i can't tell if this is actually funny or not but i'm giggling so

newworldchild  asked:

PJO AU question! (I'm very excited XD) What are the Gods reactions to finding out that Keith and Shiro are together? Also, do you think some of them made bets about when they'd get together?

Oh my god lmao I love this There’s another ask, Camp Version but I’ll answer the Gods Version first because this would be funny and this came first.

Voltron PJO AU: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 

The gods were having their luncheon (let’s pretend they actually do that) at Mouth Olympus. They were all gathered around the big golden table and Hephaestus TV was on. It was the gods’ entertainment, they get to see how their children are doing and they get to witness some dramas between the gods and the demigods.

Camp Half Blood was on, it showed that scene wherein the son of Ares had the son of Hades pinned down with his sword

“Oho! That’s my boy, Dan!” Cheered Ares as he drank wine. He looked around the table, “Mother’s from the marines. Pretty—”

“You were not supposed to injure your opponent, demigod.” Shiro on the TV said, catching everyone’s attention back.

Zeus smirked. 

Ares snorted, the same time his son on TV snorted. Like father like son. They witnessed Keith turning the tables and sneering at Dan. “You piece of shit.”

“Ohohohoho!” the other gods cheered. “Hades’ boy really knows how to get shit done.” Hermes barked out his laughter. 

Hades just shrugged proudly as he drank wine. “My boy is resilient.” Zeus could see how Hades was smiling a little when he saw his son immobilize the son of Ares. 

TV Keith spat out blood and walked out.

“Now that was just a very cool exit,” hummed Apollo. “Why can’t my kids be badass like your kids, Hades?” 

TV Shiro grabbed Keith’s arm but failed miserably to stop him. The gods continue to watch until they see Shiro sit beside Keith under the tree and they held hands.

“Oh, what is this?” Aphrodite perked up. She giggled. “Do I sense love in the air?” She wiggled her eyebrows at Zeus. “Your son has got good taste, doesn’t he, Zeus?”

“Now that you’ve mentioned it, Hades’ son is quite handsome. Like he’s so rugged yet handsome. Totally manly basing from what he did a while ago, too.” Apollo commented. “I’d totally—”

“Don’t finish that sentence, Apollo,” Hades interrupted to which the sun god just chuckled.

“I agree with Apollo though,” Athena joined. “They would be quite a pair. Two most powerful demigods? Together? Zeus and Hades’ offsprings at that?” She hummed in pleasure. 

“Definitely interesting! They could literally destroy the world!” Aphrodite rejoiced. “Imagine if they broke up.”

“No one is breaking up,” Zeus sighed. “Besides, they’re not even together yet.”

“Obviously, ‘cause your son is a wimp.” Hades muttered.

“Did you just call my son a wimp?” Zeus raised his eyebrow, bending a little forward to look at his brother. “Are you telling me he can’t muster up every ounce of confidence and confess his undying love for your boy?”

“Ah, so you do acknowledge he’s in love with my boy.” Hades smirked.

“Why of course. Everyone can see it. Can you?”

Hades just hummed. “I saw it the first time they met actually.”

“Oh my gods! Yes!” Aphrodite exclaimed. “It was the cutest puppy love! I was wondering when they will actually admit it.”

“Alright, alright. Bring it all in.” Hermes said. “Let’s start a betting pool. Let’s all see when one of them finally admits to the other, eh?”

“We are not placing bets on my son,” Zeus interrupted. “If he wants to take it slow, then he will take it slow.”

“You’re just scared you’ll lose, Dad,” Apollo giggled. “C’mon! Have a little faith in my lil brother, will ya? He’s got Zeus genes!” 

“I’m betting it will be Hades’ boy who will snap and just kiss him just to get shit done,” Hermes chuckled, placing his bet. “Give or take in a month.”

Hades gasped, scandalized. “My son has more tact than that!”

“This will be fun,” Aphrodite grinned as she looked at the TV and Shiro and Keith were napping under the tree.

E - Endearing

(Dean & Cas, ticklish!Dean, ticklish!Cas, tiny!octo!Cas)

Oh geez, don’t even get me started on tiny!ticklish!octo!Cas, because this is what happens, this wasn’t even on my list for a drabble but blame wordstrings’  and everyone else’s too adorable headcanons. Ugh help. (Also I saw a headcanon that octo!Cas is telepathic (and he doesn’t telepathate all the time, only when he needs to) but doesn’t actually talk, which I like, so that’s what I’m going with BECAUSE IT COMBINES COMMUNICATION AND QUTE LITTLE OCTOPUS NOISES ugh ignore my spelling I JUST GET SO EXCITED.)

~ ~ ~

Dean isn’t surprised when Cas scrambles up on the bed. It seems as though he spends every other night in Dean’s room, or in Sam’s when he isn’t around. He’s even less surprised when the little octopus creeps up onto his bare shoulder, because it’s one of his favorite places to be. The others are Dean’s hair, which he loves to sit and tangle his tentacles in, and his belly. When Dean asked about that one, Cas had replied that his stomach was soft and warm and comfy, like a pillow. If anyone else called him soft Dean thinks he would be offended, but the octo had said it so wide-eyed and earnestly that he really can’t mind.

He gives Cas a smile before turning back to his book, one that he’s actually reading for fun, for once. Cas peers curiously at the title before making his way down Dean’s torso to settle on his belly. He stops right in the center and flops down with a content coo, one of his tentacles slipping into Dean’s navel and making him hold back a laugh. “Stop it, that feels funny,” Dean scolds, though Cas looks too tired to care. His torso is curled inward and each of his tentacles are curled up into small balls, and he’s so damn cute that Dean just chuckles and gives Cas a little head rub. He purrs, but hooks his tentacle tighter around the lip of Dean’s belly button when he tries to pull it away, so Dean sighs and resigns himself to being tickled a bit for the foreseeable future, since Cas’ tentacles tend to twitch when he’s sleeping.

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anonymous asked:

I'm having a really rough day - nothing's going right and I've been on the recovery for my depression for over a year now and all of a sudden I can feel myself slipping and I was wondering if you would write some sterek fluff to cheer me up?

Stiles skids into Love At First Bite and slows to a halt. “Woah, god, I don’t know where to start!”

Allison and Scott follow him in, giggling at each other, Scott’s fingers twirling in Allison’s hair. Stiles rolls his eyes at them fondly and goes back to what’s important here.

The cakes.

He stares up at a four tiered chocolate cake with cascading cream roses trailing down the side. The detail in the roses is incredible and Stiles feels his mouth watering. He wants to know if they taste as sweet as they look—

“Don’t touch that.”

He jumps backwards and almost falls into a brick wall.

“Jeez,” he twists and sees it is not, in fact, a wall, but a ridiculously hot specimen of a man with an angry glare on his face. “Sorry, man, is this one for you?”

The man snorts, folding his arms and inclining his head at the cake. “No, I made that one.”

“Oh my god,” Stiles feels his mouth fall open. “You’re Derek Hale?”

Derek Hale’s ridiculously beautiful eyes narrow suspiciously at him. It’s really not fair. Stiles has been lusting after his cakes for years. Now he knows Derek isn’t some tiny old man with greying hair and spectacles he’s doomed. His dick is doomed. He’s never going to get a more delicious package than Derek Hale plus his cakes. He’s ruined for life.

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the signs when they lean in to whisper in your ear
  • Aries: inconveniently sneezes/coughs on you
  • Taurus: burps and runs off
  • Gemini: giggles so much at the close proximity that they don't even remember what they were about to say
  • Cancer: *whispering noises*
  • Leo: "I killed mufasa"
  • Virgo: tells an actual secret
  • Libra: *starts/tells rumour and watches as the world ends at their hands*
  • Scorpio: pauses quietly and then sCREAMS
  • Sagittarius: accidentally spits in your ear while they're talking
  • Aquarius: leans in too close and kisses your ear
  • Pisces: makes it look super important with a serious expression and everything. says "hi" and leaves
BTS actually having the jobs from the For You MV
  • ** Gas Station Assistants Jin & Namjoon **
  • customer: hey can u clean my car and fill up my gas tank
  • jin: u want me to do it for u?
  • c: yes.
  • j: *giggles*
  • c: what's so funny??
  • j: do u see these hands
  • c: yes
  • j: touch them
  • c: umm...
  • j: do it.
  • c: wow they're so soft
  • j: yes. i just put lotion on and they're not going anywhere near ur dirty car
  • c: is there someone who can help
  • namjoon: sure i can do it *drops pump on customer's foot* oops my bad
  • c:
  • n: dw you're on good hands *spills gas on car* ha classic *chips paint off* no one will notice
  • c:
  • n: all done, your total is *smashes gas pump into car window and breaks it* u know what for u it's free
  • n: still want me to clean it??
  • c: dont ever touch anything i own again
  • ** Bear Mascot Jungkook **
  • child: wow look it's a cute huge bear!
  • jungkook: i can't fking see anything w this thing on my head, dont cling on me
  • jk: *steps on toddler*
  • woman: let's take a photo with it!
  • jk: *takes bear head off*
  • jk: i'm on my break lady. not getting paid enough for this shit
  • w: wow aren't u too young to be working?
  • jk: im doing this for my gf
  • w: awwwww
  • jk: gonna buy a train ticket and go to her city tonight
  • w: awwwwwwwwwwwwww
  • jk: she said her parents aren't home
  • w:
  • ** Sales Assistant Taehyung **
  • customer: hi i was looking for baby wipes
  • taehyung: me too, tell me when u find them
  • c: do u not work here??
  • t: yes can't u see i'm stacking mentos boxes
  • c:
  • t: my mom dropped me here this morning, i've been looking for her ever since
  • t: then a kind old man said he'll give me pocket money if i do this and it's kinda fun
  • t: but really i don't know the way back home
  • customer 2: where can I find condoms in here?
  • t: what
  • c2: you know...condoms..
  • t:
  • c2: you're making it more awkward than it already is, just point me in the right direction
  • t:
  • t: do u want a lollipop, they're rly good
  • ** Yoongi the pizza delivery boy **
  • yoongi: here's ur pizza
  • customer: pretty sure it was supposed to get here like an hr ago
  • y: shit happens
  • c: wow it's really cold too, did u fall asleep on the way here or sth
  • y: *grabs slice and bites into it*
  • y: u dont sound too hungry
  • c: wtf im gonna report this
  • y: go ahead, don't forget i know where u live
  • c:
  • y: also i can go back and re-make the pizza for u. personally.
  • c: umm no it's ok..
  • y: that'll be $15
  • c: but here it says $9.99 -
  • y: $15
  • c: ok. maybe can u take the trash on ur way out though
  • y: idk u seem kinda heavy to be carried outside
  • c: *goes back in and starts crying into pizza*
So my choir did some recruitment stuff over the summer and we had a bunch of new people show up who may join us.
  • One of them was a nine year old girl I'll call J for privacy's sake. She sat next to me with the other sopranos. I was acting autistic as heck (twisting my Tangle and rocking) because there were new people and things were a little out of sorts. I had the cutest conversation with her about autism.
  • Me: *Rocking and twisting my Tangle while I wait for practice to start*
  • J: *Keeps peeking over at me*
  • Me: *Notices she has Elsa on her shirt* Ooh, nice shirt. I like Elsa. *quietly sings the beginning of "Let It Go"*
  • J: *whispering* Me too! I really like Frozen. Wait, you watch cartoons? How old are you?
  • Me: I'm thirty-five. How old are you?
  • J: Nine. You still watch cartoons? Really?
  • Me: *trying not to laugh out loud* If anybody ever tells you you're too old for cartoons, remind that person that adults make 'em.
  • J: *Laughs* What's your name?
  • Me: Cyndi.
  • J: *Tells me her name*
  • Me: Nice to meet you, J. *notices John(choir director) sitting down at the piano, which is an environmental cue that practice is about to start* Oops, looks like we're gonna start.
  • Then choir practice got started and my conversation with J kind of fell by the wayside. I helped J find where she was supposed to look because she didn't know how to read or follow sheet music. I used my Tangle to point most of the time.
  • Later on, J approached me during the 15 minute break we had in the middle so people could use the restroom, get drinks and stretch their legs.
  • Me: *Doing major Tangle cranking and rocking during the break*
  • J: *Notices me moving and comes over*
  • J: What's that twisty red thing?
  • Me: It's my Tangle. It helps me stay calm.
  • J: Why are you moving so much?
  • Me: I'm autistic.
  • J: What's that?
  • Me: It's what makes me, me. You could say I'm a little different.
  • J: Different how?
  • Me: *Thinks a sec* It's like our music scores. See how I have an octavo and you have Xerox sheets?
  • J: Yeah.
  • Me: *Opens my octavo for a song and points to the Xeroxed copy on J's chair.* It's like this sheet music. See how they both show the same notes? Your music isn't bound like a book, so you have to hold it a little differently than I hold mine so it doesn't spill everywhere.
  • J: *Picks up her Xeroxed music and tries to hold it at just the bottom like an octavo and the papers bend backwards* Oh! Yeah!
  • Me: That's what an autistic brain is like. It's not bad or less, it just needs to be taken care of a little different.
  • J: Does autistic hurt?
  • Me: *Giggles* Only sometimes because I have sensitive hearing. Certain noises hurt my ears and I might look like somebody punched me. Every autistic person is different.
  • J: Is that why you don't look at me when we're talking?
  • Me: I am looking at you, I'm just not looking at your eyes. Most autistic people don't look people in the eyes because it feels a little bit scary. I'm looking at your face, but not at your eyes. I'm looking at *points at my own mouth* your mouth.
  • J: *Grins* You're so weird!
  • Me: Thanks! *sticks out tongue, laughs*
  • J: What's it feel like?
  • Me: Sorry, what?
  • J: What's autistic feel like?
  • Me: Hmmm... *thinking of a comparison a nine year old can relate to* ...kinda like I want to pay attention to everything at the same time, especially in places with lots of talking like this. Remember how muddled up the tenors and altos sounded when they messed up that line in the "Holy, Holy"?
  • J: *nods*
  • Me: That's what a lot of people talking can sound like to me. I can't make sense of what people are trying to say to me when there's a lot of noise. *Speaks quieter on purpose* Can you understand what I'm saying if I talk quieter than everybody else?
  • J: What?
  • Me: *smiles* I said can you understand what I'm saying if I talk quieter than everybody else? Another funny thing with me is I can think of a bunch of words to say about thinks I like or know a lot about, but I can't think of any words to say if people start discussing something I'm not interested in, like political stuff. That's when I get real quiet and start daydreaming a lot.
  • J: *gets real serious looking* Do people die from being autistic?
  • Me: Nah! Some autistic people need a lot of help with everything like eating, taking a shower or putting on clothes. Some of us, like me, can get dressed, eat and take showers, but I need somebody to drive me places because I can't pay attention to everything you have to pay attention to when you drive, I can't cook because the measurements get really confusing for me and I have trouble cleaning a messy room without some help. Lessee...some of us can't talk at all or can only say a few words-- that's called being nonverbal or nonspeaking. Nonverbal autistic people might use other ways to talk, like sign language, computers or pictures. Sometimes it can take a long time to figure out a way to communicate, but autistic people who can't talk are still smart. Not being able to talk doesn't mean somebody can't think or understand.
  • J: Ooh, okay, I'll try to remember that. What's that wiggle you're doing right now?
  • Me: *Realizes I'm rocking on my chair* The moving around I do is called stimming and it's something that helps me make sense of all this noise. I might have trouble talking if it gets too much louder in here. I may get clumsy too, so sorry in advance if I bump into you a lot. ((Clumsiness is due to my variable proprioception.))
  • J: I'll watch out so you don't fall down.
  • Me: *So amused by this cute kid* I don't think I'll actually fall, but thanks!
  • J: *sits down and picks up her folder* Did you get autistic because you hit your head?
  • Me: *rocks some more* No, people are born autistic and it's a lifelong thing. There are some quack doctors who think vaccines cause it, but they were wrong. There are other quack doctors who think it can be 'cured' but most autistic people don't want that. We're happy being who we are. Being autistic isn't bad, it's just different.
  • J: How do you spell autistic?
  • Me: Like this. *Writes it on a Post-it note and gives it to her* Now if you look it up on the internet, make sure you avoid anything by this group-- *Writes Autism Speaks on the Post-it too* --because they want you to think being autistic is a bad, scary thing when it's not. They want to make it go away because they think people who can't talk or take care of themselves are suffering when they aren't.
  • J: That's so mean!
  • Me: Yeah! They're mean! Anything that has to do with lighting it up blue and blue puzzle pieces is related to Autism Speaks. That wannabe charity is bad news for autistic people. Autism Speaks makes us feel bad about being who we are. *Writes "Autism Speaks is mean!" on the Post-it note*
  • J: *puts Post-it note in her pencil case* I won't click anything by them.
  • Me: Great! You're already helping me a lot by avoiding Autism Speaks. Oops, here comes John. Breaktime's over.
  • John: Doing okay with all the noise, Cyndi?
  • Me: Yup! *Tips folder by accident, drops my music EVERYWHERE* Aaaaaaaaaand there's me being a klutz.
  • J: Oops! *Helps me pick it up*
  • Me: Thanks.
  • Then we went back to practice. I was this kiddo's first encounter with autism and I hope she stays around with the choir so she sees it's not a horrible person-stealing disease.
Humans attempting to explain commercials to Leupai
  • Inspired by the Revix culture's struggle to understand human culture, as told by @Leupai
  • L= Leupai
  • H= Human
  • H: So the purpose of a commercial is to sell a product
  • L: ...sell?
  • H: yeah, like you want someone to give you money or goods for whatever you're offering them, so you're trying to show them the benefit of doing so
  • L: but why not just give it to them?
  • H: because that's not how economies work, you exchange goods and services to maintain a sense of balance-
  • L: but not actual balance?
  • H: *pinches nose* let's start over.
  • L: okay
  • H: ...a commercial is a tool of persuasion.
  • L: it certainly does a lot to confuse
  • H: that's because you need to understand the basic intent of the commercial, as well as how to build a scenario that presents a problem that customers face and offers a solution.
  • L: so it's a problem solver!
  • H: it's a SOLUTION suggestion!
  • L: so if someone can't find their house you make a commercial to tell them where it is?
  • H: no-
  • L: or if their mound key is missing!
  • H: that's not-
  • L: oooohhh, I could make one about how to bake a cake!
  • H: THAT hang onto that thought, you MIGHT be able to use that as an idea-
  • L: I'll go do that right now-
  • H: wait waIT WAIT!
  • L: what is it? You seem awfully high strung, is something wrong?
  • H: I'm trying to explain an Earth concept and you aren't listening.
  • L: Oh I listened very carefully, you just need to work on explaining!
  • H: believe me, I am. Now, for the sake of your example, let's say the intent of the commercial is to make people bake a cake following your recipe, right?
  • L: yesssss
  • H: now, on Earth you don't just GIVE them the recipe in the commercial; you have a limited time frame, that's not nearly long enough, plus there's no personal benefit to simply giving it to them.
  • L: my benefit is sharing my cake recipe
  • H: ok that's fine, but with a cake commercial, you make it to get people interested in your cake in the first place, then show them how to get the cake recipe from you.
  • L: ....I think I'm following but you sort of lost me
  • H: ok, list three reasons why someone should bake your cake
  • L: Oooh, I can name fifty! It's big, it's filling, it's sweet and changes color! It's so fattening, you'd burst your cessile within the hour! The ingredients can be harvested from donsair-
  • H: ok ok I get- wait, why would it being super fattening be appealing?
  • L: .........
  • H: ....cultural thing?
  • L: sure let's call it that.
  • H: o...kay... So let's pick three traits: it changes color, it's super fattening, you can make it at home from... What did you say they were called?
  • L: Donsair
  • H: what's that?
  • L: you humans lack words for it, but it's sort of like- uh, not like your dogs and cats, but you can spoil them with food or eat them or have them go on adventures with you!
  • H: so livestock with combat abilities?
  • L: yes!
  • H: ok, so it's possible to make it completely at home?
  • L: except for one or two ingredients, yes!
  • H: ok, so fattening, homemade, and colorful are the big focuses of your commercial to sell your cake recipe
  • L: share my cake recipe
  • H : no, sell it, commercials sell
  • L: oh... Wait, what's selling again?
  • H: I'll get to that in a moment. Now let's say you want to show your cake changes color, how do you show that?
  • L: i show how to make the batt-
  • H: no no no, you have thirty seconds to show and tell people that your cake is colorful, fattening, homemade, and how to get it, you can't show how to make it unless it's in a pre-mixed box, and that box is what you're selling.
  • L: oh you're no fun!
  • H: I don't make the rules.
  • L: well whoever did is no fun!
  • H: so again, how do you show that this cake changes color?
  • L: ........
  • H: ....
  • L: .... Take video of the cake changing color?
  • H: yea! Of course, humans have video editing programs, so you need to explain that it's really changing color on top of that-
  • L: why, they can see it changing!
  • H: it lends credibility. Now, you have a shot of it changing color, now how do you show or tell people that it's fattening?
  • L: eat it!
  • H: okay, but do you time lapse, or do you show before and after?
  • L: what's time lapse?
  • H: it shows footage taken over several minutes or hours and narrows it down to being only a few seconds by speeding it up tremendously
  • L: *giggles*
  • H: what?
  • L: it sounds funny, let's do that!
  • H: ok, now how do you show your customers tha-
  • L: customers? What's a customer?
  • H: people buying your cake recipe, the people this commercial is for!
  • L: you still need to explain buying and selling to me
  • H: I will! We aren't there yet.
  • L: *sigh* fine
  • H: .... So how do you show or tell that you can make this cake with homemade ingredients from donsair?
  • L: *snickers again*
  • H: whaaaat now?
  • L: you say "donsair" really cute!
  • H: what's wrong with how I say donsair?
  • L: *giggles loudly*
  • H: nevermind! How do you tell folks that they can make it at home?
  • L: just....tell em?
  • H: that actually could work.
  • L: do you have to go through all these steps for every comier?
  • H: these are just the first in a series of steps
  • H: how do you think I feel?
  • L: why can't I just GIVE them the cake recipe?
  • H: because you subjected yourself to doing things the human way.
  • L: *grumbles* no wonder so many've ditched your planet then
  • H: what?
  • L: just thinking aloud! *sits up* so what's next?
  • H: well, you've shown the strong points of your cake, now how do people get the recipe?
  • L: I will come to them!
  • H: How will you know they'll want it?
  • L: everyone loves cake!
  • H: not really. Plus that's not safe.
  • L: ????? Humans don't like cake???
  • H: not all of them do, no.
  • L: ????? *tilts head like a lost puppy*
  • H: so for your commercial, if you choose to go to them, they need a way to con-
  • H: oh my g-
  • H: some of it sucks, yes
  • H: well for the love o' god work with me on the commercial so we can get the word out that you're fixing Earth cake, PLEASE!
  • L: Can't talk off to save cake! *takes off*
  • H: WAI- oh the hell with it I don't wanna do this anyway.

anonymous asked:

You don't know how much I'm giggling and screaming about those Soriel wedding headcanons ;A; THEY'RE SO ADORABLE MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT. I know Sans might not tell anyone just to keep it as a surprise but can you imagine what would happen if the others found out and try to help him out behind the scenes?


omg I can actually see that?? I mean, Sans has no idea what he should do as a proposal/for a wedding– he’s a giant nerd – and outright romantic things aren’t exactly his thing and he get’s embarrassed pretty easily when it comes to emotional/sincere stuff, and AHHH

Papyrus would be the first one to find out, definitely, and he’d PROBE until Sans broke and Sans is like “bro……………….. i need help.”

And Pappy is just “you want to MARRY THE FORMER QUEEN?!?!” 

Sans: (//trying to be aloof) W-Well we’ve been dating for awhile now, and I think it’s about time that I treat her right and properly and–


Sans: W-wait, slow down bro, I-I haven’t even proposed yet–


Sans: Um? Soon? I think?


Sans: …!! //sweats

Papyrus: Worry not, dear brother. I shall guide you.

cries im dead

Sans needs all the help he can get in all things proposal/wedding related legit.

Can you imagine Sans and Tori talks though about it, like

“What kind of cake should we have? … Er, snail? Are you sure– hahaha okay, you got me there Tori very funny. What? I wasn’t going to suggest a cake filled with condiments! … That isn’t even a thing, I’m sure. … You’re right, we can just scrap the cake and make a giant pie can’t we. But then my brother might be disappointed. Yeah, Frisk would want a giant cake too wouldn’t they.”


and them choosing colours and flowers and where they’re going to get married (definitely outdoors) and who to invite and AHHH

In which Hiccstrid tell the children about the day Hiccup got drunk..
  • Addie: You know, I'm learning a lot about Finn's and my early days. Tell me more, mom
  • Astrid: Well your dad got wasted one night.
  • Hiccup: Gods, do we really have to tell her that story?
  • Addie: He was that excited, huh?
  • Astrid: Not exactly. I didn't want to tell anyone I was pregnant and you know how your Uncle Gobber keeps the wine flowing, even if we politely decline. Repeatedly.
  • Hiccup: So, since your mother couldn't drink and she didn't want to tell anyone about you two, we kept switching tankards. The rest of the night was a bit fuzzy.
  • Astrid: Well I remember it clearly.
  • Hiccup: Oh gods, please don't...
  • Astrid: Your Poppy helped me direct him to the house. He wasn't so good at walking in a straight line.
  • Hiccup: Everything was spinning!
  • Astrid: And then you puked all over the Great Hall steps.
  • Addie: Oh lovely-
  • Hiccup: Thanks for preserving my dignity.
  • Addie: Ehh, you're probably not the first to have done that.
  • Hiccup: No, I seem to remember Finn getting the stomach flu that one time-
  • Finn: Nope! We're not telling stories about me! Finish this one!
  • Astrid: Anyway... after that, your dad was fine for a bit. Until we got him home.
  • Hiccup: Astrid please-
  • Astrid: And he turned to look at your Poppy and then, while giggling like a little girl, said, right to his face, "you look like a yak!"
  • Finn: Right to his face??
  • Addie: What did he say?
  • Hiccup: Actually, what did he say?
  • Astrid: Well, he was doing his best not to burst out laughing.
  • Hiccup: Oh thank gods he thought it was funny...
  • Astrid: I could hear him laughing all the way to the village. And now on to the best part-
  • Hiccup: Best part?
  • Astrid: When I was trying to push you into the tub-
  • Hiccup: What! NO! Don't tell them-
  • Astrid: He tried to seduce me.
  • Finn: Dad, you just got the best man points known to mankind!
  • Hiccup: I was a newlywed!! Maybe someday you'll understand! Okay okay, it's not that funny-
  • Finn: What did he say?? I want to know-
  • Hiccup: NO, FINN! Astrid, don't tell our son the scandalous ways of my youth! HE CAN'T KNOW!
  • Finn: Oh gods, now I MUST know!!
  • Astrid: Well first he questioned as to why we'd want to get it on in the room with the tub.
  • Hiccup: Oh gods...
  • Astrid: But he soon got over that and started making faces at me that I think were supposed to be seductive.
  • Hiccup: Hey, I can make some very seductive expressions. Don't lie.
  • Addie: Okay, now this is too much information. But seriously. Nice going, dad.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()
  • Sam
  • "So how are you and your boyfriend, Sam?" my mom asked on the other line of the phone. I rolled my eyes and inter ally sighed. I didn't actually have a boyfriend. But my, god was my mother getting annoying asking me when I'd get a boyfriend and bring him over. So I lied and said I did have one. Didn't even give her a name or anything. And somehow, she, and everyone else believed me. And it's been going for about two and a half weeks now.
  • "We're fine, mom." I sighed into the phone. My mom clicked.
  • "You don't sound fine." She inferred. Act in love, Sam.
  • "We are, don't worry, I'm just really tired." I reassured. She stayed silent for a moment.
  • "Okay... How about you two come over for dinner on Friday?" She asked. That caught me off guard. I moved out of my parents house a few months ago, since I was 18 and had enough money saved up. So I lived in an apartment building across town.
  • "Uhhh..." I pulled my phone away from my face to check what day it was. Wednesday. I haven't seen my parents or my brother and sister in almost a month. I couldn't say no.
  • "... sure..." I replied dully. She giggled.
  • "Great! I can't wait to meet this guy. I'm sure you got your paws on one handsome devil! Come around six?" She finished. My mouth ran dry. What the fuck was I gonna do? I couldn't come up with a clever break-up story in three days. Maybe I should tell them he died in some ridiculous way. That'd be kind of funny. But not believable. I guess I just had to go with it. I sighed.
  • "Yeah, I guess." I huffed. My mom giggled.
  • "Yay! Okay, I love you, baby! I'll see you then." She concluded before hanging up. I ended the call and threw my phone on the couch. Fuuuuuuck.
  • I thought for a long while and what the hell I was gonna tell my parents. I did NOT wanna tell them the truth and have them nag, nag, nag me about it. But what could I do? I thought for a while more before it came to me. I could have someone pretend to be my boyfriend for the night. I thought about my options. Right away, Mike and Matt were off the table. They were in the middle of some ridiculous love triangle with Emily. Chris wasn't exactly an option either. He and Ashley had something. I don't know what it is, but it's something. And the way Chris takes things, he'd get the wrong idea. So that only left one other person.. Josh. It's not that I didn't like Josh, because I did, I was closer to him then anyone else. But the thought of asking him to pretend to be my boyfriend for a night was a little weird. But what else could I do. I sighed and pulled out my phone and texted Josh.
  • 'I'm coming over.' I texted.
  • 'Ummm?? Ok but no ones here'
  • 'That's fine. Hahahaha I need a favor.'
  • 'Oh god. Should I be scared?'
  • 'Uh, maybe?'
  • ' jesus Sam'
  • 'Be there in like ten minutes.'
  • 'You suck'
  • I laughed and closed my phone, not responding. I gathered my stuff and headed to Josh's house. This was gonna be an interesting conversation.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()()
  • I approached Josh's house and groaned. I was already regretting it. But it was too late now. This was a better idea then any of the others I came up with. I walked up to the door and knocked.
  • "Helloooo? Josh?" I yelled. Nothing. I turned the handle of the door out of curiosity and sure enough, it was open. I walked in slowly, closing the door behind me.
  • "Josh?" I called again. Still nothing. I walked into the living room and sat my bag down. I've done this before and usually Josh is just in the bathroom or getting out of the shower or something. I stood and waited. For a lot longer then I wanted to. I pulled out my phone text him. Suddenly, a pair of hands jabbed my sides and a yelled in my ear. I knew damn well who it was but I still screamed and dropped my phone. I whirled around and go figure, there was Josh, giggling like an idiot. I flushed. I didn't like when people grabbed my sides.
  • "Josh!" I growled, slapping his arm as he laughed at my minor shame.
  • "Hey, lame-o, what's up?" He chuckled. I rolled my eyes, remembering this awkward talk I was about to have. I sighed.
  • "Hey, is everything okay?" He asked, his smile slowly dying away.
  • "Uhhh, okay. So remember my parents?" I asked. He nodded.
  • "Remember that thing I told them? That was actually true a few weeks ago?" I continued. He raised an eyebrow.
  • "Yeeaaaahhh..? The one where you told them you have a boyfriend when you very well do not?" He said, a ghost of a smile on his face. I nodded.
  • "Yeah, well, they wanna meet said boyfriend on Friday at their house for dinner, and I can't get out of it." I went on. Josh simply blinked.
  • "And... I need someone to pretend to be my boyfriend for the night." I finished, smiling a little too innocently. Josh was unresponsive for a moment before he ultimately burst into laughter. I stared at him as he laughed.
  • "Okay, okay, lemme get that straight. You want me to be your boyfriend for the night?" He repeated. I looked at the floor. Hearing it out of someone else, it sounded ridiculous.
  • "Yeeees..." I groaned. I didn't look at him.
  • "Okay." He said casually. I snapped my head up.
  • "What?" I asked, kind of skeptical that he agreed to this. Let alone as casually as he did.
  • "I said okay. I'll pretend to be your boyfriend so you don't have to deal with the wrath of your parents." He said clearly. Thank. God. I huffed.
  • "Thank you!" I groaned.
  • "No problem, babe." Josh said, winking at me. I blushed.
  • "No! Don't call me that." I stammered. He noticed my demeanor and snickered.
  • "Sorry, dear." He smirked.
  • "Stoooop! I'm going home, Josh." I growled.
  • "Whatever you say, baby." He continued. It was really weird coming from him.
  • "Goodbye! Josh!" I screeched, walking out the door.
  • "I LOVE YOU, BABYYYY!" He yelled after me.
  • "Baaaaaaaaaah!" I yelled back as I walked out of his yard.
  • "I will see you Friday at 5!" I yelled as I walked away. This was gonna be a looooong Friday.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()()()
  • Friday came a lot faster then I wanted it to and I dreaded it a lot. This was gonna be super weird. I mean, even if I was bringing my family an ACTUAL boyfriend, it would be weird. But it was going to be even weirder because I wasn't bringing them a boyfriend. I was bringing them a Josh. Good thing Josh has never met my parents before. A beep outside distracted me from my dreading. It was Josh. I took a deep breath and made my way out into the Fall outdoors. There was Josh outside my Apartment building in his stupid little car with a stupid little smile on his stupid little face. I wordlessly got into the passenger seat.
  • "Hey, you look nice." He complimented. I snorted. I really didn't. I'd usually dress a little better to go see my parents. But I didn't totally bum it. I could tell Josh had literally JUST got out of the shower because his hair was still a little wet and his entire car smelled like Axe.
  • "Are you seriously okay? I can pretend to be sick and you can tell your mom I have malaria." He suggested. I laughed, remembering that I actually considered telling my parents my boyfriend died.
  • "It's okay. I'm okay." I assured, nodding my head.
  • "Promise?" He asked, offering his pinky. I wrapped my pinky around his and squeezed.
  • "Promise." I repeated. He smiled.
  • "Okay." He said quietly before starting his car and setting off to my parents house.
  • "So, how should I act? What should I do?" He asked, sounding almost nervous. I raised an eyebrow. What did he have to be nervous about?
  • "Uhhh.. Just be you. We're gonna have to hold hands and whatnot but just be yourself." I shrugged. He nodded.
  • He opened his mouth to say something but closed it.
  • "What?" I asked. His face slowly got red and he shook his head.
  • "Nothing." He mumbled. I tilted my head. I've never see Josh like this. Josh was almost always goofy. Kind of cocky. Never did I ever see him nervous, this was kind of unlike him.
  • "What are you all nervous about?" I asked out of curiosity. He shook his head.
  • "I don't know...." he said, giving me a weird look. I dropped the subject as we pulled up in front of my parents house. I exhaled deeply.
  • Josh parked and looked at me.
  • "You ready?" He asked, his face suddenly eager. I rolled my eyes. Not really. But there was no turning back. I sighed and nodded my head.
  • "Yeah, let's go." I mumbled, getting out of the car. My stomach was in knots. I didn't really care if they didn't like him or not... Okay, I did, but that wasn't my main concern. My main concern was that now my parents will now forever think of Josh Washington as my boyfriend. And that was really weird to me. Josh waited for me and once I caught up to him he gave me one last look as to say "are you sure you're sure?" I nodded my head and walked up to the door, knocking gracefully.
  • "Don't be nervous." He whispered quickly, just before the door opened and my smiling mother appeared.
  • "Sammy-bear!" She squeaked before hugging me tightly.
  • "Hi, mom." I giggled. I was happy to see her after almost a month. I needed this. She eyed Josh for a moment.
  • "Is the boyfriend I've heard next to nothing about?" My mom asked. I was kind of flustered.
  • "Uh, yes! Mom, this is my b-boyfriend, Josh." I said with an awkward smile. It felt so weird to say. I looked at Josh and he seemed almost confused and a bit lost. I grabbed his hand and gave him a look. He looked surprised for a moment, before snapping back into it.
  • "Uh-um, yeah, hi, I'm Josh Washington. Nice to finally meet you." He greeted politely. I was surprised he was capable.
  • "Hello, Josh, nice to finally meet you, too." My mom said. This might not be too bad.
  • "Well, come on in!" My mom cheered, scurrying into two house. I looked at Josh. He looked back at me.
  • "You okay?" He asked. I nodded. He squeezed my hand a little tighter. I involuntarily smiled. What the hell is happening to me? I brushed it off and yanked Josh in the house. I followed my mom into the dining room.
  • "Hey, Sam's here with her boyfriend!" My mom announced to my father, brother, and sister at the table.
  • "How much did you pay him to show?" My brother asked, causing Josh to chuckle. I, took my hand from his and elbowed him in the ribs.
  • "Shut up, Evan." I growled.
  • "Relax," Josh whispered in my ear. I let out a breath and calmed down. It was awkward for a moment, Josh and I being the only ones standing.
  • "Well, don't to strangers, sit down, you two!" My dad said. I did as my dad said and dragged Josh to a chair next to me and we both sat down.
  • "Uh, Josh, this is my dad. My brother, Evan, and my sister, Brooke." I introduced.
  • "Hi." He said awkwardly. Everyone else kind of mumbled "hellos."
  • "Well, dinners almost done, so for now, we can just talk." My mom shrugged.
  • "Josh." My dad said. Josh tensed up next to me.
  • "Yes?"
  • "Do you wanna come and help me get drinks for everyone?" My dad asked. I instantly got nervous. He was about to have a talk with Josh. And with Josh's attitude it might not be too pleasant. And Josh knew it because his foot started tapping on the floor like crazy. I put my hand on his.
  • "U-um, yeah!" He stammered. My dad nodded and got up up, then walking into the kitchen. Josh got up and walked with him, but not before giving me a peck on my head, which made me blush hard. My mother grinned as he walked away, noticing my almost surprised expression.
  • "How long have you two been dating?" My sister asked. I blinked slowly.
  • "A little more then a month." I said, kind of out of it.
  • "He really likes you, huh? He does! I can tell by the ways he acts!" My sister inquired. That caught me a little off guard and I had to think. I wasn't too sure if Josh was a good actor or not, but tonight it seemed like it. But then again, he was so nervous before we got here... And he was obviously trying to make some sort of good impression on my mom and who knows what's he saying to my dad.
  • "Right?" My sister asked. I thought a little but slowly nodded.
  • "Yeah.. I guess he does." I mumbled. As if on cue, my dad and Josh came out of the kitchen. I was almost surprised when thy came out laughing and talking. Josh slid in the chair next to me and my dad sat down as well.
  • "Some drinks..." Evan muttered. My dad's expression turned a bit sour upon realizing he didn't even get drinks.
  • "Damn. I'll get 'em." He said plainly, going back into the kitchen. I leaned close to Josh.
  • "What'd you say to him?" I whispered for only him to hear, kind of puzzled by how my dad was totally and absolutely cool with it. Josh smiled.
  • "The truth." He whispered confidently. My eyes went wide.
  • "About the you and I situation?" I replied. He shook his head.
  • "Not exactly." He whispered. I gave him a puzzled look and he just smiled at the rest of the table. I raised an eyebrow, kind of afraid of what they talked about. I almost didn't wanna know.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()
  • The night went okay, Josh and I did fake couple things like hold hands at the table and and hug a little longer then most would. Everyone got along. It wasn't that bad. And the night was almost over.
  • "How about me make toasts?" My dad suggested.
  • "With Pepsi?" I quirked, tilting my head. My mom shrugged.
  • "Why not?" My mom smiled. She stood.
  • "I'll go first... A toast to my lovely family! I wouldn't change a thing." She said before sitting down. I smiled. Evan stood.
  • "A toast to myself. Because I am a bad-ass motherfucker." He said. My mother gasped and I slapped my hand over my mouth. Josh, however, proceeded to laugh his ass off.
  • "Evan! Language!" My father hissed. Evan just smirked. I slapped Josh's arm as he laughed hysterically.
  • "Josh!" I growled, trying myself not to laugh. He tapped my arm.
  • "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm calm." He chuckled, clearing his throat. Emma stood.
  • "A toast to Sam! I'm glad you finally decided to come over." She grinned and sat back down.
  • "Thank you." I mouthed to her before standing up for my turn. I thought before I spoke.
  • "Ahh, a toast to all of you! Mom, dad, Emma, Evan, Josh. You're all so important to me, and I don't know what I'd to without you." I finished before sitting down. Josh didn't even look at me before he stood up. He took a deep breath before starting.
  • "Okay, um, a toast to... My girlfriend. My beautiful, amazing, best friend. Sam.. I don't know where I'd be if I'd never met you. And I can never, ever, repay you for what you've done for me. Thank you." Josh finished before finally sitting back down. My jaw dropped open. I couldn't believe what he said. I looked at him for a long time. He didn't look back at me. A smile slowly stretched across my face and I leaned over and pecked Josh on the cheek. He smiled and blushed.
  • "That was nice..." my mother said quietly. My dad stood up.
  • "Well, my toast is also to my wonderful family. And Josh, who I hope will stay around a long while. Tonight was perfect in the most imperfect way. And that's just the way I want it." My father finished to close the night. We all smiled. My mother wiped the forming tears out of her eyes. Josh wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me into him. I leaned into his chest and smiled. Tonight was amazing.
  • "Um, I really think we should get going.." I announced, intertwining my fingers with Josh's
  • "Are you sure?" My mom asked. I nodded.
  • "Yeah, it's getting late I'm tired." I said. My brother snorted.
  • "Use condoms." He said. My face flushed and Josh laughed.
  • "Evan, stop!" I hissed. Josh squeezed my shoulder and I relaxed. I don't know why that of all things calmed me down. My head was all confused, I needed sleep.
  • "Oh yeah, I almost forgot." Josh mumbled. I was about to ask what he was talking about until he pulled me into him and brushed his lips against mine. I didn't respond out of surprise. And then he stepped back. I couldn't speak, just babbled incoherent things. Did... he just... do that? Maybe it was just for my parents to see it now something, I don't know. Now we really needed to go.
  • "Bye everyone, I love you!" I said loudly before dragging Josh out the door. We got in the car and drove away.
  • "Well that was ah... Interesting." Josh quirked. I nodded slowly. And it was. It went a lot better then expected to
  • "Yeah...." I mumbled, still kind of shocked by the random kiss. I didn't know if he was planning it or what but I was still kind of surprised. I mean, I was still have a hard time processing Josh as my "boyfriend."
  • "Maybe we should go out as a couple again sometime. Pretend to be a couple around town." Josh shrugged. I snorted.
  • "Or we could not pretend.." he said quietly. What was he implying? I mean, I knew he was joking but still. I laughed.
  • "Good one." I replied. He stayed silent for a second.
  • "Yeah, I was uh... just.... just joking." He said quietly. The rest of the care ride was silent until he pulled up to my apartment building.
  • "Thank you so, so, so much for this Josh! I have no idea how to repay you!" I thanked as I exited the car. He put a hand up.
  • "Don't. Tonight was nice." He said. I nodded and turned to walk inside. Then I remembered something I wanted to ask him and turned back around.
  • "Josh?" I asked. He looked at me.
  • "Yeah?"
  • "When you said you told my dad the truth... What did you mean?" I asked curiously. Josh bit his lip and raised his eyebrows.
  • "Well.. He asked me how I really felt about you. So I told him the truth." Josh said simply. I thought for a minute. But when my dad came out of the kitchen, he was still obviously under the impression that Josh and I were dating. Wait a minute... I finally put two and two together. He literally asked me out in the car and I thought he was kidding! He was not kidding!
  • "Oh, wait, Josh..." I said, feeling like an asshole. He shook his head.
  • "Don't worry about it, Sam. I'll see you later." He said, driving off without another word.  I called for him but he kept driving, driving, driving and then he was gone. My head was running wild. I'm so dumb. I didn't realize Josh liked me.. I'm not even sure how I feel about him. I mean... I don't know if I like him... Of course not, its Josh. Obviously I do, he's the only one that can do what he does to me. Ugh, this was so confusing. Suddenly, my phone started to buzz and I pulled it out of my pocket and it was a text. From Josh.
  • "I had to do it just once." It said. I ran my fingers over my lips and felt my cheeks get red.
  • Ugh... Josh... What did I do?
  • radio host: give us a freestyle iggy
  • iggy: alright got a fresh one for ya
  • iggy: [man's voice] Once upon a time
  • in a kingdom far, far away,
  • the king and queen were blessed
  • with a beautiful baby girl.
  • And throughout the land,
  • everyone was happy...
  • until the sun went down
  • and they saw that their daughter was
  • cursed with a frightful enchantment
  • that took hold each and every night.
  • Desperate, they sought the help
  • of a fairy godmother
  • who had them lock the young princess
  • away in a tower,
  • there to await the kiss...
  • of the handsome Prince Charming.
  • [horse whinnies]
  • It was he who would chance
  • the perilous journey
  • through blistering cold
  • and scorching desert
  • traveling for many days and nights,
  • risking life and limb
  • to reach the Dragon's keep.
  • [crows caw]
  • For he was the bravest,
  • and most handsome...
  • in all the land.
  • And it was destiny that his kiss
  • would break the dreaded curse.
  • He alone would climb to the highest room
  • of the tallest tower
  • to enter the princess's chambers,
  • cross the room to her sleeping silhouette,
  • pull back the gossamer curtains
  • to find her... [gasps]
  • What?
  • - Princess... Fiona?
  • - No!
  • [sighs relief] Oh, thank heavens.
  • Where is she?
  • - She's on her honeymoon.
  • - Honeymoon? With whom?
  • - She's on her honeymoon.
  • - Honeymoon? With whom?
  • [ Counting Crows: Accidentally In Love]
  • So she said
  • what's the problem, baby?
  • What's the problem?
  • I don't know
  • Well, maybe I'm in love
  • Think about it
  • every time I think 'bout it
  • Can't stop thinking 'bout it
  • How much longer
  • will it take to cure this?
  • Just to cure it,
  • 'cause I can't ignore it
  • If it's love, love
  • Makes me wanna turn around
  • and face me
  • But I don't know nothing
  • 'bout love
  • Oh, come on, come on
  • - [screams]
  • - Turn a little faster
  • Come on, come on
  • The world will follow after
  • Come on, come on
  • Everybody's after love
  • So I said
  • I'm a snowball running
  • Running down into this spring
  • that's coming all this love
  • Melting under blue skies
  • belting out sunlight
  • Shimmering love
  • Well, baby, I surrender
  • To the strawberry ice cream
  • Never ever end of all this love
  • Well, I didn't mean to do it
  • But there's no escaping your love
  • These lines of lightning
  • mean we're never alone
28; Girls by The 1975.
  • Ashton: "wrestle to the ground, god help me now; cause they're just girls."
  • "Honey!" You hear your husband scream, it startles you so bad that you roll off of the bed. "Fuck." You mumble, rubbing your head as you stumble out of your bedroom. You try to make it down the stairs as fast as you can, hearing small shrieks coming from the livingroom. "Asht...on." You laugh, looking at your husband as your little girls jump and step all over him. They'd managed to get him to the ground, which baffled you. "Please help me." He says, it's muffled due to the fact that his face is buried in the carpet. You giggle, walking over to your small family. "Alright, alright ladies. Go upstairs and make your beds for me." You stick your hands out for them to grab, they smile at you as you pull them off of their dad. After ushering them up the stairs, you crouch down in front of Ashton. "You good?" You smirk, moving his hair away from his face. "(Y/N), they ambushed me." He laughs, that god awful high pitched laugh and it makes your heart stutter. He sits up and pulls you into his lap, running his fingers up and down your exposed legs. "I feel abused." He chuckles, kissing your shoulder. "I'm just confused as to how they managed to take you down like that." You laugh, covering your mouth. "THEY AMBUSHED ME!" He repeats, throwing his arms in the air. You shake your head and stand up, and he follows suit. "You're ridiculous, they're just girls, little girls at that." You walk away giggling. He pouts and rubs the back of his neck. "Yeah, they're strong girls.."
  • Luke: "17 & a half years old, I'm worrying about my brother finding out; where's the fun in doing what you're told?"
  • "We shouldn't be doing this." You mumble, shaking your head as he holds his arms out for you. He smirks at you, snaking his arms around your waist and pulling you out of your bedroom window. "Stop worrying, if we haven't got caught yet, then we never will." He says, setting you on the ground. You shake your head at the blue haired boy, locking your hands together. You quietly make your way around the front of your house, and down the sidewalk. You two never really had a specific destination, you just walked until you were too tired to move anymore. You were just about to round the corner when you saw headlights coming down the street. "Lucas," you frown, squinting your eyes to see what color the car was. "Shit." You almost yell, pushing Luke into the nearest bush. Once the car slows down, you go completely stiff. "(Y/N)?" Your brother says from the window, frowning at you. "What the hell are you doing?" You rub your eyes and drag your hand down your face. "I can explain this." You sigh, fumbling the flannel ((his flannel)) tied around your waist. "I, uh," you stammer a little, the way he was staring at you made your palms sweat. "I had a bad dream, and I didn't wanna call you cause you were at work, so I just...came out to get some fresh air." It sounds more like a question, but your brother doesn't question it. "C'mon." He laughs, rolling his window up. You sigh, knowing you were leaving your boyfriend in the bush. You were quiet on the way home, not wanting to chance anything and say something that could potentially make your story seem faulty. "No more late night strolls, next time call me or-better yet-why didn't you just call Luke and tell him to come over?" Your eyes widen, and you snap your head in his direction. "What?" He asks, and you just shake your head. "Alright, weirdo." You make your way upstairs and into your room; sure that Luke had already made it back home at this point. You shut your door and turn off the light, curling up in the middle of your bed. You were on the brink of sleep when you heard something bump against the floor; you rolled over to see a figure. Thankfully, there was enough illumination from the street lights to let you know who was in your room. "Told you we wouldn't get caught." He whispers, kicking his shoes off and sliding in behind you. You just laugh and back into him; letting him wrap his arms around you and kiss the back of your head.
  • Michael: "A pair of frozen hands to hold, oh she's so southern so she feels the cold."
  • "I can't feel my feet." You mumble, standing in front of him as he stares down at you. "Or my face, or my ears, or my hands." You laugh, looking up at him. He smiles, leaning down to kiss your forehead. "Here." He murmurs, taking cupping your hands in between his own. You stare at your hands as he breathes on them, stuck in some kind of awe at how quick your heartbeat picked up every time he took a breath. He notices you staring at your hands and smiles, a small laugh escaping his throat. "What?" You ask, frowning a bit. He shakes his head, swearing it's nothing. "Tell me!" You stomp your foot like a child and poke your bottom lip out. "I just think it's kinda funny that you've never actually experienced a 'real' winter." He says, gesturing to the snow falling everywhere and the fact that you can see your own breath. Mikey was right, you lived in a place down south where it was hot all year round. You blush a little, realizing how correct his observation was. "Yeah, I guess you're right." Your face flushes and you pout a bit; it makes him completely swoon. He grabs your bottom lip between his thumb and index finger, tugging on it. "It's like I have my own little southern belle."
  • Calum: "I'm not your typical stoned 18 year old, gimmie a night; I'll make you."
  • You lay on your back, staring up at the ceiling as your chest rises and falls at an uneven pace. Your hair is scattered across the mattress, sheets obscured, your skin is sticky; this is such a euphoric feeling, you can still feel your body trying to ride out the last little pieces of your high as you take a handful of the sheets. "Shit." You huff, your eyes fluttering shut. You hear him laugh, turning over so that he's hovering over you for the umpteenth time that night. "You alright?" He smirks, sliding his arm around your waist as you tilt your head back in the slightest way. "I hate you for this." You huff, the warmth in your stomach starting to build back up as he nips at the exposed skin on your chest. Your toes curl and your nails rake down his back, irritating the wounds that were already there. He sucks in a sharp breath, pressing his hand onto your hip to keep you pinned to the bed. After you're done writhing and shaking underneath him, he smiles down at you. "I told you it'd be worth it." His lips ghost over yours as his grin gets wider. "All I needed was one night." You lean up to kiss him, but he pulls back and climbs out of the twin sized mattress. (You tried to use that as an excuse as to why you two shouldn't fool around, but once his lips found the spot underneath your ear, the rest was history) He slipped back into his clothes and flicked the light on. You sit up, sliding down to the foot of your bed to pull on his sweatshirt. "I'll call you." He says, crouching down in front of you. You smile, tucking lose strands of hair behind your hair. "Promise?" He laughs, pressing his lips to yours. "I promise."