i cant handle all these feelings in my chest

it’s really cool looking back and seeing how much ive improved ever since i started uni..especially this semester i can tell that all the work ive put into myself during therapy is paying off? like ive been talking to a lot of people lately and making new friends! i can make small talk w strangers and handle criticism a lot better too..when i think of this stuff i feel so proud of myself but im still sad all the time? i keep saying i cant wait to get better but the thing is i already am getting better and its unrealistic for me to make ‘never being sad again’ my end goal bc thats just impossible…anyways long story short my chest feels so tight rn bc im fucken depressed

Five stages of grief for lexa

Denial:
Lexa is not truly dead the chip in her neck gave her instant access to the city of light everything that just happened was a lie its not real its not real its not real-

Anger:
How could jason do this; how could he kill off one of the only gay representatives on this show? How could he do this to all of us after everything thats happened in the queer realm of tv shows-

Sadness:
I cant believe shes gone my small heart cant take it what is this feeling in my chest i cant breath there r tears everywhere just why-

Worry:
But what will happen to clarke how is she going to handle this i cant even imagine what my little baby must be going through she loves lexa so much and shes lost so much i just dont want to see her fall-

Death:
My heart shattered.