I’ll never be able to move on as long as the air between us still lingers with the possibility of a future. I’ll never be able to look for a new happiness if there’s even a chance it might be standing right in front of me.
okay, it took me a while to write everything down, but here are my thoughts and reactions to the last 19 days chapter!! (an alternative title for this could be ‘how to make people regret asking about your thoughts’)
anyway, it’s been pretty hard for me to put some order to my thoughts, because im just!!!!!!! so in love with this chapter!!!!!!!! it’s been a whole day and im still such a mess, there are noises coming out of my mouth but they’re not human, and i can’t find the right words to express how i feel because this update wAS TOO MUCH FOR MY POOR HEART
i think this might be my favorite tianshan chapter, tho it’s a very close tie with chapter 185, and im afraid i’ve been kinda all over the place, but hopefully it makes sense!! (putting this under a cut because it’s really long and there are some pictures)
I am so pissed about "conventional" marriages and shit that if you don't propose to me with a fucking ring pop I'm gonna say no and dance on your broken heart until you're punk enough to get it right
I don't know? Red?
RED ISN'T A FLAVOR!
I don't care! I want red! This wasn't even about ring pop colors! This about how much I hate hate traditions and people who insist they matter over everything else!
WHERE IS YOUR PROOF!
THAT RED IS A FLAVOUR!
I DONT KNOW THE FUCKING FLAVORS OF A FUCKING RING POP. ITS RED
I am seeing a steady shift in the fandom with a few antis coming out saying they want to up and stop being antis but they’re too afraid to leave. And you know what? That’s the most horrific thing about the vld anti community. People siding with them out of fear.
I was just watching a documentary about the formation of the solar system (DON’T MOCK ME I’M A NERD) where they used ice skaters to represent all the planets and asteroids. Why did they do that?? I’m not completely sure. What I do know is that there was definitely an ice show after the Sochi GPF where the theme was “the solar system,” and it was the worst ice show of Yuuri’s life.
“Viktor is Jupiter,” everyone agrees, which is partially because Jupiter is the biggest and best but mostly because Viktor’s forehead could definitely get moons to orbit it.
“Who has the hips to be Saturn and rotate these hula-hoop rings?” The producer asks.
“Katsuki,” comes the unanimous chant. Yuuri doesn’t understand, but he does know that now he has to stand by Viktor Nikiforov in a ridiculous outfit. Oh my god, he thinks in abject horror, which is astoundingly exactly what Viktor is thinking as he stares and stares at Yuuri’s skintight outfit.
JJ is Uranus, for obvious reasons AND because it means he’s stuck in the outer reaches of the solar system, where he can’t accidentally offend anyone. Otabek is Neptune– but only because Yurio had a brief stint as Pluto, as it was the smallest.
“I’m a planet!” He hollers, spite-skating in circles with his chubby purple outfit on, “screw you!” Eventually Yurio becomes Mars, the red planet of the god of war, instead. Minami is tiny Mercury, and zips around the sun excitedly. Christophe takes his rightful place as Venus, named after the goddess of love, while a stone-faced Seung-Gil assumes his position as the Earth. His orbit is ridiculously precise– though he’s thrown off a bit by Sara Crispino, who has assumed her position as The Moon.
“I think Phichit should be Saturn!” Yuuri pleads.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Phichit scolds, “I’m the Sun. Look at me, and tell me I’m not the sun.” Yuuri can’t even look at him directly, he’s so bright and cheerful.
“You’re the sun,” Yuuri admits, defeated.
“Did you know,” says Viktor, skating so close the outside of his planet outfit bumps against Yuuri’s rings, “that when the Solar System was first formed Saturn SAVED Jupiter from falling into the sun, and then they did a romantic gravitational dance that helped form the rest of the system? We should do it, Yuu-ri!”
Yurio interrupts what Viktor assumes to be a beautiful moment. “Stop making stuff up just so you can put a ring on Saturn!”
“I already have rings?” Yuuri says, and with Viktor so close, has vivid flashbacks to the disaster that was Sochi. “I HAVE TO GO NOW.”
“No!” Viktor wails, “no, it’s science! You can’t go against science!” Unfortunately for Viktor, the solar system spins on. He doesn’t know that Yuuri’s whole world revolves around him– yet.
I know this probably goes without saying but Alec and Magnus as individuals are so fascinating and complex. Each with such well-rounded, real struggles and stories. They are both so strong in different ways and vulnerable in others. It would take me far too long to name all of their unique qualities that make them the amazing, fleshed out characters that they are, mostly in part thanks to the insightful performances of Matt and Harry. But the depth that they have seriously blows me away. Alone, they are some of the most interesting, flawed, intriguing characters I’ve ever seen. And the fact that they are in love with each other and compliment each other and help fill in each other’s missing pieces in this sweet, chaotic, inexplicable RIGHT-ness is so incredible and we are so lucky to have these characters in our lives.