i could be here for this


i say
if i could make you fade away
i could play the game i know so well
it’s a fair trade

many of the things i said
are made from the beautiful things i regret

anonymous asked:

for the love of all (un)holy things, stop tagging posts the full house of wincest and start writing fic, i beg of you

Dad’s finally home, and he’s drunk. Or–well, maybe more like halfway there. Dean doesn’t see him all the way wasted, hardly ever. Not anymore.

“C’mere,” Dad says. He’s slouched back on the little creaky loveseat shoved into the corner of the room, under the window. Sammy’s sound asleep on the farther bed, making those little snuffly sounds that count as snoring for him.

“Dean,” Dad says, and it’s no louder, it’s not even close to an order, but Dean stands right up anyway. He leaves the knife he’d been honing on the table and takes the half-dozen quiet steps and, when he’s close enough, Dad reaches out his free hand and reels him in, two fingers hooked into a belt loop, tugging, so that Dean climbs right onto the couch, settles his knees on either side of Dad’s hips and settles down easy. He sets his hands flat on Dad’s chest, and sighs. It’s been a while.

“You been good?” Dad says. He keeps his fingers hooked at Dean’s waist.

Dean rolls his eyes. “Yeah, of course,” he says, quiet. They’re always quiet, late at night like this. He settles his weight more comfortably into Dad’s lap. “Sammy’s all mad because the reading list for fifth grade here is the same as it was for fourth grade back in Poughkeepsie.”

“It’ll leave him more time for PT.” Dad tugs harder at Dean’s belt loop, just a little rough, and Dean sits up straighter. “Didn’t ask about Sam, kiddo.”

Dean looks down. Dad’s shirt is old, but soft, and he spreads his hands out on it, pretends like he’s looking at the faded USMC logo. “Got in a fight last week,” he says, finally. No sense in lying. Dad always sees right through it, anyway. “Kid was bein’ a jerk, messing with these girls.”

There’s a clink, Dad setting his glass on the side table, and then his palm’s on the side of Dean’s face, his thumb pulling at where Dean didn’t realize he’d been biting his lower lip. He closes his eyes and lets it go, and Dad’s thumb runs soft over where he’d dented it. His face gets turned, a little more toward the lamplight, and he knows Dad can see, now, where he’s got the last traces of the shiner fading down to yellow-green around his eye, the scrape on his jaw where he’d hit the ground hard before he came up and let Scott really have it.

“You win?” Dad says, after a minute, and Dean scoffs and opens his eyes, and finds that Dad’s smiling, just a little bit, just enough that Dean bets only he could really tell, and something in the bottom of his belly goes all pleased, squirming pleasantly.

“You win?” Dean says, because Dad was gone for over two weeks this time, and he doesn’t look bruised up or hurt at all, really, but. Dad nods, his eyes dark and still on Dean’s face, and that’s probably all Dean’s going to get, at least for now. He’ll have to see how Dad writes the hunt up, later.

Dad’s thumb traces over Dean’s cheek, rough familiar callus moving soft over his skin, and he finally unhooks his fingers from Dean’s belt, slides his hand big and warm and steady around to the small of Dean’s back and lets it rest there, heavy. Dean blinks at him, takes a deep breath. Dad smells a little bit like booze, ‘cause he always does when they’re like this, but also like smoke, and a little like sweat, and also just—like Dad. Dean doesn’t know how to describe it any better than that. Dad frowns, just for a minute, and for a second he looks like he’s going to say something, his expression going all distant and tight, and—Dean shuffles in closer, slides his hands up to Dad’s shoulders, and then he’s—he’s sitting right on top of where—and, yeah, the hand on his back hitches him even closer, and Dad’s eyelids flutter, and then he’s focused right back on Dean, right here in the motel room where he’s meant to be. Dean takes in a shaky breath and Dad’s thumb moves over his lip again, harder this time.

“Okay, kiddo?” Dad says, only he’s not really asking. Dean nods anyway, immediately, and licks his lips, and watches Dad’s eyes drop to them. Maybe—maybe tonight—and then Dad tugs him forward and Dean curls right down and then he’s being kissed, steady and good, Dad’s beard scratching pleasantly over his lips and chin and where his cheeks are still soft. He stretches out over the broad plane of Dad’s chest and Dad’s arm curls steadily around his waist, and he’s still awkward, doesn’t really know what to do with his tongue, but Dad doesn’t seem to mind. He doesn’t know if they’ll finally do anything, either, but maybe this is enough, anyway. Dad’s softer, like this, and it’s nice—the gentle warmth of their mouths, the whiskey taste of Dad. Dean likes it better from his mouth than he does from the bottle. Even better, when Dean pulls back for a second to breathe, the way Dad’s hand curls over the back of his neck and the way his face is soft, relaxed, and the way when his eyes open they immediately find Dean’s and Dean can tell he’s thinking of nothing but this, nothing but him, and Dean smiles, can’t help it, and leans down to keep Dad’s attention right here.

So I’m thinking about branching out into digital art at some point here, maybe as  a christmas/birthday present to myself. What are some good, relatively cheap tablets/pens? And if I’ve got a touchscreen laptop, could I get by with just the pen, or is it better to get the tablet too? For that matter, would any of this work with a laptop?


Season 7 promo vs 7x04


But we’re a million worlds apart..

So I was on @cartooncommubackup​‘s stream and a Camp Camp portal AU came into the conversation. Sorta realized camp must be a lot like Portal from Max’s perspective. Also friendly David GLaDOS who thinks the tests are fun for Max?? Anyway, this random thing became my warmup drawing for today.

[TRANS] ‘Seventeen’ Magazine 2017 Aug Issue - BTS Interview (P2)

JPN - KRN © cher_bts
KRN - ENG © ktaebwi

Currently on tour, BTS’ popularity has crossed borders and is spreading around the world!

RAP MONSTER: We came to many countries but Brazil left the most impression on me. I learned for the first that through the local news that they set up tents and stayed outside the concert venue few days ahead to buy our concert tickets.
JIMIN: I was really surprised!
SUGA: We travel around the world but mostly we just stay inside the hotel. I use the remaining time to make music there. That’s why I always carry around music equipment.
RAP MONSTER: You have a pot too. (laughs) He uses an electric pot to boil water and cook ramyeon or instant food he brought from Korea to eat.
J-HOPE: It’s really important. I bring a pillow too. It’s not too firm or too soft and fits my neck perfectly. I don’t have to worry even if the hotel’s pillow doesn’t fit!
JIN: I play guitar which I’m into lately in the hotel. We all do what each of us wants.
V: I bring my favorite book of Gogh and read it.
JUNGKOOK: I’m listening to music on my speaker… But the other members often scold me.
V: They said it’s too noisy. (laughs)
J-HOPE: When we say so he lowers the volume. (laughs) One time Rap Monster scolded him and he turned the volume down, but he couldn’t hear the sound like that so he brought the speaker to his ears to listen. I laughed and asked if he did all of that so he could listen on speaker.
JUNGKOOK: I told you the sound is different!
RAP MONSTER: What does Jimin bring?
JIMIN: I don’t bring anything special. Bringing myself is enough ♡

The real side of each person only the members know.

JIMIN: Our leader Rap Monster-hyung is a clumsy “destruction god”. Not just breaking stuffs, he also loses his phone time to time, tripping when there’s nothing around, or spilling coffee and stain Jin-hyung’s shirt… It happens a lot. (laughs)
SUGA: But he’s really smart. He’s got an excellent language ability and he’s the best at Japanese.
RAP MONSTER: I’m embarrassed~
V: J-hope is the dance leader, he dances the best. He’s also reliable and takes care of us well.
J-HOPE: I’m just doing my job.
JUNGKOOK: Are you being humble? (laughs)
J-HOPE: I’m serious. (laughs)
RAP MONSTER: Jin-hyung - the matnae* - takes care of us well too. He likes food so he cooks for us at the dorm or…
JIN: I’m busy recently so I can’t cook at all. I’m not eating a lot for my diet too.
SUGA: He shares a room with me. I hate when it’s loud so he always stays quiet for my sake. I like quietness and hate when there are too many people.
RAP MONSTER: He suddenly talks about himself when we’re talking about other members. Suga-hyung is really “mypace”**. And he’s always spaced out and lethargic. (laughs)
SUGA: I’m lethargic because I need to prepare my energy for music. Told you it all has a meaning! Jimin is “Slow Jimin”, this one word is enough. J-hope is the fastest and Jimin is the slowest. That’s the daily life of BTS.
JIN: But Jimin works harder than anyone else. He always dances or sings in the waiting room
RAP MONSTER: Is it the result of his effort? He has a cute face and great muscles.
SUGA: But… He’s always late.
ALL: (laugh)
JIMIN: Let’s talk about V next.
JUNGKOOK: He really is an amazing person.
V: I’m not amazing~
JUNGKOOK: He says that but he’s really amazing. (laughs) He talks out of the topic or question, even when everyone else is all “?”, he ignores and continues. And he forcefully makes everyone understand him.
V: I’m working hard on talking to the point too! But what can I do when I can’t think of anything? It’s hard for me too!
J-HOPE: I didn’t know that. (laughs) Our maknae Jungkook, as you can see, he’s perfectly handsome.
V: Is he always handsome like that? Hmh, is he…? When he sleeps… (giggles)
JUNGKOOK: What? (nervous)
J-HOPE: Nothing, you’re handsome when you seep too. It’s okay. (laughs)

*matnae: mathyung (eldest hyung) + maknae
**mypace: living or doing things without being affected by other people’s opinions or actions

The never-ending chatter of men! The close-knitted 7 people. When asked “What boosts your mood up?”, nearly all of them answered “The members”.

JIN: Sometimes we need to go work on our own… I indeed gets bored. It’s the same when we film individual cuts for music videos, if the members aren’t around I feel lonely.
JIMIN: The one who boosts my mood up is our maknae Jungkook. He’s mischievous so he always makes us laugh. But Jungkook said he likes tasty food more than me…
JUNGKOOK: Tasty food makes me happy ♡ If there’s food in front of me, I would take a bite out of happiness. Even if I’m full, it’s fine. I’ll get hungry soon after I sleep for a bit. I can keep eating all the time. (laughs)

For the question “What do you want to have at the moment?”, the answers of these 7 people who are busy everyday are!

RAP MONSTER: Time. I want to have some time with my family. I want to travel with my family. We had a concert in Japan last year and my parents along with my sister went on a trip. I couldn’t go with them… I was really upset.
J-HOPE: I have never had a family trip before too. I want to travel with my family!
JUNGKOOK: I want to travel too. To America or Japan. Who do I want to go with? (glances at J-hope sitting beside) J-hope-hyung ♡
J-HOPE: Wow! I’m happy! Jungkook finally knew how to live in life. (laughs)
V: I want to have time too, but I want to have paintings more. I like Gogh the most. There are around 10 paintings in my room.
JUNGKOOK: Are they real?
J-HOPE: If those are real they would cost hundreds of millions. (laughs)
JIN: I want to have an island. I filmed on some island last time and they said it can be bought with 30 billion.
RAP MONSTER: You don’t need to buy an island. We’re going to Hawaii or Okinawa anyway. (laughs) Oh snap, it’s time to end the interview! Let’s greet properly for the ending.
SUGA: Please listen to our single “Blood, Sweat & Tears” a lot and look forward to our Japan tour too. Please give BTS a lot of love!
RAP MONSTER: Our hearts are always… Seventeen ♡