i cry at the last two songs every time

4

“In Wonderland.“Taylor Swift Art Challenge: 1989 - Track 14 Wonderland

happy 8.13.

This is the one song everyone
would like to learn: the song
that is irresistible:

the song that forces men
to leap overboard in squadrons
even though they see the beached skulls

the song nobody knows
because anyone who has heard it
is dead, and the others can’t remember.

Shall I tell you the secret
and if I do, will you get me
out of this bird suit?

I don’t enjoy it here
squatting on this island
looking picturesque and mythical

with these two feathery maniacs,
I don’t enjoy singing
this trio, fatal and valuable.
 
I will tell the secret to you,
to you, only to you.
Come closer. This song
 
is a cry for help: Help me!
Only you, only you can,
you are unique
 
at last. Alas
it is a boring song
but it works every time.
—  Margaret Atwood, “Siren Song”

@sparkofthevoid​ tagged me to do the thing, so here it is :)

Rules: Answer these questions and tag nine people you’d like to get to know better.

Relationship status: Single af

Favorite color: it changes constantly, but aquamarine and black

Lipstick or chapstick: lipstick all the way bby. currently rocking Video Vixen from wet n wild. 

Last song: I can’t remember if it was Lose Your Soul from Dead Man’s Bones or Disposable from Cameron Avery. It could honestly be either, I listen to these two songs so much it’s kinda embarrassing. 

Last movie:  The Blindside, I love this movie, it makes me cry every time I watch it.

Top three tv shows: that are still airing or overall?? that are still airing it’s gotta be Brooklyn 99, How To Get Away With Murder (did anyone see that season finale??? I have so many feelings about it, I fucking swear) and Game of Thrones (Y’all waiting for the last season is killing me!!). Of all time Sons of Anarchy (I will never be over Opie, that shit is ingrained in my soul. Also fuck kurt sutter for what they did to Juice.) Sense8 (I will forever cry about Sense8. fuck you netflix, you fucking suck) and Batman: The Animated Series (this is what started my life long and devotion to the caped crusader) 

Three ships: Sterek (obvi), Peraltiago (the most pure ship I’ve ever shipped), and Stony

I’m tagging:  @aureate-laureate @saltwaterwoods @smowkie @anodyneer @merakieros @rambledean @rainsoakedsam @grangersdragon @chibiactionhero

it’s been two weeks i have been listening to nothing but all time low i own last young renegade and so wrong it’s right i got all time low merch for my birthday i ship jalex i was literally just crying over jalex videos half an hour ago i’m following the band on every social media platform i use i run an all time low fanblog i read fanfiction i have made numerous icons and phone backgrounds all of my ringtones are all time low songs

@peritheperidot what have you done to me

tbh i still can’t believe this was all bc of that picture of alex gaskarth

I was tagged by @meditaris-avena to do this so uhhhhhere we go

A – Age: 14, i’m but a child

B - Biggest Fear: certain songs or fairy circles

C- Current Time: 4:53 pm

D - Drink You Last Had: water (so interesting, georgia)

E - Every Day Starts With: figuring out what’s wrong today/if i’m able to go to school

F - Favorite Song: fake happy by paramore atm. it changes like, every two days but

G- Ghosts, Are They Real: I doubt it. Not physically at least

H – Hometown: yeah

I - In Love With: my beautiful friends whomb i love

J - Jealous Of: happy people

K - Killed Someone: god i hope not

L - Last Time You Cried: literally im crying right now im not joking my life is very sad

N - Number of Siblings: two sisters, one older, one younger

O - One Wish: this is terryfying im so scared of wishes

P - Person You Last Called/Texted: edie stars-and-honey what a lad

Q - Questions You’re Always Asked: so where are you from? no like, where are you from?

R - Reasons To Smile: i love my friedns

S - Song Last Sang: last of the real ones by fall out boy (i’m actually singng it as i type this wow)

T - Time You Woke Up: 6:00 then i went to sleep again then 9:45

U - Underwear Color: shit man idk

V - Vacation Destination: did someone say new zealand bc i heard new zealand

W - Worst Habit: i use mean humor (e.g calling someone a loser and not meaning it) far too much and at inappropriate times bc i cant read social queues aa

X - X-Rays You’ve Had: wrist like 4 times, i’ve had an eeg if that counts as like a brain x-ray?

Y - Your Favorite Food: i really like raspberries but i don’t think i have a favourite

Z - Zodiac Sign: capricorn (but i dnt think it really fits)

y e e t i tag @stars-and-honey @flcphowellester @alien-they and whoever else wants to do this

"Is There Somewhere" by Halsey

A/n: I LOVE this song omg so I was really excited when i got this request! It’s my first song request so idk how it is but tell me what y'all think please! :)

Warning: Mild smut??

Pairing: Luke + Y/N


You were dancing in your tube socks in our hotel room, flashing those eyes like highway signs.
Light one up and hand it over, rest your head upon my shoulder.
I just wanna feel your lips against my skin.

You didn’t know what to call your relationship with Luke. Toxic? Destructive? Ethereal? Perfect? No word seemed to sum up what you had developed over the past few months with Luke. He would tell you that you were the only one he wanted to be with. But then, then you would see pictures of him with another girl on his arm, almost every other night. So what was he really thinking?

But you didn’t care. You know why? Because you were falling for him. Plain and simple.

Memories of the two of you flashed your mind as you were pressed up against his side in bed, legs tangled with one another, his arm slung around your waist with his shallow breathing resonating in the night.

That time you decided to play your playlist in his hotel room and dance around in what he called your ‘awfully too colourful tube socks’, in nothing but one of his flannels. Or the time both of you went cake testing just for the hell of it, icing being smushed onto each other’s faces, laughter bringing a smile to the elderly couple next to you.

People could have mistaken you guys as a couple. But he never put a label. Never denied the rumours either that you were his girlfriend though. Conflicting right?


White sheets, bright lights, crooked teeth, and the night life.
You told me this is right where it begins.
But your lips hang heavy underneath me.
And I promised myself I wouldn’t let you complete me.

“What are we doing?” You panted, hands tangled in his blonde locks as he worked to make you melt in his arms by attacking his lips, tongue, and teeth all over your neck and into the valley of your breasts.

“Hmm.” He hummed in response, oblivious to the seriousness behind your tone. “Luke.” You pushed him away from you, still close enough to you as you ran your hands down his chest and to his abs.

He finally looked up at you, a smirk on his face. “This is right where it begins baby.” He murmured as he placed his soft lips on yours, much less animalistic than a minute ago.

He led you to the China doll white sheets of his bed and hovered above you, your legs embracing his torso as he sucked on your neck, a soft moan being let out by you. You writhed underneath him, wanting nothing more than to feel every inch of him that you could. You couldn’t resist him and that was the scary part. You flipped him over as he grinned at you, clearly liking the dominance you possessed. His lips were heavy underneath you as you unclasped your bra, leaning back down to slip your tongue in his mouth, savouring his taste, feeling the bliss of his lip ring teasing you.

And you knew that right there, after the countless promises you made in your head about not falling, not opening your heart up, not breaking down the walls you’ve spent years to create, he completed you. Unrequited love was the absolute worst.


I’m trying not to let it show, that I don’t want to let this go.
Is there somewhere you can meet me?
Cause I clutched your arms like stairway railings.
And you clutched my brain and eased my ailing.

You watched as he packed his suitcase in front you, carelessly throwing his wardrobe about, finally glancing back at you. You stood there, leaning against his dresser as you observed the mess he was stewing into his suitcase, a sour look on your face as you processed the words he said to you moments before.

“So you’re just leaving?” You asked, trying not to make it so obvious that you cared. “Babe.” He walked towards, putting his arms around your waist. “Don’t worry okay? I’ll be back. Not like we haven’t spent literally everyday of the past 2 weeks together.” He muttered, walking back to his suitcase as you stood there, mouth slightly open at his blatant comment.

“Tell me what you really think Luke.” You said, annoyed at his attitude. What happened to it just being you and him? The promising words he whispered to you at night, the soothing caresses, the hot trail of kisses he traced onto your body, the grinding and massaging and gripping of each other was embedded into your mind.

All the times he’s told you he wanted to be with you, his lips tempting you to stay the night, his words convincing you he may feel the exact same way you do, was it all just a lie?

He rolled his eyes at you, clearly done with the conversation. You internally groaned, he never talked about what he was feeling. Especially when it came to you.

It made it that much harder to articulate whether or not he felt more than what he was leading on.


You’re writing lines about me; romantic poetry.
Your girl’s got red in her cheeks, cause we’re something she can’t see.
And I try to refrain but you’re stuck in my brain.
And all I do is cry and complain because second’s not the same.

There wasn’t a day that went by without you not thinking about Luke. Every time you tried to make the thoughts disappear, they remained cemented in your brain, and all you could do was let them consume you. You were in a state of euphoria. You didn’t want him to leave your head because that was the only place where you could be with him.

You heard the songs he’s been singing on tour. They sounded oddly familiar to what you two have been through for the last 5 months. Was he writing lines about you? It sounded like divine poetry to your ears though. The simplest lyrics could hold the deepest meanings.

But were they about you? Or that girl you saw in pictures leave his hotel room?

After multiple “reassurances” that you were the only one he wanted, you weren’t quite sure if you believed him.

“Is that what you say to them as well?” You scoffed, practically seeing the roll of his eyes even through the phone.

“Baby I’ll be home soon and I can make you forget about all this okay? Trust me.”

And you did. You trusted him. But love can be ever so blinding and with the various talks from your family and friends that he wasn’t the one for you, you didn’t know what to think anymore.


I’m sorry but I fell in love tonight.
I didn’t mean to fall in love tonight.
You’re looking like you fell in love tonight.
Could we pretend that we’re in love?

He came back. He was drunk. Raw, sexual desire was in his eyes as you let him take you, craving the impassioned touches and the fervent lips colliding, hands sensually traveling down each other’s bodies. He was impatient, obsessing over your every move as you pulled him to your bedroom. It was maddening, watching him go home with other women on tour, smirk on his face as he leaned into their touch. Just like how he did with you.

You were lying in bed, nothing but the bright lights of the night shimmering through your room, illuminating his face in the most enchanting way. You longed for him all those months he was away, infatuated by him. But you knew deep down inside it was more than just a compulsive, mesmeric urge to be with him.

It was love.

But you knew, he didn’t reciprocate those feelings. If only you could pretend that you were both in love, utterly and completely in love. You didn’t mean for this to happen, but life always threw curve balls when you least expected them right?

So as you nuzzled your face in his neck, curling yourself into him as his breath fanned over your forehead, you couldn’t help but think about what it would be like if he actually called you his girlfriend. If he actually expressed to you what he was feeling. But you knew it would never happen.

“I’m sorry that I fell in love tonight.” You whispered, clutching onto him in the hopes that maybe, just maybe he would feel the same way.

This is the one song everyone
would like to learn: the song
that is irresistible:

the song that forces men
to leap overboard in squadrons
even though they see the beached skulls

the song nobody knows
because anyone who has heard it
is dead, and the others can’t remember.

Shall I tell you the secret
and if I do, will you get me
out of this bird suit?

I don’t enjoy it here
squatting on this island
looking picturesque and mythical

with these two feathery maniacs,
I don’t enjoy singing
this trio, fatal and valuable.

I will tell the secret to you,
to you, only to you.
Come closer. This song

is a cry for help: Help me!
Only you, only you can,
you are unique

at last. Alas
it is a boring song
but it works every time.

—  Margaret Atwood, Siren Song
Falling doesn’t happen softly, no matter how many times you catch the ground. The bruises will always match the punches thrown, but I’ll dig a home with my fingers if I could kiss your lungs again. I’d skip a beat just to hear yours, but good wasn’t meant for the living anyway. Tears make cuts cry, but pouring salt in my  wounds is the only way pain visits. Voices all sound the same at 2am when all I see is your face. If I took the robins song, could you song along? Melodies were meant for two and every note sounds empty without you. Goodnight kisses the mountains last, but no matter how many times I open the door its never you.  I’m sorry we drowned in December and bled out April. For the kisses that were never long enough. The hugs that didn’t heal. The minutes we watched tick into tomorrow. The silence we let grow into monsters we couldn’t tame and the anger we drank to. I write letters just to see how they feel. These eyes are two years past longing. Three wishes turned into a series of dots that end all sentences. The only thing time wants back is you.
—  Every goodbye tears off the bandaid// Maybe I’m forgetting how to heal.

anonymous asked:

do you have any songs to listen to while reading ereri smut owo

Ummm… I have songs that I listen to while writing smut ahahahah

Dear followers, I need your help with something! I don’t usually ask for much, so I would really appreciate it you could all help me out! My goal for this post is for yelyahwilliams to read this post. And I’ll tell you why.

I have been a huge fan of Paramore since before Riot! came out, which was in 2007. The moment I heard their music, I wanted to listen to it all. So I went to the local music store and bought all their albums up to date. I spent hours listening to their music, watching videos online and learning about the band. I thought Hayley was the most beautiful person on this planet - still do - and I begged my parents to let me dye my hair orange like hers was at the time. They said no, because I was like, 13 years old, but you can’t blame a girl for trying haha.

Three and a half years later, I was in a relationship that took a huge emotional toll on me. He played terrible, terrible mind games with me, and mentally abused me to the point where I had driven myself to get panic attacks and anxiety. Being so young, and so easily influenced by other people, I got forced to do several things I didn’t necessarily want to. I got into hard drugs and was self harming myself almost every day. I attempted to commit suicide over four times, and thought about it more times I could count on my hands and feet. The times I tried never worked out - thankfully - and the times I thought about it, there was something that stopped me from hurting myself. Eventually, sometime during my sophomore year, he broke up with me causing me to fall in a dark, downward spiral of depression at the age of 15/16 years old. I thought he and I were going to be together for the rest of my life, as silly as that sounds now, but I was so in love that I fell for anything.

Fast forward two more years later, I’m almost 19 years old and graduating high school. Things, for the most part, had gotten a little better. I still had anxiety and panic attacks, and I was still depressed from the relationship I had been in for two and a half years that ended so quickly out of no where. Although I was healthier and better off without him, I was still depressed to the point where half of the time I didn’t want to leave my house. Mind you, I still hadn’t seen Paramore live yet, so when my best friend Courtney messaged me saying that Paramore was touring with Fall Out Boy and were coming near us, we immediately bought tickets. I was still a huge fan of Paramore, but hadn’t had much time to listen to their new album Paramore, so when we went to the show in the summer, it was sort of a surprise to me. I sobbed the entire time she sang, just so in shock that I was actually seeing one of my biggest idols live, after waiting for that moment for almost seven years. 

Hayley gave a short speech during the middle of her setlist, talking about how the next song she was about to sing was slow and was about where her heart was. “It’s called Last Hope,” she said. “Sing along if you know the words.” I, unfortunately didn’t know the words, so as she sang I kept quiet. And I’m so fucking thankful that I was able to listen to the lyrics live for the first time, because I was so moved by each and every word in the song. It hit home, so hard, and I couldn’t help myself from crying even harder. My two best friends were standing beside me, and they noticed how emotional I was about the lyrics, they turned over to me, smiled and continued to give me a big hug. 

In that moment of hearing that song for the first time, I knew exactly what she was talking about and what she meant in the song, because I had been there a few years before. I had been in the exact same position she was singing about, and it meant so much to me that one of the people I look up to the most was singing about it. I didn’t know who I was, and I thought I would be happy during the time of my abusive relationship. I used to tell myself every single night, “tomorrow will be better” but in reality, nothing was different, I just fell back into the routine I was stuck in. It was so unhealthy, and I was so miserable, but every time I was about to give up, there was something in the back of my head telling me, “Jenna, you’re worth this, just keep trying.” So I did.

Last Hope has helped me so much since the first time I heard it live. It had such a positive message, that I had been hoping to hear from everyone for years. It helped me through the rest of the summer. It helped me through fall. It helped me through the winter so far. And for that, I want to personally thank Hayley Williams, and ask for a very huge favor from you.

Hayley, if for some reason you actually do end up reading this, first of all: hi I love you so much thank you haha, but what I was really hoping for is that if you could write out my first tattoo for me. At first I was originally going to get some of the lyrics tattooed on me in a regular font, but I felt like that wouldn’t have as much significance to it as it would be if you wrote it out personally. You have saved my life, and I want to be able to look at my tattoo every morning and remind myself that I’m here for a reason. And even though it may not be much, but there will always be a reason to keep me going.

So, to all my followers who have taken the time to read this. I need you to spread it like wildfire. Reblog it, send it to her, tell her about this post. Tweet a link to the post to her. Anything. I want Hayley to see this post and read it so she can see how much she’s positively impacted my life and how much it would mean to me if she wrote out my tattoo.

Here are all the ways you can get in touch with me if you ever end up seeing this,

Personal tumblr - tweenspirits
Multifandom tumblr - doncstor
Twitter - @awildjenngar
Email - awildjenngar@gmail.com

To anyone to reblogs this, thank you for helping me out. 
To anyone reading this who has gone through some of the same struggles as myself, it gets better. Just keep going.
And to Hayley Williams, thank you for saving my life.

It’s just a spark, but it’s enough to keep me going.
And when it’s dark out, no ones around, it keeps glowing.

With much love,
Jenna