i don't know what my face was doing today but i don't even care

Basically, This is Basically What Every Dr. Phil Episode is Basically Like Basically
  • Dr. Phil: Hello, I am Doctor Philip, and today we'll be tackling an issue that is very widespread, but rarely spoken about. Gaming addiction. Now, I know many of you know at least one person in your life who plays video games, whether that be a child or, in some cases, a spouse.
  • Audience: *laughs*
  • Dr. Phil: But, when unregulated, gaming can lead to serious addiction. Today I have with me a mother who's home life has been torn apart as her very own son descended into gaming addiction.
  • Mother: *sniffing and wiping tears away* Hello, doctor. Will you cure my son?
  • Dr. Phil: Well, dear, that's... uhh. Let's just bring the boy out already.
  • *dramatic music plays*
  • Gamer: My name is Gregg, I'm 19 years old, I'm a gaming addict, and I don't give a f*ck.
  • Audience: *gasps*
  • Gamer: Yeah, I game for 19 to 20 hours a day and the other four hours I use for looking up sick gaming strats or beating it to anime porn. I once sucked off a dude because he offered me minecraft diamonds. I don't give a sh*t, I would've sucked him off even if he didn't have the diamonds.
  • Audience: *gasps louder*
  • Gamer: Do I hate women? Yes, I hate women. I've emailed Anita Sarkeesian my address. She knows where I am if she wants to fight me. Feminists, square the fuck up. People always ask why I don't do anything other than gaming. I ask them why don't they mind their own f*cking business. I don't think I have a problem. Dr. Phil can honestly eat my whole an*s.
  • Gamer: *walks out onto the stage*
  • Audience: *boos*
  • Gamer: F*ck all y'all! I don't give a f*ck! *flips off the audience*
  • Dr. Phil: Please take a seat, son.
  • Gamer: *sits very disrespectfully*
  • Mother: *starts bawling*
  • Dr. Phil: Son, do you think that was acceptable behavior?
  • Gamer: The only behavior I care about is the behavioral patterns for enemies in the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. series. I love video games: Master chief, Mario, uhm, Blinx the Cat... Blasto. Love those guys!
  • Audience: *boos*
  • Gamer: I don't care! You think I care! F*ck all y'all!
  • Dr. Phil: All these people are booing you, doesn't that make you feel bad?
  • Gamer: Are you deaf? Have I not articulated the fact that I absolutely 100% do not care about anything except for video games? I. DON'T. GIVE. A. F*CK.
  • Mother: He's always like this, there's no changing him. It didn't used to be this way... just *starts bawling harder*
  • Dr. Phil: I think there is a way to change him, and we'll find out more about that after these messages.
  • *Dr. Phil theme plays*
  • *The lights dim and every goes empty eyed and slack-jawed*
  • Gamer: Heh, this is weird. *nudges mom and whispers to her* Hey, we're getting paid for this, right. Hey, mom? ...Mom?
  • Mother: *completely unresponsive*
  • Dr. Phil: *completely unresponsive*
  • Audience: *completely unresponsive*
  • Gamer: Heh... this is REALLY weird. *looks around nervously*
  • Audience member: Hey!
  • Gamer: Huh?
  • Audience Member: I'm in the audience! Over here! My arms are strapped to the chair! You have to help me!
  • Gamer: *runs to the audience member*
  • Audience Member: Thank god, I thought I was the only one here left with any brains.
  • Gamer: *hastily undoing the straps* What the fuck is going on?
  • Audience Member: I don't know, but this definitely isn't Dr. Phil's show.
  • Gamer: Then what is it?
  • Audience Member: No clue, but we have to get out of here before the commercial breaks ends.
  • Gamer: *successfully undoes the straps*
  • Audience Member: C'mon! Let's go. *grabs the gamer by the arm*
  • Gamer: *resists* Wait a fucking minute. Why am I supposed to trust you?
  • Audience Member: Because I'm normal and everyone else is braindead if you haven't noticed.
  • Gamer: Yeah, but I'm not going anywhere until I know what's going on. Being on Dr. Phil is a huge opportunity for me to, y'know, advertise my brand. I'm a gamer if you haven't noticed.
  • Audience Member: Are you insane? Have you had a look around you? Does this anything happening right now seem normal to you? Who cares about your "brand". Do you even remember how you got here?
  • Gamer: Well... now that you mention, I can't really remember exactly.
  • Audience Member: Yeah, now let's get the fuck out of here.
  • *the gamer and audience member run through the back exit into the hallways*
  • *the Dr. Phil theme blares as the show returns from commercial break*
  • Gamer: My ears!
  • Audience Member: Move it! *jerks gamer's arm*
  • Gamer: Okay, calm down.
  • *the entire audience screams in unison*
  • Gamer: What the fuck is that!?
  • Audience Member: It's the reason we're running! Quick, in here!
  • *the duo duck into a cramped broom closest*
  • Gamer: Listen, you have to tell me what the fuck is going on right now!
  • Audience Member: Shh.
  • Gamer: Don't shush me!
  • Audience Member: *covers the gamer's mouth*
  • *agonized screaming and violently rumbling passes by the broom closest*
  • Gamer: Holy shit!
  • Audience Member: Stop yelling.
  • Gamer: How can I not yell when it sounds the gates of hell just passed by us!
  • Audience Member: You want it to turn back around and find us?
  • Gamer: Alright. I'll calm down... I'll. *start sobbing*
  • Audience Member: Please, please stop crying. You're too loud.
  • Gamer: I can't! I'm under a lot of stress!
  • Audience Member: You'll be dead if you don't shut the fuck.
  • Gamer: I never wanted any of this, I just wanted to go on Dr. Phil so people would recognize me on YouTube and I could become a popular Let's Player!
  • Audience Member: If you don't shut up right now, I'll-
  • *a snake bites the audience member's neck*
  • Audience Member: *eyes roll up*
  • Gamer: *screams like a baby*
  • *snakes slither under the closet door*
  • Gamer: *stumbles out of the closet and falls into hallway covered with snakes* Fuck me! Fuck me!
  • Gamer: *attempts to run away but falls beneath the snakes and into and empty void*
  • *agonized screaming echoes from all around*
  • Gamer: Am I in hell? I have to be in hell. You don't fall through a pool of snakes and wind up anywhere else but hell.
  • Dr. Phil: THERE IS NO HELL.
  • Gamer: Doc, is that you? If this isn't hell then where am I?
  • Dr. Phil: YOU'RE IN MY REALM SON. *Dr. Phil's face appears glowing in the distance, his eyes are empty sockets and his mouth hangs open*
  • Gamer: What the fuck are you?
  • Dr. Phil: I'M DOCTOR PHILIP.
  • Gamer: You're not Dr. Phil!
  • Dr. Phil: I NEVER SAID I WAS, SON. *a wall of gray human bodies lights up surrounding Dr. Phil's massive head, dr. phil's giant snake body slithers towards the gamer and opens its third eye* I'M DOCTOR PHILIP.
  • *the wall of bodies screams in unison as Dr. Phil devours the gamer*
  • *Dr. Phil theme plays loudly*
  • Dr. Phil: THE NEXT EPISODE IS STARTING. I'M LATE. *slithers into the wall of bodies and his snake body slowly transforms into a normal Dr. Phil's body*
  • Dr. Phil: *crawls onto the stage*
  • Dr. Phil: *dusts himself off* Woo, I went on quite an adventure.
  • Audience: *laughs*
  • Dr. Phil: I'm glad we can all find some time in our lives to laugh, but today's episode is covering something that is most certainly not a laughing matter. It's one of the most serious addictions striking America today and it's rarely talked about. I'm talking about people who love to pee on their mattresses and then pay people exorbitant amounts of money to suck their disgusting mattresses clean.
  • Audience: ... *someone clears their throat*
  • Dr. Phil: What's the matter?
  • Cameraguy: Spsss, Doc. That's not what the episode is about. It's about people with terrible gambling issues.
  • Dr. Phil: Oh, ah, fuck! Cut to commercial!
  • Me: having a structured life is exhausting!
  • Therapist: I understand. Let's say just get up in the morning, get some breakfast, go for a walk...and that's it for a start.
  • Me: *internally: sounds reasonable, but that means first fighting against my will to just stay in bed and act as if I'm not existing. Getting up either way and facing my face and body in the mirror. There's an 80% chance that it's one of those days and I hate myself just so fucking much I could scream. But there's also a chance I look in the mirror and find a person that does not seem to be familiar to me looking back at me. Still, now you want me to shower and wash this body I find really disgusting. I have to see every single scar I have and maybe feel the burn of fresh cuts. Then I have to put on cloth, brush my teeth and my hair and do my makeup, as I can't go outside without hiding my ugly face under layers of primers and foundations and powders and highlighters and fake lashes and a perfect contour and a big nude fake smile. I spend money I don't have to make myself look good enough for myself to endure my own appearance. I remember to take my meds. Now I'm dressed (in clothes that hopefully say 'i don't care' when really I care a lot) and can go to the kitchen to prepare food that I know I won't be able to eat in 50% of the cases. There's also a good chance that I eat it and then find myself throwing up and ruining my makeup feeling every single disgusting cell of fat on my body vibrate while trying to breathe. Well either way let's say I might redo my make-up, brush my teeth again and step outside. I maybe take my horse with me and walk through the neighbourhood. I have to see people. I feel anxious. I would love to just turn around and go back home. But I keep on walking, trying to seem selfconfident so my horse and neighbours can't see or feel my insecurity. I'll try to be friendly and act normal even though I'm sure they hate me and laugh about me. Still if the communication between my horse and me isn't perfect today I'll probably cry and if a neighbour just looks at me in a way that i interpret to be unfriendly or cold or annoyed I'll probably cry too. Let's say I'm back home. Now it's like 11 in the morning. What do I do? By now I'm an emotional wreck, tired as hell, probably planing on how to harm myself with one half of my brain while the other half bundles it's last energy to prevent exactly this from happening. How do I survive the rest?*
  • Me: I'll try.
Shit People Say After You Tell Them Your Sign
  • *actual events by actual people
  • Aries: "Damn that explains your muscles"
  • "No wonder you have a temper hahahhhaa ok don't hit me"
  • "But you don't like sports????"
  • Taurus: "Okay nice so are you hungry now?"
  • "But you can't even decide what shoes to wear today wut"
  • "but you're always too lazy to argue COME ON FIGHT ME"
  • Gemini: "Lmao you two-faced hoe what did I tell you"
  • "Okay but if like you have a pair of gemini twins...would they both have one face each or four"
  • "You're loyal for one OR ARE YOU hmmmmm"
  • Cancer: "I've never seen you cry though"
  • "Stay away from me I might get cancer"
  • Leo: "YOUR HAIR IS WOW NO WONDER"
  • "You're not even selfish thoughhhhh"
  • "That's why you a thot"
  • Virgo: "But you never study wut"
  • "You don't even clean your room this is a lie"
  • "So are you a eternally a virgin or"
  • Libra: "This is why you can't decide on what to eat. Like, ever."
  • "What happens if two libras go on a date omfg how to you choose where to go fuck this is giving ME a headache"
  • "I don't care if you flirt with everyone don't steal my gurl fam"
  • Scorpio: "But you're so nice"
  • "Is this why you're always dressed like you're going to a funeral ahaaa- okay sorry"
  • "That explains your horrifying tweet damn"
  • Sagittarius: "Stop liking every girl you meet man you're more of a hoe than libra"
  • "But you're scared of heights"
  • "But you don't even go out of your room what do you mean adventure is this a sick joke"
  • Capricorn: "But you is the biggest party peep I know"
  • "no wonder you do so well without studying fuck you"
  • "is this why you never find dates"
  • Aquarius: "....so what does your sign do"
  • "Aren't you basically Sagittarius? What's the difference"
  • "...okay nice"
  • Pisces: "isn't that why you're so adorable awwwWWW"
  • "so are you and cancer like. TItanic buddies"
  • "Wow all my pisces friends are art people how are you good at science"

anonymous asked:

k, so, i don't mind the ship, i just want a human au where they don't know eachother 'till one crash the other's car and they go like "calm down, we don't even know whos fault was" "my car was parked" "okay, maybe we have a hint, but still"

I chose Logince, because honestly I really could see them having that conversation. Hope you like it!


Logan was not in the mood to deal with this. It had already been a long day. He’d accidentally slept though his alarm this morning, had spilled coffee on his shirt, and his students had turned in their essays today, so he had piles of grading to do when he got home. And now there was this.

He stared balefully at his car, the rear of which was sporting a rather large dent, in the hopes that if he stared at it long enough, it might turn out to be a stress-induced hallucination. Sadly, he was not that lucky.

“Well this is unfortunate,” an arrogant voice was saying from behind him. “I just got my paint job redone.”

Logan twitched.

“Unfortunate.” he hissed, hands beginning to ball at his sides. “Oh, yes I’m sure it is indeed very unfortunate for you. It will undoubtedly be even more unfortunate when you have to pay for the damage to my car.”

“Calm down,” the other man said, now sounding a bit nervous. “We don’t even know whose fault it is.”

“My car was parked,” Logan pointed out tersely.

“Okay, so maybe we have a hint, but still” the other conceded, one hand going to rub at his hair.

He then sighed, and offered his hand. “We seem to have gotten off to a bad start. My name is Roman.”

Logan stared at the hand, but didn’t take it. “Logan Sanders,” he said coldly. “Now if you would please give me your insurance information.”

Roman frowned, drawing back his hand. “You don’t have to be rude,” he complained. “It really was an accident.”

Logan could feel his pulse rate begin to rise. “I don’t care if was an accident” he snapped. “What I care about is that it happened. What I care about is the time this whole thing has wasted. What I care about is getting my car fixed!”

Logan closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down. He was getting too worked up. He pinched the bridge of his nose. He hated midterms. They inevitably brought far too much stress for both him and his students.

A hand touched his shoulder. He glanced up to see Roman looking at him with concern.

“Hey,” he said, his tone softer now, having lost some of its earlier arrogance. “Look, I really am sorry. I’ll get my insurance information, don’t worry about it. And maybe I can make up to you with dinner?”

Logan stared. “You crash into my car, and now you want to take me on a date?” he said dryly, sure that this was some kind of joke.

Roman shrugged, seemingly unaffected by Logan’s skepticism. “You clearly need it, I feel slightly guilty, and you’re cute so it’s not like it’s a hardship” The last part of his sentence was accompanied by a wink.

Logan almost said no automatically, but then stopped to consider the situation. While Roman didn’t seem like his type, he really could use a good meal. He’d been so busy lately, that he hadn’t had time to go grocery shopping, so there wasn’t much less at home. And the other did owe him.

He sighed. “I accept your offer of dinner,” he said, then hurried to add, “although not as a romantic outing. Generally I prefer my dates to be a little less irritating.”

Roman laughed. “I guess I’ll just have to win you over,” he said, a teasing smile on his face. “But do you like Italian? There’s a fantastic little place just ten minutes away.”

Ignoring the first part of Roman’s statement, Logan nodded. “Italian is acceptable,” he said.

“Great,” Roman replied, clapping his hands together. “Now, it doesn’t look like I’ve done too much damage to either car, so you should be able to follow me. I’ll meet you at the restaurant.”

“Fine,” Logan said, getting out his keys. He hoped this place would be good.

Roman had been right, the place was close. Logan let his eyes drift around as they walked through the door. It was fairly small, but it looked clean, and it held a decent crowd.

“Hey Prince Charming,” a voice drawled, “I didn’t know you had a date tonight.”

Logan turned to see a young man dressed in all in black with an apron tied around his waist. He clearly knew Roman well.

Roman smiled, a bit sheepish. “Ah well, it’s not exactly a date, Anx” he said, glancing over at Logan.

Logan stepped in. “He crashed into my car,” he said simply. “This is to help make it up to me.”

The other man, Anx, snorted. “Of course you did” he said, amusement clear in his voice. “Well come on, I’ll get you a table.”

Once they were seated, Logan remarked. “You seem to know the staff here well,”

“Anx was my roommate in college,” Roman explained. “We hated each other at first, but eventually we became friends. Mostly thanks to Patton dragging the two of us out and forcing us to bond. Patton’s the cook here.”

Logan nodded, taking this all in. “Why did you hate each other?” he asked curiously.

Roman chuckled and then launched into a story that sounded oddly reminiscent of Wicked, well the bits not involving witches and flying monkeys anyway.

Despite his earlier dislike of the man, Logan actually ended up enjoying their conversation. Roman had a seemingly endless well of stories and a talent for telling them. He also had to admit the restaurant had been well chosen. Not only had Anx been a attentive server, but the food was superb. He would definitely be returning here.

Finishing the last few bites of his tiramisu, Roman has insisted he try it, Logan almost felt disappointed the evening had to end. This had been the most relaxed he’d felt in days. Still he had grading to do.

“I should go,” he admitted. “We can exchange insurance information and I’ll be on my way.”

He then paused, before adding,a little hesitantly. “Thank you for the meal though. It was.. quite enjoyable.”

“I’m glad,” Roman smiled at him. It was a nice smile.

Logan shook himself. Such thoughts were unnecessary.

He waited as Roman paid the check before walking out the car with him. Once Roman had finished scribbling down his information a piece of notebook paper, Logan nodded at him.

“Goodbye, Roman,” he said. “Take care not to crash into anyone else on your way home.”

Roman rolled his eyes, but didn’t seem too annoyed by the comment. “I’ll be sure to be careful,” he replied. “Although, I have to say, I can’t regret meeting you.”

Logan ducked his head, his face flushing a bit. “Goodbye,” he said again firmly, getting into his car.

Once he got home, he glanced at the information Roman had given to him. At the very top of the page was a phone number, the words call me! written next to it.

Logan let his lips curve upward in a small smile. Roman was a ridiculous man, nothing like his usual type. But perhaps he could use the change.

obliviaet  asked:

Ahhh okay okay okay!! I for one thank you for following me! I wouldn't think you would like my blog! Anyway for a Drarry prompt! I don't have an exact idea but I want amortentia DRARRY! One of them brewing in class and one comes in wondering why it smells like who. Ooh! OR OR! The classical: you messed this up! I don't smell anything! Honestly amortentia anything!

omg whatI love your blog! thank you for following me!

My Writing


“Mr. Potter! How nice of you to join us!” Slughorn said as Harry came into class late.

“Sorry Professor. I overslept,” Harry mumbled.

“Oh not to worry, my boy! We’re just brewing up some Amortentia.”

“Um…okay,” Harry said, having no idea what Amortentia is.

“Right, well, since you came in late, it seems your usual partner, Mr. Weasley, is taken. Mr. Malfoy needs a partner, though.”

Draco’s head snapped up at this.

“I think I’d rather work alone, sir.”

“Oh nonsense, boy! Go on, take your seat.”

Harry sighed and sat down in the chair next to Draco, who just rolled his eyes at him.

“Yeah, I’m not too thrilled either,” Harry muttered to himself, but loud enough for Draco to hear.

“Well can you at least be helpful?” Draco snapped.

Harry sighed and looked over at Draco’s textbook. He didn’t want to pull out his own and risk Draco seeing all the extra writing in it. Harry didn’t bother to read what the potion actually does and just skipped right down to the instructions. Draco had already started brewing it, so Harry didn’t know what point the potion was at.

“What should I do?”

“Merlin, you’re useless.”

“Well how do you expect me to just know how far you are?!”

“Well, maybe come to class on time!”

“Do you want me to help or not?”

Draco took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.

“Step four,” he bit out.

Harry grabbed the supplies and quickly began cutting up rose thorns.

“You’re not doing it right, Potter.”

“Jesus, Malfoy. It’s fine. It just has to be cut, I don’t think it really matters how.”

“It does matter,” Draco said, and then reached over to take the knife from Harry.

When he grabbed for the knife, their hands brushed together, and Harry gasped and dropped the knife at the warmth he felt from the contact. The knife clattered on the floor, and Draco glared at him before bending down to pick it up.

“Just stay out of the way,” he muttered and made quick work of cutting up the rose thorns and throwing them into the cauldron.

Harry grew bored of just watching Draco stir and add things.

“Let me do something,” he practically whined.

Draco gave him a strange look, one that wasn’t a glare, and that Harry was surprised to see.

“I’m almost done. Just let me do it,” Draco said and added the last ingredient.

“Can I at least stir it? You did all the work, I feel bad…” Harry admitted.

He was just as shocked to hear himself say that as Draco was.

“Fine.”

Draco moved out of the way and Harry mixed the potion until it turned the proper color.

“I think we’re done, Professor!” Harry called.

Slughorn came over and looked into their cauldron.

“Well done, boys! Go ahead and smell it,” he told them before walking off to check the status of a different group’s potion.

“Smell it? Why the bloody hell would I do that?”

“Do you even know what this potion is, Potter?”

“Of course I do!” Harry lied.

He didn’t fool Draco, who just rolled his eyes.

“It’s a love potion. It’s supposed to smell like what you’re attracted to, so it varies from person to person.”

At that, Harry leaned down to smell it.

“Well it doesn’t smell any different than it has the whole time we’ve been working on it.”

“Bullshit, Potter. If you had done any work, I would believe that, but I know that I didn’t mess it up.”

Draco then lightly pushed Harry to the side so he could smell it. Harry noticed the panicked look on his face after he registered the smell.

“Well? Do you smell anything?”

“I…yeah.”

“Well what is it?”

“None of your business, Potter!”

Harry then went over by Hermione and Ron, who just finished, to smell theirs, insisting that something with his own went wrong.

“What the hell! It smells exactly the same as the one I made with…Malfoy.”

The realization quickly crashed upon Harry. He slowly made his way back over to Draco.

“Was theirs brewed correctly?” Draco asked.

“Yes,” Harry said quietly and sat down, not bothering to help Draco clean up.

Draco looked at Harry for a moment, trying to meet his eyes, but Harry wouldn’t let him. He just stared down at the desk. The bell finally rung, signaling the end of class, and Harry was the first one out. Before he could get far, though, someone called his name.

“Potter!”

Harry stopped walking, and waited for him to catch up.

“What do you want, Malfoy?”

“I, um…wanted to ask if you were okay.”

“And since when do you care about my well being?”

Draco shrugged.

“You just seemed upset.”

“Yeah, well, having a bloody potion confirm the feelings that I’ve been trying to deny isn’t exactly how I planned on today going.”

The words were out of Harry’s mouth before he realized he was saying them.

“Funny, I had the same experience.”

Harry narrowed his eyes at Draco.

“What do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean. I mean the same thing as you. I smelt you in the bloody potion, Potter. And I know you smelt me, too.”

Harry blushed.

“I-I didnt-”

“Really? Then please tell me why you’re acting like this.”

Harry didn’t say anything and looked away from Draco.

“How long have you felt this way?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Harry mumbled.

“Tell me, Potter.”

Harry let out an exasperated sigh and met Draco’s grey eyes.

“I don’t know! Ages!”

“I’ve had a crush on you since first year,” Draco admitted.

Harry’s eyes widened in surprise.

“You’re joking,” Harry said, shaking his head. “This is some kind of sick joke, isn’t it?! I bet Zabini and Parkinson are just waiting around the corner, laughing!” 

Harry wasn’t sure where the sudden burst of anger came from. Draco was shocked at his outburst.

“Calm down, Harry. This isn’t a joke. I bloody love you.”

Harry stared at him with wide green eyes. He didn’t know what to think, and honestly, he was scared. He had never felt this way about anyone before, and he couldn’t handle it if Draco was just messing with him.

“Harry,” Draco said and gently took Harry’s hand. “I wouldn’t joke about this. I’ve wanted this…us for ages. You can ask anyone. They’ll tell you about how I never shut up about you.”

Harry cracked a small smile at that.

“This is…unexpected.”

Draco chuckled.

“I agree. But it’s welcome. So what do you say?”

“About what?”

Draco rolled his eyes.

“Being my boyfriend, obviously.”

Harry blushed, but couldn’t keep the smile off of his face.

“I would really like that.”

“Good,” Draco said and leaned in to press a soft kiss to Harry’s lips. “If this is how we reacted, I don’t even want to know what our friends will think.”

Harry laughed.

“I have a feeling yours won’t be too surprised. After all, you never shut up about me.”

“Oh shut up, Potter,” Draco grumbled, and then dragged a laughing Harry along to their next class.

'Frozen' Starter Sentences
  • "Beware the frozen heart."
  • "The skies awake, so I'm awake!"
  • "Do you wanna build a snowman?"
  • "The heart is not so easily changed."
  • "There is beauty in it....but also great danger."
  • "Fear will be your enemy."
  • "Come on let's go and play."
  • "I never see you anymore."
  • "We used to be best buddies."
  • "I wish you would tell me why!"
  • "It doesn't have to be a snowman."
  • "Conceal it, don't feel it. Don't let it show."
  • "I think some company is overdue, I've started talking to the pictures on the walls."
  • "I don't want to hurt you!"
  • "______ please, I know you're in there."
  • "People have been asking where you're been."
  • "They say have courage and I'm trying to."
  • "I'm right out here for you, just let me in."
  • "We only have each other."
  • "What are we gonna do?"
  • "Why have a ballroom with no balls?"
  • "There'll be actual real live people, it'll be totally strange."
  • "Wow am I so ready for this change."
  • "For the first time in forever, there'll be music, there'll be light."
  • "Don't know if I'm elated or gassy, but I'm somewhere in that zone."
  • "For the first time in forever, I won't be alone."
  • "I can't wait to meet everyone!"
  • "What if I meet the one?"
  • "I suddenly see him standing there, a beautiful stranger, tall and fair."
  • "I wanna stuff some chocolate in my face."
  • "Which is totally bizarre."
  • "Nothing like the life I've led so far."
  • "For the first time in forever, I could be noticed by someone."
  • "And I know it's totally crazy."
  • "At least I've got a chance."
  • "Don't let them in, don't let them see."
  • "Be the good girl you always have to be."
  • "Make one wrong move and everyone will know."
  • "But it's only for today."
  • "It's agony to wait."
  • "A chance to change my lonely world."
  • "A chance to find true love."
  • "Nothing's in my way."
  • "I'm awkward, you're gorgeous."
  • "Wait, what?"
  • "Like the chicken with the face of a monkey!"
  • "Your physique helps, I'm sure."
  • "Can I just say something crazy?"
  • "I love crazy!"
  • "I've been searching my whole life to find my own place."
  • "It's nothing like I've ever known before."
  • "Love is an open door."
  • "I mean it's crazy, we finish each others-"
  • "Sandwiches!"
  • "That's what I was gonna say!"
  • "I've never met someone who thinks so much like me."
  • "Jinx! Jinx again!"
  • "You and I were just meant to be."
  • "Say goodbye to the pain of the past."
  • "Can I say something crazy? Will you marry me?"
  • "Can I say something even crazier? Yes!"
  • "I'm sorry, I'm confused."
  • "May I talk to you please? Alone?"
  • "You can't marr someone you just met!"
  • You can if it's true love!"
  • "Oh, _____, what do you know about true love?"
  • "All you know is how to shut people out."
  • "I can't live like this anymore!"
  • "Why do you shut me out? Why do you shut the world out?"
  • "What are you so afraid of?!"
  • "I'm completely ordinary!"
  • "She/he would never hurt me."
  • "A kingdom of isolation, and it looks like I'm the queen."
  • "Couldn't keep it in, heaven knows I tried."
  • "Don't let them know? Well know they know!"
  • "Let it go."
  • "Can't hold it back anymore."
  • "I don't care what they're going to say."
  • The cold never bothered me anyway."
  • "You'll never see me cry."
  • "Here I stand, and here I'll stay."
  • "I'm never going back."
  • "The past is in the past."
  • "That perfect girl/guy is gone."
  • "She/he's a stinker."
  • "Snow. It had to be snow."
  • "Ooh, and sauna!"
  • "Hoo-hoo!"
  • "Big summer blowout!"
  • "Now back up, while I deal with this crook here."
  • "Reindeers are better than people."
  • "Yeah, people will beat you and curse you and cheat you."
  • "Everyone of them's bad, except you."
  • "But people smell better than reindeers."
  • "That's once again true, for all except you."
  • "We leave now, right now."
  • "Hold on, we like to go fast!"
  • "Wait, you got engaged to someone you just met that?!"
  • Didn't your parents ever warn you about strangers?"
  • "Foot size doesn't matter."
  • "What if you hate the way he picks his nose? And eats it."
  • "All men do it."
  • "Are you some sort of love expert?"
  • "Because I don't trust your judgement."
  • "Who marries a man she just met?!"
  • "It's true love!"
  • "You almost set me on fire!"
  • "But I just paid it off."
  • "I understand if you don't want to help me anymore."
  • "This whole thing has ruined me for helping anyone else."
  • "Sometimes I really don't like you."
  • "No, not yellow. Yellow and snow? No go."
  • "You're creepy."
  • "It's just a head!"
  • "Why are you hanging off the earth like a bat?"
  • "Hi, I'm ____ and I like warm hugs."
  • "Who's the funky looking reindeer over there?"
  • "I don't know why, but I've always loved the idea of summer."
  • "I'm guessing you don't have much experience with heat."
  • "Sometimes I like to imagine what it will be like when summer does come."
  • "The hot and the cold are both so intense, put them together it just makes sense."
  • "Winter's a good time to stay in and cuddle."
  • "I'm gonna tell him."
  • "Don't you dare!"
  • "Somebody's gotta tell him."
  • "Oh look at that, I've been impaled."
  • "I wouldn't put your foot there. Or there."
  • "Nobody wants to be alone. Except maybe you."
  • "That was like a crazy trust exercise."
  • "I'm gonna cry."
  • "Go ahead, I won't judge."
  • "Do you think she knows how to knock?"
  • "It opened! That's a first."
  • "It's a palace made of ice! Ice is my life!"
  • "Please don't shut me out again."
  • "Please don't slam the door."
  • "You don't have to keep your distance anymore."
  • "I will be right here."
  • "You mean well, but leave me be."
  • "Just stay away, and you'll be safe from me."
  • "I'm such a fool, I can't be free."
  • "We can face this thing together."
  • "What power do you have to stop me?"
  • 'It is not nice to throw people!"
  • "Don't talk to him like that."
  • "My hair? Look at your hair!"
  • "You hesitated."
  • "I like to consider myself a love expert."
  • "Take off your clothes!"
  • "Why are you holding back from such a man/woman?"
  • "So he's got a few flaws."
  • "You can fix this fixer upper with a little bit of love."
  • "He only likes to tinkle in the woods."
  • "She/he's engaged to someone else, okay?"
  • "Only an act of true love can thaw a frozen heart."
  • "Don't be the monster they fear you are."
  • "Oh, ______ if only there was someone out there who loved you."
  • "Love is putting someone elses needs before yours."
  • "Some people are worth melting for."
  • "The only frozen heart around here is yours."
  • "I could kiss you! Well, I'd like to. May we? May I? Wait, what?"
MUSICAL SENTENCE STARTERS.
  • ❝ Uh, do whatever you want, I'm super dead! ❞
  • ❝ You have a symmetrical face. If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves. That's very important. ❞
  • ❝ Ring ring, hello? Oh, hold on, it's for you - it's second place. ❞
  • ❝ You know that I ain't bragging. ❞
  • ❝ I'm reading this from Wikipedia, so it has to be true. ❞
  • ❝ Let's hatch a plot blacker than the kettle callin' the pot. ❞
  • ❝ I bet I've got til lunch at least before everyone sees I'm a spaz! ❞
  • ❝ I'm not very hungry - just gimme a double Polar Burger with everything and a cherry soda with chocolate ice cream. ❞
  • ❝ Missed your midterms and flunked shampoo! ❞
  • ❝ Hey turn around, bend over, I'll show you where my shoe fits. ❞
  • ❝ Is that unfair? -- Oh wait, I don't care. ❞
  • ❝ The truth is that you're such a dork, you kinda make it cool. ❞
  • ❝ We got more balls than the team we cheer for! ❞
  • ❝ Miss Goody Two Shoes makes me wanna barf. ❞
  • ❝ Even mocking cheerleaders cannot hide the emptiness in my soul. ❞
  • ❝ They're dogs! No! Lower than that, they're fleas on dogs! ❞
  • ❝ I'm a trust fund baby, you can trust me. ❞
  • ❝ The dinosaurs choked on the dust, they died because God said they must. ❞
  • ❝ Happy kitties, sleepy puppies, tiny duckies, sparkly ponies... ❞
  • ❝ My teen angst bullshit has a body count. ❞
  • ❝ Give my love to the leprechauns. ❞
  • ❝ I thought you were a spoiled, rich, uptight little white bitch now I think you're just white. ❞
  • ❝ I am tired of living alone with my cat! ❞
  • ❝ You drink a lot of Red Bull, don't you? ❞
  • ❝ If I get blood on the carpet my mother will kill me. ❞
  • ❝ Some say that I'm a pompous creep - somehow I don't lose that much sleep. ❞
  • ❝ Such a blunder. Sometimes it makes me wonder why I even bring the thunder. ❞
  • ❝ Shakin' at the high school hop. ❞
  • ❝ I've got lots of experience with not fitting in. Do you need some pointers? ❞
  • ❝ Ugh. You've got a left hand, use it. ❞
  • ❝ Showing up here took some guts, time to rip 'em out. ❞
  • ❝ Keep that pelvis far from me! ❞
  • ❝ Thanks, but I don't need voices in my head today. ❞
  • ❝ You don't wanna hear all the horny details. ❞
  • ❝ I gotta go get my asthma spray... ❞
  • ❝ Your perfume smells like your daddy's got money. ❞
  • ❝ Does your mommy know you eat all this crap? ❞
  • ❝ Jesus, you're making me sound like Air Supply. ❞
  • ❝ Language, honey child, please. ❞
  • ❝ Like a beautiful blonde pineapple. ❞
  • ❝ I don't rat my hair! ❞
  • ❝ My dog speaks more eloquently than thee. ❞
  • ❝ Damn, you're in worse shape than the national debt is in. ❞
  • ❝ You're my last meal on death row. ❞
  • ❝ I've got a big butt, well so what? It's good as any other! ❞
  • ❝ I led a protest march against insensitive cartoons! ❞
  • ❝ Some people are SO touchy. ❞
  • ❝ Mama gave birth to the hand-jive. ❞
  • ❝ It's hot in here and kinda smells like someone wet the bed... ❞
  • ❝ Oh... I wanted to answer the puppy question? ❞
  • ❝ You're absolutely right - should have shot him in the mouth, that would've shut him up. ❞
  • ❝ I haven't slept since 1992. ❞
  • ❝ Malum in se is an action evil in itself. Assault, murder, white shoes after labor day. ❞
  • ❝ You need a cite a more specific grievance. Here's an itemized list of all these years of diagreements. ❞
  • ❝ Donate my car to crippled kids, or to those ghetto moms on crack. ❞
  • ❝ I'm, like, gonna cry - I got tears comin' outta my nose! ❞
  • ❝ Keep your filthy paws off of my silky drawers. ❞
  • ❝ Color me stoked. ❞
  • ❝ Yo, who the f is this? ❞
  • ❝ You've got the best friggin shoes! ❞
  • ❝ Keep it positive as you slap her to the floor! ❞
  • ❝ Come on! Let's go krunkin' in the parking lot! ❞
  • ❝ I've come of age to be a raging castrating bitch! ❞
  • ❝ I'll be Socrates throwing verbal rocks at these mediocrities. ❞
  • ❝ Really stick it to the phallocentric war machine! ❞
  • ❝ Must we all descend into madness? ❞
  • ❝ It's a work of genius. I couldn't undo it if I tried.... and I tried. ❞
  • ❝ Dear God... it's scented. ❞
  • ❝ Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. ❞
  • ❝ So go on, here's my head, just hit it with a rock. ❞
  • ❝ I want a devil in skin tight leather. ❞
  • ❝ You've come so far why now are you pulling on my dick? ❞
  • ❝ You know, for a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure. ❞
  • ❝ You ain't never caught a rabbit. ❞
  • ❝ Honestly, it's kind of draining... ❞
  • ❝ I just did what you wished you could but you don't have the balls. ❞
  • ❝ I'm dazzling! Magnificent! I am the one percent! ❞
  • ❝ Now what I'm going to say may seem indelicate... ❞
  • ❝ I'm gonna French kiss with tongue like I dreamed I'd do - and not just with my pillow! ❞
  • ❝ It's like hearing a ticking sound coming from unmarked packages! ❞
  • ❝ Someone's had their morning coffee... ❞
  • ❝ We're what killed the dinosaurs! ❞
  • ❝ I don't know what you heard, but whatever it is, they started it. ❞
  • ❝ Fine, okay, I'm gay! ❞
  • ❝ You can set my bones and I know CPR. ❞
  • ❝ Immigrants - we get the job done. ❞
  • ❝ Man. What rich, romantic planet are you from? ❞
  • ❝ Whaaaaaaat. ❞
  • ❝ What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending. ❞
  • ❝ Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. ❞
  • ❝ Awesome... wow. ❞
  • ❝ I'm bigger than John Lennon! ❞
  • ❝ I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love. ❞
  • ❝ If you're going for mediocre, you've done great! ❞
  • ❝ Alright, we can't break out of here, but we sure can break a sweat! ❞
  • ❝ Gotta be going to that malt shop in the sky. ❞
  • ❝ It's got groove! It's got meaning! ❞
  • ❝ When I fight I make the other side panicky! ❞
  • ❝ That is a metro hetero jerk! ❞
  • ❝ Love is like forever this is no time to economize! ❞
  • ❝ Their thinkin' is stinkin' and a little outdated. ❞
  • ❝ I'm probably too cool for you, so friend request denied. ❞
  • ❝ You're on Jiffy Pop detail. ❞
  • ❝ I don't have to always be right - when I'm with you, I just am. ❞
  • ❝ I'm raisin' hell and I'm a felon in a four foot frame. ❞
  • ❝ Guys who wear that get beat up on my street. ❞
  • ❝ It's like making love to you all night, NO WAIT! It feels so much better! ❞
  • ❝ No sleep for you, better chug that Mountain Dew. ❞
  • ❝ All I got was a running nose and Asiatic flu. ❞
  • ❝ You ain't no friend of mine. ❞
  • ❝ We have fought on like, seventy-five different fronts. ❞
  • ❝ I'm not freaking out, I'm really okay, I'm totally chill. ❞
  • ❝ If your Irish boy tires of you, you're allowed to shoot him in the knees. ❞
  • ❝ You ever see somebody ruin their own life? ❞
  • ❝ The more you jump around and scream, the sexier you seem. ❞
  • ❝ Peachy keen, jellybean. ❞
  • ❝ Both your hair and shoes are flat. ❞
  • ❝ Lookin' hot, Cream of Mushroom! ❞
Mean Girls Starters
  • ❝If you're from Africa, why are you white?❞
  • ❝Oh my God, [name], you can't just ask people why they're white.❞
  • ❝Boo, you whore!❞
  • ❝Nice wig, [name]. What's it made of?❞
  • ❝Your Mom's chest hair!❞
  • ❝On Wednesdays we wear pink!❞
  • ❝Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining [name]'s life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.❞
  • ❝Hey, buddy, you're not pretending anymore. You're plastic. Cold, shiny, hard plastic.❞
  • ❝You know what! It's not my fault you're like, in love with me, or something!❞
  • ❝See? That's the thing with you plastics. You think everybody is in love with you when actually, everybody HATES you! Like, [name], for example, he broke up with Regina and guess what? He still doesn't want you! So why are you still messing with [name], [name]? I'll tell you why, because you are a mean girl! You're a bitch! Here. You can have this. It won a prize.❞
  • ❝And I want my pink shirt back! I want my pink shirt back!❞
  • ❝That is so fetch!❞
  • ❝Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!❞
  • ❝God! I am so sorry [name]. Really, I don't know why I did this. I guess it's probably because I've got a big lesbian crush on you! Suck on that! AY-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI!❞
  • ❝[Name], I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Nobles. And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it. And I'm sorry for repeating it now.❞
  • ❝And none for [name], bye!❞
  • ❝Get in loser, we're going shopping.❞
  • ❝Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die! Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers.❞
  • ❝I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school... I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy...❞
  • ❝She doesn't even go here!❞
  • ❝Raise your hand if you have ever been personally victimized by Regina George?❞
  • ❝I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.❞
  • ❝I hear she does car commercials... in Japan.❞
  • ❝Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.❞
  • ❝One time she met John Stamos on a plane... And he told her she was pretty.❞
  • ❝One time she punched me in the face... it was awesome.❞
  • ❝Why are you eating a Kalteen bar?❞
  • ❝Man, I hate those things. Coach Carr makes us eat those when we want to move up a weight class.❞
  • ❝Why should Caesar just get to stomp around like a giant while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar, right? Brutus is just as smart as Caesar, people totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar, and when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody because that's not what Rome is about! We should totally just STAB CAESAR!❞
  • ❝[Name] had cracked.❞
  • ❝Hell, no. I did *not* leave the South Side for this!❞
  • ❝Somebody wrote in that book that I'm lying about being a virgin, 'cause I use super-jumbo tampons, but I can't help it if I've got a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina!❞
  • ❝There's a 30% chance that it's already raining!❞
  • ❝I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me... but I can't help it that I'm so popular.❞
  • ❝I gave him everything! I was half a virgin when I met him.❞
  • ❝Do you wanna do something fun? Wanna go to taco bell?❞
  • ❝I can't go to taco bell, I'm on an all-carb diet. GOD [name] you're so stupid!❞
  • ❝It's like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it's going to rain.❞
  • ❝That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I've ever seen.❞
  • ❝She's totally rich because her dad invented Toaster Streudels.❞
  • ❝That's why her hair is so big, it's full of secrets.❞
  • ❝She's the queen bee - the star, those other two are just her little workers.❞
  • ❝And they have this book, this burn book, where they write mean things about all the girls in our grade.❞
  • ❝Oh my God - Danny DeVito! I love your work!❞
  • ❝At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die.❞
  • ❝Is butter a carb?❞
  • ❝You can't sit with us!❞
  • ❝Fine! You can walk home, bitches.❞
  • ❝And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.❞
  • ❝My grandma takes her wig off when she's drunk.❞
  • ❝I love her. She's like a Martian!❞
  • ❝Are they not suppose to be let out when they're grounded?❞
  • ❝She thinks she's gonna have a party and not invite me? Who does she think she is?❞
  • ❝I like invented her, you know what I mean?❞
  • ❝I just want you to know, if you ever need anything, don't be shy, OK? There are NO rules in the house. I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom.❞
  • ❝Can I get you guys anything? Some snacks? A condom? Let me know! Oh, God love ya.❞
  • ❝Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.❞
  • ❝Sorry, we only carry sizes 1, 3, and 5. You could try Sears.❞
  • ❝Regina George is not sweet! She's a scum-sucking road whore, she ruined my life!❞
  • ❝I know it may look like I was being like a bitch, but that's only because I was acting like a bitch.❞
  • ❝Your face smells like peppermint!❞
  • ❝Oh, you'll get socialized all right, a little slice like you.❞
  • ❝You're a regulation hottie.❞
  • ❝We do not have a clique problem at this school.❞
  • ❝But you do have to watch out for "frenemies".❞
  • ❝I know she's kind of socially retarded and weird, but she's my friend... so, just promise me you won't make fun of her!❞
  • ❝Half the people in this room are mad at me, and the other half only like me because they think I pushed somebody in front a bus, so that's not good.❞
  • ❝I don't hate you cuz yo' fat... yo' fat cuz I hate you!❞
  • ❝You smell like a baby prostitute.❞
  • ❝Is your muffin buttered?❞
  • ❝Jason, you do not come to a party at my house with Gretchen and then scam on some poor innocent girl right in front of us three days later. She's not interested. Do you want to have sex with him?❞
  • ❝Good. So it's settled. So you can go shave your back now. Bye, Jason.❞
  • ❝Finally, Girl World was at peace.❞
  • ❝Hey, check it out. Junior Plastics.❞
  • ❝Damn, Africa, what happened?❞
  • ❝I saw [name] wearing army pants and flip flops, so I bought army pants and flip flops.❞
  • ❝Oh, hi. Did you wanna buy some drugs?❞
  • ❝Make sure you check out her mom's boob job. They're hard as rocks.❞
  • ❝Whatever, I'm getting cheese fries.❞
  • ❝Okay, I'm going to forgive you because I'm a very Zen person... and I'm on a lot of pain medication right now.❞
  • ❝Can you believe my f-ing mom is here?❞
  • ❝I have this theory, that if you cut off all her hair she'd look like a British man.❞
  • ❝I care. Every year the seniors through this dance for the underclassmen called the Spring Fling. And whosoever is elected King and Queen automatically become head of the Student Activities Committee and since I am an active member of the Student Activities Committee, I would safely say, I care.❞
  • ❝Irregardless, ex-boyfriends are just off limits to friends. I mean that's just like the rules of feminism.❞
  • ❝Did your teacher ever try to sell you marijuana or ecstasy tablets?❞
  • ❝What are marijuana tablets?❞
  • ❝You cannot do that. That is social suicide. Damn! You are so lucky you have us to guide you.❞
  • ❝Oh, I love seeing teachers outside of school. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs.❞
  • ❝Everyone in Africa knows Swedish.❞
  • ❝Made out with a hot dog? Oh my God that was one time!❞
  • ❝I know having a boyfriend might seem like the only thing important to you right now, but you don't have to dumb yourself down in order for a guy to like you.❞
  • ❝Come on! We could publish it and then everybody would see what an ax-wound she really is!❞
  • ❝And you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week, so I guess you chose today.❞
  • ❝She's not even that good looking if you really look at her.❞
  • ❝I don't know, now that she's getting fatter she's got pretty big jugs.❞
  • ❝Watch out please! Fresh meat coming through!❞
  • ❝I'd rather see you out there shakin' that thang.❞
  • ❝You can do this. There's nothing to break your focus, because not one of those Marymount boys is cute.❞
  • ❝There are two kinds of evil people in this world. Those who do evil stuff and those who see evil stuff being done and don't try to stop it.❞
  • ❝Well, I mean you wouldn't buy a skirt without asking your friends first if it looks good on you.❞
  • ❝The limit does not exist!❞
  • ❝I just wanted to say that you're all winners. And that I couldn't be happier the school year is ending.❞
  • ❝It's called the South Beach Fat Flush and all you drink is cranberry juice for 72 hours.❞
  • ❝She's fabulous, but she's evil.❞
  • ❝So, are you gonna send any candy canes?❞
  • ❝No. I don't send them, I just get them. So you better send me one, byotch.❞
  • ❝'Cause she's a life ruiner. She ruins people's lives.❞
  • ❝Oh no, I can't say anything else until I have a parent or lawyer present.❞
  • ❝Did you see nipple? It only counts if you saw a nipple!❞
  • ❝Oh, no. It was coming up again, word vomit... no, wait a minute... Actual vomit.❞
  • ❝Grool... I meant to say cool and then I started to say great.❞
  • ❝I'm a cool mom! Right Regina?❞
  • ❝Good news, they didn't get run over... Bad news, they're still flat.❞
  • ❝Hey, hey, hey. How are my best girlfriends?❞
  • ❝Oh god, busted! Just start apologizing and crying. No, play it cool.❞
  • ❝I mean no offense, but how could she send you a candy cane? She doesn't even like you that much. Maybe she feels weird around me because I'm the only person who knows about her nose job. Oh my god, pretend you didn't hear that.❞
Applesauce

Hey! I was wondering if you can do a one shot where y/n is Daryl’s teenage sister and gets very overprotective when some teenage guys in Alexandria start trying to flirt with her? Maybe him and Carl - y/n’s best friend - team up to make all the guys get away from her or something? Thanks if you’re able to do this!

I hope you like it! 💕


-I think it’s awesome that you’ve survived so long out there, you know? —a boy, whose name escaped your memory told you. —This dork hasn’t even gone beyond the walls once.

-I have! —the guy who he was talking about complained in a shrill voice.

You were at the welcoming party that Deanna had been so excited about. You had hesitated about going, but Rick insisted. Now, three teenage guys were crowding you and trying to get you to talk to them.

-Whatever, I think it’s really cool how you killed those shits and all that. —the third boy said. You smiled softly, and it seemed somewhat fake.

-But, uh, I think we have to leave, right? —the first one scratched his head anxiously.

-Right, because my dad… you know, he wants me to… I have to help with… you know… that. —another one moved his hands nervously in the air. The last one didn’t bother in saying a word, he just walked away with his friends.

You frowned in confusion, but you were a little relieved that they left you alone at last. As you were turning around to go somewhere else, you bumped with your brother, who was standing right behind you.

-And I was wondering what made them run away like scared little kids. —you raised an eyebrow and crossed your arms over your chest.

-They best stay the fuck away, then. —he grunted, his words made you chuckle.

-Agreed.

Daryl was your older brother. He was the overprotecting kind, which you always hated, but after flesh-eating corpses started to roam the Earth, you thanked God for him and for all those times we risked his own ass for yours.

-This party sucks. —you said as you sat on the porch steps right next to Carl.

-Oh, it’s a party? —he asked in a sarcastic tone. You laughed and shook your head.

-I highly doubt that.

-I didn’t know Daryl was coming. —Carl told you, expecting you would tell him why your brother had decided to show up.

-Yeah, me neither. —you frowned. —Guess he just wanted to check on me.

-Can you blame him? —he laughed. —We’ve been here for a day and you already have a tone of friends.

-Are you kidding me? —you joined him in his laugh. —They’re not my friends.

-Why not?

-I just… —you made a small pause, your eyes locked on your feet. —I don’t think I’m ready for that.

-For friends? —he joked.

-You know what I mean. —you bumped his shoulder with yours. —These people don’t live in the real world, and I don’t think I can go back to the old one.

Carl nodded and you knew he understood you perfectly, you could always count on him listening to you.

On the morning after the party, everyone in your group went to do their jobs. As you weren’t old enough, Carl and you didn’t get one, so you stayed home and took care of Judith.

-Can you pass me the formula? —Carl asked as he carried Judith in his arms. —It’s in the fridge.

-Sure. —you opened the fridge and took the little bottle where they kept Judith’s formula. You heated it up in the microwave and then gave it to Carl. He softly bounced his sister as she drank the milk. There was a knock on the door.

-I got it. —you said when you noticed Carl was hypnotized by his baby sister. You opened the door and found the three boys standing there with big smiles.

-Hey. —you said calmly, trying to fake a smile.

-Hey! —one of them greeted with excitement. —We were just about to go to Jake’s house and play some video games, would you like to come?

-Uhm… —you were thinking about it, or more like thinking about a good excuse. You didn’t have to think much, because Carl appeared from behind you.

-She doesn’t want to go. —he said sternly. Judith was no longer in his arms, you figured it was for intimidating purposes.

-Carl. —you reprimanded, knowing how rude he sounded. Nevertheless, he ignored you.

-We have stuff to do, so you should go now. —he told them as he stood steadily next to you. The boys shifted their eyes between Carl and you. You thought Carl was being way too rude, but you were somewhat grateful that he declined their invitation for you.

-Yeah, we just have a lot to do right now. —you scratched your head. —Maybe next time.

They left quickly and you closed the door.

-You’re welcome. —Carl said and went to pick up Judith from her chair.

-I didn’t say thank you. —you raised an eyebrow.

-You don’t have to, I know you don’t want to hang out with them. —he said as he gave his sister her bottle back.

-Because you just know everything about me. —you said in a sarcastic tone as you rolled your eyes, which only made him chuckle.

-As your best friend, I can say I do. —he laughed and kept bouncing Judith in his arms.

The guys stayed away from you for a couple of days, and you hated to admit that you actually missed the interaction with people of your own age a little.

One morning, you woke up to the sound of Judith’s cries. She was hungry and Rick and Carl weren’t home at the moment, so you had to take care of her.
You ran downstairs and went to the kitchen, there was no more formula in the fridge or the apple sauce that Judith loved so much, so you had to go to the pantry for more.

As you walked down the street, people shot you strange looks. You wondered why, but as soon as you looked down and realized you were still in your pj’s, you understood why. However, you didn’t care. After all that you had seen and lived beyond those walls, walking around the streets with your nightwear was nothing.

-Hey, Olivia. —you greeted as you walked inside the pantry. Olivia smiled at you.

-Hey there, (Y/N)! —she said in a joyful voice, she was always happy, for some reason. —Let me guess, apple sauce.

You nodded and Olivia disappeared between the counters, looking for the apple sauce. Another set of steps were heard inside the pantry and you turned around to see who it was.

-Hi. —one of the guys that had been talking to you greeted happily.

-Hey. —you reciprocated, giving him a soft smile.

Olivia came back with your baby food and handed it to you. She acknowledged the boy’s presence and smiled at him.

-Jake, what can I get you? —she asked gently.

-Some syrup, my mom’s making pancakes. —he said. Olivia’s smile grew wider, but who could blame her? His mom was making pancakes.

She disappeared again into the organized shelves. You already had the applesauce so you turned around and walked away.

You were almost arriving to your house when you heard someone running behind you. You turned around and found Jake right behind you, out of breath and holding a bottle of syrup in his hand.

-(Y/N)… —he said as he tried to recover his breath, and you chuckled.

-Yes?

-Uh, my mom made pancakes. —he told you awkwardly. —I was wondering if you… would like to, uh, have breakfast with me- with us?

You hesitated, your brother didn’t like those boys around you and he did pretty stupid things when he got all overprotective, but on the other hand, pancakes.

-Uh, sure. —you said at last and he released a deep breath.

You started walking towards his house, but as you were crossing the street you heard a familiar sound. The engine of a motorcycle roared loudly and it was your brother’s. He sped up and stopped right in front of your friend, who jumped back and almost had a heart attack.

-Daryl! —you yelled at him, angry and completely embarrassed at what he had done.

You picked up the syrup bottle he had dropped and gave it to him once he had calmed down

-I’m so sorry. —you told him wholeheartedly.

-Uh, yeah, i-it’s okay. —he lifted his hand to take the syrup and you noticed it was shaking.

-Where you goin’? —Daryl asked gruffly.

-To his house. —you told him.

-You ain’t got no business in this lil shit’s house. —he said violently.

-Daryl. —you said through gritted teeth, he was being way too rude. You turned to face Jake. —I’m sorry about him, he’s an asshole.

-No, it’s fine. —he shook his head. —I have to be home right now anyway, I’ll see you around.

Daryl made the engine roar again, which made your friend jump again.

-Or maybe not. —he said nervously and started walking away. —Bye.

-Bye. —you murmured as you watched him running towards his house, you turned to look at Daryl and shot him a deadly look.

-Get in. —he gestured at his bike and all you could do was scream at him.

-No! What the hell is wrong with you? Why do you always do this? First it was that guy before all this happened, then it was Carl, now it’s those guys! It’s like you don’t want me to have friends at all!

-You can be friends with Carl. —he said simply. You grunted in frustration and stomped all the way to your house.

You slammed the door behind you and screamed again. You realized you were still holding the applesauce jar inside your hand and suddenly remembered Judith had been hungry since the early morning.
You ran upstairs and entered her room quickly. You found Carl holding her and feeding her something that wasn’t applesauce.

You sighed in relief and leaned on the doorframe. Carl looked at you and laughed, there was still an annoyed expression in your face.

-Don’t be so angry at him, he just wants to protect you. —he told you.

-Yeah, I know, it’s just that… —you stopped abruptly as you realized something. —Wait, what are you talking about?

-About he almost ran over your boyfriend. —he chuckled and spoke his answer as if it were obvious.

-How do you know that?

-Everyone saw that.

-Yeah, but that was less than two minutes ago. And you were already here.

-Uh…

-How did you know?

-Okay, okay. —he sighed. —I told Daryl where you’d be today.

-Carl! —you scolded. —How did you even know that I would go to the pantry.

-We didn’t run out of baby food, I just hid it all in my room.

-You’re an asshole, just like Daryl.

-Sorry, but I think we agree that you shouldn’t be anywhere near those guys.

-Why do you think you can decide everything that happens in my life?

-(Y/N). —Carl called you, trying to make you calm down but you only stormed out of the room with furious steps.

You walked out of the house and saw Daryl standing there, his motorcycle parked at the driveway.

He tried to reach for you, but you shook his head off your arm and kept walking, unaware that you still held the jar of applesauce in your hand.

You arrived to the lake. There were a couple of people walking their dogs, but no one who knew you enough to talk to you. Good, because you wanted to be alone.

You took a deep breath and tried to let the green grass and fresh air put you at ease. Your face was still red from being so angry, but it started losing the radish shade as you calmed down.

Suddenly, you noticed the applesauce. It bad been inside the same hand all along, you had never shifted it to your other hand or placed it on the table when you got home.

You were hungry, you hadn’t had breakfast, and you figured that Judith wouldn’t mind if you ate one single jar of her food, there were still apple trees inside the community and people who made the applesauce, so it was okay if you ate it.

The lid made a pop sound as you opened the jar, and two of your finger sank into the soft food. You used your fingers as a spoon and put them inside your mouth, feeling the sweet flavour in your taste buds.

The taste of it brought you back to your childhood. Your father, a drunken mess who was never home, and your mother, deceased in a fire. Merle had also taken care of you when you were a kid, but most of the time he was getting high with his friends and neglecting his little siblings.
But Daryl had always been there.

When you were around 2 years old and none of your parents were home for days, somehow you remembered, that Daryl went to the store and bought applesauce for both of you, even if he was too old for it.

Nostalgic tears flooded your eyes as you realized you had been too hard on him. He just wanted to take care of you, as he had always done.

You ran back to the house and found his motorcycle still parked outside. As you were about to open the door, you noticed from the corner of your eye a silhouette at your right, sitting on the porch.
You realized it was Daryl. His arms were on his knees and his gaze lost on the floor. He blinked and turned to look at you as you sat down next to him.

-Sorry. —he muttered. His voice warmed your heart, he didn’t use to apologize often.

-It’s okay. —you told him. —I understand why you did it.

-Yeah, I’ve been thinkin’ ‘bout it too. —he said and his eyes returned to the floor as his hands fiddled with something. —You can have friends and shit, it ain’t my business.

You smiled and leaned your head on his shoulder.

-Some things are your business, like keeping me safe when we’re out there and risking your life for me. —you chuckled.

He pushed you off of him playfully with his shoulder, but you leaned your head on it again.

-Damn right it’s my business. —he said and placed his head on yours.

Vic Fuentes Fan Fiction
****TRIGGER WARNING****  This imagine includes self harm and suicide references. It is not meant to romanticise either thing in anyway, and if you are going through either of these things, please feel free to message me anytime. Um yeah so I wrote this imagine because I was reading some other ones and got inspired, plus there’s nothing better to do between midnight and five in the morning. I’ve never written one before, so tell me if it’s really bad, Everything’s Not Alright:
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So this is it. I can feel myself growing weaker and weaker. I want to phone for help. No, this is what’s best for everyone. I look over to where the note I scrawled earlier lies in the sink, along with the blood stained blade that was clasped in my hand until my hand was too weak to grip it, and it fell on top of my note to Vic. I didn’t want the note make me sound weak, or attention seeking, or selfish, or anything really, I just had to explain. He deserved that at least.  It wasn’t that I thought he’s miss me. I mean, it would shock him, and he would be upset initially. But he could do better. He could do so much better - everyone could. They’d all be better off without me.  So I kept the note simple. ‘Vic,I know you must have some understanding of how I feel, I hear you sing about this kind of thing a lot, I know how you’ve felt, and I’m so glad that’s all behind you now. You’re gonna do so great baby, you’ve still got so much left to give, and I don’t want to hold you back. I can’t hold you back. And that’s why it’s okay that I go. Please don’t feel like you should’ve done something, because I want you to know that you did. You did everything. You were the one person who made me feel beautiful once again. Even if it was just temporarily.I love you so much, and if I mean anything to you, sorry but I’ve made up my mind x’ The pills have begun to kick in, I feel so drowsy now, barely able to keep my eyes open, or focus my mind clearly on anything. Although there is one thing that keeps re-surfacing. I can’t help remembering Vic’s face, when he saw my cuts for the first time, after he came back from a gig one night. I think he genuinely cared. Have I done the right thing? Should I not have taken them? No, it’s okay, he’ll be okay. He’s strong, and he doesn’t need something like me holding him back. He almost didn’t play his show tonight because he’d been worried about me. Well that will be okay now, he won’t have to worry again. He’ll be free. I’ll be free. I’m in that twilight zone now. I’m not     quite            here.  I can hear my heart beat, getting louder and louder. Or is it footsteps coming up the stairs?  Crash. The sound of the bathroom door slamming into the wall behind it made it clear. Vic was home. Shit. I’d hoped to not have to be awake when he got back, but as soon as he came into view, my brain welcomed the image of his soft face.  ’Fuck. Babe, what’ve you done? Wha’. He whispered, because his voice wasn’t quite there. He couldn’t even finish his sentence before his trembling lip lead to a full break down into tears. He leant over me, placed an arm beneath my knees, and one behind my back and left arm, and scooped me up and out of the empty bath, clutching me close.  My drowsy eyes looked up into his, I recognised the desperation. When he spoke this time, it was barely audible, but easy to read on his lips. 'Why?’.  As he came close to breaking down again, I could feel his body quivering underneath me. He lay me down on the floor softly, before the quivering became more rapid, and he started shaking uncontrollably. *Vic’s Point of View* I couldn’t control my breathing, it was rapid and uneven. Why had she done this to herself? How had she done this? How had she carved so many deep cuts into her beautiful body?  Looking around for help, my eyes found the empty pill bottle that had been flung across the floor. As the adrenaline pumped through my body, I sat her up and pressed my fingers to the back of her throat, but she was too drowsy to react. I can’t give up. I begin to pat her increasingly harder on the back, and ram my fingers towards the back of her throat this time. I hesitate for a split second each time I do it, I don’t want to hurt her, I can’t stand being so forceful to something so delicate, but there’s no other way, she needs this to stay alive. I look down at her with such desperation, and yet again force my fingers deep into her mouth, and this time she gags. With sign of hope, I quickly repeat my actions, and finally she wretches, bringing up the contents of her stomach.  *Normal Point of View*  I suddenly begin to feel a lot more real, like I’ve been pulled back into the world. Why? Why did he do this? Couldn’t he see that this was what was best for him? I couldn’t have him constantly worrying about me when I wasn’t with him, that’s no life, and he deserved better. So why would he do this?  He’s still being quite rough with me, after I finish gaging, he cleans me up and lifts me to sit on the edge of the bath, resting me against the wall for the brief moment he turns his back on me, his hand never leaving mine. With his other hand, he quickly reaches into the cupboard and grabs a bottle, spins back round and empties the contents onto my arms, thighs and sides. The pain that had begun to fade with the drowsiness gushes back through my body, into each individual gash. My body jumps as I tense up and yell out in pain, but he grabs me and pulls me in close. After the initial flood of pain subsides, I relax my body a little, and Vic leans me back up against the wall. He says something as he rushes out of the bathroom, but I don’t pay much attention. I feel so exhausted and weak, emotionally and physically. I close my eyes. Vic comes racing back into the room with a huge roll of soft white bandages, and, more gently this time, approaches me and begins to lift my arm and wrap it carefully. Each time I wince he pauses and looks at me apologetically, and each time I give him a weak smile, to let him know I’m okay.  He tends to each part of my torn flesh, then, being careful to avoid touching any of the wounded areas, he lifts me and carries me through to our bedroom.  He lies me down, pulls the blanket up from the bottom of the bed, then wraps my body with his, gently kissing the back of my head. I close my eyes, and fall asleep almost immediately. The few times I wake up, I look around, panicked, but Vic’s still right there, wide awake, holding me tight. The next day, I wake up late in the afternoon, and hear Vic talking to someone downstairs, he sounds as though he’s crying. By the time I gather up the strength to sit up, and get out of bed, Vic has come in, his phone in his hand.  I smile at him, and he rushes over and sits me back down, he can see I’m trembling with the effort of standing.  'Who was that on the phone?’ I ask. 'Oh, you heard? I wasn’t sure that you were awake.’ 'I only heard you just as you were hanging up’. He looks at the floor, then up at me. 'It was Tony,’ he says, 'he says he’s coming over to see how you are. He was, uh, devistated when I told him.’ 'You told Tony?!’ I wasn’t annoyed at Vic, but Tony had been my best friend since we were kids, and he’s already dealt with enough of my shit. 'All the guys knew what I suspected when I left the gig last night, I’m sorry. I did try and tell him you probably wouldn’t be up for seeing anyone, but he said he had to see you. He sounded desperate.’ 'It’s okay Vic, it’ll be okay seeing him. I guess I’ll have to clean myself up a bit then’, I say, as I glance in the mirror on the wall. 'I look like utter shit.’ He’s about to say something, when I stand up, and with all the strength I can gather, walk across to my dressing table, and pick up my hairbrush. I begin to lift the brush to my head, but my arms feel so heavy today. Seeing me struggle, Vic comes over. 'Here,’ he says, as he sits me down on the floor at the end of the bed, and he sits on the bed. Then he carefully takes the loose bun which he must have tied last night, unties the band, and begins to brush my hair gently. I let my head fall back onto his lap as he continues to brush my hair slowly, and after a while, I feel him begin to tremble. Although I’m facing away from him, I can feel him crying. Here it comes. 'Why did you do it babe?!’ he blurts out. I begin to tremble as well, and tears fill my eyes, but I remain silent. 'I don’t… I can’t… I mean… What if I’d got home five minutes later? What if you’d taken the pills five minutes earlier? What if you’d done something that killed you instantly? I just can’t help thinking about all these what ifs!’ I want to say something, I want to explain, but I can’t. The back of my throat starts to sting, and no words come out. But then, all of a sudden, my words find me again.  'I couldn’t do it anymore! I couldn’t live my life watching you be, well, you, and know that you had to put up with me everyday. You’re beyond perfect and I don’t even compare to you, and if you weren’t going to let me break up with you for your own sake, I had to find another way of freeing you!'  His hands had stopped brushing my hair now, and he pulls his legs up into his chest and rests his head into his knees. It was obvious he was in floods of tears, but I couldn’t face him, I couldn’t see him like that, it would break me. 'You don’t need to be perfect, because you’re perfect for me! I don’t go out with you because I feel sorry for you, or because I feel like I can’t break up with you, or because you’re best friends with Tony, or for any other reason, it because I’m so fucking deeply, madly, stupidly in love with you okay?!’ He was yelling pretty loud, and he realises. His voice becomes more gentle as he slides down onto the floor next to me, and touches my cheek for me to look at him. 'I’m so fucking in love with you, and I couldn’t live if anything happened to you.’ 'I’m sorry,’ I whisper through my tears, and he pulls me in close and presses his face against mine. *A couple of hours later*  The doorbell rings, and Vic gets up from lying behind me on the sofa. I hear him unlatch the door, and as soon as it opens, Tony throws himself into Vic’s arms, giving him a reassuring hug. Their hug lasts for at least a minute, then I hear Tony ask where I am. He runs through to the sitting room doorway, where he sees me, and stops. We make eye contact, and I can see the sadness in his eyes. He walks across the room, and as I sit up, he flings himself around me. I wince as the cuts in my body twinge, but smile. He holds me tight, like he has so many times before, then, when he eventually pulls back, looks me straight in the eye, and smiles. 'Im so glad you’re okay’. He kisses me on the forehead, then rejoins Vic, who was stood watching from the doorway.  As I lie back down, I can hear them talking in the kitchen, they both sound so emotional, I can’t believe I did this to them.  That night in bed, I roll over to face Vic, who’s eyes are closed, but I know he is awake.  'I love you so much.’ I whisper. His eyes remain closed, but he smiles. 'I love you too babe, more than you could ever imagine.’
Late

Warnings: Swears, omg.

Pairings: TxReader
For: My friend who is kinda cool. You know who you are K!

In which Trevor is once again late in meeting our dear reader. She’s kind of fucking pissed. Some fluffy fluff because I’m in a good mood.

____________________________________

It was high noon in Sandy Shores and you were dressed to the nines.

Leaning against the heated metal of your car you gulped down the last of your Sprunk. The cool, bubbly liquid felt good against the inside of your throat. It had been quite a while since you had spent as long as you had done getting ready. You’d gone and fixed your hair, waxed your legs, had your nails done in a subtle shade of light pink; and on top of all the little details of your grooming you’d gone out and brought new shoes. A pair of ridiculous but cute nude heels. The extra height helped you feel more sexy. Confident. 

Those feelings had however all but diminished as the straps pulled snug against your sore heels. You couldn’t help but think that if it wasn’t for tropical weather you could have felt been a bit cheerier. Still, the sun continued to burn in the clear sky causing you to sweat off the last remainders of this mornings make-up off. All effort had literally melted away. Frustrated you polished off the last of your drink, before dropping it to the ground and kicking the empty tin as hard as your dumb heels would allow you too.

‘Fuck this.’ You muttered, pushing the wet fringe that stuck to your forehead away.

It had been over an hour and still Trevor had yet to turn up.

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lladybxg  asked:

Marinette was nervous and determined to let him know just what she felt for him. Even if he was getting married. She mustered enough courage to confront him right before he had to walk down the aisle. "Adrien, I just wanted you to know that I've always loved you. I know I should have told you sooner and I still know you have feelings for Ladybug too. Don't marry this girl. You don't love her. You love Ladybug. She then gently placed a kiss on his lips then pulled back, expecting the worse.

My muse is getting married to the wrong person. Tell my muse what would your muse say in order to get them to change their minds?

[Wow, so this was just gonna be Adrien reacting to Mari’s kiss, but IDK what happened. Suddenly this transformed from an rp reply into a oneshot drabble fic. So, uh… yeah… here you go. Heh heh]

Adrien stayed frozen in place, face flushed. All of his second guessing and anxiety over his - practically arranged- marriage coming crashing down upon her words. He was a wreck. 

What in the world was he doing going through with this? How did Marinette know he loved Ladybug? Why was his heart pounding in his chest? Why did he felt jolts shooting down his spine when her lips pressed against his? Why did his stomach flip and his breath hitch and his hands start to move for her waist? Why did she flee so fast? And just how long had she been in love him?

He gasped as his knees gave way. Sinking to the floor of his dressing room, his hands fumbling to loosen his too tight tie. He felt light-headed. His stomach felt like he swallowed about a hundred akuma. Why couldn’t he seem to breathe? 

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To the people complaining about how hard it is to have one bias in BTS.
  • Me: *wakes up*
  • Me: how's jimin doing is he eating well is he okay is he tired is he happy with himself is he working too hard is he exercising his voice is he making sure he's not straining his vocal cords is he caring about himself as much as everyone else is he accepting help is he taking the advice from the right people has he identified the difference between hard work and being too hard on himself does he know his limits and that it's okay to have limits does he know he's never slacked off does he know his expectations are what make him feel like he fails but it's not a product of reality does he know how strong of a person and a presence he is does he know when to let go of things is he sleEPING
  • Me: how's tae doing is he playing games is he encouraging everyone to have fun is he communicating has he seen any kids lately any animals is he feeling accepted and appreciated is he living in the moment is he being a honest compassionate genius is he getting his space and serious time does he know it's okay if he can't make people understand and it's not a defect of his skills it's not his fault that he's not being heard does he know that some things are out of his control and it's okay does he know that sometimes people don't see the relevance in what he's saying and that's okay and is he making sure his hyungs are alIVE
  • Me: how's jin doing what has he cooked lately is he playing pokemon is he on the wii is his fliphone okay how are his hats and circular glasses is he feeding everyone has he told himself he's handsome a minimum of ten times today has he checked up on everyone's psychological health and stability does he know that i love how comfortable he is in his skin is he living contently has he caught up with his family does he know how much he is appreciated and how much of a lasting effect he has on everyone around him does he know how attentive and perceptive he is does he know how much i love that he continues being himself and how stable and hard-working and reasonable and positive and brave and professional he is and so much perseverance he deserves the spotlight but doesn't always take it just like when he wrote the lyrics for propose guys and didn't even give himself a big part he works so hard on dancing and doesn't feel the need to be validated by others words because he feels appreciated where he needs to be does he know how special he is does he know how much we love his go-getter attitude and that no one has forgotten how amazing of an actor he is how he enjoys life how he's mature and knows what to keep private does he know how cute he looks with glasses on and how anyone who can't see his charm is blind and how he has so many cool interests and how he knows everyone's potential and has standards for them has he given everyone equAL HUGS TODAY
  • Me: how's namjoon doing is he thinking deeply what books has he read lately does he know that no amount of thinking things through can prevent slip ups and that's okay does he know how sincere h is does he know how much of an individual he is and how much i love that is he contemplating life is he making good songs is he encouraging everyone is he telling everyone they're wrong when they snub themselves is he putting his arms around everyone and making contact in that way he does which shows his love in the little things is his phone out of memory did he remember his earphones is hE BUYING THE CLOTHES HE WANTS
  • Me: how's yoongi is he sleeping well how's his neck pillow doing has he remembered to eat does he feel like he's good enough does he give himself enough credit is he getting his introvert time is he content is he identifying his emotions healthily is he being attentive of the members is he putting logic to their insecurities in order to relieve them is he being strict is he keeping bts in a row is he subtly but consistently showing them love in all those little ways is he expressing his deeply felt emotions is hE SELF ANALYZING
  • Me: how's jungkook is he making faces is he dancing is he working hard is he being overly competitive is his head in the clouds is he being hard on himself does he know how perfect he is does he know that he's as productive as 1000000 american teenagers is he being comfortable with himself with his true self does he know it's okay to show his emotions he doesn't have to be cool don't feel too pressured is he accepting things is he speaking up is he sTILL RUSHING TO GROW UP
  • Me: how's hoseok is he being positive is he acknowledging his negative emotions is he living in the moment is he freestyling does he know he's an adequate rapper does he know we care about his mixtape has he been getting love is he screaming enough is he releasing his stress by releasing all of his emotions no seriously are his stress levels okay is he sick is he being too self sacrificing iS HE IGNORING HOW HE FEELS THINKING IT WILL JUST
  • Me: *takes first breath of the day*
  • Me: oh god i feel so bad for writing more on jin i love them all so much it's just i feel like so fed up with how no one appreciates him
  • Me: and oh god i feel like i didn't do too well on some of the other members but
  • Me: i love them so much i just
  • Me: i have to give them equal gifsets equal photo sets it's too much it's too much why can't i just have one bias then it's easy
  • Me: *comes home*
  • Me: i feel like i've been posting a lot of taehyung, jimin, yoongi, and namjoon lately
  • Me: and why do i keep forgetting someone when i do the tags???? what's wrong with me????
  • Me: i feel so guilty i'll post a lot of jin and hoseok and jungkook!!! i love them too idk
  • Me: i posted a lot of them and now it feels uneven??? i need to do equal pictures
  • Me: *gets ready for bed*
  • Me: i'm going to post some maknae like awwww- wait i like this picture but that would mean jimin gets three pictures and tae and jungkook get two each unacceptable i'll have to find two more pictures of-
  • Me: well now i need to post some hyung line they're great too
  • Me: *falling asleep*
  • Me: i feel like i haven't given enough attention to namjoon today and why aren't there more awesome pictures of jin like wtf that's not right-
  • Me: *dreaming*
  • Namjoon: i posted a kimdaily today and you didn't notice tf is wrong with you
  • Me: i'M SLEEPING
  • Namjoon: you didn't even reply in your sorry mangled KOREAN
  • Me:
  • Namjoon:
  • Hoseok: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
  • Me: wait you actually read those-
  • Namjoon: i was guessing that's what you do?
  • BTS:
  • Me: that's not gonna work again
  • Jungkook: why don't you notice me more i was creeping around hoseok in the last bangtan bomb OvO
  • Me: wHY YOU GOTTA BE SO PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE HUH
  • Jungkook: I WAS JUST STARTING TO OPEN UP TO YOU
  • Jimin: HOW COULD YOU
  • Jin: do you find tae suga jimin and namjoon more handsome than me? admit it the reason why you don't reblog me as much is because it takes you loner to find a "handsome" picture of me
  • Me: NO I JUST DON'T ALWAYS THINK YOU'RE AS PHOTOGENIC?
  • Jin: what
  • Jungkook: pardon
  • Me: I LIKE YOUR AIRPORT FASHION BETTER AND WHEN YOU'RE BEING NATURAL I JUST
  • Jimin: omg! why would you make them feel left out like that i thought you loved all of us i'm crying omg leave me alone
  • Me: don't cry you'll get dehydrated i know how you are about drinking wa-
  • Jimin:
  • Me:
  • BTS:
  • Me: YOU'RE JUST SO hiGH MAINTENANCE WHY DO YOU TAKE SO MUCH TIME FOR WORRYING HUH
  • Jimin: I'VE MAD THE FANS SAD IT'S ALL MY FAULT I'LL TRY HARDER
  • Me: FU-
  • Tae: wow you obviously find me the most handsome??? wtf
  • Me: THAT DOESN'T MEAN I LIKE YOU THE MOST
  • Tae:
  • Tae: you obviously find me the most funny??? wtf
  • Me: funny?
  • Tae:
  • Tae: excuse me
  • Me: anyway YES I FIND SOME OF YOU MORE CONSISTENTLY ATTRACTIVE BUT
  • Yoongi: i think you mean me, tae
  • Jimin: OMG STOP *sob* FIHTHTIGNG *sob* I HAVE TO PROTECT *breath* EVERYONE THIS IS MY FAULT
  • Tae: LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO JIMIN
  • Jimin: juNGKOOK
  • Yoongi: wow if you can't love us all then jeez just pick a bias
  • Me: would you juST-
  • Hoseok: YOU ALMOST FORGOT TO ADD ME INTO THIS!!!!!!!
  • Me:
  • Me:
  • Me: stop screaming
  • Hoseok: DON'T PRETEND. YOU JUST NOW ADDED ME TO TOP!!!
  • BTS:
  • Tae: HYUNG THERE YOU ARE
  • Hoseok: i feel faint
  • Tae: *crouches down*
  • Hoseok: *sits on Tae*
  • Me:
  • Hoseok: YOU LIKE ME BETTER IN SCENARIOS DON'T YOU!!!! YOU READ FANFICS AND THAT'S THE KIND OF PERSON YOU WANT ME TO BE!!!!!! I DON'T SAY JAGIYA THAT MUCH!!!!!
  • Me: *pretends to throw something*
  • Hoseok: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
  • Hoseok: KJADFKADadGKADJGAD?!?!?!?!!?!
  • Tae: look a dog
  • Jin: OH NO TH BEE BEE QUEUE PIJA IS BURNING?!?!?!!
  • Namjoon: *trips and crushes Jin's DS*
  • Jungkook: inFIRES MAN
  • Namjoon: IT'S inSPirES!!!!!!!!
  • Jungkook: pardon
  • Yoongi: YOU FORGOT TO ADD MY PILLOW INTO YOUR DREAM WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU
  • Namjoon: mY PHONE IS NOT CHARGED
  • Jungkook: O_O
  • Me: JUNGKOOK GET AWAY FROM ME STOP CREEPING
  • Yoongi: *yanks on maknae line's leashes except jimins*
  • Jimin: *starts recording with the V app*
  • Jimin: SEND HEARTUS TO MEND MY HEARTU?!?!?!! IN DIALECT WE SAY THIS LIKE
  • Hoseok: haerTEU OH MY HAEURTO
  • Yoongi: SHIT FUCK SHIT SHIT FUCK DAMN
  • Jungkook: O_O
  • BTS: i thought you loved all of us
  • Jungkook: O_O
  • BTS: i thoUGHT YOU LOVED ALL OF US
  • Jungkook: O_O
  • BTS: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ALL OF US
  • Me: I NED U BTS WAE HONJA SARANHAGO-
  • BTS: *leaves*
  • Me: DON'T DO THIS I NEED U/PROLOGUE SHIT ON ME DON'T
  • Jungkook: O_O
  • Me: *wakes up crying in the middle of the night*
  • Phone: *OH MAN HOLY SHIT notification sound goes off*
  • Me:
  • Me: better check that

anonymous asked:

i am having a really awful week anxiety wise, and my depression has been getting worse, and i don't wanna bother you but your fics always cheer me up, so, if you have time and are up for it, do you think you could write me something extremely fluffy and cavity inducing? i'd love you forever <3 (not that i don't already!)

I am so so sorry it took me two days to reply to this, but here. Please accept my offering of de-aged, baby!Derek and true love’s kiss! I hope you are feeling better today, sweet anon, but if not I hope this goes a little way in making you smile <3

Stiles never thought he’d see the day where Derek let Kira and Erica paint his face and smile about it. Then again, he never expected to be taking care of a four year old Derek either.

Stiles thought the first Derek got de-aged was hard enough. From the moment they found him, Stiles had panicked; all the way from Mexico to when Derek had been lying unconscious on Deaton’s table, it took all his self-control not to freak out, even though he didn’t know exactly why. His heart just about stopped, however, when he saw him going out that window with Kate, and, well, if that was also the moment he realised just how much he actually cared for the asshole…it wasn’t much of a revelation anyway.  

So, all said and done, Stiles thought this time would be a much simpler affair. Derek can’t climb out any windows without someone helping him- not funny Erica. He doesn’t have to convince anyone he’s his cousin, and finally Derek doesn’t question Stiles’ authority every minute of the day. Which, you know, is nice- so nice Stiles plans to record at least some of it to tease Derek with later-  but mostly, it just makes him miss his- uh, their- Derek more. Because, well, shut up, he just likes challenging people. He doesn’t get turned on by it or anything.

He doesn’t.

The problem though, the problem with this whole damn thing, is Derek’s face is currently painted like a bunny and he’s looking at Stiles like he’s his favourite person in the whole world.

An hour ago, Derek painted Stiles a picture of the pack and put Stiles in the middle of it, a blue and orange blanket wrapped around him, before proceeding to say in the most adorable and earnest voice ever, because you deserve snuggles, ‘tiles.

Yesterday, Stiles found him crying in the kitchen, sitting on the floor all by himself, because Aslan died in the ‘Narnia’ movie Scott had put on for him. His little fingers had clutched at Stiles’ t-shirt when he asked him what was wrong, little cheeks all puffed out and red from crying, only regaining their normal colour when Stiles put him in his lap and let Derek scent him for a while.

It just about broke Stiles’ heart when Derek whispered home before falling asleep with his face buried in Stiles’ neck.

And now, because Derek is intent on killing him, Derek is tugging at his sleeve, asking Stiles if he makes a good bunny.

Keep reading

Lets Destroy It

MOVIE : NOT MOVIE
PEOPLE : THOMAS BRODIE SANGSTER X READER
RATING : SMUT AND LOTS OF IT
WRITER : WE AND MY IDEA

note : luke is the name of your boyfriend not sure why just the name i came up with at the time 

Y/N POV

i was walking home from my job i only work five minutes walk down the road from the flat i share with my boyfriend, luke as i get to our apartment block i see he’s already home as his car a range rover TD6 vogue is in the usual place i don’t have a car i don’t mind walking to town for work and shopping anything else luke does i slowly but surely get to our apartment on the 13th floor and stand just about to unlock the door when i hear the voice of a woman giggling and the voice of luke i slowly open the door and i can definitely hear voices more clearly 

“come on mary” luke says

“i don't know if we should today, y/n could be home soon” the female voice replies 

“oh who cares about her” luke replies i then walk further into our apartment to see our bedroom door is open and lights coming from it i walk to it silently and look through the opening to see some girl i don't know sat on our bed in her underwear and luke sat just beside her the two of them snogging looking like any second about to have sex i can feel the tears welling up in my eyes but i dont want to burst in and make a scene so i just go to the front door again and take his car keys and leave without making at sound i run down all 13 floors to get to the ground floor i then collapse and start crying my eyes out against the wall i don't know what to do i dont even have anywhere to go,

scratch that i do have somewhere to go i then storm out the apartment block and get in his car still crying and start driving  to the only place i know i can go i get my phone and put it on the dashboard and call up my best friend thomas i know he’s back from work at the moment as i was going to see him tomorrow anyway after three rings he answers

“hey love” he says with his always sweet sounding voice

“hey tommy, i have to ask a favour” i reply still crying

“sure what” he asks sound a bit concerned 

“can i come and stay with you tonight something’s happened with me and luke” i say crying my eyes out again 

“course you walking or driving” he asks

“driving i stole his car” i reply 

“quite the criminal aren't you love its fine i'll open on the the garage doors and you can park the car there” he says

“thanks tommy see you in a sec” i say

“see you love” he replies before hanging up i then just keep driving luckily thomas doesnt live that far away from me now i know what you're thinking how the hell do i know him simple really he was my next door neighbor growing up and i've always been friends with him i have even visited him on sets before when i get to his house its huge and he has opened one of the garage doors so i just park the car in the one that's open and get out with in seconds he’s there looking as he often does when i see him not really awake in skinny jeans and a light blue button shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows looking if in honest like a teenager but when doesnt he honestly he looks me up and down noticing im crying “what the bloody hell happened” he asks stepping closer to me  looking very worried

i don't reply just burst out crying again he just takes me in his arms and hugs me tightly so im crying on his shoulder he moves his hand up and down my back to calm me down whispering calming sweet things in my ear as well till he pulls away from me as i stop crying and he takes me into the living room a large room with bookcases of games and films everywhere he sits me on the sofa then goes off into the kitchen i just sit trying to hold back my tears till he comes back with a mug of something and puts it on the table in front of me “hot chocolate, the only truly good drink for sadness” he says making me laugh before i drink some noticing its (whatever you fave sort of hot chocolate is)

“seriously” i ask

“yeah, its always here for if this was gonna happen…..on that not what exactly has happened” he asks carefully

“i got home and found luke in the arms of some girl called mary” i say “they were sat on the bed close to snogging each others faces of when i got there and i overheard him say he didn't care if i was gonna be home he was too wrapped up in her arms to care” i say starting to cry again but thomas just hugs me tightly again 

“hey it’s okay, i bet that mary wasn't half as lovely as you” he says

“she looked pretty good from what i saw” i say still crying from what i sore though the door she was beautiful much prettier and thinner than me

“well i bet you're still better than her, and lukes and idiot if he cant see that, he must be blind to want to be fooling around with some other girl when he has you” he says to me 

“awe you always know the right things to say” i reply hugging him even tighter 

“its true thought hes an idiot to think any girl is better then you, i mean if i was your boyfriend i would be begging to get home to be with you i wouldn't even look at another girl if i had you” he says to me pulling away so he says it to my face 

“awe thank you tommy, but no one has me now luke can go fuck himself for all i care, he can go have a threesum with my boss and the queen of england and i still wouldn't care” i say trying to be all brave and stuff even though i know i don't have to be with thomas

“what you gonna do with his car though” thomas asks

“i dont know maybe dump it in a ditch and text him directions to the ditch i left it in” i say drinking some more hot chocolate 

“well if you want i have an idea” he says getting up and taking my hand dragging me back to the garage when we get there he looks around some benches and stuff he has for working on cars and bikes and gives me a huge bit f metal no clue what its for in car terms he then gets something similar “Lets Destroy It” he says

“what” i ask

“lets destroy it wreck it then dump it in a ditch on fire and tell him he wants his car its on fire at where ever we dump it” he says making me laugh 

“are you sure” i ask

“sure just don't hit me in your anger” he says

“i wont” i say fluffing his hair out its normal place something he hates me doing but because he hates it that i do it at any opportunity 

“Y/N” he complains like a child “you're worse then ava for doing that” he says

“i know well ava got it from me” i smirk walking to the side of the car and hitting the mirror right off well that felt good so i continued hitting the car smashing various things and thomas has joined me now both of us destroying his car till these not much on the outside not yet destroyed so i yell stop and sit on the bonnet a bit not completely wrecked and thomas sits beside me “you all don't destroying” he asks

“for a sec” i say a bit tired after destroying his car to this extent “did you mean that” i ask him 

“mean what” he asks

“if you were my boyfriend you wouldn't do anything like that to me” i ask

“i swear by that” he says

“i bet your girlfriend wont be happy with that, then again she doesnt like me very much does she old isabel she don't much like me, thats gonna be another argument i can see when she finds out you have allowed me to stay here and you're helping me wreck my ex’s car” i say

“well i imagine she wouldn't but it doesnt involve isabel she’s my ex now” he answers 

“when did that happen tommy and why wasn’t i informed” i ask 

“happened three weeks back y/n and you went informed simply because you were working when it happened and i didn't want to bother you” he says

“it wouldn't have been a bother tommy, i like to know these things what happened” i ask

“she left me because she doesnt like you” he says quietly 

“what” i ask

“she left me because she doesnt like you” he repeats 

“what the hell thats stupid im your bestfriend what the hell does it matter if she doesnt like me if she loves you” i ask

“loved me past tense y/n if she loved me, she doesnt like the fact i have a friend that i constantly talk to thats a girl she doesnt like she just assumes i would cheat on her at any moment” he says

“awe poor you” i say putting my arm around him “well what do you need girlfriends for tommy we're two of a kind” i say laying back on the bonnet 

“yeah we are just two kids that can't hold down lovers” he laughs laying beside me 

“yeah we are, but if i was your girlfriend i would care who your friends are if there girls, boys, rodents or ghosts there your friends and if they make you happy it would make me happy to make sure you're happy” i say 

“awe thanks love” he says turning to face me i just turn to face him two looking into his deep brown eyes a second but before i've really noticed we were both stareing at each other he leaned forward and kissed me a way i have never been kissed before a little kiss sparking butterflies, fireworks and all manner of lovely things as we moved our mouths in perfect sync with each other a while almost fully making out on the bonnet of my ex boyfriends car till we both pull away “wow” he says

“yeah wow” i reply 

“why the hell did i wait this long to do that” he says

“i dont know why i waited so long either” i reply before we both re connect our lips with much more passion than before till we both pull away again “i just wanted to say” he says

“what” i ask

“this friendship of ours Lets Destroy It” he laughs

“better Lets Destroy It and taint my ex’s car” i giggle 

“you are so a little criminal” he laughs at me 

“and proud of it” i say  as we both get of the bonnet and go into the back seats the second we both sit down we are making out again my arms around his neck his around my waist but slowly moving down to my thighs in response i begin to lay back and he just crawls on top of me fiddling with my skirt before returning to kissing me i quickly move my hands from around his neck to start undoing his shirt he moans into my mouth as i do till i completely take his shirt off of him the second i do he moves away from me and pulls my shirt of tossing it away into the front seats of the car before scanning me over with his eyes but i just pull him back to kissing me he then moves to start kissing my neck and i twist a hand in his hair as he sucks on a sweet spot on my neck and i moan as he does till his hands move to my skirt again and gently pull it off me completely adding it to the pile of our clothes on the front seats before scanning me again and reconnecting our lips and i move my hands down his chest feeling his toned chest the whole way down just pausing at the top of his jeans “what you waiting for love” he asks between kisses 

“nothing” i reply letting my hand undo his jeans and pull them down slightly revealing his boxers before i gently palm him and he moans into my mouth moving his hands to my chest feeling me even though my bra making me moan as well till i let my curious hand slip under the waistband of his boxers taking hold of him in my hand “ah fucking hell” he says in response before undoing my bra and removing it with his teeth making me laugh before he reconnects our lips yet continuing all the way down my chest to the bottom of my stomach just above my knickers  before i grip his hair pulling his lips back to mine and use my other hand to completely remove his trousers and boxers leaving him naked in front of me i can't help but sit there gobsmacked i have never seen him naked before, well i say never once after the last day of school all our friends went skinny dipping in the dark lake and we hwee amongst them but it wasn't for long and dark at the time i wasn't really paying much attention but now i am “what” he asks 

“nothing just wow” i say making him laugh before he slips his hand in my knickers and slips them off throwing them with the rest of my clothes “i could say the same to you” he says making me laugh “now are you sure” he asks me

“fucking positive tommy” i giggle he just nods before kissing me again and slowly but surely pushing into me filling me up completely almost making me scream there and then before he begins thrusting into me with as much force as possible both of us screaming and shouting for a while till i can feel my climax in the pit of my stomach and i know he’s not far off either by the noises he’s making and the fact his thrusts have gotten much slower and sloppier till i climax screaming his name at the top of my voice we are so lucky he doesnt have neighbours with in seconds he comes into me mixing our juices together  and he collapses on top of me “you think we destroyed our friendship now” he asks between his breaths

“yeah thats gone” i laugh

“what about the car” he asks

“one more thing” i say sitting up pushing him off me and moving into the front seat and he sits in the other seat i get my bag from the footwell and get a pack of cigarettes as both me and thomas smoke i take one and bass the pack to him as i get my lighter and light mine and pass him the lighter as he gives me back the pack and we both sit naked and have a smoke making the car smell of both sex and smoke “well that was brilliant in my opinion” he says

“right back at you tommy” i smirk

“so what is this” he asks

“well i don't know, whatever we both want i guess” i reply

“how about boyfriend and girlfriend” he asks

“fine with me” i answer

“how about date for dinner tomorrow night” he asks

“fine with me” i answer

“and how about you pack your stuff at lukes and come here” he asks

“fine with me” i answer leaning over to kiss him again we both then finish our smoke and get dressed again and get out the car “tomorrow we drive it into a ditch and text him where it is and while he’s out we pack your stuff up okay” he says 

“okay” i reply letting him wrap his arm around me and lead me to his room i just sleep in my underwear as i don't have any other option.

when we both get up we dress and take the car out i drive the car even though its destroyed and thomas follows me in his car so we can go to lukes and get my stuff when i find a long deserted road quiet far away and stop the car by the side of the road right next to a ditch i  get out the car and thomas gets out his car and stands with me “i say don't light it on fire actually” he says

“i agree, but can we put it it facing out so the windshield faces the road” i say

“okay” i answers 

“wait” i say just getting an idea and getting back into my ex’s car and sitting on the driver seat thomas then sits on the passenger seat to see what im doing  i get my lipstick out my bag and write on the windshield

 “i know about mary arse hole

 piss of luke 

x y/n” 

“brilliant love” he says beside me “but if i may add something” he asks so i hand him the lipstick and he writes 

“p.s. we did it on the back seat

you cheating lying bastard

x thomas”

making me laugh “brilliant tommy” i say we both then get out the car checking anything we wants out of it and pushing it into the ditch and standing on the road looking at it as he wrapped an arm around me “that is how you get back at your ex” he says we then use my phone to send an exact map reference to luke as to where is car is and a text that says pick me up on it then get back into thomas’s car and drive to my old apartment and wait till we see luke leave out for his car then rush up to the apartment and pack up all my stuff and load it into his car rushing off before luke shows up returning to thomas’s “so lukes gonna let him fuck his little mary, now i've got his y/n” he laughs hugging me

“not his y/n, your y/n now” i giggle 

“yeah” he says

“we really destroy everything don't we” i laugh

“yep” he says

Final Fantasy VII Advent Children (Complete) Starter Sentences
  • “I suppose we're no good at facing our memories”
  • “We were trying to rid ourselves of a more...immediate problem”
  • “But you're the ones who brought that on yourselves in the first place.”
  • “He's not here anymore...”
  • “ ____ called again. They say to hurry...and they sounded kind of strange. Be careful, okay?”
  • “We know you hid her, brother!”
  • “I don't want to talk to you anymore.”
  • “I'm still out here!”
  • “Good. You fight like the soldier you once claimed to be.”
  • “Just run!”
  • “Don't cry.”
  • “Now...do as I do.”
  • “You don't have a phone!?”
  • “Man, do I hate liars!”
  • “She's not here...I'm not crying!”
  • “They're kinda like cats...nine lives y'know?”
  • “She does so much for us...and we don't even know where to find her.”
  • “I swore that I would never forget. I tried. But I...”
  • “Dilly dally shilly shally.”
  • “Why is everyone calling me their Mother?”
  • “It's...flashy.”
  • “Oh, good. Looks like today, we're clockin' out early.”
  • “Son of a BITCH!”
  • “Alright, who's been touching my Materia?”
  • “That ____ is a royal pain the ass, like always.”
  • “Brother...I'm with her at last!”
  • “Tell me what you cherish most. So I can have the pleasure of taking it away.”
  • “So what if it looks hopeless?”
  • “You just don't get it at all. There's not a thing I don't cherish!”
  • “I will never be a memory.”
  • “I never blamed you. Not once.”
  • “You see...everything's alright.”
  • “I know. I'm not alone. Not anymore.”

cianary  asked:

i don't know if you take prompts atm but I found this and immediatelly think of jikook lol: "seriously if one more FUckIN person comes to me to ask for permission to ask you out I’ll-I’ll- KISS YOU IN FRONT OF THEM."can you write a drabble about this please? :D have a nice day Alison XD

jungkook stares. the boy in front of him blinks nervously at him. 

“why the fuck would you ask me if you could ask jimin out?”

“because uh… well…you’re always hanging around him and he seems to really care about what you think so…i guess…i just…”

inside, jungkook feels a hot flash of satisfaction. of course they had to ask his permission. jimin couldn’t be allowed to date just any sort of random trash. only the best for jimin, jungkook would make sure of it. which is why…

“no, you can’t date him. have a nice day.”

the second time, it’s a girl. jungkook blinks at her as she sits nervously down in front of him as he’s waiting for jimin at the library. 

“do you need something?” he asks when she doesn’t say anything, just fidgets in front of him. “you’ll need to move soon because that’s jimin’s seat.”

“i…um…what would you think of me and jimin-oppa dating?” 

jungkook’s face turns thunderous. “you’re what?”

ah, not yet, not yet,” she amends quickly and jungkook relaxes a bit. “i confessed and he said i should ask you too because you’re important to him and he wants us to get along if we’re going to – “

“you’re not going to,” jungkook says, smiling. he looks past her and waves. “jimin-hyung, over here!” turning back to her, his smile turns a bit malicious. “you can leave now. like i said, that seat’s for jimin.”

by the end of the week, the news is spreading like wildfire through the school. to date park jimin, you have to ask jeon jungkook first. 

“this is ridiculous,” jungkook says to jimin during lunch. “i’ve been asked seven times just today if they can date you.”

jimin giggles. “and you didn’t say yes to a single one?”

jungkook rolls his eyes. “of course not.” he doesn’t see the way jimin’s lips curl into a fond smile around his straw. “four of them were too ugly, two of them were too stupid, and the last one…no. you can do way better than that.”

“maybe you should lower your standards,” jimin says. “i wouldn’t mind dating someone who wasn’t doing too well in math or ate gumballs after they’ve dropped on the floor.”

“the three-second rule is scientifically proven somewhere otherwise it wouldn’t exist,” jungkook replies. “speaking of which, can you help me with my calc homework later?”

“mm.” 

“why can’t i?” 

“because i said so,” jungkook says, daring him to go on. honestly, no means no, who did this guy think he was? jimin held jungkook’s opinion in the highest esteem and that was that. if jungkook didn’t like you, you had to go. simple enough to understand, right?

apparently not to this one.

“give me a good reason.”

“i don’t have to give you anything.”

“fuck this. i’m going to ask jimin myself. i don’t understand why you have to police everyone he talks to. he doesn’t belong to you.”

“yes he does,” jungkook finds himself saying. “he’s mine and you can’t have him. no one can have him, he’s mine.”

there’s a pause. 

“oh, i see,” the guy says. “wow. what a joke you guys’ve been playing. didn’t have to put up with all this bullshit if you guys were already dating. that’s sick.”

jungkook’s face goes bright red at the insinuation “we’re not – “

“we’re not dating,” jimin says, sliding into the seat next to jungkook. “i’m single.” he turns to the guy. “so, you wanna go get coffee over the weekend?”

jungkook turns to him in shock. “hyung?” he can’t help the betrayal that seeps into his voice.

“what?” jimin turns to him, eyes dancing. “is there a reason i can’t?”

“you can’t,” jungkook says, scarily close to whining. “because…because…”

jimin flutters his eyelashes. “because i’m yours?”

jungkook freezes. “that’s…” jimin hums, taking a sip from his drink. “that’s…”

“use your words, jungkookie.” jimin looks thoughtful for a bit. “or don’t.”

and jungkook’s never been good with words anyways so he leans in and smashes his lips against jimin’s. it’s clumsy and unprepared and more teeth than anything else but it feels so, so right and they don’t even notice the guy leaving with a disgusted huff. 

when he pulls back, jungkook stares blankly at jimin, wondering at what he just did. 

he’d always been a little slow when it came to these things, jimin thinks fondly, watching as jungkook processed his impulse action. 

“you’re mine,” jungkook repeats. “mine.” 

jimin hums and sips at his drink again. “yours,” he agrees. “coffee on saturday?”

Forbidden Documentary Footage Released
  • [NOTE]: Recording has been partially edited by unknown parties.
  • Recording begins. Title is shown, "Retail Hell".
  • [NOTE]: "Retail Hell" is an episodic series of documentaries with traceable origins described as "punks dissecting wageslavery." At least five episodes were released alongside an independently published magazine dedicated to skateboarding culture. Each episode has a different host(s) who attempt to interview workers at retail chains. Hosts often vandalize storefronts and harass workers while filming.
  • Recording begins with Host and Co-Host standing beside each other in a Target parking lot.
  • Host: You already know who the fuck I am.
  • Co-Host: And I'm Helen.
  • [NOTE]: Co-Host is wearing a gas mask.
  • Host: Mark's on the camera. All together, we're the Chain Gang. Welcome to Retail Hell.
  • Cameraman: Okay, that was good. The fuck do you mean by, "you already know who I am," though? Also, the what the hell is the "Chain Gang"?
  • Host: Everyone who matters knows me, dude. I-
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host skateboarding. Cameraman can be seen in some shots, but doesn’t join them. Footage from a skate park is edited in. Skateboarding footage lasts three minutes.
  • Recording cuts to footage taken from inside of Target. Host and Co-Host are in store's toy section examining products.
  • Host: Fucking Barbie.
  • Host removes a packaged Barbie brand doll from its shelf.
  • [NOTE]: Barbie doll does not resemble any known versions ever publicly released. Its notable features are its green hair, pink skin, and purple dress.
  • Host: Come here. Look at this. Made in China.
  • Host shows bottom of package to camera. Camera zooms in on "Made in China" label.
  • Host: That's how you know your shit is bad. 100% cruelty. Do you know how the Chinese government treats their own citizens? This is sweatshop garbage, and they just shill this shit out at places like this. It's bad for you too. Probably got fucking lead in it, or something. Radioactive, or something. My mom used to buy me barbies and shit as kid. Like, I fucking hated Barbie I didn't play with them, but I was still, like, exposed. That's why I've got a third arm.
  • Cameraman: You have three arms?
  • Host: It's on my ass. No one's allowed to look at my ass so no one's ever seen it. They're going to have to recall Barbie cuz kids all over the USA start growing ass arms. No, you know what they'd do. They'd normalize it cuz that's how business works. You'll start seeing "Ass-Arm Barbie". Hey kids, it's okay that you've got an arm on your ass. Barbie does too. Hey kids, you're a mutant freak because we spray down our toys with arsenic and all the food you eat is GMOs, but it's cool. Just buy our shit or you'll look like a bigger freak than you already are.
  • Cacophony of recorded voices and songs are heard. Camera turns to Co-Host who has activated a large number of toys. Host laughs.
  • Host: Holy shit! What the fuck are you doing?
  • Recording cuts to Co-Host holding small skateboard.
  • Co-Host: It's a baby board. I was born with one of these. They had to cut an umbilical cord from each piece of hardware. The doctors didn't know what was going on. I did, but only because I'm really smart. I was only about two years old when I was born.
  • Cameraman: The fuck are you even trying to say?
  • Recording cuts to Co-Host preparing to skate down an aisle on the small skateboard.
  • Co-Host: Skate or die!
  • Co-Host skates down the aisle and knocks products off of the shelves along the way. Co-Host barely avoids hitting a customer, but falls off of her skateboard at the end of the aisle.
  • Recording cuts to Host, Co-Host, and Cameraman getting into conflict with a security guard.
  • Security: Stop filming.
  • Security attempts to grab the camera.
  • Cameraman: Don't touch my fucking property, dude.
  • Security: You need to leave now.
  • Host: We're just trying to buy a skateboard, man.
  • Security attempts to grab the camera again.
  • Cameraman: Stay the fuck away, dude.
  • Security: Leave now. We're calling the police.
  • Cameraman: You're a fake fucking cop! Don't touch me!
  • Co-Host: We were all born with no purpose! Live fast! Die Fast!
  • Co-Host rides her skateboard into a display.
  • Host: Holy fucking shit!
  • Recording cuts to Host outside interviewing a Target employee.
  • Host: How do you like your job?
  • Employee: It's a job.
  • Host: Do you get paid well?
  • Employee: Hell no. Why does she have that mask on?
  • Host: Ever wish you could do something else?
  • Employee: What is this for? Is this gonna be on TV or something.
  • Host: It's a student project.
  • Employee: Alright.
  • Host: You know, your security guy is kind of an asshole.
  • Employee: I don't know anything about him. I just work the registers.
  • Host: You know I got an arm on my ass?
  • Employee: What?
  • Recording cuts to young child speaking to Co-Host.
  • Child: Why are you wearing that mask?
  • Co-Host: Because I have to.
  • Child: You don't have to.
  • Co-Host: I do.
  • Child: Can I wear it?
  • Co-Host: No.
  • Child: What happens if you take off the mask?
  • Co-Host: I'm allergic to air, so I'll die.
  • Child: I think you should take it off anyway.
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host in line at a fast food restaurant.
  • Cashier: What can I get for you today?
  • Host: I'd like one McKiss please.
  • Cashier: Excuse me? A McKiss?
  • Host: Yes.
  • Cashier: Uhh, that's not something we have on our menu.
  • Host: Seriously? Let me show you.
  • Host embraces Co-Host who removes her mask. Host and Co-Host proceed to kiss passionately. Camera zooms in on cashier who looks confused.
  • Recording cuts to a plain white room. Camera turns to a door opening into a hallway. Co-Host shambles past door. Camera follows behind her. Co-Host walks up to a CRT television at the end of the hallway. CRT television only displays static. Co-Host kneels in front of the television and rubs her hand across the monitor, spreading blood across it.
  • Recording cuts to half an episode of the Flintstones. Any scenes indicating strife, negative emotions, or violence have been censored. Episode lasts ten minutes.
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host standing in front of a chained door. Co-Host is carrying a large strapping cutter.
  • Host: This is going to be a first in Retail Hell history. I call it, Retail Hell: Deep Cover. We're gonna sneak inside. We might see some fucked up shit. I don't know. We're definitely gonna break some stuff. Hel, you got this.
  • Co-Host attempts to cut the chains with the strapping cutter.
  • Co-Host: This is impossible.
  • Host: Put all your weight into it.
  • Co-Host: I am.
  • Host: No, like all your weight.
  • Co-Host: I don't weigh that much.
  • Cameraman: I don't think that's the right tool.
  • Host: You're not doing it right. Let me show you.
  • Host now attempts to cut the chains.
  • Host: Fuck, this is harder than it looks.
  • Cameraman: Do you guys even hear me? I'm 90% sure that's not what they use to cut chains.
  • Recording cuts to Cameraman smoking alone in a bedroom. Unknown female enters the shot and the footage ends.
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host within the backroom of a retail chain, presumably Target. Host is snapping a bolt cutter in front of the camera.
  • Host: These are the scissors of the gods!
  • Cameraman: Please be careful with those.
  • Host: This is it. This is the belly of the beast. This is the womb of capitalism... maybe not the womb, but this is where all the shit you buy goes before they put it outside on display.
  • Host picks up a box and drops it on the ground. The sound of glass breaking is heard.
  • Host: No fucking clue what was inside of that.
  • Recording cuts to Co-Host climbing backroom shelving.
  • Host: You won't do it.
  • Cameraman: This is a really stupid fucking idea.
  • Co-Host does a backflip off of the shelving and into a stack of boxes. Recording freezes before impact.
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host exploring store. Store is partially dark. Camera's flashlight is on.
  • Cameraman: Why does it smell like wires burning in here?
  • Host lights a cigarette and begins to smoke it.
  • Host: Did you get me lighting that? Looked badass as fuck, I bet.
  • Cameraman: There's nothing cool about lighting a cigarette.
  • Host: Whatever. Gonna do, like, a soliloquy. Don't stop recording.
  • Cameraman: I'm not stopping any time soon, Ms. Director.
  • Host: Okay, uhh... this store is like a fortress of exploitation. A monument to fruitless capitalism where underpaid workers are treated like shit by corporate suits and customers alike. It's... uhh... fuck.
  • Cameraman: Can't think of anything deep to say?
  • Host: Chev made it look so easy in his episode. Like, he said some real profound shit and dropped the best skate video I've ever seen at the end.
  • Cameraman: You can talk about having an arm on your ass again. That was the high point of this video so far.
  • Host: Fuck you.
  • Host blows smoke into the camera.
  • Host: Where the hell did Hel go?
  • Cameraman: I don't know.
  • Host: Like, when was the last time we even saw her?
  • Cameraman: Don't remember.
  • [NOTE]: Co-Host is seen standing next to Host throughout this entire section of the recording.
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host standing in front of a PA speaker that is leaking a clear, viscous fluid. The PA speaker emits sounds that resemble gurgling and coughing.
  • Host: Don't even know what to say about this shit. Sounds like my granddad dying or something. It's leaking. There's like a flood of this gross ass goo on the floor. It's like drool.
  • Cameraman: Touch it.
  • Host: I'm not touching that stuff. I don't touch shit if I think I'll regret it later.
  • Cameraman: You touched Lenny's dick.
  • Host: Fuck you.
  • PA speaker emits a loud screeching sound and wads of liquid shoot from it.
  • Host: The fuck?
  • Cameraman: Jesus Christ!
  • Clumps of a yellow, semi-solid substance begins to drip from the speaker. Co-Host removes her gas mask and plants herself face first against the wall under the speaker. Co-Host allows herself to be covered in the liquid and the yellow substance.
  • Host: This is the weirdest shit I've ever seen. Get up close, man. Look at this stuff.
  • Cameraman moves closer and zooms in on the substance in Co-Host's hair. Substance seems to be crawling and pulsating. Host, and Cameraman don't seem to perceive the presence of Co-Host. Co-Host rubs the yellow substance into her hair.
  • Recording cuts to blank footage. Audio is still available. Host and Cameraman are heard speaking. Sounds of other individuals are present, as well as the sound of fire crackling.
  • Cameraman: And it's completely fucked!
  • Host: So is he still dating her?
  • Cameraman: Yes, of course. Like, he's fucking desperate. He'll date any girl who gives him attention. It doesn't matter if she acts like a fucking werewolf. He's hopeless, and I'm tired of helping him.
  • Host: I feel you, though. Like, dude, even if this wasn't like his 90th time being in some shit I wouldn't help him. Dude blamed that fucked up shit on someone's dog. They're probably gonna put it down. That's fucked. That's an innocent animal. That's someone's family as far as I'm concerned. Fuck him. You gonna tell the cops or something?
  • Cameraman: Nah. I'm hoping his girlfriend just butchers him like she did that to that cat. For real, though. I don't mess with cops or feds.
  • Host: I feel you.
  • [NOTE]: □□□□□□□
  • Recording cuts to Cameraman sitting at a desk in a plain white room. Cameraman seems be unconscious, and is drooling onto his clothes. A purple carpet like substance is growing from his face. A plastic arm appears from out of the view of the camera and taps the Cameraman until he awakens. The Cameraman proceeds to vomit clumps of wires and coiled metal. Cameraman speaks, but his voice is dubbed over by a woman's voice with a slight southern accent. Cameraman seems to fade in and out of consciousness for the duration of the footage. Cameraman occasionally drools blood from his mouth.
  • Cameraman: Hello, my name is Mark. I'm a kid just like you. I love to play outside, I love learning and growing bigger everyday, but most of all I love my mommy. I like to paint. Watch me paint.
  • Plastic arms appears from out of the view of the camera, one with a green Sharpie brand marker and the other with a piece of paper. The piece of paper is placed onto the desk, and the plastic arm draws on it. Once the drawing is finished, the plastic arm lifts the paper and shows it to the camera. Drawing consists of green scribbles.
  • Cameraman: These are the big green hills where I live. Where do you live?
  • Recording is silent for thirty seconds, Cameraman seems to continue speaking however. Cameraman falls from his chair.
  • Cameraman: That sounds fun. I wish I lived there too. I like the snow. Let me show you what the big green hills look like after it snows.
  • The plastic arm moves off screen and returns with a bottle of milk which it pours onto the drawing. The hand shows the soaked drawing to the camera.
  • Cameraman: This is what the big green hills look like after it snows. Aren't they pretty? I like the snow, so I make sure to bring it with me wherever I go. Maybe, one day I will come to your town.
  • Recording cuts to the previous footage of the conflict with the security guard. Footage is dubbed over by a woman's voice with a slight southern accent. The dubber does differentiate the voices of subjects. The Host speaks in a higher pitched "girly" voice, the security guard speaks in a deeper voice, and the Cameraman speaks in the dubber's plain voice.
  • Security: I like your Camera. Let me see it.
  • Cameraman: You must ask before you can play with my camera.
  • Security: Can I play with your camera?
  • Host: Mark, please let our new friend play with your camera.
  • Cameraman: I shan't let him play with my camera. I am a bad boy, and I don't like to share.
  • Security: I'm telling my mommy and you will be in bad trouble.
  • Cameraman: Don't fucking touch me... I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I said a bad word.
  • Recording freezes once Co-Host enters the shot.
  • Recording cuts to blank footage. Audio is still available. Co-Host is heard being interrogated by an unknown individual who will be referred to as Unknown. Unknown either uses a speech synthesizer to speak or a has a natural speaking voice that sounds similar to a speech synthesizer.
  • Unknown: Why? Why? You lie.
  • Co-Host: Please, let me go.
  • Unknown: You breathe. Why lie?
  • Co-Host: Please.
  • Unknown: No. No. You lie.
  • Co-Host: I don't know what you're talking about. Please. I'm so sorry. I just want to go home.
  • Unknown: You lie. Him. You breathe. No mask. You breathe.
  • Co-Host begins to sob.
  • Unknown: Why cry? No cry. You bad. You wrong. Lie. Lie. Why lie? Why lie when breathe? No mask. No. No. You lie. Lie to boy. No.
  • Unknown's voice morphs into that of the child spoken to earlier in the recording.
  • Unknown: Why did you lie to him, bad girl. You're a big liar. You're a bad girl. Mommy's upset.
  • Recording cuts to footage of Cameraman engaging in sexual intercourse with an unknown female. Audio has been dubbed over by Unknown who repeats the statements, "no", "bad", and "don't look" throughout the entire thirty minutes of footage.
  • Recording cuts to footage of Host and Cameraman in conflict with an unknown entity. Recording has been dubbed over and replaced by dialogue spoken by a woman's voice with a slight southern accent. Unknown entity is humanoid in shape with a balloon-like head, a neon green plastic-like substance dangling from its head, and hot pink skin. Aside from large eyes drawn in "Anime" style on its face, it lacks any facial features. The entity wears a purple dress.
  • Host: Look, it's mommy.
  • Host is covered in blood and wielding an ax. Panicked, she points at the entity which is quickly pushing a shopping car full of toys towards the her and the Cameraman. Host jumps out of the way. Cameraman attempts to jump out of the way, but is hit by the shopping cart. The camera is dropped, but the unknown entity can be seen climbing on top of the Cameraman and sticking its arm into his mouth.
  • Cameraman: No, not my favorite camera. If I would have shared it this would have never happened. Now mommy is angry at me.
  • Host: Don't worry, Mark. I will save you.
  • Host hits the entity several times on its back with the ax. The entity bleeds a yellow and pink substance. Camerman crawls from under the entity, gets up, and stomps the entity's head.
  • Host: Ouch, hurting mommy hurts me.
  • Cameraman: Owie, it hurts me too!
  • Host: I think we both learned today not to hurt mommy. Hurting her hurts me more than it does her.
  • Cameraman: I don't know what that means, but I agree.
  • Host and Cameraman continue to attack the entity for the duration of the footage.
  • Recording cuts to footage of Host lying face down on the floor of a plain white room. A mannequin wearing the Co-Host's gas mask stands beside her. Bolt cutters are jammed into the mannequin's torso. An episode of the Flintstones can be heard playing in the background. Host raises her head to the camera. Her face is similar to the unknown entity's. Her head pops off and floats to the ceiling like a balloon.
  • Recording cuts to footage of a bonfire party. Host, Co-Host, and Cameraman are present and take part in different activities. A large number of unknown individuals are present as well. Audio of footage has been dubbed over by a woman's voice with a slight southern accent. Audio is significantly distorted. It is impossible to make out any words spoken.
  • [NOTE]: Co-Host does not have her gas mask in this footage.
  • [NOTE]: Audio is perfectly audible. It's just that mommy is speaking directly to me and you're not allowed to hear her.
  • Recording cuts to Co-Host stabbing the palm of her hand repeatedly with a butcher knife. Footage is in night vision and is taken in a wooded area.
  • Cameraman: You're a real fucking freak.
  • Co-Host: I know.
  • Recording cuts to Host and Co-Host sitting next to each other as they watch a bonfire burn.
  • Host: Hel, I love you.
  • It begins to snow heavily. Recording ends.
  • Recording was discovered by a user named, FriendlyHelper000, who posted a thread on the Runescape forums entitled, "This Is Why Liberalism Has Failed", which included links to the recording. Thread was quickly deleted and the user was banned. The publisher of the magazine which Retail Hell was distributed alongside claims to have no knowledge of the individuals in the recording.
  • Thank you for reading.
When You're Irritated (Kissed by the Baddest Bidder Headcanon)
  • Eisuke: Irritated. He doesn't understand why you're so upset. Even though he hasn't personally done anything to you whenever he tries to talk to you just glare and grumble a response. Eventually he just becomes concerned, it's been days now and you just seem to be even more upset. Eventually he picks a fight with you just to let you unwind. Where you shout how you don't understand why Erika always acts like she's so much better then everyone else when she can't even take care of herself. "If you're upset about something, then I want to know about it. You're my woman after all."
  • Soryu: Touched. He's never seen you this upset before. He didn't think you could get upset. Even when Inui and Samejima get annoying you always just laugh. He doesn't quite know what to do. He hesitantly sits down on the corner of the couch you're laying across, his back brushing against your feet as you refuse to move. He asks if you're alright, and you mutter something about work. He looks down at his feet while the tv flickers in front of the two of you. "I don't know what happened, but I want you to know that you're the strongest person I know, and whatever it is that happened is nothing when faced with your charector."
  • Baba: Worried. He's never seen you like this before. You haven't moved off of the sofa in your home all day since you came home. He tries to ask you what's wrong but you just shake you're head. He finds himself missing your smile. And in his desperation he brings everything you love. A new shirt, your favorite food, candy, you're favorite drink. He even brings a stuffed animal and presses it into your side. "I'm not saying you should ignore how you feel, but you won't feel better if you keep everything bottled inside."
  • Mamoru: Absent. He comes home pretty late, he's been thinking about what you made for dinner for hours. But one look at you thrown across the couch with the television flickering in the dark living room lets him know today was not a good day. On closer observation your expression startled him out the door. He comes back a few minutes later with boxes of takeout. He flips on the light only to be met with a mild glare. It seems hours of television has dulled your anger. He pushes a box of food into your hand and sits across from you. "Alright so tell me what happened, and start from the beggening too."
  • Ota: Adoring. He would pull you out of your dreary state. He pushes you into a warm bath. And he washes you hair, placing a chaste kiss on your shoulder. He just wants to make you feel better. He wants to know what's bothering you. "When something bothers you I want you to tell me about it so I can be bothered by it too. That's what it means to be a family right?"
  • -SKY