i don't know who this dude is but i liked his quote

anonymous asked:

Who is Montparnasse? I guess give a quick bio? I've only seen the 2012 movie so I don't know much about him


In the Brick, Montparnasse is a member of Patron-Minette, a criminal gang which operates in Paris. He was a street urchin not unlike Gavroche, before a girl told him he was really handsome and since that day, Montparnasse resorted to crime in order to get himself pretty clothes (I swear I’m not making this up). Since he’s piss-poor and lazy as fuck, crime seemed like the best gig in order to get what he wants.

Okay, so random Montparnasse traits:

  • He’s vain. As fuck.
  • Lazy
  • Loyal
  • Fucking ExtraTM . Like, the guys goes everywhere with a red rose because?? He thinks he’s cool??
  • He’s a fucking dork oh my god he thinks he’s so cool but the guy got his ass kicked by a sixty yo dude like son, check yoself because u rek yourself
  • Edgelord
  • He likes Gavroche a lot.
  • He’s around 18/20 in the Brick
  • His character is written as very ambiguous. Very grey, if you will. Definitely not GOOD but definitely not a villain either. Hence the quote: “ He was kind, effeminate, graceful, robust, sluggish, ferocious” See the antithesis? (The original French text describes Montparnasse as “gentil” aka “kind” or “nice” while the English text translated it as “genteel” which doesn’t convey the same connotations and I’m HELLA SALTY ABOUT IT.)
  • Part of me is convinced that Montparnasse was written as a comic relief

Random Montparnasse facts:

  • Babet, one of his fellow associates, calls him “pretty boy” once
  • Has a swordcane
  • Gets robbed by Gavroche once
  • Has a sort of brotherly relationship with Gavroche, with Gav’ teasing him to no end
  • Refuses to speak argot (slang) because he wants to appear PROPER and DIGNIFIED (see the Edgelord entry)
  • Robber and assassin by night, dandy by day
  • Javert calls him a “Devilish Dandy” :’)

Anyway, I love my trash son

Guardians of the Galaxy Roleplay Sentence Starters
  • "You'll die! Why are you doing this? Why?"
  • "Well that's just as fascinating as the first 89 times you told me that."
  • "Well I tell you what, that's gonna wear real thin, real fast, bud."
  • " I just wanted to tell you how grateful I am that you've accepted me despite my blunders. It is good to once again be among friends."
  • "This dumb tree is also my friend."
  • "I have lived most of my life surrounded my enemies. I will be grateful to die among my friends."
  • "Aww, what the hell, I don't got that long a lifespan anyway... "
  • "Well now I'm standing. Happy? We're all standing now. Bunch of jackasses, standing in a circle."
  • "We've already established that you destroying the ship I'm on is not saving me!"
  • "That is the most real, authentic, hysterical laugh of my entire life."
  • "Finger on throat means death!"
  • "They got my dick message."
  • "His people are completely literal. Metaphors go over his head."
  • "That dude there. I need his prosthetic leg. "
  • "God knows I don't need the rest of him. Look at him. He's useless."
  • "Well, supposedly, these bald bodies find you attractive, so maybe you could work out some sort of trade."
  • "That's for if things get really hardcore. Or if you wanna blow up moons."
  • "You just wanna suck the joy out of everything."
  • "Who put the sticks up their butts?"
  • "I am going to die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy."
  • "Fine, but I can't promise when all of this is over I'm not going to kill every last one of you jerks."
  • "See, this is exactly why none of you have any friends!"
  • "Oh she has no idea. If I had a blacklight, this would look like a Jackson Pollock painting."
  • "You got issues."
  • "He thinks I'm some stupid thing! He does!"
  • " I didn't ask to be torn apart and put back together over and over and turned into some little monster!"
  • "When I look around, you know what I see? Losers."
  • "You're an imbecile."
  • "I can't believe I got taken down by a raccoon."
  • "Raccoon? What's a raccoon?"
  • "Ain't no thing like me, except me!"
  • "We're just like Kevin Bacon."
  • "I live for the simple things... like how much this is going to hurt!"
  • "Dance-off, bro. Me and you."
  • "I like your knife, I'm keeping it."
  • "Oh, I was just kidding about the leg. I just need these two things."
  • "He said that he may be an... a-hole. But he's not, and I quote, 100% a dick".
  • "Well, I don't know if I believe anyone is 100% a dick."
  • "Let's see if you can laugh after five or six good shots in your freakin' face!"
  • "Creepy little beast!"
  • "I don't learn. One of my issues."
  • "Look at this thing. It thinks it's so cool. It's not cool to ask for help! Walk by yourself, you little gargoyle!"
  • "Hooked on a Feeling, Blue Swede! That song belongs to me!"
  • "Hold on a second, you're being serious right now?"
  • "I can't believe I'm taking orders from a hamster."
  • "You're a good looking girl. You should try to be more nice to people."

anonymous asked:

so i just discovered your fic list and oh gawd u don't know how happy i am with this discovery. thank u for this. anyway i just finished reading ur alternate meets canon fic and. i want to roll and jump and. oh my gawd i really wanna know what happened next?? do u have some other headcanons/ideas for this? is it ok with u to divulge them? no pressure if u don't want to though! just really wanted to thank u for it! i adore alternates meeting with canons so it was really a joy to read. thank u!


Oh anon, thank you <3 I loved the idea for that fic, had plans for it floating in my head for months before the ask got me to write it down. It was going to be this huge epic, like 100k words probably, switching between Derek and alt!Stiles in the canon universe and Stiles trying to make sense of the warped landscape of the alternate world he’d been thrown into. 

Derek’s just standing there in his bedroom doorway, looking softer than Stiles has ever seen him: his hair loose and ungelled, hanging over his forehead.

“Hey Derek,” he says, trying to blink his way back from the visual. “You look…”

“What?” He seems totally lost on what’s making Stiles stare, and after a few seconds Stiles decides not to even try explaining it. You look nice keeps running through his head, but that’s not close enough. It’s not that Derek never looks nice. (Hell, Derek always looks nice, but that’s a whole other issue.) He looks happy sometimes too, and that’s the only other word Stiles can pull up that edges close to accurate. You’re in my bedroom is the third, half-formed option, but that’s happened before too. It’s just something about the combination of those things right now, and the comfortable way he’s standing in the space  –– hands not in his pockets, shoulders not slumping in like he’s offended by the general pressure of someone else’s air –– that’s catching Stiles up. And there’s no way to fit any of that into words.

“You’ve got flour on your shirt,” he says instead, and Derek glances down with a soft laugh. Brushes the powder off so it wafts out in a soft cloud between them. The open smile he’s wearing when he looks up again is enough to make Stiles heart tug with how devastatingly dreamlike this all is.

“I was making breakfast,” he answers, and Stiles blinks. Ok, yeah. So, definitely a dream.

I had an entire timeline listed out for the alternate universe –– how things had all gone differently, in a chain reaction starting with Laura surviving Peter’s attack (link to that scene, if you’re interested) and just cascading outward, through the fracturing of Scott and Stiles’ friendship when a very human Scott was lured into the Argent side of the divide (via his interest in Allison and, ironically, concern for Stiles and the dangers of “vicious werewolves”) and Stiles sided with Laura and Derek. 

“Wait… I still got with Allison, even if I wasn’t…”

“You two are so together it’s disgusting, alright? Apparently she hit a dog with her car and you guys got to know each other at the animal clinic and right after that you two were like, destined. A week in I could see like… wedding bells and white picket fences going on in your head. It was obnoxious and I was thrilled for you, dude. And then all the hunter crap happened.”

How Laura being alive kept Derek from being quite as dark and broken as he was in the first few seasons, how she made the executive decision to bring the Sheriff in early to earn his trust and support against hunters and supernatural threats alike, and how the town more or less broke down into a cold war zone between the werewolf and hunter sides of the conflict.

The tragedy is that somewhere in all that planning and preparation my detailed notes and timeline completely vanished. I have no idea how. Pages of details and alt!character development and plot planning… and all I have left is a page or so of scenes and stray quote segments, and I just don’t remember enough about the details to make it the way it originally would have. I can tell you a few details, though, and maybe throw in a few of the excerpts too.

I know that it still took a long time for Stiles and Derek to come together. Stiles had sided with the werewolves mainly because Laura had come to the Sheriff (and the Sheriff, remembering the fire and the lost kids the Hales had been when he’d told them the news, and appreciating finally being handed answers to all the mysteries that don’t quite add up in this town, agreed to work with them at least to stop Peter… and then the bond just built from there), and because it had been the right thing to do. And Derek wasn’t shattered the way he was in canon season one maybe, but he was still Derek. Laura’s skeptical, snarky, and untrusting little brother, the cynic to her careful optimism. And Stiles is sarcastic and blunt and, in this version of reality, also hurt and bitter from losing his best friend to the enemy, so he wasn’t exactly super open to bonding with one of the reasons Scott wasn’t around anymore. (It was easier to forgive Laura, who was more sympathetic, but Derek’s general if he sided with hunters he’s not worth having around anyway attitude did not help relations early on.) Stiles and Derek butted heads and snarked constantly at first but their alliance against Peter and the hunters, various life-or-death situations, and Laura’s friendship with the Sheriff (especially when he took her on as a deputy), kept them close, and eventually they fell together just like they’re always going to.

Beacon Hills is a constant danger zone, though, because the hunter threat still hasn’t died. Scott reaches out to Stiles from time to time, earnestly believing every Argent lie that wolves are dangerous monsters and that Stiles is going to get himself killed for being with them. But he’s basically a hunter at this point, believes their philosophy because he’s been on the Argents’ side in every showdown, and honestly thinks Stiles and the Sheriff have been seduced by the Hales’ supernatural wiles (Kate has indoctrinated Scott and Allison with a very different version of her history with Derek) and he needs to do whatever he can to save his former best friend from them.

“Scott’s not a werewolf?”

“What?” Stiles starts to laugh, before his brows arch sharply. “Oh my god, you’re serious. No. No, Scott’s practically married in with the Argents; he’d probably kill himself if he got the bite.” Bitterness floods his features; he fights and fails to smooth it away.

And Stiles is wounded and bitter and cuts off any attempt at contact from his old friend because they’ve both chosen their sides, there’s too much bad blood, and thinking about Scott as anything more than the enemy or the creep who’s allied with killers is too painful at this point.

Lydia’s also in with the Argents, from virtue of being Allison’s best friend and having been smart enough to catch on after a couple months that something decidedly supernatural was going on. She’s a very different Lydia, though, having never had her banshee powers awakened (she was never bitten by Alpha!Peter because… well, there was no Alpha!Peter) and is likely still more similar to her pre-Peter-possession self. I had a lot more details about all of the side characters and how they fit into the developing arc, but most of it’s sadly lost now.

Furry Roommates

Pairing: Arthur Ketch x Reader
Word count: 1,123
Warnings: Fluff. Out of character Ketch. Borderline Crack fic.
Written for my 2,000 Followers Celebration
Requested by: @leliannah Prompt: Cats / Quote: “I may have accidently sorta adopted five cats” 

Authors Note: So I had every intention of making this a crack fic with these prompts and this character, but when I was done it came out more fluffy.  So it’s a fluffy/semi-crack fic.  Enjoy !

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Different Kind of Love

@casbabydontgoineedyou - congrats on your 1k, lovely!
This is for your challenge. As discussed, the only supernatural reference is the fact that Jensen Ackles is in this.
Thank you to my brilliant friend @whispersandwhiskerburn for being a marvelous Beta. Angel is a delight to work with, and I say work with because she really puts her all in to making sure you’re delivering the best you can. Hope you like the ending(ish), Angel - it’s for you!

A/N: This is gonna be interesting if you haven’t watched Ten Inch Hero or aren’t familiar with the actors names - but you’ll figure it out, I’m sure… good luck.
Prompt: I can’t believe you’re not in the mood to argue.
Warnings: fluff, confusion, awkwardness…
Summary: While filming on the set of Ten Inch Hero, YN longs to catch the eye of a cast mate… but will another get in the way?

Originally posted by jensengifsdaily

“You know he has his eye on Danneel, right?” Clea whispered, nudging my shoulder and following my gaze towards the two actors who were currently flirting. I gave a short hmph and turned my attention to Clea, glaring.
“YN.” Johnny called, probably looking to go over lines or something. I raised an eyebrow at Clea and left her looking confused.
“What’s up?” He pulled me under his arm as I approached, trapping me in a headlock. I wrapped my arms around his waist, complying and going with it so he couldn’t throw me off balance.
“Thought I’d save you.” He said, ruffling my hair and laughing as I tightened my grip around him in a tight retaliatory bear hug that made him grunt.
“Save me? Is that what you call this?” I asked, pushing against him, wrestling to get him off me.
“I see you’re staring again.” He muttered, loosening his grip, stumbling forward when I pushed him in the back, freeing my head.
“And? A girl can look!” I defended, flattening my hair and glancing back at my cast mates, Jensen and Danneel.
“You’re gonna get caught looking one day, kid.” He warned quietly. I rolled my eyes and punched his arm.
“And maybe that’s when we fall madly in love!” I gave him the cheesiest smile I could.
“I can’t believe you’re not in the mood to argue!” Johnny teased, trying to poke my side as I swatted at him, the smile still in place.
“Lines?” I asked, not-so-subtly changing the topic and pulling him toward the table in the small cafe set.

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anonymous asked:

I don't see why anyone likes you you're a piece of crap

I know right. Even I think that about myself :D matter of fact there are tons of reasons to Hate me which I’ve said several times before so lets count em down ^u^

Reasons to Dislike JaxBlade :)

I’m Overly Optimistic….like annoyingly so at times. I look at the glass Half Full and my lifes been crappy but I always see the good. A lot of pessimist people I met don’t like me cause they think I’m fake but hey Most of the time this is me appreciating the good times though to lead into my next one.

I can be a tad emo at times.…There are times where i feel like my friends dont like me at all, I’m burden to them and they are just being polite especially if we go long bouts without talking and i feel all alone and depressed and Kinda clingly. Luckily Im working on that day by day

I can be a Bit Cocky and Arrogant at times. I’m proud of my body and like to show it off cause I used to be fat and seeing myself improve eveyday gives me a slight ego boost and I like to show off.

I can be a such an Attention Whore: In so many areas xD especially If I’m at a place I like to be center of attention and take off my shirt to show off even though

I have mediocre results for a fitness person: I’ve working out since I was 16 and I’ve barely added that much mass to my frame. Speed and Strength have skyrocketed since back then but I’ve been working out Damn near 10 years and my physique honestly isnt that impressive even though I like to gloat

I’m kind of a Perv Not like peeking through windows and stealing womens under-roos but I love women, I love booty and I love breasts. I love the concept of an hour glass woman with curves in all the right places and thats the primary stuff of my Special blog

I can be the Biggest Dick if you’re an Asshole to my friends: when people insult me I gotta thank all those years of bully beatings for giving me tough skin cause i can get on but if someones fucking with a friend of mine or someone close I become like a fuckin supervillain and If they are out of shape and being an ass to my friends I let lose and break their self esteem. Luckily with all the meditation I do now I dont do that as much and focus on my day

I’m indifferent on a lot of things that people get upset over: Like a lot of people can be pissed off and ask me my opinion and Im usually like “yeah that sucks” and they get mad at me cause I’m like Meh. The last time i remember that was that Dear Fat people video that a lot of people bashed and while I personally didnt agree with how she was saying her message as a person who was beaten up and fat shamed and used that as motivation to get in shape. It honestly didnt bother me that much and I didnt think anything of it but a few people got mad at me cause they thought i was promoting fat shaming with my indifference

I’m all for Gay people and their rights: so Some people may call me a “Fag lover” or something cause Im supportive of the gay community BUT i do know something about me. I was at one of my Best friends’ , since we were 14, Wedding 2 years ago he’s gay and been that way since he said he was 12, and I met his husband there and his husband was cool and an awesome dude and I thought they were great. But when they said “Kiss the Bride” I looked away. and I notice I do that a lot when I hang out with my gay friends marcus and kevin and they kiss I just look away. I’m happy that they are happy and in love but seeing two men kiss makes me a lil uncomfortable SO I HAVE to work on myself to be a bit more liberal

I’m Black: so Racists hate me just cause of the melanin in my skin so theres that

The Brony thing: I used to be a Hardcore brony back in 2011-2012 till I dropped the term and now Im just a casual fan of the show. So Some people can dislike me because I watched it and others call me a poser and fake cause im in my Buddy Racebest’s Bronies React videos but i dont use the term brony for myself anymore since im just a casual fan of the show so theres that.

I Prefer Dubbed over Subbed anime

I’m kind of a Man whore

I’ve Lied to the ones I loved the most and the ones I was closest to because I was scared that they’d leave If somethings wrong with me I usually laugh it off and kind of do a Lie of omission if someone asks. So I need to work on being more open to people who care about me

I dont like the Pixar film Up xD and some people have legit told me they hate me for that and unfollowed me

I Quote my Bullying story a Sickening amount for Motivation and Inspiration for people.

I like seeing Criminals and bad people in general die in horrible ways and think they should be put down for the count instead of imprisoned.

If its not Fitness, Health, Exercise, Anime, Cartoon, Comic stuff I can be considered borderline retarded at points

I can be Overbearingly Overcaring for people I care about at points that I come off as Irritatingly clingy


And theres a WHOOOOOOOLE Lot More that I openly admit and all I can do is acknowledge it and work on bettering myself like a Redemption Arc Yeah like Kenshin when he went from Battosai to Heroic Samurai or Vegeta mass murdering warrior to Lovable Family Guy. Its gonna take some time but I’m willing to work on it But I’ve already accepted all my faults so I can use them to better myself

anonymous asked:

Yo person *throws gang signs* (what the fuck am I doing with my life) Can you do headcanons of the RFA(including V) and Saeran reacting to MC being in a well known all girls KPOP group and she's like the main rapper and lead singer or some shit? Or just being a famous singer if you don't know KPOP? Have an magical day~ *aggressively throws glitter in face*



  • what did he jUST SEE???
  • WAS THAT MC ON TV!?!!??11?!
  • okay but tbh he wasn’t into kpop that much since he was too busy gaming all the time but OMG
  • dude he literally starts like memorizing all the members of her group, then binge watches Weekly Idol, MBC and Mnet performances, LOL HE EVEN DOES THOSE KOREABOO/ALLKPOP QUIZZES THAT ARE ALL “which member is your soul mate?”
    • gets salty when it’s not MC aww
  • surprises his honey by attending her fanmeet 
  • “Jagiya, can you sign my photobook?” ^-^


  • bro he was so proudddddd
  • impossible that he didn’t know of her what even was he doing with his life
  • right, he was practicing 24/7 I mean he didn’t know Echo Girl either soooo
  • anyways he starts watching MC’s performances and stuff and all is good UNTIL HE SEES WHAT MC WEARS HOLY SHIT
  • he cannot control his fanboying like omfg who knew MC looked like that under her sweater????
  • calls director to give him contacts to the stylist of MC’s group
  • he’s got quite a few complains and suggestions


  • I mean she respects MC’s career choice
  • she’s actually happy for MC, since she can do the thing she’s passionate about
  • but boy is she concerned when she hears news about saesangs
  • those bitches are C R A Z Y (not as crazy as Jaehee is for MC though)
  • she requests that Jumin send security guards to MC’s company specifically for MC’s group
  • for that, she sacrificed her spring break (luv u Jaehee bb :’))
  • despite her busy schedule, she tries to go to most of MC’s live performances though!! 
  • also buys official merch to support MC too


  • legit had no idea that MC was famous
  • “k-pop is not my style” - Jumin Han, 2016
    • props if you can identify the reference of this quote 
  • okay but think about it though like Mr. Corporate heir is really busy he has no time for celebrity gossip
  • how did he find out?
  • anyways he doesn’t really care but he does ask MC about all the details when he sees her
  • sample questions:
    • what is “Show! Music Core”? 
    • “Mnet”? so what like a net shaped like a M and you go there for what? fishing? I used to go fishing too - but golfing is less dirty.
    • also what do you mean “random play dance” that isn’t even a cohesive sentence.
  • low key goes to her performances after he realizes what SBS Inkigayo is 
    • let’s be real though how low key can you be when you buy the whole middle section of the seats and is surrounded by 20 security guards


  • dude he already knew
  • remember that background check?
  • anyways is a total fanGURL
  • hacks fansites so that all of MC’s group content is spread like a virus loloolol
  • dude he is a no shame fangirl but he is also a 200% proud boyfriend
  • makes couple t-shirts that he forces MC to wear for airport fashion (a new one every time)
  • LOL the world cannot believe MC is dating a doofus like him but there are no haters because he’s kinda really funny
  • the memes on the back of the couple tees are hilarious
  • yea but I thought he was a secret agent and blah blah can’t be known
  • he’s got different identities mate


  • okay so he didn’t know until Seven told him and ngl he was kinda mad
  • why did he have to find out from his idiot brother?
  • argued with MC about her honesty and felt betrayed
  • he is sensitive ok
  • so MC doesn’t get it and basically it becomes quiet between them
  • RFA doesn’t know what to do damn
  • Saeran doesn’t admit it but he misses MC when she moved back to her group dorm so he secretly goes to her performances
  • it’s not his fault but he looks a little sketch so the security asked him to leave the facility once 
  • he got SO mad omg
  • ofc MC overheard him screaming from backstage 
  • so MC comes out and tells security it’s okay
  • cue backstage make-up making out ;))


  • he found out hearing it from Seven freak the hell out over a phone call
  • he was pretty excited and even told seven he wanted to watch her perform
  • watch
  • oops
  • he was kinda sad about it but he didn’t say anything
  • MC noticed he was acting funny but when she confronted him about it he didn’t spill
  • she called Seven and he spilled the beans immediately
  • you know what MC did????
  • she surprised V with a private performance
  • do as you may with your imagination (I didn’t say anything ;))

heh. thanks for reading, I hope I didn’t let down my fellow kpop fans xD

~Cherry L.

Masterpost: click here

Askbox/Requests: click here

The Signs as Quotes from My Capricorn Friend Sarah (@sharks-are-0k)
  • Aries: "I'm getting my house-building urges again. You know about those."
  • Taurus: "I am this close to screaming… at myself. For looking through the train porn tag."
  • Gemini: "Oh, Maaaary Lincoln. I know her."
  • Cancer: "Look, dude. Does it look like I have cash flowin' outta these pockets? I can't just buy your geode. I have to ask my mom."
  • Leo: "I'm changing my name to Eggs Benedict."
  • Virgo: "He's bad at… everything. Like, that he tries to do."
  • Libra: "Kill them. Don't do that. Call them."
  • Scorpio: "Take my titty… and fuck off."
  • Sagittarius: "Boo wasn't IN Monsters University, you FAKE FAN!"
  • Capricorn: "So you know what? You know what? [The Green Club] CRUSHED Mr. Quartana's favorite mushroom and I had had ENOUGH. So I staged a coup."
  • Aquarius: "If you put googly eyes on Mr. Potato Head, doesn't it like… fuck with his spirit mesh?"
  • Pisces: "Oh, he's one of those guys who has like four Facebook profile pictures throughout his entire lifetime. Maybe we'll see his evolution."

anonymous asked:

Okay, so kids can be reeeeeally too curious for their own good, so I can imagine them one day just. Walking up to one of the Sanses and pulling up their shirt. They don't do this to a Papyrus because they're too tall to reach. XD

Too cute an idea not to do headcanons for. Sorry if I went a little angsty for some of them. 

UT!Sans: He’s just minding his own business, trying to get the damn registrar in order. Normally Boss does this but Edge is trying to get the other’s to “take responsibility” or something. In his view the one doing the paperwork should be the one who knows what the hell they’re doing, but then Boss isn’t exactly in the business of asking for other people’s opinions. 

As usual a couple of the kids are coming and going. He has a pretty open door policy on his office and a lot of them like to come mess around with some of his more child-friendly science equipment. Currently, its Melody, sitting quietly and playing with the Newton Cradle. 

Finally he gets into a rhythym, absorbed in his work. Out of the corner of his eye he sees Melody get up and move behind him, but he’s not worried. There’s nothing dangerous in his office, he’s made sure of it. And his attentions a little too absorbed at the moment…..

A sudden tug on his shirt and WOAH  is it drafty in here or is it just him?

Melody has his shirt almost over his head and is staring curiously at his ribcage. Sans chuckles nervously. “Uh, heh…not gonna lie, kid, that took a lot of spine.”

Melody gives him a disgusted look and drops his shirt.

“Aw, come on, that was a real rib-tickler”

“I’m leaving.” Melody said rolling her eyes and walking out. A second apssed, and she stuck her head in the doorway again. “And I’m not coming back!”

Sans chuckled to himself and got back to work.

UF!Sans: Red grumbles to himself as he walked around. Okay, he’s always doing that, but this particular hour of the day made it more audible than not. Recess, a full hour of the little fuckers running around in every direction. It had been someone’s bright idea to stick him with near permanent monitor duty of this, the idea being that he had faster instincts than most of them, he would be able to get there fast if someone was about to hurt themselves. It was, he had informed them, not that hard. All it required was you had to remove your head from your own fucking pelvis, and you’d be set to stop the little idiots from throwing themselves off the building.

Blue and Papyrus weren’t thrilled. And it didn’t matter in the end. So here he was, prowling the edge of the yard, trying to prevent snotnoses from getting cuts and bruises. Leeroy, as always, followed him like a shadow. A shadow that talked too much. 

“Hey! Hey, Red, can I see your rib cage?”



“Cause I said so, that’s why.” His eyes were trained on Yoshi. The little klutz was insisting on climbing one of the jungle gyms. Undyne also had her eye on it, but if the fish couldn’t get there in time he’d have to use his magic.

“But I wannaaaaa”

“Tough shit” Red muttered. But faster than he could blnk the kid was in front of him and jerking his shirt over his head.


The reaction is instantaneous. His eye lights up with magic and he practically jumps away while shoving the kid off. Harder than he would have meant to in any other situation. Leeroy yells in surprise and looks at him with wide, slightly scared eyes while Red breathes hard trying to get a handle on himself. His hands are shaking and he can’t get the glow in his eye to fade.

“What the fuck were you thinking?!”


“Don’t do shit like that!” He’s yelling now, and other eyes are on them. Undyne seems pissed at first but it changes to a look of concern when she sees how bad he looks.

“I…..I’m sorry.”

The anger hollows him out and he’s doing his best to convince himself that its different, he’s not in danger, it was just a fucking kid., but his body doesn’t know that, it just knows for a brief moment it was exposed. In the end he mutters “its fine” and stalks off. Undyne has Sans cover his shift, and nobody says anything about it. For once even Boss doesn’t chew him out for walking out. 

Leeroy walks on eggshells around him for a few weeks, and Red finds a hand-written, poorly spelled apology note in his office. 

US!Sans: “Woah, Undyne!” Bryn said, mouth open and eyes staring in awe.”That so many muscles!”

“Fuhuhu! Of course!” Undyne grinned, hands planted firmly on her hips as her crop-top showed her eight-pack in its full glory. “I’d have to after all the training I do!” She flexed on of her powerful biceps and kissed it while the kids stared at her in awe.


“Pfft, wha? Alph I’ll believe, but you do not have an eight-pack, dude.”


The kids looked confused. “But….you’re a skeleton.” Yoshi said. 

“THAT….THAT DOESN’T MATTER!” Blue said, but there was a faint cyan tinge that betrayed the bluff.

“Well, let’s see then!” Bryn said, hiking his shirt over his head before he could say a word. 

“That’s just an rib cage!” Leeroy said.

There was a blue glow of his magic and an ecto-stomach formed, eight-pack in place.

Melody huffed. “Magic tummies don’t count.”

Blue yanked his shirt out of Bryn’s hands, blushing. “ITS RUDE TO LIT UP A SKELETON’S SHIRT WITHOUT PERMISSION!”

Undyne took pity on the skeleton. “Eh, sure they count. Alright, let’s play some soccer!”

SF!Sans: Billie knew that if he was going to continue to be the rival of the Bratlord, he would require some intel. Chandler had told him once about this famous quote: “If you know the enemy and you know yourself, you need not fear the results of a hundred battles”. Well, he was pretty sure he knew himself, so all that was left was his enemy. 

He had been sneaking around Rasp for almost the entirety of freetime, watching him carefully for any weaknesses. He wasn’t sure what kind of weaknesses, but there had to be something. 

In the end, though, he was starting to get impatient. Bratlord didn’t have any soft fleshy bits that he could hit when they fought. Just hard bones that hurt Billie’s hand. Not that he would admit it. Superheroes and lawmen didn’t get hurt. Especially not by their worst enemies. 

Suddenly he remember last wekk, when Blue summoned a magic stomach on the soccerfield. Was it possible that Rasp had one too? That would make it a lot easier to fight him……Only one way to be sure. He waited until Rasp was distracted by something, and then ran up to him, yanking his shirt up over his head. 

Nothing. Just an empty rib cage. Billie huffed in disapointment an let teh shirt fall. 

The second he did he realized Rasps eyelights had vanished and he had frozen. Before he could say anything though, they cam back and he was immediately bak to posturing. “TRYING TO EXAMINE ME FOR WEAKNESSES? I CAN’T SAY I BLAME YOU, MY RIVAL, BUT YOU’LL FIND YOURSELF WOEFULLY DISAPPOINTED. I HAVE NONE!” Despite the usual arrogant tone, there was a quaver to his voice and  Billie noticed his hands were shaking slightly.

Rasp caught him staring at his hands and so clasped them behind his back.” I-I THINK I HEAR BLUE CALLING FOR HELP” and he scampered off. 

Syrup explained it to him later. A skeleton’s SOUL is in his ribcage, and its a remarkably unprotected area. All someone would have to do  was reach up the cavity and they would have a hold of it, and would be able to kill them. This had happened to him and Rasp more than once Underground, and they were pretty naturally defensive about their rib cages being uncovered. 

Billie never apologizes, per se, but he never tries to reach under the shirt again. He will even stop their “battles” in the middle if Bratlord’s shirt flies up and won’t start again until he can cover himself. Its a little embarrassing for Rasp but in a way he appreciates the child’s sense of honor. 

The Fundamentals of Caring starter sentences

71 starters
feel free to change gender pronouns
content warning: cussing, sexual themes

  • “I cannot take care of another unless I first take care of myself.”
  • “_____, come on. I know you’re in there.”
  • “My needs are equal to the needs of the person to whom I am giving care.”
  • “All I can do is try my best and maintain a positive attitude.”
  • “Just always remember: ALOHA. Ask, Listen, Observe, Help, Ask again.”
  • “I like helping people.”
  • “Sorry. My child has a unique sense of humor.”
  • “I’ve been out of work for a while and I could really use this job.”
  • “Yeah, but if we’re gonna throw down nine bucks an hour for somebody to wipe my ass, we need somebody who knows how to wipe an ass.”
  • “You’re being rude.”
  • “Why are you doing this to me?”
  • “It’s been two and a half years. What’s the magic number where you wake up and you’re finally ready? Six years? Eight? Eighty?”
  • “Would you tap that? Because I would pound that shit into the ground.”
  • “Could you call the Make-A-Wish foundation and tell them I want a blowjob from Katy Perry?”
  • “What is this gem, you ask? This is a map of your precious country’s lamest roadside attractions, odd museums, bizarre landmarks, and of course anything giant, from farm animals to cherry pie.”
  • “I have some fantastic news. I need to take a dump.”
  • “Who do you think would win in a fight to the death, me or a bird?”
  • “I enjoy this time together.”
  • “If you woke up and you were totally… fine… what’s the thing you’d wanna do most?”
  • “If somebody tries to rob the bank today, don’t be a hero.”
  • “Did you arrange these to look like large testicles and a small penis?”
  • “I wrote a couple novels you’ve never heard of.”
  • “So, what is this? Is this, like, research for you?”
  • “When you do write about me, I want you to describe me as handsome and cool. The best stuff is truthful.”
  • “Have you been working with lead-based paint in an enclosed area?”
  • “Come on. Don’t you get bored just sitting in this room and going to the park once a week?”
  • “I mean, doesn’t any part of you want to see the world’s deepest pit in person, not just on TV?”
  • “I didn’t realize you had a father.”
  • “So you don’t even read those?”
  • “Really? We’re still going on about this?”
  • “What’s with you today?”
  • “It was his choice, not mine. He can live with it. Let’s leave it at that.”
  • “A father’s supposed to be there for his kid. Protect him from harm. That’s the only job a father has.”
  • “There we go. Now go get me some juice.”
  • “I can’t have you making promises you can’t keep.”
  • “You think because you’re in a wheelchair that gives you the right to do and say whatever you want?”
  • “You ever considered that maybe I’m just a prick, with or without the wheelchair?”
  • “Is that the best you can do? That’s it? I thought you were a writer.”
  • “I don’t buy any of your bullshit. You can make jokes all you want, but you are wasting your life by sitting in this house and watching TV.”
  • “Honestly, what were you thinking?”
  • “It was very heroic how you jumped in there without missing a beat.”
  • “I want a text or a phone call every three hours.”
  • “ ‘He died trying to see the world’s biggest pit’ is a really bad obituary.”
  • “Dude, were you—? Were you just doing air quotes? Don't—don’t ever do that again.”
  • “Let me see if there’s any food in there I can actually eat.”
  • “Well, I thought it was good to get straight to the point.”
  • “I’m in a fucking wheelchair, okay? I could spew Shakespeare shit and a girl like that’s not gonna be interested in me.”
  • “Fuck you, you’re a [insert age]-year-old ass-wiper.”
  • “See, I knew the open road would be good for you.”
  • “Would you quit screwing around? I’m driving.”
  • “Don’t ever do that again! You scared the shit out of me!”
  • “We came to see a giant cow. We’re going to see a giant cow.”
  • “Hey, what the fuck? That’s mine.”
  • “I just… Here’s the thing. I don’t know what I’m talking about.”
  • “You know, when I get home, I’m gonna put you on the roadside attractions map. World’s biggest dick.”
  • “Oh, shit. Are you a pervert?”
  • “Yeah, it’s total bullshit. And on a stick. Like the world’s least delicious lollipop.”
  • “Man, I am starving. I think there’s an all-night diner across the street. What do you think?”
  • “Are you asking me on a date?”
  • “Dude, you were like James Bond there! That was the most badass thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”
  • “I knew one of your spells would kill me.”
  • “I told you, I only date assholes.”
  • “What’s it like being a parent?”
  • “Every corny thing you’ve ever heard about having a kid is completely and utterly true.”
  • “I thought I’d like it ‘cause it’s lame, but it’s actually pretty cool.”
  • “Did you steal this, _____?”
  • “Please don’t call me that.”
  • “He’s a heaping mess, but… he’s my heaping mess.”
  • “Life’s a real class-A bitch, isn’t it?”
  • “Well, take care of yourself in [insert city]. There are a lot of perverts there.”
  • “Would you just do me a favor and shut the fuck up for once in your life?”

anonymous asked:

If you really do think that Management or whoever fake the baby certificate and STILL forcing Louis and Harry to be closeted against their will, why don't you Larries actually do something to really help? Posting and reblogging stuff on tumblr is not it. Call the authorities. Actually do something y'know? I mean they fake a birth certificate, they could go to jail for that. Closeting them against their will, blackmailing are human's right issues. Hello?

I mean…I know I was just quoted in a magazine saying that I believe two closeted celebrities are communicating gay history to their fans through teddy bears, but you sound ridiculous. 

No one is going to jail for anything, okay? That’s not how this is going to play out because the people controlling it have a lot of money. If you want the source of the problem, follow the money as Deep Throat said in the film (but not actually in real life I found out the other week when I was watching an interview with Bernstein). 

This situation is unfortunate but not one that anyone is doing with a gun to their head. Whilst probably aggressively undesirable to everyone involved (besides the gold-digging™ women profiting from it), this is ultimately something that could have been avoided, but at a huge cost. 

Going back to our analysis of “What A Feeling” from yesterday, the lyrics are extremely important in the context of what’s happening right now.

If you believe, as I do, that there is a massive fucking piece of the puzzle missing here in terms of what the hell is happening behind the scenes then it’s important that you understand that “whatever change” is holding them back is something they believe in enough to be actively participating in these stunts. 

I do not log onto tumblr dot com every day to incite some kind of Gay Teddy Bear Revolution. Nor should people feel burdened with the task of “freeing” anyone. I don’t think anyone should feel any kind of self-importance in this matter because at the end of the day it does not come down to anyone but a couple of millionaire dudes who love each other trying to break free from another millionaire guy who is trying to ruin their careers. If they’ve got enough money to by a fuckin teddy bear a Rolex and an iPhone then I’m sure they have enough money to hire people who will properly advise them on what to do without anyone ratting out this sketchiness to the po po. 

And how would that conversation with the police go exactly? “Uh yeah, hi. Police? It’s me, a blogger from the world wide web. I just wanted to let you know that I have been analysing some badly photoshopped pictures of Louis Tomlinson and come to the conclusion that there is no way he put his p-bomb in a v-bomb and created a child so please go and arrest someone for falsifying a birth certificate and besmirching the good name of the Ventura County records office. Thank you, goodbye.” I don’t think so, pal.

I will blog about whatever the fuck I want to blog about be it Babygate, puppies or that hilarious video of the girl laughing at the article about a “satanic doll” that was actually Jar Jar Binks. 

Get off your fuckin high horse and wait it out like the rest of us. 

Here’s a funny story

This hydralisk is trash, anyone who knows me shouldn’t be surprised by this just by the content of this blog and the spam that I post when YOI drops a new episode. 

Now let me tell you about a precious cinnamon roll of a person that I recently stumbled upon. @yuurivoice I discovered this man I wanna say close to a week ago (I think, don’t quote me on that but I know it was before ep. 7) in the what could be the most embarrassing way possible. 

The first audio clip I listened to from him and now my personal favorite was the Yuri power bottom clip…while waiting for my cousin to get off work..it the parking lot of an office building. I forgot that my phone was connected to the car bluetooth and realized way too late that the audio was comming through the speakers since I was talking to my mother before through my headphones. And anyone who knows me IRL knows that I like my music loud. 

Needless to say I was completely red by the end and was lucky as hell that my cousin didn’t come out until well after the audio was over. 

This man is a treasure and the swarm would love to send him all the hugs and cakes I could and deserves every good thing that comes too him. Even if it means turning completely red with a giggly stupid grin on my face by his NSFW audio. 

  • Sakuya: I'm confused. That actually sounded like a good idea.
  • Otogiri: But Tsubaki said it.
  • Sakuya: I know.
  • Sakuya: [punches Tsubaki]
  • Tsubaki: What the hell was that for?
  • Sakuya: I don't know. I thought I was dreaming so I punched you in the face to make sure.
  • Tsubaki: Sakuya, when you think you're dreaming you don't punch somebody else. You get somebody else to pinch you.
  • Sakuya: Dude, it doesn't matter what kind of dream I'm having, I am not gonna ask you to pinch me.

what-may-be-perceived  asked:

My very best friend, who is a horrible atrocious person with no soul, duped me into reading Turn of the Story. It was very funny. I stayed up till 4 in the morning reading it, although I did not finish for 4 days. Since Elliot has no parents, Alastair Hunt should just adopt him. Then Call and he can gripe about their blond idiots, whom they are Totally NotTM gay for, together. There's one thing I don't understand, though. When Elliot came out of the lake, who initiated the kiss? Him or Dale?

FRIENDS, THIS IS A NIGHT OF SEXINESS. I will answer this sexy question publicly so all those who may have wondered about it know the answer!

However I feel as there is mention of another novel, I should make things clear for those potentially confused.

My fair questioner references the Magisterium series, written by Holly Black and Cassandra Clare, two writers who I know vaguely. (I like them okay.)

(Pulitzer Finalist Kelly Link, Cassandra Clare, Holly Black, me, AN OWL!!!!!!! Maybe I like all the people in this picture more than okay. They brought me owls.)

I think Magisterium is a most excellent series. I love me a trainee in a world of magic–as featured in Narnia, many Tamora Pierce novels, many Neil Gaiman novels, the Prydain Chronicles, The Dark Is Rising series, also Harry Potter, a series many people enjoy which is totally understandable because it has owls in. And Magisterium engages with the tropes of Magic Trainee books in a very fun way–okay, the Evil Lord will Come Again, but how? (oh dear god, thinks the unsuspecting reader, I was not expecting that to be how!) Also, Call Hunt, the hero of the novels (his father is, as above, called Alastair) is hellbent on avoiding his magic destiny and very suspicious of magic. Picture someone who might mace Gandalf. 

As they are middle grade novels, there is not a lot of sexy business in these books. As I am a dyed in the wool deviant, I just make up a ton of romance and try to make Holly and Cassie put it in. (They never listen.) I firmly believe that all Call’s friends have a crush on him. Aaron, his blond best friend who always thinks the best of him. Tamara, his best friend with dark braids who critiques him for his own good. Jasper, his frenemy-on-good-days. Celia, who totally made out with his face. (I feel on firm ground with Celia.) I definitely ship Calron, Calmara, Casper (the finest ship name!) and Callia. 

Who knows which relationship will become canon. Maybe you will find out in the Bronze Key, which comes out in three days! Maybe not. (I know already, but I cannot tell you because if I did Holly and Cassie would lock me up away from light and owls.)

Anyway, that is what Magisterium is, and who Call and Alastair Hunt are! 

Turn of the Story is an online novel written by moi. (Thank you for reading, fair questioner, and I am glad you liked.) It is also about a trainee in a world of magic, but it goes in a different direction away from evil lords to how diplomacy might work with a ton of elves and mermaids and harpies not getting along and a protagonist who feels he has been sold a Magical Worlds Bill of Goods and would like to complain strongly. There is quite a bit of sexy business in this novel. It is not a middle grade novel. I would not know how to write one of those. (See above re me: dyed in the wool deviant.) The hero, Elliot Schafer, is a cranky bookworm bisexual dude who is against noble battles to the death, but pro sexy magical peoples. He has two friends, a beautiful elven maid who loves battles to the death called Serene, and Luke, a gentleman of questionable lineage but great prowess in battle (Elliot’s life is very difficult). 

Whether Elliot will live the dream and score with all the other members of his trusty band (a feat never before accomplished in fantasy literature! The Lord of the Rings band didn’t do it. The Belgariad band didn’t do it. The Narnia band didn’t do it, which is for the best, because such goings on are displeasing to Lion Jesus.)… remains to be seen. But it seems possible that may be in Elliot’s future. You will find out, readers.

However! I have now explained Magisterium, and Turn of the Story, but I have not answered my fair reader’s question, which concerns a makeout that went down between Elliot and a young man by the name of Dale who believed (with some justification) that Elliot was Warm For His Form. I shall quote from this scene.

Elliot is not a restful person to make out with because he comes out with these upsetting statements. 

I believe Dale initiated the kiss, inviting Elliot on an outing (which Dale thought was a tacit yes to Make-Out Point!) and having said invitation accepted, and then being caught up in a fun spontaneous moment–also Elliot’s response is swift enough so it’s almost a mutual decision. But if I have to pick one initiator, Dale. 

I likewise believe Elliot was in a somewhat open frame of mind. You know how it is when one is young and underwater. It’s a complicated situation: he’s lonely when Dale asks and questioning his place in the world and it feels good to do something simple and fun, he always thought Dale was attractive, but never thought of pursuing a relationship with him because a) Elliot’s friend Luke had called dibs on Dale, and that is against bro code! and b) Elliot believes he and Dale have a bit of a personality mismatch so it mightn’t work out. 

So there’s sublimated stuff going on for Elliot, and a lot of crossed wires on both sides: Dale thinks Elliot flirts with him a ton and is now coming to a sexy outdoor location. Elliot thinks he is successfully making friends with his friend’s Future Boyfriend, yet Elliot may also be putting out The Vibe. Mixed signals, young Elliot. This never happened to Frodo Baggins. 

I hope the question has been answered to the satisfaction of all! In conclusion, to return to the most important part of the post… the owl’s name was Charlie. Isn’t she cute? 


this is part two to this

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iquitelikeitthatway  asked:

omg, I love your first-son-stiles-stilinski verse. You should def write more in it. Maybe Stiles gets a stalker, MAYBE THAT STALKER BECOMES VIOLENT, WE JUST DON'T KNOW (pls write more)

(previously on first son stiles stilinski)


Everything starts slowly falling into place after Stiles enrolls at Georgetown University. He hadn’t expected it to; he’d expected going to college would be weird, awkward, possibly even doomed to fail. The whole “being followed by a guy in a suit wherever I go” thing, as well as the “everybody and their grandmother knows all about my tragic backstory” thing, not to mention the “my dad is the current President of the United States” thing— it just didn’t exactly seem like the best way to excel either academically or socially, that’s all.

Keep reading

Lochte is a good friend, one of my best friends in swimming. It’s one of those deals where we are hardly alike, but like a lot of the same stuff. I call him Doggy. No good reason. Doggy is a Florida surfer dude; I grew up near Baltimore. Doggy’s idol is the rapper Lil Wayne, who is also one of my favorite musicians. Doggy sometimes wears gold chains around his neck, baggy pants, a diamond-encrusted grill in his mouth. Cool that it’s Lochte’s style; not mine. I have a bulldog named Herman. Lochte’s dog, a Doberman, is named Carter, after Lil Wayne, whose real name is Dwayne Michael Carter, Jr. In May, Lochte sprained his left ankle when Carter the dog ran out the front door of Lochte’s house in Gainesville; chasing Carter down the street, Lochte said he turned the ankle. At least that was one version of the story. His dad later said it happened after a skateboarding trick gone bad. Who knows? Doggy is a free spirit.

A free spirit who is a hellacious competitor.
—  Michael Phelps, No Limits: The Will to Succeed
  • Ski Lodge Spec Script Scenes 1/2: http://bmwwritinggmw.tumblr.com/post/146443779744/ski-lodge-head-script-reblog-if-you-like-it
  • Ski Lodge Spec Script Scene 3:
  • http: //bmwwritinggmw.tumblr.com/post/146828068669/ski-lodge-head-script-pt-2-reblog-if-you-like
  • Ski Lodge Spec Scene 4: http://bmwwritinggmw.tumblr.com/post/147783629219/new-edited-ski-lodge-spec-script-part-4-reblog
  • Ski Lodge Spec Scene 5:
  • http: //bmwwritinggmw.tumblr.com/post/147837013969/ski-lodge-spec-script-scenes-1-5-in-case-you
  • Ski Lodge Part 6 (Conclusion):
  • : Bus ride home, most kids on the bus already. Josh and Topanga at the front in their seats. Camera angle from back of bus, watching kids get on :
  • : Smackle gets on first quickly, goes to a seat in the back, crosses arms look’s out window:
  • : Maya next, passes by Josh in the first seat, they lightly smirk at one another, Josh breaks gaze by looking down, Maya keeps walking, pleased with herself, sits middle of bus by window:
  • : Lucas next, steamrolls right past Maya:
  • Maya:
  • Oh hey Huckleberry, where ya be-
  • : Lucas keeps going and sits down, leaving Maya looking confused:
  • Riley next on bus, stops, looks at Lucas then looks at Maya, then Lucas, than Maya, Lucas than Maya:
  • : Maya, raises eyebrows and mouths:
  • Come sit down now???
  • : Riley gives one last glance at Lucas and then sits with Maya, looking somber, Maya looking at her slightly concerned:
  • : Farkle comes on, Riley watches him walk by as he goes down and sits with Smackle in the back, not even glancing her way:
  • : Riley sinks her head down, disappointed:
  • : Maya Still looking concerned:
  • : Zay and Cory on the bus last, stop and look at everyone who is totally silent, no one looking at each other:
  • Cory:
  • Uhm, Mr Babineaux?
  • Zay:
  • Yes, Mr. Matthews?
  • Cory:
  • : Pointing to all the kids:
  • What’s going on here, what is this?
  • Zay:
  • Don’t know that yet, sir.
  • Cory:
  • Ya gonna find out?
  • Zay:
  • Plan on it, sir.
  • Cory:
  • It gonna be a huge disaster?
  • Zay:
  • Looks like it, sir.
  • Cory:
  • : Looking disgusted:
  • Nature.
  • : Zay sits down next to Lucas:
  • Cory:
  • : Peppy:
  • Okay well how about a little bus ride entertainment everyone, eh? A little sing along maybe? 99 bottles of cola anyone?
  • Josh:
  • 99 bottles of...cola?
  • Cory:
  • We’re only approved for general audiences
  • : Shrugs:
  • Josh:
  • Ah, okay
  • Cory:
  • So, 99 bottles? She’ll be Comin Round the Mountain?
  • : No one even looks at him:
  • Josh? Ya wanna help me out a little here?
  • Josh:
  • Sorry my brother, you’re on your own with this one.
  • : Puts on headphones:
  • Come on everybody! What’s a road trip without some singin!
  • : Silence, no one looking:
  • How about a little eye spy? License plate game? Truth or dare?
  • Everyone:
  • NO!!!!!
  • : Cory taken aback, looking hurt by everyone yelling at him:
  • Topanga:
  • Okay, Captain Cory, why don’t you just sit down and take a nap.
  • : Cory doesn’t move:
  • Topanga:
  • That’ssss it, alright, come on and just sit down with me.
  • : Cory sits with her, sinking down slowly:
  • Topanga:
  • : Whispers:
  • Let the kids live, remember?
  • Cory:
  • : Humorously frustrated:
  • A bunch of maroons, all of ‘em!
  • Topanga:
  • : Patting Cory on the shoulder:
  • I know Honey, life’s tough. I know. Maybe you should think about getting a helmet.
  • : Cory gives her a dirty look than lays his head on shoulder of Topanga, falls asleep almost instantly and snores his girly snore:
  • : Topanga chuckles to herself:
  • : Flash over to Maya/Riley:
  • Maya:
  • You alright, Honey?
  • Riley:
  • : Fake Riley smile, almost tears in her eyes:
  • Yeah Maya, I’m fine.
  • Maya:
  • : Steadfast in Riley’s eyes:
  • It’s going to be okay. I am here for you. I am ALWAYS here for you. Whenever you're ready to talk about it.
  • Riley:
  • : More tears in her eyes, sits facing forward, matter of factly:
  • Except there’s nothing to talk about.
  • Maya:
  • Like I said, whenever you're ready.
  • : Looks out window:
  • : Pan to Zay/Lucas:
  • Zay:
  • You alright man?
  • Lucas:
  • : Extremely sarcastic/rude:
  • Oh me? Me, am I alright? Yeah, Zay, I’m great. I’m totally fine. I’ve literally never been better.
  • Zay:
  • Dude that couldn’t have been easy to see Ma-
  • Lucas:
  • Not now Zay, OK? Just…Not. Now.
  • : Zay nods, glances over at Maya, then back at Lucas shaking his head slightly, Lucas just looking out the window, angrily:
  • : Pan back to Farkle and Smackle :
  • Farkle:
  • : Jiggles leg nervously, looks over at Smackle, who glances back, both nervously awkwardly smirk at each other and look back down, riding in silence :
  • : Long pause:
  • : Farkle breaks silence:
  • Smackle…Can I ask you something?
  • Smackle:
  • Alright.
  • Farkle:
  • …Why do you flirt with Lucas so much?
  • Smackle:
  • : Glances over hastily:
  • What? Are you trying to accuse me of something? Because after last night-
  • Farkle:
  • No, no of course not, I’m not accusing you of anything. And I’m so sorry if last night made you uncomfortable, but there was no reason to be. I just really want to know...Why do you flirt with Lucas?
  • Smackle:
  • I ….I guess I’m not totally sure I know that answer.
  • Farkle:
  • : Pauses briefly :
  • Well. I think I do.
  • Smackle:
  • You think I like Lucas?
  • Farkle:
  • No, I don’t think you like Lucas.
  • Smackle:
  • Then what? What is it that you think?
  • Farkle:
  • : Takes a deep breath, then looks at her and begins:
  • I think you are Isadora Smackle. One of the most beautiful, intelligent, wonderful people in the world. And I think that you never used to know that…how beautiful you are. But I also think that has changed. I think you are starting to understand it, and I think you are learning how to be confident. Not just with me, but with everyone around you. And so you flirt with people like Lucas and Zay because you’ve never been brave enough to do it before.
  • Smackle:
  • I never mean to upset you, Farkle-
  • Farkle:
  • : Very matter of fact, looking at the ground:
  • I know that. But Smackle that’s the thing. I’m not upset that you flirt with them, or anyone. Maybe I should be, but I’m not. I’m actually glad.
  • : Smackle looks taken aback/confused:
  • : Farkle looks straight into her eyes:
  • I care so much about you that there is literally nothing i want more than to see you happy and loving yourself. That’s all that matters to me...Do you understand?
  • Smackle:
  • I think so.
  • Farkle:
  • I like you. Sometimes I think one day I could more than like you. You are the first girl I have ever felt that way about. But you’re changing. We all are. And I don't know exactly how to handle that, but sometimes I think that maybe you and I are better as teammates, then we are at being boyfriend and girlfriend. I just know that I always want to cheer you on, Smackle. I never want to be what holds you back.
  • Smackle:
  • But you aren’t holding me back. You make me want to be better.
  • Farkle:
  • Yea! Yea in math and science and school! You do that for me too. But do you ever think you would be happier having the freedom for new social experiments, without worrying about what I think? Because I think you deserve that, Isadora. I think deep down you want that. And I know you don’t want to hurt me, but you won’t, OK? You can tell me anything and I promise you won't hurt me.
  • Smackle:
  • : Ponders, pauses:
  • Maybe a part of me wants that. Yes. But I care about you, too. And you are right, I do not want to hurt you.
  • : Grabs his hand:
  • You have helped me feel, Farkle Minkus.
  • Farkle:
  • And you have helped me understand love, Isadora Smackle.
  • : Smiling at each other:
  • Farkle:
  • And I’m really sorry about last night. I don’t want to hurt you either. Even though I’m still not quite sure why you were.
  • Smackle:
  • I don’t think I was hurt. I think I was confused. Perhaps in denial. But I’m not anymore.
  • Farkle:
  • : Perplexed:
  • Denial? About you and me?
  • Smackle:
  • No, not you and…me.
  • Farkle:
  • Then what?
  • Smackle:
  • You’ll see.
  • Farkle:
  • : Still perplexed, then looks down, silence:
  • Smackle:
  • So…
  • Farkle:
  • So…
  • Smackle:
  • Did we just…
  • : Using air quotes:
  • Have a “break up”?
  • Farkle:
  • Yes, I think maybe we did.
  • Smackle:
  • Hmm. I have never experienced the end of a romantic relationship before. Do I cry now?
  • Farkle:
  • : Chuckles:
  • I haven’t either. But no Smackle, not if you don’t feel sad.
  • Smackle:
  • Should I feel sad?
  • Farkle:
  • It’s okay if you don’t.
  • Smackle:
  • Maybe a little sad. But mostly I feel…content. Is that an acceptable way to feel?
  • Farkle:
  • : Smiles to himself:
  • Yea, that’s totally acceptable. I think I feel that way as well.
  • : Flash forward to everyone exiting bus, Topanga Cory and Josh standing out on the curb as everyone gets off:
  • : Riley comes out first:
  • Riley:
  • Thanks for taking us skiing, you guys.
  • : Maya comes up behind her Riley:
  • Maya:
  • First of all Riley, you didn't even ski. You realized there were no bunnies on the bunny slope and stayed inside drinking cocoa all day.
  • Riley:
  • They had the mini marshmellows!
  • Maya:
  • I know honey.
  • But yeah, thanks Matthews. It was…interesting.
  • : Josh and Maya smiling coyly at each other:
  • Cory:
  • : Looking back and forth at the two of them, growing concerned:
  • Wait a minute, what’s going on here? what IS this??? What happened this weekend?!
  • Josh:
  • : Quickly, shaking head vigorously:
  • Nothin!
  • Maya:
  • Nothing!
  • : Maya slowly, slyly smiles at Josh again:
  • …Nothing yet, at least.
  • : Winks at Josh, Josh smiles back, sees Cory staring at him angrily, quickly puts on a straight face, Cory looking like he is going to explode:
  • Maya:
  • OK Riles time to go!
  • : Maya quickly pulls Riley by the hand and runs away, Riley stumbling being dragged by her:
  • Cory:
  • : Chasing after them:
  • Maya...Maya! Shawn is NOT GOING TO LIKE THIS!
  • : Zay next to exit, Lucas after:
  • Josh:
  • : Reaches for a pound:
  • See ya later guys, hope you had a fun-
  • Lucas:
  • : Pauses to look at Josh annoyed:
  • ....Oh yeah whatever
  • : Stalks off quickly mumbling:
  • ....creepy creep creep...
  • Josh:
  • : Looks perplexed at Zay:
  • What’s up with that guy?
  • Zay:
  • He uh, yeah he gets that motion sickness thing, ya know. Makes him crabby so…
  • : Salutes Josh:
  • See ya!
  • : Runs off after Lucas:
  • : Farkle and Smackle exit last, wave goodbye to Topanga and Josh, start walking, together:
  • Farkle:
  • : Stops:
  • So…
  • : Reaches hand out to for Smackle to shake:
  • Teammates, then?
  • Smackle:
  • : Looks at hand, then Farkle, grabs him into a hug:
  • Yes. Teammates. And friends.
  • : Pull away from hug:
  • Smackle:
  • : Points finger in Farkle’s face:
  • But just because I have just shattered your Farkle heart to pieces, I mean look at you, you’re a mess-
  • : Gestures up and down at Farkle:
  • : Farkle, surprised looks down at himself, wondering how he is acting/looking like a mess:
  • If you think I am going to go easy on you in debate team, calculus club, or any other activity we may have to compete in- you’ve got another thing coming, buster. You’re just going to have to toughen up.
  • Farkle:
  • Oh, I’ll mend this broken heart, Isadora. And then? I’m gonna bring it.
  • : Silly joking sneer at her:
  • Game on, Nemesis.
  • Smackle:
  • : Sneering back:
  • Game on.
  • : Two start walking away from each other, Smackle turns back around:
  • Smackle:
  • Oh. And Farkle?
  • Farkle:
  • Yea?
  • Smackle:
  • I wasn’t the first girl.
  • Farkle:
  • ????
  • Smackle:
  • The first girl you liked. I was not the first.
  • Farkle:
  • : Getting upset/defensive, starts to walk back towards her:
  • Smackle, what? Yes you we-
  • Smackle:
  • : Puts her hand up to stop him:
  • I told you I was no longer confused after last night. And I am not. I now understand everything. Soon, you will understand also. You are almost as smart as me, after all.
  • : Pats him on the cheek:
  • Farkle:
  • Smackle, what!?
  • Smackle:
  • Like I said…You’ll see.
  • : Smackle walks away, Farkle left standing there, confused:
  • Fandom: I am looking for feed back so please share it with me.

practicingproductivity  asked:

Hi, Sami. I'm a new follower and your blog has been very eye-opening to me, who is thinking of applying for JET either next year or the year after. I have two weird questions. As a woman also from the US and a feminist, is there anything especially different I should be prepared for so I don't start flipping tables? Is your husband also a JET? I want to do JET and my serious SO wants to join me, but he's not sure he wants to do JET as well. I worry it might be hard for him to find a job.

Hey @practicingproductivity, thanks for the follow and the compliments <3 You have some good questions here, let me try to do the best I can. I tend to ramble, put up with me if you please~


 I’ve become super vocal over the years, in regards to my beliefs, and feminism is one I defs feel strongest about. I have some slight advice, but I think you gotta just experience it. HOWEVER I will try. Culturally, Japan is not America (insert big ole duh from everyone here) but this doesn’t mean that you should come over saying that feminism is not a thing here. I literally had an ALT come into Japan, and within a week she posted a “free the nipple campaign” video and, I verbatim quote, said, “I’m so glad I come from America, where women have a voice. Did you know that feminism doesn’t exist in Japan?”

Needless to say, me, my husband, and several other female friends of hers went off. I found some documents from the Meiji era to shut her up, as well as some more modern examples. But that is neither here nor there sweet thing.

Now there are two reasons why she said this. 1) she was new and culturally the feminism that she was expecting (like the free the nipple campaign) wasn’t directly in her line of sight in our rural city—- and 2) she’s a bit of a self-centered egotist who kind of lost touch with reality a while ago. But that’s less related than the first part.

The point of that is: there are some things that will make you want to go “Wow, do rights for women even exist here?” but take it with a grain of salt, because the same could be said for any country struggling to get women’s voices heard just as equally as mens’. Just in different ways.

However, you wanted me to let you know what to look out for, and Ima do it!!!


These are just things that pissed me off. Women in Japan, feel free to reblog, but let’s try to be proactive about it!
- sexual harrassment and how it’s dealt with is the biggest thing that bothers me here. Gonna add some subsets of ideas for a second:
     a) fuckin kabe-dons. I don’t like the idea of men cornering women with kabe-dons, which is the tamest and probs most accepted and squealed after bullshit thing I’ve found so far. Have you ever seen the movie Grandma’s Boy? It’s kind of dumb, bit of a stoner film, but like… I really love it? There are a lot of positive messages about the “mlady” type of asshole going after a girl, men thinking she’s a fake gamer, etc etc. But I digress. In one part, creepy dude traps Girl with a kabe-don. And her face is PERFECT. This is not sexy, it is being trapped.
   b) public gropers, and how very often the police here react with “What were you wearing at the time?”
     c) stalkers. There is a huge culture in Japan of seeing a foreigner and this subgroup of super special snowflakes (do they get together once a month to decide how to harass gaijin?) think “Hey free English lesson!” and follow us in public. Sometimes it’s harmless. But sometimes it’s harmful and scary, and there is literally no way to tell the difference between the two until you’re past your comfort zone. I dislike the way this is dealt with too, in Japan. But I dislike how it’s dealt with in most cases anyway >.>
    d) “jokes”. I’m sure if you peruse through my blog you’ll see the progression of Rude Sensei’s saga, where he touched my food and would go ‘Mmm say yummy’ or when he would gesture about my body or when he went so far as to joke about me and him having an affair when we had unrelated business trips within the same week. Basically, shitty people exist EVERYWHERE. Be aware of this in coming to Japan, because no it is not normal, and no it is not okay, and no you do not have to put up with it!

- women’s roles in relationships. I cannot tell you how often I’ve gotten laughed at when I say that my husband cleans and cooks and I do not. I really don’t. But they don’t believe me. Culturally, that’s absurd.
      My husband worked all through my time at university, sometimes upwards of 90hr work weeks. He pushed himself so hard, and when he came home, I would clean and do the dishes and the laundry etc. It was the least I could do. Now, the roles are switched. I work more than he does, and I want him to have free time to spend how he wants. I don’t want him to go back to 90hr work weeks. But my teachers are just amazed that he does these things for me.
      Basically, in Japan, women either work until they have kids, or they don’t end up marrying (this is a big generalization, but one that isn’t exactly unfounded). Basically, I get  GOT asked all the time, “Does your husband mind if you go to the enkai? Oh no, who will cook his dinner?” and I would just shut that shit down whenever I could. My husband does not and has not gotten these questions in the sheer volume that I have. It’s ridiculous.
    Google: “japanese women in the workplace” if you want to peruse articles about women’s experiences in Japan. I’m not Japanese, I can’t attest to it, but I have had several coworkers who’ve said to me “As soon as I have a baby, I’m going to stop working. That’s just how it is.” And that burns my grits, that men can talk about their kids at work no problem but if a woman does, they’re seen as an “absent mother”– unless they forfeit their job and stay home. Again. Not a problem limited to Japan, but one that is prevalent here.

- black bag of shame. Tampons, pads, condaaaaams, anything to do with your downstairs goes in a black bag of shame then in your regular grocery bag. I hate it because it associates something we as women have no control over (our periods) with something we do have control over (sex, and by extension contraception). I am not embarrassed by having to buy toilet paper, and I will not be cowed into being embarrassed about the blood I just happen to have every month. Everybody poops, and a lot of girls have their periods. I am more ashamed of the fuckton of bread that I buy after a 5k run.
       Hubs about made a cashier faint when he bought tampons for me once and said “iranai” to the black bag. He carried them out in his hands. SCANDALOUS. He’s a sweetheart.

These are just a few of the things to prep for, but I want you to try to prep for conversation versus confrontation. Sure, confrontation IS necessary. Better believe I told Rude Sensei, “No. Not funny.” when he ‘joked’ like a dickweed. But other times, like when I was talking with other women in the workplace, it was not my job to confront the system. It was my responsibility as their friend and coworker to talk with them civilly, respectfully, and share my own culture as an exchange (job descrip thrown in there, yeayuh). So come over not expecting these things to happen, but being open to talk with other ladies if and when they do! <3


Hubs is not a JET, he’s just a Hubs which is the most important thing in the world to me but also still not a JET. He works now part time at a nursery school, reading books and playing with Lego’s and going to the local grocery store with a parade of baby ducklings in his wake. It is SO cute. We don’t want kids, but damn if my heart don’t melt when I see pics of him “getting his nails painted” by the little two year olds in his class. Sweet babies. Here’s a pic of his class making some crafty “alligator" bracelets that they were gonna use to eat some “monkey” finger puppets for a song about counting.

He came over because we were married, so he had a dependent visa to get into Japan. My work sponsored me, and then I sponsored him. Jobs kind of fell in his lap in our small town, but he disliked all of them that related to teaching. At nursery school and preschool, he gets to just play with the kids and speak more Japanese than English, so it suits his style more. I wish I could tell you more about the ease of getting a job, but really we just go to a TON of stuff in our city and have a ton of friends in the area. Never underestimate word of mouth. It’s gotten Hubs every job he’s had in Aomori.

He has a dependent visa with a stamp to work part-time now. If he got a full job, he could switch to a different working visa. There are other ways to stay in Japan for longer. There is a cultural studies visa (not sure how you get it, but worth looking into) that a couple of JET SOs actually have in Aomori! We have a JET in Shichinohe whose girlfriend is on a visa to study ikebana for a year (flower arranging), and we have another JET in Hashikami who is bringing her boyfriend over on a similar visa (with a different area of study I think). So if you’re not ready to get married, and they’re not into teaching/JET, there ARE ways to have them stay with you!!

I hope this helped. I ramble so much. I just want you to have a good view of things without feeling like it’s some scary place where perverts are going to grab you every day on the train. I honestly feel safer walking at night in Japan alone than I ever did anywhere in the United States. I feel better on public transportation than I ever did in the US too. Flip side to gaijin getting picked on that Japanese people can’t always account for: I will go fucking CRAZY and embarrass the shit out of you if you lay hands on me or get in my bubble. And that usually puts an end to it. That whole “don’t disturb others/crowd culture” in Japan can be used to your advantage, whereas in the States I have seen too many videos of women being harassed in public and the person’s reaction is to whip out a phone instead of help her.

So there are cultural differences to be aware of here.

Point that we make at every AomOrientation: it is not legal for you, in most cases, to hurt your attacker in any way. Therefore things like mace are considered a weapon and “not okay”. It is a bullshit law, and so break it if you must, but if you are harassed or assaulted and can break away by screaming or crying or calling the police or running— do that FIRST.

I feel like I’m getting distracted, but also like all of this is necessary. Feel free to reblog as always, tumblr fam, and correct or add or just get the word out.

Wonderful questions, and I wish you the best of luck in your decisions regardin’ JET!

brogitsune  asked:

talk to me about minewt

this took a while, but i really do fucking want to talk about minewt, especially minewt and the death cure.
and i have the book beside me so let’s dive into that pain.

beware of spoiler friends, you know the drill
also be aware that i might just over analyze everything.

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