i dont know what this meme is im making it up as i go along

anonymous asked:

can you tell me about the bts ships? not just otp's, brotps too!

YESSsssSSS I CAN TALK ABOUT BTS SHIPS ALL DAY FAM

but ill only talk about the ones im familiar with:

1. YOONMIN (yoongi/jimin):

ok holy shit where the FUCK do i start with yoonmin. they’ve been my bts otp since day 1 so i have a LOT TO FUCKING SAY LOL 

first off, refer to this post as to why i started shipping them, they have a LOT of cute fucking moments predebut and its been a painfully beautiful journey ever since 2013

before we jump in we need to talk about how YOONGI WROTE A SONG FOR JIMIN BECAUSE HE ADMIRES HOW HARDWORKING JIMIN IS. IF THAT AINT REAL THEN GET TF OUT OF MY FACE LMAo like where dat song @ tho yoongs

ok i need to chill, but theres more:

like jimin being yoongi’s #1 cheerleader at ISAC lmao look at him cheer his name in front of all the fans and other idols with ZERO shame, and then there’s yoongi pretending like he doesnt hear him #typical

^ TYPICAL YOONGI. this ship is very love-hate. mostly false pretense of hate on yoongi’s end and WAAAY TOO MUCH SHAMELESS LOVIN on jimin’s end BUT we all know yoongi’s putting up a front. like there’s actually so many subtle moments where he reveals how much he cares for jimin and they kill me every time, like this one:

but then right back to pretending like he dont give a fuck lmfao:

ALSO THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST LEGENDARY YOONMIN MOMENTS, THE “YOU KNOW. I KNOW.” MOMENT (explanation here) :

this whole v app broadcast was a yoonmin fest and it was a blessing. jimin got him a sweater for yoongis birthday and they basically confessed on live broadcast that they’re soulmates. ugh im so sensitive about this moment

in summary:

  • yoonmin are polar opposites and that heart-pulling cold/warm dynamic they have is super shippable, thus the reason why they’re one of the most popular ships in this fandom
  •  yoongi puts on a cold exterior and doesn’t really show his emotions. jimin on the other hand is super openly loving towards others, especially yoongi, and its really fucking cute how yoongi reciprocates sometimes
  • the two really do care about each other a lot though and it’s really heart warming to see. also yoongi had jimin rap on his Tony Montana stage and it was everything

there’s tons more but for the sake of room lets move on

2. TAEKOOK (Taehyung/Jungkook)

Keep reading

dating hansol

alrighty im probably gonna add more to this later because im Soft™ and this might have a lot of typos, but here we go.

-first off, he is someone who would want to date his best friend. like, there has to be that level of trust snd respect that only best friends have that he wants in a relationship. he also doesn’t want to feel bad if he is a total goof (which he is) because he knows his best friend would never judge him.

-loves loves loveS holding your hand. it is one of his favorite things because he likes having you close to him and isnt a huge fan of pda (only in public, ill get to that later). he just loves lacing his fingers through yours and rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb. and he loves it even more when you do it to him.

-not a pda person in public, but when its just you two (or you two and one other person (aka seungkwan)) he is ALL OVER YOU (not like that get ya mind out of the gutter). he’ll pull you into his lap or into his chest and will kiss your forehead or your cheek or like bury his face into you neck or vice versa.

-i briefly mentioned it before but vern is just a huuuge goofball. he absolutely loves it when you play along with his antics, so you would find both of you making up stupid dances and dumb songs and stuff likes that. he knows when to get real and when to get serious and when to chill, but until then, he is a goober.

-fav type of dates are the ones (idek if they count as dates??? cute tho) where yall just stay in, you have the vague area to yourselves, and youre just watching a movie or playing video games. these dates have two moods 1) its been a long day so we’re just chillin (in cedar rapids) and everything is quiet. occasional chatting but with low voices. very sleepy. usually watching a movie or tv show. its dark or there are only fairy lights. sometimes you get deep and cry a lil but everything is well. or 2) ENERGY. playing games ir doing stupid commentary on whatever youre watching. there is no chill. you are loud and despite frantic texts from the members telling you to shuhshshshshshh the two of you are just too excited to be together and have all of this energy!!! you need to get it out!!!!!! memes. there are lots of memes. memes of each other, but also just.,,.., memes. dates usually go something like that.

-loves it when his s/o is super passionate about something. it doesn’t completely matter what it is, as long as it is safe and all that, he just loves it when you have something that you really really love.

-would rap for you a lot. both really good, impressive ones that you can tell he worked really hard on, a d ones that the two of you just made up randomly to make each other laugh. however , he would love it even more if you rapped for him (or tried). he doesn’t care if your good or not, just the fact the you want to become a part of and appreciate something he loves so much makes him glow with happiness.

-listening to music. alllllll the time. he seems to be an open minded peson in general, so my guess is that that carries over to his interest in music too. he would listen to anything, kpop, rap, hip hop, classical, techno, lyrical, ballads, soundtracks, you name it. if there is a genre of music you really like, he would want to become interested in it too, so he could appreciate it with you.

-doesnt really go all out with the couple pet names (doesnt do sweetie or princess and stuff) but sticks to the classics like baby and babe. it makes your heart melt.

-one of his favorite activities to do with you is to play video games!! this is just me but i feel like he would prefer coop or single player games rather then online games. he thinks it adorable when you play a game like skyrim, or something of the sort and you die a lot and get frustrated. you pretend to think he is being a bully when he teases you, but he still thinks your the cutest thing in the universe right there and then.

-gets realllllly soft at night. if the two of you are spending the night or something, he wont let you go to sleep until he gushes and tells you how much he loves you at least 1,000 times. times like these just make your heart soar, and they make you soft and then you get all soft and giggly and tell him you love him 5,000 times and it makes him love you even more.

-would literally cry tears of joy if you and his sister got along. and his mom. and his dad. and his cat. he just wants everyone important to him to get along.

-he has said before that the most important thing in a human is respect, but i also feel like honesty is important to him. he would really want you and maybe even expect you to be as honest as possible, both with you to him and him to you. nothing makes him more upset then you keeping something from him, it makes it feel like you dont trust him, which breaks his heart. this is only of the only things i can imagine him ever “fighting” out about (it barely even counts as fighting. it is an argument usually that would very rarely escalate, and when it did, you would both just take some time to yourself and come back together even stronger and more trusting then you were before).

-usually, vernon is all smiles when he is with you, but like everyone else, he has bad days. maybe it was a long day at practice, maybe he didnt get to talk to his mom that day, or maybe he is just sad. we all have those days. in times like these, he just wants to lay there with you, almost always with soft music. more then anything he just wants a hug. a long, really satisfying and comforting hug. he wants to feel protected and loved, which are all things you are capable of. when you are upset he is always there for you, so please be there for him. idol life is hard, and he will need support.

-honestly, i feel like vern is just a total fluff ball. when its just you two, he gets sooooo corny and goofy and it makes you love him even more. when youre with people you know, he goofs off with everyone and helps you feel included, all while holding your hand or wrapping his arm around your waist. when with people you dont know (or like), his arm is wrapped around you still but tighter, his hand never leaves yours, and he is always checking to make sure youre okay.

-SPEAKING OF, this sweetheart is always worried about you being anxious, or uncomfortable, or unhappy. he is always checking on you, and squeezing your hand, and worrying about you. he just wants you to feel safe and happy.

voltron band au

band au bc???? i fucken wanna ok 

_____

  • shiro is the lead singer n he has one of the most velvety voices ever?? and everyone is like holy shit ma n,,, like holy fuck. he used to just sing in choirs and stuff but he eventually put that aside once befriending the rest of the band. his folks back at his small hometown weren’t exactly happy with his choice of music, but they’re proud enough. but not only can he sing, he can play the guitar too. shiro stans are constantly talking about his sharp handsome features along with his muscles. out of the band, hes the most collected of them all but has a bit of a goofy side that the fans freak out over. 
  • keith plays lead guitar and is a fucking beast at it. everyones a fan of keith’s guitar solos. his electric guitar is colored red and is named the Red Paladin. keith has been playing the guitar since age 8 when he was first put into guitar lessons. additionally, keith adds his own vocals at times and sometimes sings solos in songs. keith stans are attracted to him for his emo-like persona and a few jokingly refer to him as gerard way (which keith doesnt mind until the rest of the band begins calling him that too) and a lot of the fans are attracted to his ~mysterious~ personality. despite looking the scariest, hes actually a puppy at heart and is probably the dorkiest of the group 
  • lance plays the bass and plays it like a god. his rhythm is smooth and constant and everyone’s got a thing for his bass solos. he owns a blue bass that he calls the Blue Paladin (a mirror to keith’s guitar). he first self taught himself the guitar at age 12 and then further on taught himself how to play the bass. he too provides vocals and the group all agrees that he harmonizes best with keith. to the fanbase, he is revered as memelord and king of shitpost. hes the one whos constantly dabbing and making awful jokes at concerts. lance stans love him for his charisma and oozing confidence. he is one of the funniest and light hearted of the band. 
  • pidge plays the keyboard and can play at such a fast rate it rivals sonic’s speed (lance’s words). when shes playing the keyboard she is completely in the zone, eyes trained as her fingers glide across her instrument. in between songs at concerts though, shes always ready to provide a joke at the expense of her teammates (all in love ofc). shes also the one in charge of the effects that go on during concerts (aka how lights will go, whats on the monitors, etc). the smartest of the bunch, pidge is also considered the most savage and wont hold anything back. pidge stans love her for her fiery personality and just maybe bc pidge is adorably tiny 
  • hunk plays the drums and is phenomenal. hes always so enthusiastic to play and has the most energy to play during a concert. his beats are the backbone of their songs and as a member is the heart of the band. he began playing the drums at a young age and was always fascinated by music. he lovingly refers to his drum set as the yellow paladin and he insists pidge call her keyboard the green paladin but she finds it ridiculous. he is also the one they depend on to fix their instruments and equipment, seeing as hes rather handy with those things. hunk’s fanbase loves him for his kind personality and humor. along with keith, he too is a bit of a puppy and the fans l ov e it. hes also the most hard working of the band, always the last one to leave the studio bc he just HAS to get this right. 
  • allura is actually a solo artist herself and was the one who discovered them. she saw them playing at one of their small gigs one time and decided that they needed to tour with her. she is the daughter of alfor altea, owner and creator of Altea Records. allura offers the band a recording label there, to which they agree to gladly. as a solo artist, she has a large following. her voice is known in the business for being so powerful with her barely trying. she serves as a mentor to the band and helps as much as she can. 
  • coran is allura’s manager and works for alfor at altea records. as allura’s manager, he also doubles as the band’s manager too. very quirky and a bit of an oddball, coran always has ideas and is the best when it comes to PR. he too is known by the fans as manager and often stars in the band + allura’s social media. this gains coran a few fans that hes awfully proud of and thinks its the best thing in the universe. (he also lowkey totally has a crush on alfor but as if hed ever act on that but in reality alfor is trying his best to make it known to the redhead that his feelings are reciprocated) 
  • um ofc the band’s name is Voltron what did u expect 
  • shiro and keith were the first ones of the band basically. keith convinced shiro that his voice was fucking good as hell man and that he should quit choir and maybe start up something new 
    • they end up meeting pidge, lance, and hunk after performing at some open mic night bc lance decided hed insult the song they performed (which keith wrote) it was eventually settled when lance admitted that shiro’s voice was amazing though and that keith’s guitar playing was pretty good
      • “not too good of course”
    • after a week or so when shiro first learns that the others play instruments, it hits him that theyve been whats missing all along and eventually they all come together and form voltron 
  • despite originally clashing, keith and lance actually make a pretty good team and write some of the best lyrics together 
  • shiro is constantly acting as a buffer for each of them, often at times having to cross out inappropriate lyrics or song choices
    • “for the last time, pidge, we’re not gonna write a song about birds fucking”
    • “its a perfectly good song and you know it" 
  • hunk coming up with the best beats and rhythms and all out of nowhere just because he was randomly tapping his hands against some object 
  • pidge playing pranks on them during concerts and one time steals shiro’s mic when he’s occupied on a different part of the stage 
  • um yeah ofc the fans ship #klance and the two blush and get flustered over it every time its mentioned but they get together eventually bc honestly everyone saw it coming 
  • the top two things people look forward to in meet and greets: touching shiro’s bicep and getting to experience one of hunk’s bear hugs 
  • fans know about hunk’s passion for cooking so they like to tweet him about it. some even go as far as gifting him food and its honestly the sweetest thing ever
    • hunk sends out a personalized thank you tweet to everyone who gives him food
  • keith is constantly being asked by the fans to wear eyeliner
    • emo style bc they already have shiro wearing winged eyeliner
  • the band going through the the internet to see what fans are saying and being simultaneously overwhelmed with happiness and also confused as to what the hell theyre going on about
    • “why are they calling me daddy? am i a fatherly figure?" 
    • ”…im a sinnamon roll”
    • “wait who the fuck just called me a rip off pete wentz”
    • “why are people making so many memes of keith but not me?? the actual memelord??”
    • “someone just called me a cinnamon roll?? thats the most adorable compliment ever"
  • allura constantly having to Stop them from posting awful things on their social media 
    • “shiro i dont think #dicksoutforharambe is the social movement you want your name tagged onto”
    • “but lance said it was for a good cause”
  • everyone in the band realizes that coran is head over heels for alfor and finds it both hilarious and endearing but also sad bc?? hes so oblivious?? its so obvious alfor likes him back smh 
    • except for lance though. he isnt even aware until hunk makes a joke about coran and alfors’ wedding 
  • their fanbase being called paladins bc why not
    • (sorry im not letting it be called quiznaks. i cant let us be called fucks i just cant)
  • band selfies more like “pidge i understand its difficult for you to be seen but you dont have to stand on the table–no dont argue its not safe”
  • pidge can secretly rap hella good and decides to showcase it one time in lance’s snapchat story
    • SHE RAPS NICKI MINAJ’S MONSTER VERSE ONE TIME N IT IS WILD AF
  • lance wont stop making lance bass jokes and no one knows why exactly
  • o god hunk driving all the fans wild when he throws his drum sticks out to the crowd at the end of a concert and is smiling widely in all his sweat filled glory
  • also shiro totally always purposely wears sleeveless shirts at concerts bc Oh Yeah
    • o and also shiro still has a prosthetic arm in this au just saying 
  • hunk and pidge fucking around with the stage equipment and stuff for shits n giggles
    • until allura and shiro find them n tell them to stop
  • one time lance is told to do the opening to one of their songs at a concert and he just strums his bass idly before saying “anyway, here’s wonderwall”
  • oh my god keith answering interviewer’s questions impulsively without thinking
    • “what part are you from?”
    • “my mother’s womb part”
  • they all adopt a black cat as their band mascot (irl they just wanted a cat) named voltron who constantly wears a multi colored sweater (red,blue,yellow,green) which was knitted personally by lance.
  • pls imagine thEm playig THE VOLTRON THEME SONG EVERY BEGINNING OF A CONCERT

,,,,,,,,, b an d a u

kiho!couple au

coughs happy birthday kihyun + @ my nct followers i still love you and i prOMISE I’LL WRITE SOME NCT STUFF LATER ON </3

also hugehugehugehugehugehugehugehughugehugehughuge thank you to @jeongmini bc dear lord i wouldnt even have finished this without her


-softest couple ever

-like fucking murder me with your softness please

-wonho does dumb things so he can see kihyun’s face squish up when he smiles 

-cotton candy hair duo (as of 20.11.16 ;))))))

-wonho’s contact name is probably hoe honestly kihyun has no time for his bullshit

-kihyun’s contact name is probably something cute like “baby boy” or “kihyunnie”

-wonho calls kihyun “baby” and “baby boy” to make him blush leave me alonE  

-they call each other babe a lot but whenever they’re tired they call each other “wonnie” and “kihyunnie”

-one time kihyun got fucking trashed 

-he was drunk out of his mind smh 

-i mean it was his birthday so iT WAS OK

-wonho had a feeling kihyun was gonna drink way more than he could handle so he decided to be sober that night 

-and when they got home, kihyun could barely stand without wonho’s help

-he was wobbling and shit oh my god this kid

-so wonho managed to get them to their room and he staRTED TO TUCK KIHYUN IN OH MY GOSH

-and the entire time kihyun was mumbling on about something wonho couldn’t quite hear

-and when wonho started to leave to get kihyun a glass of water and aspirin for the morning, kihyun grabbed onto his hand and mumbled something before covering his eyes with his free hand

-“what was that babe? i couldn’t hear you”

-kihyun turns even redder than before but wonho pretends not to notice 

-“i want… i want you to stay with me”

-wonho feels his lil heart burst because kihyun’s voice is so small and timid and aHH

-“i mean… i know i look gross and like im about to throw up any second but please?”

-wonho grins and he just walks over to kihyun to give him a kiss on the forehead before he tells him he’ll be right back 

-when he comes back with water and aspirin, kihyun’s like half asleep and he’s in the same position wonho left him in

-and wonho sits on the edge of the bed and kihyun immediately tries to sit up but wonho makes him lay down

-kihyun mumbles something along the lines of “lay down with me please” and wonho realizes he’s so whipped oh my god 

-wonho lays down with him and kihyun envelops him in a koala hug and he manages to drift off like that but right before he falls asleep wonho whispers “goodnight kihyunnie”

-and that brings the bIGGEST DOPIEST SMILE ON KIHYUN’S FACE

-so you know what this fucker replies with 

-“i love you”

-it’s so quiet and faint but wonho hears it anyway and his heart stops because it’s the first time kihyun’s told him he loves him and aHHH

-“tell me you love me in the morning, baby" 

-wonho says that in the softest voice he’s ever heard himself speak and gosh he realizes how in love he is with kihyun

-kihyun likes sneaking in kisses with wonho during the day

-it’ll be quick, subtle kisses on the cheek or something 

-kihyun never kisses wonho’s lips in public

-he’s learned his lesson smh

-the one time he presses a quick kiss to wonho’s lips, wonho pulled him closer and wouldn’t stop kissing him until kihyun ran out of breath and had to push wonho away

-wonho likes it when kihyun’s cheeks become a dusty pink when he’s embarrassed a lot

-which is one of the reasons he likes kissing kihyun until he can’t breathe :))))))) control him

-honestly kihyun probably sits on wonho’s lap when they makeout 

-wonho insists smh

-"it’s not a proper makeout session until you sit on my lap”

-“im going to bite your lip until it bleeds istg wonho”

-“kinky ;)))))))”

-their makeout sessions are wild y'all istg

-wonho always initiates it 

-kihyun could be sitting on the couch playing something on his phone and wonho’ll slowly drag him onto his lap

-and kihyun’ll be like “lol w/e”

-but then wonho’ll start to kiss the back of kihyun’s neck softly and subtly and make him squirm 

-“if you don’t stop doing that i’ll smack you”

-“make me”

-boom ezpz that’s how all their makeout sessions start 

-kihyun’s legs end up on either side of wonho’s body and wonho holds him still by gripping his waist half heartedly

-wonho’s hands never stay there anyway

-kihyun likes tangling his fingers in wonho’s hair and pulling on it occasionally

-wonho has a hair pulling kink confirmed

-honestly kihyun puts his hands in wonho’s hair because he doesn’t know where else to put them

-shy lil baby omg

-wonho always ends up grabbing kihyun’s thighs bc according to @jeongmini “kihyun’s thicc” sO

-whenever kihyun tries to pull away from the kiss wonho doesnt let him

-kihyun has to tug wonho’s head back by gripping his hair

-and wonho always groans which makes kihyun turn pinker than he already was

-after makeout sessions, kihyun’s cheeks are always dusted with a soft pink and he’s always gasping for air

-wonho finds that so cute goD

-wonho probably likes giving him hickies a lot

-just to make him squirm and whimper

-the amount of times the other boys have walked in on them eating each other’s faces is too mANY

-poor changkyun smh

-after that whenever they makeout on the couch, kihyun always mumbles something about the boys seeing them but wonho doesnt give a fuCK BYE

-kihyun in oversized sweaters makes wonho dIE

-thigh highs too probably bYE I WASNT HERE

-im literally like 13 im going to hell

-kihyun probably steals wonho’s clothes and wonho pretends to be mad

-wonho melts whenever kihyun sings

-honestly wonho is so cheesy kihyun wants to stab himself 24/7

-wonho could open his mouth and he’d have that stupid grin on his face every time he’s about to say something cheesy and kihyun would slap a hand over his mouth so quickly like wow ok sonic has competition

-”if you say some dumb pickup line again im going to lock you out of our room and youre gonna have to sleep on the couch”

-”i’ll just sleep with hyungwon”

-”ok you can fiGHT ME RIGHT NOW”

-their height difference isnt even that big but wonho could probably fling kihyun across the room by accident

-he did it like, once bUT IT WASNT ON PURPOSE

-HE DIDNT MEAN TO

-no one knows how it happens

-kihyun has blocked it from his mind

-the only one who remembers it is wonho and if you ask him about it he gets triggered

-”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP HOE”

-”why do i still love you”

-”lol have u seen my abs kihyun”

-kihyun makes sure wonho eats enough

-like, every time they eat together, kihyun gives wonho a major side eye

-”kihyun why are you staring at me like that”

-”*heavy breathing* *sinks into his seat* *whispers* u need to eat more and stay healthy and im worried for your weight”

-”what was that?”

-”*mr krabs meme* i- i wANT YOUR FOOD”

-”oh here lmaO”

-”*pterodactyl screeches* NO DONT GIVE ME YOUR FOOD EAT IT”

-kihyun just wants wonho to be hEALTHY

-ok we’ve always seen that gif of kihyun sitting on wonho’s thighs while he does sit-ups and i 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000% believe it’s just a normal thing that they do

-the first time they did it, wonho said that “it was for motivation”

-kihyun knew it was bullshit but he went with it anyway

-sometimes when wonho gets close enough to kihyun’s face, kihyun’ll kiss him kiLL ME

-”you call that a sit-up my deceased bunny from 5th grade could do a better sit-up than that”

-kihyun is a savage

-”babe dont be like this”

-”my bunny wouldnt use the babe tactic on me, you know why? BECAUSE SHE WASNT A BITCH”

-”ok but your bunny also cant talk”

-”MS WHISKERS LOVED TALKING TO ME”

-wonho ends up kissing kihyun to shut him up

-kihyun pushes him away and says “STOP KISSING ME JUST BECAUSE YOU DONT WANNA PROPERLY DO A SIT-UP”

-wonho likes it when kihyun sings for him

-he likes the way kihyun’s voice is airy and light in the morning

-and kihyun likes the way wonho’s voice is so rough and low in the morning

-wonho stares at kihyun way too often but he never realizes

-kihyun likes falling asleep on top of wonho

-he likes when their stomachs press together and how he can hear wonho’s heartbeat

-and he feels so safe with wonho’s arms around him

-wonho likes taking kihyun’s phone so he can spam his camera roll with selfies

-jokes on him kihyun saves them all for blackmail :))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

-wonho nibbles on kihyun’s cheeks or bites him in random places

-cue kihyun’s screeching to “sTOoOoOooOoOoOoP”

-kihyun is ticklish and wonho takes advantage of that

-whenever wonho tries to go close to kihyun’s neck, kihyun kicks him and runs away

-”dOnT BreATHe oN MY NEcK”

-whenever kihyun falls asleep on wonho, wonho forgets how to breathe and stops moving bc “iM GONNA WAKE HIM UP IF I BREATHE!11!1!!!1!!1!”

-he ends up scooping kihyun up in his arms and tucking him in bed kill me :((((((((((((((

-kihyun takes care of the boys a lot so wonho likes taking care of him in return

-whenever it snows, kihyun acts like a little kiD AHHH

-”wonho!! WONHO LOOK IT’S IMPORTANT”

-”WHAT OH MY GOD”

-”IT’S S N O W I N G”

-whenever the two of them go outside in the winter, kihyun’s cheeks always get red extremely easily

-and whenever it’s really cold, kihyun tends to breathe out from his mouth more often bc his nose is probably stuffy or something

-and it melts wonho’s heart seeing kihyun’s red cheeks and mouth slightly agape like a little kid

-HAND HOLDING IS A MUST

-wonho just really likes the feeling of kihyun’s fingers tangling with his own and gosh oh my gosh he loves him so much

-honestly kihyun probably fell in love with wonho during their no.mercy days

-but wonho had had his eye on kihyun for so much longer

-he was passing by the dance practice room and he heard someone singing from the inside

-and at first he was like “wtf why is someone singing in the dance practice room at this hour it’s almost midnight”

-but all he could think about was how fucking pretty the voice singing was

-so he contemplated whether or not he should stay and listen

-spoiler: he stayed and listened!!1!1!!

-he wanted to find out who the voice belonged to but gOD HE’S SO AWKWARD AND IT’S SO WEIRD

-”hey lol i heard u singing and i think im in love”

-MISS HIM WITH THAT BULLSHIT OMG

-he was too busy roasting himself in his head that he didnt notice that the person inside had opened the door

-”um… can i help you…?”

-WONHO HAD A HEART ATTACK

-wonho started mumbling and stuttering

-”no i… i just… nO” AND THEN HE R A N A W A Y

-kihyun didnt even know what the fuck to think so he shrugged it off

-but whenever they crossed paths during their trainee days, wonho would look at him a second longer and blush bye

-when they met during no.mercy kihyun remembered him immediately

-”hey youre that guy that stalked me in the dance practice room!!”

-”I WASNT STALKING YOU I JUST HAPPENED TO BE PASSING BY AND I LIKED YOUR VOICE”

-”well youre lucky i like your face or i probably wouldve called the cops by now”

-wow ok smooth kihyun smh

-and at first they were just good friends but kihyun started noticing how sweet and gentle and precious wonho really was and fuCK HE WAS FALLING IN LOVE SHOVE HIM IN FRONT OF A BUS

-DANCE PRACTICES THAT CONSIST OF JUST THE TWO OF THEM

-this is getting too long i need to end this but stan monsta x stan talent stan cute babies who dont know how to live properly i love them

(opsYamanakabb!Deidara anon no longer in anon bc i hAVE GROWN TIRED OF BREAKIN DOWN ASKS)

GOSH im SO flattered you liked it so much i mean ..

anyways, i have resurfaced bc… well i thought of another thing? err

.

alright so backing up: on the road so far, inoshikacho plus sai have gone into a long and arduous mission of setting the long past wrongs into rights which means finding YAMANAKA deidara and i dunno actually doing sth about it?? and also somehow they acquired hidan for the trip back ??

so, what ive got is this: dei is probably super uncomfortable?? bc in one hand there is ino wanting to bond??? on the other is cho who is an actual legit cinnamon roll???? and to top it off the other one keeps eyeing him weird???? (shika cannot stop staring omfg and to think theres ppl out there callin him a genius) dei can feel himself becoming defensive!! aggressive defensive!!!! (like obvs the best defense is an attack?? or sth)

and so there is two. dei and hidan actually get into a lot of fights bc they just cant rlly understand each other– i mean w deis thing bein ‘momentary’ whats exactly the point of bein immortal?? where is the fun in that??? (hidan can totally show him the fun in that)

also surprisingly dei and sai get along quite well?? (i mean when hidan isnt hogging sai) they are artistic bros?? in so short a time?? (as the only person w common sense at this point, cho is keepin a careful eye from afar– surely the fact that sai gets along so well w the missing nin is vaguely concerning??)

*BREAK POINT**FORWARD A LOT*

so hidan is just chillin in konoha like ?? there is literally nothin they can do to him to make him care?? he is clearly superior™

anyway, hidan is chillin in konoha and somehow he overhears the true akatsuki plan (or he believes in conspiracy theorist sai so they have a headstart) and he is like outrageously offended!!! WHAT DO YOU FCKIN MEAN I H AVE BEEN WORKIN FOR SOME OTHER GOD?!?!?!! so clearly the only solution is to destroy akatsuki just annihilate everything there is no other option

so hidan goes on the warpath like THOSE FUCKERS THINK THEY ARE IMMORTAL I WILL FUCKING SHOW THEM IMMORTAL

or (fair warning, this is v crack now i mean)

hidan decides to be petty af and grabs sai to make the ultimate plan

(i actually havent watched shippuden soo might be a bit of on the execution for this one buut)

and so they go to the big ass statue and somehow they do magic bullshit fuuinjutsu stuff

and like in the climax of everything w the thing is ready to be activated and everyone is nOOooO

MOTHERFUCKER HIDAN POPS OUT LIKE LAUGHING YOU THOUGHT YOU HAD SEEN THE LAST OF ME BITCHES

and turns out hidan and his sidekick sai changed the thing so instead of liberating that rabbit moon goddess (??) the thing is now set to actually summon THE GREAT JASHIN-SAMA

everyone is speechless?? like ???? actual plot twist

hidan starts the thing

hidan is also bragging bc obvs he would be bragging

n some konoha nin (shika?? naru?? probs naru) turns to sai all what were you thinkin??!?! and sai be like i know it looks bad but– *konoha nin goes to save the day*

but the thing already started right? so they dont make it in time and the thing shakes the grounds shakes everything lights up like a goddamn light show annd–

it just… stops

everything goes back to normal like nothin to see here bruh and….

everyone suddenly becomes 1000% more suspicious bc where the fuck did it all go? 

to turns matters worse hidan starts laughing like a lunatic ?? sai goes to retrieve him– hidan needs his alone time now

and it takes months upon months before people start relaxing and a new meme starts as in jashinists rlly do get you all worked up but?? they just cant deliver amirite (obvs when hidan is not around bc he is still a psycho i mean)

and sai just shakes his head.. he only agreed to help bc he knew nothing would happen like bloodshed war rage and muder.. they are all already in the great era of jashin

(what hidan did was like prolong it for more years upon years to come)

.

maan what a ride

skype part i [h2ovanoss]

“Are you sure you can handle yourself, Jonathan?”

“For the third time, Mother, Yes. I can handle myself. I’m grounded anyways.” Jonathan mumbled the last part, hoping that his mother didn’t hear it. But as always, mothers find out.

“You are grounded. If I hear any funny business from anyone or anything suspicious when your father and I get home, we will move back to North Carolina. Got that?” Jonathan’s mother said sternly, as Jonathan rolled his eyes and nodded sarcastically if that made sense. “Maybe do some homework while you’re at it, son. Haven’t seen you do that in a long time.” Jonathan’s father said it with not much emotion, which left Jonathan confused, not knowing if he was joking or being serious. “I would do my homework, but you know,” Jonathan started, “you banned me from school for two weeks.” Jonathan did actually have homework to finish from those previous weeks, but it’s not like he was going to do that homework anyways. So, he didn’t let that thought occupy his mind. He had much better plans.

“Loosen up, guys. Go to Hawaii without your son. I don’t have anything to contact my friends or anything. You took those away from me too.” Jonathan sassed back. With his phone, PC, every game console he owned, taken away from him; he had plenty of time to waste for thinking about sassy comebacks and quips for, not only his friends, but his parents. Ever since Jonathan confessed to him that he was a flaming bisexual, they haven’t been a very happy and bubbly family like they were before.

“Just do as much shit as you can that doesn’t involve being a faggot, Jonatha-”

“Jon. It’s Jon.” Jonathan growled, his eyes growing a darker shade of blue, making Jonathan’s mother step a bit backwards. And of course, his father not giving any flying fucks.

“Whatever, let’s go, Elizabeth.” my what-so-called father dragged my mother to the car, carrying their luggage with them. I heard the car engine start and tires screeching abruptly on the drive-way. The roaring of their car engine fade away.

I looked out the window and saw mo sight or trail of them. I smirked and immediately ran to my parents’ room and opened their walk-in closet.

“Bottom of the third pile, second row, fifth column.” I whispered to myself, counting each column and pile and row there was until I found it. My laptop.

I laughed, “God, they’re so fucking stupid when it comes to hiding things. Like their failed marriage.” I said, looking at the ‘hidden’ divorce papers under other piles of junk mail.

I went to my room and literally jumped onto the bed and locked my door. I closed my window and locked them so my neighbor doesn’t get suspicious.

I opened the laptop and turned it on, “I’m almost there.” I murmured, putting my password into the blank space.

Once it went to desktop, I didn’t care about my social media, the amount of memes I’ve missed in the past four months, the amount of notifications I have from that one party. I had my priorities.

I double-clicked the logo, clicking his name, then clicking call.

“Jon?”

“Evan! Evan, hi! Oh my god, how long has it been?” I yelled out, but not too loud for my neighbor to hear.

“Dude, you’ve missed so much. The guys have missed you so much. Especially me, baby.” Evan winked, joking the last part. “What did I miss?” I asked excitedly and clapping my hands together, The amount of things I wanted to hear from his angelic voice was making me nervous and— “Everything basically. You probably missed the news that drugs were found it some kid’s locker and they had school lock down for a few days…” Evan went on and on, missing the feeling of comfort and nostalgia, even if its only been two weeks.

Jonathan checked the time, his parents were so suspicious of him that they had his neighbor check on him on 00:30. It was already 23:30. One more hour His mind went back to his best friend, “Tyler and Craig got into a huge fight and one thing lead to another, Daithi tried to stop Tyler, but we all know how that would’ve ended up.”

Jonathan was shocked, “Holy shit, is Daithi okay? Let me guess, black eye and a busted lip?” Evan smirked, “Tyler’s iconic.”

“So, did Craig and Tyler make up?”

Evan chuckled, “Tyler came into school the next day after lunch with a cocky smirk and messed up hair, along with Craig who looked dazed as fuck and limping quite a bit.” Jonathan chuckled as well, “Ah. Make-up sex. In the bathroom too, I salute the two.” Jonathan shook his head, smiling a little bit.

Evan kept talking and talking and talking and fuck, Jonathan couldn;t will away the fact that it was starting to get a little hot. Jonathan was sweating. He couldn’t will away the fact that he was turned on; aroused; horny. He always knew he had some sort of tiny infatuation for the asian, but he never really paid attention to it or Jonathan himself pushed it away. Before Jonathan could even realize, he was already palming himself through his basketball shorts. “It just sucks without you, Jonathan,” Evan sighed.

Not soon after, Evan was still telling stories from how Tyler literally almost fucked Craig during a party to how Brian gave Brock the most deep purple hickey he’s ever seen. “Like, how could someone bite that hard? . . There were teeth marks!” Evan said, running his hand through his own hair. Jonathan always thought when Evan did that with his hair was fucking hot.

Jonathan already slipped his hand into his briefs and started to touch himself, ragged breaths already starting to emit from his throat, trying to hide from Evan the fact that he was jerking off to him. Sure, Jonathan had had lewd dreams about the canasian, but he never thought he’d have enough balls to touch himself while skyping him.

Evan was walking around his own room, looking for something around his room. Jonathan didn’t know what he was looking before because he wasn’t paying attention, for obvious reasons. “Aha!” Evan found whatever he was looking for, and bent down to grab it, and Jonathan could see his best friend’s plump round ass clearly. Jonathan sucked in a breathe. Hoping Evan wouldn’t hear him. What is the circumference of his ass? It’s like, perfectly round. Jonathan thought to himself.

Unfortunately for Jonathan, Evan did hear him and looked back at his camera, walking back with his head cocked to the side. “What’s wrong, bud?” Evan said, and because he was sick—as he said earlier, when Jonathan was actually paying attention— Evan had a husky and sexy voice, like as if he had just woken up.

That alone set Jonathan over the edge, biting his lip to stop the moan from emitting from his mouth. At this point, Jonathan was already jerking himself off. “Jon, why is your camera moving up and do– oh my god.”

Fuck.

Jonathan was having a tsunami of mixed emotions going on in his mind. Lust and embarrassment being the strongest.

“Jon, are you… jerking off?”

Since my master post got a lot of attention i’m going to make one with fun facts on the members! here we go this is gonna be long.

Kim Youngbin (11/23/93)

-Leader
-Visuals
-BEST SMILE IN THE WORLD CUTEST EYE SMILE EVER
-dancer,rapper,choreographer
-he likes to play korean chess
-strict when need be but also very cute and surprisingly funny
-mismatched eyes. Said they were his charm in one of the earlier neon lessons
-sucks at basketball but does that stop him? no
-he’s caring. he scolded hwiyoung in d.o.b once for doing the move not the way he pictured is and then went to comfort him when he cried, saying they’re gonna debut together since they’re all apart of the team.
-he’s an angel and loves his members a lot before they debuted he did everything to make sure they all debut together
-he dabs…a lot…i mean most of them do too but..
-another quote that made me cry was when he was like “I want to debut for the happiness of our 9 member’s families. Let’s succeed with debut since we’ve been struggling and trying hard”
-HE LOVES EVERYONE SO MUCH i love him he’s an angel
-he gets shy and flustered and its so cute??? thanks
-he’s the thrill junkie in the group imo he was always hyped to go on every ride in spectacle fantasy 9
-selfie king thanks 

Kim Inseong (7/12/93)

-eldest member
-VOCALS he has such a sweet voice wow
-Visuals 
-He’s learning english with Jaeyoon and he’s very good at it tbh if he keeps it up he can be fluent in no time 
-he has great taste in movies he recommended three when they did their q&a thing in the fan cafe and i watched one that caught my eye (bc of him) and it was literally one of the best movies meaning wise thank u inseong please recommend more 
-dimples 
-HE CALLS HIMSELF A FENNEC FOX BC HE THINKS HE LOOKS LIKE ON can u say furry…im kidding i love him 
-SMILE!! OK ALL THESE BOYS HAVE PRECIOUS SMILES AND EYE SMILES WE GOTTA PROTECT :// 
-also used the fox filter on snow when they did that video of all of them…using snow filters…self explanatory i guess but yeah
-usually adds cute drawings to his signatures
- really doesnt act like the eldest tbh but he is dont let that fool you 
-hes a happy little baby 
-he’s always next to Zuho and holds hands and HONESTLY they do that for me thanks 

Lee Jaeyoon (8/9/94)

-vocals!! during their hour long v-app he sang and I melted his voice is like honey just like he says 
-VISUALS
-he’s so extra but in a good way
-HE HAS LIKE 3 FANSITES PLEASE STAN HIM HE’S ONE OF THE MOST UNDERRATED MEMBERS WHY? IDK 
-he’s the best at girl group dances in my opinion along with Dawon 
-Learning english with Inseong, his english is also fairly well!!
-amazing body proportions 
-NOSE SCRUNCHES WHEN HE SMILES HARD
-glowing angel
-can be a meme i guess
-he has amazing self confidence i wish i have
-He’s from busan and love to let people know that he’s from Busan
-manly busan man Jaeyoon
-he’s scared of big rides someone needs to protect him 
-he has cute squishy cheeks 
-we need to hear him sing more please

Lee Dawon (7/24/95)

-VOCALS
-visuals 
-was in AOA creams MV as the main man there…the only man in the video but u know what i mean yeah ok 
-he said in one lesson that he strives to be the worlds best vocalist and he’s there ok he’ll get there i believe in him and you should too 
-happy virus and mood maker
-was one of the main love interactions in CYH
-MC SKILLS LIKE I CAN SEE HIM DOING GREAT IN ASC AND VARIANTS OF THAT
-in the one hour v-app thing they had at the very end of it he did a high pitched scream and honestly so relatable 
-always. screaming. 
-but a ball of sunshine even if u don’t stan him u stan him 
-he says he’s a fashion enthusiast i agree 
-the MOST extra member but thats what people love about him and i do too 
-SO FUNNY IDK IF I’VE SAID THIS ALREADY BUT HE’S SO FUNNY
-and flirty tf he knows how to give fanservice y’all Dawon stans are lucky
-he loves eating and i support that 100% he should have his own eating show with inseong ok thanks i’ll petition for that are u guys in?
-….visuals
-he has a soft looking smooth face like tell me ur skin care routine 
-he tries to make everyone happy and comfy even if he’s not happy he’ll be the type to make sure the people around him are
- loves making people laugh stan this sunshine

Baek Juho (7/4/96)

-Stage name Zuho idk why they changed it it’s the same pronunciation but yeah if he’s happy with it so are we
-MY BABY MY WORLD MY ANGEL i love this dude…so much can u tell who i stan..
-visuals…for days
-was one of the main love interactions in CYH
-deep toned rapper 
-his voice is so beautiful like..imagine waking up to his raspy sleepy voice wow sorry
-literally a lyrical genius 
-he writes most of his own raps can you say TALENT? 
-sharp nose is his charming point and he likes to let people know he’s happy with his nose which i love like yes be confident baby 
-people (FNC and members) call him tsundere but i don’t like using that so pretend i didn’t just write that
-A SHY BABY WHO PEOPLE WOULD THINK WOULD BE TOUGH BUT NO HE’S JUST SHY AND CUTE i love
-members say he’s the most boring dsflak
-he trained the longest..6 years along with rowoon
-both him and rowoon where in a FNC show way before NEOZ SCHOOL was born 
-cheekbones!! he has really sharp and strong features
-invented wearing headbands…
-he says he has the broadest shoulders of the group and that he’ll show them off once he’s more comfortable 
-a BTS fan !! i bet he’s excited for their comeback, and excited they get to promote together wow 
-meaningful lyrics 
-the members woke him up once in DOB by dragging him out the hotel room and fed him a piece of bread lfakf
-bc he’s the hardest to wake up that part was so cute 
-just a shy bun whom i’d lay down my life for if he tells me to 


Kim Rowoon (8/7/96)

-VISUALS
-like i know i said everyone is the visual but thats bc they are ok but the title belongs to him if u understand what im trying to say
-VOCALS
-TALLEST MEMBER HE’S 189CM WHICH IS 6′2 TALL WOW!!!
-was one of the main love interactions in CYH
-in CYH he played a baseball player and u can tell how good his proportions are in the uniform wow he can pull off the uniform better than anyone ok 
-he feeds the members and cleans the dorm
-basically the caretaker of the group
-so he’ll be a good husband to whoever he marries !!
-he’s so sweet a literal angel thank u 
-his hight intimidates me he’s a whole foot and inch taller than me he can LITERALLY step on me
-but he’s gentle so there’s no need to be intimidated he’s a gentle giant with a warm heart
-FT islands biggest stan, biggest minhwan stan 
-when he met him in dob he was so cute and flustered
-nice butt but u didn’t hear tht from me 
-he could literally be a model i’m WAITING
-trained the longest with zuho
-alone with cleaning the dorm he also nags the members to clean and put their clothes away. 
-during dob he and two members made a picnic for the group i support
-also accidentally hit chanhee’s nose and he has a nose bleed he felt so bad it’s like a father who was playing with his son i,- 

Yoo Taeyang (2/28/97)

-MY OTHER BABY WHO I’D DIE FOR
-I have a mini playlist on YT with his predebut videos i might make a post abt them bc wow he did that
-his smile is the literal sun? No pun intended with his name his smile is just !!
-dancer !!
-VISUAL
-he choreographs along with youngbin!
-big eyes and is proud of his eyebrows and honestly me too when will i ever
-went to that famous dance school that literally all the best idol dancers went to like zelo 
-usually sings the chorus, or the beginning, his voice is beautiful
-before wanting to sing he played guitar and i think he still does!
-calls himself sexy charisma like ur 6 please 
-loves chanhee
-prolly the biggest chanhee stan next to me bc im chanhee’s certified mother 
-cHANHEE SAID HE RARLEY GETS SLEEP BC HE WORKS THE HARDEST AND THAT MAKES ME SAD like you’re a hardworker you deserve some rest please :(
-his hard work pays off he’s an amazing dancer ?? and singer one of the best honestly he’s just full with passion 
-the selfie with him in the pink sweater is my favorite 
-i think he can beatbox or am i just making that up?
-lmfao like in January people gave him shit bc of his name since taeyang from Big bang has the name like? there’s thousands of taeyangs stfu let this sweet boy live.
-a little shy awkward baby 

Kim Hwiyoung (5/11/99)

-a baby
-visuals
-a little awkward but not really but yes
-he knows he’s handsome y’all he prolly uses that to his advantage
-rapper
-i already said this in youngbins thing but he cried when he got scolded by the leader bc he though youngbin was mad at him :(
-he’s sensitive pls handle with care
-doesn’t look or act like his age? he’s really mature for his age
-there’s a selfie of him sleeping with a kitty…my favorite
-he loves cats
-like so much he used to add a cat face at the end of his signature idk if he still does? 
- can u say Jumin Han
-^ im kidding please
-smile!! 
-in an episode of DOB he volunteered to bungee jump first and the members called him courageous bc he is !! 
-he talked informally to the eldest members in a episode of DOB he really did that nice
-nice arms 
-SOFT
-beat chanhee in arm wrestling he was so proud 

Kang Chanhee (1/17/00)

-MY BABY MY SON MY BEST FRIEND
-cutest nose and smile ever please
-visual
-played sunwoo in signal and was in other dramas as a chil mostly
-when he was little he was friends with moonbin of astro and chanwoo of ikon!!
-with those two they were in an epsiode of star king with DBSK and played mini DBSK
-he’s literally been in the business since childhood thank GOD he debuted he deserves this 
-his goal is to play in a movie!! let him do this please..
-forces the members to be cute. He did that with Youngbin in a DOB episode i love him 
-was one of the main love interactions in CYH
-other than signal he was also in hwajung and to the beautiful you
-has amazing facial expressions on stage 
-i already said this but his nose is so cute :(
-I need to protect him im his #1 mom 
-before the group name change like even before dob he had an interview with a magazine bc of him being in signal, and he said “the other members and myself will try our very best to debut together because that’s our dream” and i cried
- that was before dob so member changes were more speculated 
-every other member is a chanhee stan 
-if u don’t stan him u still stan him bc u gotta? 
-everyone’s son
-since he’s been exposed the most he’s one of the more popular members!!
-he loves chicken and ramen if u buy him chicken he’ll prolly ask u to marry him 
-when he sleeps he kicks off the blanket he’s a baby bean
- he loves to dance and is really good at it! he says he’s lacking but he’s training hard to meet everyone’s expectations please love him 

for your own peace of mind, maybe dont pay too close attention to the lyrics of some christmas songs.

this is the christmas card im sending out. steve didnt know what text i was gonna put behind it when he drew the picture.

(You can get this on redbubble!)

and it turns out that clint, who has been humming christmas carols for weeks now, doesnt actually know any of the real lyrics, and has just been making them up as he goes along. this is his latest masterpiece:

Winter Soldier’s Gunnin’ You Down (To the tune of Santa Claus is Coming to Town)

You better watch out, you better not cry

You’ll probably bleed out, I’m tellin’ you why

Winter Soldier’s gunnin’ you down

He’s got a hit list, he’s starting a fight

He’s clenching his fist, it’s shiny and bright

Winter Soldier’s gunnin’ you down!

He sees you when you’re sleeping

He knows when you’re awake

His aim is really fucking good and he’s gonna assassinate

You better watch out, you better not cry

You’ll probably bleed out, I’m tellin’ you why

Winter Soldier’s gunnin’ you down

He’s yanking out wheels and firing guns

If you were smart you’d probably run

Winter Soldier’s gunning you down!

Winter Soldier’s gunning you down!

clearly-shady-bouquet  asked:

Can you do them reacting to their S/O being good at baking but horrible at cooking?

ofc!! sorry it took so long exams have been kickin my ass

shownu

• u two are baking brownies for the boys since theyve been stressed lately and u wanted to do something nice for them
• shownu watches in awe as u expertly pour in and mix the brown batter in the bowl
• u always had some kinda magic touch when it came to baking, u knew how much sugar and flour to add in and when to add the vanilla extract
• it just made shownu smile bc wow how cute is that ur working ur butt off for some sweet treats for him and his members
• “hey (y/n) i’ll take over the stirring can u make eggs or something? i havent eaten all day”
• u freeze and give him a smile
• “sure”
• u hand him the bowl and walk over to the fridge to grab some eggs. easy enough right?
• u crack the eggs into the pan, not failing to leave some egg shell in the yolk thats starting to sizzle in the pan
• u turn to shownu whos diligently mixing the batter, workin up a sweat
• tbh he looks real good
• hes totally shirtless, wearing grey sweatpants and to top it off, a cute little pink apron that looks like its gonna bust open at the seams
• u lean against the stove, basking in the appearance of this actual adonis in an adorably domestic setting
• unfortunately u totally forget that stoves are hot and pull ur hand away as it stings with heat
• shownu puts the bowl down and rushes over to u, holding ur hands and blowing frantically at them
• “babe are u okay?” he asks worriedly, his eyes watching ur reaction closely to see if ur in any great pain
• u reassure him “im fine” until u hear the beeping of the fire alarm
• “oh my GOD”
• u turn around to see the pan totally covered in SMOKE and shownu switches the stove off
• ur kinda upset that u cant even make eggs for ur boyfriend but shownu just chuckles and kisses ur forehead
• “next time i’ll cook okay?”

wonho

• “baby are u hungry?” wonho comes into ur shared room where ur sitting in bed on ur phone. he wraps his arms around ur waist and nuzzles his nose into ur neck
• u smile at the sensation. “mm kinda? what do u wanna eat?”
• he gives u a knowing smile and u sigh and get up from the mattress
• “ramen?”
• he smiles and takes a hold of ur hand, stroking ur index finger with his thumb
• u know me so well"
• the two of u chase each other to the kitchen and u grab the very familiar plastic bowl labelled shin ramen
• u rip off the lid and unlock the hot water dispenser, filling the bowl to an unsteady level where the water is teetering around the edges. u put the bowl in the microwave and punch in 50 seconds
• all seems well until u hear some popping noises from inside the microwave
• “um. babe”
• “yea?” u ask, too scared to turn around and see what happened inside the microwave
• “did u take out the sauce packet before adding water and putting it in there?”
• “oh my g-”
• BEEP
• wonho moves u out of the way and opens the microwave, his face contorting at the smell of burning plastic and the sight of ramen sauce power all over the inner surface. some soup flowed over the top too
• u laugh nervously, put ur hand over wonhos, and close the microwave. u head over to the fridge and take out a plate
• “how about we eat the macarons i made yesterday?” u give a sheepish smile
• a smile creeps onto his face and a goofy laugh escapes his lips. ur hysterically laughing and he’s bent over his knees, so thoroughly amused by ur antics
• “man i dont know how u do it. but yea i’ll take a macaron” he opens his mouth. u pop one into his mouth and he chews then hums with delight
• “these are so good??? what happened just now? are u the same (y/n) i know and love?”
• u two laugh again and he puts u in a playful headlock and plants kisses on the top of ur head

minhyuk

• u got a text earlier that ur boyfriends gonna come home late so u wanna surprise him with a nice meal
• u can bake a mean cake but ur not too confident about ur cooking abilities
• but u’ve baked minhyuk so many cookies and cakes and cupcakes ur worried for that boys blood sugar
• so after watching 3 youtube tutorials u try to make kimchi stew, one of his favorites
• u roll up ur sleeves and get to work. u throw some broth and vegetables into the pot
• u cut some kimchi then some fishcake some spring onions u get the pork out of the fridge
• u think its going well
• until u get a text from minhyuk that he’s on the way home
• according to ur calculations he was supposed to be coming home late
• shit
• u do some quick math if u boil the stew at maximum heat for 2 minutes u’ll finish in time before minhyuk gets home so u crank that stove up and
• KACHOW the pot overflows
• soup is everywhere, the kimchi is on the floor, ur kitchen looks like a natural disaster
• “honey! where are u???”
• he comes into the kitchen sweaty from practice and ur just on the floor crying next to ur empty pot, food is scattered around the floor
• “oh baby what happened?” he cooes at u and crouches down next to u, wiping ur tears with his thumb
• u barely manage to get a sentence out
• “i-i tried to cook u” u hiccup, “something but e-everything just fell apart”
• he kisses u on the forehead and stands up to grab his phone
• “well i like pizza. how about we order some pizza and we watch kitchen nightmares yea?” u flinch at kitchen nightmares. “okay how about we watch house hunters” u nod frantically and smile
• totally ignore the mess on the floor
• u clean it up eventually dont worry

kihyun

• u made a deal with minhyuk that at the next house party u were gonna cook something to bring and kihyun was gonna bake a cake to bring along with the food u made and in return he was gonna make a video of himself flicking a booger and post it on instagram
• the problem? minhyuk knows u cant cook for shit and kihyun cant bake for shit
• kihyun originally protested saying “he doesn’t want his house to end in flames” but after minhyuk kept egging him on saying he was a wuss, he threw on his apron and started reading martha stewart books
• so u and him are in ur kitchen, face in hands and sitting at the counter
• “why did i agree to this”
• “why did i let u agree to this”
• u sigh and slide off the stool. “i mean i can make like, fried rice right?” kihyun groans. “knowing u it might result in a call to 911” u shoot him a glare. “hey bobby flay at least i know how to bake a cake”
• he scratches his head and gets off the stool. “how about we make this a competition between ourselves. whoever makes the better dish wins”
• “ur on yoo kihyun”
• its like iron chef u two start scrambling around ur kitchen, opening cabinets and packages
• u lift the lid of the rice cooker and groan in frustration as u see a clean, empty container
• kihyun indulges himself in a shrill giggle until it abruptly stops when he’s opened the last cabinet and found no cake mix
• “u’ve got to be kidding me”
• u hover over the grey pot, finally shutting off the faucet when the rice grains look like they’re drowning in tap water
• kihyun’s throwing sugar, flour, and eggs into a bowl, trusting his “chef’s intuition” that he doesn’t need measuring cups for a mere cake
• u throw the soggy rice into the pan and just start adding stuff u think will taste good together in there. zucchini, bits of kale, ketchup, leftover chicken that probably has been sitting in ur fridge for at least 2 weeks
• it smells pretty goddamn awful but when u look over at kihyun u think u have a good shot at winning
• he’s gotten green food coloring all over his hands and t-shirt and the batter’s completely runny
• “how u doin ogre there”
• “im never doing this ever again”

hyungwon

• u two are laying on opposite sides of the couch, sitting up to show each other dog pictures and whatnot
• u see a video on instagram showing u how to make this yummy looking beef over rice thing
• u lean over hyungwons knee, excitedly showing him the video and how u should make it for him
• he gives u this knowing look
• “(y/n) do u remember the last time u cooked something?”
• “no why”
• “i was taking a nap and u tried to make this weird chicken thing u saw on youtube”
• “uh huh”
• “and when i walked into the kitchen”
• “yea?”
• “i have never seen so much fire-”
• u playfully slap him on the thigh, pouting. “i forgot to turn the stove down while it was boiling!!!” u huff, turning away while crossing ur arms
• hyungwon laughs and sits up to ruffle ur hair
• “but u made it up by baking cupcakes to give to the very nice firemen who saved our apartment”
• u giggle and bring ur knees up to ur chin, reminiscing in the time u almost burned down ur entire apartment complex
• hyungwon sits crosslegged facing u, staring at ur face
• “what?”
• “im just wondering how the hell u managed to do that”
• “no cupcakes for u then”
• he whines and the two of u share a laugh and settle back into the sofa to continue laughing at twitter memes

jooheon

• he never fails to send u a text asking if u’ve eaten yet and if ur free, to go out and get lunch together
• its the sweetest thing and u decide u wanna do something nice for him
• so u roll up ur sleeves and make a lunchbox for him. its kinda childish but it seems easy to make and for ur……limited cooking skills, its ideal
• ur in the kitchen, scraping an egg off the pan as it burns to a crisp
• “aw man that was the last egg,” u whine, looking at all the failed prototypes on a plate next to the stove
• u begrudgingly roll up the burnt egg in the lunchbox and set up some lettuce on the side, trying to make it presentable at least
• now time for the Meat
• the last time u cooked meat was when u and jooheon were out eating kbbq and whenever the tongs were in ur hand u’d somehow toss the meat in a way that cooked it. lets say well overdone
• jooheon had to call a worker to get the fire down even tho it was at its lowest heat. nobody on the restaurant knows how u did it
• so yea ur not the best at cooking meat but hey second times the charm
• so u slide the beef into the pan, satisfied with the sizzling sound that came after
• now the hard part. knowing when to flip it so it doesnt slowly burn into charcoal. so u just keep flipping it mindlessly, too scared to let it burn
• the beef is just NOT turning the brown that it usually does when jooheon cooks it and u settle for when the beef is a weird brown, pink, red—u dont even know what color it is but its 12:30pm and jooheons lunch break is about to start
• u shrug as u pack the lunchbox. u made cookies before this mess so
• u drive up to the building complex and climb up the stairs to his studio. u punch in the passcode and pop the door open
• jooheon hears the door click and turns around in his chair, giving u that sweet dimpled smile
• u show him the lunchbox and bag of cookies u’ve been hiding behind ur back and he opens his arms to bring u into a hug
• “how did i get so lucky?” he kisses the top of ur head and sits u down on his lap
• he turns the chair around and u place the lunchbox and the cookie bag on his desk in front of his monitor and open it
• he has to stop himself from laughing, the corners of his lips trembling to rise into a smile. u flick him on the arm, a smile growing on ur own face. “shut up i tried my best!!!!!”
• jooheon kisses ur temple, a small chuckle leaving his lips still dumbfounded by the mess of food in the lunchbox
• “i made cookies?” u suggest
• “yea we can share those” jooheon closes the lunchbox

changkyun

• u guys ate out at this one restaurant that had really good pork stir fry
• so naturally u two went to the internet and searched up recipes to cook at home, inspired by the dish
• after finding a seemingly easy recipe online, u and changkyun head to the kitchen and grab whatevers in ur fridge
• oh by the way its 1 in the morning so theres no supermarkets still open
• it sounded like a good idea at the time
• anyways u two are jus rummaging through ur kitchen, substituting whatever needs to be substituted
• “hey kyun we’re outta sugar”
• “we have lucky charms”
• “that works”
• u and him lay out the shabby ingredients on the counter
• pork? eh leftover hot wings should do
• bok choy? iceberg lettuce thats been sitting in ur fridge for 3 months
• but at least u have soy sauce
• u start choppin up the lettuce, slicin and dicin and ignoring whatever wilted leaves u see bc hey food is food
• changkyun: hey how do i start the stove
• “…….ur kidding right”
• u put down ur knife and walk to the stove, hesitant to turn any knobs
• “um its this one right?”
• u switch on the stove on the inner right corner which seemed fine to u…….until the roll of napkins next to it caught fire
• “HOLY SH-” “HOLY SHIT”
• the fire alarm starts beeping and u freak out and start blowing on it until changkyun shoves his hand into ur face. “DONT BLOW ON IT ITLL GET BIGGER”
• “WHAT DO WE DO THEN”
• luckily ur dating the son of a scientist so he grabs a pot lid from the cabinet underneath and throws it on top of the fire, stopping the flow of oxygen and u hear the sizzle of ur bounty napkins
• u and changkyun breathe out a relieved sigh and u lean on him
• u suggest making cookies tomorrow and changkyun insists on putting lucky charms in them
• u roll ur eyes, “yea yea whatever lets clean up and go to bed”

ok uh. yooran gaming channel au - part 2

@misfireezreal reblogged the ‘yoosung has a gaming channel au’ post and wrote a really cute lil addition that inspired me to add some more ideas to this mess of an au….. and i got really carried away

their addition / reblog post is here !!  tho i’ll also put a screenshot of it under the cut… along with more headcanons/ideas/whatever for the au/scenario

Keep reading

the gangsey dance party

ok listen we’ve already established how it starts out in this post but let me just refresh your memory:

(gay trans boy!ronan, bisexual bigender!adam, pansexual trans boy!gansey, demisexual genderfluid!henry, pansexual transfeminine!noah, demisexual genderfluid!blue)

henry is Bored and starts snooping through everybodys ipod in order to organize a dance party (and theyve also got ahold of some weed; courtesy of cheng two)(everyone has a playlist of latin music as well in their library) and here is what henry finds in everyones music library 

more under the cut :))

Keep reading

first love with jaemin

dO YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING BEING NA JAEMIN’S FIRST LOVE AND HIM BEING YOURS MY HEArT alright before we start this is my first time making something like this so pls be patient with me

• ok this twerp would definitely be the kind to slyly drop a lot of subtle but not so subtle hints that he likes you before y'all started dating

• hints as in I’m talking about lOTS OF SKINSHIP AND BEING SUPER CLOSE AND INTIMATE WITH ONE ANOTHER BUT IM NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT KIND OF INTIMACY dONT GET YOUR PANTIES IN A TWIST YA NASTY

• like for example he’ll tuck your hair to the back of your ears like its nothing and then flashing you his million dollar smile

• or him telling you some cringey pick up line that is worth punching his beautiful face for poor chenle nearly threw up his lunch when he overheard you both

• BUT WHEN HE FINALLY THINKS ITS ABOUT TIME TO CONFESS HIS FEELINGS PROPERLY HE’LL BE THE CLUMSIEST LIL SHIT EVER

• HE BE TRIPPING OVER HIS OWN FEET AS HE MAKES HIS WAY TO YOU OR EVEN FALLING FACE FLAT oN FHE GROUND POOR BABY

• HE STILL TRIES TO BE COOL THO

• donghyuck, jeno and chenle makes sure to film everything down and probably make a meme out of his mishaps

• mark and renjun are probably just there for emotional support

• he’ll probably begin by wiping his sweaty (ew) palms on his trousers and nervously clearing his throat cORNY I KNOW

• you will most probably be like ??!??? at first but then you realise what was going on the second you saw the trash can moved behind jaemin. you knew this was bound to happen so you secretly kept it inside of you knowing too damn well jaemin will appreciate it if you pretend not to know anything for his sake

• this hopeless romantic smh

• “ok so y/n there’s this thing I’ve been trying to tell you all along. this may sound ridiculous but this takes so much courage from the bottom of my heart and the strength of jaehyun and yuta hyung’s fist to knock some senses into me. and if I don’t do this now johnny and ten hyung are going to call me a wimp and I have to buy them pizza later because I proved their point. I–”

• but who the hell said you were good @ keeping your mouth and excitement shut you can’t stand the tension anymore too either so lmaO

• “I like you too jaemin.”

• “pls do not interrupt me y/n”

• before he could say the three little words he’s been dying to say, he took a deep breath but stopped half way, opening his half lid eyes widely after his mind was able to process

• “wait what”

• “SHE SAID SHE LIKES YOU DUMBASS”

• “SHUT THE HELL UP DONGHYUCK”

• “can I come out now???” jisung’s head pops out of the bushes

• long story short jaemin was finally able to claim your heart that day and jisung got ant bites from hiding in the bushes for too long with the bouquet of flowers jaemin planned to give you after his confession

• the dream unit with the exception of jaemin also found their new source of entertainment from the video they got that day

• NOW DATING JAEMIN YES LETS GO ONTO THE DEETS

• NA JAEMIN IS DEFINITELY THE TYPE OF BOYFRIEND WHO WOULD SPOIL YOU WHENEVER

• he’ll get you small lil gifts of whatever reminds you of him

• that hair clip??? ITS CUTE BUY IT FOR Y/N that necklace?? A MUST BUY !! THAT LIMITED EDITION PIKACHU DOLL?? SCREW THAT VIDEO GAME WINWIN HYUNG WANTED HE CAN LIVE WITHOUT LIKE HE DID FOR THE PAST 19 YEARS

• he’d even turn up at your house at 2am with fried chicken if you text him at night saying you’re hungry GOALS YALL

• HES ALSO KIND OF LOWKEY LIKE YOUR 2ND MOM LMAO

• I call him dropping by your classroom during snack breaks/lunch breaks with food with him, knowing so damn well about your horrible habit of skipping on your meals

• he would force you to eat with him or at least take a few bites from the food he specially prepared/bought for you

• cOUGHS HE ONLY BOUGHT/PREPARED YOUR FAVOURITES COUGHS

• and didn’t he say he enjoys cooking in the dorm too?? imAGINE HIS HOME COOKED FOOD MADE WITH HIS LOVE

• I’m crying blood

• AND IF YOU REFUSE IM 999999% SURE HE’LL FEED YOU PERSONALLY

• “say ahh, y/n”

• “jaemin I said I’m not hungry”

• “stop lying through your food deprived mouth and eat!!!”

• “jAEMIN!!”

• “LISTEN IM NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU FINISH THIS LUNCH BOX”

• JAEMIN WOULD ALSO BE KINDA PROTECTIVE BUT NOT CRAZY PROTECTIVE YKNOW

• HE’LL ALWAYS CHECK ON YOU IN BETWEEN TOILET BREAKS BY WALKING PASS YOUR CLASS AND TRYING TO CATCH A GLIMPSE OF YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW

• AND THE SMILE OH NY GSKDNDN THAT SHEEPISH SMILE HE’LL GIVE YOU WHEN YOU TELL HIM TO GO AWAY IN EMBARRASSMENT JSNNDKEBXOEKE

• but lbr it’s either that really cute BF material kind of smile he be giving you through the window or that weird derpy smile he always has when he’s being dumb

• either way you’re embarrassed by this goofball

• and to add on to your embarrassment, he knows that some of your classmates may be watching the two of you so he’d blow kisses/make kissy faces at you

• he just absolutely loves to see you blush because it’s just so cute to him and he loves cute things especially you you’re his favorite cute thing and he wants to keep you by his side forever

• FIRST KISS YES

• YOU CAN NOT FORGET ABOUT FIRST KISS

• AND yALL KISS ON YOUR FIRST DATE TOO OMG SO IMA INCORPORATE BOTH PLS BE PATIENT WITH ME YALL

• because jaemin has been receiving lessons from his hyungs on dating it isn’t surprising that he brought you to the movies on your first date not because it highly suggested by his hyungs…

• you both agreed to meet outside the movie theatre and he was there an hour early and boy was he nervous as heck

• the older members were also there for a little while to prep him up aw how supportive

• sO after giving him half an hour long of prep talk and re-styling his hair (for running through them anxiously mULTIPLE OF TIME) ITS FINALLY TIME

• YOU TURNED UP RIGHT ON TIME AND YOU SAW HIM STANDING THERE OUTSIDE DAZING OFF INTO THE DISTANT

• HE LOOKS SO GOOD JUST STANDING THERE AND YOURE LIKE ‘tF HO W IN THE WORLD DID I END UP WITH HIM BLESS’

• pls excuse me for a moment here oh my god na jaemin is seriously one of the most attractive 16 years olds I’ve ever seen f U CK CALMD DJOWN

• ok lets get back

• IT WAS THEN YOU START TO FEEL THAT WEIRD FEELING IN THE STOMACH LIKE YOURE ABOUT TO THROW UP FROM THE NERVOUSNESS AND ANXIETY BUILDING UP INSIDE YOU

• BUT YOU STILL APPROACHED HIM ANYWAYS FROM BEHIND AND WHEN YOU FINALLY REACH HIM YOU GAVE HIM A LITTLE TAP ON HIS SHOULDERS

• POOR BOY WAS SO STARTLED HE JUMPED A FEW FEET IN THE AIR jk I was just exaggerating

• bUT STILL

• AND WHEN HE TURNED AROUND HIS JAW JUST DROPS THE MOMENT HE LAID HIS EYES ON YOU MAKING YOU BLUSH AND SHIT AND YOU COULDNT LOOK AT HIM IN THE EYES GOD DAMNIT SHDBNDSKDN

• SEEING HOW SHY AND EMBARRASSED YOU ARE BY HIM AND HE JUST LOVES SEEING YOU LIKE THIS ,, YOU BET MY LAST $3 THAT HE’D TEASE THE HECK OUT OF YOU

• “aigoo, my beautiful girlfriend looks even more beautiful than usual tonight. did you dress up especially for me?”

• I want to kms

• you’d just smack his arm and walk away, trying to hide your face. “let’s go buy the tickets before the show starts, you twerp…”

• the smile on his face would just become wider and he’d catch up with you, naturally reaching out for your hand and intertwining them together

• where the fuck did that nervous dipshit go and where the fuck did he find such confidence to become such a cheesy little shit

• jaemin also bought popcorn and drinks for the both of you and being the cheesy lil shit insist y'all share the drink with two straws while giving the excuse “i wouldnt be able to finish mine if we bought two” 

 • “I can buy my share myself” 

 • “nonono it’s too late for that now the movie is about to start and the line for the snacks is now really long lets go babe you don’t wanna miss out the beginning of the movie”

 • he holds your hand and leads you both inside the theatre and to your seats • “what are we watching again” 

 • “the conjuring 2” 

 • TOTALLY NOT TEN AND JOHNNY’S SUGGESTION 

 • “hmm,, ok… wAIT WHAT” 

 • you stared at him wide eyed and jaemin suddenly looked remorseful and he regrets everything especially listening to his hyungs who probably learnt all their “techniques” and “moves” from watching too much corny chick flick and kdrama 

 • “sorry, I should’ve asked you. do you want to leave right now? I can get tickets to see another movie.” 

 • THIS BOY IS LEGIT READY TO GET UP AND GET YOU TICKETS TO WATCH ZOOTOPIA IN THE THEATRE NEXT DOOR 

 • HE WILL DO ANYTHING FOR YOU 

 • but your cheapskate ass just grabs him and pulled him back down in his seat but not letting go of his hand 

 • “its fine jaemin, ive seen the trailer and my friends say it’s pretty good. let’s enjoy this movie shall we? haha.”

• though your face say yes but heart say no, jaemin was reluctant but eventually decided to sit back down when the lights went off

• “but if the movie gets too scary and you dont feel like watching it anymore you can always tell me, ok y/n? we could have dinner early or something, i’ll bring you some place nice.”

• instead of watching in the beginning of the movie, jaemin was watching you the entire time with a stupid smile of his face despite worrying over the fact that you might be scarred for life

• eventually you caught him and you had to forcefully make him stare ahead at the big screen instead. at first he was pretending but soon enough he was immersed in it

• this dipshit istg

• when the climax of the movie came, you knew what was going to happen and you immediately grabbed jaemin’s hand while following your instincts and hid behind his shoulder

• he was caught off guard at first lmao since he was too immersed in the movie that he nearly forgot that hes on a date 

• after realising you had grabbed his hand and possibly squeeze it for as long as the climax part of the movie lasted, he blushed and tries to bite back a smile from forming on his face

• and when he turned to look at you, seeing that you’ve curled up in the seat, ears covered with your other hand and eyes squeezed shut, he was this close into melting into a puddle of goo because you looked so cute and squishy and he just wants to hold you 

• and he did 

• i am trying not to scream as i type this 

• he skillfully wrapped his arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his embrace, stroking your hair as he teases you “aigoo my big baby i told you we should’ve watched something else instead.”

• you both went on to watch the movie like that, you clinging onto him like your life depended on it and him enjoying every second of it and lowkey wishes the movie to be longer

• when the creepy music in the background began to play as the second climax arrive, you were already gripping onto jaemin’s arm. being the perfect boyfriend material he is, he covered your ears. (BASICALLY JUST LIKE THE WAY SUNGJAE DID TO JOYIN WGM WHILE THEY WERE WATCHING A MOVIE I MISS THEM SO MUCH)

• but as soon as it was over (after all that exorcism and shit and everything becomes brighter), you’ll just look up and blush in embarrassment cos jaemin was staring back at you with a smug look on his face tHIS LITTL E SHIT

• you also notice that there are red marks on his arm from where you were grabbing him so you gasped and began apologizing for nearly tearing his arm apart during the movie while gently stroking his arm while rambling on and on about how sorry you are and also complimenting how he’s practically hairless 

• apparently you were rambling on too much that he couldn’t take it??? not in a bad wAY BUT it wasn’t just your rambles that was driving him crazy 

• it was your moving lips

• yes LiPSSSS gIRL YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

• YOU GUESSED IT

• he kissed you 

• to shut you up 

• and to also finally man up and kiss you like how he should’ve 3 weeks ago when you both started dating

• mmMm gotta get me a guy like jaemin A++

• you were too stunned to kiss him back so you just stared at him wide eyed when he pulled away

• “i-what-huh-wait, jaemin-what-” you poor confused child

• “how did you know peach was my favorite flavor.” he wipes the corner of his lips as he said that with a shit eating grin, causing you to turn crimson.

• “what are you kids still doing here? the movie is over; leave.” 

• whoops 

• so basically that was how jaemin found his confidence and that was just only the beginning of this cute relationship and he just adores the heck out of you and loves you to bits you guys are practially engaged in his head and he hopes that not only you’ll be his first love you’ll also be his last iTSNT THAT THE CUTEST THING EVER

• i am crying blooODdd i hope you guys enjoyed this like how i enjoyed torturing myself ㅠㅠ

Dating would be like... | Jungkook Edition

tHIS BABY MEME OK LOVE HIM

  • He be so awkward while asking you out
  • legit would ask one of his hyungs for help
  • and would stumble and stammer over everything
  • until you take pity on the poor kid and just are like,
  • “Kookie. Yes.”
  • Taking selcas that range from super cute
  • to super derpy
  • being unsure about everything but will act like he knows what he’s doing
  • will shyly ask if you can help him in his workout
  • which means he uses you to bench press XD
  • THIS IS WHERE ADMIN KT’S CONTRIBUTION ENDS AND ADMIN HEDGEHOG’S TAKES OVER
  • THIS MUSCLE PIG HELL YEAH
  • sometimes u get a little jealous bc jikook lmao talk about a bromance am i right
  • when u hang out w him the first few times u have the rest of BTS hanging out as well bc they want to make sure ur safe and won’t hurt their baby maknae bc while he is Tough and Large he is also Soft and Sweet and must be protected
  • when they decide ur cool and they accept u  as Jungkook’s S/O they would basically adopt u 
  • Jin would mother over both of u no matter what ur age
  • y’all would double date w Vmin bc they would somehow end up tagging along? even tho u drove separately?
  • CONSTANT TEASING
  • he would make u get up on ur tippy toes to kiss him lmao and then make fun of u for not being able to reach
  • if u got mad at him for not bending down for u he would panic for a second and then be like “hey loser”
  • “what do u waNT NOW-”
  • and he gently cups your cheek and gives u the sweetest kiss ever.
  • u forgive him instantly of course
  • and he has to run away bc he’s still our smol bunny and omg did he actually do that omg omg
  • you walk over n give him a back hug like
  • “aww jungkookie are u blushing??”
  • “NO WHAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT NO” 
  • but u can tell bc the tips of his ears are red lmao
  • cute lil pecks or smOKIN MAKEOUTS U KNOW THAT BOY HAS IT IN HIM
  • u ask him to do ageyo once and he shuts that shit down real fast
  • unless u bribe him w food then prepare for death bc he a QT
  • he’ll always be asking u to play video games w him
  • the 2 of u will sit on the floor, him leaning against the sofa and you sitting between his legs, with his chin resting on your head
  • (he’s low key smelling ur hair once and a while dont say anything okay)
  • he’ll flex his  muscles all the damn time like if ur hugging him he’ll low key flex and ur like…damn…u fit
  • u go with him to work out once and then never again bc neither of u did much working out ;)
  • his back muscles tho omg i need a moment
  • u 2 would be the innocent couple that people r like?? are they really dating?
  • the only reason i say that is bc y’all would roast each other so much 
  • “why are you doing so many hip thrusts??? do u think ur hot shit or something”
  • “Hell yeah i’m hot shit it’s better then being actual shit like someone else i know”
  • “u have 2 seconds to run before i fight you”
  • “please u have the arms of a 2 y/o meanwhile i have the arms of a god i fear nothing”
  • “No kisses for a week.” 
  • ‘wai t wAIT NO ARE YOU SERIOUS JAGI ARE U SERIOUS IM SO RRY”
  • sin time ;)
  •  y'all i keep going back n forth between Dom!Jungkook or Sub!Jungkook like oh my
  • he really could be either I’m p sure he’s a switch
  • he’s probably a sub the first few times y'all have sex like he’s so shy
  • your first time together is so sweet and low-key awkward but lbr who’s first time ISNT awkward??? 
  • maybe he becomes more of a dom the longer u 2 are together
  • i’m a firm believer in the idea that he is a f a n of wall sex like u all could be having a fight and then suddenly ur making out against the wall one of his hands holding u up(bc muscles) and the other one going up your shirt lord help me 
  • not really super kinky but would be willing to try out some MINOR kinks you might have? 
  • call him Oppa doesn’t matter if ur older or younger he will go crazy for it and then u won’t be able to walk for a lil bit and he’s such a smug asshole about it.
  • not really loud?? more of a grunter and a soft moaner when he’s on top but when he’s on the bottom he’s a lil louder w soft gasps and groans
  • TOTALLY AN ASS MAN like u know he’s all about that booty
  • i can’t do this anymore that’s it bye i’m retiring from this job ur killing me u guys
  • y'all would be really sweet n cute together and it would be kind of awkward at first
  • just bc it’s out maknae’s first real relationship but it’s okay we all are awkward at times
  • and even tho sometimes he’s not the best at expressing his emotions he’s more of an actions speak louder then words kind of person and he’s not super good at big romantic gestures but
  • u never have any doubt that he loves u and he loves u in such a pure and wholesome way 
  • tries to get u to dance w him at 1 am when he’s making food for some reason nd u refuse but then he gently grabs your waist and swings around and somehow u end up slow dancing and he rests his forehead on yours 
  • and u 2 just sway there in your own lil world staring into each others eyes
  • (until u smell something burning and it turns out he forgot to set a timer for his food and suddenly ur apartment smells like burnt noodles for a few days)

my heart hurts let me hug this child can he slow his roll and stop tryin to wreck my bias list bye boy

<3 you! ~Admin Hedgehog (and Admin KT who started this for me lololol thanks bae)

Here is the Zola Story Transcribed

written by @zolarmoon on 10/28/2015

Y'all wanna hear a story about why me and this bitch here fell out???????? It’s kind of long but full of suspense

Okay listen up. This story long. So I met this white bitch at hooters. I was her waitress! She came in with this old ass big ass black dude. So you know as a hooters girl we have to talk to our customers. So I sit wit them & we get to talkin & she tells me she dances! So I’m like Oh yes bitch me too! Then she tells me this hulking black man is her sugar daddy. & I’m like oh yes bitch my SD at home. I feel it I feel it. So we vibing over our hoeism or whatever. & we exchange numbers!! & we like “next time u dance hum ima come dance wit you!” & they leave.

So THE NEXT DAY I get a text like “BITCH LETS GO TO FLORIDA!” & I’m like huh??? She’s like “I’m going to dance in Florida, let’s go!!” Now I’m skeptical like DAMN bitch we just met and we already taking hoe trips together???? BUT I had went to FL 2 months prior & made 15K. So lowkey I was down. So I was like “okay I’ll go. Who’s all going & when we leaving.” All this bitch says is “be ready by 8” So I call her like “bitch I SAID who’s all going!” & she says “my boyfriend & our room mate & my room mate has a place in Tampa ” So I’m like ok ok ok. I’ll be ready. So I pack my baddest stripper wear & I’m ready. Now my nigga DID NOT want me to go. He was soooooo hurt. So I had to fuck him calm, & then I left.

Now when I got in the car it was a white boy (her bf) & this hulking black guy (NOT the same one). So I texted her on the slick while in the backseat like “another sugar daddy? U got a type bitch!” & THE BLACL DUDE HAD HER DAMN PHONE!!! So he starts laughing & he goes “I’m using her GPS. no I’m not a SD I’ve known her & her dude for 8 years. We all live together..” So I was like “My bad. Who lives in Tampa?” & black dude (still aint told me his name) goes “my fiance” …so tht was it.

Now we on the road. The ride was cool. We all talking. Laughing. Blasting Gucci. I take a nap & wake up in FL…the black guy goes “Ima put y'all in a room then take yall to the club while I go visit my girl. Jarett (her white bf) will be at the room if y'all need a ride after work” ..sounds fair. BUT we don’t pull up to the four seasons bitch. We pull up to a raggedy ass motel. So I said REAL QUICK “I’m not staying here Hun” THERE WERE LITERAL PROSTITUTES STANDING WITH THEIR PIMPS OUTSIDE. I SWEAR TO GOD. I said “I have $. I can get my own room. It’s fine” so jessica (the white bitch) pulls me to the side & is like “we gone be at the club all night. This room for Jarrett not us! dnt even trip” So I was like yea bitch okay. But trust I am NOT laying my head here. So we leave our shit at the motel wit Jarrett & head to the club.

So we working. It was king of slow (it was early Friday night) the club had HELLA rules which I’m not use to (Ima full nude typa bitch). But this club require pasties & boy shorts & all this other shit..whatever. So after making about $800, I was ready to go. She was talking to some dude, tryna talk him out his wallet & they exchanged numbers. So I was like “call ur man. I’m ready!” ..she calls The black dude. I’m like ummm that’s not ur man but okay. So I pull her to the side before he pulled up like “wassup wit ur roommate?” And she was like we’re really close. Before I met Jarrett I was with him. He was taking care of me. I was like OHHH well I don’t need that. “Taking care of Me” in stripper language means that was her pimp. So I was like does Jarrett know? & she goes “of course not” …strike 1.

So then she goes “I didn’t make anything tonight. What u make because he’s gna ask” ..I said “umm that’s not yalls business Jess!” ..chill. So he pulls up & AS SOON as we get in he goes “what y'all make” we said at the same time “nothing” …so he goes damn my girl said she had a bad night too. We finna go pick her up. (His fiance who lives down here) ..we pick her up & he goes “nobody made shit. Y'all wanna trap?” Trap in stripper lingo means trick. So jessica goes “hell yea! U got some clients” im in the back on mute. He was like “u can get some!” So jess is like “yea i need to trap. But jarret is at the room!” & he goes “i wasnt putting yall in thay shit hole tht was for him not y'all"

Im still quiet….we pull up to a nice ass hotel on the other side of town & he goes “ill get the clients together & text yall off this” … He handed her a trap phone. So i am mind blown at this point. . So then we get to the room. Nice as fuck. Just me & jess & i start GOIN OFF. “BITCH U GOT ME FUCKED UP. IM NOT ABOUT TO PLAY WIT U HO. IM GOIN HOME” so she starts cryin & shes like “i didn’t wanna take this trip alone. Please dont leave me. I would be so scared alone” shes fucking sobbing. Im like oooommmmgggggg really?! Now im feeling bad for the ho. She goes “u can just check the guys in, he’s not gna force u to trap” i said “OH BITCH I KNOW HE NOT I KILL DEAD ASS KILL YALL” verbatim. So she cleans herself up & theres a knock at the door…i open the door & some fat white man goes “im here for the white girl”…. So I check his pockets, take his wallet & let him in…they start fucking RIGHT on the bed next to me. It was a fucking mess. A MESS.

So when they finished he gave her $100. I said “jess, u sellin puss for $100???? Pussy is worth thousands. U trippin” she goes “i dont. make the prices. The prices are already discussed before they come in. So i was like bitch no. If u gone do this. Do it right…. So i took some pics of her & put em on backpage. Along with a the trap phone # wit a MINIMUM of $500. The phone starts BLOWIN UP!!! I was like “se bitch. I got u a nigga comin up RIGHT NOW giving $500 for 15 mins” …he comes, i check him they get it in, he leaves. We are doing this ALL NIGHT!!! She fucked about 20 dudes and her sorry ass pimp only sent 3 of them

..so around 6am JARRET CALLS. She answers on speaker & he is going OFF!!!“WHERE TF ARE U & ZOLA?! The club BEEN CLOSED!” she goes “we went 2 another club cus it was slow” So im googling 24h clubs (FL has a few) tryna help her lie & he is NOT having it. Hes LIVID. He goes “if u went home wit a dude ur DEAD!” So he asks to speak to ME?! I was likr maaannn ima end up killin these crazy white niggas tonight. So he starts cursing ME out!!! “Where are yall! I kno she’s lying!! Dont be a ho like her zola!!” I said “i PROMISE you, im not” ..he hangs up on me & that was it. We didnt hear from him for the trst of the night. . We fall asleep.

A fee hours later the black dude (I STILL DONT KNOW HIS NAME) comes up. He’s like “how much u make lastnight” jess goes “5,500” i was like WTF WHY SHE TELLIN THE TRUTH?!?! I pimped her NOT HIM!!!! So he goes “wtf how? Thats good but i only sent u 3 clients” she goes “zola made me a backpage” i was like WOOOWOWOWOWOWOOWOW. here we go…. So he goes “u can do my job better than me?” I said “i was just helping her out. Irdc. Ur clients were cheap” he started laughing…. He goes “give me the money” she gave him ALL OF IT. & he goes “thanks zola. U a real one” & throws $500 at me….. I put that shit right in my bra. Tf. & jess goes, what about me? & he said “u owe me rent jess. U haven’t paid in months” i was like damnnnn.

So we leave & head to jarret & the ragedy motel. Cus our shit was there. As we pull up, jarrett chillin outside smoking weed wit some dude. PAY ATTENTION HERE!! We get out & walk up to them & jarrett goes “here they go” the pimp goes “HERE WHO GO LIL NIGGA, WHO DIS?!” Jarrett starts laughing & was like “he was asking me who i was here wit & i said my girl & her friends thats all. Chill out” … The guy jarrett was talkin to laughs & goes “ill catch u later man. Nice meeting u.” & leaves. He was a black guy wit dreads. A FL nigga. So we all go up to the room & the pimp is going OFF on jarrett. “U dont knoe these niggas!! I can’t believe u told him 2 bitches in here!!” & jarret goes “he asked why i was out here mad lastnight. All i said was my girl went to work wit her friend & i aint want her to!” Now the pimp SCREAMING “SO THAT NIGGA KNO ITS MONEY UP HERE NOW?! HELL NO. WE GOTTA GO!! NOW” me and jess are like . So we pack our shit & head out.

We went to a nicer hotel about 20 minutes away. So the pimp was like “zola keep a eye on jarrett!” I was like oh shit he den promoted me to look out & shit…so he leaves (to go back to his fiance at home) & jarret & jess start arguing. He was like “i know u was trappin jess. I saw the backpage add ho” and he shows her a screenshot..i was like OH SHIT. HERE WE GOOOO. So he starts cryin like a bitch. I was like wow. Hes like “i thought u were done wit this. I didnt come to FL for this. U messy”… Then he turns 2 me & goes “this what u came here for zola?!” I said “HELL NA jarret she lowkey set me up. Im not fuckin wit yall after this” He goes “wow u even set up ur friend. U such a ho” so they arguing for hours.

I leave & go down to the pool. I mean, i am in florida ! So MY MAN calls me! I lied & said everything was okay. I didnt want him worrying. I had a nice dinner & then the pimp calls the trap phone. I answer & hes like “since u a maadam & shit, do that shit again tonight. But set up outcalls only cus this hotel 2 nice 2 trap out of” I was like cool. I gotchu. Especially for another $500. So i go up to the room & told jess to get ready. Jarrett goes WTF AGAIN BITCH NO!!!! I said “jarrett calm down. Please” this white nigga starts PUNCHING HIMSELF!!!! Like crazy people do dawg!! I was like OH HELLLL NAWLLL. He goes “if u do this again jess. I will kill myself. I love u 2 much”..I was like this nigga lost in the sauce & his bitch lost in the game. So i said “jarret sit THE FUCK down. Jess come on so i can take some pics it’s already 10oclock. Yall playin” so i make her a fresh ad.

We come out the bathroom (i did her hair & makeup & shit) & jarret goes “everybody knows you a ho now. Fuck u. I wanna go home!” I said HUH? He throws his phone at her and its HER FACEBOOK!!! A status of BOTH ads!!!!! HER MOM IS ON THERE GOIN OFFFFFF in the comments!!! Jessica starts BAWLING!! “Omg. My mom had my daughter this week! How could u!! She on the floor literally breaking down” …i was like . So jessica calls the pimp & tells “JARRETT JUST PUT EVERYTHING ON FACEBOOK. MY WHOLR FAMILY SEES!” The pimp goes “I TOLD ZO TO WATCH HIM!!!” LITERALLY 5 mins later its the pimp BANGING at our door. He comes in wit his fiance this time. & snatches jarrett up by the neck. He wasted NO TIME!! He goes “i should really kill yo ass.” Jarrett is dangling off the ground crying “please dont please” ..lowkey im cryin. The fiance pulls out a handgun yall!!! She goes “u want to bae or what? Fuck him. He did OUR girl so wrong” i was like OH MY FUCKING GOD!

So now jess steps in “shes like please dont. Just beat his ass Z” i was like (oh his name z? Okay. Got it) so he puts him down…. Z goes. Naw i am gone kill his manhood though. . And he sits on the bed next to his fiance…he goes “sit in front of me jarrett”….. He does…still crying. He goes “delete the post. And give me ur phone” …he did..then he goes “come here jess” …i was so lost. His FIANCE unbuckled his pants and jess gets on her knees & starts sucking his dick IN FRONT OF JARRET AND I !!!!!! I was like YOOOOOOOOOO. He then gets up…and starts fucking jess from the back…jarret just sitting there…im standin wit my mouth to the FLOOR!!! The fiance right next to them wit a gun in her lap..i was like damnnnnn…

So then he gets up & says “go clean up jess. U gotta work” He looks at jarret & says “any questions?” Jarret says “i wanna go home”  i laughed out loud. I couldnt help it.. & z goes “na. Ima spend the night wit my girl so YOU gone take jess to her outcalls.” I was like DAMNNNNNNNNNNNN!!! Thats fucked bro. He goes “zola got the clients & addresses so yall can take her” & him & his fiance leave….the room is silent for the next 30mins. Swear. The first client calls & says he ready….so jarrett takes us. Z left a handgun but told me not to tell them. He slid it to me on the slick. He texted the trap phone like “im trusting u wit my bitch zola. If anything goes left. Use it” i was like WHAT?! NIGGA I CANT!!!

So anyway, jarrett took us to about 4 clients & then the phone was slow. Me & jarrett were in the car together while she was workin so we. Starting haviny deep convo. He really wasnt a bad dude. But he was bipolar. VERY bipolar…so I understood his outburst a little more. So we head back to the hotel & i flget this one last call late af. & the client says “i got 5,000 but i want 2 bitches” i said “oh sorry we. only have 1.” The client goes “well i got 2,000 for 1 but its 4 dudes..& we only do incalls” i was like wow. Whut?? So i text z & told him. He was like “hell yea, tell him come on.” So i set it up. Then last min the client goes “actually; out call is fine” & gives me a address. So we get in the car & head to the address….jess goes “its 4 of them can u just wait in the hall please” i was like bitch iight cmon.

So we head up to the room number they gave & jess knocks. A dude goes “who is it” & she says “incall” the door FLINGS OPEN FAST AS FUCK. AND TWO BIG BLACK DUDES SNATCHED JESS!!!!! Bitch….i ran so got damn fast i couldnt even see straight. I was OUT!!! Fuck that. I run out and THE CAR IS GONE!!! Im screaming “JARRETT!!!JARRETTT!!” This fool gone. So i call him, STILL RUNING & he like “yall done?!” I said “BITCH Z TOLD U TO NEVER LEAVE US!! WHERE ARE U!!” Hes like “im at the gas station. I was thirsty. I though she was gone be a min” Im STILL RUNNING. lmfaooo. Dont know WHERE im going. Im like “they snatched her dude!! COME GET ME. IM CALLIN THE POLICE!!!”

He pulls up a minute later & is like “dont call the police. Call z” i was like “z gone BEAT EVERYBODY ASS!! YOU WASNT SUPPOSED TO LEAVE!” & he’s like “well YOU have the gun. If u call the cops u done too!” I was like shit. U right. So I called z & told him what happened! Z IS LIVID!!! and this deep african accent comes out!! I couldnt even understand him on the phone. I was like maaaannnnn. We dead bro. So z pulls up & is like “let’s go..” I said “ummm ima stay here. Yall go” he goes “IM NOT IN THE MOOD RN. COME TF ON!!!!” So we all go. Me & jarrett on the side of the hall where u cant see & z knocks on the door! ..a man goes “who is it” z goes “where my bitch man?!” Jessica SCREAMS. & the voice says “aint no bitch in here bruh” i was like oh. My. God…z goes “open the door” ….guess who opens the door. THE NIGGA WIT DREADS THAT JARRETT WAS SMOKIN WIT AT THE RUN DOWN MOTEL!!!!!!!!!

I WAS LIKE YOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! So he goes “come in & check.” To z. Z motioned for us to stay hidden. THANK GOD. So he goes in the room & dread head there by himself rn. Z sits on the bed wit his strap out & goes “where she at man?” Dreads goes “well since she wants to steal work frm my girls. She clearly wants to be here wit us….(we still dont see jess) so z goes to the closet and bust the door in & she in there. Tied up. Knocked tf out. Dreads goes "i got 20K for her right now man & all is forgiven” z said “we made more then 20k this weekend alone. Get outta here!” So dreads goes “my dudes downstairs not gone just let u walk out wit her like that” & z said “we’ll see” …mind u i can barely see. Im around the corner. So i just hear everything…

next thing i know i hear some shuffling & a gun goes off..once again I TAKE OFF. But i took off down the hall threw the back!! Jarrett wasnt far behind & then we look behind us & z is runnin too wit jess over his shoulder. He throws jess in the car & hops in the drivers seat! I hopped in wit him & jarret hopped in the other car & we got the fuck ON. Im cryin. I said “wtf happened?!” He goes “that nigga reached for his piece. I shot him in the face man” i was like OHHHMMAAAGAWDDD. We got back to our hotel, packed our shit & checked out.

We went to z and his fiances condo…nice as FUCK by the way.. Jess is up now & she tells us what happend. Apparently they recognized her from the motel & set her up (clearly) & once they snatched her. They told her to trap for them & she said no. So they beat her ass….thats what z interrupted when he knocked so they knocked her out…. I was like…..I REALLY gotta go home yall. Sorry to kill the mood but i cant take nomore of this. Jarrett was like “same” Z’s fiance was in the kitchen counting money dawg. Just like a rich ho. So z was like “everybody get some sleep. I gotta get rid of this” (Talkin about the gun) so he leaves…we all try to get some sleep.

The next morning he comes in wit tickets for me & jarrett. Jarrett goes “im not leaving jess here. Not after last night. She has a daughter & needs to come home” z was like “na we making money” I was like wooooww wit a black eye & busted lip & some FL niggas looking for yall u STILL tryna trap? Crazy. I was like “WELL IM READY!” Jess goes “itll be ok jarrett. I’ll be home in 3 days” jarrett started wit that punching himself shit again…i was like mannn. Here we go. Jarrett goes “come with me or im killing myself” z was like “ugh. Not this shit again. Ill be in the car. Yall 2 hurry up!”

So jarrett is literally breaking down. U ever seen someone hysterically crying? Its intense. & jess tryna calm him. . Im at the door ready. Jarrett randomly stops crying. Instantly. Like some movie shit. & goes “so u arent comin?!” Jess said “no jarrett. I cant” this nigga jarret. RUNS TOWARDS THEIR BALCONY & JUMPS!! I swear to GOD. bible. He fucking jumped. I screamed SO LOUD my heart stopped. Jess runs towards the balcony & this nigga jarrett was hanging. He didn’t fall all the way. He was stuck by his pants. THANK GOD!!!! We were only on the 4th floor but he still wouldve died. It was a good drop. So jess is helping him & i call z lmfaoo. Still crying. I was like “jarrett is stuck. He tried to jump off ur balcony” z was like “WHAT IS WRONG WIT THIS NIGGA!! FAMILIES LIVE HERE BRO WTF”

So z came up, helped get him. Slapped the fuck out of him (literally) & physically guided him to the car…jess comes out & goes. “I swear I didn’t set u up Zola. I never intended for u to trap. Thats why u didnt! I hope we can be friends after” . I looked at her like she wasn’t speaking English & i said “im not gone beat yo ass rn bcus u already in bad shape. But i better not ever see or hear from you again” & she walked away….z LITERALLY buckled jarretts seat belt lmfao. & we went to the airport.. Bare with me. It’s almost over.

When we landed in Detroit my man picked us up. We both looked HORRIBLE. so washed up & tired. My man was like “who is this white boy & wats wrong wit yall” i said “babe. Neither of us r the same. Just tak him 2 his car & tak me home” We drop jarrett off & on the way home i told him everything. He couldnt even speak honestly. Check this out, this the last 4 tweets.

I get a collect call 4 days later from a jail in LAS VEGAS! It’s JESSICA! She goes “we got caught trappin in vegas & we all got arrested” I said “oh. Why u callin me?” She goes “z was wanted for kidnapping 15 underage girls & is linked to 6 murders including FL” I said “Florida? Muder? U have the wrong number!” She screams “ASK JARRETT TO BAIL ME OUT, He wont answer my collect call” I said “JARRETT??? U really have the wrong number” i hung up & called jarrett. He goes “yea i heard. Its on the news. Hes a huge trafficker” I found out later that jessica & his fiance played victim & said they were forced & z who’s name i cant pronounce was a african man & was. Wanted literally everywhere. He got sentenced to life & i hear jess is back in Detroit wit her mom & baby…. And thats the end of that. If u stuck wit that whole story you are hilarious lol.

anonymous asked:

im sorry if youve been asked this before but do you have like a link to a btob primer?? im new and im looking to see where to start first

yo hello there little butterfly first of all welcome to the fam you are about to embark on an once in a lifetime journey with no other than the seven meme™ boys… ofc i do (here) shout out to whoever made and update super detail btob primer and update this, you the mvp 💖with that being said, you come to auntie nellie and you are overwhelmed by the general weirdness of btob dont worry auntie got your back here is some must watch videos of btob 

IMPORTANT VIDEOS OF BTOB

  • btob cool man i have been saying this forever

EUNKWANG

MINHYUK

CHANGSUB

HYUNSIK

PENIEL

ILHOON

SUNGJAE

that’s it for today since i have an essay due in a few hours and i have been shoving brownies after brownies into my mouth but hmu when you finish watching all of these, these are just the starter pack…. btob didn’t use insane as their debut track for nothing they are a mess a beautiful talented pure unproblematic lovely mess 

Originally posted by busybeingamelody

VLD MAGICAL GIRLS AU!!

So I had a weird idea one day in a McDonalds so i decided to write all of it down (im going to draw content for it later on 👌👌🔥🔥)

Heads up if you’re uncomfortable with cisswap AUs because this AU is definitely one
(and unnecessary cursing im sorry i have no filter)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Ok I don't really know if you take requests/suggestions and it's TOTALLY fine if you ignore this but!! I thought I'd give it a shot lmao. Consider this: baseball!bangtan. Like, In the format of your college au. I just feel like each of the members would fit in a certain position and I just can't think of anyone else's bulleted au's that could do it justice!! But anyway, if it's not your cup of tea, just know I'm weak for college!bangtan. Very weak. Luv u

i dont think i know enough about just baseball, so i kind of took this request and did a mini sports!bangtan au……if that’s ok ^^

Namjoon: cycling~

  • cyclist!namjoon loves doing super long races without mountains just long long road races where he can just buckle down on his bike and go as fast as possible 
  • like he has the long legs for it so you know
  • likes cycling because no one is talking to him, its a one man thing and like when he’s in the zone like he feels free
  • you meet him because you’re at the bike shop to fix your brakes and you see this tall lanky guy come in holding this beautiful sleek bike over his shoulder and you’re like wow,,,,,,,so pretty @ the bike
  • and namjoon’s like ???? im sorry but did you just call me pretty?? and you’re like wHA no i meant your bike it’s so pretty and slender 
  • and he’s like why thank you,,, and gets proud because complimenting his bike = complimenting him basically in his head
  • and you two talk about bikes and good places to go out for a ride in your city and like your brakes get fixed and namjoons like wow your bikes nice too
  • and you’re like ahh thank you 
  • and somehow you two bond over your love for bikes and namjoon’s like ,,,,,,,, if you want do you wanna,,,,,,,,,have a date.,,,,,,,with out bikes like go out for a ride i can show you this long road near this river it doesn’t have to be a daTE dATE if that’s weird it’s up to you um you should bring a helmet though you know safety first
  • he blabbers because he’s shy but it’s cute hehe

Jimin: baseball~ 

  • is a pitcher on his league and it’s cute because like everyones like,,,,,,arent you kinda small dude
  • and jimin’s like what? small? excuse me? say that to my face? come here? say it to my f-
  • and like his height doesn’t matter his pitches are all like high speed and like no one can ever even hit them it’s alway strikes and he’s known as 
  • park ‘fastball’ jimin
  • you meet him because you work at the stadium where his team practices and you just sell hotdogs and drinks at this lil stand but jimin has had a crush on you for aGES and everyone on the league knows and keeps trying to get him to talk to you
  • and he’s only managed to like go over and stutter out an order for some hotdogs and then run away red in the face
  • until you’re like “hey!! i know you, you’re …..fastball right?”
  • and jimin’s like oh my god you said my name…..well my nickname…..my name……….
  • and he’s like ,,,,, “Y-yeaH it’s ,,,, a name the guys gave me it’s nothing special.”
  • and you’re like jokingly like “you should let me see if i can hit one of your famous pitches hehe” and jimin like perks up like “if you want!!!!! it can……it can be …..a………….da- dat- dateeeeee DANG This HOT DOG IS HOT GOTTA GO”

Taehyung & Hoseok: beach volleyball ~ 

  • literally spend 70% of their time on the court being Memes 
  • as in they don’t even play with a strategy, they’re just having fun digging their toes into the sand and taehyung wearing his eyeglasses on the back of his head while hoseok tries to balance the volleyball on his head
  • the team they’re facing is just like …….what is going on 
  • have a handshake before playing a match that takes like 5 min the ref is like oh my GOD stOP
  • turns out you’re the referee for one of their games and literally instead of i dont know playing and paying attention taehyung thinks you’re so cute he like tries to spike the ball and turns to you like “iM cool right, how many points for coolness ref (-;” and you’re like “one. it’s one point.”
  • hoseok thinks you’re cute too and he just gets distracted trying to sneak peeks at you that the ball bounces off his head but makes it over the net anyway and taehyung’s like holy Shit 
  • both of them use corny volleyball pick up lines on you
  • taehyung: “you’ve really SPIKED up my heartbeat with your cute face….”
  • hoseok: “wow you really make my heart do a DIVE if you know what i mean……”

Jungkook: wrestling ~

  • looks tall and sorta skinny from far away but upon closer inspection that. is. Wrong
  • he can body slam someone but he also enjoys watching naruto while drinking capri sun and eating chicken nuggets so
  • is actually really sweet before competitions like he’s all smiley and greets the other wrestlers with his childish smile but then in the ring he’s DEATHKOOK
  • you know jungkook because you go to the same gym but you’re always just like “oh he’s that kid that runs like 5032 miles on the treadmill”  but then one day you see him benchpressing like 250 pounds and you’re like Wait
  • and jungkook is like looking for someone to spot him and he asks you and you’re like,,,,,,,,,i can but if you drop that thing i can’t actually help you and he’s like it’s fine!!! 250 is nothing and you’re like oh my god how
  • and while you’re like spotting him jungkook is like whistling along to the theme song of some anime and you’re like …….. he’s twelve but he has the power of a horse
  • and jungkooks like smiling at you, sweaty and looking all cute like “hey, i did like ten sets isn’t that cool!!!!!” and you’re like this kid has the power to Destroy yet he is…….Soft? 

Yoongi: surfing ~

  • wears the shark tooth necklace ok for the aesthetic 
  • got into surfing because he was like “it’s just standing on a board in the middle of the ocean. it’s perfect.” and hoseok was like “yoongi,,,,it’s more than just th-” and yoongi was like shh
  • is actually super good and can even do tricks on the board and everyone’s pretty impressed considering that yoongi is impatient with anything that deals w physical strength
  • yoongi in hawaiian print board shorts
  • you’re on beach one day and you see this person sleeping and like slowly they’re turning red and you’re like ……. this person didn’t put on sunscreen did they
  • so you shake yoongi’s shoulder and he groggily gets up and is like what huh and you’re like my dude you can’t sleep on the beach without sunscreen on here use mine
  • and yoongi is like oh,,,thank you,,,,
  • and it’s cute he’s kind of caught of guard and clams up around you because you’re cute and whatnot and he’s like “thanks for saving me from becoming a fried lobster” and you’re like “you can thank me by taking me out for lobster, how does that sound?” and yoongi is like oH i mean YES cowabunga 

Jin: archery ~ 

  • “it’s a royal sport. ive got the face of a prince, so like duh.”
  • jin won’t admit he actually got into archery after dressing up as robin hood for halloween for like three years straight as a kid
  • is always the best dressed one at archery competitions like other people show up in casual clothes but jin puts on like a princely looking top with ruffles on the collar and the rest of bts watching him is like he’s so Extra
  • but like he looks like a real regal from back in the day so like 
  • you run a little shop in town that makes hand-made wooden toys and one day jin stops by and asks if you could possibly carve and paint arrows just for him
  • and like he doesn’t really tell you much about the style he wants but you make them very pretty and paint like beautiful flowers on them and jin falls in love with them when you present them to him
  • and he’s like you’re so talented wow and you’re like me?? no!!! you’re the talented one archery is such a ,,,, hard and precise sport,,
  • you two playfully bicker over whose talent is more amazing
  • and jin is like,,,,,,,,,listen you should come watch me,,,,,,ill be using these arrows so if you want ,,,,it’d be nice if you were also there to bring me good luck
  • an you shyly agree and it’s cute you’re there with the rest of bts and jungkooks like “sOOOO you’re hyungs significant other aren’t you?” and hoseok’s like “oh yeah, jin doesn’t invite just anyone to see him compete. you’re totally dating him.”
  • lmao jin doesn’t even have to ask you out, bangtan just unanimously agrees you and jin are thing LOL 
consider this: SMH & one direction

i just wanna talk about smh and 1d ok im so sorry this wasnt supposed to be this long i have no control 

  • dex grew up with sisters (let me have this he has a bunch of sisters ok) so not only was he completely unable to escape one direction he was not allowed to get away with any sort of ‘bands that have mainly young female fanbases are not real music’ misogyny that lots of teen boys and adult males have 
    • so he likes 1d he doesnt advertise but he had to listen to them a lot so he knows their entire discography and what they have some good songs ok bro 
    • so yeah they find their way into his workout playlists so fucking what man they’re fucking hype songs 
    • his fave is niall bc hes chill and just wants to drink beer and play his guitar and listen to dad rock and he’s irish (dex is irish and is grandma loves niall bc she’s irish and what a sweet young lad) he’s not like die hard niall stan but he knows all of the 1d discourse from his sisters debating (im willing to listen to other opinions my back up is louis bc hes a punk) 
    • he save up one year (and got help from his fam) to get tickets for his sisters to see a wwa concert as a birthday/christmas/every holiday present bc theyre expensive and they dont have a lot of money 
      • his mom technically bought the tickets he just helped pay for them and the girls surprised him with a ticket for him to come with (mama poindexter: well i cant let them go alone who’s gonna watch them you have to go make sure they dont get arrested for doing something stupid) dex played it cool but it was such a fun concert and so fun to hang out with his sisters tooo
  • nursey now is a goddamn hipster u cant tell me he isnt into a bunch of british alternative bands and bc of his brit music phase he knew about one direction from the very start at the x factor stage (he definitely mentions this all the goddamn time when they start becoming popular but he chills out through the years)
    • hes been to at least one concert for every tour (he even got tickets to the madison square garden show) - he went to every concert with his sister but it was his idea to go and she was just there to keep an eye on him
    • also a big reason he got into the band was zayn like heres a pakistani muslim boy who’s super talented with these white dudes and that representation is super important (i also hc nursey as muslim or at least partially but zayn is a brown muslim boy killing it so yeah its awesome) 
    • but nurseys fave tho is harry especially when harry is a total hoe with long hair and jewelry and those red carpet looks like nursey is in love but also in awe bc those sparkly boots and that floral suit like those are iconic Looks™ and nursey loves it bc gender isnt real and he loves hoe looks (zayn is like 1.5 tho bc nursey is in love)
      • nursey tries to serenade dex with little things one day when they’re chilling by the pond on the grass and dex punches him bc nursey is making him emo even when he knows dex doesnt have emotions (in public in front of people who can see him cry)
  • bitty likes them they’re no beyonce but theyre fun and attractive and yeah hes gonna have some fun dancing to them he isn’t really up with all the drama and disc*urse until the boys have 1d nights and they watch this is us and the concert dvds bc he learns a lot 
    • he loves 2013 era harry and all the time liam (that boy is thicc and bitty 100% does not swoon)
  • holster like come tf on holster loves them he unironically and passionately loves one direction completely unashamed he does not care for your opinions and no one makes fun of him bc he’s a 6′4 fucking big ass hockey player who could drop kick u across campus if he wanted to
    • he claims he doesnt have a fave but he would die for all of them 
    • his fave rotates seasonally and he has a different fave for each era 
    • he went to the tmh tour and he’s gone to every tour since - he goes with his sisters bc its a bonding topic for them he sits at the edge of the floor or at the end of a row on the sides bc hes so tall he feels so bad and he tries to stay out of the way of the little girls behind him but hes nice to them and talks to them and so they like him even if hes a giant
    • but really he and his sisters are so close bc they have a lot of similar interests and they talk about pop culture stuff and its hard to keep intouch when hes away so much but they have group chats about 1d and tv shows and stuff so its so nice for them to keep up a strong bonding time 
  • ransom is a britney bitch and holster dragged him into 1d. he’s in it for the memes and the drama really. (he likes the songs and thinks its fun but he wouldnt have been a fan and gone to concerts if it wasnt for holtz)
    • holster takes him to the wwa concert and they have a blast 
    • holster also drags his ass to see this is us opening night (they both cry)
  • chowder just loves everyone and he doesnt understand why people hate 1d (or other pop artists with majority young female fan bases that ppl hate bc misogyny) when theyre so fun he’s not an active /fan/ until smh has team bonding nights involving one direction jam sessions and concert dvd watching and drunk history
  • on such 1d nights they put on one of the dvds and it accidentally turns into a drinking game (mainly drinking bc this part of my god did u see that !!! THAT NOTE CHANGE !!!! and ZAYN WHY !!!! and other painful parts) and some of them *cough* nursey dex and holster *cough* get possibly the most drunk they ever get bc of this 
    • theres loud awful drunk singing along and some sobbing (this is definitely not based off of any sort of personal experience whatsoever nope never done this before) 
    • after the movie when everyone is so drunk they talk about 1d history which is how the veterans teach the others about the exciting drama and disc*urse  
  • lardo is a bad bitch who is tough as fuck and manages a division I mens hockey team and every single one of them is afraid of her. AND she would not let any bro tease her for liking one direction bc why the fuck not. 
    • she has plenty of their songs thrown in arting playlists and in pump up playlists 
    • and she knows theres nothing better to cheer holster up when he’s having a rough day than a 1d dance sesh 
    • dont forget where you belong is the first song on her team bonding playlist bc its a love song to ur bandmates which transfers very well to love songs to ur teammates 
  • shitty unapologetically loves 1d and boy bands and girl bands and he supports all things that young girls love but are not taken seriously bc girls like them 
    • he’s written at least 3 papers/projects on the misogyny surrounding young girls and their interests and involvement in fandom and also boybands (he tries to fight all guys who disrespect girls’ interests and the power of teenage girls)
    • he’ll randomly show up to a 1d night bc obvi he’s in that gc and he’s ready to party and express emotions and dance and talk drama 
    • he loves harry bc “THAT FLOW MAN!!! HIS FLOW IS SO SICK!!!”
    • he cried when harry posted the pic of the hair he chopped off and cried when he saw the another man shoot where harry was defying all sorts of societal norms it was beautiful and his flow is still so nice even this short its ok it’ll grow back better than before
  • one friday night the lax bros sneak over to try to prank the haus and peak in the window and see half of the hockey team in the living room drunk off their ass singing loudly to a one direction concert on the tv - holster and nursey jumping around attempting to dance along, ransom clinging to bitty on the floor crying about a ‘hiatus’, bitty soothing ransom, dex forgetting about the drink in his one hand to drink rum from the bottle, shitty naked (not surprising) and slow dancing with a life sized cut-out of harry styles with tears streaming down his face (more surprising), and chowder lying on the couch singing through mouthfuls of pie 
  • they walk back to the lax bro house without executing the prank and they never mention it again