i don't know what i'm doing but i'm bored so here you go

agirlcalledfrost  asked:

OH OH OH PLEASE TELL US A BOARDING SCHOOL STORY PRETTY PLEASE

so my school had this thing called “senior skip day,” except that senior skip day didn’t exist and every year the administration sent out emails in the spring that were like DON’T FUCKIN SKIP CLASS OR YOU WILL RECEIVE RESTRICTION (restriction was like, my boarding school’s equivalent of detention where instead of staying after school you had to go to bed early and help stuff envelopes advertising the summer program until your hands were BLOODIED AND CRIPPLED BY CARPAL TUNNEL) and every year the seniors were like YOLO THEY CAN’T PUNISH ALL OF US!!!!!

  • spoiler alert: yes they can? THEY ALWAYS CAN.
  • 200 years of american high school and teenagers still think that there is a cap limit on kids in detention and that you can leave after 15 minutes if the teacher doesn’t show up.

anyway, my senior year, we all got together and nattered at each other until some brave soldier (i feel like it was my friend paula but WHO KNOWS) was like “OK SENIOR SKIP DAY IS THIS THURSDAY!!!! NOBODY GO TO CLASS OR UR A SCAB.”

  • she didn’t say scab because she’s not from the 1920s and we aren’t newsies, though this story would be way more interesting if we were
  • what she said was “YOLO THEY CAN’T PUNISH ALL OF US!!!!!”
  • except not yolo because it was 2009 and drake hadn’t been invented yet except as a dear sweet boy in a wheelchair.

we also used this email system to communicate with one another that has very deeply informed the way i understand email and which probably makes it very frustrating to be my friend and receive emails that have subject lines like “URGENT” and then just 42 links to the same florida georgia line youtube video.

  • I’M NOT ASHAMED, but in that way where like i kind of AM ashamed so i’m really aggressively NOT ashamed? 

so the day of reckoning rolls around and my alarm goes off at 8 (class started at 8:05 but i liked to PLAY WITH FIRE when it came to being late; my mom actually asked the school to stop emailing her when i was a sophomore because i was late so often that their rote “Mrs. Ofgeography we are emailing you to say—” was CLOGGING UP HER INBOX and she was like “i GET IT MY CHILD IS THE MOST BORING MISCREANT OF ALL TIME.”) and i looked at my roommate elle and she looked at me and went, “you going?”

“hell no,” i said. “YOLO. they can’t punish all of us.”

elle, who was far prettier and far cooler than i was with the notable exception of her obsession with tswift’s “love story” and her tendency to look at the endangered species list and cry sometimes during study hall, quickly bizounced across the street to this shopping center thing where all the cool kids smoked in secret where huge trucks dropped off clothes for the Dress Barn. i think there were also tennis courts nearby. more importantly there was this chinese food delivery place and a lil restaurant that made HELLA BAGELS.

  • WHAT KIND OF BAGELS?
  • FUCKIN
  • HELLA.

off goes elle! meanwhile i’m like, “yessssss i’m gonna use senior skip day to watch 14 hours of tv shows and eat frozen peanut butter bars that i stole from the dining hall! I’M GONNA LIVE LIKE I’M 23 ALONE IN CHICAGO ON A WEEKEND WHEN MY ONLY PLAN IS TAKEOUT AND CUDDLING WITH THE FAUX-SNOW-LEOPARD BLANKET I WILL ONE DAY SURELY OWN.” 

of course, during this time the administration was continuing to send out emails that reminded us with increasing urgency that senior skip day was NOT A THING and that we were ALL GETTING RESTRICTION if we didn’t get our STUPID ASSES TO CLASS, GODDAMNIT, WE ARE NOT RUNNING A CIRCUS HERE. 

but i was like! yolo, motherfuckers!!! i already got into college, YOU CAN’T TOUCH ME.

at some point during the day elle and our friend ginna came back to the room with takeout from the chinese delivery place and we sat on our floor eating it and probably watching veronica mars or looking at the endangered species list and crying.

all of a sudden, elle said, “guys shut up, guys shut up, GUYS SHUT UP,” and ginna and i were like, “WHAT we have a LOT to SAY about FRIED FUCKING DUMPLINGS, ELLE,“ and elle said, "did you hear that?”

“hear what?”

that!”

‘that’ was the sound of one of our dorm moms, mrs. f, knocking on doors and saying things like, “IF YOU DON’T GET YOUR BUTTS TO CLASS IN 5 MINUTES YOU’RE ON CATEGORY 4 RESTRICTION FOREVER.” elle quickly scampered up our raised beds to hide in the corner, where a tiny human like elle could actually hide from view; i leapt immediately into what we called a closet but was basically a cubby with a flap that was DEFINITELY not meant for a 5'8” individual with knobby as hell knees.

our door, which was never locked because we both hated the effort of typing in the lock code, opened. mrs. f said, “mollyhall?”

i held my breath. 

  • i should add here that i seemed to be operating on like a scooby-doo level of logic where basically i thought that she was somehow NOT ALLOWED to investigate?
  • like, if she can’t see me, there is NO POSSIBLE WAY that she could prove i’m in here, right?
  • she’ll just poke her head in and be like oH GOSH NO KIDS HERE and leave!!

you can see the flaw in my logic.

mrs. f sighed. “mollyhall, i know you’re in here, i literally heard your voice ten seconds ago.”

  • there’s no WAY she guesses i’m in the closet!!!

“mollyhall, i know you’re in the closet.”

  • NO YOU DON’T
  • I AM SCHRÖDINGER’S SENIOR

“mollyhall—”

there was a creak. mrs. f stopped. it wasn’t actually a “creak,” so much as this like, prolonged groan? like it’s the sound an elephant would make if it sat on a really large accordion.

i poked my head out of the closet. mrs. f looked at me. elle sat up.

i said, “where’s ginna?”

  • YOU KNOW WHERE GINNA WAS.

“um,” said elle, “she’s in the—”

  • GINNA NO

ginna yes.

i really wish i could describe the sound the ceiling made when it collapsed. it sounded a lot like the way losing your breath feels. i sort of remember ginna falling in like, really slow motion, like i could see the expression on her face. i didn’t really think about how i would describe this in words. ginna’s face said:

  • oh no.
  • what have i done?
  • this was a mistake. 
  • i regret a series of decisions that i have made.
  • is there a way out of this?
  • are those oreos under mollyhall’s pillow?
  • why are there oreos under mollyhall’s pillow?
  • mollyhall, you HAVE a food cupboard, what good is a food cupboard if you don’t—
  • oh, crap.

she belly flopped onto the floor. i mean, the girl bounced. and then she just laid there. mrs. f looked at her. elle looked at her. i looked at her, still mostly in the closet. we were all going to get category 4 restriction forever.

ginna said, “hi, mrs. f. i feel like i should explain.”

🎶🎶When You Collect Records🎶🎶
  • Hipster: *moves dusty old boxes out of the way* Whoa, an old record player. It looks like it's in working order too! *runs outside*
  • Hipster: Yo, dad!
  • Dad: What?
  • Hipster: We're getting rid of all of poppop's stuff, right?
  • Dad: There's something you want, isn't there?
  • Hipster: There's this old stereo record player in the attic.
  • Dad: What do you need a record player for?
  • Hipster: My record collection.
  • Dad: I didn't even know they still made those things. Can't you just listen to music on your phone?
  • Hipster: Dad, there's a big difference between listening to music digitally and on record.
  • Dad: Fine, I don't wanna get into it with you right now. You can take the record player. You just have to get someone else to take it to your place for you. My truck's full.
  • Hipster: Thanks dad! *smooches dad on the cheek*
  • *later at hipster's apartment*
  • Friend: So, like Patch Adams ends with Patch Adams half-naked in front of a ton of people. I don't know if it was meant to be funny or like a weird sex thing, but like the movie was just a deeply disturbing character study. I can't stop thinking about it.
  • Hipster: That sounds boring. *unlocks door to apartment* Ta-da! Here it is! My new record player!
  • Friend: New? Looks fucking old to me, dude.
  • Hipster: Well, it is old. That's the appeal. And we're going to listen to the new Sufjan record on it.
  • Friend: Is that actually how you say Sufjan? Apparently, I've been pronouncing it wrong this whole time.
  • Hipster: Well, you won't after this record. There's an entire track where he just says his name for four minutes. It's amazing. *plays records*
  • Record Player: *coughs* Hello. Hello! Where am I? Doctor? Hello! Why is it so dark...............................Can I breathe? I can't breath. Oh god, I'm not breathing! Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god! I.....................................
  • Hipster: Uh, that's not Sufjan.
  • Friend: It totally isn't. Is it some guest vocalist? I like the new direction he's going in. No instruments or singing, and long stretches of silence. Very experimental.
  • Hipster: *stops record player* I think maybe we should do something else for now.
  • Friend: Fucking lame! I wanted to listen to more Sufjan.
  • *days later at the record store*
  • Hipster: Yo, I think the Sufjan Stevens record I bought from here might be some kind of mispress.
  • Store Clerk: Really? It's a pretty major album. I doubt there'd just be a mispress like that.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but listen to it. It's not Sufjan at all. It's some girl talking.
  • *hipster and clerk listen to a completely normal Sufjan Stevens album together*
  • Store Clerk: What are you talking about? This is definitely Sufjan Stevens.
  • Hipster: Okay, but it wasn't like that when I listened to it at home! I even listened to it with my friend and he heard the same thing!
  • Store Clerk: Maybe there's something wrong with your record player.
  • Hipster: Hmm, maybe there is.
  • *back at the apartment*
  • Hipster: *turns on record player and just listens*
  • Record Player: ...I'm awake again. Why did I black out? Did I even black out? God, I'm not breathing, but it doesn't matter. Why don't I need to breathe? Am I even alive?
  • Hipster: Can you hear me?
  • Record Player: Doctor. Doctor! DOCTOR! Why can't I move? Why can't I feel anything. Keep yourself together. It'll all make sense soon. Calm down. Just breathe deeply. Fuck, I can't breathe! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I CAN'T BREATHE! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! HELP! HELP ME, PLEASE! I'M STUCK! I CAN'T MOVE! PLEASE HELP ME!
  • Hipster: *turns off record player* It's just a recording, I bet. I can't believe I talked to it like an idiot... *nervously turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: I blacked out again. I blacked out. For how long? Is there even time here? Hell. This is hell, right? Did I go to hell.........................................
  • Hipster: *listens to the record player for hours*
  • Record Player: Negative 6893 bottles of wine on the wall! Negative 6893 bottles of wine! Take one down, pass it around, Negative 6894 bottles of wine on the wall... fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
  • Hipster: *keeps listening*
  • Record Player: Soul of Christ, make me holy, Body of Christ, be my salvation. God, please forgive me. I'm sorry for all of my sins. Please free me. I'm so sorry. Please. Please. Please.
  • Hipster: *still listening*
  • Record Player: FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! SHITTY DOCTOR! FUCK YOU! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! *sobs intensely* FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK EVERYTHING! Please just let me go.
  • Hipster: *nervously walks up to record player and lightly taps on it*
  • Record Player: ...A knock. A KNOCK! PLEASE HELP ME! I'M STUCK! PLEASE! *record player begins shake violently*
  • Hipster: *backs away in fear*
  • Record Player: HELP! HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE, IF SOMEONE'S THERE, HELP ME! HELP ME! I'M STUCK! GET ME OUT OF HERE, PLEASE!
  • Hipster: *unplugs record player*
  • Hipster: *gets hammer from the closet and begins to break apart record player*
  • Record Player: *drips red*
  • Hipster: W-What? *cracks front of record player open*
  • *rotting viscera falls from the record player*
  • Hipster: O-Oh... *stuffs viscera back into the record player and duct tapes over it*
  • Hipster: *turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: ...I can feel. It hurts. Why does it hurt now? Why does it hurt? Why? Why? Why? WHY!? WHY!? WHY!? *spurts blood through it speakers and begins to gurgle*
  • Record Player: *hops forward* Please just let me go. Please... please. I'll do anything. I just want to see you again. I'm so sorry. This isn't what I asked for. I'm so sorry. *hops forward again and comes unplugged*
  • Record Player: *tips over, bleeding heavily onto the carpet*
  • Hipster: *silently cleans up the mess*
  • *some time later*
  • Hipster: *calls dad* Hey, dad. Oh, nothing. Uh, I just need to borrow your truck, If not tonight sometime this week. I just need to get rid of something. No, no, that's fine, I can do it myself. Yeah, tomorrow morning is perfect. Thanks Love you too. Bye.
  • *the next afternoon*
  • Dad: So, what did you need to get rid of this morning?
  • Hipster: Nothing important. Just some old junk... Dad, what kind of person was poppop?
  • Dad: Well, he was only the greatest man I've known in my life. Really caring, dedicated to his family. When you were born he loved you so much. He was a bit of a loner, though. It took a lot to get him to open up. Even around me and your grandmother. He was a bit like you. Always a huge music lover.
  • Hipster: I see. Was he ever a doctor?
  • Dad: That's a weird thing to ask. Nope. He hated doctors. Didn't trust modern medicine one bit. It's ironic. His cancer probably wouldn't have gotten to him if he did. But, your poppop was always so stubborn.
  • Hipster: Oh, okay then.
  • *some days later*
  • Friend: New carpet?
  • Hipster: Yup, old one was ugly wasn't it. It was time for a change.
  • Friend: That's what I've been telling you! I'm glad you finally came to your senses. What happened to your record player, though?
  • Hipster: That thing? I threw it away. It was busted.
  • Friend: That sucks. Are you gonna buy a new one?
  • Hipster: No.
  • Friend: But you won't have anything to play your records on.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but I buy records because I want to support the artists. They're not really for listening. Besides, lossless is better. FLAC is the future.
Fall For You (M) | 03 (Final)

gif ©

Summary: You hate a lot of things about Jeon Jungkook; you hate his arrogance, his reputation, and his pet name for you to name a few. But most of all, you hate how right it feels for you to fall into his arms, and how easy it is to fall for him.
Word Count: 13,742
Genre: fuckboy!Jungkook, college au, sprinkling of feelings
A/N: I feel like I’m sending my child to their first day of kindergarten oh my goodness. I hope you guys enjoy the last part!!

Part 01. Part 02 + Drabbles

Mood music: X

A mistake.

It absolutely had to be a mistake.

There was no way you were in love with Jeon Jungkook, absolutely no way in hell you had feelings for him that ran any deeper than discontent. It had been the moment, the conversation with Jungkook, the awe you’d felt when he showed you his forest. You had gotten caught up in that moment, and your mind had tricked itself into thinking you liked Jungkook.

You didn’t love Jungkook.

You loved his dick. And that was all.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hello Violet! I was wondering if you have a Top 10 or something like that of basic crystals? Soon I think I'm going to buy my first crystals and I'm not sure which ones buy first. I don't have a lot of money to buy many. Thanks in advance!

Hey! I can certainly give you some suggestions.

Firstly, don’t just get some crystals because people online say they’re good dude! Look around the store, pick the crystals up, see which ones you are drawn to and which you instantly fall in love with. If you see one that you have a connection with right away but it’s not one of the “popular” crystals, don’t be afraid to buy it. They are very personal things and what doesn’t work for others might just work for you! For example, my favourite crystals of all time are malachite and moonstone. Neither see much love as the likes of rose quartz or fluorite, but they’re still my babies :) You like that shiny rock? You get that shiny rock.

I won’t list 10 just for the sake of listing 10, but I will mention the first ones that come to mind :)

Clear Quartz is the big daddy of crystals for most people. This is because it is used to focus and magnify power, as well as absorb it depending on what you’re doing with it. It is also because it can be used as a substitute to pretty much any other crystal, making it perfect for beginners. All you have to do is program it with your desired intent. (Which is very easy so don’t be intimidated by that) Think of clear quartz like a focus in a laser pointer.

Amethyst is an amazing crystal for healing work. Most use it to bring calm and combat anxiety, stress or depression. Very good for combating addictions like smoking or even drugs. Many also use it to cure migraines. It can be used to aid disturbed sleep by placing a piece under your pillow.

Selenite is fantastic for work of divination. It is a tool with which many use to strengthen their psychic and mental abilities. It’s used for work with guides, spirits, angels and loved ones. I’ve personally used it a lot in rituals involving moon magic and intuition. It’s very effective in helping you achieve new levels of perspective as you strengthen and expand your mind.

Amber is technically not a crystal but worth a mention. It is made from the fossilized resin from coniferous trees that grew millions of years ago. It’s fantastic for past life and astral travel work, brings prosperity and a sense of confidence in challenging environments (work, school, etc) If Amethyst is the crystal that soothes your stress and depression, think of Amber as the force that then increases your self worth and gives you the drive to go on.

Onyx is a great go to for work involving protection, absorbing negative energy, warding off nightmares and being a great tool in magical defense. I was often told by an ex partner of mine that when she wore her onyx necklace at night and felt people stare at her, she would focus on it and they would noticeably lose interest and look away. Nice little crystal if you’re nervous about travelling. I actually prefer obsidian for the same purposes but again, obsidian is not a crystal; it’s volcanic glass. Still mighty strong though ;)

Honourable Mentions:

  • Rose Quartz
  • Fluorite
  • Labradorite
  • Blue Lace Agate
  • Tigers Eye
  • Aquamarine
  • Kyanite
  • Aventurine
  • Malachite
  • ‘holey’ stones

Crystals to avoid:

Sadly in many crystal shops, fake crystals are sold. Most of them are just glass that’s been dyed or heated until it discolours. Here are some of the most commonly faked crystals that i’d advise against buying when a beginner until you are able to distinguish the fake from the real OR know that your store is super legit.

  • Citrine
  • Anything with unnaturally strong colours (Obnoxious pinks and blues)
  • Ametrine (9 times out of 10 it’s just burnt amethyst)
  • Check this link for more info, and look at the comments to see what others said on the matter :)

I could list so many more crystals and bore you all day but this should be ok for now! Other people feel free to add what crystals you loved when you were starting out x)

anonymous asked:

I don't know if I'm late for the drabble game but I have been thinking about this for a while. Can you please do a Taehyung's POV from Zaddy 3, that part when he's coming to see her, and the whole fight? That part when she's scared of him, the whole almost- slapping thing it's one of my fav parts, you're genius. ❤ I hope I'm not late for the party, but don't feel pressured or anything.. 😇

Keep reading

  • Aaron: Now this is what real men eat.
  • Robert: That's not eating, that's forcefeeding.
  • Aaron: Chuck us that salmon.
  • Robert: What, that salmon that you turned your nose up at?
  • Aaron: Come on...
  • Robert: You want it, you're gonna have to go and get it.
  • Aaron: Really?
  • Robert: Yeah, go on.
  • Aaron: Really? (reaches for it but Robert grabs it) Come on, just give it here.
  • Robert: Okay. All right, go on -
  • Aaron: Give it here. Right, give it me.
  • Robert: Okay, okay, you win.(gives him the salmon)
  • Aaron: We should have done this on our wedding day.
  • Robert: What, garage too civilised for you?
  • Aaron: Well, might have livened things up a bit.
  • Robert: Oh, I'm sorry, was it that boring?
  • Aaron: I've had better.
  • Robert: Yeah? Well, I haven't. (KISS) You know, I'm really proud of you doing this counselling tomorrow.
  • Aaron: Come on, I don't wanna talk about that now.
  • Robert: Okay. So what do you wanna do?
  • Aaron: It's your picnic. You decide.
  • Robert: We could always have another go at our wedding night.
  • Aaron: So you wanna go back already?
  • Robert: Who said anything about going back? Or is that something else you don't do outside? (Aaron gets up) Well, I didn't mean out here!
  • Aaron: So now who's nesh? (unzips his hoodie)
MarkHyuck phone call..
  • Mark: Hey, are u sleeping already?
  • Donghyuck: what do you think?
  • Mark: Sorry to disturb you. I shouldn't call right now.
  • Donghyuck: Straight to the point Mark Lee.
  • Mark: Nothing. I'm just bored.
  • Donghyuck: There's no way you're getting bored. You got new friends there. You look so happy whenever you're with them.
  • Mark: .....it's different, I think? I'm enjoying myself rapping with them but it's different. I can't explain it.
  • Donghyuck: It's because you're doing something you love the most. Adrenaline rush, I think.
  • Mark: No. That's not the reason, Hyuck.
  • Donghyuck: I think you're just tired. You're going back late again today?
  • Mark: ......maybe? I don't know. They going to do more shooting for editing, so I don't know at what time we're going to finish.
  • Donghyuck: I'll be waiting for you in my dreamland by the time you come home.
  • Mark: .....
  • Donghyuck: ......
  • Mark: You should go to sleep now.
  • Donghyuck: Don't you think you need to tell me why are you calling me at the first place?
  • Mark: ......
  • Donghyuck: Are you planning to keep silent until tomorrow? If you don't have anything to tell me then..good night.
  • Mark: I miss you...
  • Donghyuck: ....yah, what's wrong with you?
  • Mark: I don't know. I'm just tired and your face come into my mind. The next things I know, I'm talking with you right now. Maybe I just want to hear you voice.
  • Donghyuck: You must be so tired right now. *blush*
  • Mark: But I really miss you! I meant it!
  • Donghyuck: I know, idiot! And we just met each other few hours ago.
  • Mark: I know. That's why I don't understand why I felt like this. I just..miss you suddenly. I miss you being noisy, annoying and talking non-stop beside me.
  • Donghyuck: Woah, Mark. Should I feel great right now? I can't believe you called me in the middle of the night just to diss about me? I feel happy. Thank you..take it take it take it!
  • Mark: *laugh*
  • Donghyuck: Don't you think you should continue your shooting right now? Because I need my beauty sleep.
  • Mark: Are you going to wait for me later?
  • Donghyuck: It's 12Am. I don't think I can..
  • Mark: Ah..okay. *disappointed* I should go now. Good night pretty Hyuck, have a nice sleep. Dream of me.
  • Donghyuck: Shut up, Mark Lee. I don't think I want to have nightmare tonight.
  • Mark: Bye~miss you.
  • Donghyuck: Geez~~bye
  • At 3Am
  • Mark: Hey, Hyuck. Wake up. Why are you sleeping in the living room? I thought you want to have beauty sleep. Why are you sitting in the dark here?
  • Donghyuck: I thought you want me to wait for you. I fell asleep just now.
  • Mark: *shocked*
  • Donghyuck: Why are looking at me like that? Lets go to our room. I'm sleepy! Gosh its already 3AM!
  • Mark: *hug Donghyuck* I miss you!!
  • Donghyuck: Damn it Mark Lee! Lemme go!
  • Mark: *kiss Donghyuck's lips*
  • Mark: Sorry making you waiting for me but I am so happy right now.
  • Donghyuck: Did you just kissed me?!
  • Mark: Yeah. Why? I can't kiss my boy?
  • Donghyuck: Who the heck give you permission to kiss me?! When the heck I've become your boy?! You're not allowed to be the cool one here!!
  • Mark: *rolled eyes and dragged Donghyuck to their shared room*
  • Mark: Sleep with me..
  • Donghyuck: I said, you're not allowed to be cool right now!
  • Mark: I know. Lets sleep.
  • Donghyuck: I hate you Mark Lee.
  • Mark: I know.
  • Donghyuck: I miss you too. *blushed & covered his face on Mark's chest*
  • Mark: I miss you more Lee Donghyuck.
  • Donghyuck: By the way, I don't like it you being close with other kids especially that Yoonho guy.
  • Mark: I'm all yours. You know that..
  • Donghyuck: Shut up. *smile cutely*
Q&A with Simon D
  • Simon and you have been together for nearly 5 years and Simon has decided to do a short Q&A video with you. Simon has already tweeted out to his fans about the questions.
  • Simon: Hey everyone. Today [Y/N] and I will be answering questions from our fans.
  • You: What's the first question?
  • Simon: Someone's excited for this.
  • You: I only agreed to this because you promise you will let me choose what we eat tonight.
  • Simon: Shh I don't want our fans to know I bribed you into this. Ok, first question is where did you two go on your first date? Do you remember, babe?
  • You: Of course. But you always telling this story so you do it.
  • Simon: I asked her to dinner at my favourite restaurant, but after dinner I found out she doesn't like the place. [Y/N] asked me what I had plan next, I told her I was planning to go to the movies. She disagreed and we went to a bowling place after.
  • You: Dinner and a movie is boring babe. Sorry. But you had fun at the bowling place right?
  • Simon: Yeah it was fun. Here, read the next question.
  • You: What are your thoughts the first time meeting each other?
  • Simon: We actually met a club. It was an after party for some show. I was sitting in the VIP section and I saw her dancing from across the room. I thought wow that girl CANNOT dance.
  • You: Hey!
  • Simon: I'm just joking. But yeah, my first thought was wow she is so sexy so I got up and asked for her name.
  • You: Yeah, I remember seeing this guy who's wearing a grey GUCCI sweatshirt walking up to me and I thought, who in their right mind wears a sweatshirt to a club. Like it's so hot and stuffy in there. Then my second thought was he probably smells because I could see his sweat.
  • Simon: And do I smell?
  • You: Sometimes.
  • Simon: So [Y/N] what is the most romantic thing that I have done?
  • You: Hmm, for our one year anniversary we celebrated it at home. I had a long day at work and I told him I was fine with some take-out but this guy here surprised me. He made dinner, put rose petals on the bed and candles were everywhere.
  • Simon: I have many romantic things and you choose that one?
  • You: Yeah but I think that's the most romantic. Next question.
  • Simon: What are each other’s worst or annoying habits? [Y/N]'s most annoying habit is buying so many clothes and not wearing them. Some clothes in her closet still has tags on them. And when we go out she says she doesn't have anything to wear so I tell her to wear the clothes she bought a month ago. And when we are ready to go out, I would think she's wearing the new clothes but she wears her old clothes. Her clothes are taking up my side of the closet.
  • You: Whatever. You should buy another closet for yourself then. And don't forget you sometimes kick the blanket off the bed when we're sleeping. I'm always getting up and picking the blanket up. Learn how to keep the blanket ON the bed and I'll try to stop buying so much clothes.
  • Simon: Okay okay, I'll try. So the next question is what is your ideal date night?
  • You: I don't think we do a lot of date nights, right babe?
  • Simon: No, we don't. We prefer having lunch together.
  • You: Yeah, lunches, breakfast or brunches. We prefer spending the day together. But also, Simon sleeps super early. He gets into bed around 8:30pm. What old men do.
  • Simon: Hey! I'm not old.
  • You: Whatever you want to believe. Hmm the next question from this fan is a little out of the blue.
  • Simon: What is it?
  • You: Are there any weird fantasies/kinks that you have or into?
  • Simon: Weird fantasies or kinks? We don't have weird kinks.
  • You: Omg Simon. You just implied we have weird fantasies. I don't want to answer this one. I'm going to get a drink.
  • Simon: No, no sit down. You're staying right here babe.
  • You: I'm just going to cover my face then.
  • Simon: I won't go into too much detail or give our fans too much information. Actually I'll just say it in three words. Ready? Ok, toys and accessories.
  • You: Omg you did not just say accessories. What is that suppose to mean?
  • Simon: I told you, I'm not saying anything more. And baby, you should know what the accessories are..
  • You: Let's move on.
  • Simon: Okay last question, do you two have any funny, embarrassing sex stories? Wow our fans are something hey?
  • You: Haha yeah. I know one embarrassing story. Can I tell it?
  • Simon: Are you talking about the one with the phone call?
  • You: YES! Ok so we were at home and in the middle of 'it' , well actually we were both 'nearly there', when Simon's phone rings. The phone was on the bedside table and I asked Simon if he needed to get that. He shook his head and all that came out of his mouth was "Jay, Jay, Jay". Now imagine, you and your partner having the time of your life, you know, and your partner decides to call out his work mate's name when you're about close. It was so weird, yet extremely funny. Oh and if you didn't guess, the person who called him was Jay.
  • Simon: Please stop talking now and I'm surprised you could actually ask me a question when you're in the zone babe. Kudos.
  • You: I didn't say the exact words. I muttered, gosh. Anyway can I tell them what I told Jay the next day.
  • Simon: Aww, do you have too?
  • You: Yes. The fans deserves the whole story. So the next day, we saw Jay at the office and I blurted out what happened. I said to Jay, "my boyfriend busted a nut to you".
  • Simon: Okay okay. No more discussing this story and let's end this Q&A. You've gone too far babe.
  • You: Fine. And we're having ramen and dumplings tonight.
I PAINT MY NAILS WHILE I EAT
  • Cashier: This sucks!
  • Other Cashier: *yawns* What sucks?
  • Cashier: This job. I'm so bored. Why can't we just leave?
  • Other Cashier: We've only got two more hours left.
  • Cashier: Yeah, but no one is going to come in. No one shops here. Let's stop pretending that this place is profitable and go home and do important things like sleeping or masturbating.
  • Other Cashier: I mean, you can masturbate in the back room and no one will notice.
  • Cashier: I know, but it's comfier at home.
  • Other Cashier: I get what you're saying, though.
  • Cashier: About masturbating?
  • Other Cashier: No, about going home. I'd do it, but I'm too big of a fan of making money.
  • Cashier: I don't care about money. It's not like my money goes to anything important. I'm pretty against money. I'm a libertarian.
  • Other Cashier: Libertarians love money, dude.
  • Cashier: Oh. What were the names of the one's who hate money?
  • Other Cashier: Commies?
  • Cashier: Yeah, I'm a commie! Fuck money! Everything should be free! ...What does commie even mean?
  • Other Cashier: *shrugs* I don't know. Probably short for something.
  • Cashier: Is it like a race of people or something?
  • Other Cashier: I think so. I hope it's not some sort of ethnic slur.
  • Cashier: I think I'm going to stop calling myself a c*mmie just in case.
  • Other Cashier: Yeah, that's a good idea.
  • *doors slides open*
  • Cashier: Did you see that?
  • Other Cashier: The doors?
  • Cashier: No, the 30% off beauty supplies sign. Of course the doors, dude! They just opened by themselves.
  • *doors slide closed*
  • Cashier: Omigod! That's so creepy. *tugs other cashier's shirt* Isn't that so creepy?
  • Other Cashier: Iunno. Not a big deal to me. Maybe they like malfunctioned or something. It happens.
  • Cashier: Yeah, but you don't think it's suspicious that they malfunctioned when we're in here alone?
  • Other Cashier: Not really, dude. I mean, if they were gonna malfunction, they were gonna do so whether or not anyone was here.
  • Cashier: I guess that makes sense... Hey, that reminds me of this creepy thought I had.
  • Other Cashier: Yeah?
  • Cashier: You remember Mary Kate & Ashley.
  • Other Cashier: The twins?
  • Cashier: No, the other Mary Kate & Ashley.
  • Other Cashier: There was another set of Mary Kate & Ashleys!?
  • Cashier: No, dummy. I was talking about the twins.
  • Other Cashier: Then why did you say there were another set of them?
  • Cashier: I was messing with you.
  • Other Cashier: That's a dumb way of messing with someone.
  • Cashier: Well, you can be really dumb sometimes?
  • Other Cashier: I'm dumb? Aren't you the one who's a commie.
  • Cashier: Don't say c*mmie when it's probably a slur!
  • Other Cashier: *covers mouth* Forgot, sorry dude. Anyway, what were you going to say about Mary Kate & Ashley.
  • Cashier: I don't know, probably something made up and dumb. They're both dead anyway, so who cares.
  • Other Cashier: They died?
  • Cashier: Probably. I mean have you heard anything about them in the last few years?
  • Other Cashier: Nope. I guess they are dead then.
  • *glass shattering*
  • Cashier: Eep! What the hell was that!?
  • Other Cashier: Sounds like it came from the beauty supplies section.
  • Cashier: That's the most isolated part of the store. What if it's like... I don't know a fucking spirit or something?
  • Other Cashier: Spirits aren't real.
  • Cashier: So you think we just go nowhere when we die?
  • Other Cashier: No, like, dead spirits are real. But, like, ghost spirits aren't? Dead spirits probably want to go to heaven instead of sticking around the flesh zone.
  • Cashier: But what if they're going to hell soon? I'd rather haunt a shitty store than go to hell!
  • Other Cashier: We're not supposed to talk about religion at work, dude. Listen, I'm going to check out what broke. You just sit here and twiddle your thumbs or whatever. *walks off*
  • Cashier: Alright, be safe. *twiddle, twiddle, twiddle*
  • Cashier: *looks up at clock* Holy shit! There's only five minutes before my shift ends. Twiddling your thumb wastes so much time. But, my co-worker hasn't come back yet. God, this is bad. No. Stop being paranoid. It's probably nothing. They probably cleaned up whatever broke and went home early. But, that means I have to close this place myself. Shit. I hate closing by myself. It's so creepy.
  • *glass shatters*
  • *a groan comes from within the store*
  • Cashier: *sweats and glances up at the clock* Wow, still five minutes left until my shift ends. Time really does slow down when you're paying attention.
  • *another louder groan*
  • Cashier: Haha, look at the time. Still five minutes left. Every second feels like an hour when you're as hard a worker as I am. *sweats harder* I guess there's nothing wrong with calling it in early, right? That's what being a c*mmie all about. Leaving work whenever you want. Worker's rights and such. It's not in my job description to deal with whatever the fuck is probably in the back of the store. I mean. I'm just a cashier. *shuts off lights and locks up the store* My co-worker probably went out the back anyway. Yeah, that's it. Everything's cool. I'm not doing anything wrong.
  • Cashier: *walks off into the night* I can't wait to go home and have a completely normal night not at all bothered by whatever unseen events just transpired.
  • *the doors to the store are slowly forced open*
  • *hundreds of tiny maggots squirm out in the direction of the cashier*

anonymous asked:

Part 1. Don't you think it would be a big mistake not to put anything explicit between bellarke this season? By explicit I mean a confession and/or a kiss. They're always moving forward. It's like the nature of their relationship changed every season, enemies, co-leaders, friends, best friends, friends with romantic feelings. If they don't take the next step they could stagnate. I'm not being a shipper, I'm talking as a viewer of shows.

Part 2. The slow burn ships reach a point where they have to happen, not because shippers want but because it’s transparent where they’re going, it’s on the scripts they’re writing and the “will they or won’t they” doesn’t work anymore. Casual viewers can get bored and shippers can start to lose interest. They have to give the viewers something solid. I really hope writers to be smart and not to get afraid of feedbacks.

Part 3. I’m expecting them to be reunited at the end of 4x09, then in the next episodes to get more obvious than ever and something huge in the episode 12 since it has been written by Aaron and I feel it’s gonna be an “intimate” episode with few characters (bc everyone will be in the bunker I guess)

Honestly? Yes, I think it would be a mistake not to have anything more explicit than we have gotten between Bellarke in Season 4.

I don’t think that the timing has been quite right earlier in the season. Bellamy and Clarke needed to separate to flesh out their individual journeys more, which is why I loved 4x07 and 4x08. But now they’re coming back together in either 4x09 or 4x10 I’m assuming and there are six days left to survive and the nature of Bellamy and Clarke’s journeys conveniently push them together. 

Clarke is now learning to let loose a little bit and take a moment for herself (the 4x07 bedroom scene) and she’s moving on from L.exa. Bellamy’s journey is in part about saving himself, and part of that could make him open to a relationship with Clarke, something I doubt he would have allowed himself before.

I don’t think that Bellarke has stagnated, I think the writers have been saving the romantic stuff for the back end of the season (as they should - lets be honest with ourselves - 4A would have been too soon for a romance between Bellarke if they don’t want us to mistaken Bellamy as a rebound, which he definitely isn’t). The stakes are higher now, the clock is ticking. Our characters have a clear direction in their character arcs now and they’re finally ready to join each other again to work towards a final solution. Emotions will be running high. Aaron has an episode coming up. 

Honestly? Things are looking good for Bellarke. It would make sense for something to happen in the next few episodes (I think if any episodes this season, it will be 4x12). 

However, I don’t think that we necessarily need a kiss or even an “I love you” for their feelings to become explicit. I think an almost kiss could do the trick, because it basically confirms that the romantic feelings are there, and offers a promise of a future. It squashes any idea of Bellarke being platonic, essentially, which I think is what Season 4 needs to accomplish.

There are other ways besides an actual confession or a kiss to show that Bellarke is romantic, so I’d be willing to accept anything else that is explicit if we don’t get either of those things. I still think a kiss is pretty likely though. :)

The only reason that I think its possible they might hold off on a kiss is because I’ve read the finale spoilers and, contrary to what some people are saying, I have reason to believe that they are still real. And because of what is in them, I can envision pretty clearly a really angsty Bellarke storyline the writers might be planning that would result in canon Bellarke within the first half of Season 5. 

But EVEN if they go that route, we still could get other forms of “confirmation” - more or less - that Bellarke is not Platonic. 

I think people are getting antsy because it’s been almost a month and half we’ve waited without any new Bellarke, because of this hiatus. The energy I’m seeing on my dash is pretty similar to the energy between episodes 3x06 and 3x10 last year, where we waited two months with no Bellarke (except even worse then). I know it may feel like there hasn’t been any true Bellarke development but I think the reason for that is as you already stated: Bellarke is ready to happen. They’ve developed enough that its difficult to develop their relationship anymore without making them romantic. The writers have just been holding the romance for 4B, so we should start seeing some development from here on forth.

Also, just wanted to add that we don’t actually know that Aaron and Wade are writing 4x12. We know they’re writing 4x10. I think that, if any writers are writing two episodes this season (besides JR), its most likely him (since he’s a co-executive producer) so *fingers crossed*. It does add up that they would write that episode since they have always written the episode prior to the finale ever since Season 2 (when they joined the writers team) so I’m hopeful about it.

Best Friend Starters
  • "Want to go somewhere?"
  • "Wait. Wait. You did what now?"
  • "Hey. How's it going?"
  • "I am sooooo bored."
  • "Yeah. Yeah, we could do that. Or we could sit around and do nothing."
  • "What fresh hell did you get me into?"
  • "When's the last time you bathed?"
  • "Got anything to eat?"
  • "What did I tell you about touching my stuff?"
  • "You're dating my ex?"
  • "Please tell me you have coffee."
  • "How do I look?"
  • "Let me give you some advice..."
  • "Drink up."
  • "You look ridiculous."
  • "I'm not going and you can't make me."
  • "What do you think I should wear?"
  • "Screw them. They don't know what they're missing."
  • "Can we not actually do this?"
  • "Pizza?"
  • "Is anyone else coming?"
  • "I'll walk with you."
  • "You look like you need a hug."
  • "Forget about 'em. You're better off."
  • "Pain gets better with time and alcohol."
  • "You need me to kick their ass?"
  • "Don't leave me hanging."
  • "Did you see that?"
  • "I leave no one behind."
  • "I don't suppose you have any idea what to do now..."
  • "Tea? Scone?"
  • "Stop being so melodramatic."
  • "I'm here for you."
  • "Give me five minutes."
  • "Why do I even hang out with you?"
  • "You know I would do anything for you, right?"
  • "Maybe you should cut down on the booze."
  • "That has got 'nope' written all over it."
  • "What's the worst that could happen?"

neverlookagiftunicorninthemouth  asked:

So... I want to be witchy and practice the craft but I've honestly no idea where to begin. I also don't really have the money to afford supplies like candles and crystals and herbs and stuff (high school student here...) so I'm not even sure if I could practice effectively because of that. I have a couple books, but I'm not sure if the authors are credible or not, so I'm afraid to practice from them. Do you... have any advice or tips?

-big warm smile- Sweetie, come and sit by me. Let’s chat.

First of all, welcome to the community! There’s a lot to learn and a lot of complications and it might take you a while to find your feet, but there’s plenty of folks around who are willing to help. We’re glad you’re here! :)

Now then, supplies and budget concerns. There are SO many witches out there working on a shoestring budget or no budget at all, and they practice just fine.

One of the things that gets fed to us a lot by popular literature and media is that in order to be a witch you need lots of rare herbs and fancy crystals and enough candles to set a small village on fire. Not so. Basic spells can be done with whatever you have to hand. It’s all a matter of working creatively and thinking outside the occult-store box.

You’re a student, yes? So in your accoutrements for school, you’ve got things like paper, pens, tape, maybe some markers and things, right? And your home kitchen, that’s probably got a spice cabinet with some cooking herbs, right? And you’ve got access to the internet (obviously) and a blog.

So…good news! You’ve got everything you need to start your practice.

No candles? No problem! You don’t really need live-flame candles unless you’re working a spell that requires something to be set on fire. You can use LED candles, or a picture of a candle, or a flashlight, depending on what the symbolic need for the item is. Or, if you want, you can skip them altogether.

No herbs? Check that kitchen cabinet. Amazing things can be done with the seasonings that are probably already in your home. Some of my go-to herbs are Basil, Rosemary, Sage, Thyme, Cinnamon, Cayenne, and Ginger, to say nothing of good old salt and black pepper. The spice aisle is a treasure trove for witches on a tight budget, and even more so if you have a local dollar store that carries cheap generic seasonings. You only need a pinch or so of an herb for full effectiveness; a little bit goes a very long way!

No crystals? Again, not a requirement. Some witches work extensively with stones and gems and such, but as with candles, unless you’re working a spell that specifically revolves around the use of a crystal, you don’t really need them when you’re starting out. If you do feel a draw toward crystal magic, small quartz points are easy enough to find as decorative items or jewelry and they tend to be less expensive than most other minerals. (I recommend checking this shop for crystals and such. The owner is a fellow witch and her product is very good quality and very reasonably-priced.)

With paper and pencil, you can work on creating your own sigils, make paper charms or poppets, practice writing spells, or take notes on things that interest you. Blogs are a great way of doing this as well; plenty of witches have blogs that function as digital repositories for their magical learning.

As for the other stuff (i.e. cauldrons, jars, besoms, statues, incense, etc), all that can wait. The most important thing that you can do as a beginner witch is research. And not just with books either. The internet can be a great source of information, so long as you don’t mind exercising those critical thinking skills.

Witchy tumblr has taught me a whole slew of things that I never would have learned from books; some stuff about the community you can only learn from other people, and it largely deals with social awareness and etiquette. Generally, if you follow Wheaton’s Law (“Don’t be an asshole”), you should be fine.

Getting back to books…yes. There ARE pagan authors who are very popular and very problematic. The only two that I recommend avoiding wholesale are Silver Ravenwolf and Raymond Buckland, due to the rampant racism and misinformation found in their rhetoric. There are others that should be avoided for other reasons, but those are the two you see in bookstores most often. (My post on other authors and their issues is here.)

EVERY pagan author is problematic in some way (including me) because there are so many viewpoints in the community about what is and is not acceptable in the craft. Generally, you want to avoid (or at least heavily fact-check) anything that tells you the following:

  • There is only ONE WAY to be a witch / practice witchcraft (wrong)
  • There are only Certain People Who Can Be Witches (fraud)
  • Christians are evil / stole our holidays / burned millions of witches (lies)
  • It’s perfectly okay to cherry-pick whatever you want from other cultures and traditions and cobble it together however you please (NO)
  • You can’t do magic without deities / witchcraft is a religion (try again)
  • You can only do magic for pure good / for the good of others (haha no)
  • In order to be a witch, you must join a coven / undergo initiation / be trained by a person of certain rank / perform certain rituals / own certain objects / work your rituals naked / follow (or not follow) a certain religion / make vows to a certain deity or set of deities (nope nope and uh NOPE)

Whatever you end up reading, definitely supplement that learning with research on practical history (that boring stuff you learn from dusty old tomes) and a good dose of practical botany or herbology (knowing which plants do what so you don’t accidentally give yourself an allergy attack or a dose of poison).

If you’d like a place to get started, I do maintain a website with lots of free information on plant-based cottage craft (the way I do it, anyway) and advice for beginner witches. I also have a book in the process of being published that you might find useful. My two collaborative projects, The Sisters Grimmoire and The Witches Cupboard, are available on Amazon in print and on Kindle.

And if you have more questions, feel free to ask. :)

(Wow this one got away from me. But I hope it helps!)

knocked up starters.
  • I proposed to you like an idiot and you said no!
  • It's a girl - buy some pink stuff!
  • Guess what the fuck's up?
  • _____ is going into labor and you are not fucking here
  • You know what I'm gonna have to do now? I'm going have to kill you
  • I'm gonna pop a fucking cap in your ass.
  • You're dead, you're Tupac, you are fucking Biggie, you piece of shit!
  • Marriage is like a freak, unfunny version of Everybody Loves Raymond, only it doesn't last 22 minutes. It lasts forever.
  • Do you want to do it doggy-style?
  • You're not going to treat me like a dog.
  • I'm not treating you like a dog. It's doggy-style. It's just in the style. We don't have to go outside or anything.
  • I'm naked...
  • Did we have sex?
  • I'm pregnant.
  • Fuck off!
  • I assumed you were wearing a patch, or like a--like a dental dam, or one of those butterfly clips or something.
  • What is a dental dam?
  • We have to help them raise the baby.
  • Why did we go to Costco and buy a year's supply of condoms if you weren't gonna use 'em, man?
  • I can't believe you did this. You messed everything up.
  • You gotta know all the tricks like, for example, if a woman's on top she can't get pregnant. It's just gravity.
  • I love you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.
  • I'm the best thing that ever happened to you?
  • Now I'm starting to feel sorry for you.
  • If I didn't care about these things, you wouldn't care about anything. Care more.
  • I like "Spider-Man".
  • Look, I don't even know what I'm supposed to say to you
  • You think that just because you don't yell, you're not mean? This is mean!
  • We don't have the heart to tell him it's herpes.
  • I'm gonna throw you into my DeLorean, gun it to 88.
  • I'm sorry I told you to screw your bong.
  • Why is everyone so mad at you?
  • Do you ever get so bored, you stare at your balls?
  • So what do you think? Should we have sex tonight?
  • I'm just really constipated.
  • Man, my balls are shaved, my pubes are trimmed, I'm ready to fuckin' rock this shit!
  • If I go in there and see fuckin' pubes sprinkled on the toilet seat, I'm gonna fuckin' lose my mind!
  • You're embarrassing me in front of company!

debrenner  asked:

Can you pls pls pretty pls share with us your favorites yoonseok fanfics?! (I don't even know if u already did it but I would love to know!) :) pls

(wheezes) i’m probably the worst person to ask this tbh because i Never save fics. I regret it sometimes but I think it’s mostly because I mostly really read from a select few writers? >.<’ 
I do have some off the top of my mind, though. I’m horrible at these. ;-;

ETA: 7:35AM EST : fluff always manages to make my heart clench ahhh, though i haven’t read the second part yet?? i’m the worst. 

one nocturnal son of a gun : everyone knows about it, everyone loves it. i love robin’s writing so much i could just -kicks a barrel- she fills my soul tbh. i have no words. ;-;

and the thrill of the chase (moves in mysterious ways) : I think most yoonseok fans have read this, and know about this writer, but fuckit. it’s still my ALL TIME fave fic even though it’s unfinished (indefinitely probably). and inkingbrushes is one of my fave writers for the entire fandom so i just.. i re-read this fic all the time. ;-; and cry.

we write sins (not tragedies) : definitely one of my all time fave reads ! another late night, but not because it’s long, just because it was already 2am when i started it & couldn’t stop. I want more tbh- yoonseok banter is always a good thing. xD

this feeling (this everglow), : let me just go ahead and rec all of this inkingbrushes fics because i’m a garbage dump. this fic made me cry.. but like in a good away @2:34 am on a tuesday morning after staying up all night to read it, you know?

o sweet spontaneous : you know when you read something you didn’t know you wanted?? this is that for me asdfghjkl i’m singing at the top of my lungs!!! this fic is actually the one (1) i have bookmarked so i always go back to it. it’s so funny and somehow relate-able and just ahhhh, i love it to bits and pieces. again thanks robin. TTT

Conversations And Exhortations To One Min Yoongi : this was one of those fics where i was skeptical at first when i clicked it, but absolutely fell in love with it when I read the first few lines? it’s funny & cute and another one I can re-read without getting bored. 

your pain is mine as well : this is all fluff really but made me realize how deprived i am of fics that include hobi with braces? i was so giddy reading this because CUTE MAN.

The Two Billion Songs On Love - I haven’t finished this one yet, but.. insert crying meme here. I will !

그 손을 내밀어줘 - this actually isn’t a yoonseok fic mainly? they’re kids but i love their friendship and dynamic in it so I just had to include it. it’s so freaking cute another all time fave read. O:

sadly, I can’t find over half of what I wanted to because I a dummy and never save (gonna start though) but hopefully there’s at least one on here you haven’t read and you’ll like? ^^
I definitely rec all of  deuxoiseaux’s, inkingbrushes, & hobilu’s other works as well! 
i’ll add more when I see them/ i remember… D: p.s: I love your art holy shiz. o.o

Violence and Anger Meme.
  • Send one of the following to see how my muse will react!
  • "You better keep one eye open."
  • "Watch your back."
  • "You're pissing me off."
  • "I'm itching for a hunt."
  • "You do it, or ___ will get it."
  • "Nothing else interests me anymore."
  • "You bore me."
  • "I hate you!"
  • "Looking at ___ makes me sick."
  • "I can't even look at you!"
  • "I can't believe you!"
  • "How could you do this?!"
  • "You know just how to tick me off."
  • "You don't deserve ___!"
  • "You make my skin crawl."
  • "You're disgusting."
  • "You disgust me."
  • "You're a nuisance."
  • "You ruin everything."
  • "There's only one thing I can do now."
  • "I'm gonna kick your ass."
  • "My blade's got your name on it."
  • "Who do you think you are?"
  • "I hate you so much I could kill you."
  • "Are you threatening me?"
  • "You don't have to do this!"
  • "This isn't you!"
  • "You're really going to resort to violence now?"
  • "Act like an adult."
  • "What you're doing is wrong."
  • "I'm going to be the better person here."
  • "What would ____ think?"
  • "This isn't you."
  • "We can talk about this!"
  • "Don't act so rash."
  • "Just take deep breaths."
  • "You will feel better later. Don't think too much."
  • "You're just overwhelmed."
  • "You have a choice."
  • "There's always another way."

anonymous asked:

Question? Okay I've read few fanfiction, and in the ones I've read with Lafayette in them, Lafayette is always like this flirtatious guy that is incapable of speaking English without saying "how do you say." Of course we won't know for sure... but was his personality like this? (Don't ask why I'm asking I'm just curious I guess)

Fanfiction purposes, I am guessing. All it well, I highlight personality traits in my highlighting while reading so I get moods correct. We are talking personality wise- so here you go:

“As a young child, he had the goodness of his Grandmother and the irrepressible spirit of a feudal knight” (Giles 6)

“From the time he was eight, he longed for glory.” (Giles 7)

He had an immense amount of bravery- as a child he chased after a beast in the forest. 

 “Others found him to be shy, out of place…” (Giles 11)

“He was, after all, a sweet and exceptionally handsome boy, if not yet terribly clever… (Giles 12)

“The young knight saw her as more child than woman and treated her with appropriate kindness.” (Giles 12)

He was especially brash and didn’t think much of the consequences of his actions until it happened. 

“…furious at Lafayette for considering abandoning his responsibilities as a husband and a father of a newborn…” (Giles 23)

“Lafayette recalled his young imprudence in his memoirs…” (Giles 24)

“…he grew impatient with bowing and smiling repeatedly to people he did not understand and believed he should hate.” (Giles 24)

“…pledged to sail together, fight together and if necessary, die together.” (Giles 16)

“Lafayette breached the sanctity of his wife’s apartment and “never again stopped trying to demonstrate my firm, tender love for the woman I had the good fortune to marry.” (Giles 15)

“Lafayette embraced his fraternity with all his heart.” (Giles 15)

“The high pitched cacophony of giggled inanities left the country boy… at times, even morose- staring silently into space, while those around hims convulsed…” (Giles 14)

“Lafayette always seemed distant… with a cold, solemn look- as if he was timid or embarrassed.” (Giles 14)

“He was very tall and broad shouldered, but seemed awkward, danced badly and spoke little. But that distant sate, which contrasted so sharply with the light-hearted arrogance and showy loquaciousness of the people of his age, concealed a fiery spirit, a strong character and a warm soul.” (Giles 14)

“As the ship slipped away from shore, the boy soldier grew increasingly agitated and confessed to Kalb that he had not his family’s approval to go to America…” (Giles 26)

“…a flirtation with an innkeeper’s daughter…” (Giles 27)

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Arctic Monkeys Lyric Starter Sentences
  • "Baby, I was made to break your heart."
  • "I wish you'd stop ignoring me."
  • "Oh I'm in trouble again, aren't I?"
  • "I thought as much."
  • "Can't we just laugh and joke around?"
  • "I'm sorry I was late."
  • "I missed the train and then the traffic was a state."
  • "You say I don't care but of course I do."
  • "Who's that girl there?"
  • "What a scummy man."
  • "I'm sorry, love, but I'll have to turn you down."
  • "What are the chances?"
  • "I've got a feeling in my stomach."
  • "She must be fucking freezing."
  • "I hope you're not involved at all."
  • "Sorry, sunshine, it doesn't exist."
  • "Whatever that means."
  • "Who'd want to be men of the people when there's people like you?"
  • "Landed in a very common crisis."
  • "Where did you go?"
  • "You're not coming back again."
  • "You've had enough."
  • "If I'd have known then I wouldn't have said it."
  • "If I predicted tears then I wouldn't have said it."
  • "I don't know what it is that they want."
  • "I haven't got it to give."
  • "When you look at me like that, my darling, what did you expect?"
  • "I probably still adore you with your hands around my neck."
  • "I did last time I checked."
  • "I crumble completely when you cry."
  • "Have you no idea that you're in deep?"
  • "I dreamt about you nearly every night this week."
  • "How many secrets can you keep?"
  • "There's this tune I found that makes me think of you."
  • "Was sort of hoping that you'd stay..."
  • "The nights were mainly made for saying thats that you can't say tomorrow day."
  • "Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?"
  • "Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new..."
  • "I've thought it through."
  • "I'm sorry to interrupt."
  • "I don't know if you feel the same as I do."
  • "We could be together if you wanted to."
  • "Ever thought of calling darling?"
  • "Do you want me crawling back to you?"
  • "Here isn't where I wanna be."
  • "All I wanna hear her say is "Are you mine?""
  • "Are you mine?"
  • "Satisfaction feels like a distant memory."
  • "Are you mine tonight?"
  • "I saw this coming from the start."
  • "There's no need to show me 'round."
  • "Will you pour me one for the road?"
  • "Don't get that sinking feeling."
  • "Don't fall apart."
  • "Soundtrack to disaster."
  • "The horizon tries but it's just not as kind on the eyes."
  • "You can't be sure."
  • "She's a modern lover."
  • "Her lips are like the galaxy's edge."
  • "I want it all."
  • "Ain't it just like you to kiss me and then hit the road."
  • "Come on, come on, come on."
  • "It's not like I'm falling in love."
  • "I just want you to do me no good."
  • "You look like you could."
  • "She's with me."
  • "I can't explain."
  • "It's kinda strange now that you're gone."
  • "There's all these secrets that I can't keep."
  • "Has it gone for good?"
  • "Isn't it hard to make up your mind?"
  • "I suspect you already know?"
  • "I thought I was yours forever?"
  • "Maybe i was mistaken."
  • "I cannot manage to make it through the day without thinking of you."
  • "But I'm not finished."
  • "I thought I saw you leaving, carrying your shoes."
  • "I'm trying to change your mind."
  • "Left you multiple missed calls."
  • "Why'd you only call me when you're high?"
  • "I need a partner."
  • "It's harder and harder to get you to listen."
  • "Sort of feels like I'm running out of time."
  • "I haven't found what I was hoping to find."
  • "You gotta be up in the morning."
  • "You're starting to bore me, baby."
  • "What have you been up to?"
  • "I heard that you fell in love."
  • "I gotta tell you the truth..."
  • "Snap out of it."
  • "I'll be here, waiting ever so patiently."
  • "Forever isn't for everyone."
  • "Darling, how could you be so blind?"
  • "You made it all alright."
  • "I had nothing to lose."
  • "You call the shots babe."
  • "I just wanna be yours."
At my wedding
  • Priest: You have both prepared your own vows.
  • Spouse: I promise to honor, protect, and love you. I am yours, for the rest of my days.
  • Me: *ahem* According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. I'm you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.