarrassed if I told you I was more than flattered?”

“Probably not?”

“Would it make you less embarrassed if I told you that I was glad you swing for boys so that I could ask you out?”

Dan tried to say something intelligent or something but all that was going through his mind in that moment was: ‘shitshitshitshitfuck Phil Lester Just asked you out. Say something. SAY SOMETHING’  Just as Dan was about to say yes Phil’s phone rang.

“Louise? Whats the problem…..Oh dang…..Yeah I will be right there” Phil hung up his phone. “Sorry I have to go.” He said sheepishly. “I will see you around.”  

Dan had to resist from grabbing onto the black haired boy and never letting go. He watched as he covered up his face and left the coffee shop with a quick wave. Too quick for Dan’s liking. Dan solemnly put on his coat and notice a piece of paper in his pocket. Written in messy handwriting was what had to be Phil’s number and the words ‘call me’ with a heart. Also in his pocket was the key to the coffee shop.

“Sly bastard. He thought of everything.” Dan mumbled to himself as he locked up the coffee shop. Dan didn’t think the smile once left his face on his way to his flat.