Langst for the fandom. I don’t know if this qualifies as a drabble, because I’m not sure of the length on those. Loosely based on ‘Scars to Your Beautiful’ because I mentioned makeup and all I could think of after was the line ‘covergirls don’t cry’.
He’d hurt them. He always did in the end. Get a little too careless at just the wrong moment, forget to think before he acted just once- all leading to broken bones, tense emotions, and shattered hearts. He’d always been better at taking things apart than putting them back together.
So what do you do?
Laugh when you want to scream.
Jest when you want to be silent.
Smile when you want to cry.
Because all your life you’ve watched your sisters apply makeup upon makeup and make it look natural- so if they can do it with product you can do it with emotion. It’s all in the brushstrokes and the blending. It’s about trial and error and working until its effortless. It’s about practice, day in and day out until you can’t seem to quite remember who the person is underneath the lies. Because that’s what you’re telling, no- showing the world. Lies. Deceit. Your fake emotions and feelings wrapped up neatly with a pretty bow for everyone to notice, all while you lay raw underneath begging for a release that no one wants to see. Because covergirls don’t cry, and neither do sharpshooters.
Because beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and you know that you’re not beautiful- not even close. You’re superficial and invincible, all with a class clown attitude and an easy smile. Hell, how long has it been since you last smiled? Truthfully, easily, without prompting or pressure? How long has affection been your awaited spoil of a day that never seems to come?
You worry about and crave the day that someone takes the time to look at you closely, because even makeup is noticeable if you look at the skin carefully enough. The day you find someone who won’t break when you slip. Who take what bad luck and twisted fate you bring them with ease and grace. Who fall and get up again. Who greet you with a smile and open arms.
Who you’d willingly surrender your life for.
Because honestly, you love life even if it doesn’t love you back.
You want it more than anything you know- that single person who makes you believe that you are worth the sun, moon, stars, and the galaxies. Who tells you every single day that you are gorgeous without the makeup and the mask and the lies and the deceit. Who holds you close while the tears stream down your face, because they’ve broken that unspoken rule- they’ve told you that covergirls are allowed to cry- more importantly so are sharpshooters…
. . . And for once you find it in you to listen.