i did wan i see this

I am so sick of seeing posts that say ratty is not abusive. and that his relationship with alien is not toxic. fuck off, go talk to someone who has been through at least emotional abuse. 

it feels like I’m back in the time when people were saying clexa should be called clexabuse. and i am personally offended and sick of people not calling themselves and sjm out for it.

- abuse isn’t just physical (which is what r*wan did in hof). 

- abuse cannot be excused by ‘self defence’ WHEN THEY ARE FUCKING IMMORTAL AND CAN PROBABLY JUST RUN THE FUCK AWAY

- don’t come to me saying that the oxford definition is __ because, quite frankly, you’re disgusting if that is you trying to give a poor excuse on why it isn’t abuse. 

- people are going through personal pain by having to see a shitty ship romanticised. how ugly is that impression on them?! have you thought maybe now they think they should have forgiven their abuser?! 

enjoy your ugly idea of sexy partners xox I’m unfollowing a lot of tog blogs because i can’t mentally keep seeing these pop up on my dashboard anymore without feeling my adrenaline rush and just feeling instantly angry. 

ngl I am low-key worried about Rogue One, but only because my boy Darth Vader is in it, and idk what incarnation of Vader they are going to use.

Filoni!Vader: yEAHHHHHHH!!! i am PUMPED to be on the DARK SIDE man I LOVE KILLING REBELS! *flies a tie-fighter with the Force so his cape can billow while he stands menacingly under a spotlight* I’m angry all of the time and I’m like OBSESSED with killing Obi-Wan! *chugs a Red Bull through his vents* WHO WANTS TO GO NEXT?

Lucas!Vader: high-key wanna die if any of you rebels could do that for me i’d appreciate it. *slaughters thousands of rebels effortlessly* come on man did you even try. damn this self-preservation instinct of mine. *sees obi-wan* HELL YEAH I’M GONNA DIE I CAN’T WAIT! *kills obi-wan in one swing* what.

Comics!Vader: *doesn’t say anything, but if he does it’s going to be one badass line like “ALL I’M SURROUNDED BY IS FEAR AND DEAD MEN”* *has a lot of flashbacks to the time when he had hair* *is sad a lot* *surrounded by quirky fun characters because this is anakin skywalker we are talking about*

While I was making cherry almond clusters, I was thinking about that post about Leia being Bail and Mothma’s big plan to deal with the Death Star, and now I’m sad that we never got to see Obi-Wan deal with Leia.

Can you imagine? He sees the message from Artoo and he’s like, “wow, she looks like Padme, wow, Bail and Breha did a great job, but she’s in trouble so let’s go.” And then he’s stuck on the Falcon with Han and Luke and he’s like, it will be so nice to talk to a calm, reasonable person again, because Han is amusing but annoying and Luke is–Luke is too many memories of his father and a sweetness that Obi-Wan doesn’t want to see stripped from him, and it’s not the boy’s fault Obi-Wan has all this baggage, but Leia will be refreshingly baggage-free.

And then he meets her.

i desperately want a clone wars documentary where you just see a bunch of jedi interviews and shots of the life on the front lines. framed with like this promise for hard-hitting coverage, and inspiring acts of bravery by the jedi heroes and then…


“So Padawan Tano, what did you think about the Hero with No Fear’s plan to recapture the planet?”

“It was the dumbest thing I had heard in my li-” Anakin runs in screaming. Ahsoka can’t even keep a straight face for five seconds. “Screw it, it was actually the second dumbest thing I heard in the last hour. Just yesterday his plan involved nearly blowing up the planet and asking Jar-Jar Binks to flirt with someone.” 

Anakin’s robe is on fire. All the troops of the 501st are panicking.


“Anakin is just so reckless.”

Cue shot of Obi-Wan leaping out of a building, sassing Maul about his new legs, wearing no armor, literally being the most reckless motherfucker in the galaxy

“I just don’t understand where he gets it from.”


“That plan against the Separatist forces was so daring, Knight Skywalker. Would you say that’s the secret to your success?”

“Well yeah of course, but a lot of it’s subtlety too. Quietly reading your opponent. Masking your moves and motives to confuse-

Holo-phone (i don’t know what kind of phones they have, don’t judge me) rings. “Oh hi, Padme babe. Sorry, I’m being interviewed right now. Love you snookums, no love you more, no love you more, okay but seriously, I’ll talk to you later, angel.”

Awkward look at the reporter and slowly dawning horror on his face. “Senator Amidala and I have a very close platonic relationship. Now, back to that question about my successful use of misdirection and subtlety?”

2

The answer to my question to how to destroy the Sith is Obi-Wan Kenobi.

These New Jedi Don’t Know Anything

Force Ghost Anakin: [sprawled out across Obi-Wan’s lap, half asleep, watching a blaringly-loud soap opera] Oh man, those two are so hooking up this week.
Force Ghost Obi-Wan: [sitting on Luke’s sofa, petting Anakin’s hair, wearing reading glasses and not looking up from reading a book called Betrayal: True Stories of Fallen Apprentices] Uh huh. 
Force Ghost Yoda: [floating on a nearby throw pillow, knitting] Liked the second season better, I did. 
Anakin: Yeah, it’s kind of jumped the shark, but I still have to see what happens with my OTP. 
Luke: [meditating, cracking one eye open] Guys, can you keep it down? I’m trying to commune with the Force. 
Anakin: We are the Force. 
Luke: No, dad, I mean the – [stops, looks around] 
[everyone snaps to attention] 
Obi-Wan: [removing his glasses] What was that?
Luke: [closing his eyes again] I…I think someone’s coming. A girl! 
Yoda: A new Jedi, you think?
Luke: Yeah…whoever it is, they definitely have the Force with them. 
Anakin: Well…go out there! Introduce yourself!
Luke: Should I…should I do something?
Obi-Wan: Are there any cliffs with good lighting you could stand on?
Anakin: [peering out the window] What’s the wind situation like out there?
Yoda: A robe, he needs, for drama. 
Obi-Wan: [putting one on Luke] Yes, it would never do to go out there without one…
Anakin: So what’s your plan, son?
Luke: Uh…say “hello, my name is Luke”?
[Anakin, Obi-Wan and Yoda look at each other uneasily] 
Obi-Wan: [dismayed] …”hello, my name is Luke”?
Luke: Well, I should greet her, right? I mean, what are you guys suggesting? I just put a hooded cape on and stand outside silently in the wind like a weirdo? And then, what? Dramatically un-hood myself while my hair blows around while remaining totally wordless? Heh…that…that would be…
[The Force Ghosts side-eye him]
Luke: O-OK, you guys know best. [puts his hood on] Well, wish me luck. [he goes outside to meet Rey] 
Obi-Wan: [annoyed] You see what happens when I’m not allowed to train someone until they’re an adult? Those are basic Jedi presentation skills! 
Yoda: A shame, it is. 
Anakin: [nodding solemnly] Really. I love the kid, but that is disappointing. 

U WAN KNO WHAT I WANNA SEE IN THE NEXT MOVIE??? I WANNA SEE KYLO REN LIKE FUCKIN USING THE FORCE AGAINST LEIA AND SHE IS JUST LIKE NO U FUCKIN DONT U LIL SHIT AND SHE USES THE FORCE TO SMACK HIM ACROSS THE ROOM AND SHES LIKE ‘WHERE TF DID U THINK U INHERITED THE FORCE FROM??’

Newt Scamander x Reader III

Originally posted by sweetly87

“Imagine being the only person who can tame the Niffler.“

You held the mole-like creature in your left hand while you scratched its tummy with your other hand.
„Aww, Newt what kind of creature is this ? It‘s so adorable !“
Newt turned around and couldn‘t believe his eyes. He never saw a Niffler so calm and relaxed like in this moment.
„This is a Niffler… but why is it so calm ? How did you do this ?“
You shrugged. „I don‘t know. I offered the little guy some food and a coin and then I tried to cuddle with him.“
Newt raised an eyebrow and walked up to you, he had to see it closer.
„Huh. That‘s incredible Y/N.“
„Wan‘t to pet it too ?“
„Oh, no thanks, I have some bad experiences with our friend here and I don‘t want to interrupt its calmness, but…“
He moved his hands on your hips and gave you a kiss on your cheek
„I just need to feed a few more creatures and then I‘m done with work for today and I’d love to relax a bit with you, my love.” 

After months of trying to convince my coworker to watch The Force Awakens last night, she finally did. She’s seen the other movies but hadn’t got around to seeing TFA yet and defo hasn’t been keeping up with any rumors. So I asked her what she thought.

“It was really good, I liked it. I felt like the movie was trying to trick me into thinking Luke was Rey’s family, and I just get the vibe she’s not Luke’s daughter. Like this guy saved Vader from the darkside and he’s just gonna abandon his daughter? Nah. I was thinking maybe Obi-wan’s daughter but the timing doesn’t work. Kylo Ren is Vader’s grandson so she’s have to be- Oh! Whoa. Maybe she’s Obi-Wan’s granddaughter!”

“What an impossibly novel concept!”

“Yeah! Oh, that works even better. Obi-Wan and Anakin’s grandkids hooking up and making super powerful babies would be awesome.”

“Oh, you think Kylo Ren and Rey are going to get together?”

“Obviously! Don’t you think so? He was fascinated with her before they even met and once he saw her he was instantly in love. I mean, she’ll have to help him back to the light side so he can see his mom again, but oh yeah, they’re gonna get together. That’s the only thing I’m certain about.”

“…”

“Amber, why are you crying?”

“I’m just so PROUD.”

“In what order to watch Star Wars Saga?”

Wrong question.

The right questions to ask are:

-       Would I have a lump in my throat whenever I hear the line “Why do I get the feeling you are going to be the death of me?” if I didn’t know that in A New Hope Darth Vader killed Obi-Wan?

-       Would watching Anakin and Obi-Wan’s banter be so heart-wrenching if I didn’t know that their relationship fell apart?

-       Would Anakin and Padme’s love story be so star-crossed if I didn’t know that they were doomed from the beginning?

-       Would I have a bitter smile on my face whenever I see happy Anakin on the screen if I didn’t know that he lost everything, got burned up and stuck in the suit for twenty three years?

If the answer to these questions is “No”, you did the right thing by reading the last page of the book first.

Imagine: Obi Wan and Anakin comforting you

For anon… Enjoy and I hope this helps <3

You sat in your bed, the sheets bunched up and a pillow pressed against your chest. Beside you, a hot cup of coffee was resting on the nightstand, thin wisps of vapor streaming out of it’s surface. Your eyes were blurry with salty tears and your hair was a complete mess, sticking out in ways you didn’t even know were possible. You stared at nothing, your thoughts banging madly at your skull. Your head started to pound painfully. 

There was a knock at the door. You jerked sharply in that direction, gasping audibly. The doorknob turned slowly and a familiar face peeked out behind it, smiling warmly at you. 

“Anakin.” You whispered, your mouth curving into a half smile. 

“And Obi Wan!” Came the friendly voice of the Jedi Knight, who pushed passed his padawan and made his way over to you, sitting on your bed. Anakin followed after him, his brows furrowed in worry. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked gently, sitting on the opposite side of you so that you were in between the two Jedi. 

You threw your hands up slightly, shaking your head. 

“I don’t know. Everything.” You answered pathetically. Obi Wan’s arm wound itself around your waist and pulled you against him, your head resting lightly on his shoulder. 

“It’ll be okay.” He cooed quietly, his cheek resting on the top of your hair. You closed your eyes as tears started to brim around them, willing yourself to hold them back. 

“What if it isn’t?” You asked, immediately feeling stupid. 

Anakin’s hand brushed past your arm and intertwined itself in your messy hair, caressing it softly. 

“Everything always turns out okay. In the end.” He whispered and you smiled tinily. 

“You really think so, Ani?” You murmured, nuzzling closer into Obi Wan. 

“Well, I went from being a slave in Tatooine to a Jedi in training.” He said and you could hear the smile in his voice. You smiled as well, feeling a single, hot tear roll down your cheeks and on to Obi Wan’s clothes, who was holding you tightly and saying nothing. 

Lightly, Anakin rested his head on your shoulder and hooked your arm with his, his free hand traveling down to hold yours. You squeezed it gratefully, feeling a tiny bud of warmth glow inside your body. 

For the first time all day, you felt exhaustion start to make your eyelids heavy and you yawned slowly, leaning into Obi Wan. You felt the Jedi smile against your head.

Slowly, unconsciousness poked at the edges of your vision and almost all at once, you slipped away into a peaceful and dreamless sleep. 

@cogairealta got me thinking about how Vader might discover Obi-Wan’s thought’s RE: Vader’s Fall and his Jedi Master’s role in it.

I’m not entirely sure it’s ever going to come up that Obi-Wan considers Vader’s Fall his fault? Obi-Wan’s already internalized that as a fact - but perhaps someone like Qui-Gon, not knowing any better (Qui-Gon does not, in fact, know that Obi-Wan became Anakin’s master) mentions something about Vader’s unhelpful Jedi master to Vader, only to get a face full of sith lightning because Do NOT badmouth Obi-Wan D O N O T. Only after which everyone discovers the truth and makes the connection to all the really vague and disapproving things that Obi-Wan has said about Vader’s Jedi master. 

bc Obi-Wan has already started subtweeting his thoughts about the subject and given his general interpersonal acuity, people are gonna assume he knows what he’s talking about.

anonymous asked:

I'd love to see the trooper's views in all this. Exasperation at Kenobi not taken enough consideration of his safety. Worries that he's not sleeping, forgetting to eat? What did they see that made them go to Yoda for help?

Cody knows his general and his tells. He’s been by his side long enough to have developed a keen eye for all of the—almost invisible—signs that General Kenobi is exhausted.

It’s the small twitch in his eyebrows when he needs to read, the way his fingers twitch while his hands stay clasped behind his back, the way he’ll cover his mouth—pretending to stroke his beard—to keep in a yawn…

A million small signs, not that General Kenobi would ever admit to them.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I wish you would write a fic where Obi-Wan is the first person to know Padmé is pregnant. Literally the first, before even Padmé.

It’s funny because the reason Anakin found out kinda late in canon is because him and Obi-Wan have been out in the Outer Rim on various campaigns that keep rolling into one another so for this to work you’d have to fiddle with some other things first. Like, for instance, why Obi-Wan is apart from Anakin - so I guess I’d start that fic with some explanation for why they’re apart. Maybe its something that Palpatine did or maybe it’s something as simple as Obi-Wan being a few inches to the right at the wrong moment and having to go back to Coruscant for medical reasons.

So, in that case, he comes back to Coruscant early and stops by to see Padme, because he wants to check in, see how she’s doing, maybe update her on how Anakin’s doing, stuff like that. (And, yes, Anakin may have been very embarrassing convincing in getting him to make sure Padme was okay when he came back.)

So he goes to see her, greetings and hugs are exchanged, and then they sit down and Obi-Wan is mentally like ARE YOU SERIOUS? ARE YOU TWO ACTUAL FACTS SERIOUS ABOUT THIS BULLSHIT? WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF A WAR, ARE YOU TWO ACTUALLY HAVING A FUCKING BABY?! I KNOW YOU BOTH KNOW ABOUT BIRTH CONTROL AND CONDOMS, ESPECIALLY YOU ANAKIN - YOU TOLD ME THINGS I DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT VARIOUS KINDS OF BIRTH CONTROL WHEN I TRIED TO GIVE YOU ‘THE TALK’.

So he’s just mentally like *angry face emoji*. And I feel like this might actually be something I’d write as a crack-taken-kinda-seriously fic. Obi-Wan would be like “I cannot possibly return back to the front lines, I have to…water my plants.” And the council is just like “omg, Kenobi wants to TAKE A BREAK?? Yes we are ALL OVER THIS PLAN, THIS IS A GREAT PLAN!!”

And then Obi-Wan is just like “oh, I’m going to just shadow Senator Amidala, for her safety since she’s so important to the war effort, and also coincidently gets free drinks from the Senate when she’s at her office.” And he’s still ike *angry face emoji* at the whole pregnant thing. Meanwhile, Padme is pleased that her friend is back home and able to visit with her so much, especially since Obi-Wan has so many stories about Ani and she is always there for embarrassing stories about Ani’s youth. *Happy face emoji*

And then he manages to get a comm call out to Anakin, through like seven different encrypted, secure lines and is immediately like YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE, YOU ARE GROUNDED! I DON’T CARE THAT YOU’RE TWENTY-THREE AND NO I’M NOT TELLING YOU WHY YOU’RE GROUNDED, YOU JUST ARE! And Anakin is just *confused emoji face*

And then Padme figures out she’s pregnant and Obi-Wan is just like FINALLY, OH MY GOD WHY DID YOU TAKE SO LONG TO FIGURE THAT OUT? And Padme is like I’M PREGNANT!!!?? A BABY WITH ANAKIN??!!! And then she’s like ANI’S STILL ON THE FRONT AND HE DOESN’T KNOW!! *dismayed face emoji*

And then the Chancellor gets kidnapped and Anakin comes back, saves the Chancellor, and comes back to the news that he’s going to be a daddy! And Obi-Wan is like SURELY THIS WILL BE WHEN I GET TO OFFICIALLY KNOW ABOUT THE AFFAIR!! THEY WILL TELL ME ABOUT THE AFFAIR NOW!!

And Padme is like “Obi-Wan has been so helpful since he’s been back and he’ll totally help us! We’re super good friends and he’s missed you so much!” And Anakin’s like I’VE MISSED HIM SO MUCH, I’VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH, I WANT CUDDLES and this means I can tell Obi-Wan everything???

And then they surprise him by going “Obi-Wan, we’re married and expecting a baby!” And Obi-Wan is like WHAT?? I THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST HAVING AN AFFAIR

And Anakin is like *outraged face emoji* I WOULD NEVER HAVE SEX OUTSIDE MARRIAGE, WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR??

And Obi-Wan is like WHEN DID YOU EVEN HAVE THE TIME??

And Padme is finally like HELLO, BIG NEWS OVER HERE?? THERE IS A BABY INSIDE ME!! A BABY!!!

And Obi-Wan is just like I KNEW THAT LITERALLY MONTHS AGO, BECAUSE I KNEW BEFORE YOU DID!! THIS IS NOT NEWS TO ME, YOU KNOW WHAT IS NEWS TO ME?? THIS MARRIAGE!! THIS MARRIAGE THAT YOU TALKED ANAKIN INTO, YOU- YOU -

And Anakin is like O.O! And Padme is like FINISH THAT SENTENCE, I DARE YOU!!!

And that would be the fic.

anonymous asked:

You wrote something for Vader's angst castle/Obiwan's robe being in a chamber with Anakin's old things? (ALSO THIS IS TOTALLY A STAR WARS BEAUTY AND THE BEAST THING. do you know if anyones written soemthing something along those lines?)

I did. It’s called We Walk Through the Fire. I’ve already reblogged it yesterday so I won’t repost it because I’m sure my followers are tired of seeing my random bouts of Obi-Wan Angst. But I’m sure you can find it if you just scroll down a little. I don’t post a great deal so it should be like at most five posts below this.

As for a Star Wars Prequel Beauty and the Beast fic I have not heard of something like that. Especially not Obikin flavored. I’m sure it’s out there somewhere for Anidala  or Vaderdala, or possibly even Quibi? I mean… Liam Neeson has the voice to play the Beast after all and we all know Ewan can sing…

Excuse me, I’m getting distracted.

I’m going to put this out into the ether of tumblr and consult the group conciousness.

DOES ANYBODY KNOW ABOUT A BEAUTY AND THE BEAST-ESQUE STAR WARS STORY LIKE NONY IS REQUESTING? IT DOES NOT NEED TO INCLUDE OBI-WAN’S RATTY OLD DESERT ROBE BUT SHOULD DEFINITELY INVOLVE SOME GLOWING TRANSFORMATIONS AND/OR POSSIBLY DARTH VADER CRISPY OR OTHERWISE.

Thanks for stopping by, Nony! Grab some cookies on your way out! ^__^

anonymous asked:

3, 8 and 14 for Obi-Wan please? I love your drabbles! :D

Thank you! I’m glad you like them! Hopefully you like this one as well :)

Obi Wan +  “I left for five minutes. How did you find trouble so quickly?” +  “You’re incredibly persistent, I’ll give you that.” +  “By all means, antagonize the angry beast. See where that gets you.”


Staring out at the brush where your blaster laid, internally scolding yourself for having lost your grip on it. What had started as a seamless mission soon became a festering frustration for you. Flaring your nostrils you suddenly heard Obi Wan from behind you.

“Watch after our things (Y/N). We will need to be on the move before sun down.”

You nodded, “Of course.”

“Alright, I’ll be back in a moment.”

Still staring forward you heard the slight crunching of leaves as Obi Wan walked off into the deep jungle like surroundings. He had told you not to worry about it, just to leave it. It’s just a blaster (Y/N), he had said. You however were not so easily disuadded or distracted. The blaster was by far the best you had owned in years. 

With a deep breath you slowly closed your eyes for a moment, attempting to center yourself. If it worked for Obi Wan and Anakin, it could surely do you some good. Force sensitive or not. Finally feeling confident in your abilities you jumped into the air and gripped onto the branch closest to your reach. With a firm grip you hoisted yourself up. Carefully shimmying down the branch you made your way towards your blaster.

Unfortunately for you, just beneath the branch and sitting in front of the brush where your blaster laid was a sleeping Jakobeast. Though they weren’t inherently dangerous, you were certainly warned against antagonizing them. 

Slowly you tried to creep your way further down the branch when suddenly you slipped. With your heart practically flying out of your chest from surprise you tightly gripped onto the branch as you now dangled from it. To only worsen your luck, a piece of the branch had fallen and hit the creature below you in the head. With a grunt and a growl it awoke.

Feeling your heart begin to pound furiously against your chest as the beast looked up to you, you began attempting to pull yourself up. As you did Obi Wan returned, instantly rushing to see what you were up to.

“I left for five minutes. How did you find trouble so quickly?”

You grunted in your efforts to hold onto the branch, attempting to give him a smug shrug of your shoulders.

“I need my blaster, but this tree apparently had other plans.”

Obi Wan shook his head faintly as he pointed to you with somewhat of a smirk.

“You’re incredibly persistent, I’ll give you that.”

Seeing the beast try to lunge up towards you, likely seeing you as a threat, you quickly kicked one of its horns as it groaned in response. Obi Wan rolled his eyes.

“By all means, antagonize the angry beast. See where that gets you.”

You scowled at him for a moment before you finally supported yourself on the branch.

“Don’t nag me, I’ve got this.”

Obi Wan smirked as he held up his hand with a sudden swoosh passing your ears. Looking over to him you noticed your blaster now in his grip.

“Clearly.”

So you know this part of The Attack of the Clones:


Every time I see it. No matter how serious the gifset. My mind just keeps telling me that what is currently going though Anakin’s mind at this exact moment is:

“I had a dream like this once. If this ends up like my dream did tonight will be a very good night.”

Literally every single time, no matter what. That is what my brain tells me.