i can't with this world anymore

what she says: i’m fine.

what she means: austin carlile just left of mice & men because of his marfan syndrome and he can’t scream anymore and I think I’m gonna cry while listening to restoring force and cold world.

Pouring your heart and soul into someone and then they decide they don’t want you anymore is the worst possible feeling in the world. And when they seem to just move on to someone else like they never even cared about you its hurts more than anything. I am tired of being hurt. I am tired of being used. This is why I have trust issues. When I love I love with all my heart. I don’t have anymore feeling to give anymore. I’m just exhausted and empty. I’m sorry.

I know I’m suppose to be positive about life. I know that. So many people tell me on a daily basis. I know I should put a smile on my face and fight back. I know my problems aren’t the end of the world. But you don’t understand. I’m tired.

I’m tired of looking at my face. I’m tired of not knowing what to do. I’m tired of all the people hurting me, even when they don’t realize they are hurting me.

I’m merely sick and tired.
I feel like such a waste of time, a downgrade, a replaceable, and an empty person.
So instead of standing up and auguring I just sit there silent, I cry until I fall asleep.
I can’t fight back my tears anymore.
I’m sorry I’m not better.
I’m sorry I’m too much to handle.
I’m sorry that I’ve given up.

I feel as if I wasted my whole life to achieve nothing, literally nothing.
I want to find a purpose.
Something to look forward to.
I’m so unhappy and isolated.
For the last 3-4 years I have been so sad.
That sadness has grown inside of me and it’s all I know now. I can’t stop it, I can’t control it. Because even when I’m happy and laughing, it’s seems like it’s still there, just waiting to strike at me and take me down.

I always pretend to be a cold hearted person when in reality I cry about everything, all the time, literally, always crying.

I’ve given up and lost hope. I don’t think I will ever be the girl I used to be. Because of how much my sadness has consumed me, I’m a different person. Walking in large crowds, feeling more lonely than ever. Doing random tasks and only thinking about how much I want to be dead.

Before you go telling me how many people are greatful for me, just think. Did you ever think about the fact that some people just don’t want to live ? 
They have no dramatic reason, they just dont want to live.

I’m sorry I don’t cherish life the way you do. I’m sorry I feel as if I don’t belong here. And I’m sorry that at any given point in time I will just completely give up and die. I’m sorry if me dying is an inconvenience to you. I’m so sorry, please forgive me.

—  I’m just so unhappy here and I’m tired of everything

I don’t think people realise… that if Trump wins it’s not just going to impact America… It’s going to impact the entire world and not for the better… like this isn’t just about America anymore… 

you know what drives me crazy? people that be standing up here saying “we need to give him the benefit of the doubt, we need to give him a chance and see how he leads”

I’m sorry, do you want the world to just fuckin…ignore the hate trail he ran as a campaign? we just what, pretend the last 18 months didn’t happen and his behaviours and attitudes and cabinet picks are not indicative of the man he is and the administration he’s going to run?

if someone treated you like shit every day at work, made your life hell, bullied you, objectified you, harassed you, and then got promoted and became your boss, do you just forget that happened because he might treat you better now he’s in charge?

nah fuck that, power doesn’t change a person for the better, it just makes the type of person they are more obvious, and idk how much more obvious it can be that he’s a hateful piece of shit, so fuck giving him a chance or the benefit of the doubt. fight back. resist. don’t ever accept this man as president. acknowledge it happened and fight to fix it, but don’t accept it. acceptance indicates something is okay, and this? absolutely isn’t.

I don’t want anybody to choose between me and somebody else.

I don’t want to be with somebody who will forever wonder if they made the right decision.

Go choose the other person.

Go wonder if you should’ve actually chosen me.

I don’t want somebody being with me and doubting about that decision.

I want things to be pure.
I want honesty and reality.
I don’t deserve constant doubt and trust issues.

I know how it is to trust somebody and regret it afterwards.
Do I really look like I would treat somebody in that way.
That’s fucking terrible.

—  Me to the world.
Moonsun shipper RIP part 2

So this happened…. Q: what is does solar mean to you? (Q for moonbyul) Moonbyul’ answer: “our vitamin. Healing existence. Treating me as a friend, she’s kind and knows me best. If I didn’t have her, I would not have come so far.” Q: what is moonbyul to you? (Q for solar) Solar’s answer: “a very loyal kid. Driving force of the team. Since I am the youngest at home, I had a hard time when I first became a leader, but because of moonbyul’s support I have overcome it. We can share everything in our relationship.” Me:

Originally posted by rnightly

one of the simultaneously best and worst things in being a fanartist is typing a character’s/actor’s into google images to find reference pics because this way you can find the weirdest stuff and i don’t even mean porn. being on the Internet i’ve seen my share of surprise porn and it doesn’t faze me anymore. i’m talking more about things like this

c O N S U M E  T H E  H A N D

It is with a very deep sadness that Billie Lourd confirms that her beloved mother Carrie Fisher passed away at 8:55 this morning,” reads the statement.

“She was loved by the world and she will be missed profoundly,” says Lourd. “Our entire family thanks you for your thoughts and prayers.”

— 

People Magazine

Fuck this year

youtube

“Baby I was afraid before… I’m not afraid anymore …”

Title: Heaven is a Place on Earth

Fandom: Black Mirror, Episode 4 - San Junipero

Song: Heaven is a Place on Earth, Belinda Carlisle

YouTube link

If you haven’t been living in a hole for the last few days, you know that Netflix’s original series Black Mirror has mended gay lady hearts around the world with episode 4 - San Junipero.  Lesbians.  The 80′s.  Happy endings.  Don’t be the only gay who hasn’t seen it.

As always, if you enjoyed watching, a reblog and/or comment is always much appreciated.  Go get your gay happy ending on.