i don't think anyones on but oh well

Batfam as things my coworkers have said
  • Bruce, overheard on the phone as he's leaving WE: Wait, your brother is at work? (...) Oh thank god, that means I can sleep when I get home.
  • ---------------
  • Dick, giving Duke a tour of the Batcave: I'm sure you'll fit in just fine. Everyone's really nice here. Except for Jason.
  • Jason, from across the cave: That's messed up!
  • ---------------
  • Stephanie: *sees Cass's hand is bandaged up* Oh my god, are you okay?
  • Cass: Yeah, I just stabbed myself. It's fine.
  • ---------------
  • Tim: What, you think that because you're bootylicious, you can do whatever you want?
  • Jason, nodding: Yeah, pretty much.
  • ---------------
  • Damian: Alfred knows everything, he just pretends that he doesn't.
  • Alfred: Well, somebody needs to know something around here.
  • ---------------
  • Stephanie, inspecting Tim's under-eye circles: You need some makeup, fam. That shit is unsettling.
  • ---------------
  • Dick, to Roy: I hereby name you an official member of the family!
  • Jason: It's a trap, dude. You don't wanna be part of this family.
  • ---------------
  • Tim: Has anyone seen my coffee?
  • All: No.
  • Tim: Looks like it sucks to be Steph today. *picks up Stephanie's coffee and walks away*
  • ---------------
  • Duke: You've gotta be crazy to work here.
  • Jason: You don't HAVE to be crazy. We can always train you.
  • ---------------
  • WE Employee: *walks into Bruce's office to hear a loud alarm coming from his computer while Bruce fills out paperwork, seemingly unperturbed*
  • WE Employee: How can you just sit there and listen to that?
  • Bruce: Do you have any idea how many kids I have?

Batfam Hogwarts Houses (in my opinion) and why

*note if i make a mistake or anything let me know. i haven’t read everything with the batfam so if it isnt canon compliant i apologize now please dont send me hate mail

Ravenclaw -

  • Bruce: he is very smart (you would have to be to be the world’s greatest detective, right?) not only that but they prize originality and eccentrics and well just look at bruce and all the kids he has/has adopted. they are all very diverse and he seems to enjoy and foster their differences
  • Barbara: this is pretty obvious but Barbara is one of the smartest members of the batfam. Not only that but with her wit and love of learning it makes this pretty obvious
  • Tim: also kinda obvious BUT i would put him in this house because he’s very creative and smart. plus i always feel like Tim is always trying to impress everyone around him with his intelligence
  • Tiffany: she’s the daughter of lucius fox so obviously she’s very hardworking and smart but what really decided ravenclaw for her was the fact that shes is the manager of the wayne’s drug rehab program
  • Max: she is known as the smartest girl is terry’s class and also knows he is batman

Hufflepuff -

  • Cassandra: ok cassandra is as loyal as dog (from what i’ve read/seen) so this seems like the most obvious choice. not only that but they value hardwork and dedication which you need to not only master fighting BUT also ballet which she is a pro at
  • Stephanie: basically what @ladykattz said here
  • Nell: (i’m considering her part of the batfam because she is shown in bombshells as part of the little bat-baseball gang thing and i love her and we need more of her) she’s very loyal to batgirl (stephanie brown) and looks up to her
  • Alfred: he is loyal to bruce and the wayne family no matter what happens. not only that but he must have the patience of a saint for dealing with them all (bruce and his brooding alone) 
  • Leslie: she has always been the reliable older person that everyone can trust because she is kind and doesn’t judge. this was the obvious choice for her

Gryffindor -

  • Jason: i was torn between slytherin and gryffindor for him but what decided it for me is that the main traits for gryffindor are bravery, courage, and daring and if we are talking about the positives to jason he has all of those things in abundance
  • Terry: after finding the entrance to the batcave and then deciding to become batman against bruce’s wishes, it’s easy to say you gotta be pretty bold. plus bravery? terry has that in abundance since he really had no formal training before donning the batsuit and still was able to take down the powers corp
  • Duke: for all that duke has been through and still has the ability to be the ray of sunshine he is, that is pretty freakin’ amazing and brave. (also remember that time he burned someone alive in front of bruce cause i do that’s a bold thing to do because of bruce’s adverseness to killing)
  • Kate: she is unapologetically herself (a proud jewish lesbian) who knows how to kick ass and take names. that makes this easy to place her in Gryffindor

Slytherin -

  • Helena: being the daughter of bruce and selina, she was raised from birth to be a smart fighter and detective. she is cunning has self preservation and determination 
  • Damian: for the first years of his life he was raised by talia and the league of assassins and they raised him to be a cunning and deadly fighter. not only that he does like to come off as detached and not really caring which is a total slytherin thing to do but he actually cares deeply

anyways this is what i think! if i forgot anyone or anything, you don’t agree, you want to expand, etc feel free!

9

DO NOT REDISTRIBUTE OR REUPLOAD!!

Actually have been hesitating about posting this in Tumblr for weeks now, but…guess why not. Not translating his Q&A though…=_=

And no need for other members, I presume? =_=“

sadincae

fish husband *shot* No but if not him, Urbosa? qUq/

Watch me shamelessly using this chance to draw the OTP. Gods do I ship them.

  • Voltage guy: yeah I'm not interested in dating or falling in love with anyone.
  • Me: ( aww why tho? U hot and I know I'm ugly but who the fuck cares man oh well *sigh* )
  • *7 EPISODES LATER*
  • Voltage guy: I am interested in a certain someone..
  • Me: hello....it's me.
Guardians of the Galaxy Roleplay Sentence Starters
  • "You'll die! Why are you doing this? Why?"
  • "Well that's just as fascinating as the first 89 times you told me that."
  • "Well I tell you what, that's gonna wear real thin, real fast, bud."
  • " I just wanted to tell you how grateful I am that you've accepted me despite my blunders. It is good to once again be among friends."
  • "This dumb tree is also my friend."
  • "I have lived most of my life surrounded my enemies. I will be grateful to die among my friends."
  • "Aww, what the hell, I don't got that long a lifespan anyway... "
  • "Well now I'm standing. Happy? We're all standing now. Bunch of jackasses, standing in a circle."
  • "We've already established that you destroying the ship I'm on is not saving me!"
  • "That is the most real, authentic, hysterical laugh of my entire life."
  • "Finger on throat means death!"
  • "They got my dick message."
  • "His people are completely literal. Metaphors go over his head."
  • "That dude there. I need his prosthetic leg. "
  • "God knows I don't need the rest of him. Look at him. He's useless."
  • "Well, supposedly, these bald bodies find you attractive, so maybe you could work out some sort of trade."
  • "That's for if things get really hardcore. Or if you wanna blow up moons."
  • "You just wanna suck the joy out of everything."
  • "Who put the sticks up their butts?"
  • "I am going to die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy."
  • "Fine, but I can't promise when all of this is over I'm not going to kill every last one of you jerks."
  • "See, this is exactly why none of you have any friends!"
  • "Oh she has no idea. If I had a blacklight, this would look like a Jackson Pollock painting."
  • "You got issues."
  • "He thinks I'm some stupid thing! He does!"
  • " I didn't ask to be torn apart and put back together over and over and turned into some little monster!"
  • "When I look around, you know what I see? Losers."
  • "You're an imbecile."
  • "I can't believe I got taken down by a raccoon."
  • "Raccoon? What's a raccoon?"
  • "Ain't no thing like me, except me!"
  • "We're just like Kevin Bacon."
  • "I live for the simple things... like how much this is going to hurt!"
  • "Dance-off, bro. Me and you."
  • "I like your knife, I'm keeping it."
  • "Oh, I was just kidding about the leg. I just need these two things."
  • "He said that he may be an... a-hole. But he's not, and I quote, 100% a dick".
  • "Well, I don't know if I believe anyone is 100% a dick."
  • "Let's see if you can laugh after five or six good shots in your freakin' face!"
  • "Creepy little beast!"
  • "I don't learn. One of my issues."
  • "Look at this thing. It thinks it's so cool. It's not cool to ask for help! Walk by yourself, you little gargoyle!"
  • "Hooked on a Feeling, Blue Swede! That song belongs to me!"
  • "Hold on a second, you're being serious right now?"
  • "I can't believe I'm taking orders from a hamster."
  • "You're a good looking girl. You should try to be more nice to people."
  • Griffin: "My boyfriend-to-be keeps on giving me the head lice. About two months ago I found some head lice in my hair the morning after someone I'm dating slept in my place. I did the treatment the same day. Two weeks later, slept together again and I found living lice again. It happened again yesterday, then I got the treatment again. And today as well." That's four lices. That's four different lice events. "What should I do? We're not close enough to talk about that, but I'm pretty sure he's the one giving them to me. I'm tired of doing treatments and changing tons of sheets after we're sleeping. I thought about telling him I got them somehow, and in a responsible way I'm telling him but I'm afraid he'll be turned off by me. Please help me, *frowney face*."
  • Justin: Turned off by you? He's the lice guy!
  • Travis: This is a tale as old as time. We get this question every week where people say, 'I'm sleeping with someone but at what point is it time to say I know you have lice?' Y'know what I mean? Like, yes, we will engage in intercourse and sleep in the same bed together, but we're not quite at the place where we're comfortable talking about each other's head lice?!
  • Griffin: He's probably very embarrassed about it. Here's what drives me crazy is you've done four of these treatments - if he does one, he's probably good to go at that point.
  • Travis: I don't think he IS that embarrassed, Griffin. I'm saying, maybe that's what he thinks he's bringing to the table. 'Listen, I don't have a great personality, I'm not very rich, but you know what I do have? Head full of lice.'
  • Justin: A billion little fingers to please you.
  • Griffin: Oh god!
  • Travis: We're gonna share this together, baby. You, me, and the lice.
  • Griffin: Go. Go, my little sexual servants.
  • ...
  • Travis: Call me Lice Bryce.
  • Justin: Lice Bryce, Ant-Man's shitty brother.
  • ...
  • Travis: I've also never described anyone as my 'girlfriend-to-be'.
  • Justin: Well Trav, I think if somebody gave me lice four times I'd probably keep'em in the maybe column.

anonymous asked:

Flocklander, you make shipping fun. Oh, and don't tell anyone, but I think that Sam and Cait are a real life couple and love the fucks and stuff on the regular. Eddie is their one true confidant and never spills the beans. That's why they let her sleep on the end of their bed. Well, she sleeps on Sam's hairy chest while he's watching tv because Sam's nice like that.

Your secret is safe with me, shmoo-boo.

*two seconds later*

GIRLS, MAKE UP ANOTHER CHAIR ON THE LIDO DECK. I FOUND ANOTHER ONE OF US!

Originally posted by gingersnap23

yarrayora  asked:

sci-fantasy where earth have fae and humans gotta keep an eye on their alien friends so they don't get tricked into a deal

Oh man, this sounds so good! I really love reading stuff about the fae/fair folk, as well as space australia stuff, so this is like, the best idea to me. 

Humans giving their alien friends jewlery of iron and packets of salt (I think that’s correct?) to protect them, and teaching them how not to anger the fae.

I can’t think of anything else to add but if anyone else has more ideas I would love to hear them!

Introverts At Parties (Social Anxiey)
  • Friend Billy: Hey, wanna come to a friend’s party? It’s gonna be really cooool!
  • Introvert (in head) : I’d rather be at home just eating a bag of chips and watching netflix but since you’re my friend and I don't want you to think I am an anti-social weirdo I'll act like I want to go....
  • Introvert: yeah sure :)
  • *goes to party*
  • Introvert, in head: nonononono.. why did i come to this? I don't know anyone here. *anxiety* ok, ok. just calm down. Let's just find a space were no one will talk to me and just chill there. Ok? OK.... THERE'S SOMEONE COMING. OH NOOO. WHAT DO I DO? HE LOOKES INTIMIDATING, I DON'T KNOW HIMMMMMMMM HE--
  • Extrovert: Hey, so are you new here? I haven't seen you before...
  • Introvert: Yeah. Billy's my friend, he invited me here.
  • Extrovert: Oh cool, Billy is so nice. Well, nice talking to you, cya :)
  • Introvert: bye...
  • Introvert in head: Ok that wasn't that bad. I'm overreacting, parties are cool, I really just need to calm dow- THERE'S SOMEONE COMING HELP!!!!!1!
  • *cycle repeats infinitely*
The Signs As Things Said In My AP Calc Class Today
  • Aries: "Okay, now the baby's stabbing people"
  • Taurus: "This is why 'abandon all hope ye who enter here' is our math class slogan."
  • Gemini: "It's not convoluted, it's just a pain."
  • Cancer: "Ohgod where did that come from?! Oh god what was that?!"
  • Leo: "It's relatively okay. Relatively is the operative word there."
  • Virgo: "You want to use the product rule here." "I don't want to use the product rule here but I think I have to."
  • Libra: "I wouldn't ever say 'I got sassy with her in the margins' ever again."
  • Scorpio: "Did we do rose curves this year? It was last year. Everything's blurring together. I haven't slept. Just waiting for the sweet embrace of death."
  • Sagittarius: "You guys are doing well in here. Probably better than y'all deserve to."
  • Capricorn: "Does anyone have any questions?" *very quietly* "Can we just not?"
  • Aquarius: "Now that you're full of brownies and equations let's do some work!"
  • Pisces: *screaming*
20 Questions for Ed Sheeran, January 25, 2017.
  • Interviewer: What's the most exciting thing in life right now?
  • Ed: Uh, the new album. Coming out third of March.
  • Interviewer: What are you completely tired of right now?
  • Ed: Uhh... I dunno. Walking Dead. I can't seem to get into it. I'm on season four and it's just, I haven't-
  • Interviewer: I'm there as well! Which episode are you on right now?
  • Ed: I'm on like episode five? They're all ill and they're coughing up blood, and-
  • Interviewer: Oh, yeah. It gets better though. Keep on watching it bro.
  • Ed: See, everyone's been saying that, but I've watched like sixty episodes now, and I'm like, I can't quite... so yeah, I'm trying to get through it.
  • Interviewer: What song took you the least amount of time to write?
  • Ed: Thinking Out Loud.
  • Interviewer: What's the first thing that you do when you get an idea for a song?
  • Ed: Uhh, I shut the doors and go away from people.
  • Interviewer: If you could teach one subject at a school, what would it be?
  • Ed: Music. I'm actually going back to teach music at my old school soon.
  • Interviewer: Beautiful, I like that. Did you ever have detention during growing up and going to school?
  • Ed: 'Course, all the time.
  • Interviewer: All the time? Every day?
  • Ed: All the time.
  • Interviewer: What's your favorite drink?
  • Ed: Uhhh... beer. Ale. Like ale. Good, good English ale. Does Finland do good ale?
  • Interviewer: I don't know about that. Not so good. It's okay, but I think it's better in England.
  • Ed: Yeah. You can't drink too much of it though 'cause it's so heavy, it just, I just fall asleep. So I have three and I fall asleep. But the first one is like... glorious.
  • Interviewer: What's your favorite food?
  • Ed: ...Fish and chips? I reckon. Fish and chips. If you give me a fish and chips and an ale, pfft, game over. That's my day.
  • Interviewer: That's perfect. That's heaven. What's one thing you need to have in your fridge always? No matter what-
  • Ed: Ketchup.
  • Interviewer: Ketchup? With fish and chips.
  • Ed: I've actually refused to eat fish and chips when there wasn't any ketchup. I just think it's a travesty.
  • Interviewer: I get that. What's your favorite movie of all time?
  • Ed: Goodfellas.
  • Interviewer: Oh that's a good one. Classic. Favorite TV show?
  • Ed: A show called Love/Hate actually. It's an Irish TV show, like Gangland Dublin. It's amazing.
  • Interviewer: What's the funniest thing you've ever read about yourself on the internet?
  • Ed: That I introduced Adele and her husband Simon. Um, 'cause I do - I now - know them, but like when that came out I, well I'd met Adele, but I'd never met Simon. So I don't know how I could've introduced them.
  • Interviewer: Would you love to work with Adele?
  • Ed: Yeah. I don't think anyone's going to work with Adele. I think Adele kind of doesn't want to work with anyone. I think she does her own thing. So yeah, I think I'd say yes but I don't think it would ever happen.
  • Interviewer: What's the best way to relax for Ed Sheeran?
  • Ed: Sleep. Always a good way, yeah.
  • Interviewer: That's what I do as well. Name one thing you can't live without.
  • Ed: Um. My cats.
  • Interviewer: How many cats do you have?
  • Ed: Two. And they're GREAT.
  • Interviewer: Are you thinking about getting a third one?
  • Ed: I think it'd be unfair. They're sisters, so if you add another cat into the mix it might get weird.
  • Interviewer: What scares you the most?
  • Ed: Uh, heights. Yeah.
  • Interviewer: Me too, I'm afraid of heights. Have you ever done a bungee jump?
  • Ed: I did, yeah. I hated it. Have you done it?
  • Interviewer: Really, you did it?! So you've probably beat that then.
  • Ed: No, no it's made it even worse. Even worse, yeah. Never do it.
  • Interviewer: Really? Okay, I'm not gonna do it then. Thanks for the tip man.
  • Ed: Oh god, I'm just remembering falling down that, like oh god, it was horrible.
  • Interviewer: What was your first job?
  • Ed: My first job, I worked in a pub. I washed, I did the washing up in a pub.
  • Interviewer: If you could travel to any place in the whole world, where would you go?
  • Ed: ...Iceland. Iceland again. I love, I love, I love Iceland.
  • Interviewer: So you've been there, like-?
  • Ed: Once. But it was one of the best places I've ever been to.
  • Interviewer: Have you ever been to Finland?
  • Ed: Yeah. I've been to Finland, yeah. I think I played a small show in Finland once.
  • Interviewer: If you were in a boyband, what would the band's name be?
  • Ed: Wrong Direction.
  • Interviewer: [Laughs] Wrong Direction, I love that. What's the best piece of advice you've ever received?
  • Ed: Always be nice to people.
  • Interviewer: That's cool. It works out every time. If you could work with any artist in the world, who would it be?
  • Ed: Beyonce. Beyonce. I have worked with her before, but not on an original song.
  • Interviewer: Could you name three things that make you happy right now? This Wednesday.
  • Ed: Uh, my cats. Pictures of my cats. And hearing about my cats. I like my cats. Three things.
  • Interviewer: [Laughs] What's the biggest no-no purchase you've ever bought?
  • Ed: No-no? Astin Martin. Astin Martin, yeah. I only drove it a couple of times.
  • Interviewer: Really?! How much was it?
  • Ed: It wasn't cheap. I feel like, I felt... I got it, and I felt cool. And then I felt like an idiot. I don't think sports cars are for me.
  • Interviewer: Do you still have it?
  • Ed: I do still have it, yeah. I let my manager's wife drive it. She uses it.
  • China: Aiyaaah, its been an exhausting day today! Time to enjoy a nice, long relaxing bath~
  • Japan: Oh, China-San, you're using the bath right now? Then, I'll wait for my turn-
  • China: huh? It's fine, the bath is big enough to fit three people~
  • Japan: well, if you insist...
  • Hong Kong: Sensei, there you are- oh, can I join too?
  • China: um... okay, sure-
  • Macau: ah, this seems fun, I'll join as well~
  • China: um, wait, I don't think we can fit this many people-
  • South Korea: Hey why didn't anyone invite me?? Oh well~ CANON BALL!!!
  • China: AIYAAAH!! Okay, that's it, everyone out-
  • Taiwan: hey, what's all the fuss about?? Ooh, let me join in!!
  • China: TAIWAN NOOO!!!
  • Stephanie: I won't abandon you, Skulduggery. You say you don't need anyone? This is proof that you're lying. You want people to think you're a selfish bastard so that when they walk away, they won't know how badly they've hurt you. But I know it hurts, Skulduggery. No matter how much armour you put on, it still hurts.
  • Skulduggery: I really wish you were somebody else right now.
  • Stephanie: Why? Oh. Well, I'm not, but I'm here, so you're just going to have to make due.