Sometimes I still get these urges to contact you.
It feels like pure desperation… Like my skin is crawling and my eyes are burning and I just want you back in my life so badly….
And I don’t know why? Where these sudden urges come from?
Why do I still do this, even after all this time?!
It’s like I'm getting out, I'm almost clear…. and then suddenly I feel like I would do absolutely anything just to have you back in my life again.
Even for a single moment…. Just to see you, talk to you - ANYTHING!
It’s like I don’t WANT to be out, I still want to be in love with you because in my mind, loving you equates to happiness and I just want that back… just for one second.
But I have to remind myself it’s not healthy.
Loving you is not like it used to be - it's not real anymore.
It’s not happy, it’s not positive…. and it’s gone and I can’t go back.
All I can do is put the phone down, blink back the tears … and keep moving forward.
oh, we can talk about my family. i am an unplanned only child. my mom is a sexologist, my dad is a psychologist. they never loved me. they were only concerned about one another and their sex life. i come from a shit town called mjøndalen, and fled as soon as i was fifteen. fled to madrid. i talk to them once a month. they are happy without me. i am happy without them. i don’t have siblings. i already told you that, so…your turn.
the worst part is, I didn’t do anything to cause you to leave me. I didn’t betray you, wrong you, or harm you. and this is worse, because it means that you just decided one day that I wasn’t worth having anymore.
I get that not everyone likes Darvey or the idea of Darvey.. But honestly...
When people say that Harvey doesn’t like her “that way” it feels like they’re missing the whole point of Harvey’s character and growth. The show made pretty clear that he’s attracted to her, we saw that the first time they met, we saw that when they slept together, we saw that during 4x15, when they were on that couch, we saw that when he dreamed about her naked.. So what are you even talking about? Every character on the show has made allusions about Darvey. You don’t put those lines in the show if you want to potray a one sided relationship. So why some people are still talking about it? Like when Mike said “You guys finally decided to take the plunge.”. Characters ON THE SHOW, see them as a something ambigous\romantic\weird. No one sees Donna has the woman desperate for love. I think everyone can see that Harvey is emotionally unavailable, and that their “weird” relationship will probably go nowhere because of that. Not because Harvey looks at her like a sister. The show made pretty clear that he’s not in touch with his feelings, so yes, when people say that Donna wanted him but he didn’t i feel confused. ??? They had a CONVERSATION about the fact that something had happened and she wanted to place it, she wanted to figure it out, she didn’t ask him for a relationship, she didn’t say “Let’s be together”. The show made it clear. Donna left because he couldn’t have that conversation with her, not because he didn’t love her back. She didn’t know what she wanted, and she didn’t know what he wanted either. She just tried to have a conversation. She left because she couldn’t handle the ambiguity anymore. He can look at her that way.. That’s the whole point. We’ve seen THREE women for Harvey. Zoe, Scottie and Donna. All their stories are kinda similar. History, complicated feelings, possibilities.. And you know what else is similar? Harvey. He wasn’t ready to fight for Zoe, he wasn’t ready to fight for Scottie, and he wasn’t ready to be with Donna. It’s a pattern. The whole Darvey drama happened in s5 because he can look at her that way, and he does, but he’s just not ready to deal with it. Donna would’ve never left if she was sure he didn’t love her. She left because she knows that he could. And Harvey didn’t even deny it. When he dreamed about her naked in his bed… He was happy. Because he knows he could be happy. But he couldn’t even admit that it was Donna. He was in total denial about what Donna could be for him. Donna is representation of his issues. She triggered his panic attacks. And I know it was about his mother, but he started to deal with it the moment Donna left, she’s the trigger. And saying that he just doesn’t love her like that is like not understanding his issues. s5 was about that. His issues are there because of his past, and he’s starting to deal with it because and for Donna. Hopefully he’ll be ready soon.
Summary: You have a chance encounter with Jensen Ackles on your flight home to Boston. The two of you chat for awhile and find that you’re drawn to each other, but how can an average college student and a famous actor bridge the gap between their vastly different worlds? Between the distance and a number of setbacks, who knows how things will work out…
It’s 4:03, and I can’t sleep without you next to me I toss and turn like the sea.
If I drown tonight, Bring me back to life, breathe your breath in me. The only thing that I still believe in is you.
If you only knew..