i can't handle them. i can't do it

[Ficlet] Nicknames
Pairing: Dazai/Atsushi


“A what?” Atsushi slowly lowered the cup he’d brought to his lips.

Nickname, Atsushi-kun! Nicknames!” Dazai said, happily clapping his hands together and looking at Atsushi with an expectant gleam in his eyes.

“Ah,” Atsushi put down his coffee and picked up his pen again. Hopefully Dazai would leave it alone should he pretend to be busy with this report – which he was – but Dazai only leaned down further, practically hanging over Atsushi where he sat by his desk, innocently performing his duties at the Agency.

“Well, Atsushi-kun? Well?” Dazai pressed on, his tone of voice could only be described as giddy.

Atsushi’s shoulders lowered as he sighed and looked up at the other man. “Honestly, Dazai-san, I don’t really see any need for us to have nicknames for each other.”

Dazai made a sound, sounding vaguely offended, and dramatically put his hand over his heart.

“Atsushi-kun! I’m hurt! A nickname is an important pillar of any relationship!” Here he grabbed Atsushi’s hands to hold them against his chest instead, Atsushi still holding his pen in a loose grip. “Especially since I can’t make you stop with the honorific, these things are super important!”

Atsushi blinked owlishly, for the moment swayed by Dazai’s – dubiously authentic – performance while being relieved they were alone at the office at the same time.

“They are?”

Dazai nodded, encouraged by Atsushi considering the idea he grabbed a chair and sat down, leaning his elbows on the desk while still holding the other’s hands.

“Yes! We’ve been dating for – ah, three months now-“ Dazai stopped and smiled softly at him, Atsushi gave a small smile back, “- and I think we need to take this a step further.”

F-Further? You mean-?”

“Yes, nicknames! So, I’ll go first.”

“Dazai-san, I’m not sure this is necessary-“

“Kitten.”

Atsushi blinked, then frowned. “What?”

“Darling, honey, cutie pie,” Dazai kept listing names. Atsushi could feel a headache coming. He dragged his hand over his eyes and groaned.

“You’re not making any sense.”

Hmm,” Dazai made that offended noise again and Atsushi felt him taking his other hand – maybe to once again bring it to his chest and proclaim about the foundations of a functioning relationship. Atsushi peeked through his fingers and watched as Dazai elegantly held Atsushi’s hand in front of his own lips. He blew warm air over the skin, and something inside of Atsushi’s stomach fluttered.

Dazai dragged his lower lip over Atsushi’s fingers and then met his eyes. They seemed deep and warm in the sharp light of the afternoon sun.

“Sweetheart.”

The butterflies in Atsushi’s stomach turner sharper, he might’ve made a sound because Dazai’s gentle smile crooked; became smug. He leaned closer, close enough for Atsushi to catch the faint fragrance of tea and cologne over the beating of his heart that’d escalated quickly.

“Umm…”

“You like that?” Dazai’s voice sounded smooth despite his smile, his eyes twinkled. “Sweetheart?”

A furious blush stretched against his cheeks, Atsushi could feel it. The more it grew the bigger the grin on Dazai’s face widened, and Atsushi felt a strange feeling of losing – what he didn’t know, only that it frustrated him. He tried for a response but could only sputter helplessly.

Dazai chuckled and released his hand. “So that’s it, huh?” He said victoriously.

Atsushi jerked his head up and took hold of Dazai’s hands in a poor imitation of Dazai’s earlier actions. Heart in his mouth Atsushi said with a slightly squeaky but serious voice:

“My love.”

Dazai froze. He looked from their intertwined hands up to Atsushi’s determined face. Unblinking, he opened his mouth, then closed it.

“Well,” Dazai rasped and tried clearing his throat, “that’s it then.”

He got up, strange expression on his face, and then walked towards the exit.

“Dazai? Where are you going?” Kunikida met him in the door, looking up from his bunt of papers at Dazai’s retreating back.

“Oh, nothing. Just going to question the meaning of life!” Dazai answered, his laughter stiff.

What?” Kunikida yelled after him. He turned his head and stared hard at Atsushi. “What happened!?”

Then he stopped and, stupefied, looked down at his papers, “and why am I even acting surprised?

Atsushi groaned and hit his head on the desk.

anonymous asked:

I've had this girl in my ethics class for the last 5 weeks who's always really irritated me for some unknown irrational reason and this week she came in wearing a camo bomber jacket and red lipstick and it hit me like a punch in the gut. im so attracted to her. that's why im on edge every time she speaks she's so beautiful I can't physically handle it and the only response im capable of is anger. now that I've figured it out I can't stop staring please send help how do I tell someone I love them

oh honey that’s really gay

6

I headcanon Bokuto to be the type of person who is a literal furnace and wears T-shirts all year round, whereas Akaashi has perpetually cold hands.

4

cute bare faced jiyongie all bundled up (๑>◡<๑)

6

#when it gets ‘real’ for seth

Socks mystify me. Like, seriously, how do I end up with so many single socks in the wash? So many clean lonely socks, waiting to be reunited with their matches. Some of them waiting for weeks, hiding behind piles of clean laundry or books or toys, or whatever the fuck else my kids pile up on their dresser and desk. I have small children who own a million socks in different, distinct patterns. It’s just pairing up socks, it’s not rocket science! I should be able to do better.

Cheating Sentence Starters
  • "I'm sick of being your little secret!"
  • "I can't do this anymore."
  • "You were supposed to be out tonight.."
  • "The way he/she looks at you.. I can't believe you're wiling to ruin that."
  • "I'm done being your booty call."
  • "It feels wrong, doing this with you."
  • "I didn't mean for you to find out this way."
  • "Don't tell me you're actually starting to grow a conscience?"
  • "He/She's going to be out all night. Come over?"
  • "Shit! He/She's here! Hide!"
  • "That's all I am to you? Your side whore?"
  • "I hate seeing you two be all coupley in public when I'M the one you're fucking."
  • "Don't you feel guilty at all?"
  • "But you have a girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband..."
  • "I want to leave him/her. I want to be with you. I just can't yet."
  • "You're my best friend's boyfriend/girlfriend--I can't do this to him/her."
  • "I told him/her I was going on a business trip."
  • "Do you have any idea how awkward it is to have him/her confide in me about how he/she thinks you're cheating--when I'M the one you're cheating with."
  • "You're the only person I'm with, why would I lie to you?"
  • "Alright, where is he/she?! Where are they hiding?!"
  • "We can't keep doing this.."
  • "Are you screwing him/her?"
  • "I don't know what to think, I just know what I saw!"
  • "Be honest with me. Are you cheating on me with him/her?"
  • "I can't believe you'd do something like this! Was I not good enough?!"
  • "He/She can't do it like I do. That's why you keep coming back."
  • "...Who is he/she?"
  • "I can't be responsible for ruining a relationship."
  • "Don't pretend I acted alone on this, it takes two to tango."
  • "He/She found out."
  • "Meet me in the locker room during free period? He/She had a test."
  • "Meet me at the hotel tonight?"
  • "I can't handle them anymore! They're practically driving me to cheat!"
  • "How do you sleep at night?"
  • "W-What's going on here?"
  • "It's not what you think!"

So I have this headcanon that while Newt does scold his creatures when they’re being naughty, it’s Tina that usually does the scolding, especially if Newt has done something especially dangerous without her knowing. He always goes for the “feign innocence” like his creatures tend to do. Tina doesn’t ever fall for this.

anonymous asked:

There's an expectation that Vanity Fair will have another Star Wars centered issue with photographs by Annie Leibovitz like with TFA. My question is, if we do and we get a portrait of Adam and Daisy in character together, would that be giving too much away?

I’m SO GLAD you asked me this because I’ve put A LOT of thought into the Vanity Fair shoot, and post-Celebration my predictions have definitely evolved in a more reylo-positive direction (before, for example, I was focused more on how this shoot would be the first reveal of Kylo’s maskless face/scar and look how wrong I was about THAT, in a good way lol).

personally, I think the chance that we’ll get a portrait of JUST Adam and Daisy together is extremely low, like 1%. I think they’re fine with hinting at story points (and it’s not exactly a secret that Adam filmed in Ireland with Mark and Daisy), but they won’t want to give the game away THAT much. they’re always doing this careful tiptoeing dance around addressing the relationship/dynamic between Rey and Kylo, despite the fact that it was central to TFA and will continue to be to the ST as a whole moving forward. until they show their hand with where they’re going with it, I think they’re going to continue doing that.

HOWEVER, after that poster (!!!!!), there’s an EXTREMELY good chance we’ll get a group picture of Mark, Daisy, and Adam, and also a good chance that that picture might be the cover photo. my reasoning is basically:

  • it’d be a major waste to NOT put that gorgeous Irish scenery on the cover
  • the poster has already introduced the concept of the three of them sharing the force thread of the storyline, so it wouldn’t be giving anything more than that away
  • putting just Mark and Daisy on the cover might carry certain implications they want to start gently steering the audience away from
  • putting Mark and Adam in the same picture plants the reminder in people’s heads that this is the tragic family backstory we’re getting, that they’re very much related and that something mysterious happened between them that this movie will reveal

this is just my wild speculation, take it with a grain of salt, etc. but if Celebration showed us anything, it’s that they’re not afraid to show us Kylo’s face, they’re not afraid to make him look beautiful and sad and more conflicted than ever, and they’re not afraid to plant the idea in our heads that Kylo, Rey, and Luke will be spending a good portion of the movie together.

I can’t say this hard enough because I am so angry

UNFRIENDLY REMINDER THAT KIMBALL HAS ADMITTED TO WORKING AGAINST DOYLE AND BASED DECISIONS ABOUT THE RUNNING OF THE ARMIES ON THE FACT THAT SHE DOESN’T LIKE HIM AND THEM

UNFRIENDLY REMINDER THAT OF THE TWO, KIMBALL IS THE ONE LIKELY TO MAKE A PETTY, SPITEFUL DECISION ABOUT DOYLE BECAUSE SHE HAS CANONICALLY BEEN MAKING THEM THIS WHOLE TIME

AND WHILE WE’RE AT IT

REMINDER THAT DOYLE WAS JUST A SECRETARY AND ONLY BECAME GENERAL BECAUSE LITERALLY EVERYONE ABOVE HIM BAILED BUT INSTEAD OF ALSO BAILING HE STAYED AND LED THE ARMY BECAUSE HIS PEOPLE NEEDED A LEADER, AND HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN BAD AT IT BUT HE HAS BEEN TRYING AND HE NEEDS TO BE GIVEN SO MUCH MORE CREDIT THAN HE IS

SO STOP FUCKING SHITTING ON DOYLE FOR A DECISION THAT HE HASN’T EVEN FUCKING MADE YET JUST BECAUSE THE FANDOM AS A WHOLE CAN’T ACCEPT THAT KIMBALL MIGHT ACTUALLY BE IN THE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING

THIS MAKES ME SO FUCKING ANGRY I CAN’T EVEN

newsflash!!

i have no idea what i’m doing 

Gordon Ramsay {Sentence Starters}
  • "I have an earnest desire to get things absolutely right."
  • "The time we have together is quality, rather than quantity."
  • "Get yourself out of your comfort zone. It's a great learning experience."
  • "Some can handle it, and some can't. I'm not interested in the ones who can't."
  • "I'll often say certain things just to motivate people or to get something else out of them."
  • "You're making me mad. Fucking mad."
  • "Forecast for tomorrow? 100 percent chance of tears."
  • "Do you want a fucking medal?"
  • "I wouldn't resort to cannibalism, never mind if I was starving."
  • "From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion."
  • "You know, I have a rough side. I have a smooth side."
  • "I could never maintain a relationship with a vegetarian. Their breath is just too smelly."
  • "My gran could do better! And she's DEAD!"
  • "I have to laugh when someone calls me a ______. I've been called far worse than that."
  • "I wish you'd jump in the oven. That'd make my life a lot easier."
  • "You've now just confirmed in my mind you're not trustworthy."
Things The Signs Have Confessed To Me
  • Aries: sometimes I wish I could feel bad for other people but I just don't, so I feel really selfish because I want to understand, I really do but my best just isn't enough.
  • Taurus: I sometimes wonder if you really do like me, I know it doesn't show but I care a whole awful lot about what other people think and it is really hard not to.
  • Gemini: I repeat to myself I am okay and happy being alone and by myself but I always find myself wishing I had someone to be with, no matter how hard I try not to.
  • Cancer: I am tired of being "the nice one" or "the cute one", because I am never the smart one. I make everybody laugh and get along great with everyone but I can be smart too and I wish people could see that because sometimes they make me feel like maybe I really am not smart.
  • Leo: I know people think I am pretty but I just can't feel it. My ex boyfriend once told me I was the most selfish person he has ever met, and that was a year ago and it has stuck with me a lot because it is one of the things that has hurt me more in my life. I am tired of being selfish. I do not want to be.
  • Virgo: sometimes I want to talk about what I feel and think but am always looking out after others and feel like I have to be in control. I sometimes wish I could be angry or go overboard and cry or vent to someone but I never allow myself to do that. I don't know how to not be in control.
  • Libra: I feel so dumb, like the only thing everyone sees in me is "pretty". Boys flirt with me and all but they just want me for my body/looks, and I always hold this really small hope that when they get to know me maybe they'll see something else, but they never do. I end up feeling that I'm only worthy for my looks and I am tired of people not seeing past that.
  • Scorpio: I feel like I have to pay for my mistakes, I think that I have made terrible mistakes that deserve no forgiveness but sometimes I wish they deserved it and that I could find it somewhere. I feel like everyone is better than me, I'm never good enough.
  • Sagittarius: I am tired of feeling everything so intensely. Of being so angry, so sad, so in love, so what ever I am feeling. I drink or smoke or have sex to find a way out of feeling whatever I am feeling but it remains and it doesn't matter what it is, it is always intense and draining.
  • Capricorn: things just keep on piling up and I don't know what to do. I can never truly handle anything and maybe I should just start getting used to the fact that I can't fix things, but it hurts and I just can't see anything clearly.
  • Aquarius: I judge people harshly and act like I don't care but I feel like the worst person in the world, I don't deserve anything, I just suck. I wish I could be nicer to people because they don't deserve to be treated like I treat them sometimes, I just want to stop.
  • Pisces: why do people do things to me when they know they are hurting me? What did I ever do to them? I don't want to feel sad over these things anymore, I've been trying not to feel so bad and to be rational but it just hurts and I don't understand why everyone seems to be hurting me on purpose.