i could say more but it speaks for itself

The origin and meaning of Yuuri Katsuki’s name

So, I just had the most interesting YOI conversation with my cousin, a Japanese student. Here’s what I learned about Yuuri Katsuki’s name:

1. His last name

In kanji, ‘Katsuki’ is written as ‘勝生’; the first character, 勝, means ‘victory’ or ‘to win’ but can also mean ‘winner’ (shall I say ‘victor’) if you add the right suffix. Now the second character, 生, means ‘student’. so Yuuri’s last name literally means ‘student of a winner’ or ‘student of a victor’. I think this speaks for itself and I could just end this post here, but there’s more.

2. His first name

Yuuri, ‘勇利’ in kanji; ‘勇’ means ‘bravery’ or ‘courage’ and ‘利’ means ‘benefit’, so his first name means ‘one, who benefits from courage/bravery’.
succeeds through courage?

tl;dr - Katsuki Yuuri means ‘student of a victor who benefits from courage’ and I think that is beautiful.

(special thanks to @did-you-say-food for telling me about this, you’re the best)

(I’m sure someone already analysed Yuuri’s name but I was so excited I just wanted to make a post about this with the information I got)

Behind Closed Doors // A Thomas Smut

Prompt: It is forbidden at all costs to sleep with the only girl in the glade, but that’s not gonna stop Thomas from being with her in the slightest.

Relationship: Thomas x Reader

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit Sexual Content, Smut, Sneaking Around, Swearing, Dirty Talk, Slightly Rough Thomas I Guess, Sexual Harassment, and Super Fucking Sexy Thomas Because Come On.

Word Count: 6,863

A/N: Because I was in the mood for some maze runner smut.

Your name: submit What is this?

Not being able to hold back the pleasure built up inside of me any longer, I let out a loud moan the second Thomas reattached his lips on my pulse point and nibbled on it. His chest pushing up against me rubbed my back on the wall and his fingers lightly grazed me over my soaking wet panties, sending excited shivers down my spine. My entire body was begging for more of him, but I knew that we wouldn’t have enough time out here to have sex and make it back.

“Thomas, we need to go back to the glade.” I tried, but he didn’t stop what he was doing. Instead he just pushed my panties to the side with his fingers. “We still have to map out what we saw before we forget it and it gets dark.”

“We’re not gonna forget.” He hummed against my neck, his voice vibrating my skin.

“Babe, we don’t have time for sex.” I disagreed, but immediately whimpered when his middle finger slid through my folds and separated them.

“Who said anything about sex?” Thomas smirked, applying pressure on my clitoris and slowly circling it. “I just want to make my girl feel good before we have to pretend like we’re not together.”

I wanted to protest and I wanted to be responsible here, but as he worked my nub in such an incredible and addictive way, I couldn’t find the will to actually stop him. I knew we wouldn’t have the same freedom in the glade that we have out here in the maze, thanks to Alby’s most strict rule of No one ever touches (Y/N) because she’s the only female and whomever does will be punished, so I decided to just give into him and let Thomas do whatever he wanted to me.

I brought my hands up to his neck and pulled him away from mine to attach his lips on my own. Our kiss was passionate and full of lust, his tongue already gliding on the bottom of my lip to ask for an entrance. I opened my mouth for him to slip his tongue inside and I instantly moaned at how skillful he was with it.

Thomas’ finger increased its pace against my nub, my hips bucking at the delicious feeling. The way he was working on me made me feel so hazy that I couldn’t even focus on kissing him correctly, my mouth too lazy to properly move. All I could do was allow the pleasure to build up inside of me and moan into his mouth as Thomas now used his finger to slide inside of my warmth. My hands gripped onto his neck tighter in response along with my arching back and my secret boyfriend smirked against my lips. My eyes fell shut to the incredible sensations he was provoking, but a whine escaped my mouth when he broke our kiss.

“Does this feel good?” He teased, his finger slowly pumping inside of my core.

I just nodded, my body too lost in the pleasure to be able to form any sentence or say a single word for that matter. Thomas knew exactly how much it turned me on when he talked dirty to me and I didn’t even need to open my eyes to know he was grinning smugly at me right now. His finger moved a little faster inside of me before I could even ask and the shameless moan that escaped my lips would’ve been embarrassing if I wasn’t too lustful at this moment.

“Do you want another one?” Thomas smirked, the movements of his finger bringing me close to my peak. I nodded my head and he just tsked sexily. “I need you to say it, baby.”

“Y-Yes.” I somehow managed to speak through the desire and Thomas immediately responded.

Another finger of his pushed itself into my core and I hitched my leg around his waist for him to have more access. Thomas moaned at my sudden action and instantly pushed his fingers deeper, an immediate mixture of a moan and a scream falling from my lips. I didn’t care that I was so loud and open with Thomas, our relationship was too intimate for me to worry about being vulnerable around him.

“T-Thomas, please.” I begged him for my orgasm and, believe it or not, his pace increased even more.

The spring in my stomach was coiling more with every passing second and Thomas definitely knew. With his other hand, my boyfriend slipped it under my shirt and runner gear to squeeze my breast. His hand began kneading it, Thomas’ calloused fingers tightly pinching my nipple and it was enough to further the pulsing in my core. I desperately wanted his mouth attached to my perky bud but I knew that that wouldn’t be possible thanks to the annoying runner’s wear and how incredibly difficult it was to remove.

It was when Thomas curled his fingers inside of me to press against my G-spot he was well aware of and his thumb put unbelievable pressure on my clit that I couldn’t hold it back anymore. The spring inside of me snapped, releasing the extremely anticipated orgasm all throughout my body. My back arched, my legs shook and a mixture of embarrassing moans with lustful screams erupted from my chest.

“Shit, baby, you sound and look so beautiful.” Thomas moaned, my mouth only able to moan in response.

Once I whimpered at how sensitive I’ve become, Thomas carefully removed his fingers from inside of me and gently placed my leg back on the ground. His other hand detached from my breast and fixed my shirt so it looked like nothing happened. As soon as I opened my eyes, the first sight I saw was Thomas happily sucking on his fingers that worked on me. His tongue grazed his skin and, even though I just came, this sexy sight immediately made me ready for another orgasm with him. He smirked at how in awe I was and I almost melted right then and there when he winked. Pulling his fingers out of his mouth, Thomas adjusted my jeans and I watched him with hooded eyes.

Bringing my back off of the maze’s wall and managing to stand on my own, a grin spread across my lips with a deviant idea. Thomas’ eyebrows quirked up at me before I prepared myself for what I was about to do.

“Last one to the map room is a rotten shank!” I challenged, immediately sprinting towards the glade.

Looking behind me with a huge smile planted on my face, I realized Thomas instantly played along and was already hot on my trail. We both ran like maniacs towards the door with joy flooding through our veins and not a single care in the world. Considering Thomas and I are the best runners in the glade, it didn’t take long for us to maneuver our way through the maze and quickly reach the entrance. An excited squeal escaped my lips when I looked behind me and realized Thomas was no longer there, but was now right beside me. The wind blew in my hair and stung my face, yet all I could focus on was how beautiful and happy my boyfriend looked as we suddenly entered the glade and rushed towards the map room already in sight. The two of us completely ignored all of the stares and shouts the gladers were sending us, both too consumed by each other.

“No, no, no!” I screamed when he started winning, but it was no use. Thomas was just as determined as I was. It’s our best, but also most annoying quality.

“See you on the other side, rotten shank!” He shouted back at me, not even bothering to turn around before reaching the map room and quickly opening the door.

“Thomas!” I tried to stop him, but of course it didn’t work.

My boyfriend rushed inside and I groaned when he beat me at my own game. Running in after him, Thomas’ smirk was wide and smug as I shut the door to the map room behind us. That’s always how our sessions worked, behind closed doors to avoid getting caught. I wish that we could be open about our relationship, but at the same time I like how the adrenaline flows through our veins every time we meet in secret. With the door closed every facade falls. The disguise we display to the world fades away and all we desire is to fuck each other’s brains out.

“I’m glad you could finally come.” He teased and I narrowed my eyes at him as I approached Thomas slowly.

“Well, it’s a good thing I already did.” I clicked my tongue, Thomas’ eyebrows quirking at my comment. “Because something tells me if you keep this up, you won’t.”

“Oh, is someone upset I won?” Thomas grinned, the both of us now inches apart from each other. “Can’t handle being slower than me, can you?”

I decided to ignore him and just glare at him instead of saying anything, hoping it would make him take back what he just said. But, no. An even wider and cockier smile pulled at the corner of his lips and as much as I hated to admit it, he looked incredibly sexy.

“Screw you, Thomas.”

“If you insist.” He shrugged before grabbing my cheeks and crashing his lips against mine.

I instantly moaned into his mouth, his impressive lips molding with my own in such perfect harmony. If there’s something Thomas certainly knows how to do is kiss me like there’s no tomorrow, always making my knees go with with his touch. His tongue didn’t even ask for an entrance instead he just pushed it past my lips and made its way onto mine, the both of them waltzing together so beautifully that no dancer could ever compare. Our love so much more stunning than any piece of art out there in the world.

Thomas’ hand wrapped around my waist to push my chest into his warm one as he backed our bodies up to the nearest table. Our kiss never broke even when he cleared all of the pens, pencils, papers, and pieces of scrap with one swift movement of his hand off the table. Excitement boiling inside of me as his hands settled on my ass to pull me up on it and sit me down on the surface. My legs instantly spread for him at the same time that Thomas began unzipping my jeans and pulling them down, my lack of air starting to make me feel light-headed. My jeans were pooling down on the floor when I decided to separate our kiss, begrudgingly, and my hands flew to his belt. As I unbuckled it, Thomas removed my leather runner’s gear. At the same time that I opened his pants and let it fall to the ground, my boyfriend pulled at the hem of my shirt telling me he wanted it off. My shirt was the first to go then his and as soon as we were only in our underwear, Thomas’ mouth immediately latched onto my breast to give it the attention it desperately wanted earlier.

Even though his warm and wet mouth working on my nipple turned me on immensely, there was nothing I craved more than to feel him inside of me. As soon as I tugged at his boxers, Thomas got the message. He bit down on my nipple, a squeal escaping my lips, and pulled at it with his teeth before taking his mouth off of my breast with a pop.

I brought his boxers down to his knees and instinctively wrapped my hand around his delicious shaft, not being able to hold back how much I craved to touch him. As I slowly pumped his erection, my thumb caressing his swollen and wet with precum tip, Thomas growled at the feeling and ripped apart my panties all of a sudden. Even though I wanted to get mad at him considering I only have three, well now two, I couldn’t find it in myself to be anything but turned on by his lustful actions.

Putting his lips back onto mine, Thomas spread my legs for him to stand in between. One of his hands settled on my waist as the other removed mine from his cock to position himself in my entrance, moans escaping both of our lips when he wet his tip with my juices. His swollen head sliding amongst my folds and caressing my clitoris, my chest already arching into his at the contact. It’s not my fault I easily come undone with Thomas, it’s his fault for being so damn sexy all the time.

Thomas pressed himself into my core and our breaths hitched in our throats as he slowly stretched me, both of us melting into the incredible feeling. His hand on my waist moved to my lower back so he could push me closer to him, his dick entering deeper inside of me. My eyes immediately shut at the fullness and Thomas’ head fell to my shoulder, his lips placing gentle kisses on my skin. Once he was buried deep inside of me, my boyfriend didn’t even need to wait before thrusting thanks to how turned on and ready I was for him.

Thomas started out at a normal pace, enjoying the feeling of our bodies connected again. We haven’t had sex in about a week because sex in the maze is careless and dangerous and it’s been nearly impossible in the glade because of all the attention he was getting lately. So, needless to say, we’ve been craving each other too much and the built up sexual tension between us is so strong it almost hurts.

Just as he increased his thrusting, Thomas’ free hand moved up to my neck and gripped onto the back of my hair. I whimpered in response and he smiled into my shoulder blade. We didn’t talk about it because it was just a normal thing, but the both of us absolutely love it when Thomas pulls my hair. It’s our favorite kink we share and have no shame in falling prey to it. The way he pounds into me as he grabs my hair, his fingers intertwining with the strands, was so exciting to us.

“Thomas!” A voice suddenly called from outside of the map room and before we even knew it or could do anything to stop what was about to happen, the door flew open. “Are you alright? Why were you guys running so fa-”

My eyes widened in fear as Gally appeared in front of us, his sentence immediately stopping as soon as he caught sight of Thomas fucking me. Who had instantly halted his actions when he realized we were no longer alone and picked up his head from my shoulder to look at the intruder with not only a shocked expression, but a glare blazing in his brown eyes.

Gally’s pupils fell to our connected and wet groins, Thomas growling when he did. As soon as he began to pull out, a moan escaping my lips at the most inappropriate time thanks to the friction, the now terrified glader immediately backed away. Turning around to face the door, Gally ran out of the map room without another word.

“T-Thomas, he’s gonna go tell Alby.” I panicked the moment Gally was gone. “We s-should stop.”

“No.” Thomas grunted, pushing back inside of me and picking up his thrusts again. “We just have to be fast before they get here.”

“Thomas, you’re gonna get in trouble.”
I argued, but moaned loudly when his tip hit my most sensitive spot he was very well aware of.

“I’m gonna get in trouble either way.” He stated, his pace fast and hard. The desk pounding against the wall along with his thrusts, our breathing in sync with the rhythm as well. “Might as well enjoy this last moment I have with you.”

His words stung in my heart the second he finished saying them because we knew Alby wouldn’t take this “crime” lightly. Thomas was going to get punished and fear mixed with the lust in my veins at what exactly said punishment consists of.

“Okay, then you’re gonna want to go harder than that.” I teased, my hands now flying to grip his flexed biceps in preparation.

Thomas followed my directions instantly and pounded harder into me, my body already getting a taste of the sweet edge it will soon be falling over. His mouth crashed back onto mine and kissed me like there was no tomorrow. I kissed him back with as much fervor and passion, neither one of us wanting to say goodbye through words so we let our bodies do it instead. Which at the end of the day, would do a much better job than anything our minds can come up with. Thomas’ and my body are so in sync with each other that they just know exactly how to express our care and love without needing to fumble over sentences.

“I-I’m close.” I confessed, feeling my orgasm creeping up on me.

Thomas’ hand that was on my waist moved to our connecting groins and began to furiously circle my clit, my legs already shaking in response. I tried to kiss him back as focused as I could, but it was too hard to concentrate when I knew I was about to fall apart. Thomas, however, did an amazing job keeping our kiss going and he even slipped his tongue inside of my mouth.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” I shouted, no longer concerned about hiding my moans.

The second Thomas applied more pressure onto my nub and, suddenly, pulled at my hair, I lost it. I completely fell over the edge and jumped into the overwhelming pool of pleasure waiting for me, my orgasm touching my skin like water in a lake. Clenching down on his cock, Thomas let out a strangled moan and the sound itself would’ve made me cum a second time.

Once I came back down from my high, I noticed Thomas was still chasing after his release. Bringing my mouth to his earlobe, I nibbled on it and ignored the sensitivity in my core. I was just as determined to have him orgasm as he was.

“It’s okay, baby.” I whispered into his ear, my boyfriend shuttering at the feeling of my warm breath fanning across his sweaty skin. “Forget the world outside and just cum for me, Thomas.”

With the mixture of my dirty words and my core purposely clenching down on him, Thomas moaned into my mouth as he finally reached his much anticipated orgasm. At the same time that he pulled out to release on my stomach, four unexpected figures suddenly appeared at the doorway and my body froze. Thomas didn’t even notice them, his eyes were shut tight in focus and he grunted loudly as his hot cum coated my skin. It wasn’t until then that I noticed just who was at the door, all of their eyes wide and jaws dropped in complete shock.

Gally, Alby, Newt, and Minho’s terrified eyes averted from the scene before them and all of the lust inside of me was replaced with horror. The four keepers of the glade just witnessed their newest Greenie cumming on the only girl here. My cheeks immediately felt hot and I knew they were painted with red blushes.

“What’s wrong, baby?” Thomas’ husky voice snapped me out of my fear and my eyes shifted to look at him. He was furrowing his eyebrows at me in confusion and all I could do was stare.

“Thomas clean her up and meet us outside.” Alby spoke up with a voice full of authority and my boyfriend gasped. “Now.”

He didn’t even dare to turn around, I just watched as Thomas’ face became as red as mine. Alby quickly turned around and left, the three other boys following in his footsteps.

“Thomas, I’m scared.” I confessed, my concerned eyes piercing into his. “I don’t want to lose you.”

A soft and genuine smile appeared on his lips as my boyfriend placed his hand on my flushed cheek.

“You won’t.” He promised and I believed him.

Thomas grabbed what was left of my torn panties and used the cloth to clean his release off of me. As soon as he finished, both of us quietly put our clothes back on. Our minds too full of thoughts about what we were going to face to put together a conversation.

“Ready?” He asked me, his hand about to push open the door.

“Ready.” I nodded.

Slipping my hand into his free one, Thomas opened the door and lead us out into the glade. My heart beat violently against my ribcage as we approached the group of people formed in front of the maze’s doors, Alby already staring at us with his arms folded across his chest. I noticed how it was getting darker by the second, meaning the doors to the maze would be shutting any minute now.

“Look at that shuckface!” Gally suddenly shouted, pointing at Thomas and I didn’t understand where this anger was coming from. “He’s nothing but a piece of klunk!”

“That’s enough, Gally.” Newt defended as we entered the group.

Alby unfolded his arms and settled them beside him, he walked over to us and Thomas gulped at the proximity. He cleared his throat due to his nervousness and shifted on his feet, but never took his hand out of mine. The leader’s eyes flickered to it before they returned to their angry post on the Greenie, disappointment also evident in them.

“We don’t have many rules here in the glade.” Alby spoke up. “And yet, Thomas, you have managed to break the most important.”

I expected my boyfriend’s head to fall to the ground in shame, but instead he stood his ground. Thomas was in no way challenging or disrespecting Alby, he was just telling him through his actions that he didn’t agree.

“You’re going to have to be punished for going against our law.”

“Banish him!” Gally yelled and my entire body went weak.

“Alby, we can’t banish him.” Minho suddenly intervened, his eyes concerned about his good friend. “He’s too important.”

“Maybe we should just put him a night in the pit with no food.” Newt offered and the scoff that came out of Gally’s mouth was so loud it almost scared me.

“Absolutely not!” The annoying glader disagreed, his head shaking as he pointed at Thomas. “That’s too easy, he’s just gonna do it again!”

“So?” I spoke up, surprising both the gladers and myself. “I’m the one that decides wether or not someone touches me, not you guys!”

“(Y/N), you don’t know what you’re saying-”

“Yes, I do Gally!” I shouted in frustration. “Thomas isn’t hurting me and it shouldn’t be a crime if I like it.”

“She has a point, Alby.” Minho agreed with me and an actual smile placed itself on my lips.

“No, she doesn’t!” Gally hissed. “Alby, don’t listen to this. He can’t just spend a night in the pit, he needs to be kicked out.”

Alby lifted his hand to order silence in the glade and everyone immediately complied. A nervous lump formed in my throat as I realized that the leader had made his decision.

“Thomas, you won’t be spending a night in the pit.” Alby stated. “You’ll spending it in the maze.”

The entire world around me stopped so I could feel it quickly crumble into pieces beneath my feet. A static noise buzzed in my ear and my eyes became blurry with instant tears as I felt an icy cold hurricane crash down on me and drown me in fear. My heart pounded against my body as if it belonged to Thumper from Bambi and I was certain it was going to break through and fall down to the floor.

“No, no, no.” I shook my head in denial but no one said anything. It was already decided.

Out of nowhere, the sudden sound of the doors to the maze began to close and the ice water inside of me froze every single one of my limbs. Pain invaded my cells and tore them apart without any bit of mercy. The last thing I heard before I completely succumbed to my fear was Alby’s upset voice telling Thomas it was time to go. My breathing shortened and a sick feeling punched me in my stomach, warning me I was going to throw up. An invisible hand wrapped around my throat and forbid me from properly breathing and a mixture of hot and cold flashes sparked through my body. It was as if I were dying and I knew exactly what was happening to me. And by the way Thomas stood in front of me and placed both of his hands on my cheek, he also knew I was having a panic attack.

“Breathe.” He instructed and I tried to follow the way he was showing me breathing exercises. “It’s okay, just breathe. I’m going to make it, (Y/N). I need you to believe me.”

I wanted to say I believed him but all I could do was replay Chuck once telling me No one survives a night in the maze over and over again in my mind. Thomas continued to try and comfort me even though he was the one about to face the Grievers, yet we both knew my panic attack wasn’t going to go away anytime soon.

“Thomas, let’s go.” Alby stated, pulling his hands off of me and began leading everyone towards the moving doors.

We approached it and I did my best to ignore my panic attack as Thomas turned to look at me one last time. His eyes were begging me to be okay and I wished I could grant him what he wanted, but I wasn’t going to ever be okay again. My boyfriend quickly wrapped his arms around me and I ignored all of the stares from the gladers as he separated to place a kiss on my lips. It was short and of course I craved more, but mainly because a part of me knew I would never feel it again.

“I love you.” Thomas said to me for the first time and my heart actually jumped. My eyes flickered over to Alby for the slightest second and I could see the hurt in his own eyes. He didn’t want to do this, but he needed to enforce the rules.

My boyfriend walked through the doors to the maze and my legs ran to him, hot tears streaming down my face that I hadn’t even noticed until now. Newt immediately grabbed me before I could go in and I watched with a heart in agony as he entered the maze and turned around to look as me one last time.

“I love you, too.” I shouted through my hysterical sobbing.

Thomas gave me an encouraging smile before the rocks connected and he was trapped behind closed doors.


The entire night was one long and drawn out nightmare. My mind kept picturing the worst scenarios of Thomas in that terrifying maze, always ending with him being teared apart by the Grievers that showed him no mercy. His pillow was completely stained by my salty tears at this point and my cheeks were stiff with all of the dry water stuck to them. I was no longer sobbing uncontrollably like I had since the moment Thomas left, but I was now entirely numb inside.

Usually, I loved getting up early in the morning to see Thomas quickly before we had to run off into the maze for the day. However, today I dreaded the idea of leaving his hammock that I have already claimed my own. His smell still lingered in the sheets and I, in no way, was ready to part from the small piece of him I still had left. No one ever survives a night in the maze and Thomas is still relatively a Greenie which means he was no different.

Watching as the sun rose in front of me, the normally beautiful and vibrant colors no longer having an effect without Thomas here for us to marvel at them, I felt a small finger tapping on my shoulder. Turning around, Chuck looked at me with pity but also a small glimpse of hope in his eyes. He was laying on his hammock and I instantly noticed the dried tears on his freckled cheeks.

“He’s gonna make it.” He spoke up, his voice not groggy like I expected it to be which meant he also didn’t get any sleep last night. Our minds were too worried about our favorite person in this glade. “I promise you. Thomas is gonna walk right through those doors today and surprise us all.”

“Don’t get your hopes up, Chuck.” I stated, the lump in my throat now permanently lodged there. “It hurts more than just accepting the horrible truth.”

“This is the truth.” The chubby twelve year old sat up in his hammock, his eyes determined as they looked at me. “I’ve been in this glade as long as I can remember and never have I ever met someone like Thomas before. He’s strong, fast and– most importantly– he’s ridiculously smart. If someone’s gonna figure out a way to survive against the Grievers, that someone is definitely our Thomas.”

His words weren’t just made to comfort me and they weren’t full of pity or false hope, Chuck meant every single sentence that came out of his mouth. And from how certain he was about them, I couldn’t help hut feel like they were laced with truancy. I know Thomas better than anyone here and because of that, I was well aware he would never give up without one hell of a fight. My logic and my mind were telling me he was already long gone, but my heart suddenly felt a small spark of faith. All thanks to how sure this small yet incredibly courageous boy was.

“Thank you, Chuck.” I smiled for the first time since yesterday. “I needed to hear that.”

“And I needed to say it to someone​ other than myself.” He confessed with a kind smile that I gladly returned. “Now come on, let’s get some breakfast.”

Chuck shot up from his hammock and I let out a loud squeal when he turned mine, suddenly dropping me on the ground. The grass prickled my arms and legs, but I was now too focused on immediately standing up to get my revenge on him. The youngest glader let out a mixture of a scream and a laugh when I charged for him, already running away from me. But, I was determined and Chuck knew that which is why in a matter of seconds as we ran through the glade, not caring who saw us, I was able to wrap my arms around him and grab the kid. Instantly pinning him to the ground, Chuck shouted and giggled as I mercilessly attacked him with the tickle monster.

“Stop, please!” He pleaded through his loud laughter, the gladers waking up because of us. “Okay, okay! You win!”

“As always.” I smirked, pulling away from him. Chuck immediately let out a deep breath of relief and rested his elbows on the grass to glare at me.

“You’re an evil, woman.” He challenged and all I could do was laugh.

“I like to think of it as a gift.”

Winking at Chuck and then walking away, the sudden loud sound of the solid doors to the maze roared through the glade and warned us they were now opening. My heart instantly stopped and I didn’t even notice I was sprinting towards the heavy doors until I felt unexpected wind stinging against my cheek. I could see the maze already and my heartbeat paced faster than it ever has, not because I was running but because I was convinced that Thomas would be on the other side.

From my peripheral vision, I sensed Minho and Newt running along with me and Chuck right behind us three. We didn’t care that we looked desperate and insane, all we wanted was to see our Greenie again. I internally cursed my legs for not being fast enough and getting me to Thomas as soon as possible.

Once I had finally reached the entrance of the maze, my legs halted to a stop and my eyes immediately peered around the inside to see if they could spot him. I didn’t even mind that my breathing was completely unstable, that my heartbeat was pounding against my eardrums or that my lungs were burning in my chest. All I could think about was: Where the hell is he?

Thomas was nowhere in sight. The maze was completely empty and as I felt Chuck reach up and stand beside me, my mind began to slip back into the state it was in before. The panic and despair came back along with the pain and agony in my heart. All of the hope and faith Chuck had convinced me of instantly washed away only to be replaced by anguish and anger. The hurt I felt watching Thomas enter the maze is nothing compared to the wound that I will now have because he hasn’t come out of it. The once numb girl was now completely broken and shattered into a million pieces.

How could I have let myself think that things would’ve ended any differently?

Everyone knows people don’t make it with Grievers surrounding them, no human has a chance against those monsters. Thomas, the love of my life, was gone and there’s nothing I could do to get him back. He’s dead… and it’s all my fault. Why did I get involved with him when I knew it would put his life in danger? Why did I repeatedly be with him even though I was well aware of the possible consequences?

All I cared about was momentary passion and now Thomas has suffered a permanent punishment because of it- because of me. I’ll never forgive myself for what I have caused and I’ll never be able to live with the guilt either. Although, I won’t ever forget all of the fun times we had with each other and the love we shared. I don’t care that I can’t remember anything that happened to me before the glade, what really matter are the memories Thomas and I created together.

“So much for walking through those doors and surprising us.” I stated to Chuck as my voice broke, not even bothering to look at him.

I didn’t care how possibly hurt he was now, all I managed to do was look at the vacant maze one last time before tearing myself away from it and heading towards anywhere but here.

My legs carried me to the woods once again to cry alone and away from everyone else just like I had yesterday. But, this time it was so much worse. I couldn’t even see properly with how blurry my vision has become thanks to the non-stop tears. The back of my eyes burned as they cried, but it didn’t compare to the burning in my heart. It carried a weight like no other, a pain like never before. Leaning against a tree and slumping down to the uncomfortable ground, I allowed myself to just completely lose it.

Suddenly, the sound of a twig snapping pulled me out of my own depressing thoughts to look up at the source. Rage and hatrid flowed through my body the second I wiped away the pooling tears in my eyes and came face-to-face with the one person I despise the most, Gally. He stood there in front of me with a disgusting grin planted on his face and I desperately wanted to slap it off.

“What the hell do you want, shuckface?” I hissed, forcing myself to stop crying so he wouldn’t see me so vulnerable and, to my surprise, it actually worked. Mind over matter, I guess.


The word came out of his mouth so naturally that I almost didn’t believe it, it wasn’t until he unexpectedly rushed over to me and lifted me off the ground that the reality hit me. Shockwaves of panic and fear immediately spread throughout my nerves like fire, instantly destroying me in its wake. A terrified and pained grunt escaped my lips when my attacker, all of a sudden, roughly pushed me up against the harsh tree. My body was so shocked with what was happening that I couldn’t even respond, my muscles frozen in place although my mind was screaming desperately at me to fight and run away.

“G-Gally!” I cried, my lips the only part of my body able to react as he gripped both of my wrists with one of his hands and settled it over my head. “Stop! What are you doing?!”

“What do you think I’m doing?” He spat back with a smirk and flashes of horror consumed me.

“You can’t do this!” I shouted frantically, my voice desperate and unstable.

“Why not?” Gally’s black and dark eyes pierced into mine, his icy stare making me feel cold. “Thomas did.”

The mention of his name sparked something in me I couldn’t explain and I, suddenly, felt stronger than ever. My body finally responded​ to the commands my neurons were sending to my muscles. Immediately and harshly stepping down on his foot, Gally let out a yelp of pain and out of instinct, let go of my hand.

“I wanted Thomas to touch me! You’re just disgusting!” I shouted at him with intense fury before sprinting away from the psycho.

“Oh, no you don’t.” I heard him comment and I knew that he was already hot on my trail.

Before I even expected it, I was abruptly tackled to the ground by his forceful body and to say it hurt wouldn’t be a fair description. Adrenaline ran through my veins, but it didn’t matter how much I fought back because Gally was a lot stronger than me. As soon as I tried to scream for help, his hand instantly covered my mouth and stopped me from trying to escape. His other hand grabbed my wrists like before and there was no use in trying to get away anymore, I was completely submitted to Gally’s strength.

I’m disgusting? You’re the whore, not me.” He hissed, tears already returning their posts down my cheeks. “I’m one of the leaders here and my voice is heard, not yours. If you say anything about this, (Y/N), no one’s ever gonna believe you.”

“I will.”

A sudden and familiar voice that didn’t belong to neither me or Gally spoke up from behind us and I immediately recognized it. My attacker’s eyes widened in fear, meaning he also knew exactly whom it belonged to and relief spread through my once terrified nerves when he quickly stood up.

There, standing over us, was the one person I desperately wanted to see the most. His shirt was torn, his shoulder covered in yellow slime, all of his skin painted with dirt, blood and sweat- but he never looked more beautiful in his entire life.

Not being able to handle waiting, my legs jumped up and instantly ran towards Thomas. His arms already welcoming me as I crashed into his embrace. I couldn’t care less about Gally anymore, all that mattered was that Thomas was alive and well. I hugged him so tight because I was afraid he would disappear if I let go, but instead of wincing my boyfriend just hugged me as tight right back. My tears of joy stained his shirt even further, Thomas caressing my hair whilst I cried into his chest.

“Baby, what do you want me to do with Gally?” He asked, the sound of his voice music to my ears.

“I don’t care.” I shrugged. “I just want to hold you forever now that you’re back.”

I didn’t know how it was possible, but Thomas hugged me even tighter and I loved every second of it.

“I’m too tired to kill you, Gally. Just get out of my sight.” He warned, his voice stern. “Go now before I change my mind!”

I tuned out the sound of Gally’s feet crushing grass and twigs as he ran away from us, my mind only focused on the steady pace of Thomas’ beating heart in his chest. He placed kisses on my temple continously and it didn’t help to stop the salty tears streaming down my cheeks.

“I thought I lost you.” I cried.

“Well, I promised you wouldn’t.” He chuckled, his body shaking the both of us as he did. “And I’m not one to break a promise.”

“I’m just glad you’re home with me.”

“(Y/N),” Thomas pulled away so he could stare me deep into my eyes. “You are my home.”

CP bachelor AU: part 13

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12


Laurent bends his legs, pulling his ankles out of direct sunlight and back into the shade of the poolside umbrella. He’s had sunburned feet once in his life, and never plans to repeat it. He throws an annoyed glance at Damen, who is stretched out on the adjacent lounge chair. Damen has spent the last three days turning steadily browner while being very lax about sunscreen.

The villa they’ve rented on the west coast of Santorini has its own pool as well as its own tiny courtyard complete with mosaic floor and fountain. Sunshine off white stone and white paint makes it feel overbright and otherworldly during the day, shimmering with heat and light. Laurent tried for an hour this morning to go over his notes on the Theran eruption and the formation of the caldera, but the heat snuck into his brain, and he can’t make himself mind. He feels looser, and happier, than he ever imagined he could.

The ratings for the show’s finale were unprecedented. With the story of Erasmus and Kallias under their belts, the finale was marketed as an even more shocking twist, and Laurent and Damen have become the new faces of unexpected romance. They’ve been asked to present at the Logies, and to appear on every morning show in the country.

Laurent has never been a celebrity in his own right, nor wanted to. He’s… adjusting.

The most obvious benefit is that Damen’s stock in the eyes of his PR department has shot way, way up, and his father has–after a long talk with both Damen and Laurent, which left Laurent feeling like he’d run a marathon–agreed that Damen will assume control of the company as planned. Theomedes looked like a man who’d already planned the first three years of his luxury retirement and had one impatient foot out the door; he was ready to throw Damen the reins immediately.

Damen promptly turned around and declared that he was leaving the company in the care of his brother Kastor for six months, extending the leave of absence he’d taken to come on the show.

“To do what?” Theomedes demanded.

“This and that,” said Damen, eyes dancing at Laurent. “Expand my horizons. Travel.”

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anonymous asked:

Best marauders fics? ??

oh hoooo boy (most of these are gonna be ffn bc i was and still am SUPER DUPER into marauders fics before ao3 was a major thing.) (also, i love AUs) (also i p much only ready jily. i do ship wolfstar! but i havent actively gone and read any wolfstar fics) (also these are all p much from 2013-2015) but off the top of my head (under the cut bc this got LONG):

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 And just like that, your fate was sealed - because Min Yoongi was absolutely going to destroy you. But hell, if you weren’t going to let him, or bask happily in the flames as he did so.

And sadly, at the time, you didn’t think that your thoughts would become so literal.

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader
Word Count: 12,039 yikes!
Chapter Index
◇ Soulmate!Au, Slowburn, Angst

Over the short magnitude of time that Min Yoongi has been a part of your ever moving life – his decision or not, you have come to discover one thing about his complex character, and that is: when you think you have him figured out, he does something to throw your entire thought base off balance and send it spiraling into the depths of somewhere unknown.

This is what happens the following Monday when he ventures into your shared English Literature class.

Now, when you had told Jungkook to pass along your reply to Yoongi, you weren’t sure he had received it. Because you had yet to acquire a text message from him. That’s right, not a letter, word, sentence, or paragraph had you received. In fact, you were starting to wonder if Yoongi had indeed changed his mind regarding the friendship or not.

To be honest, it wouldn’t surprise you.

Because, after all, trying to guess when it came to Min Yoongi was trying to guess the weather. There was a fifteen percent chance that the New’s was correct and a seventy five percent chance that something irrational could happen and everything would change.

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  • Blake: ... *Blake sat in her comfy chair reading one of her favorite books with in the house she, her girlfriend Yang, and the rest of team RWBY shared and has a random thought.* I wonder if I should get one of those virgin killer sweaters to tease Yang with?... Wait Why the hell would I even think that?
  • Yang: *Suddenly the door burst open revealing Yang ironically wearing said sweater hiding something moving with in it before with a teasing smile said to her girlfriend.* Blake. I'm pregnant. You're the father.
  • Blake: Ah, it was an omen. *Blake thought to herself before going back to her book.* Yang. Picking up a stray cat does not make them our baby. Now go take them to the animal shelter so they can get a good house.
  • Yang: Aw but Blakey. She is so cute. Look. *Yang then reach inside of her backless sweater and processed to turn it around revealing before the black cat with blonde stripes and her breast to which made Blake's face instantly blush as a warm feeling rose between her legs.* See, She is adorable. Can we keep her? Please?
  • Blake: I...duh... uh... *Is all Blake could say as she stared at Yang wanting nothing more then to pounce on her. Unfortunately for her self control she then watched as the began to make itself comfy between her girlfriend's chest pillows causing her to slam her book shut, throw it on the table as she stand up, march over to her girlfriend, Snatch the cat from Yang, placing it on the ground, and before Yang could speak Tackle her onto the couch.*
  • Yang: Whoa! Blake? What are you-Hmmmph!~<3 *Yang trying to question before holding back a moan as Blake nuzzled her breats, her cat ears tickling her.*
  • Blake: Fine. We can keep the cat if Ruby and Weiss are okay with it. However, She stays off my favorite cuddle pillow. Deal. *Blake said as she stared up at Yang growing lustfully face as she teased her.*
  • Yang: ~Deeeeal.~<3 Butt first, *Yang panted with a smirk and she reached down Blake's back, slipping her hand underneath her pants and undies causing her girlfriend to yip in surprise.* Lets go up to our room with you can cuddle and I play my belladongos.<3
  • Blake: Oh yes please. *Blake smiled giving Yang a kiss and laughed as Yang lifted her up and carried her up to their room as the cat watch and then fall a sleep on the couch.
  • ~Later~
  • Weiss: *Weiss sat at the stand of counter reading her scroll sipping her coffee when she had a random thought.* I wonder if they have those sweaters with the opening in the chest in my size... Wait Why the hell would I even want one of those lewd things!?
  • Ruby: *Suddenly the door burst open revealing Ruby ironically wearing said sweater hiding something moving with in it before with a teasing smile said to her girlfriend.* Weiss. I'm pregnant and you are the father.
  • Weiss: What are the odds? And why does my girlfriend have to be bigger then me in the two areas I wish I was? *Weiss thought to herself.* Ruby. Aside from the fact that we can't have kids through normal sex. What is in your shirt?
  • Ruby: *Then right on cue, Zwei's head popped out of the opening of Ruby's sweater as Ruby grinned.* Our son!~<3
  • Weiss: ... *Weiss then set her scroll and mug down, stand up, walk over to her girlfriend and there dog, and processed to cuddle them both.* And what an adorable son and mommy you two are.~<3 Oh yes you both are.~<3
  • Ruby: Hehehehe Love you too Weiss. *Ruby smiled as she cuddled back.*


For the first time since Oscar had made the huntsman’s acquaintance, Qrow Branwen flinched as he helped the boy up the stairs to where their rooms. “Okay, maybe training today went a little too far.”

Oscar shot the man a dry glare. “A little?”

Qrow sighed. “Alright, alright. We’ve got some got some antiseptic and other stuff to help with that knee of yours back in the room. Apparently, those kids went restocked those supplies when they got here while I was still being treated.”

The farm boy’s look turned from dry to incredulous at that. “I still can’t believe that the first thing you did after almost dying from scorpion venom was head out to a bar. Seriously, you have a major death wish.”

The drunk smirked. “What, you figured that out just from that?”

“That and the few memories Ozpin has let me see of when you were student. I specifically remember the time I….Ozpin banned you from even leaving campus after Summer…." 

Before he could continue that sentence however, Qrow suddenly jerked to a stop. Before Oscar could tell the drunk off for stopping with no warning, he got a look at Qrow’s expression. The drunken death glares from earlier seemed to pale by comparison, but in a way….it was a lot more vulnerable for the older man. As if it wasn’t certain whether he would retaliate or break if Oscar pressed further.

The young man sighed. "You can glare at me all you want, but that doesn’t change the truth.”

For a moment, Qrow stood perfectly still before he sighed, getting the two moving again towards their room. “Fair enough.”

The two were quiet for a little bit, hobbling along before Qrow broke the silence. “So, you remember that.”

“To an extent. I don’t have every memory of Ozpin’s though part of the reason for that is that he’s actively suppressing some memories from me. Half the time, I feel annoyed with him keeping secrets and the other half I wonder whether that might be a good thing. I mean, some of the memories  I’ve seen aren’t the most…..happy…”

The headmaster’s voice chimed in his head. And I am grateful for that understanding.

Oscar sighed as he addressed the man in his head, still aware of his bad knee at the moment. ‘Not right now.’

The young man then turned to Qrow, the man’s expression fully understanding of what the young man was saying. Then the bird man went on. “From what you said earlier, you can also pick up on Ozpin’s emotions towards something or someone.”

“Yeah, that I can fully feel in the moment. And sometimes those emotions kind of bleed into me, but I have a lot more control over that.”

“Alright, mind I ask something then? I could never get a straight answer out of Ozpin while he was alive.”

Oscar felt an eyebrow lift at him as they finally found themselves in front of the door to their room. “Depends on the question, why bring this up now?”

Qrow took out their key card from his pocket and opened the door. “Well, that memory is when I first noticed something was up, but I never really pressed the issue. Still, I can’t forget what I saw back then and it’s kind of bugged me for years.”

Oscar entered their room with Qrow supporting him as he asked. “What is it then?”

“Exactly, what was the relationship between him and…..?”

But before Qrow could finish his thought, the two were greeted with the sight of ruby curled up with her infamous red cloak up on one of the beds, fast asleep (actually, the sight was one of the fantasies that Oscar had had, but arguably more innocent than what his teenage hormones had dreamed up).

Qrow seemed rather surprised by the sight before a smile came and he let out a small sigh. “Waiting up for us….huh, not sure how to feel about that…”

Then the man turned to Oscar with a stern stare, his volume low. “I’ll go get the stuff from the restroom, take a seat on the OTHER BED. And keep it down.”

Qrow then turned towards their shared bathroom.

Oscar glared at the man behind his back, but didn’t head to sit down. As painful as his knee was feeling right now, he didn’t want to sit down. Instead, he made his way directly in front of where Ruby was sleeping. The young woman looked so peaceful it was hard to believe she was such a skilled creature killer. A smile came to his face, his hand reaching out to gently stroke her hair. A hum started at the back of his throat as he did so, a lovely melody that he could not remember where he heard it from.

Then his vision flashed.

The scenery is different in that it's the Beacon infirmary, he is sitting down this time with his cane in one hand. The other is stroking her hair. But….this isn’t Ruby though the faces are pretty much identical. He feels white instead of red from this person. The melody is the same though….and he feels this mixture of regret and a longing to reach out further….

Then it changes again, this time it’s dark out and there is a beautiful view of the moon and the stars. But….he’s not the one comforting, he’s being comforted. He is shaking as someone larger holds him close, stroking his hair. That person is humming the song, gently rocking him as he drifts off to sleep. He feels safe….as much as he doesn’t want this person to see him like this, he needs this…..craves this….

It fades too quickly for Oscar, practically gasping for breath as the inn’s room is back. He shakes his head, seeing Ruby still sleeping grounds the moment for him. Then the pain in his knee comes back sharper than ever and he finally goes over to the other bed. He takes a few deep breaths as he goes down.

Finally, Ozpin speaks. Well, I should have expected this sooner.

That gains the young man’s attention quickly. 'What do you mean? What was that?’

The man in his head pauses before he goes. ….certain situations can bring up memories of our past if they resemble them enough. Or mirror it. I guess you could say it’s like Deja Vu, though more potent.

'Both of those memories were yours. The first was when you were an adult, the second was when you were a child.’

Ozpin said nothing, which in itself said quite a bit.

'That girl….that was Ruby’s mom Summer, right? What was that all about? And that other memory….who was….?’

Before the wizard could be probed further by his successor, Qrow came back in with a small medical kit with a disgruntled expression. “Jeez, they had to store it in a place that wasn’t easy to see. Probably Valkyrie’s idea….”

The shape shifter then seemed to notice Oscar’s expression. “What’s up?”

Oscar rubs his forehead as he leans forward. “What do you think?”

Qrow takes the answer as he goes over to Oscar with he first aid materials. “Alright, well try not to flinch too badly. I wasn’t the best at first aid, but I’m more than decent.”

Oscar rolls up one of his pant’s leg, exposing how bad his knee really was. The antiseptic hurt, but with the puzzle pieces he has, he was just left feeling confused. Ozpin had secrets and any normal person had the right to some sense of privacy. But this wasn’t a normal situation and Oscar was connected to whatever Ozpin felt. And he couldn’t help but get the feeling that there was something important to those scenes, something that connected the three moments together.

“Ozpin saying something?”

That brought Oscar back as he noticed that Qrow was done tending to him with his knee bandaged up(and it felt pretty good).

He shook his head. “No, I’m just thinking of something. It’s making him pretty quiet.”

Qrow considered that before nodded. “Yeah, that would happen whenever things got too personal. Never really liked to talk about himself though. Well, we’ll be taking it easy with your training for a few days. Guess this means I can go all out on blondie…”

Oscar’s tone turned stern. “Please don’t take out your frustrations with the situation and your brother in law on Jaune. Guy’s got enough to deal with….”

“Well, if Ozpin thought he was future Huntsman potential, then I have every right to push him towards it. Though I’m still not seeing it….”

With that said, the huntsman stood up with the first aid kit still on the bed. He then stood in front of where Ruby was sleeping, the girl still out like a light. “Honestly, when it comes to patience she’s nothing like Summer….always charging right into the think of it….”

Qrow smiled down at her and the expression was enough to make Oscar feel like he was intruding on something private. It was so clear how much this man loved Ruby, how far he’d go for her sake. Like there was nothing more beautiful and precious to him than this red cloaked young woman and he would face hell for her if need be.

And yet, the twitching of his hand….

“Are you that afraid to touch her?”

The bird man turned around to Oscar sharply, his glare burning for several moments before he answered. “You have no idea what you’re talking about kid.”

“Ozpin told me all about your semblance Qrow. You try your best to put some space between the two of you whenever you’re together. And whenever there’s physical contact, Ruby is the one who initiates it. It doesn’t seem like anything bad has happened out of it yet.”

Qrow’s red eyes took a dark glint at that. “Exactly…not yet.”

Oscar felt a flash of irritation with the man, from both himself and Ozpin. “I’m pretty sure your semblance is not responsible for everything that happens to you. And I’m also sure that those who care about you would tell you the same thing.”

The man scoffed. “You sound just like Oz….”

“You’re the one who’s acting like Ozpin.”

Qrow gave a wry smile at that. “What, because we spout cryptic bullshit and put our responsibilities on others?”

“No, in the way you distance yourselves. In how you both fear….and crave intimacy.”

That seemed to strike a nerve in the corvid as his eyes flashed. He stepped away from the bed, the young woman still sleeping, and headed for the door. “I’m going for a drink.”

The young man resisted the urge to snarkily comment as the door shut behind the somewhat functioning alcoholic.

And that was the sound that finally got Ruby to stir. Oscar winced as he got up, but went to her side nonetheless. He smiled at her. “Hey.”

Ruby’s silver eyes blinked a few times before she smiled at seeing him. “Hey yourself.”

Then she noticed the bandages around his knee, her eyes shining with concern. “What happened?”

“Training, Qrow said I should take it easy for a couple of days. He went out to get a drink.”

Ruby’s face a fell a bit at that, obviously wanting to spend some time with Qrow. “I see.”

Oscar sat down right next to her, wincing a bit as Ruby supported him before he got his smile back up. “Well, do you just want to talk? Honestly, I could use something to take my mind off of this.”

Ruby smiled, letting go of him. “Sure.”

The farm boy smiled before sliding his hand into hers, getting some genuine surprise from such a move. Any other time, he might have been nervous, but right now he just wanted some form of contact with her.

And judging from her expression, it wasn’t unwelcome.

He could feel Ozpin’s slight disapproval, but also understanding.

Oscar asked her then, the two of them comfortable where they were. “So, how was you guys’ day?”

So, this might be seen as a sort of sequel to my last one Bedside Manner, though I think this might have been longer.

Might be a while before I post stuff again. Just kind of hitting some writer’s block.

To celebrate, I wanted to create an Influence Map! As my style is still shakily making its way along, I thought it’d be fun to show those that I look up to! 
10 Artists in no particular order! (The names are the links to their blogs)


These artists are just so amazing, they each have such unique, beautiful styles. I take inspiration for details, thicc bodies, colours, lighting, just ideas in general to help me along my own way. I could say so much more but their work speaks for itself, so go check each out if any of these crops pull you in~

Bonus 11. SQUELCHSQUELCH : It IS an influence map and Dicky is such a Huge Influence on my art. Putting aside what a wonderful friend she is, her fics smashed through a really bad artblock I was having - as can be seen from that first piece for her, how rusty and flubby I was - and have set off this steady beautiful fresh stream of inspiration. Please go check out her fics (she writes mchanzo), her writing style is D E L I C I O U S and feel free to tell her how talented and lovely she is while you’re there!~

Married to a Monster - Fifteen [M]

Originally posted by icallhimbangjamesbang

Paring: kaiXreader, minseokXreader

Word Count: 5.5k

Genre: Angst&Fluff&Smut || husband!Jongin, best friend!Jongdae, best friend!Minseok

Summary: Being forced into a marriage with your first love/childhood best friend is messy - especially when he was the sole reason you attempted to kill yourself and the reason your body is riddled with scars. Old wounds were opened but you pushed yourself to figure things out, if not for yourself, then for your deceased sister whose death seemed to keep haunting you and Jongin.

Notes: This series will contain talk of suicide, self-harm, abuse, death and possibly more. Smut will be rated [M]. This chapter contains slight smut

One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven | Twelve | Thirteen | Fourteen | Fifteen

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goodbye ✧ mingyu

1.5k words, fluff + mostly angst
@jongjongdaein​ submitted: ❝mingyu from seventeen, fluff turned angst?❞

of course dating an idol was a roller coaster of emotions. you were always kept on your toes with mingyu, caring for him, treasuring your little time with him, and supporting his music whenever you were able to. at times it could get tiring, but you were always smiling with him, watching him live his dream and being able to be apart of it.

still, it was hard, and for some reason you were constantly feeling like a burden to him. having to manage his job, on top of always worrying about your well-being? it wasn’t fair to him. and you hated making him feel like it was his duty.

admittedly, it was his caring nature that had attracted you to him in the first place. working at a concert hall definitely had a lot of different perks, one of those being fainting right before seventeen would be going onto stage because you were running on two hours of sleep and an empty stomach. it turned out to be a blessing, though, because a certain concerned boy group member who you had incidentally fainted onto had held you up and offered his bottle of water to you, worriedly asking other staff members is she gonna be alright? and do you need me to help?

you had somehow ended up with his manager’s number that night, and after sending a card and a box of sticky rice cakes a few days later to his dorm as a token of your appreciation, he had invited you out (he’ll never tell you it was because he liked you - when you’d asked he had denied, insisting it was the right thing to do.) 

and ever since then you had been together, trying to meet whenever one of you had free time. you considered meeting mingyu that night as a miracle, a blessing of sorts.

sundays like today were hard to come across. in fact, they were the rarest of all - a whole day, together, to do absolutely nothing? it was perfect. his promotions had just ended a few weeks ago and his manager had kindly allowed the boys a period of free time before they were to head back into the studio. 

of course, mingyu had thought, what better than to spend it with you?

so there you were, curled into mingyu’s side comfortably with a fleecy blue blanket spread over the two of you. it was late in the afternoon, 2pm, maybe - but you had spent the whole day in each other’s embrace.

moments like this were the ones that you treasured the most -  when neither of you were dressed up, just being content with being in the other’s presence. it was nice, relaxing - and it made you feel at ease.

even nicer, though - because you knew that mingyu had been stressed out about the comeback ever since the beginnings of promotions. feedback from others and critics made him nervous, upset, hurt - and yet, along with all of it, he felt the need to continuously worry for you. so a break, like this, was much needed.

mingyu tugs you closer to him by your waist, his free hand scrolling through his twitter. you rest your head on his shoulder, listening to his laughs as his thumb taps at the screen.

his hand absentmindedly begins to draw abstract patterns onto your hips. it’s a small gesture, but it makes you feel even more pleased. his lips kiss your temples sweetly, and he whispers soothingly, “i love you, baby.”

then you’re reminded of what’s been on your mind for days, maybe weeks now. this whole time you’d been waiting for an opportunity to get it off your chest, so that maybe you could have some mental relief - but now that the chance had been presented to you right under your nose, why couldn’t you tell him?

you stop yourself from replying with “i love you too.” your heartbeat quickens furiously, as if urging you to speak. conflict paints itself over your face and thoughts flash into your mind like lightning - should i say it? is it the right time? how should i say this? what if this moment never comes again?

but your mouth opens before you have any more time to process the words that slide off of your tongue.

“mingyu… can we talk?”

instantly his eyes detach from his phone screen and he seems concerned, but not worried. not prepared for what you’re going to say.

your heart aches as he sits up properly, hand still tightly slung around your waist. “yeah, what’s up?” he asks.

you examine his face ever so intricately. you must say, he really is synonymous with delicate - all of his features are so endearing and enticing that you can’t help but let your stare linger for a little while.

inwardly you instruct yourself to concentrate on the task at hand. you search for the right words, though nothing about this really seems right at all.

“i… i need to tell you something.”

it’s an unpleasant phrase to allow out of your mouth. in fact, all it does is release tension and suspense into the atmosphere, and you know mingyu’s heart has most likely dropped into his stomach by now even though you haven’t announced anything.

“yeah?” he repeats, and for a moment you think you think you hear him stutter out his words.

you shift in his grasp, fidgeting with your thumbs and knuckles instead of looking at him. you find it impossible to make eye contact with someone who you would usually call your best friend. “i, uh… it’s just, something that’s been on my mind…”

“is everything okay?” his voice sounds anxious, anticipating your next words carefully.

“well,” you say, shakily taking a glance up at him. you hum in intense thought, “it’s… it’s about… us.”

you hear mingyu’s audible gulp. remaining silent, he awaits your explanation. the hand on your hip doesn’t move.

“i…” you begin, but your throat betrays you, slicing your sentence short as it tightens with fear. hot tears begin to brew behind your eyelids, but you don’t allow them to fall. “so… i know you’re working a lot right now, even though your promotions are finished but you have to produce your new song, and it’s just that, i-”

there are too many options that battle on the tip of your tongue. it’s not you, it’s me must be too cliche. i’m sorry… too dramatic. we should break up– no way, too straightforward.

the look on mingyu’s face causes your heart to shatter. you need to tell him, you can’t make him wait any longer, and so–

“i don’t want you to worry about me anymore.”

it’s vague, but you know he understands. and you know he doesn’t want to understand.

emotions visibly wash over his face, “w…what do you mean?”

you swallow thickly, feeling your vision grow hazy with tears. rapidly, you tear your gaze away from the confused boy sitting beside you, whispering, “mingyu, i…”

“no, tell me,” he says, leaning down in attempt to get a glimpse at your face. he brings his hand up to your chin, ever so lightly trying to turn you towards him - but when you flinch away from his touch, he knows

his voice then is nothing short of broken. “baby, please…”

by now the words that you speak are senseless and thoughtless. you can’t bring yourself to say anything more to him. “no, i just…” you murmur, “i think it’s better if we didn’t see each other.”

mingyu feels everything at once. confusion. hurt. anger. devastation. guilt. it’s too much and he stares at the ground, hoping, praying that maybe it’s all a dream, maybe he imagined it all, maybe…

but it isn’t a dream, and he hasn’t imagined it. and there you are, red-eyed, distraught, just as puzzled as him, tears rolling slowly down your cheeks beside him.

softly, his hand comes to the small of your back. this time you don’t move away from it, but abstain from leaning into his embrace. he coos, “baby, you don’t need to do this.”

you shake your head, sniffing, “it’s not fair to you. you deserve so much better-”

“but i don’t want anything better,” he hisses at you sternly, out of sheer frustration, “can’t you see that? i just want you. you, that’s it. i don’t care about music, or money, or anything, i don’t want anything else–”

his voice breaks, and you’re forced to fix your gaze onto him. it’s evident that he holds back tears of his own and the sight of him makes you want to kiss him, hug him, tell him how much you love him.

“please,” he begs.

how one cozy noon had developed into this monstrosity was absolutely beyond you. and you had never meant for it to happen like this, you had never meant for the two of you to turn out like such a wreck –

but what was done was done, and irreversible.

reluctantly, you open your mouth one last time.

“i’m sorry, mingyu.”

you and mingyu’s three year anniversary arrives. neither of you have deleted the calendar reminder on your phones.

mingyu gets a knock on his door in the morning, a day where he has no schedules.

he opens the door to the sound of a car driving off in the distance.

gazing down, mingyu sees one box of sticky rice cakes sitting on his welcome mat.

The Path Untraveled, Re-Visited

… i dunno, i was trying to press through writer’s block by just typing a lot and seeing if anything worked out & this happened…

Canon Characters: ADA Rafael Barba & Detective Dominick ‘Sonny’ Carisi Jr.
Non-Canon: Reader / You.

edited to add: a pseudo-part-two from Rafi’s perspective happened, too.

Originally posted by rafealbarba

“I swear, you’ve never met someone like him, you’ll just adore him-”

“Sonny, I’m not quite feeling myself,” so instead, you gripped hard onto his arm, pleaded with him to accept your modest attempt at escape; “maybe it’s the nerves- perhaps I should go get a drink…”

“Oh stop,” promptly, he tugged at your sleeves, straightening out the wrinkled velvet that had bunched at your elbows. “He’s a great guy,” he twirled your curls around a fingertip, smirked as he watched them fall into place, “I’ve been shadowing him, you’ll think he’s so interesting- How do I look?”

Oh, Sonny. Sweet, precious Sonny- your darling ‘boyfriend’ of only a few months. Instead of objecting at his sudden, apparent need to primp and prep your appearance, you lay a hand atop his cheek. He really was so handsome, so excited about life, and you- “Sonny, sweetheart, I think we may have something to discuss…”

Instead of indulging your suggestion, his eyes went wide, as he quite obviously went to staring over your head. “Doll, we’ll talk about whatever you want tonight, but now-” he took a deep breath, tried to subdue the boyish smirk pulling at the corners of his lips while fixing his (not-even-)crooked tie, “Well, he’s comin’ this way and-”

“Carisi!” You flinched as soon as the voice came from behind you, but dared not twist that way. “Carisi, when they said you brought a date, I thought they were lying to me.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Question: Are these, and are you, on Archive of Our Own anywhere by chance? That would be awesome, if not, *shrugs* they are still awesome. Prompt: Police Officer Bucky and Hot Mess Clint: "Can you describe the man that tried to stab you?" "Yeah. He was... not very friendly."

They are! All can be found over here. :D


[Sequel, of course, to this]

Bucky won’t lie, he’d been kinda hoping to hear from the hot drunk guy. Steve had got a phone call - in the morning, first thing - and for that Bucky’s inclined to like Sam, inclined to give him a chance not to break Stevie’s heart. Him, though? Nada. Another guy who’d sobered up and balked at the prospect of dating a cop. Whatever, he’s used to it, it barely even stings. 

So when Steve tells him that Sam’s called, that there’s some kinda disturbance, Bucky’s barely even thinking about Clint when they walk through the door of the bar. Seeing him sprawled against the wall with a dishtowel held to his arm is more of a kick in the teeth than he’d expected. 

“You’ve called the paramedics?” Steve is asking Sam, but Bucky goes straight to Clint, squats next to him and hovers worried fingers over the towel. 

“You okay?” 

“Oh, sure,” Clint says, and he gives a rueful kinda grin. “I’m used to it.” 

“Used to getting stabbed?” 

“Sure,” Clint says, and he lets out a laughing breath that suggests he’s been drinking again, and maybe Bucky is better off outta this after all. 

“Can you describe the girl who - “

“Stabbed me? Course. She was - not very friendly.” 

Bucky snorts under his breath quite without meaning to, and Clint’s eyes crinkle into an unrepentant grin. 

“I could tell you all about her over coffee, if you want,” he says, and Bucky’s eyes snap to his, a little incredulous. “Just you, me, a police sketch artist - pretty romantic, right?” 

“…You’re asking me out?” 

“For all intensive purposes, sure.” 

“Intents,” Bucky says, and clears his throat when Clint looks at him sidelong. “Intents and purposes, y’know, like loitering with - ?” 

“I got intent,” Clint says, and suddenly his eyes are dark, and he’s looking about ten times more sober, and a line of heat traces itself down Bucky’s spine. “I’ve got so much intent when it comes to you, you have no idea.” 

“Yeah,” Bucky drawled, flipping a page in his notebook like that would make him look nonchalant, “I could tell that from how hard you tried to contact me.” 

“Would you believe Tasha was trying to protect our secret identities?” Clint watched his face, blew out a breath and continued before Bucky could speak. “Yeah, I thought not. No one ever goes for that. She’s - protective?” 

“I’m a cop,” Bucky says. “I get that the press ain’t exactly kind, but that’s not character reference enough for you?” 

“I’m not exactly known for making great decisions,” Clint says, and shrugs his arm a little like gettin’ stabbed is some kinda proof. 

“I’m a fantastic decision,” Bucky says. “Wanna make it with me?” 

It’s worth it, the awfulness of the line, for the way a laugh looks in the lines of Clint’s face. 

valentine's day wincest and j2 playlist!

ten songs about wincest (or J2) that make me cry, so you should listen to them (and cry with me) !

If It’s the Beaches// The Avett Brothers - This song reminds me so much of pre Stanford. Like, Dean is watching Sam pack up his things, talking of what college will be like, and it’s breaking his heart and he wants to make Sam happy. Anything to make him stay.

If I’m to Die// Keaton Henson - This song is purely The Winchesters. There is so much sacrifice in this song, and that’s really what they’re all about. Right? “Oh I hope to be seeing you soon, don’t know what’s out there, more fear I assume.”

Poison Oak// Bright Eyes - This one, oh my god. I feel like this one is from John’s point of view. Maybe like after Sam left for Stanford. Plus the thought of Dean crying into John’s shirt because Sam won’t come home anymore breaks my heart. And I love it.

Home// Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros - This one, is so full of Sam and Dean and love. It reminds me of a hot summer that they spent alone together. Maybe Dean was 17 and Sam 13, and they were falling in love.

Favorite Record// Fall Out Boy - The song kind of speaks for itself, so you should really give it a listen. But honestly, it’s about riding in the car with someone you love so I mean… “And I confessed to you, riding shotgun underneath the purple skies.”

Green Eyes// Coldplay - Okay, the name kind of just lays it all out but, the lyrics make me picture the boys out on a long hunt where they have to do a lot of driving. Dean is mouthing along to a Metallica song and, this song is playing on repeat in Sam’s mind.

I wish I was// The Avett Brothers - Another day cooped up in a motel room, and Sam is laying on one of the old mattresses. Dean is out at the bar, and this is what’s on Sam’s mind. Or maybe it’s the other way around.

Two Again// Christian Burrows - OKAY. this song is so sweet and sad. Holy shit. It’s so spot on for Sam and Dean. Get ready to cry over the thought of them building Lego castles together to keep busy when John doesn’t come home for a week.

these last two are more J2, but I guess could be taken both ways!

Tall Cans Hold Hands// Told Slant - this song kind of speaks for itself. But I just gotta’ say. J2, taking a week off from filming to go to the lake and camp in a tent. “You’re my best friend and I need you. Do you know that?”

Nothing’s Gonna’ Hurt You Baby// Cigarettes After Sex - This song creates such an easy picture in my mind because I’m pretty sure it’s confirmed that J2 has done 90% of the stuff in this song.

I hope you all really like the songs chosen, fall in love with the artists, and more importantly fall further in love with wincest (and J2). Have a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

saikolikesdrawing  asked:

Hi Charity! I remember in a past post you said that mediocrity is death for Ne-doms. Well, I'm a ENFP (7w6) and I'm in full "I will never be good enough in anything" mode. Like, I feel like I will be a person with nothing special for all of my life. So I was wandering if you could delve more into the topic, as I always find your posts about Ne and ENFPs super useful (and relatable :P). Love your blog!

(Gif: Kenzi from Lost Girl. ENFP.)

Mediocrity is death because mediocrity means… normal. Nothing unusual to see here. Ne prides itself on its ideas. It defines itself by perspectives and ideas. If Ne cannot be unique, cannot bring a different perspective, cannot find some way to distinguish itself from everyone else, it is mediocre. Mainstream. God help me! I cannot have that!! If I have nothing to say, why speak at all? If I can spark no change, no thoughts, no challenge to others, I’d rather be silent than mainstream… or mediocre… or uninspired.

Just because people say nothing to you, does not mean you are ordinary.

Almost all the time, I scream into a void and no one answers me. My ideas are ignored. My thoughts go out to people who absorb them and give nothing back. I get zero feedback or discussion, 98% of the time. And I don’t like it. But that doesn’t mean people aren’t listening. They are just not responding – to me. That does not mean my ideas have no value, or other people are not bandying them about in conversation among their friends, or that I’m boring.

If you feel like people are ignoring your ideas (and that means you’re mediocre) – they aren’t. That’s not the reason for their silence. There are many reasons.

But let’s talk about Ne and unrealistic expectations of reality for a minute.

Inferior Si-detachment from reality makes ENFPs unaware of the actual impact they have on people. They tend to take their Ne for granted and may not feel “connected” to their audience enough to realize the true impact it has. Since Ne’s have such a low boredom threshold, you are bored with yourself / your life / your interests long before anyone else is bored with you. And you are way harder on yourself for BEING “mediocre” or “not-special” than you need to be.

The purpose of Ne, and what it excels at, is to see beyond what exists to the object in a more idealized state. To see a better version of… this person, this idea, this situation; to re-interpret it either to improve on it, or lament it does not live up to its potential. Since Ne is naturally inclined to this, it focuses on itself, and thinks: wow, I could be doing better. I could be making way more of a difference in the world! I could be AMAZING.

Ne isn’t realistic. It’s idealistic. So your expectations about what it takes to be “good enough” or “special enough” are… abstract.

When you have abstract goals, there’s no way to achieve them.

How special is special enough? What does special MEAN to you? What are some tangible things that “special” can be, that you can achieve?

What IS “good enough”? What does that look like? How do you measure success? By what standard? How do you measure self-worth? By… what? Books you sell? Friends you have? People who listen to you?

I have an unreasonable Ne-goal of “perfection.” I want my creativity perfect. Except… perfection does not exist. Why? Because everyone’s IDEA of what perfect looks like is different. “Perfect” is an abstract concept that just means “something you have not attained yet, even though you don’t know what the hell it even is!” Perfect means: without flaw.

Well, what’s a flaw? What constitutes a flaw? What I think is a flaw, someone else might not think is a flaw, so which one of us is right?

As an Enneagram 7, it’s possible your inferior Si is craving for you to slow down and become truly good at a specific thing. This hunger you have to be unique might be inferior Si screaming, “Do you EVER stick with anything long enough to get amazing at it?!” Ne-doms tend to try everything and “master nothing,” because they do not take the time (a thousand hours) to truly master a craft.

Slow down. Take more time with something you love. MASTER IT. That’s why Si is for. It’s what it does. Let it engage and help you learn the building blocks and skills necessary to use your natural talents for whatever it is you want to do.

Ne makes you funny. Deep. Quirky. What do you want to DO with it? What do you have TO SAY? HOW can you say it in a Ne-way?

Another thing: it’s okay to BE Ne. The very fact that you are, that you have this incredible gift and ability to see the world in idealistic or funny ways, to inspire others to attain greatness, to change your mind (often) makes you special. Look around. How many other people are you? No one.

- ENFP Mod

Hot Chocolate

From: Smutandfluffohmy

Character Parings: Peter Pan x Reader

A/N: Sorry my last imagine wasn’t so good, I still have more plans for ‘Vegas Baby!’ if you guys still want to read more which include dramatically changing the original HP story line and having the characters be in the Wizard War.

Prompt request: Nobody wanted this lol

Warnings: Cheating 

My eyes burned and my chest ached. Was it supposed to feel like this? Was it suppose to feel as if my body was imploding on itself? I could physically feel each heart string breaking off and hitting me against my rib cage. My heart hurt, my head hurt, my eyes hurt, everything hurt so damn much.

I opened my mouth to speak, to say anything, anything at all. Instead however unspoken words hung in the air loud enough to turn heads. Maybe just maybe if I spoke, this would turn out to be an illusion, a twisted dream. But I couldn’t I wasn’t able to form any words, all traces of language left my head and layed in my mouth.

Instead of words I let out a noise, a sort of noise a hurt dog would make. Was I just that, a hurt dog? A noise that would have been ignored under any other circumstance made the world stop just this once. This one time it made heads turn and eyes to look into mine.

Two pairs of eyes all looking at my face searching for words as if on my own face scriptures would magically appear. I felt like a fire that was smothered in water trying to ignite again begin inside of me.

Fury and hurt raged in my body. Covering every inch of me except my brain, instead of thinking with my head I thought with my heart that moment. Fire building up. Rage bubbling inside of me, a dangerous gizer ready to explode in any minute.

“I’m sorry to interrupt I’ll just close the door you filthy pig. Should’ve know you were good for nothing” I said as with the fire of a thousand suns I turned around and made my way back. My ears were pounding and I could hear my own footsteps and rapid breathing. As soon as I reached the door I ran as far away from the mess as I could, the fury and fire inside of me was burning me up inside. Melting my insides as if I was a candle. Oh god how I wish to be a candle and let me be engulfed in flames.

My eyes stung with tears and my breathing became jagged as I tried to make as much distance between me and them. I cannot believe I saw what I saw, I cannot believe the boy I liked did such horrible things. My feet kept walking , taking me somewhere in StoryBrooke. Heart broken and hurt my entire body ached. The cold morning air stung my face as I made my way to the only place I know would be open.

I placed my hand on the cold handle and pushed the door open, the bell ringing above my head and walked towards an empty booth. Sliding into the booth the cold material too cold for my bare thighs. I didn’t think about anything or anyone else around me, I forgot where I was entirely.

“Hi Y/N you’re here quite early.What can I get you?” The boy which was a good friend of mine said from the other side of the counter as he wiped down the probably already clean table top.

“Hi Peter. I don’t really know what I want” I said as my voice got lower and slower as each word passed my lips.

“We’ll how about I whip you up something special?” Peter said, I couldn’t see him but I could just sense the smile he probably had plastered on his face. I didn’t want to ruin his mood so I couldn’t bring myself to look up at him.

“Yea I would like that, thanks” I said as I kept looking down at my hands wishing I wore something warmer, wishing what happened didn’t actually happen, wishing someone cared for me and I would care for someone.

“Here you go” Peter said as he placed a mug in front of me and sat down across from me. Apparently I spaced out for a long time. As I lifted my head up I also didn’t notice that Peter and I were the only two people here.

“Thank you” I said as I looked up at Peter and gave him a smile, the best smile I could muster.

“Hey, have you been crying?” Peter said concern dripping from each of his words, and not fake concern but what seemes like genuine concern.

“No. Well yea” I said hesitantly as I looked back down at the warm cup in my hands.

“What’s wrong” Peter said as he leaned towards me as if we were surrounded by people and I were telling him a deep secret, a secret that nobody else could hear. Maybe it was something, a big secret that nobody should hear.

“Big breakup” I said as I brought the hot mug to my lips and took a sip as I looked up at Peter hoping he had heard enough.

“Wow I’m sorry, um well what happened?” Peter asked as he set the rag that was in his hands down on the table. I opened my mouth but no words fell out, speechless for the second time today.

“Well I walked in on my boyfriend cheating on me and I said some horrible things that I shouldn’t have said and oh god this is all my fault” I said as the tears started streaming down my face once again and oh god how I hate myself at this moment.

“Hey hey no don’t say that none of this is your fault” Peter said as he reached out to grab my hand.

“Isn’t it Peter? I mean all the guys I’ve ever dated end up cheating on me and I don’t know what I did to deserve this” I said as I let Peter get my hands and hold them in his bigger ones. As soon as we touched I got images in my head of a Forest, a beach and green eyes. My entire body stiffened and I looked at Peter then around me.

“Did you-”Peter said as he looked at me with those big green eyes, eyes I knew.The bell above the front door rang and we both looked at the door to see who it was.

My blood ran cold and hot at the same time, Peter squeezed my hands a bit tighter and I don’t know what snapped inside me but I could feel myself breaking away and could feel… myself? Coming breaking out.

Everything started breaking away, chipping away slowly but surely.

So Bellamy stands with Roan by the rover, waiting for Clarke to finish saying her goodbyes. Bellamy notices Roan’s gaze shift from the floor to Bellamy but he says nothing, neither say anything. The feeling of a secret being between them is heavy but no one is willing to bring it up yet.


“I can go along with this because I don’t see another way. But if anything happens to her, you and me are going to have a problem,” Bellamy firmly states breaking their uncomfortable silence.

Roan smirks. “Does she know?”

Bellamy’s jaw clenches, knowing in every part of his body what Roan means. “Know what?”

“You should tell her,” Roan smoothly says, knowing that Bellamy is following his every word. “The only thing worse than losing her is losing her before you had the chance to tell her.”

Bellamy remains quiet though he gets a sinking feeling in his gut just thinking about losing Clarke, let alone losing her before he can tell her how much she means to him. Bellamy says nothing but glances at Roan. He goes on, “If you’re anything like me-”

“I’m nothing like you,” Bellamy finally speaks.

Roan continues as if Bellamy never spoke, “Losing her would kill you more than death itself. I would know. I lost my beloved before I could tell her and not a day goes by I don’t regret staying quiet.”

Bellamy looks at Roan with a softened expression. Could he have anything in common with Roan, the man who kidnapped Clarke and stabbed him in the leg?

Roan speaks again, “I could see losing you would kill her just the same.” Bellamy glances at Roan for just a moment and sees his eyes fixed on Clarke. Bellamy shifts his gaze to her and lets himself feel what he has been terrified to acknowledge. He loves her.

“Do you ever wonder why I spared you?” Roan asks, pulling Bellamy from his feelings.

Bellamy looks away and Roan takes it as reason to continue, “My orders were to bring Wanheda to Polis alive. If I killed you, there would have been nothing left of her. I would have failed.”

Bellamy finally looks at Roan to gage if he is actually serious in what he says. Bellamy sees no trace of amusement, only truth. He knows Clarke cares about him but deep down, he always felt like she would leave him behind. Now this stranger, the enemy, is telling him that Clarke could possibly feel the same as he does? Roan must be lying.

Clarke approaches them and glances at Bellamy then to Roan and finally settles her eyes back on Bellamy. “Ready. Everything okay?”

Bellamy nods, “Fine.”

Bellamy loads Roan into the back of the rover and walks around to the driver’s seat as Clarke sits in the passenger seat. Bellamy can feel her eyes on his but suddenly he isn’t able to look at her, as if with one look she could know all of his feelings for her.


As Clarke stands with cloth in her hands getting ready to be tied up, gagged, and taken as prisoner by Roan once again, Bellamy opens the back for Roan to get out. Roan makes a move at Clarke to tie her hands but Bellamy snatches the cloth before he can and glares at Roan, who knowingly smirks before turning away.

Bellamy gently lifts Clarke’s hands and wraps the cloth around her wrists. He doesn’t look up at her, he can’t. Not yet. He ties a knot and runs his thumb across her wrists making sure it’s not too tight for her. Bellamy takes a second cloth and lifts it over Clarke’s head, careful to loosen it as it needs so it doesn’t hurt her.

Finally his eyes connect with hers which are full of concern and even fear but also gratitude and something else he can’t put a finger on. “It’s not too late to back out.”

Clarke softly smiles. “We don’t have a choice.”

“Maybe we do,” Bellamy quietly responds even though he knows it’s not true. He just wants to comfort Clarke, he can tell she’s
nervous. So is he. She nods at him and he understands, as he usually does. He carefully moves the gag to her lips and brushes his fingers across her cheek, leaving his palm against her jaw. Without thinking, Bellamy pulls her head to his lips and places a kiss on her forehead. When he steps back from her, her eyes are closed. When they lock eyes again, her eyes are full of the emotion Bellamy can’t figure out. He studies her and watches her eyes do the same to him, only stopping when Roan takes her arm and guides her away.

Clarke glances back at Bellamy once more, sending him a quick nod.

She’ll be okay. She’ll come back.

She will.

She has to.

Why people hate EXP Edition

So recently this has blown up especially in our Kpop community. And keep in mind that I’m trying my best to be nonbiased and I hope I can communicate with a clear head. This post is meant mostly explaining why many people are strongly hating on this Kpop group. I hope anyone reading this can understand how many people feel.
I’ll tell you about my first reaction. I first heard about this group as an ‘American Kpop group’ and that right away made me really confused. Because if a musical group is American how can their genre be Korean pop? Because they’re two different countries Kpop is specific to South Korea yet they’re American? I thought of ways how this could be possible maybe they’re a Kpop group that mostly performs in the west? Or all their members could be from the west? And then I saw their pictures… Token Asian dude… Oh no.
But I gave it the benefit of the doubt and assumed it was just a boy group with more diverse members. And I decided to watch their MV 'Feel like this’ and oh man. The MV itself was clearly imitating Kpop MVs, and the guys have pretty bad Korean pronunciation. I have to say it as someone who lives with Korean speaking people: Their Korean wasn’t good. That was my first reaction.
Now after some simple research I found out that this whole thing is just an experiment started by some Asian American women. But why they’re doing this experiment I couldn’t really understand. Really I don’t see the reason behind this. In an article from popcrush I found an interview from Bora Kim (one of the people behind this group) and I’m gonna break this down now so strap in, this article quotes, “I wanted to see what would happen if I made American boys into K-pop performers,” CUT! Alright any Kpop fan with a half a brain knows that this has already happened. There are plenty of successful Kpop celebrities who were raised in the west. So like wth?
Moving on she claims she did this by teaching these guys not only how to sing in Korean but how to “act like Korean boys” TF? There’s no specific way to act like a Korean boy. Sure you can educate the guys on Korean culture but that doesn’t make one act Korean which there is no such thing. I do believe that different countries do things differently obviously but I don’t believe there’s such a thing as acting Korean. I’ve met a lot of other Korean people in my time sure we can share similar mannerisms but we don’t all act the same way.
Aside from that this interview leaves some stuff unclear. Like how long were they taught? Do they have any musical experience? Or does anyone here have any knowledge about the Kpop or music industry in general? We don’t know. And this was the only interview from the people in charge I could find. So I don’t know why this experiment is happening.
I’m going to go into why people hate this group.
First off whether it’s intentional or not, they’re insulting. Part of my first reaction was that their Korean isn’t very good but I let it slide because I found out that they’re from New York and as far as I know none of them could speak Korean in the first place. But for a group that moved to Korea trying to make it in the Kpop industry it makes them look bad.
Secondly, they don’t seem to be serious. I don’t know if they’re aware of this but Kpop celebs have to train years for their career. It’s very difficult and many people work very hard. So for these guys who are just a part of an experiment to come to Korea and label themselves as a Kpop group just to see what happens it just puts a bad taste in people’s mouth.
Third the racial aspect, this is hard.
Don’t get this wrong there are Kpop stars who are African American and Caucasian. But here’s the thing, Asian people and this is inclusive of South Asian people often get the short end of the stick in the music world. But Kpop changes that. Kpop celebrates Asian culture and language through musical and artistic expression. So having these westerners who have no training or experience in the Kpop industry and assert themselves as a Kpop group makes people upset. A Kpop group shouldn’t be an experiment like this. So why?

Thanks for reading

TWC's Challenge Celebration!

So it’s official- we’re doing a writing challenge! I’m so excited to read what you guys come up with. As a celebration of hitting 1 500 followers, I’m really looking forward to reading everything you post.

There’s just a couple of ground rules:

1) When you write, make sure to tag me! I’ll try to like/reblog/queue it within a day or two of it being posted, but PLEASE send me a message or something if I don’t. I’d hate to miss any:)

2) Write a fic (obviously)! You can write for any pairing, reader insert or not. Remember to put warnings at the beginning of the fic if there are any. If your fic is longer than around 400 words, then please insert a Keep Reading.

3) Post them to your blog and tag me by September 1. If you need an extended date for whatever reason, let me know. I would like to have all the works posted on my blog as of September 10, but that may be subject to change. If it’s not up and I haven’t given a reason, let me know; I’ll probably hit something other than post.

4) Most importantly, send me an ask for the prompt you want! Unless I get an ask from you, I won’t reblog your fic- and I really want to!

If you have any further questions, PLEASE send me an ask.

Writing Prompts

- “Don’t make me hurt you.”

- “You lied to me?”

- “How long before we’re safe again?”

- “I’d let her step on my face.”

- “Is that… A penis?”

- “That better be a gun or so help me…”

- “Guava’s are a social construct.”

- “Does family mean anything to you?”

- “I haven’t slept in six days and to be honest I’m not sure I can tell reality from… I don’t know what the opposite of reality is.”

- “Chuck, I’d just like to personally thank you for mango smoothies.”

- “Doritos? What are we, desperate?”

- “There’s no time to explain, but I think I may have been stabbed. It’s cool though.”

- “Yeah, you shot me, but I kinda had it coming to me.”

- “I have a method.”

- “You could totally be a drag queen.”

- “Bitch I’m gay as fuck what are you talking about.”

- “Check out that Moose Caboose.”

- “You should wear spandex more often.”

- “That was not okay.”

- -“Will you come back?”

- “Guess again, Gordon Ramsey.”

- “You’re my new favourite sibling.”

- “I’m fired?”

- “Please don’t pursue a career in comedy.”

- “The meatball says no.” “The meatball can go fuck itself.”

- “That was about as much fun as a sandpaper dildo.” “As a what now-”

- “I’m gonna die.” “You say that every day.”

- "Ho don’t you dare eat my chips.“ ”… Did you just call me a hoe?“

- “What did you say?” “I said I could kick your ass, blindfolded.”

- “… Furries?” “Wow, ______, you must feel right at home.”

- “Go suck an egg.” “Okay.”

- “You don’t really speak French, do you?” “Allez-vous faire foutre.”

- “-I want to die.” “And I want a four cheese lasagna. Maybe it’s all for the best.”

- “On a scale of Taylor Swift to Beyoncé, how do you feel today?”

- “Her boobs are almost as big as Sam’s.” “Yeah- wait, what?”

- “Dean the Bean. That’s your stripper name.” “Do I want to ask why?”


@zeusmyster @assbutt-still-in-hell @mogaruke @emfrodo @spn67-sister @sammysbeanie @bluewhisperstale @littlewinchester67

anonymous asked:

Do you have any make up recommendations for those of us who are pale, but also have red splotchy faces?

Alright, full disclosure- I think I mentioned it once or twice but for the last few months I’ve been suffering from a (likely hormonal) skin condition that ranges from “needs a little TLC” to “my neck and face have cherry red splotches.”

For this reason, I needed a full coverage foundation. However… I’ve been blessed with generally poreless skin. I couldn’t do anything too heavy.

A few weeks ago, I reblogged a PSA about a Sephora deal and took advantage of it to get COVERFX Custom Cover drops.

These things are…. amazing. By itself, a quarter size of foundation could cover my entire face so well I look two dimensional and I would still have enough for my neck.

However, these guys are designed to be mixed into things.

I’ve been mixing N10 drops into either moisturizer, my L’Oreal True Match in N1, or both. I can’t rave enough. My makeup time is now a fraction of what it was. 

There is also a NYX dupe of these with a more narrow range of colors. Again, I can’t speak to the quality of the NYX dupe (though I gotta say their lip pencils are incredible.)

COVERFX also does highlighter, bronzer, and infusion drops. 

I don’t own any of them but I imagine it is a lot of fun to sit there and mix the perfect amount of rose gold or metallic pink into your foundation.

Sorry this post is so long- you happened to ask a question I’ve been waiting to rave to someone about!

The foundation is $42 in Ulta and $44 in Sephora. I happened to get a good deal between Sephora’s sale and my rebates… but this bottle is definitely going to last me a loooong time as well.

BTW, I do have rebate codes for both sites if you ever want to buy online.

anonymous asked:

Do you liked delilah as a villain?

Yeah! I like her a lot in general. She’s, obviously, a horrible, cruel person, but as a character, I like her a lot.

The wonderfully dark, flower-themed aesthetic and fashion choices aside, I find her fascinating. The game leaves this subject ambiguous, but I actually choose to believe her story. There’s always a possibility of her tilting it in her favour, especially since she’s insistent on putting the blame on Jessamine’s shoulders yet speaks little of her father’s responsibility in this entire story and the way he betrayed her trust, but overall, I believe she’s telling the truth and she is, in fact Jessamine’s half-sister and Euhorn’s bastard child.

This way, I believe, it gives her more depth, and receiving the Outsider’s favour as someone who was wronged and abused by those in power plays well into Dishonored general themes about classism. DH2’s “take back what’s yours” could be applied to both the protagonist and the antagonist, and the game itself recognises it by making Delilah say something along these lines at some point. She’s not simply vain and believes she deserves the world, she believes to be finally taking what was promised to her, she genuinely feels wronged and bitter about the way she was treated earlier in her life.

Her passion for art and creativity is also a nicely implemented part of her personality, I believe. Not just because that strive to create something new and something beautiful must have been what made the Outsider choose her and believe she might change the world with her immense talent, it’s also because she’s making herself visible through her art.

Delilah was denied any recognition by her father and remained in the shadows for the most part of her young life. She was an embarrassing secret to be hidden and an inconvenience, constantly waiting for empty promises of coming to light to be fulfilled, hiding in Jessamine’s closet to eavesdrop on her lessons, living in the worst parts of the city and being an apprentice to a better known artist. Until a certain point, she was almost non-existent, and the way she carries herself, presents herself, the way she, literally, puts numerous statues of herself everywhere, try to break that pattern in her life. In fact, other than making these statues, I’m sure she made a ton of self-portraits as well, even though we only see one, but even then, as it was pointed out before, all her paintings of other people are always names in a way that make it about her.

The “worship me” part kiiinda overdid it, I think, but my point stands, and I love the way she uses her talent and powers to make herself visible after being neglected, ignored and kicked by life for many years.

Tl;dr she’s not having any more of that shadowy existence, she’s a cruel, extremely self-absorbed person (to the point where she even makes the tragedy of Breanna losing her powers about herself, again), a skilled artist and I like her. She also made fun of Daud and i liked it too.