Leverage OT3 with "“Ok, so you panicked and kissed the human so he wouldn’t drown, but we can’t keep him and he can’t leave if he knows about us merpeople, so what are we going to do” au"
Hardison wakes up tied to something with the sound of two people arguing close by, which is not his favorite way to wake up. It is even less his favorite way to wake up when he opens his eyes and finds himself staring a fish full in the face, because he is underwater, and apparently tied up with kelp like a baby otter. “No way,” he says, and somehow doesn’t drown even though he isn’t wearing scuba gear.
“He’s awake,” someone hisses, also not muffled through scuba gear, and Hardison shifts around, swimming awkwardly, until he comes face-to-face with …
Well. They are definitely not mermaids, because mermaids do not exist, but also, they are definitely mermaids. “We can’t just keep him, Parker,” says the dude mermaid, who would probably be called a merman if mermaids existed, sounding angry. His hair is floating around his head like a halo and he looks like he would kick someone’s ass if he had feet.
“You were the one who kissed him,” says the lady mermaid, who is definitely topless, that is a thing that is happening, she is a topless mermaid and Hardison keeps his eyes on their hair because that is the safe and smart thing to do.
“Who kissed me? I do not remember kissing, and also I do not believe in mermaids.”