i guess i dont know what love is,
but im coming to find out that it doesnt always feel good.
sometimes its the lonely ache in my chest and the sobbing from missing you
but other times its the warmth and calm you bring, being with you.
i remember my english teacher telling me that no one is in a fixed state of happiness;
we’re only ever normal with occasional sunspots that allow us to forget the still.
you are my sunspot, however, and i cant stop remembering you and how you make me feel; and how that only makes the quiet much deeper and the spaces between us much longer.
On a happy note, what are some of your favorite things about Lance? :3
he loves mermaids
THE SQUEAL WHEN HE SAYS “MERMAIDS!!!” YOU KNOW THE ONE
“i dont need pants. im a mermaid”
he’s an amazing sniper and, as an archer, i have a soft spot for long-distance weapons and characters using them
he has pretty pretty blue eyes and they’re so expressive
flirts with aliens at any given time, at all, like, me too??????
“hasta la later, keith” *dances aggressively*
helped pidge find money so she could buy a game she was excited about and also turned into a dolphin-human hybrid to do so. he loves her so much i want to die
related: he’s probably the best older brother i bet he took his younger siblings to the beach and stayed w them all day and played with them and made sand castles and sand mermaids with them
literally puts his life in danger regularly to save people ??? the explosion and air vacuum thingie scenes come to mind. god he’s so good
that being said he can be kinda selfish (literally manipulated hunk into leaving his lion and coming w him to investigate mermaids just bc he likes mermaids) and i love that about him, i love that he’s not a perfect good boy, i wish the fandom would stop ignoring this tbh tbh
the entire scene in s2 where he was talking abt their plan and like, did amazing imitations. shook his butt. dabbed. literally morphed into a strange galra-humanoid thing for the sake of The Drama™
“that’s the tagline from like six of my favourite movies” lance is a big nerd confirmed
his fucking pickup lines are so funny? they’re so bad they’re good. i’d fall for them lance. i’d fall for them
takes the time to explain stuff when keith doesnt understand, like, they could have easily just made him make fun of keith for not getting the “vol” “tron” thing but he instead explains it
also good at diffusing situations and thinking things thru *insert that god i wish that were me meme*
*talks fondly about his team and then immediately shits on himself* relatable tbh (but i wish he wouldnt)
god, his insecurities are so real they’re palpable. i think a lot of people can see themselves in him bc of them and that’s really cool
“is…that a cow” “mmhmmm”
arguably the only paladin with any semblance of fashion sense
AND ON THAT NOTE HE’S A MALE CHARACTER WHO’S SHOWN TO LOVE SKINCARE UNABASHEDLY and that’s not something you ever see in media and as a cosmetician IT’S REALLY COOL BECAUSE NOW LITTLE BOYS WILL WATCH THIS AND SAY “hey lance is cool and he takes care of his skin maybe i should too!!!” like YES LANCE THANK YOU FOR DESTROYING TOXIC MASCULINITY
the scene w coran and keith outside his door, when he cuts keith off with the buhububbUHBUHUHGBUHG >A< !!!!!
his little “yup” after shiro says the sharpshooter thing
HIS ENTIRE RELATIONSHIP W HUNK TBH FRIENDSHIP GOALS he looks at hunk so fondly NEED ME A FREAQUE LIKE THAT
*beautifully emerges from a coma to shoot someone, smirks, falls back into a coma beautifully*
also flirts w allura to hide the fact that he’s genuinely concerned about their situation that’s a big mood
flirts the moment he emerges from a fucking coma
flirts. so much. he’s always flirting i love that boy
when he had a squid on his head and just rolled w it
“this castle has gone apples and bananas!”
edit: i forgot where i snagged this pic from but it was from one of @planced‘s gifsets :)
I TOOK THIS SCREENSHOT OF HYUCK ACCIDENTLY BUT NOW IM CRYING CAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE A MEME 😂😂😂😂😂 “when they ask u if you have a crush on your bestfriend” “when u r trying to find words to make everyone believe u dont have a crush on mark” “when u r happy but then u remember u have exams and it hits u hard in the heart” “when the devil and angel on your shoulders both trying to make you do something and u dont know which one’s voice u’ll listen” the amount of captions are….limitless
the absolute sweetest thing happened today and it just makes me so happy and want to cry tbh
i got in touch with my old english teacher from high school, who i had for four years and treated me like his own kid tbh, he was the nicest teacher i ever had and was like family to me
he has 4 children and one of them, the oldest of them currently going into 9th grade this year, is an artist and is drawing anime and stuff y'kno and when I started speaking to him he was like everytime this kid draws I think of you, because I was always drawing in class
so I was like hey let me draw some stuff for your kiddo, he gave me his kids instagram and we started talking cuz hes always showing his kids my art i post on my facebook apparently
and im so happy because not only is this kid becoming an artist but i also discovered they’re agender as well, because they had their pronouns on their insta and I asked because I was curious
I drew them one of their OCs and now we’re doing a little art trade because they wanted to draw one of mine
and im honestly so happy i could cry, i dont think you guys know how good and wholesome this feels, how important this is to me, im honestly going to protect this kid with my life
most people call him jo because its short for his given name but in his head he’s already picked out jonas
he told sid when he realised that he didn’t feel at all like a girl and was super Stressed about it, she’s known for about 4/5 years and calls him joey when they’re not around dean and sue
everyone else assumes they’re both just kind of tomboyish, even if joey is more adamant about it
dean and sue refuse to let him get his hair cut short (and no way in hell is he coming out) so he gets sid to “accidently” get gum in it…multiple times
the short hair is So Good and he manages to convince at least sue to let him keep it like that
he wears sports bras that are too small cos he cant get a binder and he knows its not ideal but its all he can do, baggy tshirts are Essential
Mitch still antagonises Jonas
in middle school Jonas tried to befriend Mitch and confides in him that he feels more like a boy than a girl, though doesnt have the words for what that is
Mitch is just kinda lol ok, then the moment at the end of the middle school comic happens when Mitch is like fuk of im not gay and i dont have any feelings ever
which, 1. makes joey super happy cos that means mitch accepts him for whatever he is? but also 2. now mitch hates him???? poor boy is confused
while working on the science project and theyre talking about Deep Shit at wackyland Joey brings up not being able to come out (joeys shitting himself the entire gdamn time)
Mitch is just fukin angry that joey also has to go through being trapped by shitty dad like he did, tells him hes a dude even if hes the only one who knows hes a dude (bcos Mitch is gay as fuck but its only really his mum who knows)
Joey is just???wow another person who treats him like a guy, even if everyone still thinks hes just a mean ol boy
im so proud of louis’ strength, he’s been dealing with this shit since day one and he is still smiling and telling us to keep going, to move on… i dont know how he does it but it amazes me and im so happy to be here to share his achievements with him and always celebrate the good things and not focus on the negative even when things are going downhill, i cant put into words how much all of this inspires me, he makes life seems worth it
They should know he's a guy by now but anyways how are u doing today ?
// Well between dealing with a handful of people stealing, tracing, and otherwise reposting my art, telling me I’m wrong for politely calling them out and handling it like an adult in DMs, trying to help handle the #savebendy bullshit, people ripping off my designs for Lendy & Acute & Alice, having my characters misgendered repeatedly after already making a post on the matter, being insulted directly to my face on a handful of servers, handling some personal drama, and generally feeling alone in groups of people (not their fault) I’ve been… okay. Mostly just extremely tired and admittedly a bit pissy. I haven’t hardly eaten this week and today I can’t stop so if I don’t post a lot its because I’ve made myself sick, sorry in advance.
i hope this means like just like regular msr headcanons? right? if im wrong just give me another ask and ill do the something else :$) and like thank u for sending this :$)
btw happy headcanons: thats the cutest thing ive ever read by the way. happy headcanons. i dont know why i just
-mulder and scully had saw each other prior to the pilot meeting. i mean, one or both of them had probably attended a lecture that the other had done and were familiar with their face. i mean, given that neither passed out when they laid eyes on each other.
-after their first meeting, scully went home (btw why the fuck was she dismissed after like five minutes at work. ‘we leave for the very plausible state of oregon at 8 am see u tomorrow’ what the fuck) but after their first meeting, scully called ellen and told her she was working with that hot lecturer from last year and he was coincidentally spooky mulder, the most single man on the planet. help me ellen i dont know if ill make it.
-mulder called the gunmen because he needed advice about this adorable little redhead that had been assigned to him and oh god im screwed. i mean i hope one day i will be, but right now, im totally, metaphorically, screwed. she was sent to spy on me right???? what do i do now?????
-mulder’s fear of fire (i know but just wait) was cured after that case, one because scully was there and he knew nothing bad was gonna happen to him so he felt more comfortable facing said fear, and two, 'scully was there and she was really really cute and i was tryin to get with her all this first year and then that bitch phoebe showed up and fucked everything up and im not letting her have any power over me so there. fear cancelled. ’
-mulder slept with like a sheet as a blanket for years. he overheats. hes a walking furnace. but after the season 3 incident (or was there one before??) where mulder spends the night in scullys bed because he got poisoned, he noticed that she had a lot of covers on her bed. so eventually he went out and bought a ton of blankets just in case she ever spent the night at his place (purely platonically right???) and so she wouldnt get cold.
-not msr related but walter skinner knits. and is good at it. check out his etsy store. smoking man-voodoo dolls half off until forever.
-not happy, but the reason why mulder wears such hideous ties is because his father and his minions were government workers and always impeccably dressed, and when mulder became a federal agent, he hated the idea that he was growing up to be just like the man, so he embraced the 90’s style.
-scully could never tell you, but maggie could: mulder adn scully had worked together for three months. just three months. and by that time, scully had stashed a pack of sunflower seeds in her car, her apartment, mulder’s car (that man cannot think ahead), her mother’s house and the cushions of the mulder’s normal chair in walter skinner’s office.
-alternatively, mulder stashed scully’s favorite cassettes in his car, his apartment (hey, he could dance. maybe if the mood struck them they’d put something on and let some yayas out), the office (for when she was in a particularly awful mood because of some shit he pulled.)
-scully always gets mulder cryptid or alien gizmos when shes out of town. mulder always gets her science or medical related stuff. they once had to suffer through a budget meeting in 98 degree heat with their coats on because neither was willing to show off the “i’m feeling all science-y” (spelled with periodic letters), or the “aliens exist” temporary tattoos they were each sporting.
-at the end of every month, whoever has been to the hospital more takes the other out to dinner. it started out as a formal affair, going to a fancy restaurant and pretending that they were just friends not fbi partners. now the atmosphere is still the same, but they go to sandwich shops or burger places. scully just wanted to make sure mulder didn’t go broke since he was paying for dinner every time.
-the gunmen do regular bug sweeps of the office, their apartments, and maggie scully’s house. it was actually mulder who asked them to do hers because the adoption papers have almost gone through and his new mom needs protection. but once a month, the gunmen have a great time going over to maggies, they have lunch with her, and then in the afternoon right as they’re wrapping up, maggie’s friends come over to play cards adn invite melvin, richard and john to play with them.
-the gunmen are the #1 Caught in the Act witnesses because of the bug sweeps at the wrong times. maggie scully is #2. william scully was #3. an incident with the 3rd victim and Return of the Jedi movie night caused carrie fisher’s gold bikini to be forever tainted.
-maggie scully is very protective of fox. shes well aware that shes’ the only person who can call him fox without triggering him, and she loves this poor boy. she’s his second emergency contact, after scully of course, adn occasionally she’ll get a call saying fox is in the hospital only to show up and find her daughter straddling his hips with her tongue down his throat. “DANA KATHERINE SCULLY THIS MAN NEEDS HIS REST AND IF I FIND YOU DISTRACTING HIM FROM THAT ONE MORE TIME I’LL HAVE YOU THROWN OUT OF THE HOSPITAL UNTIL HES BETTER.” “maggie im really okay” “FOX YOU WOULDNT BE IN THE HOSPITAL IF YOU WERE OKAY.” and meanwhile scully’s hiding under mulder’s covers with a face to match her hair.
-walter skinner is genuinely terrified of maggie.
-totally not a headcanon yall probably know this from watching season seven right???? right????? but mulder agreed to go to oregon with skinner under one condition: scully goes to the hospital and gets checked out. i’m not leaving you until i know that you’re not going to pass out alone in the apartment and accidentally die.
-mulder never cried harder than when he found out scully was pregnant.
-“skinman i quit the bureau thank you and goodby-”“wait, sir, its me, agent scully, ill call you right back after mulder and i have a talk ok?”
-mulder’s allergic to pineapples. but it mysteriously went away a week after everyone found out about it.
-scully was forced by maggie to go to her high school reunion, and so she convinced mulder to come and put on the s'mulder (he trademarked that thats another story) and get back at those fucking bitches who bullied her for trying to start a biology club.
-actual dialogue from that night: “Scully? You tried to start a biology club that’s so cute.” “Emphasis on try.” “What, no one wanted to compete with Dana Scully’s genius?” “More like no one wanted to be around Dana Scully.” “Awww, Scully, I would have been in the biology club with you.” “Thanks, Mulder.” “we can start our own biology club” “mulder we’re not- whatever. oh wait check out my butt, stephanie baker is looking”
-scully and mulder both gave each other stars for christmas the same year, and they went stargazing to try and find them, only to discover that they were right next to each other in the sky.
-scully did in fact give mulder porn for christmas that one year. that seems really weird but you didn’t see the card.
“heres blank tape, video camera’s all set up. figured since those tapes aren’t yours, we could make one that was.”
-the gunmen can quote the lazarus bowl line for line. so can skinner. he plays it whenever hes sad.
-mulder makes a point of PDA towards scully whenever bill scully jrs in the room. not enough to be obviously trying to piss him off, but enough that he most certainly is.
-mulder changed his shampoo to make his hair especially fluffy circa season 2. do you miss me scully? do you miss petting my fluffy hair?
-anytime one of them asks the other for a drink, mulder will bring scully iced tea, and she’ll bring him root beer. everytime he’ll throw his head back in mock disappointment like that one stakeout.
-mulder is very aware of how much it turns scully on to see him with no jacket, dress shirt arms rolled up to his elbows. thank goodness he normally runs hot.
-they both secretly love when the other rests their head on their shoulder. but of course they never admit it.
-mulder always makes them run an office secret santa. just the two of them. because hes mulder.
-his fish have all been named after moby dick characters since he heard that that was a thing.
-they went on runs together during that second year just to be able to spend time together, but then stopped because how the fucking hell is scully faster than him, im sorry scully you’re ruining my rep, im gonna have to pretend i wasn’t just beaten in a 5k run by someone nine inches shorter than me.
-mulders mother bought him a polaroid camera when he went off to england for school, saying that he’d make so many memories adn all that crap. he never used it until he and scully were put on fertilizer background checking and he wanted to make the best of their roadtrips. she then bought one of her own and thus began the most intense contest of their lives to see who could take the most candid shots of the other. at this point in time, mulder’s closet has just of boxes of pictures of scully.
-their son would find all these thousands of pictures years later and wonder, for the thousandth time that day, what the fuck was wrong with his parents.
-they once had to take a ferry. dont ask me how or why, but it was just something they had to do. and mulder refused to stop just quoting lines from moby dick. the only way that scully could get him to stop was to pretend to see a nessie like creature.
-scully dominates at paintball, and when her son hit eleven years old, became the coolest person in the world hands down. mulder didnt stop trying to convince her that she was ALWAYS the coolest person in the world.
-they have a box of mulder’s clothes that scully simply labeled “the apocalypse could be upon us but so help me if these jeans go missing, i will hunt you down and end you.” nobody touches her man’s ass hugging jeans.
-scully + hoodie + overcaffinated mulder =
[this was the last thing i wrote last night before i passed out and i have no idea where i was trying to go with it but i think its hilarious so…]
-when mulder adn scully were first picking out things for their home together, mulder came home with a light blue-purple linen comforter. he liked the color and the texture and they loved it for exactly one year until william threw up on it and they couldnt get the stain out.
-mulder has been banned from the local florist because he loitered too long trying to pick out flowers for scully, they thought it was suspicious.
-mulder then got into gardening, and was taught by skinner how to not kill a plant.
-they have a sunflower patch right outside william’s bedroom window.
-maggie knit a blanket for william that he slept wrapped up in until he was in grad school adn the stitching finally gave out.
-if they were to have another kid, the siblings would have a rapport much like mulder and samantha’s or melissa adn scully’s. they called each other buttmunch adn teased and pulled each others hair, but let each other tag along on adventures and shit.
-mulder has a frequent customer card from LUSH because his lady loves baths and he loves excuses to follow her around smelling her hair all damn day.
-theres a fair in the tiny town they live in once a year in july. they have a family tradition of going to it, and watching fireworks and going on rides. by ten o'clock, every single time, both kids would crash from the funnel cake-induced sugar high.
-the first movie william scully ever attended was the incredibles. until the age of 9 he wanted to be a superhero and mulder 100% supported him and tried to get scully to do some science experiment that would make their son into a superhero.
-they live in a tiny town where the only entertainment is either a movie theater running very old movies or the local elementary school’s talent show. theres a farmers market on the main street every weekend in the summer and the mulder-scully clan often will bike down and hang out there for the day.
-mulder and scully chaperone school dances. every single dance. if there’s a photo booth, they’ll go make out in said photo booth and embarrass their kids only slightly more than if they were slow dancing in the middle of the vacant dance floor. “cant you just be normal???? i get you waited years to get together and are 'makin up for lost time’ but you dont have to take it out on me!!!!!”
-every year they host a “sci-fi july” for all of their friends and their families. they hang a sheet up outside every saturday night in july and watch a different sci fi movie out on the projector. scully and mulder can always be found in the back of the crowd, cuddling in a beanbag and arguing about inaccuracies.
-drive in movies. mulder adn scully cuddling in the back seat of the car while their offspring block their view on the hood of it, sharing a box of fries.
-maggie dominates the bake sale. neither mulder or scully can cook for shit and so they enlist maggie and she becomes famous.
-william has been banned from playing poker. after winning far too much off of uncle frohike, he’s been demoted to crazy 8s.
-mulder has half an alien face tattooed on his lower back. since scully has a tattoo he should too right? but he could only handle the tattoo needle for so long and afterwards scully assured him that half an alien head looked plenty cool and she loved it. he didn’t really care, she’d be the only one to get to see it, but he was more fascinated about why the hell the tattoo needle turned her on originally????? wh- how-??? scully????
-uncle skinner takes his godchildren’s halloween costumes to a new level.
-the bullpen bet as to who the father of scully’s kid was (please everyone knew it was mulder, but they were just bored) was called off when scully left early one day with the most intense craving for sunflower seeds.
-the only thing that mulder knows how to cook is grilled cheese and tomato soup. you’d think toast would be easier than grilled cheese, adn therefore something he could cook, but that is not the case.
-anytime one of the kids is sick, mulder or scully stays home with them and they spend the entire day playing scrabble and eating cinnamon toast.
-an older will is completely unable to walk anywhere near the hoover building without being yelled at as “HEY SPOOKY MU- oh sorry buddy. jeez you look like your dad”.
-as they grow older, mulder and scully decide to retire from the bureau. scully will occasionally do pathology consulting or lecture circuits, but for the most part, they simply stay around their home in virginia and have the peace that they always dreamed of.
-but that said, after their retirement, the x files, for the first time, remained open, and in years to come, many agents worked their way in and out of the office, none having as much a lasting devotion to it as mulder adn scully had. the few that did last fairly long had just as much trouble with the government conspiracies as their predecessors, despite the smoking man being long dead.
and when these agents had difficulty on cases, when they were clearly lacking in bits of information only people deeply involved with the conspiracy or long-time observants would know, all of these agents made their way out into the more rural parts of virginia, to an old but warm house, and they’d sit on the porch listening to mulder and scully bicker about what was true or not, now being the deep throat contact that the x files depends on. but for the first time, these deep throats weren’t at risk of murder because the head of the fbi was their children’s godfather and god help the poor bastard who disrupted their peaceful life.
-mulder always keeps the freezer stocked with chocolate ice cream. if its not, it is treated like a national emergency.
I cant stress enough how much i look forward to starting on T, and getting top surgery.
I cant wait to hear my voice crack for the first time.
I cant wait to start shaving
I cant wait to look down at my chest and be happy with what i see
I cant wait to pass as a male
I cant wait to get that jawline i hope i get
I cant wait to stop getting my period. (You have no idea how wrong it feels, every freaking month!)
I cant wait to be called a boy by everyone around me
I cant wait to be a proud trans boy, who isnt afraid.
I cant wait to people making fun of my voice cracking, even if im 21 when i start on T.
I cant wait to go topless at the beach, and no one staring at me weirdly.
I cant wait to be ‘one of the boys’
I cant wait to be able to go into the mens section in stores, and not get weird stares.
I cant wait to go into a mens bathroom, and no one looking at me weirdly.
I cant wait till i find a name that i think suits me, and then having people calling me that
I cant wait to teach people about lgbt+
I cant wait to meet other people like myself
I cant wait to hear somone call me their BOYfriend
I cant wait to be refferd to as a boy, even when im not around.
I cant wait to hear my mom and dad call me their son
I cant wait to tell my story to other trans people, and hearing other stories
I cant wait to wear a dress, even after i have transitioned fully, and then rock it!
I cant wait to stop being scared
I cant wait to stop crying
I cant wait to stop hating my self
I cant wait to not feeling like this anymore
I cant wait to be happy with my self
I cant wait to be a better person
I cant wait to be more happy, so much more happy
I cant wait to get the people out of my life who arent okay with me being trans
I cant wait to set and X with male on tests
I cant wait to start growing a beard
I cant wait to then shaving it off
I cant wait to when people dont have to be scared to come out as trans, or anything else
I cant wait to all parents are accepting and supportive of their kids
I cant wait to all people re accepting and supportive of their friends and family.
I cant wait to being trans isn’t something you should hide, becouse you are scared of others reactions.
I know i can do many of these things already when i havnt gotten the surgery nor started on T. But when i do get the surgery, and start on T, i know im gonna be much more confedint. Im gonna move away from where i am now, and start again, as the boy i truly am, and not someone i pretend to be.
I am so lucky that i have suportive parents and suportive friends, and im so happy. I am so freaking lucky to have them, even though im not fully out at all to everyone i know, just this little start means so much. And i cant imagine how it would be for somone without the suport. So please, if you know somone who is trans, agender, bigender, or something else, pleasure suport them. They might ask you to use a diffrent pronounce, or name, and if they do that, please use the name/pronounce they want, it means so much. And even if its a bit hard for you to remmber it, please try your best, and if you use the wrong name/pronounce, just quickly change it and move on, no need to make a big deal out of it. But just things as that can help so much, it can really mean a lot.
Being trans isnt always easy, some people have it worse than others.But i know just the smallest things, can make someone that much happier.
I my self is a 17 year old trans guy, i havnt always known that, but im glad i have figured it out. There are still a lot of things i dont know yet about my self, But for now, i know im a trans guy, i am pansexual, though leaning towards guys, so i would say im quite gay.
People figure out who they are at diffrent times, some when they are young, others when they are older. ANd that is okay, you should never force anything, and you dont have to label yourself, some people like labels, others dont. Just do what you feel comfortable doing, and dont judge others for doing the same thing.
I know i dont have a big following, and most of my folowers are porn blogs, but i just really nedded to say these things, and i will probrly reblog this post later, and probrbly also write one more or two. Happines is something that comes and goes, right now im okay, but i know that i will meet people who wont agree with who i am, and tell me that who i am is wrong, and tell me all kind of negative things, and i know i will cry, a lot more, happy tears and sad tears, beauce there is gonna be hard times and good times, and that is never gonna change, i hope it will though.
Anyways, im Ollie for the time being, a little gay trans guy just passing by. My inbox is always open, and i would love to talk to people, and learn about their experiences.
a couple of pre-t vs almost 1 year on T comparison pictures, and then some shirtless post-op selfies!
so, i wanted to make a little progress post for pride month, and just. wow! what a year! its almost my T anniversary, and im over two weeks post-op now and healing up nicely. so much has changed for me in this past year…ive slowly learned to start loving myself and the body im in, and now that ive finally had top surgery i feel truly free for the first time in forever. im comfortable and happy with where i am in life right now, and i want to say to all my trans fellows out there who are struggling: life gets better. life goes on. one day its going to be okay. i know how dark and miserable it can be sometimes, i know how much it hurts to cry yourself to sleep over things you cant control, and i know everything can feel hopeless. but please dont give up on yourself! please hang in there!
and please, feel free to message me if you need support or have questions. im here for you, and i love you <3 happy pride month everybody