I’m absolutely in love with this guy. And he loves me too. It seems perfect. Until I recently found out his mom’s been pushing him to break up with me and date a white girl. He comes from a pretty wealthy and traditional family, and they (except his siblings) hate me because of my skin color. I don’t want to end things with him because I genuinely see myself spending the rest of our lives together, but I can’t stand his family always making me feel like shit and him being too scared to defend me
First of all, I’m really sorry that you have to go through this. It’s not something thats easy to deal with & I can’t even begin to imagine how this makes you feel.
This might not be what you want to hear but here Goes:
Your man: Talk to him. I cannot stress enough the importance of communication in this type of situation. He needs to know how you feel. & if he really loves you, he needs to start defending you. In the most respectful way possible of course. Understand that this is his family & though it might be hard for you, I’d argue that its even harder for him. You have a way out of oppression in this situation, he does not. So stand with him in this struggle. & try to love his family even though they aren’t showing you love. In the end, he will see and appreciate your efforts. I say this because its one thing to know that your family is wrong in the way they treat someone, but its entirely another thing when your SO hates your family, & displays it.
The Family: Love them till it hurts. By “them” I am referring to his family. Show them all the reasons you’re an amazing person and that you deserve to be with their son. Even when it seems impossible to love them, remember that you’re doing this for the benefit of your future as well as theirs. Even on the days that they are nasty towards you, turn the other cheek. One day they will come around, & if not (which I believe is unlikely), at least no one can actually say anything bad about you.
Ultimately, y’all two can be the change that his family needs. The racism/discrimination can end with you if you choose to stick it out with him. But that’s entirely up to you.
I say stay. Love. Tough it out. Better the world, unite the people.
Thanks for trusting me with your situation! & I hope this helped. I’ll be praying for you too. Love ya!