i do not want to think about a lack of speech

Top Misconceptions People Have about Pulp-Era Science Fiction

A lot of people I run into have all kinds of misconceptions about what pulp-era scifi, from the 1920s-1950s, was actually like. 


“Pulp-Era Science Fiction was about optimistic futures.”

Optimistic futures were always, always vastly outnumbered by end of the world stories with mutants, Frankenstein creations that turn against us, murderous robot rebellions, terrifying alien invasions, and atomic horror. People don’t change. Then as now, we were more interested in hearing about how it could all go wrong. 

To quote H.L. Gold, editor of Galaxy Science Fiction, in 1952: 

“Over 90% of stories submitted to Galaxy Science Fiction still nag away at atomic, hydrogen and bacteriological war, the post atomic world, reversion to barbarism, mutant children killed because they have only ten toes and fingers instead of twelve….the temptation is strong to write, ‘look, fellers, the end isn’t here yet.’”

The movie Tomorrowland is a particulary egregious example of this tremendous misconception (and I can’t believe Brad Bird passed on making Force Awakens to make a movie that was 90 minutes of driving through the Florida swamps). In reality, pre-1960s scifi novels trafficked in dread, dystopian futures, and fear. There was simply never a time when optimistic scifi was overrepresented, even the boyish Jules Verne became skeptical of the possibilities of technology all the way at the turn of the century. One of the most famous pulp scifi yarns was Jack Williamson’s The Humanoids, about a race of Borg-like robots who so totally micromanage humans “for our own protection” that they leave us with nothing to do but wait “with folded hands.”


“Pulp scifi often featured muscular, large-chinned, womanizing main characters.”

Here’s the image often used in parodies of pulp scifi: the main character is a big-chinned, ultra-muscular dope in tights who is a compulsive womanizer and talks like Adam West in Batman. Whenever I see this, I think to myself…what exactly is it they’re making fun of?

It’s more normal than you think to find parodies of things that never actually existed. Mystery buffs and historians, for example, can’t find a single straight example of “the Butler did it.” It’s a thing people think is a thing that was never a thing, and another example would be the idea of the “silent film villain” in a mustache and top hat (which there are no straight examples of, either). There are no non-parody examples of Superman changing in a phone booth; he just never did this.

In reality, my favorite description of pulp mag era science fiction heroes is that they are “wisecracking Anglo-Saxon engineers addicted to alcohol and tobacco who like nothing better than to explain things to others that they already know.” The average pulp scifi hero had speech patterns best described as “Mid-Century American Wiseass” than like Adam West or the Lone Ranger. 

The nearest the Spaceman Spiff stereotype came to hitting the mark was with the magazine heroes of the Lensmen and Captain Future, and they’re both nowhere near close. Captain Future was a muscular hero with a chin, but he also had a Captain Picard level desire to use diplomacy first, and believed that most encounters with aliens were only hostile due to misunderstandings and lack of communication (and the story makes him right). He also didn’t seem interested in women, mostly because he had better things to do for the solar system and didn’t have the time for love. The Lensmen, on the other hand, had a ruthless, bloodthirsty streak, and were very much like the “murder machine” Brock Sampson (an attitude somewhat justified by the stakes in their struggle). 


“Pulp Era Scifi were mainly action/adventure stories with good vs. evil.” 

This is a half-truth, since, like so much other genre fiction, scifi has always been sugared up with fight scenes and chases. And there was a period, early in the century, when most scifi followed the Edgar Rice Burroughs model and were basically just Westerns or swashbucklers with different props, ray guns instead of six-shooters. But the key thing to remember is how weird so much of this scifi was, and that science fiction, starting in the mid-1930s, eventually became something other than just adventure stories with different trappings. 

One of my favorite examples of this is A. Bertram Chandler’s story, “Giant-Killer.” The story is about rats on a starship who acquire intelligence due to proximity to the star drive’s radiation, and who set about killing the human crew one by one. Another great example is Eando Binder’s Adam Link stories, told from the point of view of a robot who is held responsible for the death of his creator.

What’s more, one of the best writers to come out of this era is best known for never having truly evil bad guys: Isaac Asimov. His “Caves of Steel,” published in 1953, had no true villains. The Spacers, who we assumed were snobs, only isolated themselves because they had no immunities to the germs of earth.


“Racism was endemic to the pulps.”

It is absolutely true that the pulps reflected the unconscious views of society as a whole at the time, but as typical of history, the reality was usually much more complex than our mental image of the era. For instance, overt racism was usually shown as villainous: in most exploration magazines like Adventure, you can typically play “spot the evil asshole we’re not supposed to like” by seeing who calls the people of India “dirty monkeys” (as in Harold Lamb). 

Street & Smith, the largest of all of the pulp publishers, had a standing rule in the 1920s-1930s to never to use villains who were ethnic minorities because of the fear of spreading race hate by negative portrayals. In fact, in one known case, the villain of Resurrection Day was going to be a Japanese General, but the publisher demanded a revision and he was changed to an American criminal. Try to imagine if a modern-day TV network made a rule that minority groups were not to be depicted as gang bangers or drug dealers, for fear that this would create prejudice when people interact with minority groups in everyday life, and you can see how revolutionary this policy was. It’s a mistake to call this era very enlightened, but it’s also a mistake to say everyone born before 1970 was evil.


“Pulp scifi writers in the early days were indifferent to scientific reality and played fast and loose with science.”

 FALSE.

 This is, by an order of magnitude, the most false item on this list.

In fact, you might say that early science fiction fandom were obsessed with scientific accuracy to the point it was borderline anal retentive. Nearly every single one of the lettercols in Astounding Science Fiction were nitpickers fussing about scientific details. In fact, modern scifi fandom’s grudging tolerance for storytelling necessities like sound in space at the movies, or novels that use “hyperspace” are actually something of a step down from what the culture around scifi was in the 1920s-1950s. Part of it was due to the fact that organized scifi fandom came out of science clubs; Hugo Gernsback created the first scifi pulp magazine as a way to sell electronics and radio equipment to hobbyists, and the “First Fandom” of the 1930s were science enthusiasts who talked science first and the fiction that speculated about it second.

In retrospect, a lot of it was just plain obvious insecurity: in a new medium considered “kid’s stuff,” they wanted to show scifi was plausible, relevant, and something different from “fairy tales.” It’s the same insecure mentality that leads video gamers to repeatedly ask if games are art. You’ve got nothing to prove there, guys, calm down (and take it from a pulp scifi aficionado, the most interesting things are always done in the period when a medium is considered disposable trash). 

One of the best examples was the famous Howard P. Lovecraft, who published “The Shadow out of Time” in the 1936 issue of Astounding. Even though it might be the only thing from that issue that is even remotely reprinted today, the letters page from this issue practically rose up in revolt against this story as not being based on accurate science. Lovecraft was never published in Astounding ever again.

If you ever wanted to find out what Star Wars would be like if they were bigger hardasses about scientific plausibility, check out E.E. Smith’s Lensman series. People expect a big, bold, brassy space opera series with heroes and villains to play fast and loose, but it was shockingly scientifically grounded.

To be fair, science fiction was not a monolith on this. One of the earliest division in science fiction was between the Astounding Science Fiction writers based in New York, who often had engineering and scientific backgrounds and had left-wing (in some cases, literally Communist) politics, and the Amazing Stories writers based in the Midwest, who were usually self taught, and had right-wing, heartland politics. Because the Midwestern writers in Amazing Stories were often self-taught, they had a huge authority problem with science and played as fast and loose as you could get. While this is true, it’s worth noting science fiction fandom absolutely turned on Amazing Stories for this, especially when the writers started dabbling with spiritualism and other weirdness like the Shaver Mystery. And to this day, it’s impossible to find many Amazing Stories tales published elsewhere.

hedgehogwithatank  asked:

What new vegas features do you miss the most in f4?

honestly? the writing. New Vegas had excellent writing, from the plot to the characters to just the dialogue options available to the courier. Having a voice is nice but with the limited dialogue you just can’t roleplay the same way you could in NV. Sole can only either be a bit of a dick, a totally nice guy or a smartass, while the courier can be anything from a complete moron, to an insufferable know-it-all, a smooth talker, a bit of a slut, a violent brute, a sarcastic douche, a by-the-book hero, a quiet badass and anything in between. 

And while we’re on dialogue, I really miss the Skill Check dialogue system from NV. You either had the skill needed to get certain things (or just finish quests on an alternate path) or you didn’t, and it was always clear because you got a display that told you how high  of a skill you needed (like “Speech [25/30]). Most importantly, if you didn’t have the needed skill, the actual dialogue would change, giving a good reason why the NPC you were talking to would react differently than if you had said the right thing. Plus some of the failed dialogue checks were some of the funniest parts of the game.

In FO4, if you pass a speech check or not is determined entirely by chance. You can have a CHA stat of 10 and still fail. Then you reload, your character says the exact same thing in the exact same context to the same character at the same time AND NOW IT WORKS FOR SOME REASON. That’s annoying busywork and kind of breaks my immersion. They had the same thing in FO3 where your chance of  success in speech checks was given in percentages and I didn’t like it there either.

I also like that the courier’s backstory was kept relatively vague, so you could make up  your own story for your character. FO4 gives you a pre-baked background that is pretty lukewarm for my tastes and doesn’t leave much room to make up your own character interpretation (unless you do some hard retconning/headcanon action to get around that, but even then it’s not amazing).

But other than that, New Vegas generally just didn’t take itself as seriously as FO4. FO4 has all this big focus on how miserable everyone is and how shitty life in the wasteland is. There is so much drama with families being torn apart, everyone being afraid of the Institute, the Brotherhood stomping about the place, children dying of incurable diseases…it is all so dark and serious and miserable it gets exhausting after a while.

New Vegas has dark stuff too, with drug use, slavery, prostitution, bureaucratic fuckery costing lives, war crimes, lack of medical aid, lack of food and fresh water and power, economic inequality…i could go on. So it absolutely has serious and dark issues. I mean one of the companion characters mercy killed his pregnant wife to spare her the horrors of slavery for fuck’s sake.

But you know what it also has? Ghouls flying to the moon. A gang of grannies in pink dresses beating people to death with rolling pins. Cyberdogs. A big blue grandma who looks like hulk and wears a cute flower hat. A gang of elvis impersonators. at least two (2) robots who think they’re cowboys. People cosplaying ancient romans. A dude wearing a dog for a hat. A giant plastic dinosaur with a store inside that sells tiny plastic dinosaur souvenirs. A sexbot called “FISTO” that you can hire for yourself if you wish.

What I’m trying to say is, New Vegas had a lot of serious themes (I’d argue them being even portrayed better than in FO4 but that’s a matter of opinion). But at the same time it didn’t lose it’s sense of humor. This is a world where science can make people live 200 years, create super mutants by dipping people in green goo, and radiation is basically magic. It’s not super serious all the time or tragic. Might as well have some fun with it. Fallout has a long history of dark comedy after all.

FO4 kinda lost the humor aspect and maybe it’s personal preference, but I never liked media where everything is just sad and miserable all the time because you get kinda tired of it and desensitized after a while. I don’t hate it or anything, but it can never reach the same place in my heart fnv did ;-;

god sorry for the novel i could just talk about fnv all day

anonymous asked:

is having a ginormous fat peen a deal breaker for you? yano cuz u short

Anonymous looked up at the sky, not trusting the colour smeared upon the horizon. Horizons could be misleading, they knew. Horizons could convince you it was still daylight, even when the whole of the sky arced above you in a sprawl of midnight. Looking forward was not always enough. Sometimes, you had to look up. 

Directly above Anonymous, the moon cut its teeth into the clouds, drawing blood and bruising the darkness with its waxen light, waning at the edges. It was time. 

They did not have long. The witch had told them, as she reluctantly handed them the bag of herbs, that the spell would only be useful for the minute or so that the moon was at its highest. The minute was upon them. 

Fifty five seconds left. 

Cursing themself for having lost track of time, Anonymous reached into their trouser pocket and pulled out the little drawstring bag. With hands shaking in anticipation, they emptied the contents into the small well they’d dug into the earth all those hours ago, and covered it back over with dirt. Fingers crossed behind their back, they stepped away and waited.

It did not happen immediately. Magic takes time, the witch had said. Magic does not come to you when you ask for it; it comes to you when it’s good and ready. You can cast all the spells you like, scatter all the herbs and make all the offerings, but magic cannot be summoned - only tempted. 

The seconds ticked by, and Anonymous waited.

This had been a long time coming, they reflected. They had waited too long for the taste of power on their lips. They had been too long distant from how it felt to be in control. They had learnt too early their place in the world, and they had too soon come to rue it. The chasm between want and have had grown inexorably bigger since the day they were born, and now they were here. 

The mound of earth did not move. Anonymous thought about the time they had first felt insignificant - the first time they had realised that they stood small in the face of all things - and counted the seconds. 

With ten seconds left before the spell died, the magic came. 

Magic has no face, has no body. It takes no form and it holds no weight. The witch had told Anonymous this herself. Magic simply is; it is because no other word will do, but it is not. It cannot be, and has never been, and yet it is. 

When Anonymous thought about it, it was all rather complicated.

Best, then, not to think at all. Best to give voice to thought and make it speech. 

Anonymous cleared their throat and began. 

“I suppose you’re wondering why I summoned you here - ” 

I was not summoned. 

They flushed, the soundless sound surprising them even though they had been expecting it. Do not fear the voiceless voice, the witch had warned. It speaks, and is silent. The words are only half your own. 

Breathing slowly, they tried again. 

“No, of course not. Sorry. I’m not - I haven’t used magic before.” 

And you still have not. I am not here to be used. Say what you would have, and I will do the same. This is not a service. This is a trade.

“Right. Yes. Sorry.” They inhaled, exhaled. This was the only chance they would have to resolve the conflict that had been the shape of all their life. This was the resolution of aporia; of feeling as though they deserved everything, yet having nothing. Of knowing that they should be free, but being everywhere in chains. Of wanting, and of not having. “I want to feel powerful.” 

In what sense? Power is not all-encompassing. The queen ant is powerful to the workers, but weak to the heel of the boot. What power would you hold? Do you seek to command nations, or to master the arts, or to take another as your own? 

Anonymous considered how best to formulate their response before replying. Precision was key here. The witch had made it clear that magic would grant you what you asked, whether or not it was exactly what you wanted. 

“I’m tired of being silent,” they said eventually. “I’m tired of being unable to say whatever I want. I’m sick to the teeth of thinking all these thoughts - great thoughts, too; thoughts that could topple cities and part seas - and being forced to keep them to myself, all because other people think that their own feelings are more important. Well, what of my feelings? What of feeling inadequate? What of the weight of being told to keep silent? Do they know what that does to a person?”

As they spoke, they could feel their heartbeat rise, pumping and roaring in their ears, in their veins. “Sorry,” they added. “I’m getting carried away. But to answer your question - I want to have the power to speak my mind.”

In all things?

They contemplated it. “Yes. In all things.”

The silence was real for a few moments before it became illusion.

I can help you.

“And will you?” 

Yes. It will require exchange, however.

At these words, Anonymous could hardly contain their excitement. “Anything. I’ll give you anything.” They took their purse out from their other pocket, and held it out towards the mound. “I have money. I have a house, too, but that’s back in town. You mightn’t like it there. My neighbours - ”

I would have your face.

Anonymous faltered. “My what?”

Your face. That is my offer. I will give you unlimited and unprecedented power to speak your mind. All thoughts you have will be given voice, and you will never again be forced to turn away from speaking aloud what you have always been taught to keep silent. In return for this extraordinary power, I would take from you your face, and in so doing I would give myself form and body. You would never again be silent; I would never again be invisible. 

“But wouldn’t I suffer without a face? How would anyone know that it was me who was speaking?” Anonymous asked, wringing their hands around their purse. 

I have named my payment. Now I would name my price. The price of this power is thus: the knowledge that all thoughts you give voice to will be dampened by your lack of face. That everything you ever say to another will be tempered by your lack of identity. That no-one will again know whose thoughts you speak; only that you do speak, and in all things. 

There was nothing for it. They would have to decline. They could not accept these terms. What power came at such a price, after all? What king had ever ruled his country with no name or face? What lover had ever made another theirs with no identity? 

All the times they had been asked to hold their tongue; all the times they had been scolded for speaking their mind; all the times they had uttered the wrong words at the wrong time and had suffered for it: all this had been for nothing. 

Although, Anonymous admitted to themself, the thought did appeal on one front, and one front alone. It was undeniable that a certain freedom was gained by completely giving up one’s identity. After all, who could be held accountable for a deed when the deed was done by one with neither name nor face? Who would they scold when the words that were given were not the words that were wanted? Who would suffer when the things said were not things that people wanted to hear?

Only those who heard them, of course, and not the one who spoke them. 

And immediately, ashamedly, wonderfully, the decision was already made, had perhaps been made years ago. 

“It’s a deal.” 

You agree to the payment and price?

“I do. Take my face, and give me the power I seek.”

The deal is struck.

And then the moon, which had begun to falter at its peak, was suddenly once more at its highest. The minutes had been returned. 

Hand trembling, Anonymous reached up to touch their face, only to find that, of course, there was no face. Where their image had been - the folds of their mouth, the curve of their nose - was now smooth and featureless. There was nothing there at all.

“Are you happy?” came a voice from behind them. 

Anonymous whirled around, and came face to face with their own face, worn by another. “Who are you?” they asked, and a thrill chased up their spine at the realisation that there was no fear behind these words at all. Their voice did not falter. The question was biting, crystalline.

“I am Magic,” replied the impostor, “given form by our deal. Is it to your satisfaction?” It cocked its head inquisitively, Anonymous’ old eyes seeking validation in their new setting, and Anonymous felt powerful. They were looking at their old self - their weaker, voiceless self - and they were free.

Anonymous drew a deep breath in before responding. “is having a ginormous fat peen a deal breaker for you?” they asked.

Magic blinked. “I don’t understand.” 

“yano,” continued Anonymous, “cuz u short.”

“Why are you saying that?” asked Magic, eyes darting left to right in placid uncertainty. “I don’t understand. I gave you what you wanted. You could say anything you wanted, and no-one would ever hold you accountable. You could take a lover with intricately crafted sonnets, bend ears with your scintillating rhetoric, and yet you choose - ”

“is having a ginormous fat peen a deal breaker for you? yano cuz u short,” interjected Anonymous, feeling giddy and drunk with power.

Magic blinked again. “You have the choice of a thousand languages, billions of words - ”

“is having a ginormous fat peen - ”

“Sometimes,” Magic interrupted, “silence is the more powerful weapon after all. I could undo what I have done, but I think it best not to bother. Some people will never learn. I wish you luck with all things, and may you one day find your power useful, for it will not aid you in the pursuit you have chosen.”

With that, Magic was gone, and Anonymous’ face was lost to them forever. Now alone, Anonymous looked gleefully at the small mound of earth that had been their salvation. They thought of all the things they would say tomorrow, and they smiled.

At least, they would have smiled, had they been able.

Far away, Magic rolled its new eyes, and decided to write a sonnet. 

The Things We Give Welsh Learners: y Babi Sinsir

So I was going through our bookshelf yesterday, because we’re fast approaching the point where we need a clear-out, and I came across one of my all-time favourite creations ever, probably even beating shit like the wheel and penicillin. Years back, before leaving The Man to pursue his dreams of being a sort of professional clown-thing, my husband used to be a translator for Neath Port Talbot Council; as is often the way with Welsh councils, though, owing to a lack of money and also everywhere is really close to each other (this country is 150 miles wide at its widest point, and about 47 miles at the thin bit. Ver ver small), NPT Council’s translating department was shared by Swansea Council. Thus it was that, in the halcyon days of circa 2009, the two decided to team up and produce a new Welsh language book for learners between them, and thus it got sent through to Steffan to proof read it.

A Thing You May Not Know: Welsh is one of ten indigenous languages to Britain, arguably the oldest, and has been viciously oppressed over the last millennium and a half as part of England’s big If You Destroy Their Culture They’ll Be Glad To Be Ruled By You policy. These days, it’s nonetheless still spoken by approximately a fifth of the Welsh population; a hell of a feat, considering, but the suppression of it continues to this day (just in cleverer, sneakier ways now than whipping people’s children if they’re heard.) But it is classified as Endangered. Thanks to Welsh-language schools now being a thing (though supply is much lower than demand), transmission rates to the younger generation are pretty good; but, Welsh is peculiarly dependent on adult learners.

This means that learner books might have to appeal to both children and adults while using very simple language, which I explain in case it in some way justifies the bewildering weirdness of what I’m about to show you; because at first glance, this book is simply for children. But it’s… Well. 

Well.

I present to you, with translations in bold and commentary by me, Y Babi Sinsir.

Literally, “the Ginger Baby”, but they mean ‘ginger’ as in ‘gingerbread’. Literal ginger. Not the colour.

This is Mr Jones. This is Mrs Jones.

What’s wrong, Mrs Jones? I want a baby.

Note: there will be some confusion in this book about whether the narrator is speaking, or anyone else. It might seem cut and dried here, but there are no speech marks around “Dw i eisiau babi”, whereas later speech marks are used, and also in two pages’ time the narrator will actively pass a value judgement using first person, so… Well.

But, so far so good.

Mrs Jones is making a Babi Sinsir.

… okay, so I like this page because of the capitalisation of Babi Sinsir and the lack of definite article. She’s just making a Babi Sinsir. You know, a Babi Sinsir? Magical baby made of gingerbread that you make if you can’t conceive but can’t afford IVF? Yeah. A Babi Sinsir. That’s right.

Let it be known that this is Not A Thing in Welsh folklore or mythology. What the fuck. How does this work. Where does the magic come from? Do you need a faerie ingredient? Will the next page tell us?

This is the Babi Sinsir. I like the Babi Sinsir.

Nope.

But it is apparently shit-capable and needs a nappy. It’s good that the narrator likes it anyway.

The Babi Sinsir is bad. He’s running.

Uh oh.

“Come back, Babi Sinsir.”

Look how Worried the Joneses are. Funny how they don’t seem to be calling that enthusiastically, though. I’d have expected an exclamation mark at least. Did Mrs Jones always have a massive left arm? I can’t remember.

“Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Yeah, okay, so that’s the Welsh for “Run! Run! As fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread man!”, but once again, I’m going to have to draw attention to the lack of expressive punctuation here. It really feels like this naughty Babi Sinsir’s heart is just not in this.

“Come and help, Mr Horse.” “Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Cool, look, a floating horse has come to help.

The pen there, incidentally, was an attempt by the translators to work out who was talking. I can’t imagine why. This dialogue is on fire, everyone can tell.

“Come and help, Mrs Cow.” “Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Now they have been joined in their high-speed zombie shuffle by a married floating cow who is, if I’m not much mistaken, high as shit.

“Come and help, Mr Goat.”  “Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

I’m starting to suspect the artist only knew how to draw the legs on animals in one way.

“Come and help, Mr Dog.”  “Run, run, Catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Yes, that dog is definitely here to ‘help’. Also… the Babi Sinsir is literally within reach of Mrs Jones’ massive left arm now. Why is she not just picking him up?

“Come and help, Miss Cat.” “Run, run, Catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

You may be wondering at this point if this is just… the whole book. An ever-increasing flock of floating zombie creatures shuffling after a naughty gingerbread baby in a nappy who is committing the cardinal sin of running. I mean… where can they go from here, amirite? A sheep? A squirrel? A chicken? We can hit a hundred pages this way, easy. The concern is the artist, whom I think was stretched a bit beyond their means on this project anyway.

BUT WORRY NOT! Shit’s about to go down, guys.

Oh no! Here comes Mr Wolf. Mr Wolf runs and catches the Babi Sinsir.

THAT IS A FOX

THAT IS A GODDAMN FOX YOU HEATHEN FUCK

WHAT THE FUCK

AND WHY THE FUCK IS IT WEARING CLOTHES WHEN NONE OF THE OTHER ANIMALS WERE

WHY IS IT DRESSED IN DUNGAREES LIKE A LAZY FARMHAND ON AN AMERICAN RANCH IN THE 1800S

This doesn’t bode well for the -

Half of the Babi Sinsir is left.

WHAT THE

Quarter of the Babi Sinsir is left.

WHY DOES IT STILL LOOK SAD AND HORRIFIED WHY IS IT STILL ALIVE OH MY GOD

The Babi Sinsir has gone! There’s tasty.

What the

Wha

It

I realise this is not the main point to make here, but two pages ago it had eaten half of that nappy, and now it’s whole again and delicately discarded to one side, I just want

I mean

It’s okay, right? This happens in fairytales? Little Red Riding Hood? Someone will eviscerate the fox and out will come the Babi Sinsir…’s pieces, and they can be baked back together…?

No one cares!

Mrs Jones is making another Babi Sinsir.

The new Babi Sinsir loves Mrs Jones.

… 

…okay, so there’s a lot for us all to take in right now, and we’re all going to get through it at different speeds. But I’m just going to draw attention to the fact that Mr Jones is now merely depicted as a picture on the wall, and the new Babi Sinsir apparently only loves Mrs Jones, and…

Okay so they just lost their beloved baby gingerbread son because he got eaten alive by a fox in dungarees calling itself a wolf, right? Mrs Jones apparently couldn’t give less of a fuck if she tried, as long as she has some flour and ginger left over to make another. This one she made to love her.

Mr Jones, I presume, had a total mental breakdown and drank himself to death. At the very least, he’s left her, look. All she has left is the photo.

But does dim ots! Mae’r Babi Sinsir newydd yn caru Mrs Jones.

And that is the story of Y Babi Sinsir, aka the greatest work of literature ever written.

Art Therapy

Request: I was wondering if you would write something were the reader and Bucky fell in love, but Natasha was really horrible and told the reader to stay away from Bucky, Bucky doesn’t understand why

@melconnor2007

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader [Enhanced]

Word Count: 6,658

Bucky lay in bed staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t sleep most nights. The rare times when he could, his mind was plagued with nightmares. The doctors in Wakanda had assured him that it was perfectly normal. His psychiatrist at the Avengers compound told him that the therapy would help with it. He even had a prescription for sleeping pills after he mentioned his insomnia. But Bucky didn’t like taking them, the feeling of something making his mind hazy was too close to how he used to be while under Hydra’s control.

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anonymous asked:

Is kaneki really not fighting for coexistance like takizawa said??

Oh, definitely. It’s very obvious even in this chapter alone that Kaneki is disconnected from the perspective of most ghouls. That is why when all the ghouls are depressed because they are losing the media battle, Kaneki is naively thinking this is an opportunity for them. 

I’ll elaborate what I mean under the cut. 

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Daryl's sexuality and romantic life

I am one of those people who has been watching TWD from the beginning. And I’ve read Daryl as gay pretty early on. I considered it a possibility in season one simply because we didn’t have a gay character at that point and I thought Daryl may end up being gay as his sexuality was undefined (unlike everyone else). Season two was what really made me think that Daryl was gay. The episode when he’s searching for Sophia and he starts hallucinating Merle, and Merle calls him Darlene and challenges his masculinity made me really wonder. We know that Daryl was abused, and there are many reasons he could have been but the fact that he feels insecure about being seen as feminine is worth noting. We see the same thing when Merle meets Rick and calls Daryl his bitch.

So, Daryl has an abusive past, and we don’t entirely know if there were specific reasons he was abused.

Season 2-4 we see Daryl become close with two different women, but he never expresses romantic or sexual interest in either one of them. Obviously Beth is dead now, but with Carol there’s still ZERO romantic or sexual tension/chemistry between them. They’re close friends, but unlike with richonne, it doesn’t feel like their friendship is building up to anything more.

And now let’s move forward a bit to the last couple of seasons. The group moves into Alexandria. Daryl, predictably, doesn’t fit in. In fact, he only ever interacts with his own people and doesn’t make an effort to socialize with anyone from the safe zone. Oh, except for Aaron, Eric, and Denise. Obviously I understand that gay people don’t only hang out with other gay people, but it’s an interesting character choice to have Daryl bonding only with the LGBT members of ASZ and no one else.

And then we meet Jesus. The first people he interacts with are Daryl and Rick. That entire episode’s interaction is like a ridiculous post-apocalyptic meet-cute (and clearly Rick ships it😉). Fast forward one episode later, and directly after the group scene with Jesus, Abraham approaches Daryl and asks if he’s ever going to find someone to settle down with. This is HUGE. No one has ever asked Daryl about that kind of stuff. No one has ever questioned him on romantic prospects. And it’s interesting that Abraham uses a gender neutral term as opposed to saying something like “are you ever gonna find a nice woman”. The writers are drawing attention to Daryl’s romantic/sexual life. There needs to be a reason for that.

After this, Daryl and Jesus are separated for quite a while. But the first time they separate, Daryl is with Denise and Rosita and Jesus is with Tara and Gabriel. And again this is interesting because both Denise and Tara talk about their relationship and romance (Denise to Daryl and Rosita, Tara to Jesus and Gabriel). Denise make an impassioned death speech about not letting fear stop you from going after what you want and pursuing what makes you happy.

And then what? Well Daryl gets taken by Negan’s group, Jesus ends up there for reconnaissance, and stays behind to help Daryl escape. And we are specifically shown that Daryl is why Jesus stays. Like that man had his ticket out and the moment he realized Daryl was there, he is off that damn truck. Then last week, Jesus casually comes out. It was done in such an innocuous way but at least alerts audiences who may not be familiar with the comic to his preferences. And it doesn’t do so the way it does in the comic, where we are made privy to Jesus’ sexuality by meeting his boyfriend. There may be an Alex, but if so, we haven’t met him. Now this week, he and Daryl are basically attached at the hip. i’m not saying that pairing the two up on missions means that they are going to hook the characters up. But they are teaming Daryl and Jesus up at least and getting the audience used to seeing them together.

I’m not saying this means definitively that they are going to make this Canon. I have major doubts that they will. But I am saying that narrative foreshadowing is supportive of a relationship between Daryl and Jesus. The writers have now gone out of their way seven seasons in to actually draw attention to Daryl’s lack of a romantic life (via Abraham and Denise). To me something like that is only brought up if it’s going to be resolved. And my question is, who is Daryl going to be with? The only woman he has ever really shown any closeness to is Carol, but he’s never shown attraction toward her. And I find it highly unlikely that some rando woman is going to just appear and make Daryl suddenly go gaga. That really wouldn’t fit with what we know of him.

The writers may deny it, but they’ve certainly done a nice subtle job of setting up a possible Daryl/Jesus romance.

(Also a little side note about Daryl’s sexuality: I also think both Carol and Rick know, even if Daryl has never actually come out to them officially. Carol making that joke at the prison about she and Daryl hooking up and then later her bunk bed comments when they were on the road are just so winky. And with Rick there’s literally no reason for him to be all nudge nudge when it comes to Jesus.)

anonymous asked:

I saw your comment on Facebook and I wanted to tell you this... I don't like your profile because you like Sakura and you don't like Hinata, she's sweet, besides, Hinata was the only one who helped Naruto to react when Obito said cruel words, she touched his face to help him, she gave a speech for Naruto, she isn't selfish, that nobody did.... neither Sakura or Sasuke! that's why Hinata is the best, ignorants!

Jesus… here we go.

I saw your comment on Facebook and I wanted to tell you this…

Why do you do it here and not on Facebook? What did you do to find me on Tumblr? Should I take better care of myself? I mean, did you just look for me for this? Really? You can not be serious. ._.

I don’t like your profile because you like Sakura and you don’t like Hinata, she’s sweet

You said it: YOUR.

It is my account, my profile, my choice, my consideration, my taste, my thinking. Not yours.

I do not care if you say that she is sweet, if for me it is not, it is not.

Hinata was the only one who helped Naruto to react when Obito said cruel words (that nobody did…. neither Sakura or Sasuke!)

I would not be so sure. Do you know who helped Naruto to react WITHOUT the need to touch his face or something else? Sasuke Uchiha.

And not only that, but Naruto made everyone know his true feelings. They felt his heart and knew his pain by not always reaching Sasuke.

Naruto also reminded his loved ones that died and that’s exactly what motivated Naruto to go fight with Sasuke. He did not want to miss an opportunity again.

And his words confirm what I said.

she isn’t selfish

Shikamaru was about to die, but he got up because he decided to help Naruto after feeling his heart. That motivated him and helped him not to want to die.

Everyone was glad when they saw that Shikamaru was better. 

But, you know, Hinata does not care about anyone other than Naruto-kun. Please, we’re talking about one her comrades! 

she gave a speech for Naruto (that nobody did…. neither Sakura or Sasuke!) 

Are you sure? 

Surprise! Gaara and Sakura say hello.

she touched his face to help him (that nobody did…. neither Sakura or Sasuke!)

Where have I seen this before?

Oh, it’s true. :D

that’s why Hinata is the best, ignorants!

And that’s why I don’t like Hinata, so thanks, you just made me show the character’s lack of originality. :)

It’s funny that you always want to get Hinata where she does not belong. That does not work for me because the manga shows you totally the opposite. I’m sorry. 

(I talked about the fourth ninja war, but when you want, I can show you more.)

ZODIAC LIES EXPLAINED

Stereotypes are never accurate, but the astrological ones are plain ridiculous in their lack of logic. With this post, I hope to clear up any ignorance and confusion surrounding these parts of the signs. (PS: I was having a lot of trouble finding Pisces criticism, so excuse or enjoy the bias at the end. Heh.)

Aries are constantly angry, ready to fight, and selfish as hell.” The Aries sign is ruled by Mars, but Mars is not the Planet of the friggin’ Brawl – it’s about intensity and acting upon your impulses. Aries, being the first or “youngest” of the Zodiac, is obviously the most impulsive, but that doesn’t instantly mean they’re violent. It just means they’re ruled by Mars. They might be selfish because Aries is, again, the baby sign; everything is about them because that’s what their place in the Zodiac wheel is. It’s about beginning, or starting anew.

Taurus are lazy, always hungry, always eating, and slovenly.” Taurus is an Earth sign; Earth signs are very focused on the physical realm and all the greatness that can come of it. Taurus is the sign that is most focused on being comfortable and satisfied with their material world. Ruled by Venus, the Taurus sign reasonably enjoys the finer things in life, which includes furniture, food, and clothing. They won’t be slobs if they like to be beautiful and to be surrounded by equally beautiful things. Just stop. On the other hand, the “stubborn” argument can swing both ways, so why not call them determined instead of lazy?

Gemini are two-faced liars with no real personality and all they do is gossip.” Gemini is probably the most quick-thinking of the signs. They are ruled by Mercury, and therefore ruled by thought and speech. They have too many ideas to keep it all to themselves. It’s impossible for a human, let alone a human born under one of the most complex astrological signs, to not have a few hypocritical notions, but just because they tell you a lot of them doesn’t mean they believe all of them, nor all at once. (Half of the time, they’re probably only bouncing those theories off you to see what you think about them.) Mercury is also the planet of learning, so they may be constantly growing past their old feelings and discarding them as they move on to something new.

Cancer are hopeless cry-babies who can’t live without their mommy.” Excuse you. The Cancer sign IS the mommy. Cancer is the sign of home, history, and motherhood, and if they’re ruled by the moon (the luminary of emotion), how could you expect them to not be emotional? (Mind the definition of emotional, would you?) Cancer is also the Cardinal Water sign, meaning they can be efficacious self-starters who don’t need to follow in anyone’s footsteps to get where they want to go. Even if they’re anxious, they’re also generally shy and private, so keeping all those fears to themselves and never asking for help only makes them more self-reliant and brave, whether they’re aware of it or not.

Leo are the most arrogant, self-absorbed, vain people of the Zodiac… However, they’re the most beautiful, so they do have a point.” Leo is the sign that is ruled by the Sun; the Sun is about oneself and one’s ego. There’s nothing arrogant or self-centered about knowing you’re important or valuable and if all you’ve experienced with Leos is belligerence and egocentrism, then that’s your own bad luck. Leo has actually been characterized as friendly and attention-giving. And while every sign is beautiful, Taurus and Libra are ruled by Venus, so if anyone’s going to be stereotyped as the prettiest, it should be them. Leo just wants to be known to every living person as the King or Queen of the Jungle and it’d be heresy to not look the part.

Virgo are neat- and health-freak robots! They’re cute socially awkward bookworms though, so we forgive them.” Virgo is another Earth sign, and as stated above, the Earth element is all about life on earth. Like Taurus, Virgo strives for perfection of lifestyle and self, but on a much deeper level. That doesn’t mean that’s all they care about – it’s just one of the many things that are important to them. This sign is also ruled by Mercury, the planet of thought, so (that “robot” argument is completely out the window) it’s ridiculous to assume they’re all shy and prone to stuttering. They’re analytical and calculating and it’s very common for them to speak clearly, precisely, perfectly, able to get their point across in a succinct and exact manner. You got one thing right, though – they are damn cute.

Libra are soulless divas who only care about their fake friends and lipstick. They’re passive, feckless, and so indecisive that they couldn’t just PICK SOMETHING to save their life.” Libra is ruled by Venus, the planet of beauty and love; they are drawn to what they think looks nice, and there’s nothing wrong with having a keen eye for pulchritude. They are the Cardinal Air sign, and that mixture of values (leadership, self-reliance & social justice and progression) results in a great need to be fair; Libra sees from everyone’s point of view and this leads them to very vacillating places, but is that really a bad thing? They don’t lack a backbone; I think sometimes they just don’t know how to use it.

Scorpio are murderous sex-fiends who probably have blood orgies in the basement every Friday night for Satan.” Scorpio is ruled by the planets Mars and Pluto; that is an explosive combination of very intense energies, and thus Scorpio is the most intense Zodiac sign. They are known for being very emotional (as a Water sign) and prone to extremes (as the inhabitant of the eighth house), but as with Aries, this doesn’t have to make them volatile. They are driven and often controlled by their feelings and urges, but statistically, most serial killers are not Scorpios, so… There goes that argument.

Sagittarius probably don’t have any bone in their body that hasn’t been broken at least once because they’re so stupid and reckless.” Sagittarius is a Fire sign, making them very vital and dynamic people. They are adventurous, impulsive, and most of all, defined by the pursuit of personal freedom; they hate chains and confines more than anything. They’re known for making a lot of mistakes, but those mistakes are the way Sagittarians learn best, and because this sign is ruled by Jupiter (the planet associated with good luck, morals, and life paths), what these people learn is often laden with incredibly valuable and profound philosophies.

Capricorn do nothing but work, work, work. They’re too uptight to function.” Capricorn is the Cardinal Earth sign; they are characterized by their efficacy, determined nature, and great drive to succeed. They yearn to be the best that they can be and because of this, they often find themselves trapped in a place where they’re only capable of focusing on what they want to have and grow into. This doesn’t mean they can never leave that place, but depending on other parts of the Capricorn person’s chart, they may not want to. They are known as the most serious of the Zodiac only because they’re ruled by Saturn, the planet with a stick up its ass. (Every Capricorn I know is goofy as hell, so there’s that.)

Aquarius are weirdo aliens who come up with conspiracy theories for fun and feeling nothing is their number one hobby.” Aquarius is ruled by Uranus, the planet of uniqueness and dissent. They are next to Sagittarius in terms of freedom of thought. Driven by expansion of the mind and progression of self and the collective, Aquarius has the biggest ideas of the Zodiac, and being an Air sign, they want to share them. However, Aquarius are prone to feeling distant and disconnected, and they tend to behave as if that’s where they want to stay – on the outside. They want to be different. They are often dissatisfied with the current state of everything and they believe they will be the sign to make positive changes. They are off-beat, yes, but in their mind, that’s the best thing to be.

Pisces only smoke weed, sleep, and pretend to be hipster, but they’re just fish. Fish can’t be hipster.” Pisces is ruled by Neptune, the planet of imagination and illusions; Pisces is the most creative sign of the Zodiac, and that results in them leaning toward slightly unconventional ideas and habits. However, it is the Mutable Water sign, making Pisceans adaptable, emotional, and often passive people. This stereotype seems to imply that Pisces have little to no personality, but Pisces is a deep, dynamic, profound sign, and as proof of its gentle magnificence, I offer this collection of precise, hard-hitting Tumblr hate directed at it: *crickets chirping* Oh, right. There is none. Because Pisces is perfect.

anonymous asked:

How do I make my dialogue seem more authentic and less formulaic?

Hi, anon!  Thanks for your question :)

This is a common issue, and one that I’ve been working on in recent years.  Improving primarily comes from observation – listening to real-life conversations, watching experienced actors, and even recording your own thoughts/speech/monologues.  Writing good dialogue means that you have to analyze and pick apart speech patterns that our brains usually filter out.  It’s all about hypervigilance.  This is how you collect the tools you need.


Features of Authentic Dialogue

Notice the use of the word “features” – because it’s not just words or phrases that create dialogue you can hear in your head.  Speech patterns, interplay between characters, silences, and environmental factors can make a conversation come to life.  So when dialogue is sounding stale or formulaic, try some of the following:

  • Favored terms – The number one thing that really pulls me into dialogue is when I see a character use the same term/phrase a few times throughout the story.  That’s how real people speak!  We have cliches that we grew up hearing or that stick in our head, and we use them whenever they apply.  So build character with this tool.
  • Delay and “loading” phrases – Formulaic dialogue is made up of straightforward skeleton sentences: “I’m sorry I lied to you.  I was scared.”  Adding in delay makes time for characters to think, which helps readers hear their voices: “I, uh… I’m sorry, you know.  For lying.  I guess I was just scared.”
  • Unfinished thoughts – Some of our thoughts are expressed verbally.  Some of them are kept to ourselves.  But some of our thoughts stop somewhere in between – we get them halfway out, and we realize we either don’t want to say it or don’t know how.  So when it applies, have your characters start to share something (maybe something “dangerous” or personal or out of line) and stop – rephrase.  This works especially well in situations of conflict.
  • Run-ons and fragments – This sounds similar, but it’s different.  This isn’t a conscious stopping and going – it’s just normal human grammar mistakes.  Writers are so focused on their own grammar that they treat dialogue the same way, which isn’t realistic.  So have characters mesh two sentences into one, or express thoughts without a subject + verb structure.  It doesn’t make you a bad writer.  Don’t worry.
  • Forgetting words or phrases – This happens to a varying degree with all people.  Having a character stop mid-sentence and snap their fingers and ask:

“What is it?  When it’s like something that happened, like, because of fate?”
“Uh, coincidence?”
“No, more like it’s supposed to happen, but it’s still- serendipity.  That’s it.”

This can take up valuable page space, though, so only use it when it applies or when your conversation is lacking interactivity.

  • Shorter speech bursts with action in between – Not all of what a character has to say should be expressed in one long monologue.  In fact, it can often be better to write a sentence or two at a time than to write out a whole argument at once.  When a character pauses, fill the space with action or internal dialogue.  This is best for scenes in which two characters are walking somewhere or engaging in an activity.

Beyond these ideas, though, I have a few extra tips that involve two or more characters.  When 2+ people are engaging in a conversation, they are prone to:

  • Cut each other off – Holy heck, this happens a lot in real life, especially if your characters are both talkative or dominant.  Conversation sounds more realistic when your characters aren’t acting like they’re on a debate stage and they aren’t allowed to speak until a light comes on.  Even if it’s just cutting off the last word of each other’s sentence, or attempting to interrupt unsuccessfully, give it a shot and see how it amps up a conversation.
  • Stop listening – Or they never start listening at all.  When characters are distracted or in the middle of conflict, they may not hear what each other says – or they may misinterpret.  If you need to pace a conversation or increase miscommunication, this is a good way to do it.
  • Hang on to details – When Character A makes a long statement, Character B doesn’t always listen all the way through – but not always intentionally.  People can get caught on certain details in what’s said.  For example:

“All I’m saying is that- listen.  When two people are in a relationship, they don’t go around behind each other’s backs, okay?  Even if it has nothing to do with each other!  It’s full disclosure.  How would you like it if I did something like that?  If I just… looked at you and lied to you?  Wouldn’t it bother you?  Would you ever look at me and wonder, ‘What if she doesn’t mean that?  What if she’s hiding something else?’”

“Is that what this is?” he asked, eyes narrowed playfully.  He bit back a smile.  “A relationship?”

  • Get distracted – When two characters talk, they don’t talk in a vacuum – there are environmental factors that stall or accelerate conversation.  If two characters are rushing to get dressed for a party, they will speak quickly or rashly.  If they’re in line at Subway, they’re thinking about what they want on their sandwich.  If they’re driving, they may need to stop talking to figure out which exit they take off the highway.  Allow their environment to interact with their conversation, and your scene will feel more immersive.

That’s all the advice I have right now!  If you have any other questions, send them in and I’ll respond shortly :)  Good luck!


If you need advice on general writing or fanfiction, you should maybe ask me!

Ten Years (Part 12)

Summary: AU. When a major account is on the line at work, reader is forced to revisit some old connections at her ten year high school reunion for a chance at success. Will she let the past consume her, or will she see the future in her grasp?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 4,065 (I AM OUT OF MY MIND)

Warnings: language, fluff, excessive sweetness

A/N: Tags are closed. This is the second to last part. I came THISCLOSE to having another cliffhanger, but I couldn’t do it. I don’t want to drag it out just to torture you. PS - IT’S SO FLUFFY I’M GONNA DIE!

Part: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13

Originally posted by adamisstillinhellthankstoyou

Keep reading

BTS when you surprise them with the Korean you have learned

This reaction (as all reactions tbh^^) is a bit unrealistic because I don’t think you could ever date a Korean person in Korea without speaking Korean and vice versa (except if you both speak English well~) BUUUUTTT let’s just imagine this anyway because it’s cute~

All gifs belong to their rightful creators=owners (see urls right under the gifs as always :*). Please support each other and BTS well!

[The Korean in this might be horrible because I’m not very good at it yet so I can’t control well if other people have made mistakes^^ I made half of it a bit more formal and half of it informal speech so you have some variety in it^^]

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Jin: Comes home late after dance practice

You: “You look so tired~”

Jin: “Nah, it’s okay~ I’m just hungry” 

You: “[get your phone out to order takeout food] 맛있는 것을 사 줄게요~ [I will buy you something delicious to eat~]”

Jin: “Wow! You’ve become so good in Korean! [grabs the phone from your hands] Let me buy. I’ll buy you something good to reward you for studying~”.

Originally posted by jjilljj

Suga

You: “Yoongi, listen: 당신은 나에게 무척 소중해요~ [You mean so much to me~]”

Yoongi: [Sass master] I know~”

You: “Don’t joke around! Was that grammatically correct?”

Yoongi: “[Softly now] Yes, it was~”

You: “Then do I get a kiss now? You said I’d get one every time I made a good sentence about us in Korean~ [pouting playfully]” 

Yoongi: “[insert gif] You’re right, I made that promise~ [you get your kiss of course~~]”

Originally posted by jeonsshi

J-Hope

You: “Oppa, look~ [show him what you learned in your Korean class at university that day]”

Hoseok: “[reading attentively] You can say all of that already? [reads some of it aloud proudly]”

You: “아직 배우고 있어요~ [I’m still lacking~]”

Hoseok: “Don’t be like that! You’re doing great! [reads more of it and can’t believe how much progress you have made in just a few weeks~]

Originally posted by j-snakeu

Rap Monster

Namjoon: “[shows you a ryan plushie a fan has handed him at a fansign] Look, ______, a fan gave me this~ It’s cute, right? I think it’ll like to be with the other ones~”

You: “[Cupping his face in your hands] “오빠는 정말 귀여워서 꼬집어 주고 싶어요! [Oppa, you’re so cute I want to pinch you!]” 

Namjoon: “[insert gif: a smol happy bean] Awww, you’re too cute, baby~~”

Originally posted by myloveseokjin

Jimin: Okay kids, Al eonni is going to teach you the Korean equivalent of phrases like “Wanna come to my house for a coffee?” etc., which you usually say after a date in case you want indicate subtly that you are totally up for a make-out session at home^^ 

You: [Feeling like your date with Jimin might come to an end too soon] 라면 먹을래? [Wanna come in for ramyeon? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ]” 

Jimin: “[Almost chokes on the last sip of his coffee, insert gif^^] Did Namjoon teach you that? I mean I-”

You: “Do you want to come or not?”

Jimin: “Yes! Of course! If… if you don’t mind, I-”

You: [Grab his hand and just lead him home~]

Originally posted by jookyunhoe

V: The hyungs want to ask him something about the perfomance tomorrow but he signals them to ask him later because he’s on the phone with you

V: “[To the members] I can’t talk right now, nuna’s on the phone. [To you] What did you want to say?”

You: “얼만큼 보고싶어? [How much do you miss me?]”

V: “Waaa you always study when I’m on tour, don’t you?”

You: “[Whiny] Because I have nothing else to do without you :/”

V: “I miss you all the way from Japan to Korea~ All the way across the ocean, that’s how much I miss you~”

Originally posted by sweaterpawsjimin

Jungkook

You: “[Are hanging out with Jungkook and the other members when Jimin shows off his new shirt and you intuitively use a phrase that Jungkook has been using a lot lately~]  스타일 죽이네! [You have killer style!]”

Jungkook: [insert gif: precious baby boy smiles to himself and is proud that you copied one of his signature phrases~~]

Originally posted by aquaporis

anonymous asked:

I found this and thought it would be funny for mckirk: Person A *unbuttoning shirt* : god it’s so hot in here ; Person B : I know that but why are you unbuttoning my shirt ?

  • Over the years, Leonard feels comfortable enough around Jim to flirt with him freely. It’s something Jim initiated, but now something Leonard happily reciprocates. It’s just flirting, after all. It’s fun, it’s safe, and it’s just their thing. Nothing actually happens, no matter how ridiculously cheesy their flirting gets.
  • “Hey stranger,” Jim says, resting his hand on Leonard’s shoulder as he slips down on the bar stool next to Bones, “what’s a place like you doing in a guy like this?” “That’s not even creative,” Bones replies, and Jim laughs. He refills their drinks, smile easy on his face. Leonard listens to Jim talk about his day, a smile to match Jim’s, until the other stops talking and says; “what?” “Oh, I’m sorry,” Leonard says, “I’m trying to listen, but I’m getting lost in your eyes.” Jim opens his mouth to protest, though he’s pleasantly flustered for a few seconds. “You’re just as bad as I am,” he says eventually, and Leonard laughs, too.
  • “If I were a cat I’d spend all my 9 lives with you.” “Please don’t,” Bones says, “because I’m allergic.” They’re sitting in Bones’ quarters. Bones has been reading his PADD quietly, while Jim’s nestled against him doing the same thing, just far less productive. “I’m in the mood for a pizza… a pizza you.” “Shut the fuck up,” Bones laughs, “not only is that terrible, you’re just reminding me of the fact that we don’t have pizzas here.” “York Town next month,” Jim says, “I’ll take you out for real pizza.” “Deal,” Bones says, probably a bit too quickly, “what are you doing on your PADD, anyway?” “I’m reading up cheesy pickup lines.” Bones huffs at that, turning back to his own PADD. “My doctor says I’m lacking Vitamin U,” Jim continues. “I’m your doctor, and the only thing you’re lacking is Vitamin D.” “Oh, you have no idea,” Jim says, turning to Bones with a small smile, just to throw the other off guard a little.
  • “Are you thirsty?” “Thirsty for you.”
  • “I need directions-” “Ask Sulu or Chekov.” “- Bones, can you not? I need directions to your heart.” “Lame.”
  • “There’s only one thing I would change about you, and that’s your last name.” “Really? Because I’d change lots of things about you,” Bones replies to that, “for one, you’re annoyingly stubborn.” “Bones.” “You think before you act, to the point it’s incredibly frustrating.” “Bones, please.” “You have no consideration for the Prime Directive whatsoever-” “Bones, you’re ruining the mood.“ "You purposely avoid my medical appointments. All the god damn time.” “I get it, I get it-” “You’re also so god damn beautiful you give the sun a run for its money.” Jim opens his mouth, though processes Bones’ words, and just gives him a smug smile instead. “Smooth, Bones. I’ll give you that one.”
  • He’s been working together with Uhura almost all day, and Leonard is exhausted. Uhura’s trying to translate the speech of the weird alien they picked up while Bones monitors its vitals carefully. “So how are you and Jim, huh?” Uhura asks. “Good?” Bones replies to that, “I mean, I can’t complain.” “No, I bet. Jim’s passionate in everything he does,” Uhura agrees, and Bones smiles lightly at that. “Annoyingly so.” “I’m glad, though,” Uhura says, “I haven’t seen you this happy in, well, ever.” “Thanks?” Bones says, though he’s not quite sure what that’s supposed to mean. They work together for another while, quietly so, though then Bones needs to get something off his chest after all. “Sometimes I feel like we’re an actual couple, you know?” He says, carefully so, and Uhura narrows her eyes. “Wait. What do you mean, you’re not together?”
  • They’ve spent the last couple hours in Bones’ quarters, with their usual light banter, strong drinks, and a little flirting. Though something feels different this time. Jim touches him more than usual, or Bones is just more aware of it now. He feels that hand on his shoulder even after it has left. He feels those eyes on him even when Bones is focused on his PADD. He just feels super aware of Jim’s words and his presence, and he’s not sure how to deal with this anymore. “Hey,” Jim says, and he’s suddenly really fucking close, “is it just me, or is it super hot in here?” “No, you’re right,” Bones says, watching Jim’s arm move downwards as he pulls the zipper at the back of his uniform, “but why are you pulling down the zipper of my uniform?” “Because,” Jim says, “it can always be a little hotter.” He laughs at his own joke, and Bones smiles fondly, though then finds himself leaning in closer. Actually kissing Jim is the weirdest sensation, especially because Jim kisses him back so eagerly, his hand still on Bones’ back, though sliding down to pull his shirt over Bones’ head and remove it entirely.
  • Leonard finds himself both at peace and somehow twice as conflicted afterwards. He doesn’t want to move, because Jim’s body is warm and comfortable against his own, and he doesn’t want morning to come. At the same time, though, he can’t rest easy knowing their whole friendship can’t be the same again, and that alone is enough to keep him awake. "What’s the matter?” Jim asks so suddenly, it nearly startles Bones. “Nothing.” “Don’t bullshit me, you’ve got your stiff pondering shoulders,” Jim replies to that. “Okay,” Bones says, turning to face Jim properly, “I can’t do casual.” “What?” “Casual sex.” “Okay?” Jim replies, frowning a little, “what makes you think I can?” “I know you can,” Bones says, “I’ve picked you up from numerous locations across campus during the Academy.” “Touche,” Jim says, “I mean, with you. I don’t think I could do casual with you. Plus, Uhura told me about your conversation with her and I figured if I ever needed any confirmation about how desperately in love with me you are, that was it.” Bones laughs at that, a hand running down over Jim’s naked back. “I’m liking you a little less already,” Bones replies, and Jim smiles. “No, you don’t.” 
  • It’s probably minutes later when both of them are nearly asleep (Jim’s definitely asleep), when Bones’ fingers gently trace down Jim’s spine. “No, I don’t.” 
The Sunrise (Sirius Black x Hufflepuff!Reader)

Originally posted by nellaey

Part 2
Part 3

Request by Anonymous: Hey, so I know you mainly focus on Newt Scamander imagines but I was wondering if you would consider doing a Sirius Black x hufflepuff reader imagine? Like where he stereotypes hufflepuffs as lazy and boring and stuff? K LOVE YOU THANKS

Word Count: 2, 004

Warnings: None

A/N: Don’t judge, I’ve never written Sirius before.
This is a shorter imagine.
I FINALLY UPDATED THANK GOD.

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

Sirius had to admit, Hogwarts was creepy when it was silent. He glanced at his watch; 5:57am. Four minutes since he had decided to sneak out from the Gryffindor dorms. He had lain in his bed since 5am, unable to fall asleep again. He didn’t know why he had woken up, perhaps by the joint force of James’ and Peter’s snores. He was so bored, he had to go do something and he knew he’d feel bad if he woke up any of his friends, so he decided to go break some rules and sneak out, still in his pyjamas. The sun hadn’t risen yet and the school was shrouded in darkness, the only light coming from the tip of his wand. He made sure to be quiet as he walked down the many hallways, and to keep the wand away from the paintings that lined the walls, so as to not wake them up.

He was walking down a hallway to go prank a particularly nasty teacher in his classroom, when he heard a cheeky giggle he knew all too well. He mumbled a curse under his breath and turned into the courtyard, dashing behind a tree. That damn poltergeist. Apparently he didn’t take any break from causing trouble, even in the small hours of the morning. Sirius knew that if Peeves saw or heard him he’d run to tell the Bloody Baron and Sirius would be in a world of trouble for sneaking out, so he held his breath and kept perfectly still. As much as he liked to make people believe that detentions didn’t bother him, he’d prefer not to get one. He stayed in his spot until the silence reassured him that the poltergeist had gone and he breathed a sigh of relief, his breath fogging up in the chilly morning air.

“Peeves rarely comes down to this part of the castle.” A voice said, making him jump. He looked around for the source of the voice and his eyes landed on you, already in your Hufflepuff robes, sitting under a tree with a book in one hand and your lit wand in your other, your eyes still on the book. “Something or someone must have lured him here.” You said, looking at him now and raising an accusatory eyebrow. He was confused as to why you were sitting on the cold ground when there was a perfectly good bench a few feet away from you, but he shook it off and gave you one of his signature smirks.

“Couldn’t have been me. Though Hufflepuffs aren’t exactly known to be stealthy, must have been you he followed.” He said, enjoying how he made you grit your teeth in annoyance. He already knew he’d enjoy bugging you.

“It couldn’t have been me because I’ve been here since 5 and I come here often and he’s never found me.” You said, trying to keep your calm. You were usually a nice, calm person but the second someone insults your house, your temper shortens by a half. Sirius was surprised anyone woke up that early to sneak out and consequently break many rules, especially a Hufflepuff.

“What’s a Hufflepuff doing out of the den before noon?” He asked, now leaning on the tree, arms crossed. You pursed your lips angrily.

“Wow, in the space of 10 seconds you’ve managed to insult both me and my house twice.” You said.

“It’s truly a gift.” He said, grinning at your annoyed expression.

“Truly.” You grumbled sarcastically, turning back to your book. He took this time to properly look at you. You didn’t seem too bothered by the cold air (and the cold ground you were sitting on) nor did you look tired, even though you had woken up pretty early. The light from your wand was making your H/C hair shine and E/C eyes sparkle, though that may have just been your irritation. Sirius had to admit, you were pretty and he wondered why he’d never seen you before. He had quite an eye for pretty girls, and that you hadn’t caught his or vice versa bewildered him. You looked around his age, which stumped him even more. “Stop staring at me.” You said, not looking at him. His heavy gaze making you feel uncomfortable.

“How old are you?” He asked out of nowhere. Your gaze turned to him at his random question. You decided not to comment on it.

“Sixteen.” You answered, deciding to just answer his questions without much conversation. You really didn’t feel like talking to him, for multiple reasons. The great Sirius Black was known for his trouble and he really didn’t seem like a nice person. So, he thought, you were the same age as him, same year, so how has he never noticed you?

“What’s your name?” He asked. You sighed at his continuation of this strange conversation you were having.

“Y/F/N.” You said.

“Y/F/N…?”

“Y/F/N Y/L/N.” He stayed quiet for a moment, making you gaze at him suspiciously. “Ok, what?” You finally asked.

“I don’t remember you.” He said, looking genuinely distressed. He prided himself in his knowledge of everyone, something he frequently used to his advantage when he wanted something. You snorted, typical Sirius Black, sitting on his little throne, completely oblivious to others. You didn’t really know what you expected though, from a person who finds amusement in teasing others and flirting with girls without it actually leading anywhere.

“I’m not surprised.” You said, giving him a disapproving look. The corners of his lips quirked upwards, completely unaffected by your words.

“And why is that?” He asked, walking over to you and plopping down on the ground across from you, a little too close for comfort. You narrowed your eyes at him and placed your book down.

“Well why should I not be? I really can’t imagine you paying any attention to someone who wasn’t fawning over you or who wasn’t your current victim.”

“A little teasing doesn’t do anyone any harm, Huffles.” You clenched your jaw at the nickname.

“Tell that to the first years crying in their beds because all the older kids just find it so funny that their textbooks keep running away.”

“You’re such a Hufflepuff.” He said, rolling his eyes.

“And you’re just an arrogant Gryffindor. Always the centre of attention, hm?”

“It’s not my fault I’m popular.” You gave a frustrated sigh.

“It’s pointless arguing with you.” You replied. He grinned widely at you. Despite your obvious attempts to drive him away, Sirius was thoroughly enjoying his time with you. You were especially feisty for a Hufflepuff and different from anyone he’s spoken to before. Most girls were flirty and giggly around him and the few that weren’t interested in him, he’d never felt drawn to. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?” He asking, smirking.

“Stop doing that with your face.”

“What? Smiling? I thought Hufflepuffs were all about the smiles.”

“Not when they’re creepy.”

“You offend me, Huffles.” He said, pouting. “I’ve been told I have quite a nice smile.”

“The people who told you that didn’t know how to let you down easily.” You quipped, flashing him a smirk of your own.

“You’re mean for a Hufflepuff.” He remarked, making you groan.

“Stop with the Hufflepuff shaming.” You exclaimed. “Hufflepuff is a great house.”

“Yeah, I’m sure it is. Wasn’t it Helga Hufflepuff who literally said ‘and I’ll take the rest’ when the founders where creating the houses?” He asked, raising his eyebrows at you. You glowered at him. You were actually starting to have an okay time until he said that.

“Helga Hufflepuff wanted a house where everyone fit in without having to prove that they’re the smartest or the bravest or the most cunning.” You said angrily. “Hufflepuffs are supposed to be kind and brave and loyal, nowhere does it say that they’re boring or lazy or push overs. We are smart and brave and kind and the only area we’re lacking in is producing dark wizards. And the second someone insults us, we protect fiercely.”

“Well, the last part is definitely true in your case.” He said. You gave him a small smile, embarrassed by your outburst. “Nice speech by the way.”

“Thanks, I’m actually considering being a motivational speaker.” You said sarcastically, pretending to be thoughtful. He smirked smugly at you, noticing that you were becoming more comfortable with him.

“You know, you haven’t actually told me what you’re doing out here so early.” He asked. The playful look on your face was suddenly replaced by a bashful one.

“I like to watch the sunrise.” You said quietly. The smirk fell from his face at your genuine response. He lowered his head, his hair falling to hide his face. You bit your lip nervously. “I know it’s stupid, I just-“

“No, no-” Sirius cut you off, reaching for your hand. Your mouth shut, surprised by the sudden sincere emotion. “I mean, it’s not stupid. I-“ He hesitated and paused for a minute. You gave his hand a light squeeze. His gaze flickered away and his hand slipped out of yours, making you miss it’s warmth. You scolded yourself. No, you don’t want Sirius to hold your hand. You don’t, you don’t, you don’t. Sirius cleared his throat, his signature smirk coming back. You frowned, you knew what that smirk meant and you didn’t want it. You liked the genuine Sirius, the one that you didn’t think many people saw. “So do you come here often?”

“Just on Wednesdays. I find that sunrises are prettiest on Wednesdays.” You said. He looked at you amusedly, raising a questioning eyebrow. You just shrugged in response. Suddenly you saw the first rays of light appear over the walls of the courtyard. You shushed Sirius, despite him not actually saying anything, making him chuckle, and pointed behind him. He turned around, scooting next to you and leaned his back on the tree,

You both watched the sun rise, watched the vibrant colours of orange and pink softly spread across the sky. You both saw how the light chased the darkness of the night away and welcome the new day with brilliant hues of red. You couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face. Watching the sunrise always filled you with a certain hope. You turned slightly to look at Sirius, his eyes on the sky. You were surprised to find a look of awe on his face, mouth slightly ajar. He looked open and vulnerable, you had to bite your lip to stop your smile from growing even more at the sight of this Sirius. Expression not hidden by a smirk or a witty remark.

He turned to look at you, catching you looking at him. You didn’t mind though when you saw him reciprocate your large grin. No smug look, no teasing words, just wonderment. You admired how the sun made his dark eyes and hair shine, a stark contrast to his usual ‘dark, bad boy’ look. What you didn’t know was that he was marvelling at you too, how your beautiful smile lit up your kind and passionate face and how your hair swayed slightly in the cool morning breeze. He snapped out of his trance and looked away, deciding to rest his gaze on the sunrise, the other beautiful sight before him.

“You know, Huffles,” he said, “you’re not so bad for a Hufflepuff.” You laughed and nudged his shoulder slightly. This time, he was grinning in triumph for making you laugh. He also didn’t try to push down the way his heart squeezed at the gentle sound.

“Prick.” You retorted, making him laugh at your weak insult. You sat in silence for a while longer. “You’re not so bad for a Gryffindor yourself.” You said, keeping your gaze on the sky despite you feeling his eyes on you.

“I’ll accept that.” Sirius said, giving a deep sigh.

“Nice PJ’s by the way.” You said, glancing at his dark blue pyjamas and making him burst into laughter.

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

Aaaah, I don’t know. How was that? Was it good? I’ve never tried writing Sirius before. Did I do ok? I don’t know, please tell me. Part 2 maybe? If you want? I hope you enjoyed it and thanks for reading.

Constructive criticism is welcome.

K LOVE YOU BYE

Something Different

Request: Taehyung fluff where you guys are both in college and Taehyung sits behind you in class but never says anything, but one day he sees u dozing off in class and he decides to buy coffee after class

A/n: So I was planning a one shot, but you guys asked for a mini-series instead, and I’m such a hoe for Taehyung anyways. most of the request is in this chapter, but I have plans you guys… stick around -Kaitlin

Genre: Fluff
Members: Taehyung x Reader
Word Count: 1219

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You’re normal, and you like living your normal, quiet life. But when you meet someone new and exciting, your tastes begin to change…

Originally posted by jxnhyungs

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The Sweetest- *Quarterback!Theo*

Okay. @stydiajeep or something like that requested this a LOOONG time ago. (apologises if I tagged you for nothing) I haven’t forgotten and this pic inspired me. And an anon requested something about a glutton boyfriend. Let’s hope this tied together as well as I hoped. Here it goes, I love you so much. Thanks for the request.

Also- thanks to @wiccanthrope for helping to provide the proper circumstances for me to remember I had this request floating around.

Warnings: It’s long af. Food porn. Real porn. I may have inherited @lilshitwayne‘s clean fetish so we’ll see. Phew- let’s get into it.


You stood on the sidelines waving your pom poms and cheering loudly as your boyfriend, Theo had scored a touchdown, winning Beacon Hills the championship. He looked over and shot you a wink as his teammates all flocked him, it’d be impossible to get to him now. Not while they were hoisting him onto their shoulders as he held the trophy. Thank God that they’d won, you thought.

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7 Minutes- Part 2 (Shawn Mendes Imagine)

requested: yes & no

pairing: reader x Shawn Mendes

word count: 1,962

a/n: fuck, look at me being proactive !! I’m actually really excited about this, thank you guys for all of the support :) x 

Your name: submit What is this?

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On AntiFascism in the US.

I don’t think antifascists in the US are really aware of what the situation in the US currently is and hearing the news from Berkley cemented this.

For people who aren’t aware, various Nazi groups organised a Nazi rally and were predictably met with anti fascist resistance. There was a police presence, people were armed with sticks, poles, knives, shields and improvised armour. Several people were punched and soon after about 20 people were arrested and then AntiFa dispersed and ceded ground to Nazis, who remained for a bit longer and then also left.

And depending on how you saw it, it was either victory for AntiFa or a victory for Nazis.  Wheter or not it was or how you saw it, one thing was clear. It displayed the weaknesses of the anti fascist movement in the US. Mainly a severe lack of organisation and a shallow goals mostly ammounting to ‘meet them out on the field and beat the shit out of them’.

In any other, less fascist time, this may work better than it would now. But i feel that with the current state of affairs in the US, what we’re risking is merely a repeat of 1920’s-30’s Germany.

During the violent and turbulent political and social climate of Germany at that time, the police was often essentially hand in hand on the field with Nazis and SA Stormtroopers. What we saw at Berkley according to reports by some was much the same.

A Weimar police officer with an SA stormtrooper.

Nazis at Berkley knew how to play up to the police and moreover the police in the US is more than likely to sympathise with them, given that the police in the US is absolutely packed with white supremacists, Nazis and other assorted fascists.

The police in the US are practically chomping at the bits to simply start shooting us in the streets. They’re already killing people of colour by the hundreds each year, and that’s while also pretending they did nothing wrong. What do you think will happen when all this pretense completely drops away and they’re allowed to kill protestors en masse?

I don’t know if open anti fascism in the US will work or flourish when we have the literal organs of the government against us out on the streets.

Nazis know this, they’re on the same wave lenght, and this is something US anti fascists need to start realising.

You’re not just dealing with a scattered bunch of Nazis out on the streets, clad in MAGA hats and Pepe pins.

You’re also  dealing with their police enablers who will use any justification to whip out the shields, batons and move in to disperse and beat the living shit out anyone they see, while the Nazis are safely tucked back, laughing at us as we’re bleeding out on the ground and tackled by a squad of armoured riot officers.

You’re dealing with the politicians they voted in who are right now trying to pass laws that will sabotage freedom of protest in the US by giving police more, and of course the victims of these laws will be antifascists.

Be sure, things are not okay and things aren’t easy, especially since the anti-fascist movement in the US has been utterly declawed due to decades of political disenfranchisement and a media narrative that is decidedly against us.

Nazis and right wingers in the US have literal decades of community ties, they have the benefit of old and experienced organisers and furthemore they have the benefit of, on average, being financially stable. Nazis at Berkley were able to bus in dozens of Nazis from surrounding areas while the anti fascists at Berkley were unprepared and local.

We failed on an informational level, we were not able to find out about their plans, their forces or capabilities and then adjust our actions accordingly.

Furthemore Nazis and right wing organisations in the US, as i said, have the benefit of support from police departments, politicians and when push comes to shove, the military. Be sure about that, if it comes to that the military will open fire on anti fascists in the US.

For all intents and purposes the AntiFa movement in the US has only now really had the chance to cut it’s teeth and it shows. Many AntiFa are absolutely ready to throw down, but throwing down is only one aspect and we, again, do not have as much experience in that regard.

There’s a legitimate threat that anti-fascism in the US becomes mostly performative and when faced with an actual fight on the streets,  it will fall apart.

Our support base is tiny and insular.  The mainstream left leaning figures want nothing to do with us and the majority of US society doesn’t pay attention, care, or see us as threats to free speech because that’s how media frames the conflict between these two groups.

And this is something Nazis excel at, the control of information and how these issues are framed. When an AntiFascist punched Richard Spencer in the face it’s not seen as resistance towards someone who is openly genocidal, they see an intolerant bully shutting down someone who by the virtue of free speech, has the right to say whatever the fuck they want.

Nazis know this, it is central to their frame of 'we’re the victims, we merely wish to engage in a democratic process that is behoven to us from birth as rightful citizens of the United States’.

That’s another AntiFascists don’t have:  reach.

Our terms and core beliefs are alien and unpalatable to the majority of Americans. Nazis abuse the already existing and inherent bigotries of the majority of Americans. They prey upon these insecurities and inculcated, centuries old cultural beliefs and work off of them to drum up support.

It is much harder for us to tear this shit down than it is for them to just work off of something that is already there.

Look at YouTube as a microcosm. Decidedly reactionary and fascist YouTubers have gigantic reach when compared to even the most popular leftists. They have weaponised memes to a frightening degree and will continue to do so. As fucking ridiculous as it is to say this out loud, memes have become a frontier OF propaganda in the US.

The leftists that we do have are under constant assault and many of them, especially trans people and people of colour, do not have a secure enough fallback to survive.

Nazis on YouTube are paid in literal thousands to rant out debunked propaganda for three hours.  They will survive anything barring being completely and utterly cut off from the Internet. Their audiences are greater by far, an audience i have not seen any anti-fascist being able to emulate.

And on top of that their information is much more palatable and regurgitated far easier. We do not have that benefit, as i said, to dismantle pre-existing and heavily ingrained bigotries that fascists so easily exploit.

So we’re losing the rhetorical battle as well, something that i think is massivley important, moreso than even just engaging them out on the streets. And of course mainstream media, in it’s twisted visage of 'objectivity’ is only proving itself to be a tool to enable fascists. So we can’t rely on that either.

We need to somehow make our info more acessible, more palatable, we need to make our reach greater.

I think that aside from strenghtening our information game we would do well to focus on uplifting and strenghtening our own communities so that we have a reliable fallback. We need to help each other more than anything so that we can live to even fight.

And fighting isn’t just phisically fighting. Not everyone is capable of doing that.

We need to also make sure that we uplift the voices that are the most marginalised in the United States especially, the voices of LGBTQ antifascists of colour. We should not allow for the discourse to be dominated by more white cishet voices to the point where LGBTQ folk of colour are shoved off to the background.

This shit isn’t easy and we’re currently not in an enviable position. Make no mistake these are extremely dire times. And honestly at this point i’m simply rambling and i just want to hear other AntiFa’s opinions on this.

@justsomeantifas @class-struggle-anarchism

Infatuated

Summary: When a friend turns up after a breakup for comfort, will Steve finally take the opportunity to admit his feelings? 

Warnings: Unprotected sex. 

Masterlist

If there was one thing Steve Rogers could accomplish where women were involved, it was being chivalrous to the ever painful T; where you were involved, though, it was an entirely selfish endeavor. If he held a door, it was only to watch your ass as you walked past. If he offered to help you out of one of Tony’s particularly low sitting cars, it was purely to feel the silk of your skin and the velvet of your “thank you” wash over him for however brief the moment. And worst? When he helped you into your coat tonight. God, he took two showers and he still could not shake the scent from your hair as it brushed his nose.

Now he was sprawled out on the couch in the living room area of the Avengers compound with the TV on as a haphazard distraction. A light from Wanda’s room lit up the hallway on the second story and easy melodies from her guitar slowly, slowly unwound the tangled strings of his heart. If he listened hard enough, he was sure to pick out Sam’s snores and Tony and Rhodes bickering from the workshop below his feet.

His phone buzzed on the coffee table and he jumped at the distraction. An audible groan fled his lips when he saw your name lighting it up.

‘You up?’ It said.

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