i don't even feel sick i'm just tired

Letter to an ex-friend

I don’t say a lot of things on here but I need to say this somewhere because it’s unhealthy.
So I guess her I go.

I might say things to preserve your feelings but at this point in my life I don’t care I’m so sick of being walked all over I am very stressed right now about my job (which is a high paced environment so not overall that stressful out side of work) my new house which the only stressful part is waiting for my move in day. And yes my new puppy is making me slightly stressed because I don’t want to upset our neighbours that We have had for the last three years. But above all else it the stress I have at home that completely wrecks me I have spent three years pushing aside the stupid comments biting my tongue when I know I’m in the right and above all else being treated like trash that me cleaning and working and balancing a life is something that should be ashamed. I’m done I don’t care if you see this just know that you are the reason Im not be saying this to your face because. Yes I’m being a coward but your only good quality is your words you can make the biggest knife wound to the heart feel like it’s nothing and you don’t realize until long after what you meant. So I’m going to hide behind this post because I’m so sick of everything I’m done pulling my hair out and crying because of how pisssed off I am. Because let’s face it we’re not friends we haven’t been for years. I’m a proud 23 year old woman who has bought a house has a secure full time job and now I have a puppy that I already love dearly. What do you have? Student loans. No job. You say you leave the house but let’s face it your broke where do you go. Your grandmas. You don’t even text me to tell me hey I’m not feeling good I’m staying at my grandmas. I never know where you are and I’m always telling you where I am and what I’m doing it’s sick. So let’s face it I defiantly wouldn’t want your life and I defiantly don’t want your presence in my life anymore. I don’t need it. It’s toxic and I will finally stand up for myself. The only thing I ever care about is others feelings. Will this hurt them? Will this be the wrong thing? Do they like me? I always try so hard for peoples approval. And I’m done. I have cried my last tear over you (probably not) and I will hold my head up high and one day maybe we can talk again as strangers but never as friends.


found these scribbles while looking for something else

it makes me so super happy when people text me first because it’s like wow?? someone actually thought about me???? and decided to talk to me???? someone cares that much to take the time out to text me??¿???¿???

if you hate any of the boys because of their mistakes and overlook their kind hearts then don’t expect people to remember the good you did and don’t complain about them pointing out your wrongs.