to the anon about the 20yr old bf, the asks have very personal info and i dont know if you want them published so i will reply from here (also! i wasnt ignoring you or anything i was asleep). for me, it is really suspicious that you are together, i.e. he requested you keep it a secret from everyone so it means that he knows what he’s doing is wrong but wont stop -do your parents/siblings know? does anyone of your friends know about it? for your own safety somebody should know- like he knows its illegal and dangerous to be romantically/sexually involved with someone so so young but instead he asks for your silence! this is such a red flag and this silence could evolve into a lot more he can ask you not to tell anyone.
to be super honest with you, id tell someone close to you to get their opinion and i wouldnt stay in the relationship any longer. i mean you can get satisfaction from a relationship with another younger boy where you guys wont even have to keep it a secret and it wont be illegal —> you dont need that suspicious 20yr old in your life you can enjoy your teenage years with other teenagers that will satisfy your emotional (love, care, affection: all openly with no secrets) and sexual needs (without jt being illegal or awkward). your emotional, mental and physical safety is what matters here, not him. 💖(sorry to have made you wait it was like 2.30am)💖