i can't be all negative

2

time to dance // panic! at the disco

2

I Can’t Think Straight (2008)

Context: Leyla, a Muslim British-Indian woman, is coming out to her mother, telling her “I’m gay.” Her mother reacts with horror and disgust, telling her “You’re up to your neck in sin” and going so far as to ask “Who did this to you?”

But it’s this scene that sums up the reality of LGBTQ+ desi youth. Our parents may very well love us and want the best for us, but the absolute bottom line is: our parents do not want us to be happy. They want us to be appropriate, to be respectful, to have children and well-earning careers, to fit into the mold of heteronormativity and gender roles, to be religious and pious. But no, they do not want us to be happy. Happiness doesn’t fit into it. To them, happiness is indistinguishable as a separate characteristic because according to them, doing all of these things should already be making us happy. The ideal created for desi children is that they shouldn’t strive to do what makes them happy, but what makes them “good.” Unfortunately, under this context, good is defined as anything that isn’t seen as immoral or out of the norm. 

A woman who is not straight is rejecting her role as a wife, and to a lesser extent, her role as a mother. She is rejecting the notion of subservience to men, of obedience and inferiority. Under our current system that is hugely patriarchal, a woman who does not submit is a threat. 

Now, I’m not saying desi parents are bad parents or hate their children because it’s pretty clear this happens in nearly every other culture in the world. But I am saying that desi parents do not make their children’s happiness a priority, they make their children’s success a priority: successful careers and marriages and children = successful lives. So if you ask a desi parent “do you want your kid to be happy?” they’ll immediately say “yes, of course.” But if you add on “do you want your kid to be gay if that makes them happy?” the answer will be a lot less positive.

This movie tackled Leyla’s sexuality and coming out to her parents absolutely head-on with no coyness about it. She goes straight up to her mother and admits that she’s a lesbian. But her mother’s reaction is really the thing that most “coming out” stories try to gloss over, or sugarcoat, or just in general avoid. Her mother admits with frank and brutal honesty the truth that all LGBTQ+ desi kids know: our parents would rather see us miserable and straight than queer and happy.

Without wanting to sound arrogant, I don’t particularly want to know what viewers think of me- and I don’t believe it does you any favours, knowing that people really like you or really hate you. I’m just happy to get on with doing what I do. I’m just doing my job, which is something I thoroughly enjoy.
—  Ryan Hawley speaking to my soul

anonymous asked:

Hi, I love drawing with all my heart, it relaxes me and is an outlet for all my negative emotions, but I can't help but compare myself to others, especially amazing artists on tumblr (like you) and people who are much younger but seem more talented :( do u have any advice?

Don’t compare yourself to other artists… you’ll have a bad time. Instead, compare your previous work and try to improve each time.

Do see and watch other artists & learn from their work and experience though!

<3,

Toonimated

Originally posted by sevmedin

  • Anxiety: Why are we never invited to parties??? No one likes us!!!
  • Logic: In order to be invited to parties, you have to talk to more than 4 people.
  • Anxiety: haha lol that ain't happening
  • Logic: But-
  • Anxiety: LOL
  • Anxiety: But seriously why aren't we invited to parties
  • Logic: *looks into the camera like it's on the office*

When you see someone being an idiot and an ass about something/to someone and you check the op and they’re from your fandom/the same ship.. And you just have to close your eyes and take a deep breath to calm down… But you just can’t help but think “Dear god this is why we have such a bad reputation and everyone hates us”

Maybe there isn’t someone to tell you good night at the moment, but the moon will always be watching over you until someone does 🌙

Mark Gatiss, a gay man, has repeatedly stated a “certain ship” isn’t going to happen in the show. He does not deserve to be crucified by this fandom because a certain group of people are mad that he was telling the truth!

So go tweet him something nice! Or any of the sherlock creators for that matter. You know what? Yes, the episode had some issues, but they don’t deserve to be yelled at by conspiracy theorists! 

Here are some other highlights since you all seem to be enjoying it 😄

Once he realized Isaiah is the OldSpice guy: “if they don’t show Luke’s bathroom with a bottle of OldSpice, i don’t even want to watch it”

“What’s with the full names? Are the all British?”

When Maryse asked Alec where he was going: “He’s going to his boyfriend’s house to get drunk because you’re all useless”

Once he got there: “ha! Magnus knew he was coming so he just happend to be shirtless and sweaty 👀”

“I bet he rehearsed that apology for 5 hours in front of the mirror”

“Luke looks like Nathan Drake with that holster and the shirt. I like him, he’s badass”

“Everyone’s gay until proven otherwise”

my dad’s gf and my mum’s ex used to make me feel stoopid all the time growing up and it continues to be my biggest berserk button like??? don’t talk down to me??? Especially when I’m learning sumn new like trust me I’m gonna Get It. And pointing out someone’s accidents (not errors) in real time as really is a classic shitty person trademark IMO

can ya’ll believe that the man i’m in love with quoted alec fucking lightwood (without ever seeing shadowhunters) and made my heart burst? yes, that happend and yes, i am madly in love with him :’) 💖

anonymous asked:

Hey I'm sorry to ask you to find the same post again, but would you mind linking me to the ask that you answered with the more respectful Katie McGrath blogs please? I really can't take the negativity all over my dash, it's just so rude, and disrespectful of her as a person??

Absolutely! Here are a couple for you as I have gotten the question more than once. Some names are repeated of course, but that’s ok 😅

Post 1

Post 2

On my most recent response, I also asked fans to make themselves known if they were peaceful shippers/respectful fans. My lovelies @caitlinsnowqueen @supersunnydanvers @dejectedlamb @protectlenaluthor have also spoken up saying that they are peaceful blogs so give them a peek as well!

And of course, anyone that is not listed in either of these lists, if you are a peaceful and respectful Katie McGrath fan/blog and want to make more friends, feel free to comment, reblog, like, whatever you wish! Make yourselves known!