Why don't I feel like I'm a good person?
because you’ve got the inside view.
see, you see all your nasty thoughts as they pass by. you feel all those mean impulses; you catch every terrible thing you think about a friend, you have to watch yourself procrastinate on important stuff and be lazy when you feel like you should be working. you get front-row seats to all the awfulness that comes with being a person. and you only get that view of yourself, not of anyone else. so naturally, since you can’t see all the internal flaws in everyone else, it seems like they don’t have them–but you do.
the secret is that everyone has those flaws.
if being a good person is something you strive for–if you keep those nasty thoughts inside your head instead of directing them at other people, if you support your friends instead of pushing them down, if you try your best at what you do–then i promise you, you’re a good person. and even if you fail at that stuff sometimes, all it takes to be a good person is to keep trying.
there’s nothing any more bad about you than there is about loads of other people.
ask your friends if you’re a good person–when it comes to things like this, they probably see you more clearly than you do yourself. trust them. if they say ‘yes, of course’ then you’ll know you don’t have to worry. if they say no, you can ask them why, and then strive to change those things about yourself.
just remember that if it seems like everyone else is a better person than you, it’s only because you can’t see what’s happening inside them. trust me–everyone struggles to do the right thing sometimes. even steve.
you’re a good person. even if you don’t feel like it.