i cant help myself when it comes to this video so

I’ve been seeing a man in my backyard for the past two nights

Story by reddit user Opinionson

To start I need to give some background:

I am a male who lives in relatively nice neighborhood

It’s your average small town run of the mill suburbs area with not a lot of people.

I am a college kid who’s home on break while my parents have gone away which doesn’t help at all.

I have a two story house

I do not have gun nor do I have any real weapons other than kitchen knives

I am not on any medication and I have no record of schizophrenia or any other mental illnesses

I barely have any relationships with my neighbors most of whom are elderly and the rest I have minimal contact with

I do not have any people in my neighborhood (that I know of) who have reasons to attack or harm me

Now, let’s get into what has been happening. About two nights ago I woke up very late in the night and I went to the bathroom to go take a shit. Now, my second story bathroom has a window that can see the entirety of my backyard. Directly behind it is a cul de sac which you can see directly into. There is a group of trees and pile of rocks and mulch that divides it. Usually I can see everything in my backroom without turning on my because lights from my neighbor’s house dimly lights the room.

Keep reading

Day 1: My room turned into a ocean. I swear I found fishes and sharks swarming into my lungs. Or maybe that was the remains of you trying not to escape but desperately needing to
Day 2: You weren’t at school today and I should’ve been happy, I was more sad
Day 3: I thought I was ready to move on, then I saw you with her.
Day 4: We haven’t spoken in days now. My mind thinks its being shoved off a cliff.
Day 5: I wish it would just hit the bottom
Day 6: This will be the first weekend we dont hang out. I know you’ll be seeing her and I know youll be smiling without me. I’m trying hard to learn how to too
Day 7: I asked you for help on a history assignment and you replied with “Ask Amber im busy”. I texted back: “Tell Emma I said hi”
Day 8: You posted a video with her on the only social media site you have. When I saw it I erupted. I spewed lava every where, oh god its every where
Day 9: My mom made me sleep next to her on the couch. She was afraid I would try and do something like I did two years ago when another guy tore up my heart. I actually had thought about it
Day 10: I slept in your sweatshirt one last time so i can feel myself engulfed in you. I know you wanted them back so I had to feel you and smell you one last time.
Day 11: I gave you all of your stuff back and you thought I looked like a warrior but really I went home and tried getting you out of my bloodstream
Day 12: when will my eyes stop flowing?
Day 13: I snuck out with a boy and smoked weed on his couch. He talked about love and how much it hurt. I only pictured you.
Day 14: I woke up next to that same boy and I woke up screaming. The boy was worried and confused but I knew why I screamed. I imagined you laying with another girl on your couch. I ran out of his house so fast you’d think Id be better at running from you.
Day 15: Its spring break and im with my best friend and your with her and i swear i can feel you tracing her spine the way you used to trace mine
Day 16: I ignored your birthday and it felt worse than the puking i did that night
Day 17: Im treading icy water while you’re swimming away from me, I guess I just hope you’ll loop around and find your way back to the shattered, but still there, us
Day 18: I don’t remember the sound of your voice I don’t remember the color of your eyes I don’t remember your the taste of your lips
Day19: No amount of screaming gets your name out of my head
Day 20: I got on a plane today and when we took off I swear i almost walked to the door and started flying
Day 21: They say it takes 21 days fo break a habit but I think I just manage to fall more in love with a greedy monster
Day 22: I saw you today and wished you a happy late birthday and promised we’d watch the third Hobbit together. I’m beginning to hate myself more
Day 23: Its the end of the month maybe next month won’t be filled with thoughts of you and killing myself. i think im beginning to be over you
Day 24: april fools
Day 25: i think i understand now. when you first told me you loved me your mouth curled up on the edges, two days before you left when i gave my bare self to you your mouth was a straight line when saying i love you
Day 26: if you’re trying to kill me its working
Day 27: i woke up this morning to my blankets and pillows piled in a corner in my room. its something s ghost would do to make his presence known. im haunting myself. or maybe its the ghost of us tsking over my body
Day 28: its almost been a month since you told me it was never me. i almost texted you happy easter but i saw those text messages and just got angry
Day 29: I hate that you act like you didnt break my heart. i hate that you think im fine that im not writing a shit poem sbout your shit personality
Day 30: thirty days since you’ve wanted me. thirty days since i told you i love you. thirty days since you’ve slipped from my fingers. i tried catching you. you’ve been gone far too long. thirty days is too long
Day 31: i had a nightmare last night about you. you told me you loved me and kissed my forehead. i woke up breathing heavily and shaking. i want you out of my life
Day 32: running on no sleep isn’t fun
Day 33: ive been awake for over 50 hours in fear that ill see you in my dreams again. i cant risk that. it hurts so much. get out of my head
Day 34: my mother told me that love will do this. that its cruel and torturous and breaks you into such little pieces not even yourself can pick up all the pieces. you know where they all are, please come back and pick them up
Day 35: i talked to another guy last night we stayed up late and he asked me questions about you. we were sober so it wasn’t easy spitting up vowels and similies and euphemisms explaining the empty feeling in my chest after you left
Day 36: fuck if i stopped seeing you everyday i swear id be over you.
Day 37: my knee didnt touch your leg like it used it i promise i didnt do that fuck
Day 38: you told me that the wrinkles on my leg bothered you when i sat down. thats not what you said when we were trying not to get caught in the back of your car
Day 39: you told me you’d take me to prom and in two days itll just be another day you promised to spend with me. its funny how our plans turned to dust in a matter of seconds after cleaning
Day 40: the thunderstorm of us was inside of you and maybe that why it felt so close. i keep counting the seconds between the boom and light hoping you arent moving away buy i fear that you are already letting others feel your storm. the plants you grew are dying. maybe you should come back to water them
Day 41: ten days since its been a month since you left. i cried at prom because all i could look for in the crowd was you.
Day 42: i got so drunk all i could see was your face. the guy i fucked kept telling me his name wasn’t yours. i just screamed and cried because you’re all i still think about despite your efforts to continue to push me away
Day 43: i should be getting high today but if i do ill just write more and think more about a guy who will never care
Day 44: i think im trying to gain feelings for someone else because it’ll make moving on from you easier. im afraid to write that it hasnt
Day 45: you traces my leg like you used to. it was like dandelion tea. it made my insides fill with happiness. you’re my yellow paint.
Day 46: Van Gogh used to eat yellow paint because he thought it would put happiness inside him. He would consume it everyday in the hopes that it would bring his sadness to rest despite the fact that it could kill him first. i gues you were my yellow paint emphasis on the were. see im not going to write about you anymore, because when i write you down im under the impression that you’ll stay with the words but you don’t. this is the last sentence I’ll ever write about you

Rika's back and MC gets left P. 4

Rika is back and MC gets sick at the same time she feels abandoned. Part 1 (x) | Part 2 (x) | Part 3 (x) | Part 4 (x) | Part 5 (x)

  • Rika felt a sense of satisfaction
  • She got off being the one everyone considered the most
  • sure, she lead MC to the RFA
  • sure she made a lot of trouble for MC and the rest of the members
  • But the one thing she did not want anyone to forget or even ever know really was
  • it also meant she could take her out of rfa with ease
  • And they wouldn’t ever know it was her or care if all went to her plan

– Yoosung –

  • From the last time MC invited Yoosung over, he remembered where she now lived
  • Why didn’t I visit her sooner?
  • Yoosung made his way to her building, knocking repeatedly and waiting for a response
  • Where is she? It’s almost midnight…
  • He almost gave up when she didnt answer either calls, text, or the door
  • Rika! Yoosung was surprised to see his cousin walk by
  • “Yoosung, what are you doing here so late?”
  • I came to see if MC is okay, shes been MIA for a while
  • “She’s fine! I talked to her not too long ago and she said that she was going to visit her family for a few weeks. I forgot to tell you guys about it too… sorry.”
  • It’s fine, don’t worry about it! Though, it would have been better if she told us herself…
  • “I dont know the details, but something about one of her family members being recently diagnosed with a terminal illness.. Yeah, it was terrible. She said they started to cough blood and she went to go help them through the process. Poor MC.”
  • You’re genuinely concerned for MC, you’re so nice Rika.
  • “Ofc, shes a memeber of the rfa too!”
  • Sorry, its just i know you dont know her that much, but im glad you guys get along well. Do you know when she’ll be back?
  • “I think after the funeral. Though it may be longer since i dont know how shell be okay after all of that. Next time we talk, ill ask her, okay? How about we go visit V? Im sure hes awake and wouldnt mind if you came over for a sleep over”
  • Yoosung felt like a huge boulder had been lifted from his shoulders now that he knew MC was physically okay
  • He felt bad that she didnt tell anyone that she was leaving to tend to a sick family member
  • But he felt that he would forgive her since she seemed more of a private person
  • I should get her a gift basket when she comes back; poor MC will be greiving when she returns- I could add chocolates and that coffee she likes with an uber soft blanket. Yeah, i wil do that for sure when RIka tells me when she comes back
  • Yoosung wanted to be a shoulder for MC when she came back since she was there for him when Rika was gone
  • he wanted to prove to her and himself and RIka that he was more than just a college student who played a lot of video games; that he was also a capable man

– Zen –

Zen has entered the chatroom.

Zen: MC! Please call me when you get this!

Rika: Zen, I forgot to tell everyone that MC went back to her home country to take care of a sick family member. I didnt want to say anything right away but she told me just recently that it may be a while before she returns because of how bad things are …

Jahee has entered the chatroom.

Jahee: Oh no that’s terrible. Is her family member in that bad of condition for MC to leave without saying bye?

Rika: I am afraid so. From what I know, they are really ill that it is now deemed terminal.

Zen: Oh man, i really thought something happened to MC

Rika: What do you mean?

Zen: I dont know, I thought maybe she got bored of us and left us or something happened to her health wise. I hope she knows that we are all here for her when she comes back

Rika: Dont jinx anything! I’ll let her know though that you were worried whenever we talk again ^^

Jahee: Please do. Id feel much better though if I could talk to her soon. Do you think you can let her know to call me please?

Rika: I will pass the message along!

Zen: me too please, I really miss her :c

Rika: I will, you guys worry too much ^^ dont worry guys, everything will be perfectly fine ^^

Zen: alighty then, i gotta go and meet some directors to talk about my wonderful gorgeous face making its appearance on stage soon, bye~

Jahee: Oh my heart!

Rika: Good luck!

Zen has left the chatroom.

  • He didnt trust Rika
  • He didnt even trust Jahee at the moment
  • He knows he saw MC at the store that night
  • And it seems highly unlikely that she would just leave without explaining the situation
  • Especially if someone she cared about was really sick
  • Would she?

– Jahee –

  • From what Mr. Han had been accumulating she knew what was going on somewhat
  • Though if the rest of rfa should know she didnt feel like she had a place to tell them
  • She did abandon MC just like the rest did
  • She wont deny that what the rfa did to MC was abandon her at a time she would have needed them 
  • despite all MC probably gave up to help them 
  • But she didnt want anyone to be in the unknown
  • Although, she didn’t know if Rika was lying or telling the truth maybe rika did know mc was sick and didnt want to tell because MC said so
  • Jahee didnt want to risk anything by letting the cat out of the bag cringing
  • For now all she felt like she could do was gather as much as she could about people with pneumonia 
  • She would look into it since that was all Mr. Han told her
  • Maybe find some coffee as well for MC and maybe chocolates as she thinks about pleading for forgiveness 

– Jumin –

  • He had no right to act like he should care for MC anymore
  • The moment they all left her, everyone in the rfa lost all the rights to care for MC
  • The only thing he could do was offer her the best treatment possible when he found out what she had it made him very uncomfortable to not know what she was suffering from
  • aside from the stabbing pains of being betrayed that he couldn’t fix for her
  • but that was only if Seven could find a way into breaking MC out of there
  • But he knew the longer they waited the worse she would get
  • When he saw MC through the camera on Sevens screen, he knew he never wanted to know what it felt to lose someone again
  • After he though rika died, he felt like his world tipped over
  • But if he loses MC, he knows he wont ever have a reason to go on living with himself
  • He did find comfort knowing that MC never seemed to have had lost her personality and all that made her so easy to be around
  • By the looks of it, it was all thanks to Paco who never seemed to leave her side
  • Are you almost done?
  • “I want her out of there as soon as possible as well, okay?”
  • Jumin was taken back with how Seven snapped
  • “Dont let it get to you, he always gets like this”  the famous ‘Vanderwood’ who leaned on the side of the wall said
  • I dont want to know
  • He decided he didnt want to get into what Seven did on his own time also bc ‘Miss’ Vanderwood was slightly scaring him
  • “Just get the IP address so we can get there and go”
  • “I cant just do that! Well, I can but there seems to be more stuff this guy is feeding me atm and its all about MC”
  • “Look at it when you get her out of there! Poor girl must be seconds away from kicking the stupid bucket”
  • Excuse me?
  • “DOnt take it to heart, he gets angry when he has to wait before a job”
  • “Shut the fuck up, I still have my taser, you oaf”
  • What do you mean hes feeding you?
  • “I mean, this Unknown guy wants her found but for some odd reason he cant let her go… idk myself, but it looks like hes just doing his job
  • “What makes you say that?”
  • “RIght here it says: Job. No. Yes.- Unknown
  • Isnt that a good thing then? That means we can get MC out faster
  • JUmin didnt care for all the extra side stuff
  • He wanted to just get to the point and storm in there to save MC and take her to the doctors he had on standby
  • Just hurry up!
  • “I would want to bu- OH shit”
  • Jumins heart stopped for a millisecond thinking that MC died
  • When he didnt see anything abnormal on the screen that showed MC he was confused
  • But looking at what Seven saw
  • He understood
  • Is that Rika?

– 707 –

  • Watching RIka give MC injections of unknown substances made him physically want to scream
  • Why would she do that?
  • What was she even giving MC?
  • Where is Unknown?
  • “Damn, white loaf can really go on strong” he ignored Vanderwoods snide comment focusing on V holding MC down so Rika could give her another injection
  • “Let’s go now Seven, no more playing around!”
  • Okay okay, let me just get this on my laptop so we can watch as we go
  • “If we take my helicopter we could be there quicker”
  • Yeah lets do that
  • Seven was in a daze
  • As he looked into the breadcrumbs Unknown was giving him
  • He began to wonder why Unknown even took MC away if he was going to help them in the end
  • Unless he too was forced into do this all
  • But why would Rika do this? What could she gain from this?
  • “Please dont”
  • Seven turned to look at Jumin who looked at him when they heard MC’s voice
  • “Ready or not here it comes~” Rika sang
  • “You both may want to look away” Seven heard Vanderwood say before turning away
  • Not once had he ever looked away from the screen while on the job

  • You begged her to stop
  • Whatever it was, it wasn’t the same anymore
  • You began to remember names and faces but you couldn’t match them together
  • Please stop this, it hurts!
  • “Sweetie, you’re dying anyways, this is me being merciful and helping you go faster. Be thankful.”
  • What about that other stuff? What was that other stuff?
  • “It will all be over quickly if you just listen to her, please MC”
  • You turn to look at the stranger with the sunglasses: who’s MC?
  • Am I MC? Are they talking to me ?
  • You think you know them but you can’t match any faces or names at all
  • “I’d ask if you have any last words you want me to give to someone but at this point, you probably don’t know if you have any friends or family “
  • You shake your head trying to think
  • Somewhere someone has to know who you are
  • Why can’t I talk?
  • You panic; thrashing your body away from the woman and man
  • “Stop it!” You hear it before you feel a stinging sensation on your cheek
  • “Like I said,you’re already dying “ the woman says as she huffs for air
  • The look on her face scares you
  • It looks like she’s enjoying whatever is happening
  • “You should never talk to strangers “ you feel the weight of something hard crash on you holding your face down on the now cold floor
  • “Don’t ever go to places you don’t know”
  • The pressure intensifies making your head build more pressure like it will explode
  • “Rika, that’s too much” you hear the man from earlier
  • Help me please! you silently beg 
  • You wonder why he doesn’t help you
  • “Stay out of this V”
  • You feel something stab your shoulder
  • Then you don’t feel anything at all

– Vanderwood –

  • Seven was annoying
  • Richie rich was annoying
  • They all were pissing him off
  • The rush to get to where this girl was chaotic
  • He was used to the silence that Seven would accompany him with
  • But not like this
  • This silence was deafening and suffocating

– V –

  • He didnt want to harm MC
  • she was one of the good ones 
  • but he didnt want to make Rika any worse than she already was
  • He knew 707 or Jumin must have caught on by now 
  • with the help he got from Unknown, he knew they would make it but not soon enough
  • He made sure that whatever happened; it would all be on him 
  • Even if MC may never wake up again
  • even if Rika would spend a lot of time in the hospital 
  • even if Jumin and everyone in the RFA should come to hate him
  • even if he should become the villain; 
  • he would do whatever it takes to preserve Rika’s legacy and love and pride
  • He just needed for MC to hold onto life 
  • She was already sick 
  • and the medication he had replaced with the medication Rika wanted Unknown to give her seemed to have been working 
  • He made sure Unknown gave her the treatment she needed
  • But he didnt anticipate for Rika to inject her with a strong dose of whatever she had made for MC
  • By the looks of it 
  • it definitely was not the same that he had Unknown give her

– Unknown – 

  • Any minute now, it would all be over 
  • one way or another, MC would no longer suffer
  • He knew that by lying to Rika he was compromising his safety as well as Saeyoung’s
  • But he couldnt kill MC slowly
  • not with what RIka had made for her 
  • No. 
  • Instead, he made sure he gave her the medication she needed 
  • he made sure that Saeyoung would find the bread crumbs he left 
  • He expected Rika to pull something big for the finally so he made MC an antidote to what Rika had 
  • he didnt give it to her yet but he would have to leave it for Saeyoung to find if Paco didnt find a way of getting the vile out of his jacket before they got to MC
  • All he needed now was to find a way to make amends 
  • To MC and to everyone else 
  • but he would do that after he found a way to forgive himself and Saeyoung 
  • because if he didnt make him hate him; none of this would have happened 
  • and MC would have had treatment for this and have never been involved 
  • When would Saeyoung see how toxic both were to everyone else?
  • Especially to someone good and simplistic and perfectly normal like MC. 
  • Did Saeyoung even know?
  • Did his brother know how toxic both brothers were to everyone?
  • Like how toxic they were to one another.
A Little Mistake Messenger

Ch. 1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6 Ch. 7 Ch. 8  Ch. 9 Ch. 10


Summary:  MC has exciting news to tell Zen and the other RFA members. That is until the MC gets a shock from Zen. MC finds comfort in a close friend, Jumin Han.

Rating: M (language and adult themes)

Tags: Mystic Messenger, Jumin x MC, Zen x MC

Authors Note: I’ve been working on a 707 series while also working at this story as well. So that’s exciting! I hope my Jumin fanatics like myself reallllly enjoy this chapter. I’ve been listening to a Firefly music festival playlist for a lot of inspiration to get my butt in gear. 

I’d love to hear from you guys about what you like or what I can improve upon. Keep liking and sharing to spread the love <3 

Lazy weekends were the best weekends especially after Jumin got home from his business trip. Jumin was napping soundly on the couch Elizabeth the third purring on his chest with his hand on her body. I smiled to myself as I watched the two of them snoozing the afternoons away. I grabbed a blanket and gently laid it across his legs and on lower part of his chest. His top shirt buttons casually unbuttoned. Elizabeth moved in his arms at the startle of the blanket but settled back into her position once she realized I had helped her out.

I sat back down on the lounge chair and scrolled through my phone.

MC has logged into the Chatroom—

Jaehee: I’m relaxing at the beach getting some sun.

707: I burn to a crisp in the sun

Oh MC is here!

MC: Jaehee how is vacation going?

Jaehee: You can keep my job forever if you would like. 

Has Jumin ran you up a wall yet?

MC: hahaha hardly. 

Everything is good on our end, however business end is a different story.

Jaehee: What happened was it his father again?

MC: not quite Mr. Han per say more like Jumin’s fiance.

707: wait hes engaged that damn bastard

MC: no don’t misunderstand this is not his choosing.

Jaehee: and what happened?

MC: they may or may not believe that Jumin and I are-

Jaehee: He did what?

MC: Its just a misunderstanding, until Jumin can collect enough information to refuse this marriage proposal.

707: Oh thank God! 

I was worried that I would have to come save you from Jumins clutches. 

Defender of Justice to save the innocent MC from the gate keeper Jumin.

MC: all good on this end here! 

Seven don’t worry I’ll know who to call to save me next time.

707: All is well then.

Defender.

Of.

Justice.

Out.

-707 has logged out-

Jaehee: I have to go too I need another drink.

MC: Don’t have too much fun you have to come back soon!

Jaehee: No promises here.

–Jaehee has logged out—

 It was inevitable that I would run into Zen news on my Facebook page. South Korean Musical Actor Trending in the United States of America. I quickly scrolled past the news page my friends shared on Facebook. Hyun Ryu and Amelia Corina officially an item? I turned my phone over trying to ignore the burning feeling in my heart. 

I could not tear my eyes away at his calm and collected mannerism. Did he even lose any sleep over me? He looked as if he didn’t spend too much time letting a breakup hinder his acting and public appearance. Hyun was somebody now, and I was just holding him back. It took me a week and RFA taking turns keeping my mind occupied before I was finally composed enough to be alone.

Why was I craving to see him, was it because he was happy and doesn’t seem to be too worried about a cheating scandal? I still cared for Zen. I will always love him in some way or the other. I cant forget the man that he was before things started to go downhill. Still, I can admire him from afar. Maybe one day Jaehee and I can fangirl over him and we can bring the baby to watch Zen on the TV.

There were thousands of pictures mostly of Zen, and selfies on date nights. Late nights under the stars, his motorcycle, backstage at his musicals. Was he happy? Was he finally accomplishing his dreams? Did the woman in the new pictures know how he likes his DVD collection at home? How he snores lightly when he’s exhausted from a long night of drinking?

I looked at my camera roll on my phone hesitant to look at the beginning. If I wanted a clean slate I needed to delete photos off of my phone. It was going to be now or never. I selected every photo, video, selfie, and saved screen shots I had saved since I met him. I quickly hit the delete button before my heavy fingers would change their mind. Clearing out all the memories, and moments that I treasured the most with Zen. I took a deep breath as I emptied my trash bin on my phone.

I felt as if a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I could start looking forward to cute baby pictures. I finally opened my text messages and deleted any and every message with Zen involved in it. It would be better to rid myself of the temptation to look back and feel sorry about myself. I smiled to myself that I was finally released from a large amount of temptation to look at those photos that brought me so much happiness.

I was startled by Elizabeth crawling in my lap. I looked over at Jumin who was lazily stretching out on the couch with a loud groan. I pet her soft white fur as she sat down between my legs encouraging me to pet her.

“Have you decided to sit with the ladies?” I said to Elizabeth who was enjoying extra attention from another person.

She cozied herself up on my knee and sprawling out. “She just wants more attention” Jumin said groggily and I laughed at her cute little face and tail.

“Jumin, Elizabeth the Third needs a womanly figure in her life to keep her straight. Sometimes it’s good to take a short reprieve from her favorite and only man in her life.”

He laughed and sat up on the couch, blanket wrapped around his shoulders and hair disheveled in all directions. I smiled to myself at his rare and slightly appearance. Jumin would hate to look like a mess in front of anyone.

“What are you smiling at?” He asked looking at me seated on the edge of the couch arms resting on his legs.

“Nothing!” I told him scratching behind Elizabeth’s ears averting his stare and blush on my cheeks. I took out my phone and took a quick picture of Elly. I knew who to send this picture to, Seven. Seven immediately responded with heart emojis: “Elly my love! She is so adorable! Jumin however looks like he just woke up with the bad case of bed head.”

“Wait was I in that picture that you just took?” He asked sitting upright on the couch. “Maybe. A lady never divulges her secrets Jumin.” I teased and he smirked. “Can I see it?” He asked softly.
I got up and sat next to him on the couch and showed him the picture.

“God is that what my hair looks like?” He ran a hand through it in an attempt to fix it only making it stick further out. I laughed uncontrollably at his hair and his expression when he asked me if it looked any better. He got up and went to his room. “Can you help me since my efforts have been to no avail.”

“Yes Jumin.” I sat on the top of the couch and had him between my legs. “Let me know if I pull your hair.”

I carefully brushed his hair back towards my body. “Have you ever worn it any other way or has it always looked like this?”

“Its been the same for as long as I can remember.”

“Jumin have you ever been in relationships with other women before?”

“What?”

“I didn’t mean for it to sound like that, I just never have seen you show interest in many women our age. Nothing is wrong with that I was just wondering.”

“Women are out for my fathers money and influence not so much myself. The way to my fathers heart seems to be through winning me over. None of them actually cared for me or was around long enough for one anyways. Most women only see me as money and future CEO.”

“I understand your difficulty then finding someone you can actually trust and talk too aside from V and Rika.”

“Yes it was only them for a while but now that V is absent and Rika passed I only have Elizabeth.”

“You have me too Jumin.”

“I know and I’m thankful for some sanity in the madness.” He sighed deeply. “How does it look?”

“It doesn’t look half bad pulled back.” I said and he got up to look at himself.

“If I didn’t look old before this makes me look much older now.”

“I think you look mature, well you already looked mature. More mature.” I said shuffling down to the couch.

“You think I would scare Jaehee if I wore it like this?” He asked smiling as he ruffled his hair out with a shake of his head and hair returned to its normal position on his head.

“I think she would think something was wrong.” He smiled shaking his head.

“What were you doing earlier on your phone? You looked upset?” He asked concerned tone in his voice.

“Hmm oh I was just deleting photos.”

“Of him?”

“Yes of him.” Silence deafened between the two of us before he spoke again.

“You still love him?”

“I don’t love him now but I think I always will hold a place for him. There is a baby that will probably remind me of Zen every day soon.”

“Is love a strange and powerful emotion?” He asked sitting back down on the couch his arms reclined back on the couch behind him. I looked at his face searching himself for some grasp on his tone and curiosity.

“Love?” How do I describe love?

“Well love is different for everyone,” I tried to explain. “Theres the love you have for your family or your father. The love you have for your friends V, Seven, Yoosung, and Jaehee. Finally there is romantic love that you feel towards another person.”

“I love Elizabeth the Third, is that more a familial love?”

“Yes exactly shes a part of your family.”

“Familial love is similar to when Yoosung and Seven talk about chocolate milk and cat jokes?” I nodded my head smiling. Jumin trying to make mental connections to the emotions he was feeling and putting a name to the emotion and it was written on a furrowed line on his forehead. The wrinkle he gets when he is deep in concentration and deep thought. He was silent again before he spoke up once more. 

“What about romantic love?” His asked softly in my direction. 

I took my time trying to find the right words in which to describe romantic love to him that would make the most sense. Your heart starts racing uncontrollably out of your chest around them. Your face gets red when they say anything remotely similar to flirting.” He nodded his head. “Do you find it hard to eat when you think about them?” he asked genuinely. “I think so depending on the situation.”

He met my eyes in an instant, “I think I know what it is.” His hand rested on top of my hand his eyes locked with mine. His fingers grasping onto the sides of my hand and making small circular motions with his pointer finger. I took a deep intake of air before speaking “Romantic or passionate love for another person I think is when you put the other person before yourself, and you worry not just for your needs but for theirs and in a more intimate way. Physically and mentally.” 

His dark eyes stared into my own and I was memorized at the deep color of them as our eyes locked onto one another. “I think I know what it is,” he said moving closer to me on the couch. My face felt warm under his intense stare. Jumin closed the space that was between his lips within inches of my own. I closed my eyes in anticipation of his warm lips to meet mine. His hand sliding to the back of my head. 

There was a loud knock on the door. I immediately sat back and lowered my eyes to avert his own. He cleared his throat and buttoned his shirt to check the door. 

“Jumi! I came to-“ a loud and shrilling high pitched voice pierced through the air and could only belong to the voice of a red-haired, overly perfumed woman in a purple dress.

“This is not a good time Sarah.” Jumin said and she barged into his home. Sarah threw open the door that Jumin was guarding. He palmed his head in frustration. .

“Oh shes here.” I shifted in my seat making sure my little baby bump was hidden from her watchful eye. Shit. The ultrasound was on his fridge. This could implicate Jumin already more than he already was.

“shes my lover of course she would be here.” Jumin said coming to sit by me leaning on the sofa arm casually.

“I brought something for Liz!”

“Elizabeth the third?” Jumin corrected

“yes the cat,” Sarah snared back at him.

I slowly got up to make my way over to the fridge. “Shall I let you two discuss?”

“No I want you to stay.” Jumin said grabbing my hand from my side. I turned to look at him and his expression pleading for help. His slim fingers intertwined into my own.

“So how did you two officially meet?”Sarah asked trying to latch herself onto Jumin. Her breasts spilling out of her top as she attempted to press herself to his arm. Jumin immediately shook her off in disgust and need for personal space. I gave him some space as he tried to push her off of him. 

“Well-“ I started when Jumin chimed in. 

“She is the coordinator for RFA parties for a while, and-“

“I have no interest in Jumin’s businesses, he’s a genuinely kind man with a huge heart.” I added as i looked at Sarah who looked like she bit into something sour and bitter. 

 “Romantic love will never last.”

Her comment struck a nerve deep within me. 

“I know that, more than anyone.” She started going through my papers i had laying on the dining room table. I stepped in front of her putting the papers back to their location.

“You have a limited amount of time with the people you love than you spend that time doing just that.”

“I have a right to see what those documents are since I am his fiance.”

“No you don’t. and No you are not. You can leave the gift for Elizabeth on the table and then escort yourself out.” I was fuming with annoyance. Jumin was smirking behind me at how little patience I had for this woman.

“Jumin are you going to let her speak to me in such ways? I know you are faking this relationship with your secretary. Wont you let me comfort you?”

“I find no issue with her tone.Is that so? We are faking it?” He said questionably at her comment. His arms folded against his chest in annoyance.

“MC.” Jumin said grabbing my arm and pulling myself towards him closely. He felt like he was on fire from the heat he was exuding.

“I want to be honest with my feelings for you. I had intentions on letting our relationship grow however I ant deny that there is a strong attraction to you. I cannot hold myself back any longer.”

“Jumin-“

I felt his hand on my chin and he pressed his lips firmly against mine. My mind went blank at his tender kiss. I wanted more. I needed more. But I also needed to breathe before I was consumed in his heat. I looked into Jumins eyes that were tenderly looking into my own. I don’t know how long we stood there just looking at each other. 

“You would kiss her in front of your own fiance!” Sarah screamed and loudly screaming at us both. Sarah must have let herself out on her own because I was too busy letting Jumin consume me with his tender kisses. Jumins hand placed behind my head. My hands holding tightly onto his shirt. I let my guard down and allowed myself to initiate the kiss again and pressed myself into his warm and soft lips. His tongue tracing around my lip as if asking for permission from my lips to enter.

He was the first to pull away his head resting on mine. “I have been wanting to kiss you for a long time now.” He smiled kissing my head as if I were a child. 

“Did you mean what you said earlier?”

“All of it.” He just held me tightly against his chest. 

“I have never felt this much before I met you.” He whispered into my ear and I smiled knowing that he was becoming more open with himself and allowing himself to feel. He pressed his lips against mine as if he was trying to consume the air in my lungs. My lips brushing against his over and over again.

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Stressy as Hecky

Originally posted by crankyethans

A/N: Ooh god please help. im having a terrible time. ive got so much fucking work im actually dying and cant make myself do a bit of it. vent write?  maybe. whatever its another “ethan likes to be helpful” fic. also guess the fuck wgat lol i wrote this instead of doing my own actual essay due in two days for my hardest class yikes lol. i hope everyone who’s doing their exams survives. good luck yall.

You shove the pile of papers away from you with a loud noise of frustration. There was just too much stuff. You prop your elbows up on the table and drop your head in your hands. Things felt so… shit right now. Every time you looked at your copious amounts of work, the words swam on the page and you couldn’t focus on anything, not to mention the hour you’d spent staring at an empty word doc, trying to type up an important essay. You could feel your hands shaking as tears welled up in your eyes. You tried to fight it but couldn’t stop the sob that escaped your mouth. You just had too much to finish and no motivation and you couldn’t stop thinking about all the things that would happen if you didn’t get this done.

You were so frustrated and upset. Just… ugh! You shoved your chair back, pacing up and down the room and rubbing at your eyes to stop the tears. The stress and hopelessness had been building up and was just waiting to crash down on you. “Fuck!” You lash out in your anger, kicking the wall hard. A precariously balanced book wobbled and fell off the shelf on the wall, hitting the ground with a bang. You clenched your fists and tried to calm down, returning to pacing. You didn’t know what to do. You wanted to do your work, but at the same time it was the last thing you thought you could force yourself to do. You felt so choked up and pissed off as tears sprang up in your eyes and began to slip down your cheeks. You made another loud noise of frustration.

“Y/N?”

From outside, Ethan’s soft, concerned voice made you crumple. You caved in on yourself and lowered yourself down to sit on the ground, hugging your knees close to your chest.

“Y/N?” Ethan’s voice, closer this time, rang out. The door to the room opened slowly and Ethan poked his head in. “Everything all right?” He asked, eyes going wide when he saw you on the floor.

You shook your head, staring at the carpet. You heard him shuffle in and you rubbed at your eyes, sniffling and trying to hide the fact that you’d been about to burst into tears.

“Hey…” Ethan says softly, kneeling down in front of you. “What’s wrong?”

You shudder with a heavy breath out and wrap your arms tighter around your knees. “It’s just so much…. Shit. I’ve got so many assignments and essays and I still have to get ready for finals and it’s all just… bullshit!’ God, I hate it.”

“I’m sorry…” Ethan tries. You know he can relate to the stress seeing as he’s raving about all his projects and video deadlines every other day, but school is a different type of Hell.

“I don’t want to do any of it. I’m trying really hard but it’s like… I look at the paper and none of the words make any sense, I just can’t process them. I’m having an even harder time focusing than usual. And I’m trying to force myself to figure it out and finish my work by thinking of all my deadlines, but that just makes me stress out worse and then I start freaking out thinking that I’m gonna fail and-” You gasp, deep and breathless. It’s too much. A sob tears itself from your chest and you bury your head between your knees.

“Hey, hey come here.” Ethan pulls you towards him and you move without protest. He pulls you into a tight hug, rubbing soothing circles against your back and cradling your head against his chest.

“I know this is stressful, Y/N, and there’s really nothing I can do to fix that. But you need to calm down, okay? Easier said than done, yeah, but you need to.” He pulls away to look at you and cups your cheek in his hand, rubbing his thumb against your skin and wiping away a tear. “Just think about it!” He smiles brightly, “All you have to do is finish this stuff and you’re done! No more assignments, just videos and creating your own life! You can do it, I know it.”

You sigh, leaning back against him and letting him hold you close to his chest. You focus on his breathing, trying to match up your own breaths. You stay there, letting him hold you, until you can feel yourself relax. Looking up at him with a sigh, you try to put on a smile. It’s small and still a bit watery, but it works.

“Yeah… okay. That’s good that’s a good way to think about it. Thank you.” You stretch to give him a kiss on the cheek. “I think I’m gonna take a break for tonight, though.”

“Sounds good.” Ethan smiles warmly at you.

“Wanna go watch movies on the couch with a copious amount of blankets?” You ask, smile becoming brighter.

“I’d love to.”

🔥First Steps To Pyrokinesis🔥

Originally posted by amethystnymph

Pyrokinesis is the psychic ability to manipulate and speed up the atomic state to the point of combustion. One usually begins manipulating a candle’s flame. In more advanced practices one can extinguish a candle flame or reignite a flame that has went out. Pyrokinesis is a branch of psychokinesis.



•FOCUS 🔥

I don’t know about you but I never have the time to meditate and I’m fidgeter so it’s hard to do nothing. If you like meditating however or your perfectly fine with doing it, I recommend doing it before you start. But if your like me and meditating isn’t your thing I find that it’s very easy for me to slip into a trance where I’m just a blank slate. To do that I just stare into space as I feel myself just drifting away (you can do it with your eyes open or closed ) and remember to start your breathing at first then it will become consistent. And that’s usually it. You’ll now hen you’re doing it when you feel floaty and absent.

Note: before this I recommend listening to calming music or music that makes you feel up for anything (for me it’s Rhiannon by Fleetwood Mac.. it gives me witchy feels)

•CONCENTRATION 🔥

(This means the same thing as focus??) Okay now that the boring (but necessary!) Part is over you can now light your fire. I find it best to work with small controlled flames (not that any of you would set your house on fire or something… please don’t) Matches and candles are best. I find matches burn too quickly, though. Candles in jars are fine too but for me it worked a little better with open flames. Next, connect yourself and the flame, stare into it for a while. Feel it’s energy. (Are you feeling it Mr.Krabs?) This may take a while but it helps hugely to feel comfortable and connected with your flame. Don’t put strain on yourself, the point is to concentrate without much thoguht or effort. This is optional but try holding your hand a little above the flame (not too long to burn yourself though. You’re not the ruler of the Fire Nation, buddy) Feeling the flame’s heat and energy helps you concentrate better on the element of fire.

Remember it’s all about connection.


• VISUALIZATION 🔥

Okay, real business now.

Get your source of flame an light it (duh). Try to close you eyes and vividly see the flame, feel the energy.

Now after all of the above (and I do mean all of the above!) Attempt to move the flame with your energy and imagine it moving in the ways you want (flicker, up, down, side to side) You are definitely not gonna success over night (unless you are an amazing natural at it, and in that case, congrats!) so keep practicing and please do not get discouraged, have absolute faith in yourself.

Pay attention cuz things are gonna get wordy.

If you are a beginner I strongly recommend  you try to do the ‘dancing flame exercise’ which is basically making the flame move.

After you’ve completed the beginning first steps now you are ready to move up.

Extinguishing your flame (like how I demonstarted (i cant fucking spell, sorry) in the video on my blog. Like the beginner step you are NOT going to get this over night, probably not even in a week. It took me months and literally a million tries  to actually do this. Not to mention doing this takes a lot more power and concentration.

Anywhoo, the method I did for extinguishing is;

Really it’s basically just what I explained, the only thing different is that you’re going to have to imagine and give energy to the flame extinguishing. Fire can’t thrive without oxygen so I concentrated on the energy (or air around it) closing in on the flame and the flame slowly dying out.

The next step after you complete beginner and intermediate is advanced and that’s re-igniting the flame. which I have yet to do.


•ADDITIONAL QUESTIONS AND TIPS 🔥

But first;

Consistent practice, meditation techniques  and concentration can achieve pyrokinesis, controlling energy and your mind is kind of a must for this.

Also don’t do anything stupid. Fire is still extremely dangerous so never leave it unattended and blah blah blah, I’m trusting you know fire safety. If you don’t I strongly suggest you go learn some before attempting anything. I’m serious.

Onto questions!

How exactly do I put my energy into the flame?

It’s easy, visualize yourself surrounded by energy, I imagine my energy as gold or blue because it’s the color of my aura and it just feels like the right color. Imagine a tunnel like string coming from yourself to the flame or visualize a ball of your energy and send it to the flame. You can also imagine your energy absorbing you and the flame. Personally I feel warm and tingly when I imagine my energy.

What meditation techniques are you talking about?

Well using the techniques I gave, imagine fire too, like you controlling it and being surrounded by it, feeling its warmth, light and comfort. Feel at peace with it, it’s you’re friend.

How long until I succeed? How long did it take you?

Almost as long as it took me to write this post, when I should really go attend to my shitload of homework. I’m joking (kinda). It’s going to take TIME, practice, practice. You are not gonna get it in a day, probably not even in a week either.
It took me 3 months to do the beginner pyrokinesis and an additional 4-5 months to extinguish it, so almost a year.

TIPS

I had a lot but I forgot it in the time it took me to write this. When I remember I’ll be updating this post so check back often! Um yadda, yadda, yadda (ever watch Chowder? Probs if you get it)

If you have any questions that I left out feel free to ask and I’ll update.

Back to my pile of homework I regrettably (not really) put of till the last second and procrastinated in doing.

Lilmswitch, out


Originally posted by wonderland-is-darkness

anonymous asked:

I'm trying to distance myself from Camila and 5h coz every time I see Camila I just get so angry and that's not healthy I know but i cant help it. therefore I want/need to get a way I tried not to see anything related to her and i was fine but lots of my mutuals are following her too and they tweet from time to time about her. I feel this way coz i don't support unfairness I don't honstly know what to do to get over my feeling for her specially since i don't know the truth about their situation

Wow ok… I wouldn’t usually respond to something like this but i sense that you are aware that your view of the situation is distorted but that you are finding it difficult step out of that mindset. So I’ll try to get through to you. We don’t know the truth of the situation but there are certain things that we know are true. We know that all five of these girls have been heavily exploited, overworked, probably forced to work for no money, had grown adults use their personal/private lives to make money, been told how to act [what to say, what to wear, where to stand] since they were as young as 15, have suffered mild to severe mental health issues, have had their bodies heavily sexualised since they were not even legal adults and come online to see vile abusive online bullying towards them as a regular part of everyday life. We know that they signed hideous contracts when they were young and desperate, which might I add, all five girls are still under. We know that they have basically no control of their public images because they signed away their rights to their public identity. They also signed away their rights to their own social media and agreed to confidentiality clauses that legally forbid them to say the truth about certain things. Can you imagine having millions of people judge you for someone who is not even you, but a controlled and edited image of yourself that your publicists have presented to the public… and not being able to do anything about it?

 All of this stuff applies equally to all five girls. You may think it is unfair that Camila was given the opportunity to have the first solo career, but please reconsider what ‘fair’ means in this situation. None of it’s fair. And by the way, after reading just a little bit about how the industry works, you start to understand that even if Camila wanted to leave the band, she is under contract and simply would have had no say in if/how/when it was done. Do not punish Camila for how her label/management/PR team have gone about this situation. This is an exploitative business where ALL the girls are victims to the people who have the ability to control them and make money off of them. There are real people trapped inside this mess. They do not equate to your perception of them based on what a magazine tells you about them, or what their role is in their label’s publicity campaign. They are living breathing human beings who, incidentally, you don’t even know. You don’t have to like her, but you have to understand that you have no legitimate basis to dislike her either. She’s just a person trying to get through the day just like you and I. I urge you to just view this in terms of compassion - have a little understanding. Being a compassionate human being is free and easy. And unlike judgement, compassion doesn’t put wrinkles on your face :) .

(p.s. if none of the above works and you are still stressed out by seeing Camila’s face, I suggest trying weed, chocolate, masturbation, exercise, listening to music, colouring-in, playing an instrument, having a bath, lighting some scented candles, watching your favourite TV show, looking up videos of baby puppies on youtube, taking a walk, did i already say masturbation..? All of the above should make you realise that judging strangers is a bad use of your mental energy.)

anonymous asked:

hi hi I hope no one has asked this already, but could u maybe give some pointers on how to draw bodies ??? :-0 whenever i draw them they look so stiff and awkward,, the way u draw bodies is so flow-y and gentle ??thank u so much!!!!

hello! of course im glad to do so👍 firstly, i think its pretty self-explanatory but anatomy and the flow of your style develops with lots of practice and time, and what i say after this is the less important part. what helps you the most are making studies of pictures and life, bodies of different sizes and shapes and positions – and poses especially, if u think ur figures look awkward u should stock up on some poses🌝 (i personally never took part in such thing but model classes seem especially useful, since theres a time limit to each pose, it forces you to not dwell on smaller/unimportant details too much, realise what are those details that you do need to picture the likeness of that pose and body, and generally makes your work quicker and flow easier).

  • reference: should i explain this. reference is all artists pal (until ure not copying others artwork) please use references.
  • learn general anatomy rules: body is 8 heads long, feet size = lower arm size, etc etc, there are plenty of anatomy guides about this. these also help when anatomy doesnt feel right but u dont quite know whats wrong. its mostly about developing an eye for proportions, comparing sizes, what should be in line with what; how that changes in shifting positions and angles (like the ears in relation to the eyes when the figure looks up and down post that blew up recently(?) i cant seem to find it lol if anyone has it link me pls so i can link it here as well,,,,) ; and in what ways/how far can the body and limbs bend.
  • leave sketch behind: it kind of requires you to clear the previous point but. the reason i stopped sketching (usually only do when i need to plan where to place the body n stuff in a background) is that since general proportions come to me naturally now my drawing becomes stiff if i do the lineart on a sketch, also i tweak and adjust anatomy a lot along the way so. my sketch wouldnt be more accurate anatomically than the end result and it gives me no real guide. sketching helps u at the beginning stage of learning anatomy as it allows u to think abt bodies in a simplified way (a circle with a cross on it for head we all kno✓), but later it can drag u down and it might be better to move on. also, the common problem of the sketch being more dynamic than the lineart. all my linearts are cleaned up sketches, if we put it that way🌞👍
  • develop a routine: actually this is more of a workflow/speed/not feel so lost tip but it might be useful idk. for the longest time, no matter if its a portrait or full body pic, ive always been drawing body parts in the same order: eyes, eyebrow, nose, mouth, sideburns (yes to locate where ears will be), ears, fringe/forehead area, hair/head, neck, collarbones (to locate shoulders), upper body, hips (to locate what way will legs go), lower body. a video of my sketching to demonstrate 🌚 since hands are p expressive and easy to misplace i usually draw it before the rest of the arm (like a figure leaning on their hand, i get to the collarbone, then the hand, then arm).
  • break down to parts: makes it easier to process the  details. this actually came to me thinking about hands, but applies to the whole body. on a hand, i think of phalanges as different compartments and draw it as if it was a mannequins hand placed together of different premade parts in the shapes of joints and such, and if it looks too much i erase the extra lines (but not always, as seen in the pic below). a ball jointed doll (altho often they have v twisted proportions, and might not go into details on parts like feet) is a good example on how to break it apart imo but im sure there are guides on this online as well. generally meat and bones and stuff that are in one chunk lol. it also helps if u draw the difficult things (hands usually) on a different layer so u can drag it around and see where it fits best. idk if that sounds weird but its part of my pose making process sometimes o(-(
  • zoom out, flip the canvas: i put this after the previous point to enhance: dont work too zoomed in, only on one part of the body. i mean ofc cleaning up lineart is another thing but seeing the whole of the pose and the body is how u prevent misproportioning and misplacing. breaking it apart and then putting it together in the right places and sizes is what we want to achieve here. flipping the canvas horizontally can reveal anatomy mishaps that u might have not even noticed so good to make it a habit.
  • lasso tool and transform (obv only if u work digitally) : my Best Friends :-) as said i adjust anatomy (or the pose even) a lot while linearting and use these two lots. make use of the transform tool not only with sizing but shearing and this thing here that allows u to swish ur selected area around by dragging or how to explain its rly useful.
BTS WINGS IN NEWARK

SO, I’ll just get to it and tell you about my experience seeing BTS Wings in Newark. Luna and I went together so when I say “we” that’s who i’m referring to.
We got to the line at 9 am and it was already wrapped around to the other side of the building. The day started out cold but it got even colder to the point that the rain that started to fall became snow momentarily. There was also a St. Patrick’s Day Parade happening for some of the waiting. We all had to wait in line until about 1 pm for the Prudential Employees to hand out numbered wrist bands, that way we could leave the line and come back later and have the same spot. I was #819 in line. There was a really nice Japanese fansite girl who spoke Korean and a little English behind us. She said she flew from Japan. JAPAN! dedication man… anyways she gave our little line group a pack of really awesome Jungkook photocards she had taken. Her fansite is 하트트리‏ @HEARTTREE_JK on Twitter. Here the cute Photocards (Just the JK ones, Luna got me the Yoongi ones and I don’t know who made those)

  
After we got our wristbands we finally went to the bathroom and ate lunch and stood in line for that photo booth that has the video of your bias. After standing in line, you go up to a table with two girls and they check to see if you filled out the survey before they let you pick a ball blindly from a box. If you pick an orange ball you get a photocard and a personal photo with your bias. If you get a white ball, you just get the photocard. I happened to get an orange ball :D !
When you get the orange ball you wait in line again and they direct you to one of the photo booths where you enter and they close the curtain. You choose which member you want on a touch screen and then a countdown begins. So obviously I chose yoongi. He entered from the right speaking korean so I couldn’t fucking understand but I mean he was cute I think he was just telling me to do the poses he was doing or something, I hope someone took video of it and translated it anyways. He was too cute. I chose the V pose picture, you had the option of choosing which of the two photos you liked the most. I’ll show you his part of the photo because I look atrocious. 

Yeah, he cute.

One of the girls who went in after me absolutely freaked out and was screaming and laughing like crazy, I wonder who her bias was… I bet it was Jimin….
 All the staff for the photo booth were laughing with the rest of us. It was cute.
After that, we wanted to get some merch but the line was freaking HUGE and they were running out quick so instead we asked a couple girls at the front to buy what we wanted in exchange for some extra cash.


Then we went back to the hotel to warm up and change and headed back to the line a little later. They started letting us in through security check around 5:30 I think. It took an hour for us to get to the security check. 

Here is where I want to point out the extraordinary amount of trash and debris that was strewn all over the ground, increasing as we got closer to the doors. No doubt left behind by the people that camped out overnight or early in the morning. There was blankets, trash, makeup, and food spilled everywhere and i was highly disappointed and embarrassed by our fandom. There were trashcans and trash bags everywhere that they could have used so there was ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE FOR THAT MESS. And even though some of us tried to clean up there was just TOO MUCH. And the line kept moving toward security check. I hope BTS didn’t see it :( . 

Once we passed security we flat out ran to the pit to try and get as close as possible. We got pretty darn close, maybe 15 rows of bodies?
There were two screens on either side of the stage playing BTS’S mvs in chronological order of their release. We all sang along and watched while we waited until 8 pm. The energy increased as we got closer to showtime.
I can’t exactly remember but I think the show started directly after BS&T MV ended. Immediately as the lights dimmed we were forcefully shoved and pushed closer as a video reel began playing. I will break that up in two or more videos and post on tumblr soon so you can watch.
The pushing and shoving was absolutely REDICULOUS. Not to sound like the old person in the room but OMG. There were people falling and fainting and I literally was holding the people in front of me so we both didn’t fall. Do not get pit tickets if you needs space or are clostrophobic. 

Your body is pressed against strangers harder than it’s ever been, I mean I got to third base with everybody around me.

Every time a member moved across the stage, the crowd would shove that way, I ASSUME so they could follow with their phones. Wtf, just turn your phone, NOT YOUR FUCKING BODY YOU ANIMALS. Anyways. It got bad enough that the security was repeatedly telling us to back up and a move so they could help people who had fainted and fallen and almost NO ONE was listening. EVEN BTS AND NAMJOON HAD TO STOP AFTER THEIR SONG AND TELL US TO STOP AND BACK UP AND CALM DOWN I MEAN COME THE FUCK ON PEOPLE. I’m embarrassed for American ARMY.

So I’m not gonna go through the song order because I could never even begin to try and remember that. Especially since I couldn’t see half of it. 😡
But I will describe as much as I can.
Omg where do I start.
The most memorable thing for me was HOBI surprisingly because he’s not even on my bias list, he’s like that best friend that I would never be attracted to but OMG he was so flirty and sweet and cute and I could tell he was enjoying himself the most. All those smile and cheeky grins.
“I’m your hope…… you’re MY hope….. I’m Jhope!!!”
Omg I love him so much. He did something to me that night. I wanna squeeze him and hug him till he pops.

FUCKING JIMIN WAS RUDE AS ALWAYS. he bent down and interacted with the front rows the most, with that stupid sexy grin and face and aaaaaaahhhh!!!! He killed.
Kookie was the one who bent down and interacted the most after Jimin with that cute smile and bright doe eyes I can’t even begin to describe how much I love him.
Tae was being cheeky and cute the whole time as expected. He did that tongue bite and smile and I can’t believe I fucking saw that 15 feet away from my face I’M DEAD. he also had that rude, intense glare a lot too, but let’s not talk about that AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ha.
I didn’t see much of Nams or Yoongi unfortunately but every time I saw Nams he was amazing. His dimples. Ugh. During cypher he did that dorky but adorable jumping he does, you know what I’m talking about. At some point I was in the middle and so was he and he was turned to the side and I’m just gonna say that I had a clear and up close view of that crotch AHHHH FUCKKKKKKK. he also smiled and laughed a couple times like a cutie.
I barely saw Jin. I’m sorry for you Jin stans reading this but he killed his solo song. He did beautifully and we all sang with him. UGH, MY HEART.

 SO. Kookie’s solo. That fancy footwork, I mean damn. He killed it. And not to mention he was wearing a white satin shirt that was immediately soaked in sweat and sticking to his chest YAS! Literally during the second or third song, he did a turn in the choreography, I don’t remember what song it was sorry but as he turned I could literally see the sweat fly off the ends of his hair. Sadly, it did not hit me in the face. I saw his beautiful hands and his mouth moving as he sang, ugh. I will never not appreciate every moment.

 Namjoons solo was chill and deep as fuck. He told us to
“feel the flow and rhythem”
and let his hand just dance in the air as he rapped/sang with closed eyes and it was so beautiful and I did. I felt the music. When it came to his “I wish I could love myself” we all shouted “WE LOVE YOU” after each time. I hope he really knows how much we meant it. 😢

 Yoongi’s solo was also chill and heavy. His song always makes me too emotional to the point that I barely listen to it. I cant, it’s just too much. As expected he rapped so passionately and I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him. There were live instrumental and I was so excited for that. It was beautiful BUT they didn’t play the end of his song the same, so that drawn out violin/cello wasn’t there, I was kind of disappointed because that’s my favorite part. But it was still amazing.

 Jimin’s solo. I mean. Yes. So. Fucking. Good. I. Cant. Even. Begin. To. Explain. The lighting was on point. He was on point. The dancing was flawless, the blindfold part was so fucking good, he is amazing. It was sexy and powerful and just right. Jimin stans, how are you still
Alive?

 Taehyung’s solo was so great, he hit that high note from what I could hear, which some people said he didn’t do in the previous concert. I’m not sure if that’s true though. At some point he was wearing a silver choker and… omg. Like, hah, like, I’m so speechless. I’m sorry but Taehyung is so gorgeous, he really is the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen and I can’t understand it yet. His voice was smooth and soulful and So Fucking Good.

 Jhopes solo was amazing, the dancing was on point as always and during the middle there was a breakdown way different from just the original song, I wish I had taken more videos. I’m sure you can find it. Watch it. We all sang with him especially the end chorus of “hey mama!”, you know. He just did do amazing, he was so memorable, omg and gorgeous. I’ll say that Hoseok looks the best in person compared to photos or videos. Some people just look better in person and he’s one of those people. His hair for this concert was perfect for him, the color, the parted and flippy style. Mm, so good.

As I said, Jin did so amazing on his solo, he hit all the notes and he wasn’t shaky or messed up from what I could hear and remember. He was just chilled up on stage and singing out his heart with us. I managed to get a little bit of video with him at center stage and he was dancing with an ARMY bomb as always lmao I love him ahhh.

I only noticed one mistake the whole concert. At one point, kookie went to move from his position and he needed to cross to the other side of the stage as Namjoon was coming up the middle, they bumped into each other slightly but it was so small and they carried on so smoothly it was barely anything but it made me smile for some reason. Also, Jimin was just slightly off key at like ONE point but I mean, they’re singing and dancing live. I expect that. The others might have had a moment or two but I just can’t recall if they did.

I want to talk about their backup dancers for a second. Not only did they do amazing, they were so fucking adorable! Some of them were really interacting with the fans and it made me laugh so much. They would look at us, laugh, smile, and I could tell they were just really loving it. I assume they all want to either be dancers or performers/musicians like BTS and I could see the joy in their face at being on the stage and seeing the crowds reactions and energy. They really enjoyed themselves and I hope they can one day get a stage for themselves if that’s what they desire. Ah, they were so cute. 😁

 Towards the end, Namjoon kept saying “this is the last song” and we were all like lol nah, we know you’re coming back out lol. And they did haha. We had the rainbow ocean and Namjoon said “it doesnt matter what color you are, pink, purple, blue, yellow, orange, we love you” or something very similar. He was so amazing THEY WERE ALL AMAZING. I wish I had taken videos and pics but tbh, I wanted to just try and really enjoy the concert in person and focus on them with my eyes. Also there were so many people recording, there was no real point for me to do so as well. And the crowd was so pushy I was afraid of dropping my phone and it being destroyed. Knowing me, I would’ve dropped it.

 At the end, they were walking around and waving and sending hearts and such. People were throwing gifts on the stage, I noticed Kookie took a tiny iron man plushie and I thought it was so cute.
I can’t remember what they said at each brake but I really tried to get Yoongi’s attention. He was really focused on the whole crowd though. There was ONE point where he might have seen my, what do u call it, like his face on a stick thing, and he has this smirk like he was trying to not smile or laugh. I’ll show it below. 

The experience was amazing and next time I got to their concert I will be sure to camp out the night before because if I’m gonna buy pit tickets, I WILL be at the damn front next time! I won’t be satisfied until I am. I only buy BTS concert tickets for this reason, so I can save and get the expensive front rows. Also, P2 area standing is better than P1 because they interact more with us and we face them, so don’t bother with P1, I know a lot of people wanted those for like sound check or something. I forgot to say that at one pint I could see the back of Hobis, tan, sweaty, thick neck and all I could think was “Das a nice neck…" because it is, it really is a beautiful neck, I must say. 

And then we left the venue and my body was failing because I stood literally from 9 am to like 11 pm. It was worth every moment, even when it got bone cuttingly cold and started to snow and rain. WORTH IT. BTS is worth everything I have to give and I can’t wait to attend another amazing concert. Next time I’m taking a selfie stick or something and filming it all on my phone. 

SOOO, I want to also include that the next day, Luna and I went to Korea Town in New York and it was awesome. UGh, they had a Tony Moly and The Face Shop and so many restaurants. We at at Mukeunji and it was delicious. 
We popped into Nature Republic to buy some things, and the lady asked Luna if she liked EXO. She answered that she liked BTS and the lady SAID THEY WERE JUST THERE ON FRIDAY EATING LUNCH!!!!
BOI!!!! I swear to god, we both felt like dying, but i mean, we were waiting in line for their freaking concert so what are ya gonna do??! (JUST DIE, thats what im gonna do) those sneaky, clever boys….

(lmao i make myself laugh way to much)

So yeah, that was the concert and I probably didn’t properly describe it. I’m sorry for not having any videos or pics of the concert but I know you can find so many from other people. 

Here’s some other things I bought. Spoiler, its all basically Yoongi.

OMG hes so cute, they’re all so cute. My bedroom looks like a shrine….

Wedding Speech - Joe Sugg Imagine

A/N - Hi can you do a Joe one where it’s the reader and his wedding and the buttercreams do a really embarrassing speech for them x If you don’t want to or can’t that’s fine ❤

“I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride” My smile grew even bigger as I felt Joes lips on mine. Hearing everyone around cheering and clapping, I felt the tears building in my eyes. I finally married my best friend. 

Walking down the aisle hand in hand with my now husband smiling and waving to all our friends and family. My feelings right now wouldn’t process. I am literally over the moon with happiness. All I could hear were people cheering “Yes Sugg” “Go On My Boy” and a few faint cries. I still cannot believe this is my wedding day. The wedding day I have been planning since a little girl. I was now living it out. Everyone else was gathered into another room with champagne, me and Joe were guided around the building for photos. We had photos on the stairs, in arch ways, in the gardens, and in front of the country side view. We were then joined by the bridesmaids who happened to be my sister and Zoe, the groomsmen Caspar, Josh, Oli, Jack, Conor, Mikey and our parents. Lastly We had photos with the whole group and I stood there being grateful to be surrounded by the people i love most. 

While everyone moved to the reception room to take their seats, me and Joe waited back a bit giving everyone time to settle. 

“I cannot believe we did it” Joe turned to look at me with a beaming smile. 

“I’m still in shock, I’m generally so happy” I smiled back taking his hand in mine. 

“After 6 years of being together and 8 years of friendship I can officially call you a Sugg” 

“I finally fit in the Sugg family!” I cheered laughing. 

“You’ve always been classed as a Sugg babe” 

“But now we have it in writing”

“This is the happiest ive ever been, even though we’ve been in a relationship for so long, our next adventures start now”

“Our honeymoon, new house, new projects. Im so excited”

“Same love, it’s going to be something to treasure” 

“I love you” 

“I love you too”

“Are you two ready to go in?” The staff member asked. We glanced to each other and nodded. We followed the member of staff and waited behind the doors until we were told to go any further. 

“Can i have your attention” The staff member started. “We’re all there to celebrate the newly weds, so please put your hands together for Mr and Mrs Sugg!” We walked in and everyone was on their feet, cheering. Glad we got someone to film this day, I can look back and remember this moment for a life time. We took our seats in front of everyone while they all settled down and allowed us to get comfy. After all the food was served and drinks were topped up Zoe got out her seat to walk in front of the table with a microphone in her hand. 

“Hope you all are having a good time!” A few yeah’s and whistles flew around the room. “To kick off this evening, we are now going to move onto the speeches” Zoe turned to smirk at us both while i groaned and Joe nervous laughing knowing how embarrassing this was going to be. We watched as Josh took to the stage first also smirking as Zoe handed him the mic. 

Joe placed hand on my leg and lent in close. “You know this is going to be interesting” 

“I’m dreading it” I laughed turning to face Josh and linking my hand with Joes.

“I get the pleasure of starting this off. I remember meeting you Joe for the first time then i didn’t leave your apartment for months. I basically followed you and Caspar round like a lost dog. You used to get grumpy when i finished your milk or i didn’t wash up after myself. I can clearly say you haven’t changed. You’ve been a good friend buddy you’ve helped me through a lot of shit and i’m grateful to have a friend like you. I’m glad you found a girl like Y/N, she’s kept you in place but at the same time you’re still the Sugg i first met. Y/N you have a lot of work now that your married, he’s going to become even more lazy. You’re a talent women and you’ve been there to listen when i needed someone to. You’re like my sister and I wish you both the best for the future. Ill be round soon so you can cook me food” I’m glad Josh went first because he wouldn’t embarrass us. He’s the nice one out them all. 

Next was Mikey. 

“Cor i get to do a speech. I’ve always been the target and now i can target you two. You’ve been good friends to me over the past few years. Despite the bad things Joe has made me do or forced me to do such as having a leaf blower in my face to wearing tight red lacy boxers to trying to light my farts. I’ve even had to eat dry protein powder ruining one of my many black t-shirts. Joe your crazy ideas make you as a person, you’re one heck of a guy and you are very lucky to have Y/N, anyone would be. Y/N thanks for looking after me making sure i have eaten. No wonder i cant shed weight. I look forward to raiding your new sweets draw by the way”

Next was Conor. 

“I would like to thank Y/N for introducing me to Joe, because of you i made a great friend and because of Joe I made even more. Y/N i would like to thank you for staring in so many of my covers and even on my album. I mean i still say i have the better voice but I’m not going to judge. I cannot believe you two are married now, I’ve seen your relationship grow these past years and I look forward to having something like this. You two are literally a perfect match. Joe i dont even know what to say about you. You are one of the most hilarious down-to-earth guys i know. You deserve to be happy. I’m glad it’s Y/N who has to deal with your strange ass. I’m surprised she can handle it. She has to wake up to you farting, coming home drunk but then again thinking about it you are both as crazy as each other. I remember coming round once and you both swapped clothes pretending to be each other. That was a weird sight. I wish you both the world of happiness you both deserve it” 

Next was Jack. 

“Suggy got married! To a gorgeous girl also i should have started youtube sooner maybe i could of snatched her. Im joking im joking. Seeing how happy you two are together makes me want this but it also makes me sick but in a good way. You are both good friends to me i couldn’t ask for better people in my life. Well sometimes i could replace Joe after what he’s made me do. Clamping my hand, sticking sellotape to our heads and ripping it out our hair and daring me to run down the street naked. I hope you enjoy people licking your ears Y/N because Joe will be doing that a lot when he’s drunk. trust me. I remember Joe telling us he was going to propose and how nervous he was. You should of heard the other plans he had. They weren’t as romantic. Y/N thank you for appearing in my videos to give me more views. Thanks for the many shout outs too. Like i said, you’re a beautiful women inside and out i know how happy Joe makes you. You’re both weird and I’m glad i know you. Hears to the future”

Next was Oli. 

“Mr Joe Sugg? The Joe i know is actually married now! It feels so weird saying that. I’ve known you for so long and you haven’t changed one bit in a good way though! You both have helped me through a lot over the years with projects, videos, and life in general. I do appreciate it. Joe you are an absolute nutter. Seriously. I couldn’t ask for a better friend what friend would draw penis’ on your body or do jump scares every time we meet or would make me stay up will ridiculous times in the morning to set up pranks. I mean what friend would have a cardboard cut out of me? You better move that into your new home. I’ll always be watching then. Your relationship is probably the strongest i know. You’re both so open and that can be taken in different ways. I’ve seen them both naked. It was a few strange moments. Some moments i wish i could take back because i can still see them imagines in my head to this day. I also remember when i turned up at your apartment Joe was wearing this horse costume and Y/N was dressed like a cowgirl. I didn’t want to ask what went on. They said it was for a video but i dont believe that. I dont like to think what goes on in their minds. Moving on, Y/N you are one in a million you’ve been that one friend i can always rely on even if i’m in a bad mood you put up with me and i can speak on behalf of the other guys as well. You have so much patience and i respect you for that. You have a wonderful mind and a heart of gold. You are both lucky to have each other and im glad to call you both my best friends” 

Lastly, Caspar. 

 “I would like to start off with thanking Y/N for breaking my heart, you killed jaspar. I’m joking jaspar will always be round. I have known you both since we all started Youtube together. Remember our gang when we first started? The 3 of us, Zoe, Alfie, Tanya, Jim, Marcus, Niomi and Louise. Then it grew bigger. But look at the two of you now, i know you both never expected to get this far in life. I respect the both of you because you don’t take the famous title seriously, you just see yourselves as normal human beings doing something you love. It’s been amazing watching you both grow and seeing the success you’ve achieved. I couldn’t have wished it on better people. Joe, You are one or the bestest friend i could ask for. You are also one of the craziest dudes i know. Very spontaneous also. I could stand here all day and tell all our stories but i don’t want to bore you. Thank you for being my travelling buddy over the years. I’ve had some of the best memories with you such as doing Hit The Road. What an experience that was ay?  and for everyone’s information i am still the best pizza maker here. Im not thankful for the pranks though. Filing my room with cups of water, setting many alarms, posters of my face all over the walls, filling the room with balloons then Oli popping out with a clown outside and the best one turning my apartment into a slip and slide. I’m also not going to miss seeing you naked when i walk into your room. I am defiantly not going to miss hearing you and Y/N have sex either. You loud buggers. The amount of times i’ve walked in on you both, i still do it today it’s like a curse! Y/N, i still remember meeting you for the first time. You were so shy and timid and now, now i cannot get you to shut up. You are like a boy only when it comes to burping though. Ive seen you when you only had a few thousand subscribers and now you are the top female Youtuber in the UK. I am so proud of your achievements. You seriously deserve it. If i ever needed cheering up i knew you were and still are the person to text or call. You are a positive soul. You and Joe have always been perfect for each other. You are literally the same person. I hope you both the best as a married couple. I love you both.” 

I continued to wipe away the tears which were flowing from my eyes. I couldn’t of asked for better friends or a better husband. 

THE TIME HAS C O M E

So, as a preface to this, I would like to clarify; there are like, three basic types of high school au.

  • The cheesy 90’s movie type, with stereotypical groupings (I.E, theres the jock, and the Nerd, and the goths, ect.)
  • The Normal type, which is literally just the characters/people in a high school setting. Nothing special, but still enjoyable.
  • And then. There is the angst type. Family issues, reckless behavior, mental issues, found family/breakfast club-esque situation.

Take one look at the links I provided in the last post about it and guess which one I went with. (I’m a sucker for hurt/comfort found family shit dON’T JUDGE ME) I should point out, none of this is supposed to reflect the crew’s actual situations growing up. I know for the most part their families are great and cool people and I don’t mean any disrespect to them by writing this!! Just imagine that any and all family members are basically OC’s.

Also I sort of thought all of this up through short pieces of self-indulgent writing so this is all sort of based around a fic??? So any situational bits like that you can change or ignore if you want. I aint some gatekeeper my dudes.

ANYWAYS, with disclaimers and such out of the way, headcanons??? Headcanons

(Put under a read more because this is gonna be long af)

Keep reading

ok uh. yooran gaming channel au - part 2

@misfireezreal reblogged the ‘yoosung has a gaming channel au’ post and wrote a really cute lil addition that inspired me to add some more ideas to this mess of an au….. and i got really carried away

their addition / reblog post is here !!  tho i’ll also put a screenshot of it under the cut… along with more headcanons/ideas/whatever for the au/scenario

Keep reading

Help (Harry)

Requested?: Yes, Thank You
Warnings?: Smut
Pairing: Harry and Reader

_________________________________________

Y/N POV

I recently received a text from my boyfriend, Harry, saying that he has broken his wrist. I’m not surprised that he did, if I’m being honest. I mean the kid jumps off his roof for fun.

That is precisely how he broke it. He was filming a video, where he was jumping off his roof into cardboard boxes. If you ask me, that has broken bones written all over it. Harry doesn’t care though, its like he has no fear. I tell him all the time that he is going to get hurt, or possibly kill himself, but he wont listen.

This entire week, I have been back home in America, to visit family. Also to finish closing out the sell on my old place, since I’m now going to be living with Harry in London.

The entire time I’m gone, all I’ve gotten are these needy texts from him. I try to ignore them, knowing that he’s just trying to get me all bothered so I will come home sooner, but it will not work. No matter how needy and risqué the texts get.

Finally though, the plane I am in, touches down in London, England.

Picking my bag up from baggage claim, I set out to find my boyfriend. Who had better not forgot about me again, like he did last time.

Just as I start to think that he has forgotten, I see him coming towards me. A blue cast on his arm, causing me to stifle a laugh.

“Oh, don’t laugh at me.” He says, finally making it over to me

“Hard not to. Especially when you’ve got a cast from doing something I told you would put you in one.”

“Shut up and come here.” He says, pulling me into a hug

I smile and hug him back, taking in his scent. Something that I grew to love and miss over the last week.

“Let’s get you home. I’m sure that you’re tired from your flight.” He says, grabbing my hand with his good one.

I offered to drive, that way he’s not driving with only one.

The entire way home, Harry had been very touchy. Keeping his hand on my thigh, moving it up and down. Pulling my hand up to his mouth, kissing the back of it, before placing his back on my thigh.

Finally we arrive at the flat, that we now share together, along with the two Cal’s. I take notice that they are not here, leaving just Harry and myself.

“Babe.” Harry says, wrapping his arms around my waist “You never answered any of my texts that I sent you.”

“I answered them.” I say, unwrapping his arms and then walking into the bedroom.

“Not all of them.” He says following me “Not the ones I really wanted you too.”

“Harry,” I say, turning to face him “Half the time I couldn’t answer those. I was with family.”

“But I really needed you Y/N. Since I broke my wrist I could barely do anything.”

“That’s not my fault.” I say, pulling out a fresh set of clothing “I keep telling you not to jump off your roof. That something is going to happen to you one day.”

“I know, but I couldn’t even wank, while you were gone.” He whines

“Again, not my fault.” I say, heading for the en suite. “I’m going to take a shower. No you’re not joining me. I’ll be out shortly.”

He whines, like a little kid when I tell him that he cant join me. Going over to his desk chair, he sits down and slouches in it, almost like he’s pouting.

“Maybe once I’m out. I can help you out a little.” I say, winking at him, before stepping into the bathroom.

Stepping out of the shower, I definitely felt more relaxed. I’ve always hated long flights.

Now its time to go see, if my boyfriend still wants some help.

I walk out of the bathroom, and look around, expecting Harry to still be in the room.

“Harry?” I call out, when I see he’s not in the room

I get no response. Instead I am pushed up against the wall, with a pair of lips against mine.

“Y/N, please help me.” He whispers, almost whining

“Okay, I will. But only because you are being so needy.”

I then take his hand and lead him over to the bed. Pushing him down on the bed, I crawl on top of him. Connecting our lips again. This time in a more needy and passionate way.

Slowly I make my way down. Pulling his shirt off and discarding it somewhere on the floor. I plant small kisses from his collarbones all the way down to the top of his sweatpants he has on.

I look up at him, only to see his eyes are locked on me, watching my every move.

I pull down his sweatpants, along with his boxers, revealing his hardened member. I hear him let out a soft hiss, as the cold air touches him. I can almost hear the need in his breathing. You can tell its been almost a week, since he’s had any pleasure.

I then gently take him into my hands, moving them at a slow pace.

“Y/N, please.” He stutters out. “Please no teasing.”

I look up at him and nod. Now wrapping my lips around just the tip, circling it with my tongue. This causes him to let out a quite erotic moan. Which only spurs me on.

“S-Stop.” HE stutters out, after a while, using his one good hand, to pull me away

I remove myself from him, making a small pop in the process

“Did I do something wrong?” I ask, sitting up

He shakes his head “No, but you know the drill. I will not cum before you.”

“But Harry. There’s no way you can hold yourself up.”

“That’s why you are going to be on top this time.”

My eyes widen. That is something that we have never done before. Mostly because he is my first, so I didn’t know what I was doing.

“Harry, I don’t…” I trail off

“You’ll be fine. I’ll help you the best I can.”

I slowly take off all my clothing, as he grabs a condom, from the bedside table. I take it from him and roll it onto him, seeing he was having trouble.

I then position myself overtop of him. I place on hand on his chest, for support. Using the other one to guide him into me, as I slowly sink down. We both let out a loud moan at this feeling. It being something completely new, but it felt amazing.

Soon I found a steady pace, with the help from Harry and his one good hand. He’s trying to keep himself from jerking his hips upwards too hard, making sure that I am fine.

The both of us are now letting out breathy moans as we are both close to our release. I start to chant out his name, as his uses his good hand to rub figure eights on my clit.

Once both of us have reached our climax. I climb off of him, cuddling next to him on the bed.

“Please do not ever go away for that long again. Especially when I cant do anything for myself.” He says, wrapping his arms around me.

“I promise.” I say, closing my eyes.

Soon the both of us are asleep. Happy to be back in each other’s arms. Well that and from being tired from the night’s activities.

Challenge him

Lin Manuel Miranda x reader

Summary: Reader shares a Birthday with Lin. They dare Lin to accept a challenge after a twitter war.

Warnings: none

Word count: 1171


Happy Birthday to the genius thanks to whom I can do what I do. Love you @.Lin_Manuel, thanks for everything!

You tweeted and lay back down on the couch. Your phone was buzzing from time to time with people wishing you well.

Yes, you shared a Birthday with Lin. You played Angelica Schuyler in NY and though Lin had left before you started, you had gotten to know hin during his monthly visits at the theatre. The two of you had slowly developed a friendship, and you still couldn’t believe your luck to know such an amazing person. He was brilliant - when you first met him all you could think was: how lucky you are to be alive right now.

Suddenly your phone started buzzing like crazy. You quickly unlocked it and immediately saw multiple notifications from Twitter. Lin had tweeted to you.

Happy Birthday right back at u! Love u too, remember, today is all about you no matter how famous I am ;)

He attached a picture of you two, but with a moustache edited onto your face. You squared your jaw, smirking. This meant war. You tweeted:

Cheers to the Birthday boy!

And sent a photo of him sleeping on the stage. You had a lot of fun with the stickers options and decided to give him a pink wig and huge eyebrows.

This went on for sometime - neither of you were going to cave in first. Since he had a bigger fanbase, he had a lot of ammunition from his fans. You were just editing a funny speech bubble when you got a text.

From: Daveed

Yo why is Lin asking for photos of you?

You read the text and growled.

To: Daveed

Don’t send him anything


To: Lin

Hey play fair you cant ask Daveed for help.


To: Daveed

If you send him one of those photos I know you have then youre dead Diggs.


From: Daveed

To late.


You frantically opened Twitter and breathed a sigh of relief when you weren’t met with more embarrassing photos of you. Lin was doing a live.

“Hey guys, yeah send in everything you have on (Y/N).” So this was how he was going to play, huh? As you were watching him talk you dialed his number. You saw his phone ring in the video. “Oh shit it’s her. Should I answer it?” Apparantly his fams told him to do so. 

“Lin!” You shouted into your phone and he winced.

“Happy Birthday!” He said with fake enthusiasm and made a face into the camera.

“Put me on speaker.” He did so with a sour face. You adressed his fans.

“Hey guys. It’s this nerd’s Birthday. I have an idea how to celebrate it. I’m sure he loves you all very much so he won’t back out. You guys give him a challenge, any reasonable challenge. Lin - I dare you to do it.” Lin’s eyes widened. He knew his fans were slightly crazy at times.

He whispered: “Oh fuck” and you smirked.

“Number two: how about I tell you what happened when we went to get coffee with J.K. Rowling…” Lin glared.

“I’ll take the challenge, but no stories please. I had embarrased myself enough that day.” You sighed.

“Okay. Are you in New York Lin? How about I pop in so I can see the challenge? We can give the guys time to think about what they want you to do till then.”

“Since I can’t back out, sure, come witness my humiliation.”

“See you guys in ten minutes!” You said and disconnected. You watched for a moment as Lin begged his fans not to give him bad challenges and grabbed your keys.

You arrived at Lin’s house. You had been there a couple times before, but there had always been a group of people with you. Now that the emotions died down, you started to doubt yourself. You quickly knocked on the door.

Lin opened and immediately swept you into a hug.

“Happy Birthday!” He said and you smiled back at him.

“Ditto.”

You made your way to the living room and he sighed. “I can’t put this off, can I? Maybe if I buy you cookies or something?” You shook your head.

“Nah. You were asking for it when you started the photo war.” You sat down on the couch and made yourself comfortable. He plopped down beside you.

“Let’s do it then.” He took out his phone and started a new live stream. “ Hi, this is me and (Y/N) again,” you waved, “and you know why we’re here. So go ahead and send me challenges, just please don’t be too cruel. I’m gonna pick one and do whatever you want me to.” He blocked the phonescreen from your view as you craned your neck to see what the people were writing. “It will be a surprise for you.” He said with a wink. Comments came immediately and as he read them, his face grew conflicted.

“What is it?” You asked and his eyes flickered to yours.

“Most people want one of two things. I dont know which one to do.” He looked hesitant and you could only imagine what the fans wanted from him.

“Do both of them.” He raised his eyebrows.

“You sure?” You laughed.

“Yeah I’m sure. More laughs for me.”

“Okay then.” He turned to the camera. “Here it is, the two things you guys are screaming for me to do.” He faced you and you waited, excited for what was to come. Would he dance some weird dance? Sing a song? Call Daveed and proclaim his undying love for him?

Lin’s eyes didn’t leave yours as he moved closer until he was just centimeters from your face. His gaze flickered to your lip and you froze. Suddenly he was kissing you. He put his hand on your neck and moved your head to a better angle as he moved his lips against you. The kiss was gentle - perfect. After the initial shock you responded and he smiled into your lips. Eventually you parted, needing air. He looked at you softly, his hand moving to your arm.

“That was number one.”

“What’s number two?” You breathed and he entwined your fingers with his. He looked down at your joined hands hesitantly and you gave him a reassuring squeeze. His gaze returned to your eyes.

“(Y/N), will you go out with me?”

“Yes.” You said and he grinned widely.

“That could have ended bad.” He chuckled and you gave him a peck on the lips. You turned to the camera and saw a multitude of comments coming in, fans screaming about what happened.

“Since I need a moment to compose myself, that will be all from me for today.” You told them. “Bye!” You got up and headed towards the kitchen.

“I’ll make coffee, you finish up with these guys.” You whispered to Lin and nodded. He turned to his fans.

“So that happened.” He said with a lopsided grin.


Please let me know what you think! This is a new blog so I’d love to know what content you guys want to see!

MASTERLIST

I came across this letter written by Jeff Mangum about why he stopped performing with Neutral Milk Hotel.  I found it really beautiful, so I thought I would share.

“i think its time that i made a few things clear.
first of all, i am not in hiding, as some have said. where i am i supposed to be hiding?
behind the coach? in the cat box? under the bed?

i wake up everyday, i walk out into the world and i say hello to the people i meet.
the sun shines, the birds sing, the dogs birth out of the old womans eyeball, the
afterbirth overwhelms me, swimming with strange creatures, etc. living in the great mystery
is enough for me right now.
also it has been said that i dont like people listening
to my music, that i dont like playing live, that i stopped playing because people heckled
me at my shows, called me names, etc. if you really think im that pathetic, then you should
burn my records, and forget about me. but its not like that. not that i thought every aspect
of being in a semi popular
rock band was totally healthy, but im not knocking it either. but when i hear people bitching about
being famous, i always wonder why they keep doing it. if you dont like doing interviews
anymore, then dont. its that easy.
but anyway, im getting off track here. what happened to me
comes down to two things.


1.immune system breakdown. i was getting sick every two months for a year, and finally in
the spring of 99 i got hepatitis and mono at the same time, which turned me into
a vomit tornado with yellow eyeballs for two months, and gave me chronic fatigue for the next
two years. which led to number two.
2.spiritual breakdown. this little nervous breakdown, which lasted about two years, was
one of the best things that ever happened to me. it turned out great in the end, even though
it was a living hell for a long time.
in our society, we are supposed to feel ashamed of ourselves when we breakdown,
were supposed to go to the shrink to “fix” the “problem”,
so that we can come out as smiling productive members of society.
what a load of crap.
we must live in the loneliest society on earth, one that has taken the spiritual
aspect out of becoming a healthy person.
in other cultures, spirituality, human
phycology, physical health and meditation are all one thing. you cant separate them into
compartments. i didnt know any of this a few years ago, and my breakdown forced me
to begin to see through the horrible mental boxes that our society imposes on everyone.
two years ago i was a mess, every belief i had was disintegrating, everything
i had based my life on seemed shaky. i was tired, confused, and i just didnt think
i could simply sing my way out of it this time. and i was right. the songs i did write
were confused, very dark and not anything i thought anyone needed to hear. they were
more for myself, to help me to work through my mental problems. so, doing shows seemed
inappropriate, since anything i would sing would instantly end up on the net, for
everyone to hear. im not knocking people sharing my music on the internet, but
at that point, it didnt seem right.

so where am i at now? well, all my belongings are in storage, and i am leaving for spain in a
week. dont know whats going to happen. life is better that way. my attitude has always been
to remain open to all possibilities. maybe i’ll write a song, a story, a tape piece,
learn meditation, capture a beautiful event on tape, make a friend, see something i’ve
never seen before. and if at some point, if it all adds up to be something worth
releasing to the world, i will do it gladly. i dont give a fuck if it
“tops aeroplane” or not. thats just another mental prison. anyone waiting for an album
to top the last one should look somewhere else, because you’ll inevitably be disappointed.


when i wrote aeroplane, i spent 90 percent of my time screaming nonsence
into my little tape recorder, or chopping up sounds with my sound blender, or
just making noise,
and 10 percent of my time writing songs. it was very liberating,
because i never thought about what i was doing, and a week before we went to record i didnt
even think we had a half finished album. but i didnt care. i figured if we went the studio,
and only recorded one finished song, then that would be fine. creating just one minute of
something inspiring is an incredibly fun thing to do. so next time you hear that neutral milk
is recording, dont get your hopes up. it may only be one minute of music.
and if i ever release my korena pang peices for you to
hear, you’ll soon find that
its just liberated dada to free the mind. if you want more neutral milk, dont buy it.
you’ll hate it. i for one love music that makes my brain freeze, like the shags, or art ensemble
or maybe some chanting and
banging and confusion from bolivia that makes me forget myself for awhile.
major organ was just a bunch of friends putting music together for fun. it was a project
that changed hands at least a dozen times, and most of the time you didnt even know who was working on it,and you never knew where it would go.
released mostly to inspire other dreamers and home recorders to do the same with there friends.
we weren’t trying to create a masterpiece. trying to do anything is the of death of creativity,
and if we can encourage people to not try, but to just do, then we have accomplished our goal.
the jittery joes show should be out in august or september. it was a show i did in 98 before going
to denver to record. i think the video footage makes it worthy of release, since lance bangs
did such a good job. we’re putting it out to encourage people to stop paying alot of money
for second generation live shows. but again, dont get your hopes up. its really not a big deal.

so thats it. thanks to everyone for listening to my music. now i need to forget myself again,
so you may not hear from me for awhile. forgetting yourself is freedom, and i need to be free.
happy travels. jeff”

StevenBomb 6 [ Heavy Spoiler Warning]

First, if you have watched the leaked videos, please try to watch them on TV when officially come out or on the CN app. Support the show. Please.


This is the edited version with the keep reading line so as not to accidentally spoil anyone who has yet to watch the Bomb or does not plan to watch until the May 8th (The Keep Reading/Read More is having trouble please let me know if it shows up)


Keep reading

VLD MAGICAL GIRLS AU!!

So I had a weird idea one day in a McDonalds so i decided to write all of it down (im going to draw content for it later on 👌👌🔥🔥)

Heads up if you’re uncomfortable with cisswap AUs because this AU is definitely one
(and unnecessary cursing im sorry i have no filter)

Keep reading

The East Wind - Sherlock Holmes

A/n- Okay I want to do a part 2 but please let me know if you want me tooooo!!!

———–

You were sitting in the hectic flat reading a book that you had been very interested in. It was peaceful in 221b for once and you took advantage of that. Sherlock and John were on a case and Mrs Hudson was downstairs cleaning. The silence was almost like music to your ears. That was until, you had a little visit…

“Hello Y/N…” the man mumbled. You immediately knew who it was.

“Mycroft. How can I help you?” You asked arising from Sherlocks black leather arm chair and turning towards the tall man. You had known Mycroft for quite a while, longer then Sherlock actually! You used to work with Mycroft full time, but now he only asks for you when necessary.

“I need you to follow me, I have someone that would like to meet you.. if it was down to me you wouldn’t be going but unfortunately, we promised her this.”

You could tell by the worry on his face that he meant what he had said. But you agreed and placed your book down on the arm of Sherlocks chair and grabbed your coat. You followed Mycroft to the car and got in.

“What’s going on Mycroft? What am I about to get myself into?” You asked, a little worry evident in your voice. Mycroft turned to face you and stated for a bit before giving you your answer.

“Honestly Y/N, i’m not to sure…” you took that as a good idea to message your flat mate and best friend.

“Sherlock, your brother has asked me to help him with something, i’ll be back soon! Don’t annoy anyone to much ;) - Y/N”

You smiled at yourself and pressed send before putting your phone in your pocket and relaxing into the leather seats.

You finally arrived at where ever it was that you were and Mycroft took you down to a room. He opened the door and you saw a women standing with her back facing the grey wall in front of her with her back to the glass in front of you. You looked up at Mycroft when he spoke.

“Eurus, you have your visitor, do play nice” he said before turning to you. “I’ll be right outside, if anything happens use this card and get out of here” you nodded and smiled slightly at the Holmes brother.

“Hello Y/N… i’ve been waiting to meet you for a long time… the girl that my brother has fallen for…” she turned round to fave you and edged closer to the door. “Im Eurus. Stupid name really it means the east wind…”

You took a step forward towards the glass, a little confused you were about to ask what she meant by her brother falling for you, but she was already answering that question.

“Oh Y/N… Sherlock Holmes is head over heels for you… I’ve seen it!” This confused you…

“How have you seen it Eurus? Your in here… you cant get out…” you questioned.

“Oh please y/n… what if I was to say… Big Brothers watching you?” She stated in a thick accent. You gasped as you realised thats what she had said to Sherlock when the three of you had been out in London.

“Faith? But how did you… I mean… what?” You asked completely puzzled and unsure.

“Might want to answer Sherlocks text Y/N, wouldn’t want him getting worried. I just wanted to meet you before my plan is all. I look forward to seeing you again very shortly. Good bye Y/N” she sung the last few words and turned around again before you left. As you stepped out of the room Mycroft looked at you unsure of what had happened. You ignored him and pulled out your phone. 3 missed calls and 3 new messages.

“Y/N, where are you going? - SH”
“Where is Mycroft taking you? - SH”
“Sherlock’s in hospital, he freaked out big time.. come ASAP - JW”

The last one caused worry to tingle through your body. “Mycroft we need to go to the hospital now!” You screamed

“Y/N? Whats wrong?”

“NOW MYCROFT!” You shouted before picking up pace.

Mycroft dropped you at the hospital before driving away again. You ran up the stairs and found John trying to get into a room which you guessed was Sherlock’s. At long last he managed to get in and you followed behind. You gasped at the sight. Your best friend in a hospital bed in an awful state and Culverton Smith next to him. You was to worried about Sherlock to notice what was going on. The next thing you knew, Smith was gone. You looked at Sherlock as if to ask what was going on but he just grabbed your hand in response.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here Sherlock…” you sighed. He just squeezed your hand and said he would explain everything when he was out.

And he did. He showed you the video Mary left for him. You began to get teary and sat down on the arm of Sherlocks chair at the sight of seeing Mary again. He walked over to you and hugged you, before changing the subject.

“Where did Mycroft take you?” He asked.

“I met the east wind…” you hummed before walking into the kitchen.

“Tea?” You asked the detective before grabbing two cups thinking nothing of Eurus ever again. Or so you thought…