i didnt even plan on these pics being the same exact angle!

anonymous asked:

can you please explain what is happening i'm confused

oh boy, anon are you sure you want to go down this path?

ok so i’ll try and be as concise as i can and sorry but it’s been a really long day and an even longer year so forgive me for any errors

i’m assuming you’re referring to what’s recently been occurring with louis from one direction and ‘his’ ‘baby’? if you’d like a proper explanation of what happened in the four years leading up to this particular incident, let me know and i’d be more than happy to explain.

basically, louis from one direction has had a baby. this is what the media and louis himself (or, rather, his social media accounts) are telling us. he tweeted a confirmation at like 12 noon saturday  UK time, and posted an instagram photo of himself and a baby at like 3am UK time today. this is really jarring for a lot of people because up until this point, both  louis himself and his social media accounts have remained largely silent about the whole topic. this is a part of why the whole thing seems fishy but i’m doing to break it down even further later so lets move on. up until now, the whole baby thing has been ridiculously handled/executed, and there’s been a definite lack of concrete proof that a) there was a pregnancy, b) there is a baby, c) the baby is louis’s, and d) he’s happy about it. i’ve tried to be as objective as possible with this whole thing and thus i’m discounting a lot of stuff other people are crediting as ‘proof’. thus, my reasons for why this is so weird are as follows:

briana  (the mother of the baby) has no social media footprint before this time. her twitter, facebook instagram etc were wiped back in like january i think. she was not pictured with louis until may 16 i think. this looks like she was earmarked early on as being important (in comparison, louis was photographed at a lot of clubs with a lot of girls after his breakup with eleanor, and they’ve all remained largely nameless/did not have their social media wiped). this is quite fishy. especially as a twitter handle ‘BrianaFacts’ or something was created on may 14, before briana even met louis/was papped/shared the night that is being credited as the night of conception or whatever. so yeah a bit weird.

louis has looked distinctly displeased with the whole ordeal. he has not mentioned it unless it has been brought up. he has looked not-happy whenever it has been mentioned, or when forced to comment on it. as you are probably aware, dear anon (i hope i haven’t lost you!), one direction are at the start of a much publicised and angsted-over break. during their most recent promo round for their album ‘made in the a.m.’ (buy it on itunes!) they got asked what their plans were for the break. louis did not mention the baby ONCE. he instead mentioned that he was looking forward to no plans/not having to set an alarm/lads holiday/no plans/eating pizza/no responsibility. all this is kinda weird when you consider just how clucky louis is. there are gifs/vids/pics of louis looking overjoyed when anyone mentions children/babies/his future babies or he comes into contact with young kids. there’s some quote about how he used to go into the hospital his mum worked at and help look after the babies because he was that clucky. weird and out of character then that he looks so miserable whenever anyone mentioned his baby, and even weirder that he didnt even MENTION it when asked about his future plans. plus his mum is a midwife and she has remained completely silent on the whole topic up until this point. 

louis’s biological dad left his mum when louis was less than a week old. louis has stated that he resents his dad and hated how much his mum struggled after she was abandoned. louis is undeniably a family man and is the self-proclaimed mama’s boy of the band. there is zero chance that louis would do the same, and treat the mother of his child the same way his mother was treated. zero chance. yet he’s been papped at various clubs with various girls, and again all over atlanta and france with danielle campbell. louis would never abandon the mother of his child the way he ‘abandoned’ briana during her pregnancy. i’m not saying he has to be celibate or committed to her or whatever but he has demonstrated his strength of character enough times to indicate that he would not leaver her high and dry. louis is not like his dad.

the birth was announced first via update accounts. like come on. these stalkerish update accounts tweeted about the baby being born before briana’s grandmother left a weird comment on an instagram of trashbags confirming the birth. i genuinely do not understand how these update accounts knew about it before anyone else, unless they were being fed the information. just like they are often fed information about the boys’ whereabouts from members of one direction’s team so that the boys don’t stay out of twitter mentions/trends/photos etc for too long. 

everyone remained silent about the birth for a long long time. louis’ mother didn’t mention it until today. louis’ sister lottie is one of the hair/make-up artists for one direction and has toured with them extensively and is thus presumably very close to her brother, yet she has remained silent on the matter and has instead been instagramming pictures from her holiday in the canary islands. so not only is she there, but she has remained silent up until the day louis tweeted. which was like three days after the baby was supposed to have been born. 

none of the pictures of briana while she was pregnant clearly show both her face and the bump. there have been a couple of instances of photos being posted of her by her cousin ashley/briana-affiliated update twitter accounts that have been proven to be of someone named ashley fillerup who was pregnant a while back (i think she also may be briana’s cousin? but i’m trying to deal with the irrefutable here so i won’t dwell). i feel really squirmy about scrutinising and discussing a woman’s body like this regardless of who she is, but there is a photo of her from halloween (approx 6 months along, after she has been papped with a bump numerous times before) and there is no bump. as an isolated incident, it could be a trick of the light/angle etc but pap photos taken over the course of her pregnancy show that her bump has drastically varied in size with no relationship to chronology so it looks very dodgy altogether.

there has been a recent push of promo for one direction’s new single ‘history’ (which is a banger btw, listen to it if you haven’t already!). it’s coincided EXACTLY with the birth. like i am not joking about how these two events have coincided. the last time any one from one direction even mentioned their new single was while i was still in the UK. no one has mentioned it since and i’ve been home for over a month. bizarre that they choose to release the video/push for promo now. looks quite fishy.

there’s also all this stuff about how often they’ve been papped taking the baby carrier (presumably holding the baby) around town since its birth. like they’ve been papped a lot. briana also is looking very very svelte for someone who just pushed a human being out of her. of course everyone is different with their pregnancies, carries and gains weight differnetly etc but she looks like she has no obvious residual stomach which typically hangs around after birth for a few weeks. but again i’m really squirmy about scrutinising a woman’s body so i’d rather focus on the way the baby carrier is held with little care for the contents and often in one hand whilst also clutching a phone in that hand. i don’t know the exact birthweight, but babies are generally heavy and shouldn’t be held in a way that conveys little concern for the contents.

i’ve tried to be discerning, and for me those are the reasons why it seems impossible that louis had a baby with briana. i’ve left a lot of the more subjective stuff out (oli, new team/old team, closeting, promo, larry etc) out of it because that derails the argument for me.  this, for me, is the stuff that makes this recent stuff so incongruous.

so yeah literally none of this makes sense, or correlates with louis clutching a precious child and posting a photo of it to instagram and being overjoyed all of a sudden. the photo is so shocking because  it makes me feel like i’m missing something, and i feel really stupid and dumb because i honestly can’t think of any other explanation for all of this, and i don’t understand why we’re suddenly seeing a baby when the rest of this has been so nebulous. anyway, if i’m wrong, i’m wrong and the world will still turn. one direction just have a hell of a lot of explaining to do if so.