i don't know where this came from but look at her

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
on the new Iron Fist series

So after binge watching a ton of Marvel’s new Iron Fist series, I went onto tumblr, wondering what the fandom was up to now, what with all these new gifs and stuff to make. ‘Maybe I would find some fan art or something’ I thought innocently to myself,

BUT BOY WAS I WRONG

instead, I was greeted with SO MUCH DISCOURSE on how Iron Fist ‘needs a chinese-american actor’ or ‘has terrible dialogue and is slow’.

the best part is when I found out that some of y’all are trying to get this show boycotted like ‘????’

Now as a Chinese-speaking Asian female, living in Asia, with an Asian background and a good know-how of Chinese history, as well as a decent knowledge of comic books, (although I confess I got into the animated series first) I’m here to end the discussion before y’all get your full rage on and start fighting fans of the show like it’s Lord of the Flies up in here

So keep reading if you want to be educated or if you just want to fight me before you know what you’re even talking about

“THE SHOW INSULTS CHINESE CULTURE”

Uhhhh…no? I’ve seen a few episodes and I mean so far there isn’t really anything that screams ‘insult’ or even offensive in the slightest. Besides maybe the fact that they take the beliefs and twist them a little bit but honestly even that ain’t that bad as to what I’ve seen elsewhere.

I’ve read the boycott post and let me say that yea, they dressed him with an eye for Asian elements, but maybe that’s because it’s supposed to be resembling Asian clothing? I mean how is that offensive? Is it the part that it looks Asian? Or that you simply feel that white people that direct these shows should not be using Asian stuff for entertainment? Because I hate to break it to you but it’s still not offensive. Even the dragon tattoo is totally fine because it’s supposed to resemble Asian elements yea but also have y’all read the comics? Because he punched through a dragon and basically took it’s heart. So I mean a dragon tattoo kinda matches the theme.

I mean in the first episode they speak almost flawless Chinese for Pete’s sake! Hell, I was surprised that they even had it in them to have a non-Google translated line. Sure the accent was a little overdoing it cuz not even I have that thick a Chinese accent but I’ll excuse it since he was apparently learning and speaking 15 years. (I speak it maybe a few times a day for like the last 14 years or so only)

So no, the show doesn’t really insult Chinese culture, sure they might be ignorant, but you must understand that after generations of stereotypes and misconceptions that that can’t just go away with one show

“Danny Rand should be played by an Asian guy/be a Chinese-American”

I can’t even begin to tell you my frustration about this.

Y’all do know this show is based on the comics right?

You know, the one with the white guy.

I know Marvel is infamous for not including enough representation in their shows but seriously? This is like the Harry Potter thing all over again with Hermione being black, it’s not that we don’t want representation or anything, but it’s the fact that this hero that us comic fans have come to already love has been replaced. Or at least it feels like it. Like when a movie is made from a book and people go crazy because character XYZ suddenly has different traits or isn’t quite what was described as compared to the book.

Frankly, it sucks.

So even though yes, Marvel should have more Asians in their shows, don’t expect them to completely give the main character a makeover, even if the makeover was supposed to provide representation. And honestly? I don’t want them to change him because I really freaking love Iron Fist, just as he is.

“This show just villainizes Asians”

So you tell me that my race is being made villains because Marvel decided that most of their Asians on their shows are evil ninjas (aka the Hand) and at most there are like 3 sorta good Asians. Oh and I’m sorry, you want more Asian men that are good guys? You want a balance of Asian heroes?

Well I guess that would be kind of hard to fit into the story since, oh, I don’t know, everything happens in the USA?

If you want more Asian characters well then look no further because you do have them. Daisy Johnson from Agents of Shield? What about her extremely brave mom? Or maybe Colleen in Iron Fist? Everyone seems to be blatantly ignoring her badassery and only seeing the part where she’s a sorta love interest.

Facts are, there are Asian characters, you’re really just looking hard enough. I agree wholeheartedly when you say that more Asian men need to be in the Marvel universe that aren’t part of the bad guy team but you gotta say that they are still awesome.

Does anyone even remember the Japanese ninja yakuza guy from Daredevil? Dude got set on fire and STILL came back to kick ass. That’s a plus in my book because even though he’s considered bad, he’s been proven to be cunning, smart, and overall awesome.

“The show has terrible stunts/acting/dialogue/fight scenes”

From here on out it’s mostly just me trying to explain why the directors and writers of the show made decisions in the show to make it what it is, so let’s dive right into it.

  • STUNTS

Actually the stunts weren’t half-bad. If you’ve seen other shows or movies that are heavily reliant on stunts and action, and compare it to this show, they really aren’t that much different. Sure it might seem a little unbelievable sometimes like they’re breaking physics or something, but he already has a glowing fist. I think we’ve crossed the line of believable long ago.

  • ACTING

I have nothing to say about this except that go and take some acting or drama classes before coming and criticizing these awesome men and women who did indeed try their best

  • DIALOGUE

Now I get the dialogue might be a little weird at times and what not, but you must understand that this show was partially written with the Defenders series in mind. So almost everything that was said in the show is meant to lead to something more. Thus, you must take it as a bigger picture. Sorta like how everyone said that Fantastic Beast and Where to Find Them wasn’t as good as they thought it would be, that movie was also meant to lead on to a bigger story so you might want to excuse the weird speech and cryptic lines at times.

  • FIGHT SCENES & ACTION

Okay seriously people, please read the comics. Danny Rand is supposed to be an accidental hero, one that doesn’t want to fight unless he really has zero choice in the matter. So yea, the fight scenes won’t be that interesting, but only because the character in question is more interested in ending the fight than anything.

~

So there you have it, my whole slightly angry info-dump on Iron Fist and Marvel’s representation problem in general. If you want to correct me or scold me even then by all means message me or shoot me an ask. But just keep in mind that Marvel can’t make all your problems go away in one show, and please for the love of all that is good read the comics before coming to rant okay?

You know how sometimes we make meme and social media references in real life?

The aliens certainly didn’t.

The captain had no idea what to expect from his decision to bring a second human aboard the ship. His only guidance in the matter had been the rather unhelpful suggestion to acquire one already pack-bonded with Human-Megan. Unfortunately, given human nature, this could apply to any number of humans, and attempting to ask Human-Megan herself for an organized list of them all proved useless. (He had been immediately accused of being a “stalker”.)

However, he did eventually become aware of a certain human who had been a “sister from another mister” for most of Human-Megan’s life. Upon inquiring about this new human, he was met with enthusiastic approval, mostly in the form of the repeated, painfully high-pitched word “yes”.

And so Human-Lynn was brought aboard.

At first, the crew were presented with nothing they were unfamiliar with. There had been a temporary scare upon first viewing Human-Lynn, due to the vibrant and multicolored crop of hair she bore. However, Human-Lynn had quickly ended their confusion by explaining the concept of hair dye, which, although it had left a few crewmembers nauseous, was understandable for human standards.

In addition, Human-Lynn was considerably less emotional, or so it seemed. Upon encountering disagreements with the crew, she would begin laying down insults in an almost offhand manner, and nothing seemed to cause her to be visibly furious. However, Human-Megan had assured them that she was simply “sassy” and “sarcastic” in nature, and that when she began to insult them in such a calm manner, she was indeed furious (although it was difficult to imagine that a being could be simultaneously calm and furious).

But then came the strange, and often illogical, conversations that often ensued between Human-Lynn and Human-Megan.

For instance, there was their first passage through a nebula since Human-Lynn’s arrival. Human-Megan, although she had borne witness to nebulae before, looked on in wonder almost identical to Human-Lynn’s. Both were seemingly rendered immobile, mouths slightly agape.

“Gorgeous.”

“Yeah,” Human-Megan affirmed.

“What’s the…how does this even…” After a moment of failed articulation, Human-Lynn let out a deep sigh. “Science side of Tumblr?”

“Space dust do the glow-glow,” Human-Megan responded almost seamlessly.

“Thank you, science side of Tumblr.”

Several more occurrences of seemingly cryptic conversations where yet to come. Occasionally, the two would make eye contact and mutter “same” for seemingly no reason at all, and once during the first meal rotation Human-Lynn had stood and bellowed, “AND HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA!” much to the surprise and momentary panic of her fellow crewmembers.

At last, a member of the cultural research department approached the two during their third meal rotation and inquired about the nature of their seemingly meaningless conversations. It was his duty, after all, to collect data regarding new species, especially in regards to behavior.

He was met with general laughter, a sound still rather jarring to hear without appropriate warning.

“Holy…crap,” Human-Lynn breathed, wiping a tear from her eye as she shook with laughter. “An alien…wants to know…about memes. I never thought I’d see the day.”

“Memes…?”

“Yeah,” Human-Megan affirmed. “They’re like…I don’t know…references to popular culture on Earth? They’re usually pretty stupid, and either considered hilarious or grounds to murder someone because they’re that stupid.”

“Grounds to…murder someone?!”

“Not literally, dude. We’ve discussed this. Not literally.”

“There’s a lot of memes,” Human-Lynn continued in her friend’s place. “Spongebob is a few…oh, there’s the dog in the burning house. You know, the ‘this is fine’ meme?”

“Yeah, and Moon-Moon, and 'you shall not pass’–”

“John Cena–”

“Screw you, I hate John Cena–”

“These are not the droids you’re looking for, that one’s a classic–”

“And then there’s some that aren’t really memes, they’re more like Tumblr legends. Like the science side of Tumblr, and John Green, and Superwholock. But Lynn and I like to use those in real life because we’re weird.”

The researcher nodded, a gesture he had it adopted from the humans he studied, although the concepts they were referring to were far beyond his understanding. Perhaps this was one of those cases where you had to simply let humans be humans, regardless of how strange it was.

“I believe I have heard of these…memes,” he mused after a moment. “So…what is Rickrolling?”

Immediately the grins dropped from the humans’ faces.

“We don’t talk about Rickrolling,” hissed Human-Megan. “We never–EVER–discuss–Rickrolling.”

“Understood.”

Okay, but I can’t stop thinking about Eddie and Richie in university. 

So it’s a few years later after Pennywise and the Loser Club have carried on with their lives, real life doesn’t stop for anyone ya know, paranormal clown killers or not. And for real-life reasons, everyone goes to different universities in and out of the state. 

For this reason, of course, Eddie makes new friends, who are a little surprised at first when he reveals he’s taken as he’s flirted with at a party one night. It becomes a game among these friends to imagine what this guy significant other would be like. Obviously, she would be some girl with straight A’s and neatly parted hair who wears summer dresses and probably wears glasses - the stereotypical image of a good Christian girl. 

One afternoon Eddie had mentioned his ‘significant other’ was coming to visit and they all took this as the opportunity to finally see this put-together, pure, Puritan girl. 

So you can imagine their shock when a boy, with straggly black hair to his jaw, covered in freckles and moles, wearing a faded (only slightly stained) Nirvana shirt and ripped jeans clambers out of an old pickup truck with a shout of, “EDS MOTHERFUCKING KASPBRAK, HAVE I MISSED YOU!” 

Maybe this boy was just his friend? Maybe he was just dropping her off as well? Would Eddie Kaspbrak, the boy who starts his essay’s the night he gets them, goes to every morning lecture and who is never seen without brushed hair, trouser pleats and a pressed shirt be with the guy with the massive smudged glasses and broken converse?

But then Eddie doesn’t answer him, just kisses him so hard the boy is slammed back into the door of the truck, and his friends give up. 


Alternatively, at his university, Richie’s friends think similarly to Eddie’s. I mean. Richie Tozier, the boy who burnt down the dorm kitchen trying to make goddam pasta, got thrown out of Target for climbing on the checkout counter to dance to the Macarena, and has never been seen wearing a clean shirt in his life - would he be really interested in some preppy clean-cut girl?

Nah, his friends guessed she would be a punk girl with dyed red, no GREEN, hair and wore fishnets and had loads of piercings and got expelled from loads of schools. Yeah, that’s who Richie Tozier would like. 

Oh, how naive and wrong they were. 

Because one day Richie took a shower longer than 5 minutes, ran a brush through his hair, and was even spotted walking into a laundromat. So either he’d finally snapped, or his significant other was visiting. 

They came with him to the park where they expected to find the cyber-punk girl sat under a tree to escape the sun that would tan her perfect porcelain skin or that could melt the random plastic shit she had attached to her crazy clothes and in her hair. 

But then they see Richie walking towards a park bench next to a lake and they are gobsmacked. Sat there was the most conforming, suburban-looking boy they’d ever seen, wearing a dress shirt tucked into pleated trousers with a belt that matched his smart shoes which were the same shade of brown as his round eyes and impeccable hair, throwing handfuls of bread into the pond like a young elderly man. 

They watch how as soon as he approaches the boy stands up with a glare before starting to fix his collar from the nice polo shirt under his freshly clean Star Wars shirt and running his fingers gently through his hair he had attempted to tame, clicking his tongue beratingly and saying something they couldn’t hear. 

Maybe he was another friend trying to make him look good for the girlfriend on her way? 

Then Richie grabs the hand in his hair further into the thick mess and tugs him closer to kiss him deeply, wrapping his lanky arms around the doll-like shorter boy. It’s when the boy stretches onto his toes and flings his arm around Richie’s neck to hold him tighter against him that his friend’s stop trying to pretend they can predict who Richie Tozier is. 

Drunk/Tired Lance College Headcanons

He’s pretty much that Drunk Girl™ post personified.

  • Found Allura crying because she missed her dad and home so he brought her a sweater and a kitten and threatened to beat up whoever made her cry.
  • Interrupted a conversation some girls were having and apologized profusely about it but he just had to say how bomb her highlight looked
  • Was worried Hunk wasn’t eating well due to exams and finals so at 3 am he cooked him a three course meal and made his favorite homemade snack just like Hunk’s mom used to make them (Hunk is pretty much wtf since Lance only seems to know how to make simple stuff and even burned water once)
  • Shiro found him swaddled and buried in blankets or pillows while he was tired but still trying to stay awake and tried to give him that Disappointed Dad Look™ but he just glared at him saying “I’ve seen better disappointed looks from my dog, try again.”
  • Lance usually overthinks things but oddly enough if he’s drunk or tired enough everything is super simple?
    • Pidge: What the hell is wrong with this code???? I’ve re-calibrated it like six times and it still won’t verify anything?!?!!?
    • Lance looking over at it upside down from where he’s laying on the couch all awkward like and what should be physically impossible: Move that 6 and letter A on line 4 to line 5 and move that dash to the right about 3 spaces.
    • Pidge:
    • Pidge:
    • Pidge: What the fuck 
  • There was one time a professor tried to call Lance out…one time
    • Professor: Lance since you’re so obviously engaged in this discussion and no one else can seem to find the answer can you explain this theory for us?
    • Lance having stayed up till 4am when it’s now 7 o’clock: I could if this was even the chapter you had assigned to us to look at and said we would be discussing today, but I mean you’re either going to say well done and try to make it seem like you were testing us when in reality you had no damn idea and was gonna continue teaching like you knew what the fuck you were talking about or you’re going to try to make me look dumb with your pirate looking ass but by all means do what you do.
    • He promptly passed the fuck out right after.
    • The professor stopped calling on him after that.
  • If Lance is tired enough he literally gives no fucks…at all. He’s trying to go home back to sleep, not deal with anyone’s bullshit today.
    • Lance holding Keith by the collar: Keith no, you can’t fight him today, I’m tired and I want to go home and sleep. why are you trying to fight him anyway.
    • Keith: He was talking shit about my mom
    • Lance rolling his sleeves up: You stay the fuck here I’m kicking his greasy ass myself.
    • They had to get Shiro to pick them both up.
    • Lance and Keith: DRIVE DRIVE DRIVE!!!!!
    • Shiro: What the hell did you two do? And Lance why is your lip busted?
    • Lance: The other guy’s going to need an ambulance okay I’m fine, just drive the fuck away now! I think dude’s girlfriend called the cops.
    • Shiro: What the fucking-
    • Shiro tries to be mad but those two are in the backseat asleep and cuddling so he thinks he can let this slide just once.
    • He doesn’t wake them up when he gets in the driveway so like the shit brother he is he leaves them in the car.
    • He waits until it’s 12 at night before setting off the car alarm.
  • Lance just compliments anyone and everyone when he’s super tired.
    • He’ll say how nice and what a good friend Hunk is.
    • Makes Pidge a flower crown like he does for his nieces and nephews
      • Pidge: Where the fuck did you get the flowers? The campus is literally fake grass and the park is at least 10 miles away. You haven’t even left the dorm what the fuck?
      • Lance: Shhhh hush, now you’re the prettiest girl in town with a flower crown
      • Pidge: What was I before?
      • Lance: Prettiest girl in town duh
    • Does the most badass and elegant braids and styles for Allura’s hair but most of the time he’s not even conscious for it and when she shows up with her hair done up he asks her who she went to and she says him and he just sits there having an epiphany for a solid ten minutes every time looking at his hands like they’ve saved lives.
    • He told Coran he was the best uncle ever and the man has not stopped crying about it. Had the quote printed and framed, it’s hung up on the wall for everyone to see.
    • Shiro was asleep so he just got tape, put strips of it on his prosthetic arm (Don’t write on someone’s arm permanently that’s rude) and used the strips to write out small compliments and doodle nice things like flowers and kittens. Shiro wants to be made about but like…it’s not even permanent and he keeps finding a new doodle every few minutes like a easter egg hunt so it keeps him entertained.
    • Saw Keith was sad one time, went out at 11 at night to an old family friend that lived out near where he was, came back with kittens he newly adopted from family friend and just dumped about 3 kittens on Keith.
      • Keith: Lance what the fuck
      • Lance: Pretty people shouldn’t be sad and you’re like the prettiest so that’s pretty much against the federal law??? And kittens are like happiness personified. Keep them, I can’t take them back.
      • He passed the fuck out right after that too.
      • Keith with kittens in his lap: What the fuck

anonymous asked:

I have a small favor to ask as I am v confused rn but could you post a brief description of the various gravity falls aus cus I know the names but I don't know what they're about so if you could inform me I'd be grateful please and thanks love~

Okay, this might take a bit.

Transcendence AU 

Essentially, when Bill fails the apocalypse and is dying, he makes one last desperate attempt to survive by trying to posses Dipper without his permission. Dipper fights back and by a hair’s chance manages to push the weakened Bill from his mind, killing the demon. Only, Bill has already rooted himself too deeply into Dipper and all of Bill’s power remains in Dipper, turning him into a demon and forcing him out of the physical plain. Because of his human origin, Dipper is the only demon capable of becoming physical without a rift, although it takes a while for him to figure out how. Now, while Bill was stopped from destroying the world, it was at the cost of the Transcendence. Pretty much the entire world becomes as magical as Gravity Falls and even more dangerous. Dipper becomes known as the demon Alcor and Mabel is his partner in cult bashing partner Mizar. There’s a lot of world building (reincarnation, prejudice against non-humans, monsters in everyday life, thousands of years as Alcor, Uncle Dipper, angels, other demons, awesome new characters, etc…) and overall, the blog is its own fandom that is constantly contributed to. TAU is the largest, most organized, and highest quality AU that I have ever seen. It’s huge. And fantastic. 

Here’s a longer summary.   This is its wiki.    Its TVtropes page.

Demonic Guardians AU -

Here’s the main comic behind it. Demons’ can have one human that if they bond with and protect, will make the demon stronger. There’s a catch though. If the human dies, a part of the demon does too. The stronger the bond between demon and human, the more damage will be inflicted on the demon when the human dies. Not all humans have a demon, and not all demons have a human. A bunch of the cast of GF have demonic guardians, each character having a different level of bond. Bill Cipher is Dipper’s guardian. Mabel’s is Dot Matrix (used to be named Tad Strange; might recognize him as the square with the bowler hat). Gideon’s is Kryptos (the star on top his tent). Stanley has Pi Mo (looks kinda like a coin). Pacifica’s is the Lumberjack Ghost. There’s a whole lot of fan made demons too. The creator is really cool. Outside of Demonic Guardians AU, she’s made the Danny Phantom crossover: You Smell Like Death, the Over the Garden Wall crossover: Garden Falls, and her own really good comic: The Boy Who Fell.

Monster Falls -

Dipper finds a magic stream called Fluvius Cantatis, some stuff happens, and everyone in the town gets turned into monsters. Dipper’s a Deertaur, Mabel’s a mermaid, Wendy’s a werewolf, Stanley’s a Gargoyle, Stanford’s a sphinx, Gideon’s a vampire, Robbie’s a zombie, Soos is a clay homonculus/golem, Pacifica’s a gorgon, Bill’s…human like, etc… This AU is mostly fan art and fanfiction. Sometimes the monster that a character is turned into is different, but this list is what they’re most commonly depicted as.

Reverse Falls -

I have no idea where this AU came from??? All the characters in this have swapped rolls and personalities. Gideon Pines is a kid visiting Gravity Falls with his cousin/best friend Pacifica Pines(or Southeast). While there, they meet the psychic twins Mabel and Dipper Gleeful who run the Tent of Telepathy. The twins are much darker and more powerful than Gideon from Gravity Falls. Will Cipher is an easily terrified Demon who just wants the twins to leave him alone. All the other character’s changes depend on the artist/writer. Robbie and Wendy usually swap. 

Relativity Falls -

This is essentially an age/generation swap. Twins Stanley and Stanford go to spend the summer with their Grauntie Mabel. The main switches are Mabel with Stanley, Dipper with Stanford, Wendy with Dan, Gideon with Bud, Pacifica with Preston, Abuelita(Maria) with Soos, etc… Most of the show is the same, with a few twists and the added personality of having a different character in whatever situation.

Anti-Gravity AU -

Though not to be mistaken for Relativity Falls, Anti-Gravity is also an age swap. Wendy and Soos are young kids who find Journal 3. Mabel and Dipper are teenagers who work for Grunkle Stan at the Mystery Shack. Pacifica has Robbie’s role (dating Dipper, to Wendy’s jealousy). Bud Gleeful takes Gideon’s place as Wendy and Soos’s enemy. Robbie is Soos’s bully. Other than that, all characters stay the same.

Reunion Falls -

Dipper and Mabel are separated at birth: Mabel growing up with their parents in California and Dipper being raised by Grunkle Stan. Eventually, Mabel finds out about Dipper and runs off to Gravity Falls to meet him. Without a twin, Mabel, while still bright and cheerful, is less out going while Dipper, growing up with Wendy and Stan as role  models, is more confident. The AU is the twins getting to know each other and bonding.

Only Child AU -

Mabel is stillborn, making Dipper an only child. Because of his parent’s ever growing grief over losing a child, Dipper is often neglected. Dipper has the same personality as cannon, but it’s buried under self-worth issues, survivor’s guilt, need to be loved, and shyness. He’s a sad child who really just needs a hug. He also knits sweaters; he always wears the red one he made (it looks a bit like Ford’s). The AU is Dipper’s stay at Gravity Falls with Stan and eventually reaches to him growing up and gaining a little sister, baby Mabel (who both he and his parent’s adore). The AU is all art right now, but the creator is eventually going to make a fic for it.

Fright Falls -

Mabel gets turned into a vampire. Dipper gets turned into a werewolf. The AU is their adventures as creatures of the supernatural. There’s a lot of cool art for the AU.

Immortal Pines AU -

Immortal Pines is a comic where Bill kills Mabel and Dipper, only to realize that it wasn’t what he wanted. He brings the twins back to life and makes them immortal by infusing them with his power. This means that they only exist in the dreamscape. The AU is them trying to get back to normal before they become too much like Bill.  The artist is cool.

Twin Demons AU -

Mabel and Dipper are the Demons, while Bill ‘Billi’ is the 12 year old human. Billi is an innocent, if lacking common sense, kid who’s come to Gravity Falls to stay with his Grunkle Stan. The twins are demons with big plans that involve Billi, much to his horror.

Blinded AU 

The Society of the Blind Eye doesn’t wipe Dipper’s memories of the supernatural, they wipe all his memory.  The Society takes him in, indoctrinating him into their ways. Bill visits and uses Dipper as a spy. The AU is an amnesic Dipper living with only the Society and Bill as company.

Apocalypse Falls 

Mabel’s decision in Not What He Seems has catastrophic damage on Gravity Falls. The Shack is destroyed and many people undergo….changes: physical, mental, even death. Dipper gains wings while Mabel’s mind spirals into madness. The AU just got rebooted, so the story-line is unknown at the moment.

  Gravity Rises -

Another swap AU, this time between personality and symbols. Mabel is Pine Tree, the intellectual and mystery obsessed twin. Dipper is Shooting Star, the laid back and creative one. Stan and Ford switch. Pacifica takes Gideon’s role as Crescent Moon, the leader of the Order of the Crescent Eye (Bill’s cult). She’s a sociopath and the main antagonist. Gideon takes Pacifica’s role as Lone Wolf, the rich kid turned anti-hero. Terrifying with his magic, even Bill is wary of Gideon. It’s a cool AU that’s very different from the show even though it’s partially a personality swap.

Joseon AU -

An AU where Gravity Falls takes place in the Joseon Kingdom in Korea. Everyone wears traditional clothing of the time period and place of the Joseon Kingdom. The AU is mostly fan art.

Coven AU -

Mabel and Dipper are the apprentices of Grunkle Stan in a wold where magic is common. Bill’s a magic cat.

Gravity Keys  -

In this AU, Gravity Falls is set in Key West, Florida. Mabel has a chicken instead of a pig, but other than that, most things stay the same.

Church AU -

It’s Gravity Falls, but in a church. Bill is a demon. Bill is in the Church. Dipper is just so angry at Bill. Things don’t go well.

Kitten Dipper AU -

Dipper finds a comb that has a cat shaped handle. When he brushes his hair with it, he gets turned into a kitten! The AU is Dipper the cat.

Carnivàle Falls 

It’s the 1930s. Mabel and Dipper go to stay with their Grunkle Stan at his traveling freak show. Gideon is a faith healer. The Dust Bowl is a problem.

Spy AU -

Stan and Ford are spys with Fiddleford building their gadgets. They’re trying to take down the Cipher Organization.

Camp Cipher -

Gravity Falls, but as a summer camp. The teens are counselors while all the kids are campers. Nice art.

Never Human AU 

Stanley Pines was stillborn, replaced with a Fae or Changeling. When in Fae mode, Stan had six glowing green eyes. There’s some angst of Stan learning to deal with the fact that he’s a monster and not actually related to his family. It’s later revealed that Dipper is also Fae, which really freaks him out. Mabel is super accepting, so everything turns out fine. It’s a really great AU with fantastic fics and art.

Ghost Stan AU -

Stan is a level 10 ghost. It’s awesome, and Stanley makes a great ghost. There’s a lot of sad. Stan’s dead. The AU has a whole bunch of fanfiction and fanart.

Joml AU/Grim AU -

Stanley befriends the Grim, omen of death. As soon as Ford finds out what Stan’s done he freaks out because, well, Stanley has the omen of death as his pet. Really cute and funny AU. Got some angst too though. Also, Stan makes his own journal.

Frankenstan AU -

Stanley dies pre-portal opening. Ford, being the idiot that he is, bring Stan back to life Frankenstein style with the help of Fiddleford. This includes digging up Stan’s body. It’s also got a mystery trio vibe going for it. 

some fox hcs bc i’m sick and it’s all i’ve been thinking about:

  • when they have movie nights, allison and matt have a competition to see who can catch more popcorn in their mouths. allison always wins so matt just throws popcorn at her without even letting her catch it
  • they all go team grocery shopping after finding out neil has never had at least 50% of the junk food they all grew up on
  • renee takes up crocheting and makes them all fox print patterned socks. they wear them every movie night(even andrew)
  • nicky gets homesick sometimes and when he does he makes a lot of the traditional dishes his mom would and the foxes eat all of it even though they literally saw nicky chopping raw jalapenos earlier
  • allison and dan are real housewives fanatics and they will kill a man to get to the tv. kevin still has the scars on his arm from where allison nearly clawed his arm off for trying to change the tv
  • the foxes do charity dog washing at a nearby pet shelter and neil literally almost gets smothered by the biggest dog there and that’s when the foxes find out neil is the biggest dog magnet
  • nicky makes the mistake of teaching andrew to bake and he never leaves the kitchen. but the tower always smells like vanilla so that’s a bonus
  • neil cannot cook for shit and i’m standing by this until i die. he tried making cup noodles in the dorm microwave and matt came back to a small fire and a calm neil just watching the fire blaze
  • neil twists his ankle falling down some stairs and matt uses this as an excuse to bridal carry him everywhere
  • “do i even weigh anything to you?”  “no, it’s like holding a couple of grapes.”
  • allison and neil take exactly 5 hours every saturday to go shopping, get facials, gossip. allison has video proof of neil sitting on a lounge chair with his whole face covered in a cucumber face mask, sipping lemon water, and getting his nails done. he looks right into her camera and in the most deadpan voice says “ah yes, the bourgeoisie.” the video ends with allison snickering and dropping her phone 
  • whenever anyone is late to practice they have to go on a run with neil and every time they fall behind is a lap they have to do at the next practice. no one is late again after kevin comes back from a run and passes the fuck out
  • the foxes went to disney world once and lost andrew. they don’t speak of it ever again. 
  • matt when asked by some sexist reporter why he listens to what the girls tell him to do: dan’s my girlfriend, renee could kill me, and allison has enough dirt on me to ruin my life until i die. also i respect them more than your crusty ass so that’s there as well. next question?
  • (matt isn’t allowed to do press duty for the next week after that)
  • kevin, five drinks in and nearing tipsy: if renee ever became a villian we’d all be screwed
  • the rest of the foxes except for renee and andrew: AMEN
  • casual cheek kisses are a thing among the foxes but no one kisses neil around andrew unless they want to lose a toe
  • it isn’t a question if whether or not a drunk kevin has acidentally called andrew “aaron”, it’s whether or not kevin actually made it out alive
  • nicky matt, and neil all have a shared exasperation for White People Food
  • neil and renee have been banned from nearly evershopping center within 50 miles of palmetto bc they wouldn’t stop throwing the knives to test how sharp they were
  • aaron and andrew play pokemon against each other(even tho andrew is more partial to acnl) and andrew manages to beat aaron’s entire team with just a jigglypuff and no one knows how he did it
  • once neil got really drunk and before he went to bed he kissed everyone’s foreheads(aaron left right after neil kissed renee’s) like his mom used to do to him before she went to sleep and it left everyone in shock
I believe Spencer’s twin is coming.

In this post I want to give a list of reasons why Twincer is my prime suspect as AD. I know a lot of these ‘clues’ come from interviews, but they’re still really convincing for me at least. I’ve definitely missed some of the clues from within the show because they’re not as easy to spot - we need to know for sure if Twincer is happening, then we can dig further. (The fun won’t instantly stop once the finale airs.) But for now, enjoy these, and at the end, I give my theory as to the motive.

Please note: none of this is overly new. This is just the summation of everything we’ve been talking about on my blog for the past couple months. I wanted to put all the ideas into one post, rather than 31529 mini posts scattered here and there. I will be updating this as we find more. 

  1. The famous airport scene from 715.
    We all already think it’s weird that "Spencer" asked Ezra to not tell anyone he saw her there with Wren. What’s weirder, is the fact that Wren and “Spencer” were arguing. Amongst muffle, I heard Spencer say "stop calling me that" (let me know if you heard differently). Did Wren have a slip-of-the-tongue moment and call her Spencer rather than the twin’s real name?
  2. Dr. Cochran’s story is very telling.
    We all already know the ambiguous implication that Mary had more than two babies, because Dr. Cochran said he dealt with “two of Mary’s babies”. What’s more interesting is the second baby he dealt with. The first baby (Charlotte) he gave to Jessica. He said that the second baby that he delivered was placed in family county services. This could not have been Spencer, since Spencer was delivered to Veronica within 5 minutes of birth. So, who was that second baby that was placed in family services? I believe it was Spencer’s twin. Why? Dr Cochran referred to that second baby as “underweight but tenacious” - lo and behold, the next episode, Toby calls Spencer tenacious. This was the writers foreshadowing the similarities between this second baby, and Spencer. Twins. 
  3. We all know Hanna’s ‘dream’ in 701.
    It makes no sense that Hanna was able to dream ‘Spencer’ saying the name A.D. since Hanna was kidnapped before these initials were even revealed. Perhaps Hanna was visited by Twincer; the one holding her captive.
  4. A.D. needs to stand for something. 
    Spencer’s twin could literally have the initials A.D., since we know she would be Mary Drake’s child. Her first name would start with A and the D would stand for Drake. 
  5. Brendan and Ian both confessed to being confused by the identity of A.D.
    They needed the backstory to understand it. Is that because they had no idea who has the name “Alex Drake” (for example) ?
  6. Tyler said before 7B aired that “you’ve never met AD. You kind of have. You’ll know what I mean”.
    This can be interpreted in two ways: you’ve never met Twincer but since you know Spencer, you kind of know who AD is. Or. You’ve seen Twincer over the years, but thought it was Spencer. Either way, Tyler’s comment screams twin-theory to me. This could apply to any twin theory, but in this context, I’m using it for Spencer.
  7. Ian said (0:57) that “fans will be satisfied to a point. Right when it seems it’s gonna be really great, it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”….
    That cheeky smile on Ian’s face when he said “it seems it’s gonna be really great”… what could be greater than a liar being AD? Ian could be referring to the fact that they initially show us Troian under the hoodie, making us think Spencer is AD. Then, after commercial break, they will reveal it’s just her twin, hence the “it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”. We will be satisfied to a point, he said. It’ll start off amazing by thinking it’s Spencer, oh wait, it’s another twin.
  8. Ashley said (0:14) that she didn’t even know the A.D. reveal is possible.
    Because she did not expect a second pair of twins to come along?
  9. “It’s like there are two of you living in this house. You, and you’re evil twin, and we’re not sure who’s coming down to breakfast". 
    said Veronica to Spencer in 423. Foreshadowing at it’s finest.
  10. Spencer doesn’t remember this flashback.
    Was it her twin? And oh how coincidental, that the writers tell us a time Spencer doesn’t remember, in the same scene Veronica makes the above comment about Spencer’s “evil twin”.
  11. “Where are they?”
    said Mary as she entered the Hastings house (flashback from 717). Who is they? The twins? She proceeded to say that Spencer is the only good thing she’s ever made. Maybe Mary knows Spencer’s twin is evil, and is neglecting her. 
  12. “You look very much like your sister. Almost like twins”.
    said Mary to Spencer in 701. The writers wanted us to think that Mary was talking about Spencer and Melissa, since Mary was holding a picture of the half-sisters. But, were the writers, and therefore Mary, hinting towards Twincer? Is Mary being blackmailed/forced (by Peter?) to keep quiet on Twincer, and she had a slip-of-the-tongue moment here?
  13. Marlene is very aware of the Twincer theories.
    Back in 2014 she said that Troian sent her an online fan theory regarding Spencer having a twin who is A. Marlene was blown away by it and she thought it was a very well thought out plan with detailed evidence across the series. Watch from 1:35. Whilst you may be saying “there’s NO WAY Marlene spoilt her own show’s ending in an interview!!” - I feel like she had no idea the show would go on for 7 seasons, and once they got renewed, she panicked. “Shit, we need a new Uber A. Let’s go with that brilliant fan theory Troian sent me”. She probably regrets making this interview now. You can tell her passion for Twincer in this interview. She talks so damn highly of it.
  14. Marlene has said that the person who plays A.D. had known for a while.
    We know that Marlene told Troian the entire ending of the show years in advance. “Just like I had story time with Marlene, you all now get story time with Pretty Little Liars” said Troian.
  15. The girl in the coffin in the opening has the exact same black puffy shirt as Spencer.
  16. Why does it seem that A.D. is always going after the Hastings?
    Why shoot Spencer, out of all the liars? Why demand Aria to plant the audio device in the Hastings? Why not ruin the Marin household? The jealous twin wants her ungrateful sister dead, hence the shooting, and the jealous daughter is angry she never got adopted. Too much of the story is Hastings-oriented. 
  17. “They’re all some pretty. Good. Theories.”
    Was Janel’s response to being asked about the Spencer-twin theories. (22:20)
  18. And, I’ll just leave this here. Good one @prettylittlesessions​ !
  19. “Spencer’s” weird comments in 718.
    In 718 “Spencer” says to Toby “you know what its like to be the outsider. Removed from friends and family”. What made her say this? Nothing was said or done in 718 to prompt our Spencer to say this. 
  20. Keegan said there are no more Spoby kisses in 7B.
    “I can honestly say that there is not another Spoby kiss.” Yet - there was one in 718. Either Keegan lied, or that was Spencer’s twin. (10:15)
  21. “It’s somebody you have seen.”
    says Marlene in regards to who AD is. Was she talking about the Spoby kiss in 710, which Twincer referred to in 718 when she kissed Toby again? Marlene was very careful to avoid saying “it’s someone you KNOW”. We don't “know” Twincer. But, we have seen her.
  22. “That’s not the Spencer I know”
    said Toby in 718. Writers are foreshadowing.

Setting all this aside, I want to add my theory on the backstory and motive:

  • Twincer, who’s name is A_____ Drake, was born in Radley, as Dr. Cochran told us in 7A. 
  • Twincer was raised in Radley - not because she needed to be at a psychological hospital, but as a form of daycare, because Mary was deemed an unfit mother, and also she kept Twincer a secret from Peter… he already hated her (to the point of planning her murder, later on) enough for having one baby together, imagine Peter’s reaction to having twins.
  • There, Twincer met and bonded with her sister Charlotte. Charlotte became Twincer’s only friend. (Twincer might even be Bethany, since we already know of this bond between Bethany and Charlotte, and how Bethany was drawing Charles being taken away by a monster. But for this theory, let’s just forget Bethany for a second.)
  • When Mona came to Radley and started telling Charlotte about everything she did to her sister, Charlotte and Twincer wanted to play. They wanted a turn at harassing Spencer and her friends.
  • For Charlotte, as we know, it was the feeling of finally succeeding at something in life that made the game her drug. For Twincer, it was something far darker.
  • Harassing Aria, Hanna, Emily and Alison is all about driving a wedge between the girls. Twincer wants to break up the girls. Turn them against each other. Hopefully by throwing fire at the girls, they will break up, ultimately, to ruin Spencer’s life. Again, jealousy. Twincer’s plan is backfiring because it’s exactly A’s threats that makes Spencer say “we need each other more than ever” and “always stick together”. The writers keep making the point of SPENCER being the one to make the comments about “always” sticking together. Twincer cannot break Spencer and her bitches. This is fueling Twincer’s anger. Nothing is working.
  • That’s why AD/Twincer recently shot Spencer. “If I can’t break the girls up to ruin Spencer’s life, why not just become Spencer?” Twincer shot Spencer in an attempt to assume her identity and squeeze her way into the loving friendship group that she could never crack. “These girls are so loyal to each other… they don’t even break up after even my threats. Damn, I want to be a part of this. It’s my turn to live a happy life. You had your turn Spencer.”
  • Note: I do not believe that AD has been operating since season 1. Mona’s time as A is completely independent from Charlotte and Twincer’s story. Mona started the game, and now someone is ending it, and she wants to know who. Charlotte and Twincer are their own duo; their own A-team, which stemmed as a result of Mona coming to Radley. Charlotte revealed herself - next up in the A team is Twincer, who is carrying on the game she once played with her sister. 

RIVERDALE MEME.
episodes 1-4 / ( change pronouns as needed. )

CHAPTER 1: THE RIVER’S EDGE

  • “i’ve been thinking about us.”
  • “i’m asking you now if you love me.”
  • “of course i love you, ____. but i can’t give you the answer you want.”
  • “one summer can change everything.”
  • “it’s about following your heart, right?”
  • “as long as you don’t give up your passion.”
  • “eventually, there will be a reckoning.”
  • “that entitlement you wear on your head like a crown? it won’t last.”
  • “are you scared, ____?”
  • “don’t freak out. just trust me.”
  • “i’m breakfast at tiffany’s, but this place is strictly in cold blood.”
  • “he was looking for the girl next door. instead, he found me.”
  • “you wanted fire? sorry, _________. my specialty’s ice.”
  • “just… talk to her. it could go a long way. would have gone a long way with me.” 
  • “you are so perfect. i’ll never deserve you.”

CHAPTER 2: A TOUCH OF EVIL

  • “romeo and juliet are the exception, not the rule.”
  • “once again, fate throws us together.”
  • "sardonic humour is just my way of relating to the world.”
  • “what? what are you going to do?”
  • “i’m not. i want to be. i thought i could be. but it’s too much, too fast.”
  • “what do you know about it, _____? or about me, even?”
  • “he wasn’t perfect. but he always tried to do the right thing.”
  • “sometimes a friend is better than a boyfriend.”
  • “why don’t we both just do that bro thing where we nod like douches & mutually suppress our emotions?”
  • “is there something you want to tell me, pal?”
  • “did you & _______ kill him together?”
  • “i’m alone.”
  • “we’re not gonna hug in front of the entire town.”
  • “it’s like there was a train that was going to the rest of my life. & i just… missed it.”
  • “it is not my fault he doesn’t like you.”

CHAPTER 3: BODY DOUBLE

  • "spoken like a true good girl who always follows the rules.”
  • “i don’t follow rules, i make them. & when necessary, i break them.”
  • “nothing this bad was ever supposed to happen here.”
  • “you don’t want to slow down, do you?”
  • “they have zero remorse for the lives they destroy.”
  • “does he not know who i am?”
  • “i’d love to stay. but i gotta shake down an evil adventure scout.”
  • “not bad.”
  • “maybe i don’t know _______.”
  • “you came through for me. in a way no one else ever has before.”
  • “i would’ve done anything to protect _____.”
  • “i saw the way you looked at me. … you’re hiding something.”
  • “maybe we should slow it down a little.”
  • "she’s right.”
  • “would i have complete freedom?”

CHAPTER 4: THE LAST PICTURE SHOW

  • “where did you find all of this?”
  • “oh, i’m already there!”
  • “you’re right. i’m selfish, & i’m stupid.”
  • “make some room, outcasts.”
  • “what’s next, selling her hair extensions?”
  • “it’s off-brand & sends a false message about acceptance.”
  • “shut the hell up, or you’ll find out!”
  • “i just hate when people disrespect my cinematic experience.”
  • "i’ll figure it out. i always do.”
  • “you are not the things you said.” 
  • “you’re not stupid. this wasn’t your fault.”
  • “i have a strong inkling.”
  • “threatened, much?”
  • “i learned that from the nancy drew detective handbook.”
  • “if you really are my friend, you’ll drop this.”

anonymous asked:

I often have ideas for a scene or a character but there is no plot. How can I expand these ideas into stories? I just don't know what to do with my ideas to get a story out of them. Most plotting tips require that I know at least the beginning and the end of my story. But I don't even have that.

Hi Anonymous,

I’ve heard of other writers having this same problem, so you are not alone! Here are some ideas that come to mind when I think about this.

Coming up with a Plot (from scratch)

First off, you have ideas for characters or scenes, and that’s a starting point, and you probably (I’m assuming, because it wasn’t that long ago) saw my post, What to Outline When Starting a Story, which can give some guidance on what to consider. However, if you have no idea where to even come up with a concept for your plot that post can only be so much help.

Conflict out of Story Elements

Since you have some ideas about character and scene, I’d try building off that. In some cases, you might need to flesh those out a bit more to continue (I don’t know, since I don’t know how much you have those figured out).New York Times best-selling author David Farland points out in his book Million Dollar Outlines that characters grow out of their setting. We are all influenced by our setting–where we live, where we spend our time, what century we’re part of, etc.

Setting –> Character

Farland goes on to say that out of character (and setting) comes conflict:

Setting + Character –> Conflict

Plot obviously comes from some sort of conflict, the character reacting to and trying to solve that conflict or conflicts. But let’s finish out the diagram/equation.

Setting –> Character –> Conflict –> Theme

How conflicts are dealt with in the story create the theme.

It should be noted though that this diagram may not be helpful to everyone, and it’s also possible to work backwards from it. For example, I personally don’t like the idea of starting with the setting–although, realistically, pretty much all stories start there, if only to the most basic degrees (time period, real world vs. fantasy world, Earth vs. space, etc.). I often like to start with character. But as you work on your character, at some point, you are going to be looking back at what kind of life he grew out of and where he came from, and where he is now. Other people may like to start with conflict, and work back into character and setting. So, it doesn’t have to be linear.

But let’s look at the conflict part. You need some form of conflict to have plot. As I mentioned a few weeks ago in my post Are Your Conflicts Significant? the conflict should either be broad (far-reaching) or personal to the character. If it’s not either, it’s probably not that significant. However, it should be noted that you can make almost any conflict broad, or personal.

But how do you even get to that point? If you like Farland’s diagram, what I would suggest would be looking at those characters and setting. Brainstorm conflicts by asking yourself questions.

  • What conflict can come out of this setting?

For example, in some stories, major conflicts come straight out of the setting. Most if not all dystopians, like The Hunger Games fall into this category. You can even look at movies like Interstellar, which deals largely with space travel. The major conflict came out of a setting (Earth will soon be inhabitable). In a fantasy story, conflicts can come out of the world and worldbuilding (setting), whether it’s the magic system or the world itself. In Lord of the Rings, the major conflicts often come from the setting (Frodo has to make it to Mount Doom) and magic (the One Ring is a magical object that must be destroyed). In historical fiction, it can come out of setting–what are some of the conflicts the world was dealing with during WWII?

But what about something more small-scale than Panem, outer space, and Middle-earth? Setting can play a role there too. What kind of conflicts can come out of attending high school in 2017? What conflicts might be present there? What conflicts might come out of trying to start a career as a woman centuries ago? The story doesn’t have to be epic for this sort of brainstorming to work.

Les Miserableis a good example of how setting can play into conflicts, whether it’s being a struggling young mother, a convict, or participating in politics.

  • What conflict can come out of this character?

Once you have your character, you can try brainstorming conflicts for her. Now, there are sort of two ways to approach this.

One, you look at your character–her personality, strengths, weaknesses–and ask yourself, what would this character want? Figuring out what your character wants is often vital to a good story. In some stories, it can be more simple, basic, or straightforward. Maybe your character just wants money. In other cases, it might be bigger. Maybe your character wants to defeat an evil ruler. It can be somewhat philosophical. Maybe your character dreams of ridding the universe of a false god, like in His Dark Materials.

When you know what your character wants, you can start brainstorming conflicts by considering what could stop her from getting what she wants. In Lord of the Rings, Frodo volunteers to destroy the Ring, but there are literal obstacles in his way. Space, for one thing. He has to travel for miles and miles and miles. Then there are other people and creatures: orcs, Shelob, Sauron, even his own companions–these people are in conflict with him. He has to deal with getting hurt, wounded, and fatigued. All these things are keeping Frodo from his goal. And of course, his ultimate want is to return to the Shire, but he has to destroy the Ring first.

If your character wants to be in a relationship with someone, there are obstacles too. Maybe the love interest doesn’t know he exists. Maybe there is a family feud, like in Romeo and Juliet. Maybe there is a love triangle. Whatever your character wants, you start brainstorming what could keep him from getting it.

A second approach to brainstorming conflicts with character is to look at your character and consider what kind of situations would be difficult for them, what would make them grow. In some cases, they might be the reluctant hero. Love him or hate him, as I mentioned a few weeks ago, Edward Cullen is a good example of this sort of thing. He’s a “vegetarian” vampire living his life, and then out of nowhere, a girl shows up that is basically his personal brand of cocaine. How is he supposed to deal with this? Worse. He has feelings for her. Immediately, Edward is in conflict.

Now, you can combine both methods. And in reality, both those examples have both. Sure, Frodo volunteered to take the Ring, but he was basically the only person who could. But look at him. He’s just a humble hobbit. He doesn’t do magic, he doesn’t know warfare, and he knows very little about the world. But he’s thrown into a situation where those characteristics will be tested. Similarly, Edward is thrown into a situation, but he ends up having wants too. He wants to be in a relationship with Bella. But the fact he is a vampire and she has potent blood is a conflict that impedes that.

So you can brainstorm conflicts from setting and character.

Plot out of Conflict Types

Let’s look at this another way.

There are five types of conflict.

Keep reading

Let’s think about this shall we…

There’s an 11-year old boy who has never known love or affection or anything good really. He’s an outcast in his own home, made to feel like he’s worthless

…but then this great thing happens…he’s a wizard, like what the…? An entire new world is opened to him and he gets to leave this horrible place, there’s a world out there where he’s…a hero? That’s crazy! And he gets to go to school with other wizards, kids just like him…he’s so excited… but he’s so nervous too…he just wants to matter, to someone…

…and he meets this boy - with red hair and dirt on his nose - a boy who just wants to be noticed for once…he wants to be good-looking, like his big brother Bill, and brave like his other big brother Charlie, and clever like his brother Percy, and funny like the twins…he doesn’t think he’s any of those…he’s going to shame the family name and be stuck in Hufflepuff - or worse, Slytherin! How is he going to ever live that down?!?!?! He’d never be able to go back home…! 

…he just wants to matter to someone. Looked to for guidance, like his opinion was important. Like he wasn’t the runt of the litter, that all the good qualities were passed liberally among his siblings, but he got the very least of it….toad? No, he hadn’t seen a toad…hey! He didn’t know that wasn’t a proper spell! Why that little know-it-all….!

…she didn’t mean to embarrass him really but much better tell him now before he embarrasses himself during lessons… Oh, she was so excited…! Magic was real! And there was a school about it, can you imagine…?!?!?! Oh, she was finally going to be accepted…! She was sure no one at Hogwarts were going to call her names like at her old school… She was going to make so many friends here! Friends that looked beyond her big teeth and crazy hair…

…she just wants to matter, to someone. To be seen as more than just a brain, to be valued for who she was. She’s seen the way the other kids would share secrets during recess. She wanted to share her secrets, too…oh, they were here!!!!

Three kids - coming from different worlds and backgrounds - met on a train, going to a magical new place. They didn’t know what lay ahead of them, didn’t know that together, they’d face down the greatest evil that their world had known. They were just kids - babies, to some - who wanted to matter. Bogged down with their own personal insecurities and wanting to just…belong

Noticed.

Accepted

What they each longed for before they got on that train to Hogwarts - they found in each other. Harry found family in Ron & Hermione, the siblings he didn’t even know he was longing for until he found them. Ron wasn’t just another Weasley…he was Ron. He mattered. For himself. Hermione found a sibling in Harry, the love of her life in Ron. She wasn’t some annoying know-it-all to them - she was…important

How amazing is it…to find two of the most important people in your life…on a wizarding train headed to Scotland…? 

Highlights from Talks Machina (Episode 105)

Again, covering for @eponymous-rose​ while she continues her international vacation! Sorry for missing last week–things got crazy! Tonight’s guests: Darin de Paul, Taliesin sporting a lovely scarlet mohawk, and Travis. Brian starts a story that ends with him forging several signatures, and off we go.

  • The new campaign guide comes out soon! Taliesin is now worried about messing up the history of a character he invented.
  • Darin loves D&D as a long-form improv exercise and is happy he was able to get moments with each of the cast members.
  • Right after college, Darin was an apprentice at the Burt Reynolds Theater in Florida (a year-long program for theater students). One of his co-apprentices was Matt’s mom, and Matt’s grandmother was the director’s assistant. Matt’s father was part of the writing room. During the run of Darin’s last show (Fiddler), a clarinet player said they were going to play D&D and invited Darin. Matt’s mother was also in the group; they were all new to the game, so they rolled on a table for names and played four sessions. Last year, Darin was hired by Blizzard to do various voices, which is where he and Matt became friends. Later, Matt realized his mom had a picture of herself with Darin de Paul, and discussion of that picture led to the conversation of their D&D game. It’s been 37 years since Sprigg’s original campaign.
  • Matt was worried about fitting Sprigg in until Darin mentioned he was a hermit. The hobgoblin TPK was canon! Sprigg, a chaotic evil illusionist thief, was the only one to survive; the last moment of that campaign had him fleeing on a cart with wolves chasing him, abandoning the rest of the party to their deaths. Travis and Taliesin ask if he really was chaotic evil; “Why do you think he was so interested in redemption, dear boy?”
  • The first episode Darin saw was the Trials of the Take episode when the carpet was destroyed. He’s wanted to be on the show ever since.
  • Symmetra’s voice actor, Anjali Bhimani, also plays D&D. My heart skips a few beats.
  • Vex and Percy eloped over the year break. Laura and Taliesin kept it secret out of pique at first (Taliesin doesn’t remember why they were piqued). He’s not surprised the others are annoyed.
  • Grog was extremely impressed by Sarenrae and hasn’t thought much about Kord giving him any boons.
  • Darin has been a fan of the show and watching for some time. Taliesin says he is the most prepared guest they’ve ever had.
  • Very few people were present at Vex & Percy’s wedding. They did not intend to ever bring it up on their own.
  • The plane of books is the worst possible plane for Grog. Only the plane of shopping would be worse.
  • As soon as Darin walked into the studio last Thursday, Travis immediately asked him if he was a god. Travis still thinks he might be.
  • Percy would rather have a thousand years with Vex than a thousand years with Ioun’s library.
  • Travis wants a “positive, upbeat resolution to all the drama that is a-hanging in the air.” Me too. Travis does not read the Player’s Handbook to help keep Grog dumb, so he never knows what’s going on.
  • Travis loves how prepared Darin was. He offered the Deck because he thought Darin was looking for something specific after Sprigg deflected the weaker offerings.
  • Darin loved the emotion in the room during the plane shift and the strong moment with Marisha in particular. He also likes the movie Gargoyles.
  • The hardest thing about playing Sprigg after so long was finding him again. Brian gets very sentimental about the long journey that brought Sprigg back to life, including Darin becoming friends and colleagues with Matt so many years later.
  • Darin will be back on the next episode and is visibly excited about it.
  • Darin used to read tons of D&D books (mentions Drizzt by name) and used to paint minis as a hobby. He still has some of the figures and wants to donate them to the show.
  • Darin’s wife was part of Taliesin’s parents’ circle, so he’s known her for a long time. Taliesin and Darin exchange memories of meeting Roddy McDowall, and Darin says part of Sprigg’s concept of memories being the most important came from a conversation he had with Roddy while Roddy was dying of cancer.
  • Percy’s current distrusting attitude towards the gods came directly from his interaction with the Raven Queen. However, he didn’t know there was a god of knowledge and has been “chewing on it a lot, and what it means to have faith in knowledge.” He sees the library as a testament to faith in humanity and the good works of life and how important memory is and is blown away by it. “Books have always been about finding meaning and this whole library thing has changed him.” Taliesin expected Percy to be much more resistant to Ioun and was surprised at how quickly the books sold him.
  • Darin felt as the scenes progressed that his role was to “illuminate” CR as to where they were and what they could be. Taliesin and Percy both wondered if he was Scanlan from the future. Darin had the choice of being Scanlan’s dad, but declined.
  • Percy picked Vesper because her namesake was the last person he’d talked to in real life.
  • The only place Travis can think of worse for Grog is if the books were replaced with clothing & a For Sale sign. “Grog has a beatnik poet inside him waiting to get out.”
  • Darin’s advice to Keyleth was total improv. He almost cried when she touched his hand. He loves funny characters that can become sad and/or touching.
  • Marisha has no idea how to get Keyleth out of her emotional nosedive. Watching Marisha break character from Keyleth at the end of an episode is one of Taliesin’s favorite things because they’re such different people.
  • Percy would seek out the lifebooks for all his family & ancestry because he’s fascinated with legacy, and Whitestone is full of ghost stories. He had lots of stories he’d planned to give as part of the gnomes’ tour, and tells one about a woman forced into a marriage who slowly poisoned her husband over a number of years.
  • Sprigg feels he is what Scanlan might become. He did not expect to survive the episode.
  • If they were really in Ioun’s halls, Travis would love to see the books of his family and of JFK. Darin would like to see his father’s book. Darin also likes wearing suits, which is why he wears suits. He only wears t-shirts at the gym. (At one point Darin’s family also owned 20 horses???). He wishes his parents could see him now because they were so supportive when he was growing up.

Honor! Justice! After Dark, After Dark, After Dark!

  • If the challenge for Ioun involves any physical activity, Grog will fight Percy for it.
  • Bucket lists: Travis wants to swim with a great white shark. (Darin’s biggest fear is great white sharks.) Taliesin wants to travel to India. Darin wants to learn to tap dance, and casually drops that he used to dance with Cirque du Soleil.
  • Darin’s favorite color is black. His favorite season is winter.
  • There’s a video somewhere of Darin de Paul and Steve Blum pretending to be zombies and running towards the camera.
  • Travis and Darin do Reinhardt “impressions” by talking in high-pitched baby voices. Taliesin does a pretty decent actual impression! Darin likes that there’s heroes for every playstyle.
  • Darin hasn’t told Matt’s parents he brought back Sprigg. He also used to have a crush on Matt’s mom.
  • If Darin could pick any character from VM to play, he would play Scanlan. Brian teases the entire world by saying he would play “the character Pike’s in love with.”
  • Darin’s twitter flooded after last Thursday and he wishes he could respond to all of the kind messages.
  • Darin once shared floss with Gilbert Gottfried as part of an old bit.
  • Darin feels his whole history has led to this moment last Thursday where he had the chance to create a story with people he loved.
  • Laura read the Game of Thrones books as they came out, well before the show started. Brian just found the copy of the first book she lent him in 2010, which he still hasn’t read.
  • If Sprigg could fight any D&D monster, it would be a hobgoblin.
mum

Sirius Black had always traveled to King’s Cross with incredible joy in his heart knowing that he wouldn’t have to return to Grimmauld Place, 12 for several months and that he wouldn’t see his family for a very long time. This was the first time Sirius had trouble getting out of his bed on 1st of September. He didn’t know how to explain it but it felt like a hippogriff was sitting on his chest making it hard to breathe.

“Padfoot,” sighed James. “If you make me miss the train, I will steal all of Remus’ chocolate and blame it on you and he will believe me.”

“Idunwanowunintmmawf,” said Sirius into his pillow. 

“I’m sorry, what?”

“I don’t want to run into my mother,” he replied sitting up realising he didn’t have the strength to deal with James Potter at the moment. 

“We will move quickly and we won’t see even a string of her hair,” smiled James. “That’s a promise, Pads.”

“But she will see us Prongs,” mumbled Sirius looking like a lost puppy. “That bitch has her ways, she always finds me and Regulus in the crowd.”

“Don’t be fucking ridiculous and get out of the bed” ordered James in return as he attempted carrying his trunk down the stairs for a second. “MUUUUUM can I locomotor my trunk dooooownn?”

“NO,” said Euphemia sternly from downstairs. “You’ll carry it down James and so will Sirius.”

“But muuuum-”

“James, dear, you are sixteen years old,” explained his mum like she was talking to a small child to make sure he doesn’t set the house on fire. “Stop acting like you are four or that girl you like so much won’t even look your way let alone like you. Independent women like grown men, not needy children.”

Euphemia Potter had a way with her son, she knew where all of his buttons were and how to push them just right because James Potter and his trunk were downstairs the Muggle way in a minute after the pep talk she had given. 

The breakfast was calmer than usual with Fleamont being at work and Sirius acting like he is half dead. When they were completely ready to floo themselves to the train station, Euphemia put her hand softly on Sirius’ shoulder, a kind of touch he wasn’t still used to after almost two months.

“Sirius,” began Euphemia. “What’s wrong? You know you can talk to me.”

“I just really don’t want to run into my mother,” confessed Sirius. “I’m scared of what she might do to you.”

James shook his head in disbelief, he found it hard to understand the irrational fear Sirius had. He knew Walburga was one disturbed woman but he also knew his mother shouldn’t be underestimated.

“Walburga should be scared of running into me,” said Euphemia half jokingly but James knew what would happen if they were to run into that woman. “I can handle him dear.”

Sirius nodded as convincingly as he could before he grabbed floo powder from the porcelain bowl standing next to the marble fireplace.

“King’s Cross,” he said clearly and he was gone with the green flames in seconds.

It didn’t take long for James and his mum to come with the flames. They hurried towards the Platform 9 ¾ with their trolleys and James ran face first into the wall just to disappear into thin air and then Euphemia and Sirius ran to the other side of the wall as well. 

Hogwarts Express was standing with all it’s crimson glory waiting for the students to get in to take them to Hogwarts. The three of them walked hastily to where the Marauders’ compartment was. They stood in front of the door to say their goodbyes.

“Be good,” said Euphemia. “I don’t want any letters from Minerva this year James.”

“Mum, you know I can’t promise anything.”

“Where did I go wrong while raising you?” she asked curiously. “Don’t answer that.”

“Sirius, write to me whenever you feel like it,” she reminded. “I’ll be expecting you home for Christmas, alright?”

“Yes, mum,” said Sirius and choked on his words almost instantly as a warm smile formed on Euphemia’s lips and James’ eyes lit up like they were fairy lights.

“Tsk tsk, Sirius,” came Walburga’s cold voice behind them. “We shouldn’t call blood traitors who didn’t give birth to us ‘mum’.”

It seemed like Sirius had shrunk in size as Euphemia stepped in front of him protectively.

“Tsk tsk Walburga,” she repeated. “We shouldn’t eavesdrop on conversations that aren’t ours and give opinions that no one asked for. He can call me ‘mum’ whenever he wants to, seeing that his actual mother is not available at the moment.”

Walburga made an attempt to grab Sirius by the wrist but Euphemia was agile for her age and she was holding onto Sirius’ wrist like he would die if she let go.

“You won’t touch my son and I’m not talking about James.”

“I suggest you stay out of this Euphemia, this is none of your business.”

“Oh, you made it my business when this boy showed up in my living room, barely breathing,” shot back Euphemia with all the rage that had been building up in her. Sirius was hiding behind her, careful not to catch Walburga’s piercing eyes.

“You are exaggerating,” she replied. “Nothing wrong with a little tough love.”

“I know an Unforgivable Curse when I see one Walburga,” she hissed just loud enough for people around them to hear, Walburga was turning purple with anger. “If I could, I would take Regulus from you, too, before he ends up dead from your tough love.”

“How dare you speak to me like that?”

“The same way you dare torture your children Walburga,” she said without blinking. “Now let go of my wrist and stay away from my sons.”

Sirius was trembling behind Euphemia who was standing like she was the queen of the universe, she didn’t move until Walburga Black turned around and left. 

“I told you I could handle her,” she said with a reassuring smile and caressed Sirius’ cheek softly. Sirius noticed the marks on Euphemia’s wrist then, burn marks like the long boney fingers of his mother. “As long as you got me, she can never come close to you and know that there’s nothing wrong with you calling me mum. Anyone would be proud to have you as a son and I am, too.”

“I- I can heal that if y-you want m-mum,” said Sirius, his voice shaking with the weight he was feeling on his shoulders. “I’ve- I’ve gotten pretty g-good with h-healing charms.”

“No Sirius, I can fix it. You forget you are not allowed to practice magic outside of Hogwarts,” she reminded and laughed a little. “It’s funny that a woman of her age is unable to control her magic like a toddler.”

Sirius’ eyes were still fixed on Euphemia’s thin wrist, his eyes filling up with the anger and sadness he was feeling. He lifted his eyes just a little to give a guilty look to James and saw his best friend smiling warmly down at him, he didn’t hide his pity but he didn’t have to. James always found it rather unlucky that Sirius ended up in such a messy family and never lied about how he felt about that situation, his pity was because he cared.

“Mum’s a big girl mate,” he said like he knew Sirius was about to spiral down and he needed someone to say something, anything. “She can take care of herself.”

“He is right, love,” nodded Euphemia. “Now, off you go, we don’t want you to miss the train because of something as unimportant and miserable as Walburga.”

“Just call her a bitch, mum.”

“James Fleamont Potter,” began Euphemia as she jokingly flicked her son’s arm. “You kiss me with that mouth and you will stop saying that word, even though some people deserve it, or so help me Merlin I’ll ground you until the end of time.”

“Okay, okay,” surrendered James. “I’ll just call her a goblin.”

“That’s my boy,” she replied and the spark came back to Sirius’ grey eyes. Euphemia hugged both of them and gave them loud kisses before she pushed them towards the train. “Don’t forget to write to me when you get there.”

“Sure, mum,” said Sirius with a grin before he was dragged away by an over eager James.

here are a bunch of fucking fantastic fics I’ve enjoyed and loved reading throughout the month of october. I recommend that you read these great fics in november, if you haven’t already!! also check out the Reverse Big Bang and 31 Days of Smut!

(all fics with a star are my favorites and if there are two stars then it was a favorite favorite)


1. Damn the Dark, Damn the Light 20k

“Why is this face of beauty ringing so true?” The genuine confusion in Harry’s voice causes Louis’ chest to painfully twinge. “You’re a complete stranger in my eyes, William Shakespeare, but not in my heart. How is that possible?”

Louis wants to live out every romance plot he has ever written in his own life. He wants to be the protagonist of his own narrative, the hero who finds true love and gets his happy ending. Instead, Louis is stuck with only dreaming of such wild fantasies and writing them down. He can create entire romances in his dreams, yet he can never live one.

2. Threadbare 20k**

Harry Styles was eight years old when Louis Tomlinson kept him from falling into a machine in a Manchester textile mill. He was 18 years old when nothing, not even the threat of death, could keep Harry from falling in love with Louis.

3. Don’t Come Down 6k

Louis takes Harry home to meet the family.

4. I’ll Take Your Pain 2k*

Or, soulmates have the ability to feel each other’s pain, and Harry finds his after getting his arse waxed.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Well, this is kinda angsty, but can I request a scenario where zen & mc are together and in the last rfa party zen slept with jaehee and after a few days jaehee couldn't deal with the blame and told mc in front of all rfa but MC pretended not to believe her (andthenrfa*cof*saeran*cof*tryingtocomforther). This is ridiculously specific, i know lolol but feel free if you don't want to do it, it's okay, or if you want to change anything just do it 😅 I love love love your blog and your writing ❤❤❤❤❤

Ok so this post actually ended up being realllly long and I don’t know how to do the ‘read more’ thing so I’m really sorry to anyone trying to scroll by
Oops 

And I’m so glad you like my writing, and I’m also really glad I got this request because at first I wasn’t sure how to write it (I basically ended up writing a fanfiction using bullet points haha oops) but I had a lot of fun doing it.

Disclaimer: I don’t think Zen would ever cheat and I actually don’t think Jaehee has any romantic feelings for him, just admiring adoration.

And I know you said I could change things
but it’s rlly angsty 
and I’m an angst monster and I kinda love it sooo i’m gonna keep it exactly how you wrote it  

let’s do it

  • Zen had always been flirty with you
  • And at some point..you had started flirting back
  • And soon it was more than flirting and you found yourself head over heels for each other
  • Constant phone calls too each other where you’d gush over how you wished you could see each other
  • Good morning and Goodnight texts
  • The occasional shameless flirt in the public chat
  • Once you two met at the first RFA party it was like a scene from a Disney movie, you two all but ran to each other and he swung you around once he snagged you in a tight embrace
  • Looking into his eyes you swore this could be love
  • He did too.
  • He really did swear he was in love with you
  • You were everything he had hoped and more
  • You were the person that woke him up everyday and put a smile on his face, you were the person that he thought of when love songs came on the radio, when he was on stage you were his muse, when he lay down to sleep at night you were the final thought in his head, and the first one in his dreams.
  • The next RFA party was a few months after you two had first met in person, only a couple months into your very happy relationship
  • You two had spent the first half of the night joined at the hip, happily enjoying each other’s company.
  • But somewhere throughout the nights timeline you both got distracted by separate guests and acquaintances and wandered away from each other.
  • Zen started drinking. Whoever he was talking to kept egging him on and the two of them were having a good ole time, which is rare for Zen in these occasions because the guests are usually upper class aristocrats like Jumin or if they are there for Zen, it’s as fans instead of friends
  • So he thought he’d treat himself
  • It got to be a bit much
  • The other guests were starting to notice and Jumin was not going to have the press covering Zen’s drunken gusto at an RFA event
  • “Assistant Kang,” Jumin sauntered over to Jaehee while keeping his eyes on Zen. “please escort Hyun to the back where he can cool down, out of the cameras’ lines of sight.”
  • “Of course, Mr. Han” And Jaehee was off. She was relieved that she had an excuse to get Zen out of the room, she too recognized the bad press that could follow this event but felt she hadn’t had the authority to tell Zen otherwise
  • But under the guise of Jumin’s will, she was able to convince Zen to head to the back so ‘Jumin wouldn’t bitch’ (in the words of the actor).
  • Soon it was just the two of them in the back room, Jaehee giving Zen water as he yanked at his shirt collar, complaining it was hot.
  • In his drunken shenanigens he managed to undo all his buttons at some point while Jaehee was getting more water, so she came back to shirtless Zen.
  • Zen knew those eyes.
  • As the assistant stared at his pectorals with a slight blush on her cheeks, he looked into her eyes and saw something
  • Adoration. Admiration. Want.
  • She wanted him.
  • Somewhere, deep in his psyche, behind the pseudo narcissist wall, 10 year old Hyun Ryu craved the attention. The positive attention his mom said he’d never get
  • He had you
  • But in that moment he had Jaehee too, and he couldn’t turn that down
  • Jaehee doesn’t even know how it initiated, she just recalls Zen pressing her against the wall and kissing her with a passion she’s never felt before.
  • His hands undoing the buttons of her shirt
  • His lips whispering praises of how she was not only successful, but also beautiful. And so sweet. And smart. And-
  • She almost cried. Someone as talented as Zen saw something so great in someone as plain as her? Impossible.
  • But he kept assuring her, and touching her, and loving her
  • Loving her the way he should have been loving you
  • The guilt hit her, but she watched it disappear as ecstasy took over
  • Zen passed out once they were both finished, pants undone and shirt wide open, but eyes closed and soft breaths flying in and out of his lips
  • Jaehee was wide awake though.
  • She was leaning against the wall, clothes messily pulled back on and tears threatening her eyes
  • The guilt was back and it felt like the weight of the world’s biggest mistake was sitting on her shoulders
  • She put her hands over her mouth as she stared at Zen, and she started crying when she thought of you.
  • “What have I done?”
  •  
  • After every party, the RFA gets together a few days later to go over logistics. What worked, what didn’t, who came, how to convince more people to come, etc
  • Jaehee’s heart dropped as you and Zen walked in together, a bright smile on your face, a blank slate on his.
  • No not blank
  • When Jaehee met his crimson eyes she saw it, the same thing he probably saw in her eyes: Guilt. Remorse. Regret.
  • She could barely stomach the feel as you greeted her and hugged her
  • “Jaehee! Good to see you! I feel like we didn’t get to talk much at the party thanks to someone making a little scene” As you pulled away you playfully rolled your eyes towards Zen. 
  • He just gave a nervous chuckle
  • Jaehee opened her mouth, ready to spill her guts, only to find it was dry as cotton. 
  • You gave her a quizzical look, ready to ask what was wrong, but Jumin’s voice interrupted with “Shall we begin?” looking pointedly at the three of you.
  • “Yahoo~” Seven cheered as he plopped down next to Saeran, who had recently been getting dragged along to all the RFA meetings, given he tended to just sit in the corner and pout.
  • Much like right now. He did little more than look at you and nod, which was as courteous a greeting as you were going to get with him.
  • Yoosung nodded, signaling everyone was ready, and the discussion began
  •  
  • You all were about 30 minutes into the conversation
  • Except for Jaehee
  • She couldn’t stop thinking about what happened the night of the party
  • She couldn’t stop looking at you and feeling guilty
  • She couldn’t stop thinking about telling you
  • “I need water” She stood up abruptly, startling everyone a bit
  • Jumin had a bit of an annoyed look on his face but conceded with “Fine. Quick 5 minute break for everyone”
  • Jaehee booked it to the kitchen
  • “Uh…I’m thirsty too.” Cue Zen bee-lining after her.
  • “Are you Okay??” He asked in a harsh whisper
  • “No I’m not okay!” Jaehee hissed back “We…we have to tell her.”
  • “No!” Zen’s eyes widened “No. You and I both know it was a mistake that will never happen again. She doesn’t need to know.”
  • “Zen if you love her-”
  • “I do love her!” He snapped back “I love her which is why I can’t lose her Jaehee. I know we messed up, I do. But..I can’t lose her over my mistakes” His eyes were pleading even more than his voice
  • Jaehee just stared into the crimson orbs, feeling the knot in her stomach grow. She just weakly nodded.
  • There was a moment of silence before she chugged her glass of water and turned to head back towards the living room where everyone was seated
  • She took a strong stride in
  • She bit her tongue
  • She was not going to-
  • You were the first face she met walking back in
  • Your smile welcoming her back to the circle
  • Your eyes cheery
  • Your heart open to her as it had been since the first day even when she treated you coldly.
  • Zen was right behind Jaehee and nearly bumped into her when she stopped dead in her tracks
  • “Jaehee?” You and he called at the same time, him due to her abrupt stop, and you because of the tears suddenly pouring from her eyes.
  • “Jaehee what’s wrong?” You rushed to her, attracting everyone’s attention
  • You caught Zen’s face from over her shoulder, his eyes wide. Knowing.
  • “M-MC” Jaehee choked out
  • “W-What is it?” You asked worriedly taking her trembling hands in yours
  • “MC” Her voice fell. There was just a moment of silence. Everyone in the room was looking, the outburst had even taken a hold of Saeran’s full attention.
  • “Zen and I…we’ve done something awful” 
  • You knew what she was suggesting but..no. No you didn’t. No way that’s what she meant you’re just confusing things.
  • “…What did you do?” You asked cautiously
  • Sniffling. Endless sniffling. You looked to Zen, who was pale and looked like he was also ready to cry.
  • “Zen…what happened?”
  • “I’m so sorry” He managed to get out before the lump in his throat clogged his vocal cords.
  • “At the party MC we- we had….” Jaehee couldn’t get the filthy three letter word out of her mouth
  • You dropped her hands and looked to Zen
  • “MC I’m so sorry” Zen repeated, his voice shaking even more
  • Everyone was quiet, waiting for your response
  • You had none. Just an empty stare and mouth slightly agape, waiting for words to come out of their own accord
  •  Finally they did
  • “This is a really cruel joke to play” You feigned a very obvious forced smile as your eyes blinked back tears “I never thought you guys would do such a thing..haha” You wiped a way a small drop ready to roll down your cheek
  • “MC!” Jaehee exclaimed “This isn’t-”
  • “Jaehee.” Your voice dropped. “I really don’t find this funny.”
  • “Neither do I!” The brown haired girl went to take your hand again but you pulled away
  • “And Zen” You turned to him “I don’t- I don’t know..how…” You couldn’t finish the sentence
  • They were everywhere. Pouring down your face, flooding your eyes, gathering in a small pool at your chin. It was an onslaught of tears rolling down your cheeks, choking your words, your thoughts, your everything.
  • “MC” Zen reached out to you, only to have his hand swatted away by yours.
  • You just stared at him and cried, forcing him to look you in the eyes as your faux smile fell to pieces. 
  • You felt a hand softly fall upon your shoulder, and you turned to see Seven looking at you, apologetic pity in his eyes. Saeran stood behind him, wearing an angrier version of his twin’s sentiment. 
  • “Let’s go for a ride, get some fresh air, huh MC?” The red head’s voice was soft
  • You softly nodded and let him guide you towards the door, not even able to muster up to energy to look back at Jaehee and Zen. 
  • Saeran did however, and he looked back towards the two with a face full of disgust, up until the moment he slammed the door
  • “what a good meeting” Jumin grumbled under his breath as he turned a disdainful eye towards Zen
  •  
  • You drove for a couple hours probably. Most of it in silence, but a comfortable one. You were in the passenger seat and Saeran was in the back, Seven at the wheel finding desolate roads and flying down them, giving the wind of your open window some sort of purifying feeling. It stung, but it felt good. Your hair whipped around and the land raced by and you occasionally sobbed but that was ok.
  • Eventually you found yourself back at the Chois’ place, sitting on the couch, staring at a TV playing a movie that you hadn’t been paying attention to for the last hour. Your mind was elsewhere, wondering what you had done wrong.
  • You looked at the carton of ice cream in your hand, only doing so because the sight of Saeran setting his own empty one on the coffee table had triggered you to remember Seven had given you your own carton to drown your sorrows in.
  • The redhead had actually gone out to buy more, so it was just you and Saeran on the black leather couch staring at the TV screen.
  • “Do you want this?” You offered the ice cream to Saeran who’s expression turned from bored to surprised, probably because you’d been silent for the past six hours aside from a sob here and there.
  • “You don’t want it?”
  • “I’m not hungry”
  • He stared at you and the carton for a second, his face unreadable.
  • He wanted to insist you eat the ice cream, because personally he found it to always make him feel better, but he figured you didn’t want to hear it.
  • He took the carton from your hands and placed it on the table in front of you two
  • Silence aside from the noise of the TV.
  • He cast a glance to you, only to find your eyes on the floor.
  • “doyou wantalk” You barely understood what he said it was so quiet
  • “What?” You looked to him
  • He thought you were asking out of surprise rather than inaudibility and “My therapist…he says that talking things out makes you feel better.” He looked indignant for a moment, likely remembering how stupid he felt when he rejected the idea only to find later that his therapist had been correct
  • “I…I have nothing to say” Your shell of a voice whispered
  • Saeran furrowed his brows at you. “Say you hate them”
  • “What?”
  • His voice raised a bit “You hate them don’t you? So say it. The therapist said talk about your feelings so start there. They’re scumbags who hurt you and deser-”
  • “No!” You’re voice hit a volume it hadn’t reached in hours. “I don’t hate them!”
  • Saeran was mixed with confusion and anger “What do you mean you don’t hate them? One of your best friends and your boyfriend fucked-”
  • There it was
  • Someone finally said it.
  • The hot tears made a return and began rolling down your cheeks as sudden sobs erupted from your mouth
  • Saeran was alarmed at the sudden show and tried to pinpoint the trigger. He supposes it could be his last sentence but it’s not as if it wasn’t something we all knew.
  • “I….I don’t hate them” You cried once the worst of the sobs subsided.”I don’t even think I want to hate them. I mean it’d be easier but…I don’t. Jaehee…it’s not her fault. She just..got wrapped up in it all. And she’s always liked Zen. How could she have said no. And he..he was drunk” You sputtered out your rationalizations to find that they only annoyed Saeran
  • “The Assistant should still no better. But fine. You know what? She’s not dating you, and clearly she triggered you finding out the truth. So let’s pretend she’s ok? What about the actor? I don’t care that he was drunk. There’s no excuse for him doing that!” The white haired boys voice had become louder and louder, fists clenching tighter and tighter as he began riling up old feelings of betrayal he once felt. “He abandoned you! He left you in the dust and for what? He failed you!”
  • You don’t know when it happened but Saeran had turned towards you and grabbed your hands, squeezing them tight in between his own. His mouth was contorted into some sort of snarl and you saw a fire raging behind his minty eyes. 
  • “Saeran..you’re hurting my hands” You squeaked out.
  • Your small voice dragged him out of whatever memory he was reliving and he sort of faded back into reality with a few blinks of his eyes before turning his attention to his hands. He let go of yours and in a flat voice uttered a “sorry”.
  • You guys were silent again, just staring at the floor, both living in whatever sad memory chose to cross your brains.
  • “You deserve better is all” He finally said.
  • “I know” You replied, voice empty of any real feeling.
  • You looked up, staring at the TV but not actually watching as a man on a horse offered a hand towards a young woman. “I just can’t stop thinking about him. About the him I fell in love with. Is he really gone?”
  • Saeran followed your gaze to the TV, looking on as the girl hopped on the horse. “I think so. That’s assuming he was the guy you thought he was at any point.”
  • “He was.” You said, a little defensive. Saeran looked towards you, watching your emotionless expression, knowing that there was a storm underneath despite the calm appearance. He knew because he often did the same, rocking a stoic appearance while watching all hell break loose in his own head.
  • “Is this the part where I say ‘It gets better’?” 
  • “Do you believe that it does?”
  • “Not a fuckin’ chance” A bitter smirk twisted his lips 
  • “I appreciate the honesty” You sighed
  • “Not in the way that we think it will anyway” He looked off into space somewhere.
  • “Hm?” You turned to him
  • “Everyone imagines that one day soon they’re going to wake up and suddenly it’s not going to hurt anymore. That there’s gonna be a day when you don’t think about this. You’re always gonna think about it. You’re always gonna wonder what you did wrong. Why God hates you. What things would be like if it didn’t happen.”
  • “You don’t think that there can be a day when it all feels ok?” You ask, partially to heal your hopeless heart, and partially because you see Saeran is projecting his own feelings and you’re curious to know how he feels.
  • “Maybe. I haven’t hit it yet though. Doubt I will.” 
  • You stared as he looked off into the distance, feeling as if you could see the scenes of his past playing in his eyes.
  • You were just about to recede back into your ball of depression and hopelessness before he spoke again and took your attention
  • “But that’s me. You’re…you, MC” your questioning look prompted him to continue “You’re…a good person.”
  • “You are to-” You went to say but he cut you off by turning and leaning towards you with a new intensity in his face.
  • “Not like you. If at all” He scoffed. “ You though, everyone loves you. And they’re right too. Because…” suddenly he stopped himself, seeming to turn a little shy.
  • “Because?” You wanted, no, needed to hear this.
  • He gulped down his fear and turned his eyes to the side, unable to look at you as he delivered his next few words, scared of you seeing through him even more than you usually do. 
  • “MC, you’re..everything. You’re smart, you’re cute, and you’re …kind. You always know what to say to help everyone. And that’s the thing. You try to help people, even people trying to hurt you…” His eyes turned back to you “You saw a good in me even when I didn’t. You risked your life to help my brother to save me. You’re…kind of like an angel.”
  • You just stared, taken aback by such kind words, from Saeran of all people. 
  • You were right to be surprised, he wasn’t usually this smooth in conveying his feelings verbally…there must have just been something about you that made it easy for him to talk.
  • “If it gets better for anyone, it’ll be for you, MC” He reached for your hand out of instinct, but pulled back instantly when your skin touched, as if he just realized what he was doing. His eyes did the same, it looked like he just realized how vulnerable he was in that moment, and a sort of wall was raised behind his irises and his whole body tensed a bit.
  • He was scared of being rejected.
  •  …
  • Your hand slowly reached out to his, which was floating in the space between you two, and when he didn’t pull back, you interlaced your fingers together. 
  • A look of awe decorated both of your faces.
  • “Thank you…Saeran.” The light of the TV bounced off your wet eyes, making them look extra glossy.
  • The boy just looked at you, wide eyed, apprehensive for a moment, then nodded and tightened his grip on your hand. It wasn’t the same anger induced bear trap grip from when he grabbed them before. Now it was just firm, reassuring, like a hug.
  • “MC…things will get better for you. If not? I’ll make them.” He gave a subtle squeeze of the hand, giving you the nostalgic feeling of a pinky promise.
  • “You already did.” You let your head, heavy from spinning and sobbing all day, fall on his shoulder.
  • He just looked at you for a moment, before taking a deep breath a pulling you closer, his free hand rubbing your back gently. 
  • Maybe he was wrong
  • Maybe things would get better for him too

Can I just, talk about this scene here real quick?

yeah this one. Where lance is about to get fucking shot by Sven. 

Like, before either Lance or Sven could even blink properly like, Keith just comes in and slices that gun right the fuck off so fast you can’t even see his blade.

Not only is this a bad ass moment for Keith (we even get the slow-mo and different angles of the hit as well) it also kind of shows us how Keith will cut a bitch if someone is about to hurt his lance friends. 

I mean his sword came out of literally nowhere and cut off a part of the guy’s gun so fast and so cleanly too. Like, that’s not a sloppy cut at all. It was clean and it was fast. He was going in with the intent to Kill with that kind of cut.

 And what does it show us about Keith? Well, it shows us that Keith will not let anyone hurt his friends and that he does care about Lance’s well being. (Which in turn, is great development coming from his new role as the team leader and considering Lance is his right hand man) 

Cause let’s face it, Keith is hotheaded,  he views himself as a loner, not typically a team-working kind of person. So for Keith, this is pretty new. 

This scene is especially interesting because Lance, our dear precious boy Lance, is the sharpshooter of the team. He knows how to fire a gun and he knows how to doge from a shot. 

When he’s on the battlefield, he’s cautious and analytical, so in turn, that makes him very aware of his position (and even more aware of how risky it is). He has to know how to dodge from a shot. 

(Some images of Lance being a cautious boy)

 And Lance is a damn good shot too. He never misses. The only time he does is if his opponent is too fast for him. 

(Cue acxa dodging all of his shots because of her speed and obvious experience in combat) 

And it’s safe to say that the team knows this. So then why did Keith go in for the kill like he did here? (Because let me tell you honey, that was not a warning cut, he was going in fast and hard and he was determined to cut. that. bitch)

Was it because it was just an instinct for Kieth to go and save Lance??

Just like he did here?(Keith looks absolutely fucking pissed)

 Was it because he saw the immediate danger and gauged Lance’s reaction time to be too slow? 

I mean cause look at him. He was barely getting up to face Sven when Keith fucking came over here and cut his fucking gun.

Like??


They’ve come so far from the first season, where Keith and Lance could barely even protect each other properly and now they’re saving each other’s asses like it was nothing.

In conclusion, they’ve become a lot more in sync and have become prone to save each other at the drop of a hat,

 in the span of only seven episodes.

Bonus, Lance saving Keith:

mcartist  asked:

Since it's Valentine's Day.(Have the RFA+V+Searan) I would love to ask if you could do MC and her brother spending Valentines together. The others couldn't spend time cause they were busy. So once they have some time to spare them look for you and see you are your brother hanging out. Yet you are siblings so you sorta close to each other and some things seem romantic. The others don't know you have a brother. So how would they react? If you can't do it, it's okay. Happy Valentine's Day!

OOooh scandalous~ 
(It’s the day after Valentine’s Day here because I live in Australia and we live in the future but I’d be happy do do this!)

Yoosung: 

✮ he was busy with some huge LOLOL event that was happening for valentine’s 
✮ he felt bad but you assured him that it was fine and you would just go see family or a friend or whatever 
✮ so when he leaves the house to get food and sees you with some guy??
✮ YANDERE YOOSUNG UNLEASHED 
✮ your brother was teasing you by pulling and twisting your hair 
✮ but to yoosung it looked like he was hella flirting 
✮ basically stomps up and flicks your brother’s hand away 
✮ ‘excuse me, why are you touching my girlfriend? huh?’ 
where did this confidence come from hmmmm
✮ your brother is confused because ‘omg is this the innocent yoosung MC was talking about???’
✮ you’re trying not to fall over from laughing 
✮ your brother looks absolutely horrified 
✮ “MC is mY siStEr! who are you, huh punk?’ 
✮ yoosung.exe has stopped working
✮ almost cries
✮ apologises 38918475 times he feels so bad 
✮ is pouting for the rest of the day and puts the LOLOL event on the back burner 

Jaehee: 

✎ she told you beforehand that valentine’s was going to be probably the busiest day for the cafe 
✎ but W O W 
✎ the cafe was packed and you hardly got to see jaehee 
✎ and your brother visited during your lunch break 
✎ so you two were just standing in a corner, trying to leave as much room for the actual customers that you could 
✎ things died down for a total of maybe five minutes 
✎ and jaehee looked around to find you and saw your brother squishing your cheeks together while you both laughed 
✎ she really wanted to go over there and judo kick someone’s ass but she still had customers 
✎ she was kinda angry for the rest of the day 
✎ until afterwards you walk up with your brother and introduce them 
✎ her face is redder than saeyoung’s hair 
✎ she refuses to admit anything 
✎ except when you’re back home she’s super affectionate 
✎ and at first you think it’s just valentine’s day love 
✎ but she’s super clingy and kind sheepish 
✎ so you ask what the deal is 
✎ and she begrudgingly admits that she saw you and your brother when you were messing around and didn’t realise it was your brother
✎ you have to try and maintain the giggles because she’s obviously embarrassed
✎ cute baehee 

Zen:

✿ he was really busy rehearsing an upcoming musical 
✿ and the director was super strict and wasn’t letting anyone out for the day 
✿ during one of the breaks he picked up his phone and noticed that his fans were all tagging him in the same thing
✿ and he went to it and it’s a picture of you with some guy?!?!?!?!
✿ and he’s so scandalised 
✿ he immediately goes to the group chat and sees that you and saeyoung are online
✿ he basically spams the picture with multiple exclamations akin to ‘WTF MC’ 
✿ you’re freaking out because he’s just sending mindless messages now and won’t stop to listen 
✿ and saeyoung is just off his chair laughing because he obviously knows who it is (background check) 
✿ you send a selfie of you and your brother both with a ‘wtf’ face and the ‘boi’ hand at the camera 
✿ and zen finally stops 
✿ you send another picture but this one’s of you and your brother when you were babies 
✿ ‘hyun, this is my brother’ 
✿ ‘nice to meet THE zen’
✿ he’s so flustered 
✿ he sends sorry to the chat so many times that the original problem can’t even be found 
✿ when he comes home that night he brings a big bouquet of flowers and your favourite snacks 
✿ is super clingy 

Jumin: 

₩ this nugget just doesn’t believe in valentine’s day 
₩ you’d told him how annoyed this makes you but he didn’t seem to care too much 
₩ so he was at work 
₩ you went to lunch at the cafe thing across from the C&R building because your brother was curious 
₩ y’all were just chilling, eating pastries and drinking milkshakes 
₩ and then jaehee came for her lunch break 
plot twist
₩ you say hi and your brother introduces himself (but not as your brother) 
₩ and she’s shook 
₩ she goes back and asks jumin if he knew you were at the cafe with some guy
₩ JUMIN IS JUST AS SHOOK 
₩ he glides down and stands at your table 
₩ you really nonchalantly say hello 
₩ he’s so confused 
₩ ‘would you like to explain yourself MC?’ 
₩ ???? ‘jumin what are you talking about? i’m just having lunch with my brother, we’re waiting for his girlfriend to come’ 
₩ it’s like you can see him deflate in embarrassment 
₩ he like flops down in the seat next to you 
₩ meets your brother 
₩ when you’re back at home you ask him why he was so salty at the start and he admitted that he thought you were on a date with some random guy because he wouldn’t celebrate valentine’s 
₩ you laugh and say you wouldn’t do that and shower him in affection
he made up for it ;)

Seven/Saeyoung:

⌨  he probably knows what your brother looks like from the background check but for the sake of story let’s just pretend he didn’t go that deep into your history 
⌨  he was super busy with work-related stuff and didn’t even realise it was valentine’s
⌨  he asked you to grab some groceries because he couldn’t
⌨  he’d noticed you’d been gone for a while so he hacked into the security cameras of and around the grocery store
⌨  saw you talking to some guy
⌨  he’s so confused because you haven’t just stopped for a little ‘oh hi I know you’ obligatory hello but you’re walking down the sidewalk with the store bags and talking
⌨  he sees him nudge you with his shoulder and he’s kinda pissed
⌨  he just waits until you’re back home. you’re alone 
⌨  he tries to act nonchalant about it, and like he doesn’t know anything– waiting until you bring it up 
⌨  it’s the end of the day and he crawls into the bed where you already are 
⌨  you bring up how it’s valentine’s day and that you missed him 
⌨  he feels guilty but he’s kinda frustrated from before and goes ‘it didn’t look like you missed me too much while walking down the street with some other guy’ 
⌨  he did not get the reaction he expected 
⌨  he expected you to be kinda shocked like ‘:o caught’ 
⌨  but you’re giggling and snorting 
⌨  ‘saeyoung… that was my brother; we ran into each other outside a store so he walked with me for a little while’ 
⌨  like jumin, he deflates 
⌨  he feels S O  B A D 
⌨  he gives you so many cuddles and just fully wraps himself around you 
⌨  swears he’ll make it up to you 
⌨  he definitely does 


I hope you all had a happy valentine’s day! CHEAP CHOCOLATE AND MYSTIC MESSENGER DLC’S WOOO ♡♡♡♡

pre-zimbits, in which bittle is drunk and jack is very patient (and a jerk with a great ass)

“I can’t believe I didn’t stay for Senior Week last year.”

Bittle was sprawled across the grass in the little cemetery on the other side of the soccer field. Jack wasn’t entirely sure how he got here, but he was very drunk and very alone, and everyone else was very drunk and not answering Bittle’s texts.

“Having fun?” Jack asked, hands in his pockets.

Bittle pulled himself to his feet, using a headstone for balance. “Mmph, sorry there, Mr. Dead Dude. Don’t haunt me for this.”

Bittle was drunker than Jack feared. He stumbled over, eyes glassy and unfocused. There was no doubt Jack would be cleaning vomit tonight; Bittle was so buying him Annie’s tomorrow.

Keep reading

  • Me: *sigh*
  • Cashier: What's wrong?
  • Me: It's the scent of this place. It's nostalgic. Reminds me of lavender scent of my grandmother's house. Even color of the walls remind me of the bygone era of my childhood; the dim sunsets of a fuzzy summer evenings, and faint memory of fading dreams.
  • Cashier: Ah, you want to start all over do you? I know the feeling. It's enough to drive me to the brink.
  • Me: Verily. At some point, I began to live my life in retrospect. The now doesn't matter anymore because everything has become so bland. What am I to do in this monotonous life when my happy times passed so long ago. It's as if-
  • Cashier: *turns into a 9 foot tall vibrating metal cube that deconstructs me at a molecular level and turns me into pure radium powder*
  • Guy, with that as fetish who actually wrote this post: *doesn't even jack it just looks at the screen all sweaty and breathing heavily*
  • Girlfriend: *walks into the room unannounced* Everything okay? You've been acting kind of strange recently.
  • Guy: *quickly closes all tabs* Oh, nothing. I'm just like. I'm... you know. I've been tired.
  • Girlfriend: *suspiciously* ...sure. Pizza's here by the way.
  • Guy: Okay, cool. I'll be right out. *wipes sweat from head*
  • Girlfriend: *texts best friend* He's definitely cheating. He just closed like twenty tabs on his computer!!!!!!!
  • Best Friend: Did you look through his browsing history?
  • Girlfriend: Yeah, it's all wikipedia pages about radioactive stuff. It's so fucking weird. He's either cheating or a terrorist.
  • Best Friend: That's creepy. I'd break up with him.
  • Girlfriend: I've been considering it, but it's complicated. I still feel so strongly about him. I don't want to ruin our relationship.
  • Best Friend: Sometimes you have to break things off with the people you care about the most. For a little bit anyway.
  • Girlfriend: Yeah, I get that. It's so hard though. I can't imagine life without him.
  • Best Friend: You have to do what you have to do. It's the only way to move forward. Getting stuck in a stagnant relationship can ruin you.
  • Girlfriend: I guess you're right...
  • Best Friend: *is wearing a full hazmat suit.*
  • Doctor: *walks up behind her* Jennifer, stop texting. We need you in the bottom.
  • Best Friend: Sorry, got it.
  • Best Friend: *descends in elevator, sees 9 foot tall humanoid ant corpse on the ground* Fucking gross! Do you know where it came from.
  • Doctor: No clue. It's why we called you here.
  • Best Friend: This isn't like any cryptid I've ever seen. It must be extraterrestrial in origin. Wait... is its body full of gummy worms? *hears the sound of the elevator going up behind her*
  • Best Friend: Doctor! Where are you going!? What the fuck!?
  • Doctor: Waves to her from the elevator.
  • Ant Humanoids: *appear from the shadows in the hundreds*
  • Best Friend: No, no, no, no! This can't be happening.
  • Ant Humanoids: *surround her*
  • Best Friend: Don't fucking come near me! I'm highly radioactive! You'll all die if you eat me.
  • Ant Humanoid in the back: *listening to comic book podcast*
  • Podcast Guy 1: So when it comes to Superman, I feel like there are actually two characters. Clark Kent, the man. Then there's Superman, the ideal. They're the same person but represent very different aspects of him.
  • Podcast Guy 2: Comic books are fucking stupid, my dude. *cellphone buzzes* Hold up, I gotta take this.
  • Podcast Guy 2: *gets an alert that his favorite fetish forum has updated, licks lips fuckingly*
  • Podcast Guy 2: *under breath* Oh yeah. A new radium dust sexual fanfic. Can't wait to tweak my noodle to this! Zoo wee mama!
  • Podcast Guy 1: What did you just say.
  • Podcast Guy 2: Nothing, man. We were talking about Superman. Let's continue with that.
  • Podcast Guy 1: Yeah, as I was saying. Superman would definitely be a power bottom and