i don't know what type of cats

A quick lesson in Zaynglish

Put on your Eliza Doolittle hats, I’m about to teach you some Zaynglish.

To really grasp Zaynglish, to really become one with Zehn, you must master the art of knowing when to throw down some random “h”’s. The “h” is your Major Key™.  Just throw that shit down like a vowel and don’t even worry about it: 

“Ahm in ah coohl bohybend”

“Muh mum bought meh deese boxehs”

Sometimes you’ll need to make the judgement call to use “u” instead of “a” or “o”. You’ll know what to do.  Just put on some serums, listen to some Drake, find yourself some cat memes, and don’t overthink it:

“Weh’re  yuhng bohys  ahnd we’re ahl guhnna beh cryhin’

“Tehke dem ahff sloah, broh”

“Dis is guhnna beh big tyhme yoh”

“Ah’ll treh buht ah’ll miss yew tuh mooch Leeyum!!”

 And now you should be a Zaynglish master. You’re welcome.

anonymous asked:

I'm a waitress, and was bending over slightly to clear a table, because how else am I supposed to do it, and this guy, must have been in his 60s (I'm 19), leant over behind me, and whispered "fuck me" in my ear, before just turning away and walking out. like, what the fuck! I didn't know how to react, and by the time my senses returned, he was gone. I'm not sure if this is a fuck customers, or fuck creepy old guys but just because I have to smile and serve ya don't mean you can say creepy shit!

You were working and he was a customer so it definitely counts. This is probably like about 40%, if not more, of the type of submission we get here. A large part of it is cat calling is a thing but adding on top of that the mentality that a customer is allowed to say or do anything to an employee exists and it’s a seriously bad combination. I really think that more businesses need to have a zero tolerance policy for customer sexual harassment because a lot of that can lead to dangerous situations like stalking, which we have heard of on here a few times. In general businesses need to put their foot down altogether, but I feel like a manager is more likely to kick someone out for throwing product or punching you than they are for something like this because a vast majority of people think this is flattering. It’s not. It isn’t harmless either because a lot of women that are harassed in this way have PTSD from being attacked by someone who would do something like this. It isn’t “just words” then. I want to hunt him down and replace the old fucker’s viagra with something that’ll make him lactate instead. -Abby

anonymous asked:

one time i saw this post where an anonymous user said "why are there no healthy intjs" and the other person answered "sf types don't listen to them wah wah wah its society's fault" and not gonna lie i was a little triggered bc im an isfp and i consider myself to be a very good listener and very understanding. why do you think it's acceptable in the mbti community for people to just bash on sensors all the time? it's ok if you don't want to answer, i just wanted your opinion bc ur not annoying

Hello! Unfortunately in the MBTI community there’s this thing called “intuitive bias”, where everyone seems to think intuitives are inherently more cool and interesting and ~different~ than sensors D: . I really don’t know where that stereotype came from but it’s not true in the slightest! It kind of reminds me of all those posts about ~introverts~ that say that all introverts: love reading, hate small talk, love cats, hate parties, hate the outdoors ect. And yeah, sf types tend to be very understanding and great listeners :)! Don’t listen to them ♡!

Honestly that post kinda sounds like a bunch of INTJs whining and blaming it on SF types for absolutely no reason to make themselves feel better . And what did the anon even mean by “no healthy intjs”? None in the universe??? 

N̖͙͍̩ ̠̥̭̰̲̘̙͡Ę̬͍̟̭̺̭ ̻̺̭̗͓͉̀W͘ ̵̣ C̹̕ ͅR̠̞̯͈̘̫̱ ͚̞̺͇̘͓̫Y̸̗͖͉̩ͅ ̲͠P̩͓̪ ̀T̘̥̤̖̥̗̜ ̷̦̗͓̞̞͍̠I͇͓͔̥̞ ̨̠͖̯̙D

This ancient photo was taken in the early 1700′s

Could it be…

Okay, someone who knows cats better…. Is she just trying to make bed more comfy? The kneading part is familiar. The biting bit is what’s confusing me. I know my old dog used to do this to arrange blankets and beds to her liking but I’ve never seen a cat do it! She’s so mouthy and it’s WEIRD.

Hesitant Alien
  • The Bureau: This song feels like sitting in a dingy bar with your third drink when your favourite song comes on
  • Action Cat: A really happy upbeat song that's actually about insecurity
  • No Shows: Gerard Way is my type of metal tbh
  • Brother: It must be rly nice to be Mikey Way and have people constantly writing songs about you
  • Millions: Screaming + sick riff + what the fuck is he saying
  • Zero Zero: k shits gettin intense now + i still don't know what the fuck he's saying
  • Juarez: Ok so who's gonna pay for Gerard's swimming lessons?????
  • Drugstore Perfume: this song feels like being high
  • Get The Gang Together: so cool I had to turn the heat up
  • How It's Going To Be: Sounds like it should be the end of the album but its not which is v v confusing. + "And you said we’d all be dead by twenty-five" just rip my heart out why don't you???????
  • Maya The Psychic: ((((((low-key rebellion vibes))))))
after reading a political article
  • INFP: *rants*
  • INFJ: *types*
  • INFP: AND ANOTHER THING *continues talking, bring up a dozen different arguments*
  • INFJ: *eyes stay focused on the computer. types steadily*
  • INFP: *breaks off mid-sentence* But I don't know...what do you think?
  • INFJ: *types; doesn't respond*
  • INFP: Oh. You are doing your (Ni-Ti) thing. I'm distracting you. Sorry. *picks up cat and leaves room*

anonymous asked:

I don't know if you got this or it's still sending What type of Punishments would the RFA use on MC? (Teasing,humiliation,spanking)

yeah i got this !!! sorry its taking me a while to answer these asks !!!!

-if daddy mode is on he’s gonna use a gag do not

-the red ribbon ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
-and maybe some other bdsm things,,,,

Zen: -omg this man
-will probably just tug on your hair or make you ride him???
-WILL make you ride his face

-handcuffs omg all the way
-she likes the way they clink together when you move around too much

-cat bdsm shit
-spanking omg
-will tie your wrists together do not test him
Random But Mostly Weird Sentence Starters
  • "Oh, yeah, 'cause /that/ will work!"
  • "Well, you don't see me going around drawing butts and penises on everything, do you?"
  • "Okay, yeah, I know, I've done some terrible, terrible things--but that was last week! I'm a new guy/gal/person!"
  • "Which was it... necrophilia or narcolepsy? I always get those two confused..."
  • "Halfsies? No. Wholesies."
  • "Come on! You know you can't avoid me forever. I'm like the draft!"
  • "I'm sorry, what was that? I don't speak stupid."
  • "WHY would you DO that?!"
  • "Dear God, please save me from the wickedness that is _______ fans. Amen."
  • "Sometimes I wish I was a cat so I could sit around and not have any expectations thrust upon me but then I remember I'd have to lick my own butt and I don't want to be a cat any more."
  • "I feel like we're a bunch of monkeys trying to type a coherent sentence at the same typewriter."
  • "It's not funny--I stepped on a lego--do not mock my pain."
  • "I fear your wrath the same way I fear the wrath of ten thousand angry boy band fans... Which is to say, a lot."
  • "I swear on all that is good and holy, if you don't do the thing I will pee on everything you love."
  • "You look like you got into a fight with a blender and lost."
  • "Well, we were enemies once, but then we punched each other a couple of times and went out for drinks and we're best friends now."
fic: Appearances Can Be Deceiving

Eren finds Levi’s tumblr and is more than a little confused by contrast between the man he knows in real life and his online persona.

Based off of this tumblr post

me irl: speaks in a fairly monotone voice, doesnt smile a lot, literally gets told i seem dead inside

me online: uses double exclamations points!!  says things like omg and aah and oooooooooooooh a lot.  screams at cute pictures of cats

[also on AO3] words: 3.5Kish rating:T+

Eren may or may not have a huge crush on his maths tutor.

Yep, that’s right, the twenty-two year old, five-foot-three, perpetually impassive man who somehow made trigonometric calculus sexy. The teenager spent most of his time wondering why on earth each tutoring session couldn’t turn out at least a little bit more like a porno. Instead he simply had to sit there and attempt to pay attention to the explanations the guy was giving rather than the entrancing way his mouth moved.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

HYPEHYPEHYPE I've been a fire type since gen 1 and I don't know if coconut owl will ruin me. The evolutions will decide... like, all rowlet has is (EXTREME) cuteness but what if it evolves into Sir Owl Branket? And Litten is cute and cool and a FIRE TYPE! And what did you think about the "tribal" feel of Alula? In need of ideas to fill my heart :o SEND HELP MISS OMMANYTE WE STILL KNOW SO LITTLE