i can't be your girlfriend

It’s hilarious dealing with idiots who genuinely hate gay people and think that everyone else will also be insulted by being linked to gay things….

“Go watch some Ellen!”
Yeah alright cool, she’s hilarious

“Stay in the gay bars!”
Man I wish

“You dress like a lesbian”
Thanks! I’ve spent years cultivating this style!

“Go back to pride you liberal hippy!”
I actually love everything you just said

You should be here with me, being squished together and sleeping peacefully…
Instead, I’m writing this post.
—  If you were here I wouldn’t of needed to post this

Acid roasting Thorgy:

“Thorgy, I don’t know why the fuck I’m roasting you, I don’t know if it’s because your fucking birthday or your fucking funeral, and you’re moving away” *knocks angrily on the pulpit* You’re leaving Brooklyn again on this amazing journey with Well Strung and leaving us alone, and you’re gonna be incredible, but don’t worry about me because I’ll be hosting all your shows so thank you"

and then they share a peck

when you buy something used, please clean it energetically. also do that with “gifts” from people you don’t fully trust.

Me listening to The Adventure Zone for the first time: Hmmm I don’t know. It’s just kinda goofy. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get into it.

Also me listening to The Adventure Zone at 4am in the morning when I have to be at work in 3 hours in pain from laughing: SEND HALP.

anonymous asked:

Do you have anything for a "I kinda hate you but your girlfriend is my best friend and I can't stand to see her hurt so now I have to keep you from killing yourself because I won't hear the end of it" kind of relationship

AIGHT! I’m sorry for going MIA for a few days, I was working all weekend then I was done for and have been resting, BUT I’M BACK HI <3

This is so specific so I won’t have the best ideas but bear with me here;

TRIGGER WARNING: suicidal attempts and suicidal thoughts

This is sensitive topic. I’ve been there. I’m not trying to disrespect anyone here, just remember that. Also sorry these may not fit your request, it’s just I’ve been in a depressive fit lately and this turned into a kind of a vent to myself <3

  • “Look, you may be an asshole but your her asshole for some reason, so I’m not letting you do this, hand me the knife.”
  • “Maybe we got off the wrong foot. I didn’t know you were suffering like this. I’m sorry, okay? Don’t do this, don’t leave her.“
  • “I’m not going to tell you not to but consider this; You have so many things to try okay? Cut your hair, go to fun places, connect with strange people, dress how you like! Life’s short, you’re proving that right now. But why not have a little fun first, huh? Love the people in your life, it’s worth it, and please love yourself.”
  • “Hey, this isn’t you. This is an illness in your head messing with you. Don’t listen to it, you are loved. You are not your mental illness.”
  • “Maybe you sometimes do questionable things, but so does everyone! We’re all flawed, that’s the beauty of it.”
  •  “Let’s pause for a second and get some tea and chocolate. We don’t even have to talk about it, we can talk about anything you’d like. You like space? I have so many fun facts to share, okay, did you know…”
  • “What’s your favorite movie? Go get it and I’ll get some blankets and glasses of water, let’s not think too much, just watch it.”
  • “Don’t you dare! You may get on my nerves but you don’t deserve that so stop!”
  • “Hey, listen to me, it’s just us, just us and this space. Take a deep breath, another one, remember that pretty lake we saw a few months ago? That was amazing, there are so many pretty things out there to enjoy. Just breathe that in okay? Think about that lake, so peaceful, so beautiful. Breathe with the ripples in the water. Calm and steady, there we go. You’re okay.”
  • “I guess you’re okay, I mean you do have some good qualities. Want to start over? Let’s find something we have in common, huh? Maybe, we’ll be the best of friends!”

The Librarians meme  ⇒ Three Relationships [2/3]
Cassandra Cillian x Eve Baird (Casseve)

“Please don’t say I’m like your mother.”
“No, nothing like that.”


chu learns how to gif: lauren lewis in 3x13