i cannot with your perfect face

3

hi hello CATS!!!! CANNOT!!!! BE VEGAN!!!!!

i cannot believe i have to fucking say this.

dogs are omnivore and IF YOUR VET APPROVES your pooch MAY be able to go on an APPROVED(!!!!!) commercial vegan dog food like the brand “v-dog” which has all the essential vitamins, protein, etc. (the oldest record winning dogs have been vegan)

cats are CARNIVORE and cannot fucking live on a vegan diet. a vet would laugh in your face and probably find some way to have your pet taken away from you because you’re obviously not fit to have an animal if you think you can feed a cat a diet based on your own ethics

i’m vegan but this is so fucking harmful.

it’s about minimizing your harm, not putting your animals on risky diets in an attempt to be perfect.

DON’T FUCKING DO THIS TO YOUR PETS

2

Day 2

Imagine Sherlock Not Being Able To See Your Imperfections

For My Followers (I just binged the whole show and OMG)

It was a simple process really, well to you anyway.

You always put a face mask and curlers on before going to bed.

You always wake up an hour early to wash your face, bathe, shave, do your hair, apply makeup, and find the perfect outfit.

Once all that’s done you check yourself in the mirror and assure you look flawless. Every hair must be in place, your lipstick cannot be smudged, your clothes can’t be wrinkled, and your shoes can’t be scuffed.

It all has to be perfect.

It has to be perfect for him, you can’t let him see your flaws.

He is Sherlock Holmes and he sees every misstep, stain, and the tiniest of hairs stuck to your shirts.

Ever since you met him you’ve wanted to be perfect, so he would think better of you.

Even now when you’ve been romantic partners for a year you still keep your routine and never let him see you compromised.

It’s difficult of course considering you live together and your jobs can have odd hours and compromising situations but you’ve managed this long.

~~~

“John I really don’t think going after this guy is smart,” you say into the phone as you walk down the block towards Baker Street. “You say he’s dangerous and arguably the most powerful man in the world?”

“Yes.”

“Worse than Moriarty?”

“Yes dammit he’s got information on everyone it seems. Especially Mary he has bad blackmail on her.” You hiss and bite your lip as you walk. Your heels click against the pavement and drown out the sound of quiet footsteps behind you.

“Alright we’ll take him down then. Don’t worry John, you Sherlock, and I have made it this far,” you assure and smile. Jim sighs and you imagine he’s making that adorable frustrated face he does.

“Okay (Y/N).”

“Good n-” a black cloth goes over your eyes making you yell out in surprise and slam your elbow back. Your attacker grunts and you rip the cloth away just as he pulls a gun. Your hands fly up automatically and you drop the phone.

The attacker smiles and you scowl.

“Are we really doing this on a public street?” you huff.

“Tell Sherlock this is his final warning and he better back off,” the man growls out.

“How about you tell Magnussen he better watch his back,” you fire back. The man chuckles and suddenly a loud bang rattles in your ears.

At first you feel nothing and then pain explodes in your stomach. Your eyes slowly look down to find a small spot of red forming on your shirt. When you look back up in awe the man is gone.

“Oh my gosh,” you utter and carefully press a hand to your wound. You’re too shocked to be in too much pain but your legs do give out beneath you. You weakly grab at air as you hit the ground on your back with a thud. The air rushes from your lungs as you’re left gasping on the ground.

In all your time working with Sherlock you’ve never been injured this bad before so this comes at a shock.

Somehow you’ve always managed to deal with all your injuries by yourself. You’d either path yourself up or you’d steal away to the hospital alone. Sherlock has never seen you injured and you’re not about to let that happen now.

Gritting your teeth you press a hand to the wound and press applying pressure. You have to stop the bleeding first and foremost. Using your other hand you push yourself up all while groaning in pain. Using your high heels you dig them into the ground and shove yourself back against a fence.

“This is bad,” you mutter to yourself as you tear open your shirt to see the wound. It is agony as you press into the wound with your hand. Desperately you grab your phone with your free hand to find it’s been crushed.

No way to call for help and no one on the streets in sight.

Baker Street is still more than a block away you’re not sure you can make it. But you have to try.

Tears start to spill from your eyes as you use the wall to pull yourself up. Once on your feet you lean on the wall breathing heavily. Your high heels are not helping so you kick them off and start staggering towards home.

Each step is agony so you barely make it a yard before collapsing to the ground.

Laying on the ground with your blood pooling around you, you take a deep breath and let your eyes close. Exhaustion is weighing on you and the pain is becoming numb.

You aren’t making it out of this.

“I love you Sherlock,” you whisper before the darkness closes in.

~~~

“Miss? Miss can you hear me?”

The voice coupled with repetitive beeping brings you to consciousness.

Opening your eyes you flinch at the bright lights ten fixate on the smiling nurse beside you.

That’s when you realize you’re in a hospital, you didn’t die.

“I should be dead,” you croak.

“Aw miss don’t say that. The doctors here are very good and a friendly stranger brought you in just in time,” the nurse replies cheerily.

“I was shot point blank in the stomach,” you deadpan. “If I didn’t die there has to be some catch.” Her face falls and she bites her lip.

“I’m really sorry to tell you this but there is a problem-”

“What?” you hiss.

“You won’t be able to have children and there is a very nasty scar.”

And just like that you were no longer perfect.

Tears started pouring down your cheeks and your body started shaking.

The nurse tried to comfort you but you shoved her away.

And you were left alone to cry and mourn.

You aren’t perfect, he’ll notice, he’ll see.

~~~

“(Y/N)?” It’s John, he’s the only one you allow to visit you in the hospital. When the nurse asked you names of people who are cleared to see you, you only said John.

“Hello,” you greet and slowly sit up wincing as you jostle your wound.

“(Y/N), I’m really happy you’re okay and it’s good to see you but Sherlock is desperate to see you,” John says. You knew this would be the first thing he’d say.

“No he cannot see me right now. John I’m a mess right now,” you reply sternly.

“(Y/N) Sherlock loves you and he’s worried sick. Please (Y/N),” John pleads and your resolve wavers. “He loves you, he doesn’t care how you look.”

“See that is where you’re wrong. He has never seen me imperfect ever. I spend hours every day making sure I always look flawless for him. Even when we sleep together I always assure I’m perfect. John I am scarred and imperfect now. I just couldn’t bare it if he said anything.”

After you’re done John looks at you with all this pity on his face and you just sob.

“I have a scar, I can’t have children. John what if he leaves me?” you whimper.

“How could you say that?” The voice makes you freeze and gape.

Sherlock is there.

He’s standing in the doorway looking sad and furious.

“How could you think that? You are still perfect, you have always been perfect. (Y/N) I love you and you will always be perfect to me,” he vows and you cover your face. And then he’s by your side holding you while you cry and petting your flat hair.

“I always thought-”

“You were wrong. (Y/N) I love you and believe it or not I have never seen a flaw in you. Not then and not now.”

Clinging to his shirt you sniffle and look up at him with wet eyes and a tear stained face.

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

(Fun fact I used the Baskerville font on the title!)

The signs as The Princess Bride quotes

Aries: I’ll explain and I’ll use small words so that you’ll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon.

Taurus: As you wish.

Gemini: Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Cancer: Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while.

Leo: You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept.

Virgo: I would sooner destroy a stained glass window than an artist like yourself.

Libra: There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.

Scorpio: Is very strange. I have been in the revenge business so long, now that it’s over, I don’t know what to do with the rest of my life.

Sagittarius: Well, I’m not saying I’d like to build a summer home here, but the trees are actually quite lovely.

Capricorn: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

Aquarius: I’m not a witch, I’m your wife. But after what you just said, I’m not even sure I want to be that any more.

Pisces: Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder today. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam..

I just really REALLY love Lafayette’s letters to Washington. I mean - you can feel Lafayette fangirling so much. And his way of writing “goodbye” is just perfect:

Adieu, My Most Beloved General, Be pleased to present My Best Respects to Mrs Washington, Mrs Stuart, Your Respected Mother, all your family. Remember me to George, the Young ones, and all friends. let your Affectionate Recollecton, and fatherly Blessing often Attend Your absent, Your dearest, and Most devoted friend, and let your Heart judge What I so Warmly feel, and Cannot Sufficiently Express, that With Every Sentiment of Affection, Respect, and Gratitude I am My Great and Good General till the last throb of My Heart Your Loving friend and affet. Servt - lafayette


I would love to see Washington’s face when he was reading this

Your lips against mine is the most peaceful thing I have ever encountered. Your hands on my face and back is the most beautiful feeling I have ever felt. You make me feel warm. The effect that your touch has on me, is the same effect the sun has on the earth after a hurricane, or a cold night. I will long for your touch every evening, and every day until I’m with you again. That hour cannot come soon enough.
—  E.H
The Signs As “The Princess Bride” Quotes

Aries: “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”

Taurus:  “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”

Gemini: “Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you in the morning.”

Cancer: “As you wish”

Leo: “ It’s not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don’t even exercise.”

Virgo: “ You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.”

Libra: “ There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.”

Scorpio:  “You be careful. People in masks cannot be trusted.”

Sagittarius:   “I’ll explain and I’ll use small words so that you’ll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon.“

Capricorn:  “ I’m not a witch, I’m your wife. But after what you just said, I’m not even sure I want to be that any more”

Aquarius: “Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday.”  

Pisces: “rest well and dream of large women”

﹄ verse names pt. 1 ﹃

Tags that you can use for your verses, sorted out into different sections. Lyrics from my “Musical Yeater” playlist on Spotify, “Coloring Book” by Chance the Rapper, and a little bit of my “aprol showurs” playlist on Spotify. I’ll probably do more when I feel like it because I only got like 4 songs into aprol showurs.

Keep reading

when I was younger I had an argument with one of my therapists

“you listen with your whole body” she told us

“no, you only listen with your ears. ears are the only part of your body that hear things”

“no, you listen with your whole body! for example, you listen to my face with your eyes”

“no, I look at your face with my eyes. eyes cannot hear”

my therapist turned her back to me and started waving her body around. “am I listening to you?” she asked

“yes.” I said. I knew if said no I might as well be swearing in blood that I would sit still for the rest of my life

“no, I am not listening to you!” said the therapist. that was becoming evident. the therapist turned around and faced me, put her hands in her lap, and looked at my face. “am I listening to you now?”

“maybe” I said

“yes, I am! I am listening to you with my whole body! you listen with your whole body, not just with your ears!”

I thought for a moment. “… you don’t listen with your toes.”

“yes, you do!” said my therapist. and that was how I learned that if your toes are not pointed at the person you are listening to you cannot hear what they are saying, a fact which, I have discovered, is not true.

When the actors fell ill for your commercial, your first instinct was to ask Sam and Dean if they could star in it - purely out of desperation- , however, you were soon starting to regret your decision after the 50th take.

“CUT!"You yelled, groaning at the 51th take and you could tell that everyone else was starting to frustrated at the boys acting skills."Sam, Dean, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“What did we do wrong now? I thought that take was perfect,"Dean told you, Sam nodding in agreement.

"Far from perfect, trust me. Dean, there is a script, stick to it. You are not Batman, sadly, you are Dean Winchester who cannot act if his life depended on it,"You told him and when you heard Sam snickering, you faced him."You’re no better. This is a shampoo commercial, not whatever the hell you are doing. AGAIN.”

Workout:

You loved working out; it felt amazing. Heightened senses, heart racing, blood pumping. You loved it. Ever since you were little hitting a punch bag was the height of your day. So, once you had moved into Avengers towers and found out there was a gym; you couldn’t wait to get in there and train. Of course SHIELD wanted you to be in perfect fighting shape, so had given you the best mentor they could, Pietro.

“Arms up Y/n, come on!” Pietro chuckled hitting you flat in the face, “How am I supposed to let you train with the bots if you cannot handle me” he exclaimed putting his hands down and taking a drink of water.  “Let me at the bots, please, let me try” you pleaded stepping closer and looking into his smug eyes. “Fine y/n, but we better have Helen Cho on speed dial with her cradle.” He joked guiding you over to the small arena where the bots were kept. “Hit the red button and they stop okay?” he asked checking you were up to date with how to get out in an emergency, sure part of him wanted to see you fail, but he didn’t want to see you get hurt.

Walking in a wave of anxiety hit you but as soon as the first bot came out you kicked it in the chest and it shattered earning a “Shit” from Pietro in your earpiece. “Told you!” you strained out punching and kicking your way through the bots ducking as they fired at you. Punch, kick, duck, kick, you tore apart the bots, earning constant curses from Pietro who was shocked by your moves.

Soon enough, Pietro pulled you out, congratulating you on your skills. “Wow y/n I was wrong about you.” He began placing his hand on your face tipping it up slightly to look into his gleaming eyes. “I wonder what else I don’t know about you” he smirked before crashing his lips onto yours as you tangled your fingers into his hair on the back of his neck. Pulling away you glanced at the clock, “Darn, our session is over for today. We’ll pick this up tomorrow yes?” you smirked as Pietro grabbed you hand and spun you back around towards him. “Erm no Princess, I don’t know where you think you’re going.”

1,000 FOLLOWERS!!!!1

Well, more than that now, but I haven’t gotten to sit down and try to do something for it yet, SO HERE IT IS!!!!

I cannot put into words how grateful I am fore each and every single one of you. You make my day, you put a smile on my face, your undying support and loyalty is like no other! I am so thankful for your feedback and your input, I love you all so very dearly, and I am so thankful for all of you. <3333

NOW ONTO THE GOOD STUFF!!!


Top Followers:

These people are the most awesome greatest ever and you should DEFINTELY give them a follow and show them some looooovvveeee!!!!

fanfictionloverblog

tolaughistolobe

dcmigod-heroes

unitedglory876

jensensfreckleddick

angels-demons-ghosts-ohmy

indelible-wishes

jemin-guay

damn-those-winchesters

thestarlighthangingtree


Favorite Imagines/Fiction/perfect people blogs:

These authors work their asses off to give you some damn good shit. Go give them a follow, appreciate their brilliance! LOVE THEM AS MUCH AS I DO!!! Some of them are imagines, some are fics, some are Meta’s no matter what they do they all kick some serious ass.

kaz2y5-imagines

applepie-imagines

thenewmrsweasley

sincerelysaraahh

abaddonwithyall

ilostmyshoe-79

howyoumetthewinchesters

samtomydeanwinchester

spnimaginesblog

spnimaginesgalore

i-write-supernatural-imagines

spnimpalaimagines

huntertales

myspnstory

themegalosaurus

semirahrose


MY MASTERLIST 

Has not been updated in a hot minute, I’ll get to it eventually.


Fan Fiction

Hunted- ReaderxSam, ReaderxDean
-The Reader is a smart, and savvy hunter, but when a monster of a different variety threatens her well-being, she is left unsure of what to do, or how to cope.-
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9
*Warnings: Swearing, Stalking, Sexual Assault, Violence, Abuse, Smut NSFW, Oral Sex, Unprotected Sex
____________________________________________________________

Silent Scream- SamxReader, DeanxReader, Lucifer!SamxReader
-Lucifer has his true vessel, and a perverse fascination with the Reader, is there any way to get him out of her head?-

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10
*Warnings: Abuse, Swearing, Mild gore, Mild Smut, NSFW
____________________________________________________________

Guardian- ReaderxDean
-She was and Angel sent to him when he was a child, charged to protect him, eventually he didn’t need her anymore forgetting her existence, his increasingly risky lifestyle wreaking havoc on her as she struggles to make him see her.-
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9
*Warnings:  Swearing, Mild Gore, Death,




Oneshots

Rejection (Request)
DeanxReader, SamxReader

-The Reader confesses her feelings for Dean who turns her down, Sam finds her and comforts her, and she realizes that it should have been him all along-

Found (Request)
DeanxReader

-The Reader is injured on a hunt and is found by Sheriff Jody Mills, who takes care of her, and calls the Boys, they take the Reader with them once she heals.-

Holy Matrimony (Request) (NSFW)
SamxReader

-The Reader and Sam pose as an engaged couple to investigate a haunting at a Wedding Venue. Sam teases her the entire time, and once they get back to their room, they get hot and heavy.-

A ma grande surprise (Request)
BalthazarxReader

-After much begging, Balthazar finally takes the Reader out on a real date, and it’s a night to remember.-

The Pick-up (Request)
GabrielxReader

-Gabriel and the Reader challenge each other to a game of Pick-Up lines, only to drop a confession-

8 Ball (Request) (NSFW)
Deanxreader

-The Reader closes down a bar, but Dean’s not ready to call it a night yet.-

Bumpy Ride (Request) (NSFW-ish)
SamxReader

-The Reader is tired of sitting in the back, but the only spot left is in Sam’s lap.-

Imagine Meeting the Boys in Heaven
DeanxReaderxSam Family

-The Reader sees the boys in Heaven, and it’s a surprise to all of them.-

Inspireds

This is a  dedicated to the brilliantly talented people who have taken my imagines and added their personal writing to it!

If you want to do one make sure to message me, reblog the original, link and tag me in it so that credit goes where it’s due and also so that I can read it and share it as well!


Imagine watching a Thunderstorm with the boys
Sam x Reader x Dean Family dynamic
A sweet fluffy, funny, and cute oneshot about you and Sam just wanting to watch a thunderstorm and have a beer, Dean… not so much
Written by: thenewmrsweasley

Imagine late night drunk conversations in Dean’s bed
Dean x Reader x Sam Family dynamic
Dean and you go back and forth discovering things you never knew about each other, things get a little deep, and extra fluffy, bonus adorbs Sam for the win!
Written by: thenewmrsweasley

Imagine finding an antique locket with a photo of you in it
Dean x Reader (Implied)
You try to find out more about your family tree upon the discovery, but is reminded about the family you already has.
Written by: Applepie-Imagines

Imagine the boys waking up to find that you’d gone
DeanxReader
A heartbreaking perspective as to why you left and what you’re hiding from
Written by: Applepie-Imagines

Imagine finding an antique locket with a photo of you in it
S
amxReaderxDean Friend Dynamic
The past you’ve been running from has finally caught up to you, and you have to explain yourself to the boys, but it’s not at all what they were expecting, and now you have a decision to make.
Written by: thenewmrsweasley

Imagine trying to keep your relationship with Dean a secret from your Dad, Bobby
Reader x Dean
After much sneaking around you and Dean are finally caught and come clean about your relationship to your Dad, Bobby, who after the initial shock gives Dean permission to court you, and something else.
Written by: thenewmrsweasley

Disappointment

Set in the AU where people wake up on their 18th birthday with the first words their soulmate will say to them tattooed on their wrist. Of course, there’s some kinks in this cycle.
Written by: Anonymous
Pairing: Dean x Reader
Warnings: Mild Language

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

Soulless!Sam One-shot

Summary: The reader is still trying to get used to Sam without a soul, and trying to come to terms with any lingering feelings she’d had for the old Sam.
Written by: Anonymous
Pairing: Soulless!Sam x Reader
Word Count:  818
Warnings: Mild Language, innuendos, mention of gore


I Have a butt load of submissions that some of my lovely Anonymous Authors have submitted as well, but I don’t have them listed or organised yet, but these wildly perfect oneshots, or fics can be found in my tags under “submitted” or “ Dean/Sam x reader” “spn oneshot” 

Please don’t forget to leave some feedback for our submitted authors such as:

Anonymous

applepie-imagines

queen-of-hell123

thenewmrsweasley

angels-demons-ghosts-ohmy

AND SO MANY OTHER BRILLIANT PEOPLE I COULDN’T EVEN COMPILE IT INTO ONE LIST!!!! 
THANK YOU ALL SO SO SO SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSO MUCH FOR BEING AMAZING!

Reading Carry On by Rainbow Rowell feels like eating your favourite food after craving it for a long time and eating it just makes you feels so good and you’re so happy and you just cannot stop shoving it right in your face.

“i have found the most beautiful wings on the backs of broken angels,
you are folding back into the shattered faces of crystals and the endless spectrum of color.
you are prisms encased in beauty, 
the unresolved messes scattered crazily in my head,

darling, you dance to the music that is my heartbeat
and thank you for loving even just my breathing,
as to sway, arrange your body just 14 degrees more into perfection.

darling, you are the quinessence of lovely,
the just image of fleeting.
hurricanes line my spine and i hate each of my vertebrae,

i spend time breaking each one trying to fold myself into twisted origami
and sand cannot build castles with the wind and i’ll have you know, i am just
emptiness and dust who sings along with the wind
on nights i want to feel cold
because i do not deserve warmth.

you and i, we break haphazardly, we shatter dangerously,
as if our bodies are broken glass,
and darling we are falling deep into catastrophe,
catastrope is our lifeline, the alarms go off
in our hearts,

back off, tone it down,
but we are church bells ringing, holy silence
deafening, loud music the default to our lives.
we are more spinning, planets revolving and words never ending,

we are more jagged and messy, 
we build each other up as sand cannot build a home with its parts alone.”

—  but we are everything and more || g.l.
3

ENGLISH:
Rukia: Just as I thought
Ichigo: Rukia…
Rukia: I couldn’t sleep either
I can’t help myself of thinking about the day we met
We all have grown up a lot since that day…
Ichigo: …

Rukia: I mean you were always crying around,
First you were crying because you dont wanted to be a shinigami,
then you were crying because you wanted to be a shinigami again,
at the very moment comander kyoraku said
you will not be able to come back to live in the human world again
I knew you would be facing one of the existential crisis of yours…

Ichigo: Did you say I was crying around??

Rukia: buy you know, they cannot tell you what to do…
I mean… if you don’t want to stay here…
you are still a human being…
And Soul society has a huge debt to you.
They cannot forbid us to find a way for you to come back home…
We can always ask Urahara…

Unless you want to stay… because it would be really helpful
You have perfectioned your bankai after all…
And we have lost so many people, I think you fulfill the requirements to be a captain…
just for you to know…

Ichigo: From the day that I’ve recovered my powers
I was thinking that some day I should choose in which world I want to live…
So this did not surprise me after all
but…
how about you? You are being too much kind with me…
I’m starting to think you really want me to stay… Don’t you?

Rukia: I’m being serius! you idiot!

Ichigo: Me too… what do you think? can I fit in your closet?

Rukia: Of course, my closet is bigger and organized than yours.. Nii-sama’s house is huge!

Ichigo: You are right, but I don’t think he would love the idea…
Rukia: I think he secretly likes you…