i don't know if this has been giffed already but here have it again

Why I Have To Meet Jack

You guys may well think I’m silly for writing this post, but I’m going to anyway. I have thoughts and I need to get them out. I’m a firm believer in writing down your emotions rather than bottling them up. 

Anyway. If you’re tired of my complaining about not meeting Jack, then I won’t blame you for scrolling away from this right away. Feel free, or you can carry on reading. But not only am I saying the obstacles that are in my way, I’m also writing exactly why meeting Jack matters so much to me. I’ve broken it down so hopefully it’s easier for you guys to read.

I know I’ve posted about this a billion times before, but I feel the need to do it again. I kind of stop thinking about it, and then something reminds me again. I see gifs from PAX, I read about people meeting him. I’m happy for everyone who does, but I’m reminded that it hasn’t happened to me and maybe never will. I feel selfish for thinking this, but I can’t help it.

Just wait, it will happen, I hear you say. But that’s easier said than done, for a number of reasons. If it was just as simple as being too young to go on my own or whatever, then yes, it would only be a matter of time. But it’s not.

First of all, I can’t afford to go to conventions (particularly so if they are in another country, and I’m yet to find one in the UK that Jack goes to). I currently don’t earn, and even when I do it won’t be much - musicians often don’t earn much at first, and I’m not making anything from YouTube “yet” (I hope I will but it may never take off for all I know. I can’t rely on it).

Then there’s my current mental state. Going to a convention would be difficult thanks to my wonderful social anxiety. Just the thought of the crowds, the people around me while travelling… And I imagine that travelling, and the convention itself, would take a lot of energy - possibly too much for my depression to handle. Maybe I could push through it to meet Jack, but I don’t know; would it be worth risking putting myself under too much pressure?

And that’s not all. Oh yes, there’s more. Getting to another country is difficult for me for another reason. I can’t do it by myself. Yes, I’m 21 years old and I don’t know how to go through an airport by myself. I feel stupid. Not just because I’ve never learnt how, but also I struggle with things like that. I always have. I’m particularly brilliant at getting lost. My anxiety loves it, not.

And there’s more. Since I’ve started watching Jack, I’ve been at university/college so I haven’t had the time to go away to conventions. Once I leave here in a couple of months time (*panics*), I will be focusing a lot on YouTube, and probably having to find a job (yawn). And until I find one and have money, I can’t go even if I have the time.

This may well sound like I’m making excuses, but honestly… I’m really not. I wouldn’t. This is something I need to do in my lifetime, it’s a dream of mine. Jack is my hero. I have no reason to make any excuses. These are all genuine barriers to one of my life goals. Obstacles that feel insurmountable. And it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart to think that I may never meet the person who began to turn my life around. It breaks my heart to think that I may never get to thank him in person for what he’s done. It breaks my heart to think that I may never be able to hug him. He feels like a long distance friend - or even family, if I can say that. Jack means the world to me. More than he’ll ever know - but if I meet him, I can get closer to expressing it than I can from here.

I have thoughts about what I would do if I did meet Jack. I already know that I will make a folder or something of stuff I’ve made for him (fanart, poems, etc) and I’ll give it to him. And, of course, I’ll give him the biggest hugs he’s ever had. I’ll do my best to let him know what he means to me. I’ll tell him about how he’s inspired me and that my YouTube channel is beginning to grow thanks to him giving me the courage to make more videos. I was anxious to go on camera, but he made me brave, and now I love it immensely and want to do it for as long as possible.

Jack is not just a YouTuber to me. He’s been a counsellor when I’ve needed advice and someone to care. Jack has been a friend when I’ve felt alone, believing in me even when I didn’t anymore. He’s been a beautiful green light in the pitch black void of depression and anxiety, the hope I needed when mine was all gone. 

He’s been like an annoying older brother who makes stupid jokes to make you laugh - which means even more to me as one of my older brothers, who made me laugh a lot, is no longer with us. He’s been someone to watch playing games now that I can’t watch my brother play them anymore.

He’s been a lullaby when I couldn’t sleep, cradling me with kindness and wrapping me up in smiles and laughter. He’s been a soothing voice amongst the painful noise of life. He’s held my hand when I’ve been hurting, wiping away the tears from my eyes. He’s started to heal the cracks in my heart and mind. When I was starting to lose sight of anything good in life, having less and less reasons to smile, he showed me that things weren’t so bad after all. He taught me to genuinely smile again.

And Jack is the reason why I found this wonderful community, and have made amazing friends who have made me feel cared about. You guys have made me feel less lonely despite the isolation of social anxiety and depression. Without Jack, I probably wouldn’t know any of you exist.

Jack is my hero.

I need to meet him some day.

I have to.

anonymous asked:

I'm asking this out of curiosity, how can you just let go of a ship like captain swan? you were a hardcore captain swan shipper and you were part of their journey from the very beginning and now you barely care about them if at all. it's just I don't know i thought you were staying till the end & would even have a hard time saying goodbye to them after the show ends. sorry if this came off as rude I'm totally just curious just cuz you were so invested for years now you don't care anymore

Well, honestly, I have discussed this subject before, and tried to be straight about it, and I’m sure you didn’t mean to be rude and are genuinely curious. Still, though, it’s a bit discouraging?

I’m still here. I’m still active on tumblr, I still reblog CS gifs fairly regularly, and I know what’s going on in the show, and I’m looking forward to the wedding. I’ve made several long posts on my process of stepping back from the show and why that happened. It’s certainly not that I just “let go” overnight. It’s been going on for almost a year, and it has not in the least been easy for me. CS got me back into fandom after a long time away. I don’t need to prove my bona fides as a shipper to anyone; I’ve shipped them since 2012, been on tumblr for them and an incredibly active and prolific fandom member since 2013, written multiple novel-length fics and countless drabbles for them (and am still working on TDH, which is my second-longest project EVER behind The North Remembers), answered thousands of questions, written just as many specs and metas and spoiler and roundup posts, went to my first ever con (way out of my comfort zone!) to meet Colin, and still have many dear friends who have changed my life. I don’t ever regret any of the time I did spend on them. I have loved them for a long time and I still care. I just am engaging with it differently, and I have had to do that for several reasons.

As noted, I was super invested during season 5. SUPER. It got to the place where I was thinking about it almost every waking moment, even as I was trying to adjust to a new city and country and degree study and the ups and downs that came with that. My mood was totally dictated by spoilers or theories or how people were reacting to them or how I was going to have to hold things together during an angsty time with all the people I had to comfort/talk through the pain of the Dark Ones/Underworld arc. It took a lot out of me, to be honest. I couldn’t even enjoy the show quite the same way because I was so dependent on it all working out and the effect this had on my ability to deal with things. I’ve always been honest about my years and years of anxiety and depression and what I’ve had to do with that, and the show was something for me to focus on and to try to get me out of my head (again, during an otherwise stressful year). Honestly, that level of addiction/dependence isn’t healthy for anything, especially what is, at the end of the day, just a TV show. The s5 finale burned me the hell out after all that pain with pretty much nothing to show for it, and I struggled over the summer with the thought that I was finally having to withdraw from it in bits and pieces. I watched 6x01, but… nope. That pretty much put the lid on it that I wasn’t prepared to go back at the same level again, and probably wouldn’t be.

As noted, and as anyone who has read my fics can attest, I have no problem with angst. I love angst, even long-term and complex angst. I love serious and dark and morally challenging stories, they are some of my favorites. But as I have also said, I do have a problem when that angst results, to my view, in no measurable story progress and the endless repetition of long-played-out character arcs. I just watched CS struggle to be together for all of season 5. I don’t want to watch more of Emma Has Walls or Killian Keeps Secrets Because He’s Guilty or Oh Look, They’re Separated and Will Die. It’s just… not interesting to me. So I still love them as a ship, but I’ve almost completely disengaged from wanting or expecting canon to provide any kind of satisfying or well-thought-through fulfillment for them. I’ve written tons and tons of fics (and novels). I write all the time. I analyze things for a living. I am an English tutor and a history teacher. I’m a storyteller. I have spent a long time with these characters and coming up with and thinking through what I want to see for them. That doesn’t mean I’m Better ™ than the writers, but it also means that any effort I put in feels like way more than they are, and that’s not a fun or stimulating way to engage with a fandom.

I don’t do hate-watching, and I certainly am not about to rain on the parade of people who do still love it as much as ever (which as I have said many times, I am happy for them). So it’s just better to focus on things that I DO actively enjoy and which I find rewarding and engaging. This year has been incredibly tough for me since about last November and the Orange Nazi’s election (and before that, really). I don’t need to put my limited and valuable free time into things that are just going to drain me or make me annoyed more than I already am. Fandom, once again and though it sometimes can be anything but, is supposed to be fun. And I am trying to space out my interests and have several different places to turn to for inspiration, rather than putting all my eggs in one basket. As noted, it’s just not healthy, and I have to take care with that.

As also noted, I was truly happy about the CS engagement and I will watch their wedding and probably reblog a lot of gifs from it. But I can look at said gifs and enjoy their cute moments and feel as if I’m getting what I need to, rather than having to slog through all of season 6. And honestly, if OUAT is losing people like me – a super, SUPER dedicated fan with years of investment and high-level commitment and fandom participation and creation – it doesn’t take too much guesswork to see that it’s probably losing regular viewers like crazy as well, and that’s why the ratings have taken a nosedive. I know I’m not alone, because I know a lot of fellow fandom people who just can’t muster up the same level of investment, and we’ve all paid our dues. We don’t have to “prove” anything or get caught in the inevitable “Who’s a Real/Better Fan” drama that just makes the whole cycle even more draining. We’re just engaging how we choose to, over a fictional narrative that has meant a ton to us, but has also changed, and we have as well.

So yeah. I still care. I am still a fan. But I think it’s important to remember, as always, that fandom is a FICTIONAL space, and that the people who engage in it are real, with all the hangups and changes of interest and needs and triggers and emotional reasons that go along with that, and we only interact with each other on a very limited basis through tumblr, which is obviously not face to face and where we curate the content we want to post/focus/present. It’s not objective, and it’s fun and amazing and collaborative, but it can also provide a somewhat limited perspective of who people are, what they’re doing, and why they decide to move on from something. So yeah, that’s where I am.

:)

G dragon Scenario #30 “GD's girlfriend” REQUEST

Note: This gifs are not mine, all the credit to the owner.

“Babe… what do you think?” you asked him, walking out of the room.

“You look so beautiful” he says, almost out of breath. 

“You like it?” you look down to your dress. “Is new one?” he asked and you stare at him with a crooked smile. “What?” he says laughing. “You bought it”

He got closer, and he pressed his chest into your back. His hands start to travel from your sides to your waist, wrapping his arms around it, and whispering in your ear “Is just that it looks very different on you” he smiles, kissing your neck.

“Ji…” you said, because the sweet kiss turned into one a lot more intense “Ji yong! It’s already late” you begged. “Screw the party… let’s just stay” he said with his lips glued in your neck. “What?! No!…” you give him a poke with your elbow “…it took me three hours to get ready”

He smiles biting his lower lip. You took your purse, and you walked to the door “Are you coming?” you said turning around. Ji yong was standing in the same spot where you had let him before.

“Are you ok?” you said containing a laugh. He approached to you, and grabbed your face kissing you in your lips…

“Let’s go before I change my mind” he fixed his tie. 

You arrived to the place where the party was, a couple of minutes later. 

The place was huge, really impressive, and full with people. Nobody you know, though.

You spend the first forty minutes just greeting everyone there. It’s always fascinating to see the different reactions that people have when they meet him. Some people would act weird and awkward, other people would be shy, while other ones would act like “Is he G Dragon? he is not that awesome in person”.

But the funniest ones, are the ones who kissed his ass all the time, acting like if they were his best friend, laughing even when he wasn’t funny, and trying to please him all the time.

Ji yong was dealing with someone like that right now. It was a man around your age, good looking, but too annoying. “I knew you were coming, nobody wouldn’t miss this party!!!” he says. 

Even his tone was annoying you.

“Well, I almost missed it” Ji yong says, taking a sip of his drink. “Really?! Why?”

Jiyong looked at you and then he says “Personal reasons”

“Oh! I get it, this can be so boring and annoying” he says, and you couldn’t hold a laugh “Yeah… tell me about it” you said sarcastically and Ji yong smiled. He couldn’t believe you had done that.

But the guy didn’t even notice that, or at least doesn’t seem like it, because he was still smiling with you.

“You guys make such a perfect couple” he says and you can tell he wasn’t honest. “You think so?” you asked looking around without even caring about his answer.

Ji yong started to notice your frustration, and he doesn’t want you to punch this guy so he intervened “It was a pleasure to see you again Seung ho” he says.

“I’m Seung woo” he corrects him. “Yeah Seung woo! Sorry …”

You two walked away. 

“That’s why some people think that you’re an asshole… you can’t even remember their names” you took a sip of your drink and he just laughed.

A couple hours later, you were so bored. Ji yong had been talking with a man for so long, leaving you alone. You not angry though.

This is why he was here in the first place. This man was big in the music industry, and it’s important for Ji yong to have good connections, so you completely understand.

“Hello” a girl was talking to you.

“Oh! Hello” she totally surprised you. 

She was taller than you, with beautiful hair and perfect skin. “Come with me, I’m sure you are as bored as me” she says, starting to walking, and you followed her.

“I didn’t know GD had a girlfriend” the way she says GD, is already upsetting. You didn’t answer, you just smiled. “You are really pretty…” she smiles “…he really likes foreign girls”

“Really?… good for me then” you said. “But it must be difficult”

“Difficult?” you asked. “Yeah!…” she was laughing.

“I don’t get it” you shook your head. “Exactly!…” she laughs even more “A foreign could never be able to understand our culture” she has a huge smile on her fake plastic face.

“But I’m sure you are not worried about it…” she says.

“You are right is difficult sometimes. But I learn every day thanks to him, and also he. And trust me, our cultures combine in a perfect mix” you smiled.

It was like a battle to see which one had the falsest smile.

“I actually admire you…” she smiled “… I wouldn’t be in a relationship without future. I mean… he is not going to marry you”

(This bitch!)

You had never wanted to hit someone so much in your life, like now.

And then Ji yong appears “Here you are! I been looking… Oh! Hi”

“Hi! Sorry, I took her for a while because she seemed really bored, but it’s ok, she is not familiar with this kind of events” she winks at you, and you smiled. 

Ji yong didn’t know what to say, but he could feel the tension between you two.

“Well… I better go” she says, and then she left.

As soon as she disappeared you started to laugh angrily. “I’m really scared to ask” Ji yong says. “Then don't” you took a long sip from your drink.

“Follow me” he says, taking your hand. But you hesitate. “What is it?” he asked you. “The last time that I followed someone didn’t end well”

He smiles and dragged you upstairs, he was taking you to the balcony. It was huge, too big to have his own sitting area. And the most important thing, it has a beautiful view of the city.

Ji yong hugs you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder “Finally alone”

“You brought me here for this?” you laughed, and he sits, putting you on his lap “Downstairs, I can’t even hold your hand without people freaking out… imagine if they see me kissing you” he says before capturing your lips in an intense kiss…

Ji yong breaks the kiss, and stares at you “You are so gorgeous”. And you smiled, kissing him back.

Ji yong spent the next 5 minutes kissing you, and admiring the view.

“I know this is boring, but can we stay, just a little more” he asks. 

You sighed deeply, nodding. And he gives you a little kiss “That’s why I love you”

“Only for that?!” you said, and he laughs. “That’s just one of the thousands of reasons” and he kisses you again.

Actually after that, he only had another meeting with other man and it was pretty short, like fifteen minutes so you spend the rest of the night dancing with him, finally you were enjoying the party.

Two hours later, you were going home, and he asked you to stay with him.

You stayed at his house most of the days, anyways, even when you own your own.

When you arrived, he went directly to the bathroom while you were taking off your dress. When he came out he saw you in the bed, wearing one of his t shirts and he collapses beside you “Did you have fun?” he has his eyes closed, same as you. “Yes” you were lying on the bed, face to face, and one of his hands was resting on your waist.

He opens his eyes, staring at you for a while “Y/N…”

“Mmm…” you answered him half asleep.

“Marry me”

Continuation: “Love at first sight”

anonymous asked:

Hi. I am someone you like to call an 'anti'. I don't want trouble. Can you show me why I shouldn't believe that Louis is straight?

Let’s forget twitter. Let’s forget Larry. Let’s forget the “girlfriends”. Just focus on HIM and his actions, ok?

(no source for the vast majority of the gif’s, please let me know if you own one, ok?. Oh and LONG POST AHEAD.)

This is my attempt at explaining you or more like showing you with gifs how IN FACT TOTALLY NOT STRAIGHT Louis Tomlinson is.

Tell me this boy is straight…

Keep reading

7

5x16 “Dark Side of the Moon”

“Apparently the Nest Messes with the Victim’s Head, Shows Them Things They Love. Parts of Their Soul in Distress. It Keeps the Victim’s Soul Vulnerable” - Or: Have Some Meta Relating to S12 That Will Never Happen on the Show, But I Keep Writing about Anyway

I initally hadn’t wanted to write about this at all as I feel it kind of useless since it’s not going to be in any way featured in S12 I am 100% certain, but what can I say? Sometimes you hold onto hopes that you know will not be answered. ;) Point being: The newst promo pictures for S12 immediately had me thinking of the episode captured above and especially this particular moment due to the green/blue tint we have in the picture as well as the small, but important word “fear” placed atop Dean in this picture. Now, it seems it’s a cap from a clip, if you ask me, so the “fear” could be part of various sentences that make “fear” as a word itself not as relevant, but for now I’ll just treat it as a standalone word, because it makes it apply so nicely to 5x16 “Dark Side of the Moon”.

“Dark Side of the Moon” written by no other than new showrunner Andrew Dabb of course follows the Winchesters’ quest to escape Zachariah while in Heaven and stumbling across all kinds of “best of”-memories that soon turn sour especially for Dean since Sam’s “best of”-moments are mostly moments in which none of his family is featured. Now, whether Zach maybe chose certain memories in order to cause tension between Sam and Dean or not is really not relevant, but the fact that Dean feels like he had no “special place” within his brother’s Heaven surely relates perfectly to this moment coming along later in which Zachariah uses Dean memory of his mother to twist it around to his liking and to torture Dean in probably the most horrific ways as not only has he Mary tell Dean that she never loved him and considered him a burden, but also that it’s Dean’s own fault that people leave him behind, which directly connects to the experiences leading up to this moment where Dean has felt that Sam enjoyed the time away from him (it’s this fact that makes me wonder how much of those “greatest hits” of the boys were true “greatest hits” or how much those were manipulated by the angels too possibly) much more than those with him.

The show has gone out of its way on multiple ocassions to showcase that one of Dean’s biggest fears is to end up alone. So Zach having Mary tells exactly that to her son as well as that she never loved Dean is about the most painful and disgusting thing Zachariah could have done.

Now, the reason I had to think of this moment when seeing the S12 promo picture is due to how the greenish-blue tint in the episode indicated that something was not right, but that something went “toxic”. You can feel the emotions of fear, anger and hurt radiating off of Dean here due to what he is told - so to me it perfectly fits to the picture of Dean for S12 with the word “fear” atop of him. I think given that the connecting piece between S12 and this episode is Mary Winchester and the fact it was written by Andrew Dabb who, I suppose, shapes S12 as heavily as no other writer, I would not be surprised if he sort of “played” with this memory of Mary in Heaven in S12.

We already know from what Jensen said, that Mary will make the brothers more vulnerable and also someone Dean feels the need to protect and likely sacrifice himself for. And it’s this aspect of vulnerability overlapping with the emotion of fear that brings me back to S11 and the episodes that felt heavily important for myth arc things that seem to have been thrown overboard in the last few episodes and in so far are left hanging mid air imo.

I have talked about this before while S11 was still airing, but I am too lazy to find a link right now (sorry, I am being an even shittier person today than I already am in general I suppose lol), but basically 11x16 “Safe House” to me was one of the most important episodes in terms of foreshadowing (that sadly went nowhere in the end) and connection to the myth arc. The soul eater and the nest imo could be very well analyzed as parallels for the Empty and Amara.

While the reunion bit of God and Amara has been foreshadowed seasons in advance and didn’t exactly come as a surprise, the complete dropping and forgetting about the Empty was a little disheartening (at least for me). I am very much thinking that Mary is back completely and that Dean is well and alive in S12, but still I would like to offer a “theory” - though this is certainly too much of a word for these loose thoughts - on what could also have happened in the finale. I know it’s not where the show is going, but there’s room for possibility to headcanon into a different direction and have fun with crazily speculating anyway.

Keep reading

6

So, earlier when I was writing my post about Eggsy and Tilde, I realized that I need a whole separate post about how Eggsy loves and respects women.

So here, have a gifset of Eggsy loving and respecting the women in his life.  And also, have me telling you why every gif here is a good example (as well as discussing a few scenes that aren’t pictured). The wall of text under this read more is akin to the Great Wall of China.  Beware.

Keep reading

ALRIGHT, DEAR FOLLOWERS LISTEN TO ME PLEASE. It’s time for me to get some shits straight, unpopular opinions about over sensitive Tumblr. It’s long, but I WOULD REALLY LIKE IT IF YOU READ IT. It’s so very important.

1) TRIGGERS: 

Some triggers are absolutely delusional. For example: gifs, eye contact, food, cursing and much more… Excuse me, you’re on the fucking internet, gifs are part of this culture and have been there since 1987. Eye contact? What do you live in, a grotto? Food? Mc donald’s sitting in your country with its balls at every corner of your city. And good news, you have to eat FOOD every day. I first thought the system was good, like if you have phobias or this disease with the flashing lights that gets your body convulsing, but people are being way too sensitive. I have coulrophobia, phobia of clowns. I don’t want any of that shit near me, but you know, like yesterday a clown popped up at a tv program. I coped with it. It really scares me that YOU people who’re supposed to be already adults are this way. You’re probably already in the work industry, and it’s a world where you have to toughen up, my teacher (an amazing woman) always kept repeating me so. I also saw a South park episode, and it represented so well Tumblr’s community nowadays! Basically, there were people hiding in a transparent block, and this block represented their safe zone, and outside was a man who represented “reality” and that thus, the people inside the block weren’t letting reality enter the block, and so never face it. And last but not least, I had that one time someone asking me to tag videos, because apparently “you won’t know if there’s a jump scare in the end or something, and that’s very triggering to some people”. Well again here are some good news from queen obvious: jump scares are MEANT to scare you. The first one I saw was when I was nine years old, I cried, it was scary as fuck… But I’m here, safe and sound. 

2) ABOUT RP THEMES:

There was someone who once claimed that if you’re not a victim, you can’t rp certain themes. Like, if you’ve never been raped, you can’t rp rape RP. This is so… sad. So, if I want to rp incest for whatever reason, I have to fuck with my brother first? Absolutely not. I shouldn’t have the right or not to roleplay something based on my personal experiences. If I want to roleplay female with female fluff, do I have to become homosexual? Impossible.

3) UNDERAGE SMUT:

OOOOO WE’RE GOING ON A TOUCHY SUBJECT. It’s a slippery sloppy slide. Just as anyone would do his or her or their, whatever, coming out. I am telling you that I am 17. Exactly, one year away from hitting 18 years old if you went at least in primary school in your life, you can count. But I roleplay-ED and roleplay smut. Now before making that cringing face and going to talk to your buddies about how much of a liar I am, let me tell you some things. We all did it. For those who like to write this I mean. We all wrote some shitty one liners that went along the lines of: he puts his dick in her belly button and gives her a baby. Maybe it wasn’t that bad, but we sure all once were curious children, who had fun writing about these things. About the legality stuff now, more seriously. The police has other things to do than dealing with those affairs. If both rp partners agree to doing a fictional sex scene, then there’s no problem. You are not your character, you are simply depicting a scene. Now if your partner turns out to be a harasser, here you can do something, but otherwise if you agreed, you both will enjoy writing with each other, no? And how even would anyone even know your real age? Come on, we have no real proof that you are the age you claim to be. I find it strange that 99% of Tumblr blogs are directed by 18+ muns. No but honestly, please don’t be delusional and think about it. So underage writing gore with you is okay, hurting, torturing, guts everywhere, all of that is fine, but a breast touch and WHOOPS IT’S TABOO? Excuse my French (literally) but you’re an asshole. Now I can understand that you don’t feel comfortable, and in this case politely refuse to rp such things. That’s all. But as a matter of fact, I’ve seen so many adults unable to write smut correctly, things like: *moans, *sucks* and the likes.People need to do the difference between fiction and reality. If you want to draw, on a side note, DO IT. DRAW EVERYTHING YOU WANT, no matter how gross. I would rather have someone depicting abuse on a paper rather than relieving their rotten desires in reality. As I know that it sometimes help people. This does not mean that I condone it, far from it. I hate animal abuse, it’s truly the worst for me, but I’d rather have someone drawing a horrible thing rather than hurting a creature. Going to move on, because for personal reasons, this thing really disgust me and makes me sad.

4) ANON HATE:

HEY COWARD. YES YOU, WHO HIDES BEHIND A GREY FACE. GROW SOME BALLS HAH. I can’t fucking stand anon hate, Even if I had the whole world against me, I’d still face you and not go anonymous. That’s how you handle problems.FIN. Now if you decide to unfollow because boohoo, ha-hi-hoo, then do it I don’t mind it is your right. I will know who you are, and probably be disappointed, but apart from this, you can feel safe. I respect your choice to unfollow me if you decide to not enter reality with me.

coffeeisoxygen  asked:

Hey, I don't know if you've got this question before but... In ASiB, during the palace scene, there is kind of interesting mirroring not only in how they're positioned - two on one sofa and two on the other. But Sherlock is sitting next to John, across from his brother. And Mycroft is sitting next to a man named HARRY, across from his brother. The man being named Harry cannot be a coincidence. Plus Mycroft and Harry have matching ties. Any thoughts? :)

HA, his name is Harry??! Awesome catch. Okay, let’s take a look.

Here’s Mycroft and Harry.

The ties – my first thought was that perhaps in the UK there are unofficial rules about ties for politicians. In the US, most politicians wear red and blue ties, particularly for ceremonies/appearances. UK readers, please correct me if there’s another meaning here that I’m missing, but I think yellow is a color associated with liberalism, while dark blue is associated with conservatism, and that is perhaps the meaning of their ties here.

So…Mycroft is liberal, Harry is half-and-half. Interesting. (At least, for the purposes of this scene.)

Now watch as these four do a fun little criss-cross. First we get Harry-Sherlock, Mycroft-John.

Change your partner, do-se-do…

Of course, we all know who’s going to end up mirroring who. Their names are sibling parallels – Harry faces John, Mycroft faces Sherlock.

I’ll be mother. Mycroft says this as he pours the tea, cementing the familial thing we have going on here.

So…those ties and their colors. Well, a big part of the conversation that’s about to happen is about sexuality, in regards to Irene and Sherlock’s client. I don’t want to generalize political parties, or really get into politics too much, but when it comes to liberal vs conservative and we’re talking about sexuality, we all know which side tends to draw more voters who identify as something other than heterosexual. That said:

Mycroft/Sherlock – solidly yellow, liberal. 

Harry/John – half dark blue (conservative), half yellow (liberal).

Welp. If you’re on Team Gay!Sherlock and Team Bi!John, this tie thing works out nice. Particularly because Bi!John seems to have a lot of conservative issues with his erm, yellow half.

Harry is hesitant to tell the boys any details about the person who engaged Irene’s services. One detail in particular – her gender. Mycroft, however, has no qualms with it.

I can tell you it’s a young person. Cut to John innocently sipping his tea, from Mycroft’s POV.

Cut to a shot of Mycroft from John’s POV. A young…female person.

Time to watch all the reactions to the blatant YELLOW which has just been brought into the conversation! Here’s John from Mycroft’s POV (surprise, curiosity): 

Sherlock’s reaction from Harry’s POV (amusement, increased interest):

Harry’s reaction from Sherlock’s POV (discomfort, anxiety, shifting gaze from John to Sherlock, then away, then back to Sherlock):

And possibly the best reaction of all – Mycroft, looking from John to Sherlock then closing his eyes with a weary, “yes, the client is queer, can we all just get over it already” sigh:

Take a look at those four gifs all stacked up. That’s exactly how it’s presented in the episode, with John and Sherlock’s framing matching, and Harry and Mycroft’s framing matching.

So let’s look at those reactions again, only think of Harry and Mycroft as mirrors for their siblings:

John: Curious, surprised.

Mirror John: Anxious, uncomfortable.

Sherlock: Amused, interested.

Mirror Sherlock: Exasperated.

John continues to gape at Mycroft as his two halves do battle – the yellow half (let’s be frank) imagining Irene in a variety of compromising positions with another woman, the dark blue half feeling shocked at the mere thought of a queer member of the royal family.

Sherlock (exasperatedly?) tells John to pull it together.

Before the boys leave, Sherlock does a quick deduction of Harry (just like he’ll do with John (and Irene) in a few scenes).

It’s interesting to speculate that maybe some of these are hints about Harry Watson. (Here’s hoping we find out in season four!) I’m not sure what to make of most of them, although I do think “half Welsh” is interesting (just in terms of how it reinforces the whole “half this, half that” thing). 

Oh, and here’s a cool detail – when Mycroft poured the tea, he said “I’ll be mother,” referencing a superstition that only one person in a home should pour the tea, it usually being the mother of the family. And here we see Harry is a father. And right above that – tea drinker! (Which is a funny thing for Sherlock to deduce, considering he literally just saw him drink tea.)

There’s probably a ton more to deduce from this scene. Any additions? 

singersaraneth-deactivated20170  asked:

I was wondering, are there many movies that adapt Lovecraft's work well? I've been wanting to see some, but I don't know which ones will leave a bad taste in my mouth

Hey, there. Thanks for the question. It’s one that I get every few weeks/months and that I’m happy to respond to whenever I catch some time. I always start off by linking to previous responses and then see if I have anything to add or to clarify: (right-click and open in a new tab if they give you trouble)

Originally posted by saburomatoba

from The Lurking Fear (1994)

Now, by way of additions and/or clarifications, I guess I would add that these are certainly personal preferences, albeit ones anchored in my own personal set of criteria. When I’m judging these things, I like to consider how “close” to the text they are, obviously (fidelity, in other words), if they’re claiming to be adaptations; however, I’m not overly concerned with what I’ve heard called “purity.” Dagon (2001) by Stuart Gordon, for example, is clearly more of an adaptation of The Shadow Over Innsmouth than its eponym; and, even so, it’s still pretty far afield from Lovecraft’s story. That doesn’t make it any less enjoyable, in my view. Most of Gordon’s movies are packed with gore and sex (sex that is profoundly alien to HPL’s fiction), but they’re still a good time. I’d rather focus on how well a movie uses the Mythos for its own story’s development (beyond the pastiche that gets mentioned a lot when discussing sub-par Mythos fiction, etc.), how knowledgeable the creator seems to be of the Mythos they’re manipulating, and then on to all of the basic stuff I enjoy seeing in my Cosmic Horror, Lovecraftian or otherwise: de-centering of Human existence/relevance; “big” perspective/events of larger consequence (rather than, say, individual/personal drama, personal losses or fear); elements of the unexplained/able; elements of the Weird (resisting the urge to over-explain or provide simple solutions, veiling, that sort of thing); and, finally, a relatively unhappy ending of some sort.

Originally posted by vincentpriceonline

from The Haunted Palace (1963)

For the folks who don’t want to visit any of the older links, here are five+ “Lovecraftian” productions that usually make my rec list. Again, these may not be straight-on/close to the text adaptations but still fairly faithful in terms of their integration of Mythos elements and Cosmicism as a sort of philosophical approach to Horror. These exclude the non-Mythos works of CH, though:

For many, many more, see that Letterboxd List mentioned above (and view the notes/click the orange box). Additionally, here is a link to a list of selections from Mike Davis. I assume most Lovecraft fans are already familiar with Lovecraft eZine, but he has great taste, of course, and that’s a good resource for this sort of thing. If you dare to dip into the comments section there, you’ll see that everybody and their uncle has suggestions, too. It’s the nature of the ‘community’ to be fairly critical for various reasons/in general, so take just about any list with a grain of salt, including mine.
Finally, the fact that you’re already aware, it seems, of how many terrible attempts at adaptation are out there tells me you’re approaching this with the right kind of mindset. I say that with affection for the content, too, since if the road a Horror fan walks is paved with bad movies, the Lovecraft lane of it is a particularly dark and rocky one. :D Weird Fiction is tough to adapt to film, so I think it’s reasonable to be a little less, well, stringent with standards while viewing.   
I hope this is useful in some way. Have a nice weekend and thanks for following.

Lucaya Hints Compilation Post (Updated_1)

This is a compilation of all the Lucaya hints I, and others have picked up on through out nearly two seasons. Here goes. let me know if I missed something out. (This is the updated version_1. With more observations I didn’t notice before.)

Pictures and gifs below.

Keep reading

I heard the door close. I listened to the taxi drive away. Then there was just silence. Unbearable, painful silence. And I was alone. Again.

2 months later

And you haven’t heard from him AT ALL?”, your friend, and colleague, asked you.

Nope. I talked to his mum a week after. She asked what happened, because he wouldn’t talk to her about it and he wasn’t the same. I told her we broke up, because I couldn’t handle his life and she understood, but said she was sorry. And that’s the last I heard. Everything else I know from the media, which is not necessarily the truth.”

Hmmm…”

What?”

Nothing. I just can’t believe he just went back to his job and everyday-life. I mean, your break-up was pretty messy, for both of you. I’d have thought he’d do more about it, that’s all.”

I think I was pretty clear there was no way back for us, and he probably just accepted that.”

Keep reading

bloodsport (fighting in a love war) [23/?]

I would say sorry, but I’m not. 

rival assassins AU: they live in a world rife with death and destruction (of which they are often the cause) - is it even possible to feel anything other than the thrill of the kill? [also available on ff.net] [cs assassins series so far]

23. coin drop: Killian gets a new target and Emma is not as understanding this time.

It’s a Tuesday and a generally nice day.

The steady onslaught of rain is a soothing metronome against the window of his hotel room, a blurry mass of dark clouds blotting out the morning sky beyond it.

His phone rings. The classic Nokia ringtone is a stark contrast to the natural dulcet tones permeating the room and he puts down the book he was reading to seek out the singing device (Swan had teased him for the old fashioned sound bite as soon as she heard it, laughing hysterically and adding it to the list of things that apparently made him an ’old man trapped in a young man’s body’).

(He resents that title.)

Strolling across the room, he glances at the caller ID and answers. Gold’s leathery cadence greets him, all business when he says, “You’ve got a new target.”

Keep reading

Song Preference: They Just Don't Know You by Little Mix

request :)

Michael:

Daddy doesn’t think that you’ll be good enough for me
Mama says be careful ‘cause he’ll break your heart in three
They don’t walk in my shoes
They ain’t being kissed by you

“What’s wrong (y/n), you’ve been acting really weird since we had dinner with your parents.”

“I don’t know, Michael, they just–” you trail off.

“They just what?” he says, walking over to you and grabbing your hands.

“They think I’m too good for you. They don’t want us to be together. My mom thinks that you’re just going to break my heart but—” he cuts you off by kissing you.

“I’ll never break your heart. I’ll always be here for you. And they can think that, but I can prove them wrong.”

You smile, knowing he’s right.

Suddenly, your phone vibrates.

Text from: Mom

So have you talked to him yet?

Michael grabs your phone and throws it on the couch, picking you up bridal style and carries you up to your bedroom.

Ashton:

It’s funny 'cause at times it feels like us against the world
They treat you like a criminal but I’ll still be your girl

“Ashton, what are you reading?” you say, walking into the the tv room, seeing Ashton intensely staring at his laptop.

“Nothing” he mumbles.

“Ash. Tell me.” you say, sitting down next to him. He tilts the laptop so you can read the screen. It’s open to a newspaper’s headline.

Rock band 5 Seconds of Summer’s Drummer, Ashton Irwin Caught in Scandal

You look at his face and he looks like he’s going to cry. He scrolls down.

Irwin was seen leaving a bar yesterday with a girl who is a bartender there. Irwin is one of the members of the band who has a girlfriend, which creates more of a scandal.

He rips the laptop off his lap and sets it on the coffee table.

Your phone vibrates. It’s twitter. You open up all of your mentions.

@(y/t/n) what are you going to do about ashton’s affair?

@(y/t/n) hahaha told you it’d happen

Then you get a text

Text from: (y/sister’s/n)

i told you, (y/n), he’s only trouble. he’s basically a criminal and you know it. it’s time to end it

“It’s not–”

“I know Ash, that’s your cousin”

“How?”

“I went to that bar last night and she introduced herself to me. She’s really sweet.” you say, smiling.

“Oh my gosh, I had no idea what you thought of me.”

“Ashton, I’m basically the only person that doesn’t think you’re a criminal, I trust you.”

Calum:

Tell me, tell me you won’t break my heart
You won’t tear my world apart
That you’ll be there when I need

“Calum, what is this?” you say, picking up girl’s underwear from the ground.

He smirks. He’s been your best friend for seven years now, roommate for three and and you’ve been in love with him for six. He does sleep around a lot and he hasn’t really had a steady girlfriend since you met him. 

“You know what they are.” He smiles.

“Oh I do know, it’s just kind of funny that she left them here.”

He smiles, taking them and throwing them in the trash.

“Hey! Those were kinda cute!” you sarcastically say.

He just kind of looks at you. He takes a step closer. And another step. And another. And another until his lips are finally on yours. 

“Calum…”

“Shh” he says, kissing you again.

“Calum.” you sternly say, pulling away from him.

He stands back, scared.

“Calum. I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Do you not like—”

“No. Calum. Of course I do. But I can’t just be a one night stand. We live together and you’re my best friend. I don’t want to ruin that.”

He takes a deep breath.

“(y/n), do you know why I’ve only had these stupid little one night stands? Because I’ve loved you this whole time. I just didn’t think you could or would love me back. I promise that I won’t break your heart. I’ve been by your side for seven years and I promise to be by your side for as long as I possibly can. I just can’t bear seeing you everyday and not kissing you and telling you that I love you.”

You take another step towards him and crash your lips into his.

“I’ll take that as a yes?”

Luke:

My sister says she doesn’t like the way you wear your hair
But I know that she’s jealous so why would I even care?

“I don’t understand, (y/n), why do you even like him?” your sister asks you, hanging you a clean dish to dry.

“Because I do, okay. He’s perfect for me and I love him.”

“You love him?”

“Yeah I do, we’ve been dating for two years, I’ve loved him for that whole time and we’ve said it already, (y/s/n), I’m pretty sure it’s okay for me to love him.”

“Yeah, but why him? He’s just not your type. He’s so like punk. He’s got a lip ring, (y/n).”

“What the fuck does a lip ring have to do with who I love. Plus, I love his lip ring.”

“Why would you love a lip ring?”

“I love everything about him.”

“Even his hair?”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean.”

Your sister gives you that look and turns back to washing the dishes. 

You grab your phone and dial Luke’s number.

“What are you doing?” your sister asks.

You ignore her, but continue staring at her.

“Hey Luke!”

“Hey baby! What’s up?”

“Oh, I’m just washing the dishes with my sister. I just wanted to call and say that I love you.” you smile at your sister.

“Oh. Well I love you too!” you smile, it still makes you happy that he loves you.

“Oh by the way, (y/s/n/) says she doesn’t like your hair”

“What’s wrong with my hair?”

You hand the phone to your sister.

“He wants to know what’s wrong with his hair.” you say.

She grabs the phone.

“Hey.” she bluntly says.

She stands there, listening intently at something that Luke is saying. She hands you the phone after listening to Luke for about two minutes. You walk out of the room.

“(y/n), ok, I know this is long overdue, but I want you to come on tour with me. I know we’re leaving in a week but-”

“Yes.”

request :)

anonymous asked:

hey there :) i still don't know how to express my feelings but i'm gonna try... first of all I love carol SO, SO much. i know she's selfless and loving and amazing and complex. but i have to admit i'm having some difficulty now that i think about the 5b arc. i mean, i have to say i was unpleasantly surprised with the way she lied to glenn and michonne... (I wanted her and Michonne to be close, yknow?) and i'm not sure as to why she would keep her act in the ASZ anymore. (+)

[ask continued] (+) I mean, the scene with Pete was amazing (though I wish they had kept the bit Mel mentions in TD when Carol leaves his house), but I don’t like the way that apart from that, in the finale, Carol has been manipulative towards not only the alexandrians (which is already problematic) but part of her family. I’m worried about where that’ll go. I’m with you with the whole not being a Rick fan thing, so it worries me that he seems to be the only one she’s been agreeing with recently. :( Thoughts?

_________________________

Hi anon, and I’m super sorry it took me so long to answer this.

God, I love Carol with my soul. I cannot imagine anything that could happen that would ever change this, that would ever make my allegiance to her falter. I love her more than any fictional human. I’m with her to the end of the line.

Let me just put it out there — straight no chaser — that I’m concerned about Carol at the moment too, but not for any of the same reasons that a lot of people are. I’m concerned because of what I see happening in the media — the way words and phrases such as “scary,” “calculating,” “the devil on Rick’s shoulder,” “Iago to Rick’s Othello,” and a bunch more craptastic blah blah blah are slowly making their way into article after article. Fuck on a fuckstick, you cannot win as a woman in this world. If you don’t do anything, you’re a weak, burdonsome, useless wimp. If you do everything, you’re a cold, calculating, soulless monster whose story arc is clearly over. To which I say:

[.gif by rickgrimespls]

I think it is monumentally important to remember that while for us as viewers, more than a year has elapsed since ”Infected,” for Carol I don’t think it’s been more than two months. (You guys who timeline like a boss please feel free to correct me if I’m off here.)

In that time she has:

  • Killed two people she knew and cared about in a misguided attempt to save everyone
  • Been cast out from her family by Constable Fuckboy
  • Headed back to the prison (hoping to do whatever she could to help, I might add) and managed to find Tyreese, the girls, and Judith
  • Busted her ass to teach both Mika and Lizzie how the world works now, only for her efforts to result in Mika’s death
  • Made the choice to kill Lizzie, both because she loved that little girl so much that there was no other way and because she was determined to save the child of a man who had treated her like garbage
  • Killed a whole bunch more people saving the entire crew at Terminus
  • Kept the secret about what happened with the girls because Tyreese asked her to
  • Been on the verge of running away to be on her own again, only to get dragged back in, because despite what she says, she is genetically incapable of not trying to save people
  • Been hit by a car, sustaining multiple serious injuries
  • Watched Beth — the girl she was still trying to save — die in front of her
  • Dealt with Tyreese’s death (no matter what — they shared an experience nobody else will ever understand, and it mattered)
  • Emotionally supported Daryl when it should have been the other way around (come at me, whatever)
  • Walked weaponless into a community of people she doesn’t know or trust, when she literally had to blow up the last community of human beings she ran across because they enjoyed eating people

And I’m probably forgetting a few things. The point is that Carol is not cold, unfeeling, emotionless, or anything remotely synonymous with those terms.

No. She is terrified. She is shut down. She has closed herself off to absolutely everything, because she lives in constant fear that if she drops even a fraction of her guard for a fraction of a second, something else terrible will happen.

She let down her guard around Rick and he locked the car door.
She let down her guard around Lizzie and Mika and they died.
She let down her guard around Daryl during “Consumed” and Beth died.

She’s not going to let down her guard again, not for anybody (well, almost).

If you’re ever doubting who Carol is right now, just think about her face when she tries to tell Daryl that she can’t let herself feel it, and the emotions are so overwhelming to her that she can’t even get the entire sentence out of her mouth.

Think about the look on her face when Rick says (in “Conquer”) “I was thinkin’, how many of you do I have to kill to save your lives?” DO YOU SEE HER FACE? The things she’s done haunt her, because she has to shoulder all of that all by herself. She is the only one who knows. And until that changes, she has to have the walls up, all day every day, 24/7, with everyone.

Carol’s not crazy. She’s not cold. She hasn’t lost her humanity, not even a little. Every moment she spends with Sam is a testament to this. And that’s the goddamn sucker-punch. She fights so effing hard not to let him in, but in the end, children are her weakness. Because she knows exactly what it’s like to be small and defenseless and powerless and scared, and no matter how much she wants to stay emotionally safe, her perfect beautiful heart can’t stand by and watch a child suffer. It just can’t. So the armor cracks for Sam.

I don’t know what the show is doing. I don’t. So I am not here to make promises of any sort. What I do know is that Carol is, deep inside, the same person she has always been. Loving, moral, nurturing, strong as fuck, and altruistic to a goddamn fault.

This is the character I love, and she’s still right here.

[.gif by kingstonmcbride]

anonymous asked:

hi! this is not hate about destiel, but why are shippers so upset about what jensen said? why would they feel cheated because to me it seemed that dean and cas are only good friends on the show, not romance? i don't want to offend you, ignore this if you don't want to reply

Hey there. :)

I’m not offended, I love hearing other peoples’ opinions, as long as they share them in a polite way (like you just did).

I even agree with you to a certain extent; there are plenty of things that happened between Dean and Cas that also could’ve applied to them being in a ‘just close friends’ relationship. However, I’ll stick with what I have always said; aside from the ‘bromance moments’ there are also too many tropes being used between the two of them that are painfully romantic in my opinion. Now we’re talking about 5 seasons here, so analyzing them all would take forever, but you know what, I’ll list a few things that I think are obviously crossing that border of ‘platonic’. I’m not even going to include any of the many gifs of longing looks or stares between the two of them, because I suppose that you can interpret those however you want, but here are some aspects that the writers themselves added, and that I think can’t simply be ignored…

[Castiel]

One of the first things that had my alarm bells ringing, is this seemingly ‘innocent’ quote in season five. Castiel tells Dean:

“I killed two angels this week, some of my brothers. I’m hunted, I’ve rebelled, and I did it, all of it, for you.”

Now there could’ve been many ways  for Castiel to get his point across here. “I did it because you showed me there is a better way.” “I did it because you showed me that I should think for myself.” “I did it for you and your family.” “I did it because it was the right thing to do.” And so on, and so forth.

But here we have it; Castiel clearly states that he already (they’ve known each other for like a year here) did everything that he does for Dean. Not for humanity, not for ‘the Winchesters’, not for ‘the greater good’, not because he is generally tired of the way his own family handles things. He gives up his home, he goes against his family, he forgets about everything he’s ever believed in, all for a guy he met a year ago?! Also, Castiel has been around for MILLENIA. What do you think a year means in the grand scheme of things to someone like Castiel? The answer is nothing. Yet he did all of it for Dean. I’m sorry, but that doesn’t sound like dude-bros to me… Like yes, I love my friends, a lot. And yes, I would make sacrifices for them… But kill my own family and abandon my own home for someone? Yeah, I’d have to have serious feelings for that person, and not in a bromance kind of way.

Over the seasons, this theme keeps returning over and over and over again. It’s the ancient cliché, tale as old as time; Angel falls in love with a human and in the end gives up everything including his wings for said human. This is the only way to briefly summarize the relationship between Cas and Dean, and it seems dangerously romantic to me.

Moving on.

One of the most popular romantic tropes that’s being used in books, on TV shows and in movies, is the whole guy-watches-the-girl-sleep trope. Shockingly, this trope has been used between Dean and Cas not one, but several times. An especially suspicious case is that one time when Cas watches Dean sleep and is patiently waiting for him to wake up, then he does wake up and Castiel goes like ‘what were you dreaming about?”

I’m sorry, but if I caught my best friend watching me sleep and they asked me ‘what were you dreaming about’ the second I woke up… I would definitely ask them if there’s something they needed to get off their chest regarding the state of our relationship, lol.

Moving on again.

The infamous ‘Castiel watches Dean rake leaves’ scene.

Aside from the fact that Castiel looks heartbroken at the thought of asking Dean for help because he doesn’t want to disturb ‘Dean’s happy life’, this is the reason he decides to WORK WITH THE KING OF HELL. The reason he decides to work with his mortal enemy is based on nothing but him NOT WANTING TO DISTURB DEAN’S HAPPINESS. That’s it. That’s the reason. Again, I would do plenty of stuff to help out my friends, but these are all pretty big biggies, if you ask me. Especially for someone like Castiel who hasn’t cared about anything or anyone in millennia. All he did was follow orders, never caring about the collateral damage. Yet the first thing in thousands of years that gets through to him is this one insignificant human? Okay.

Moving on yet again.

I think episodes 9x22 and 9x23 speak for themselves. In 9x22 Metatron doesn’t get it (or pretends he doesn’t get it). He says Castiel is in love with humanity. However, in 9x23 he fesses up. He clearly tells the audience that it was never about Cas being in love with humanity, or even about Cas saving heaven and his brothers and sisters. It was about Cas loving Dean. And that’s fine, but for me it is very hard to view this as a non-romantic thing. Even if I had not been a shipper, and I’d been against Destiel, I probably would’ve thought ‘oh fuck please no, these writers are going to do it, aren’t they’ after watching those particular episodes.

Like I said, just a few examples, there are many more. But moving on, which bring us to…

[Dean]

Now there have been hints in earlier seasons (in my opinion), but I think the shippers can all agree that season 8 was the point where the writers brutally slapped Dean (as well as the audience) in the face with his feelings for Castiel. Everything that happens in season 8 is hinting at feelings from Dean’s side, some of it even tying into earlier seasons. Dean couldn’t stand the thought of leaving Cas behind in purgatory, he refused to leave without him, even though Castiel would only be a burden instead of an asset when it came to escaping purgatory. Dean didn’t care, he was not going to leave without Cas, and most of his time in purgatory he spent running around killing off monsters while aggressively demanding for them to tell him where his angel was.

Now Dean is known to be a good friend, and to care deeply for his friends and family. Yet, over the years, people have been sacrificed for the greater good with him being more okay with it than with the idea of leaving Castiel behind. Jo, Ellen, and later on Benny; I’m sure Dean felt bad about it, but it was something he could ‘learn to live with’ and you see him ‘move on from it’ within a matter of one or two episodes. But no, leaving Cas behind never seemed to be an option as far as Dean was concerned. Even when he finds Castiel and Cas is reluctant to come with him, he throws in another ‘I need you’, not willing to let Cas go.

When Dean comes back from purgatory without Castiel, he even alters his own memories and blocks out what really happened because he simply couldn’t deal with the idea of Cas not wanting to stay with him. After that, he starts hallucinating that he sees Cas. We have that one scene where Dean hallucinates seeing Castiel walking on the side of the road as he drives by. This is the exact trope that has been used for Sam and the love of his life (Jess) in earlier seasons. Which makes you wonder; is it really so weird for the audience to make that connection?

Apparently Dean has a hard time going on in life without Cas, which has been pointed out to us on several occasions. Season 7 was the exact same thing; most days Dean drinks himself into a stupor (mainly) because of losing Cas. Remember when Dean lost Lisa and Ben after he asked Castiel to erase their memories, because it was safer for them? Lisa was supposed to be the love of Dean’s life, yet you see him have a teary-eyed moment in that episode where he says goodbye to them, and later on they are never ever mentioned again. You don’t even really see him silently pine over it. SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HIS EPIC LOVESTORY. He needed one episode to move on from her. He needed a season to move on from Castiel, and after that he still didn’t manage. And that’s fine. But then please do not call us delusional for thinking that he has more than just dude-bro feelings when it comes to Castiel.

The ‘I need you’ in the crypt scene is another one of those examples; even Jensen Ackles admitted that there was supposed to be an ‘I love you’ from Dean to Castiel. Jensen wanted a change in the script because he didn’t think Dean would ever say those words to anyone (and I agree with him there) but it does show us the way THE WRITERS are viewing this relationship. Because at the end of the day, the writers seemed to find it fitting to add those words there. Would you ever add those words to a scene between two grown up platonic dude-bros? Hell, I don’t think Dean has ever even said those words to Sammy during those 9 seasons, yet the writers didn’t think it would be out of place for Dean to say it to Castiel at that point. What does that tell us about how the writers feel about this relationship? In that same scene we have the ‘what broke the connection’ in the end, and Castiel’s answer is ‘I don’t know’… We never found out, but isn’t the answer quite obvious then?

Now, I thought that they were trying to downplay it in season 9, but one of the worst scenes that confirms that there are feelings from Dean’s side, is that scene in 9x06 (Heaven Can’t Wait) where he is standing outside of the Gas N’ Sip, dramatically looking at Cas through the window. There even is romantic music playing in the background, for crying out loud.

Or the scene where they say goodbye in 9x06. Or even worse, the scene where Cas unbuttons his shirt, and Dean obviously checks him out. Was it in the script? Was it an acting choice on Jensen’s part?  The world may never know, but the fact is that; IT HAPPENED. There is visual evidence.

Bottom line, it either had to be in the script, or Jensen consciously made the decision to do it. I’m not even sure which option is worse.

Again; There are plenty more examples, but these are the ones that stood out to me as a viewer.

Don’t get me wrong: If for some reason (any reason) the writers chickened out in the end and don’t want to go through with it, I respect that. If some CW network head honcho decided that it was a no-go and it’s out of the writers’ control, I also respect that. If Jensen Ackles in the end decided that he didn’t want to go through with romantic Destiel after all because he is uncomfortable with it; I fully respect that, and I still love Jensen with a passion. If anyone in the fandom dislikes the ship, or doesn’t want the ship to happen, I respect that.

BUT WHAT PEOPLE NEED TO STOP DOING… Is making it seem like we’re delusional for observing with our EYES. It happened. It was taped, it was recorded, it is on blue ray, it is on Netflix. The evidence is there. And if for some reason someone (anyone) chickened out and is doing takesies backsies now, I can respect that. But for the love of god, stop acting like we’re all insane for acknowledging all of these romantic tropes that the writers THEMSELVES have put in there between these two characters. Stop making us look bad by saying we’re on crack for shipping this, because the show itself is telling us otherwise. This is the reason people are upset, because they feel baited. If this same story line had been used for Dean and a version of Castiel in a female vessel, by now the angry mobs would be crowding the CW office for not making this canon after 5 seasons.

Stop ship-shaming people because this happens to be a story between two males. Personally I have never even been one for ‘crack shipping’ on any show, I ship this because I SEE A LOVE STORY ON THIS SHOW between these two characters.

Now whether it still goes canon or not (seeing as Jensen’s opinion is just that, an opinion) I respect whatever decision the writers make, and I will still be watching the show. But for the love of god, please no one act like all Destiel shippers are not right in the noodle for seeing all of these things that CAN (I’m saying ‘can’, not ‘have to’) easily be viewed as ‘romance’.

So I guess that pretty much summarizes the problem. If you read all of this, you deserve a medal. :p

anonymous asked:

I know we all have talked about what the moment was when Oliver fell in love with Felicity ad nausem but what do you think was the specific moment Felicity fell in love with Oliver? And I don't mean physical attraction because that's always been there, but actual deep feelings, more than friend feelings?

Wow, you don’t ask for the easy things, do you, Anon? ;)

I took some time with this one mainly because I wanted to go back and re-watch season 2 to be able to answer your question properly. Because you’re right, the important thing is to distinguish between the early physical attraction/crush and the actual deep totally-in-love-forever-and-ever part. And if that was difficult enough with Oliver, it is even harder to pinpoint with Felicity. 

Again, I would look at 2.06 as a marker. It was a pivotal episode for both Oliver and Felicity in their separate reactions to each other. We’ve spoken about what it meant for Oliver, but what about Felicity? People said - at the time - that Felicity’s reaction towards Isabel came “out of nowhere”, that it was out of character. I personally don’t agree. Maybe it was “out of character” for her to be so vocal about it at the time, because up until then she had largely left Oliver and his love life to his own devices…but I don’t think that it particularly came out of nowhere. 

Her reaction to Isabel was twofold. The reason that she never really spoke up against Oliver’s relationships with Laurel or Helena (apart from the psycho ex bit) or McKenna is that they were clearly real relationships - at least in Oliver’s mind. Plus, she disliked Isabel from the beginning because Isabel had plans to gut QC and make all those employees redundant. Isabel was clearly marked as the enemy from the very beginning so to have Oliver sleep with her, that too not because he wants a relationship but just because, well, she’s there and he’s horny…that had to have stung. 

Secondly, Felicity clearly had feelings for Oliver. She’d had them - I would say - since mid to late season 1 - and while those feelings may not yet have been strong enough to be called love with a capital L, they were clearly heading in that direction. In the early days of season 2 it’s still in the flirtation stage - “I liked watching you do that” etc. - but come 2.06, and the jarring effect of seeing a woman she dislikes intensely coming out of Oliver’s room - especially when their friend is sitting in jail waiting for them to bust him out. Seriously, Oliver - what the hell were you thinking?! - clearly hurt her. The pain on her face was because of more than just a crush or physical attraction. I think even Felicity could not have named it then, but I do believe that was a turning point in her feelings for him. 

Then we get 2.07. Again, a pivotal moment for both Oliver and Felicity inasfar as their personal realisations go. I’m not talking about the infamous three arrows scene, but what comes after. 

I love this moment so much. It is so tender, so loving. The first thing that they both do is touch each other, make sure the other person is okay. It’s pure instinct. It’s almost synchronised. She doesn’t care here that she was nearly shot up with Vertigo; all she cares about is that Oliver was shot. Similarly, he does his thing of cupping her cheek, which we know he loves (God, how I miss the touching this season), concerned only with her safety. It is a beautiful moment that says more to me than the later speech. I love that “there was no choice to make" speech, don’t get me wrong. But this moment speaks volumes to me. The lengths that they will both go to - her saying, “Don’t [kill him]. Not for me.”; him with the three arrows - this scene proves beyond any doubt that their feelings for one another are deeper than either of them realised. 

Watch Felicity immediately after this, when Oliver gets up to go to the window. Sadly I can’t find a gif for this and it would take me way too long to make it, but as he gets up and his hand leaves the side of her neck, Felicity moves her own hand up to replace it, as if she is already missing the warmth of his hand and is trying to contain it for as long as possible. It’s not about friendship here, or the fact that she just had a very close call. It’s about his comfort, his love and hers. 

Having said all that, I don’t think that Felicity fully allowed herself to admit her love for him. Oliver tried to hide his feelings through his relationship with Sara and by basically never talking about it, but Felicity I think went a step further and actually buried it deep within herself and didn’t even admit it in her own mind. I say this because immediately after the moments above, we get 2.08 and 2.09 and Barry Allen. Barry insists, time and again, that Felicity has feelings for Oliver. He can see it despite only having known her a short while. But she continues to deny it, and I think she either believes that she doesn’t have feelings for Oliver, or is trying to make herself believe it. She who doth protest too much, etc. When Barry comes along, she thinks “finally, a guy whose in my league and not someone wholly unattainable”. So she tries her damndest to pursue that avenue. This doesn’t mean that her feelings for Oliver disappear; just that she never truly believes there is a chance for them, and therefore it is best to quit while you’re ahead and move on before it becomes truly heartbreaking. But even in Three Ghosts, we see Felicity’s feelings for Oliver come through in her jealous remark: “How many girls were you marooned with? Sure this wasn’t Fantasy Island?”. Plus, this was - and correct me if I am wrong - the first time that Felicity and Oliver hug. She initiates that. Again, for the first time, she asks Oliver to promise that he will return. She has never asked that before. She knows the score; she knows the danger and it’s not that she hasn’t worried before, but this time is different. This time she is begging him to promise that he will come back alive, and when he does, she rushes into his arms. She lingers. 

Then of course we get that moment in 2.10 with the slight - and very cheeky, writers! - misdirect when she asks “Does that mean I have a shot [LONG, DRAMATIC PAUSE]…at Employee of the Month?” 

I think the main difference between the way that Oliver fell in love with her and the way that Felicity fell in love with him is that Oliver fell in love slowly, slowly, very slowly and then all at once in the back three of season 2. He was falling, falling, falling and then gone. Whereas Felicity’s love was more consistent - I’m talking tempo here. It grew bit by bit throughout the season and its foundations were actually laid in late season 1. It is difficult to separate the moment in which Felicity “FELL IN LOVE” with Oliver from everything else because her love for him has never been about grand gestures or pining or even saying the words or expecting him to love her back. Her love for him is tangled in with her absolute belief in him. It is entwined with her rock-solid conviction that he is a good man, a hero. Her love has been steadfast and constant; there’s no ebb and flow here and so there is no real ONE moment that you could point to and say “There. That’s the moment it all changed for her.”

The closest we can get is 2.06 and 2.07, which signified a colossal change in the way that both Oliver and Felicity viewed their relationship - even if they never spoke about it. Those are the moments in which it becomes apparent to us fans that there is something bubbling beneath the surface for both of them. Before then we could speculate and theorise and suggest, but those pivotal scenes are proof. I’d go with 2.07 over 2.06 to illustrate the extent of Felicity’s love for Oliver. She’s willing to die here, all so that he does not have to kill again. If that’s not love, what is?

anonymous asked:

Do you mind me asking why you don't like Emma anymore? I understand if you don't want to answer but Emma has always been my favorite character and I can't see why anyone would hate her. Hope you have a good day! Your blog is one of my favorites :-)

Thank you first of all <3 and I do hope your day is even better!

I don’t mind at all Nonnie. Emma has been one of my fav characters for 4 seasons but since season 5… here are some of my reasons I don’t like Emma anymore . But please keep in mind I respect it to 100% if you still love her. I’ll tag all my anti Emma posts.

So it all started with our heroes coming back to Storybrook without their memory..the memory Emma took to cover up that there was a second Dark One. She let her family believe they failed her that they let her down or did something horrible to her. Which they didn’t. You know how much this hurt them?

Emma ripped out the heart of a 13 year old girl to break her son’s heart…that was cruel and actually pretty horrible. It was something Cora would’ve done. And Emma never stood up for this never apologized for it.

Saving Hook against his will…that was for me one of the worst things somebody could do. She took away his chance to die a hero throwing him right back into the darkness. Emma tried to cheat death bringing everyone in danger and ignoring Hook’s own wishes. This was his life, his choice not hers.

From this moment on (already before but now it really got out of hand) all Emma cared about was Hook. Henry? Her parents? Regina? Everything Emma did and does is because of Hook. Remember the moment where Snow almost go choked to death? Emma didn’t even check on her all she cared about was Hook

Hook almost kills her entire family out of revenge…and all Emma does later is saying how unfair it is that he died…he was soley responsible for it. But Emma has nothing better to do then to drag her family to the Underworld. To safe the person who tried to kill her son, her parents, her best friend and her best friends boyfriend like two minutes ago. And yes I know they wanted to go willingly but is it really willingly if you daugther, mother, best friend goes to hell and you know bad things can happen to her there? Of course they go with her.

And also when we are in hell Emma keeps choosing Hook over the rest of her family. She indangers them over and over again because she couldn’t let go.

Emma has turned from a strong, brave and independent woman into a shadow of herself . When Hook says jump Emma ask how high. She puts him before her own child, she forgives him trying to kill her family without blinking an eye. Emma only exists for Hook anymore .

That is not the Emma Swan I fell in love with. She might be still in there somewhere deep buried but I fear it is too late for her.

I miss this Emma. I wanted to get more gifs but all Tumblr offers when you typ Emma Swan are Captain Swan ones. Emma is no own person anymore

Originally posted by guylinerjones

So that Naruto essay I promised, on the interview? Well, here it is: 

Sakura does love Naruto. That much has been made increasingly evident with the progression of Shippuden and/or Part II of the manga. We see multiple instances where her feelings between Sasuke and Naruto waiver, especially those involving Kakashi and Sai. If you deny Sakura having feelings for Naruto, then I’m afraid you’ll need to take classes for recognizing context clues. 

Anyways. Sakura has feelings for Naruto. We know that for sure. However, as Kishimoto said, it would be cruel of her now to try and carry a romantic relationship with Naruto. Haters, hold your tongues, pull up a chair, and for God’s sake, listen.

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dropbearaboveyou  asked:

Why do you think the reason that Valentina reacted more positively to Len's approach then Ray's? Is it because Ray came off as a little bit of a stalker?

Oh, for a ton of reasons. And oh god did this ever get long, so it’s under a cut.

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11x20 “Don’t Call Me Shurley”
“You are going to choose Amara over me.”

I know this scene must have caused a whole lot of conflicting emotions and uproar within the fandom judging from how many asks I received on this moment after the episode had aired. And while I have written about my impression of this moment here and there in replies already, I kind of feel the need to type out something a little more complete. Fair warning ahead, I think my reading of this scene will probably not be all too popular.

I have seen and read lots of disappointment over Dean breathing in the fog as most analyzed it as a drastic setback and similarly alarming action as when he overdosed on pills in 11x17 “Red Meat” because he thought Sam was dead and wanted to trade his life for Sam’s. While I agree that Dean’s readiness to die is unsettling, sad and downright infuriating at times, him breathing in the fog here didn’t feel at all comparable to 11x17 to me personally.

For one, I am pretty certain that when Dean took a breath he was expecting for it to have no effect on him given that Deputy Harris had told him as much before her co-worker shot her. I understand that this doesn’t change anything about how Dean still took the chance. I think though to just see this as another incident of Dean’s co-depdency showcasing that he thinks he is worth nothing without Sam I think slightly misses the point and oversimplifies or oversees some aspects that imo should be taken into consideration here.

For one imo the focus here is much more on Sam’s co-depdency rather than Dean’s as we see Sam afflicted with his darkest thoughts and those speak very clearly of how he deep down fears to lose Dean and not be the most important person in his brother’s life any longer. And to me the crux of the scene here to evaluate Dean’s following actions is that Sam voices concerns and fear that Dean himself knows.

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