i could be in love with someone like you adam

And then one day after being fucked up for months, I realized something. I didn’t know her, and she didn’t know me. Just because I could tell you her middle name, or a record she liked, that doesn’t mean anything. That’s not a connection. Anyone could have that. Really knowing someone is something else, it’s a completely different thing. And when it happens, you won’t be able to miss it. You will be aware, and you won’t hurt or be afraid.
—  Adam Sackler (Girls)

do you ever think of the fact that ronan says “maybe i dreamt you” to adam, and that the only other person he dreamt is someone he loves more than life itself and do you ever think of what this implies???? about the fact that he already adores adam so much that he’s like, ‘i must have dreamt you’ bc how else could this happen??? do you ever realise that ronan is even more gone for adam than the fucking lotion and the fucking mixtape implies?????

this is probably going to be really bad because it’s my first time writing pynch angst but oh well here we go

  • Adam really loves Ronan (wow this is such a new concept) but he REALLY loves Ronan to the point where every time he sees him he’s like omg I love you so much and would be fine with spending the rest of my life with you, you loser but he can’t tell him that because Ronan is all sharp edges and out of his league and could never love someone like Adam back
  • At this point they’re already dating and yeah Adam knows that Ronan has a crush on him but he figures it’s just passing and won’t last very long and pretty soon Ronan will move on and leave Adam because honestly what else could Adam expect
  • So Adam goes over to visit and Ronan is acting kind of weird and Adam wants to bring it up but knows not to push his boundaries
  • So little known fact there are quite a few assholes (not naming names here) who have approached Ronan and told him that Adam is trash and Ronan shouldn’t be dating him because he’s only dating him for the money
  • And obviously Ronan basically threatens to kill them and gets infuriated because Adam is amazing and perfect in every way
  • But then Ronan starts thinking about it and he’s like, maybe Adam doesn’t really like me, how could someone like him ever love someone like me?
  • So Ronan has a tiny crisis and Adam notices and finally after an hour of awkwardness and Ronan kind of ignoring Adam, Adam finally asks what’s wrong
  • Ronan says he is fine and that nothing’s wrong but Adam knows it’s bullshit
  • Adam is full on nervous at this point and Ronan does the only thing he really knows how to do in these situations: push people away
  • So he starts an argument over something stupid like “geez, parrish, didn’t know you were so clingy and obsessive” when Adam is trying to ask what’s wrong
  • Adam instantly knows what Ronan is trying to do so he keeps his cool and asks him again what’s wrong but Ronan keeps making it worse
  • “nothing’s wrong, if anything you’re the problem asking so many damn questions”
  • “Parrish, would you stop following me around like a stupid dog and leave me alone”
  • But Adam is genuinely concerned because Ronan is never like this towards the people he loves and something must be really wrong, he wouldn’t just be mean for no reason
  • “Ronan, I’m really worried about you would you tell me what’s-”
  • “God, Adam, you don’t have to keep up such an act it’s disgusting.”
  • “Act?” And at this point Adam is just kind of dazed like wtf is happening and Ronan can’t control his words now because all he has ever known how to do was push people away
  • “Maybe if you spent more time at your jobs you could make more money than trying to get me to fucking pay for everything”
  • Ronan regrets the words as soon as he says them
  • Adam has a lump in his throat and is just staring at Ronan and trying to comprehend everything.
  • He doesn’t yell, or scream, or even talk for that manner, but he feels kind of like he’s about to cry which he hates. He just kind of looks around, stands up, gets his jacket and leaves.
  • Adam nearly starts crying the second he’s out the door because he can’t believe that’s what Ronan thinks of him and he’s so conscientious of every time someone even so much as buys him a bottle of water and he’s so nervous his friends will think he’s using him so to have the person he’s in love with think that of him is so h ea rtbreak ing
  • he also has always been so insecure about his financial situation like he would never talk about it but he hates that he has to work all the time and he hates that he’s always so nervous about getting good grades so he can afford to stay in school and he hates that he always feels so much less than his friends just because of that
  • And Ronan is still sitting in that exact spot not even fully knowing what had happened he’s still in shock but all he can think of is oh my god what have I done

feel free to send me prompts for fanfictions or headcanons!

How appropriate it was that Ronan, left to his own devices, manifested beautiful cars and beautiful birds and tenderhearted brothers, while Adam, when given the power, manifested a filthy string of perverse murders.

I don’t know what page this is from, but I know it’s from BLLB, and it gives me ALL THE PYNCH FEELS. Adam thinks Ronan creates *coughcough is* beauty, and Adam isn’t worthy. That he’s something disgusting, and that Ronan is some kind of god. Tbh all I want in The Raven King is Adam being like why me, Ronan? And Ronan being like because you’re perfect or I love you. Because all of us haven’t felt worthy, and wouldn’t it be great if maybe Adam (and the readers through Adam) could see that our self-hatred has no foundation and that we are really loved and respected by someone we love and respect? Just Ronan and Adam being each other’s saviors really makes me happy and hopeful and fluffy inside :)