i can sob all day over this

Avengers Preference: How They Handle Your Death

a/n: the first request of the avenge-these-imagines NYE Request Extravaganza! (if you can think of a better name, I’m all ears, lol). enjoy!

warnings: grief, death of the reader

Thor- upon news of your death, Thor seemingly vanishes into thin air. he travels into some far-reaching corner of the universe to be alone with his grief, and the entirety of Asgard mourns their fallen princess. when he finally returns, he is much more solemn, far less brash, and only returns to Midgard when absolutely necessary. he can’t stand the realm that was once lit up by your beautiful smile, and the way it has moved on without you.

Bruce Banner/Hulk- when Bruce watches you get shot on what was supposed to be a simple, low danger recon mission, he almost completely loses his humanity. the thought of that last laugh lighting up your face right before the bullet entered you was too much for him to deal with in his human form, so the Hulk takes over. Natasha finds him in a cave in the mountains and sings him his lullaby, and she holds him as he deals with his grief for the first time.

Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow- you were the only thing keeping Natasha from reverting into her former cold assassin self, and after your death she becomes hell-bent on revenge. calculatingly killing each and every person involved in her loss.

Clint Barton/Hawkeye- people are shocked at how well Clint takes the news of your death, as he seems to be his usual self (though unwilling to talk about you). one night while Tony is restlessly wandering the halls of the tower, he finds Clint in your room, holding your favorite jacket and sobbing. he never mentions it to Clint, but the next day there is a sad understanding in the eyes of the team, and they all drink to your memory and share stories about you.

Tony Stark/Iron Man- Tony throws himself into his work, mainlining caffeine as a replacement for sleep. on the fourth straight day, Bruce steadies him as he almost falls over in the lab. when he demands that Tony get some rest, Tony responds, “I can’t. there’s a cold, empty space where she used to sleep. the nightmares are unbearable. I can’t sleep until I can make something to protect those I love, so I never have to feel this way again.” after that, Bruce begins staying up with him.

Steve Rogers/Captain America- Steve deals with your passing in the somber, steady way he dealt with all of his other losses. he can’t get drunk, but that doesn’t stop him from drinking his way through Tony’s liquor cabinet. nobody ever mentions it, but suddenly there’s a section dedicated to you in Steve’s museum exhibit, with some of your favorite belongings. the donation sign merely reads “forever my girl -SR”

Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier- after your death, everyone treats Bucky warily, worried that he’ll lose himself again, but Bucky stays strong. Steve doesn’t tell about the nights they spend sitting up, with Bucky too afraid to sleep because he’s worried he’ll awake with no memories of you.

Sam Wilson/Falcon- ever the rational one, Sam goes to a grief counselor after losing you. he knows that you would want him to deal with this in the healthiest way possible, and he gives back as much as he can in your memory.

Pietro and Wanda Maximoff/Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch- the twins are no strangers to loss, but the loss of you really wrecks them. they find solace in each other, becoming even more isolated and reliant on their sibling, because they are acutely aware that the things they love most can be ripped from them at a moment’s notice.

13 Reasons Why: Trigger Scenes

For those of you interested in watching this show but fear that certain scenes within the series might cause you harm. I’ve compiled a list of the start & end times of certain scenes that may be too graphic. Below the cut I’ve also decide to include a transcript of important voiceovers that happen during the scenes themselves that you may want to read (but not if you believe they might harm you emotionally) for plot purposes. So just fyi there will obviously be spoilers below the cut lol. I’m pretty certain I got all the majorly triggering scenes, however this whole series does contain little potentially triggering things including: Bullying, slut-shaming, closeted-gay, a second suicide attempt that isn’t explicitly shown but mentioned in the 12th and 13th episodes. So Please take the utmost precaution when watching this series. 

But with all that said, I do hope you enjoy it. I’m tagging those who either replied, reblogged, or liked my original post on the subject so that they can find this easily. 

@madelyne-pryor @sublimelem0n @dana-in-wonderland 
@decembervesalius @dominoswif @whoaheather

Episode 9 – Sexual Assault

1. 31:20 – 32:40 

This scene sets up the assault scene and has a semi-misleading depiction of who the attacker is. The scene shows no actual assault but alludes to what will happen next. For safety’s sake do not view this scene if you are easily triggered by the theme of sexual assault. 

2. 38:50 – 42:35

This scene depicts the full assault. The time I’ve listed above starts and ends at the safest spot to skip to. However, if you are feeling okay enough to watch everything in the scene except the actual assault those times are 40:20 – 41:30. But again please be very careful and don’t push yourself too much. Your mental health is the priority here. This scene is told from the point of view of Hannah Baker hiding in a closet. 

3. 46:40 – 47:02

This is another semi prelude scene to the assault. It shows someone attempting to stop the assault, but failing and giving up. 

4. 50:20 – 51:20 

This is another scene of the assault, however this time it depicts a flashback from the point of view of the victim of the assault rather than Hannah’s account of it. This scene is intensely more graphic than Hannah’s pov, and I extremely urge you to take caution with this scene.  

Episode 12 – Sexual Assault and Child Abuse

5. 00:40 – 01:10

There is a brief but immediate flashforward scene depicting flashes of the assault. This begins immediately after the credits play so please be very careful here. 

6. 42:15 – 47:30

The assault itself doesn’t take up the entire time that I’ve listed, but it cuts in and out with Clay confronting the rapist, including a very bloody fight. So I figured the safest way to avoid the triggering scene would be to avoid that whole sequence. However after the ‘end time’ I listed Clay does get the rapist to finally admit he did it. But if you do not want to see this either please skip to 50:25. If you would like to see the Clay-Only scene also these are those times: 43:30 – 45:45.

7. 51:00 – 52:25

This scene involves one of the characters being choked by the boyfriend of their mother. Please view with caution.

Episode 13 – Suicide 

8. 35:45 – 38:53

This is inarguably the most graphic scene in the entire series and really in a show period that I’ve personally seen. So please take extreme caution if you are going to try and view this scene. On the one hand I believe it was important because non-suicidal people need to see it so they can understand what it’s really like. They need to be forced out of their comfort zone so they don’t just continue ignoring things like this and say shit like “It was their choice; Nothing ____ could have done” and “Suicide is selfish” But if you are suicidal or have ever been suicidal I please urge you not to watch this scene if it may cause you harm. Please be cautious and safe. Your mental health is super important. No movie or show is worth jeopardizing it. In the times above I’ve included everything from the moment she enters the bathroom to right after her body is found by her parents. 

Keep reading

BTS Reactions - They make you cry during a fight

Warning - May be upsetting to some readers

Your throat burns as you and your boyfriend scream at each other, fighting over the way he’d let this girl practically grope him in the shop. He’s telling you that it didn’t even matter, that he doesn’t even know who she is. But your point is that he shouldn’t be letting random girls press themselves up against him when you’re standing right there. You yell at him that he’s a horrible person, and he yells the words you’ve always been scared of,

“Maybe if you didn’t look so awful, I wouldn’t want other girls against me!” His eyes harden even further as the words seem to echo off the walls. Tears prick at your eyes as you cover your mouth with your hands. He says nothing, only looking at you as you begin to cry. You turn away and leave the room, sobbing as you feel all your insecurities flood back into your body.

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I literally just had to stop in the middle of my shower because of this but here’s some headcanons thank u for 1.2K followers!

🎈HC that when Eddie dies the losers all still hear his voice

🎈they think they’re just imagining him saying “you’re gonna eat that off the floor, richie, seriously? Do you even KNOW how many germs that has on it?”

🎈this happens ALL THE TIME, they’re mostly just think they’re subconsciously judging themselves for being gross

🎈but then some time goes by and the complaining turns into things like “I wish I weren’t dead” and “I really miss you guys”

🎈and then once or twice hysterical,heartbreaking sobbing

🎈everyone thinks they’re imagining it cause they miss him

🎈until one day at the quarry richie snaps “shut the fuck up, Eds, find someone else to give a TED talk to” after a long monologue on how bad cigarettes are

🎈everybody stops at all once, and Richie goes pale when he realizes what he’s said and starts stumbling over excuses

🎈“you hear him too?” Mike asks, looking relieved

🎈”wait you can hear me?!” Eddie shouts

🎈and it turns out Eddie is in a Danny Phantom situation, stuck between alive and not

🎈eddie makes the most of his invisibility by doing funny shit like beating up the bowers gang

🎈there was also that candy bar richie made him steal (“no Bev & Richie I’m not using my ghost status for stealing u cigarettes if you want lung cancer you’re gonna have to pay for it yourself you fucking dumbasses”)

🎈also Eddie talks to Georgie for Bill, sometimes, like a mediator between the dead and living. Bill never quite manages to look directly where Georgie is, but it’s close enough

🎈feel free to add onto this!

anonymous asked:

Boing! Boing! I saw you recommend some good non au fics. I love non au and I'm really in the mood for angst. Can I get some non au angst with a happy ending fics. I'm weird sorry AISHSISNAI

i got yoooouuuuu!!!

Four Times Around the Sun by KookieKoo


GENRE: Fluff, angst



SUMMARY: “Jimin,” said the other male after several minutes, “you can’t do that to Jungkook, you know? You can’t just push him away and expect him to understand it.”

Jimin sighed heavily and ran his hands through his hair, frustrated and confused. He looked at Taehyung, overcome with guilt. The other male looked right back at him, straight in the eye. Jimin was not surprised to see the anger blazing in those eyes.

“It hurts, Jimin. A lot . Being pushed away and ignored without having a clue of what you did wrong. You can’t treat people like that.”

“I know Tae, I know.”

[Or: Taehyung is in love with Hoseok, who carries a torch for Jimin, who is head over heels for Jungkook, who wants someone he knows he can never have.]

Hold Me Til We Fall In Love by ClosingStatement


GENRE: Angst, hurt/comfort



SUMMARY: “Do you? Do you love him, Jungkook?” Namjoon’s voice is quieter now; gentler. It wraps around Jungkook as dry sobs run throughout his body.

“God, yes- yes. I love him, hyung,” Jungkook all but blubbers into the fabric. His heart feels like it’s bleeding out, but it’s the best Jungkook has felt in four days.

“Then why did you never say anything?”

The One That Got Away (Almost) by (orphan account)


GENRE: Angst



SUMMARY: Jungkook never thought he’d be in this situation.

We Don’t Talk Anymore by Nochucomethru


GENRE: Angst



SUMMARY: A year ago Jungkook would have pushed Jimin away, purposely closing himself off from Jimin’s affection. But as he watched him play with Hoseok on the set for their new music video, he felt sad that Jimin wasn’t next to him, bugging him like he always used to.

He wasn’t jealous of the other members. Not at all. He was more upset at himself. Angry for rejecting Jimin all those times when now all he wanted was his attention. He had been so selfish.

Wild by drpuffles


GENRE: Angst


WARNINGS: Homophobia, biphobia

SUMMARY: Jungkook doesn’t like boys.

At least, that’s what he’s been telling himself.

again. by hellodarknessmyoldbud

RATING: Not rated

GENRE: Angst, fluff


WARNINGS: Self-harm

SUMMARY: jimin is taken to the hospital that night.

and then it’s silent.

Stone Heart (Rise) by fifthagust


GENRE: Angst, romance


WARNINGS: Eating disorders

SUMMARY: “He’s doing good, you know”, Taehyung says. It seems as if he’s considering something else carefully, so Jungkook waits, “he, uh, he wanted too many things, I think. But he’s ready now”, warmth floats his entire being at the words.

Just a Little Too Late

Dean x Reader

Summary: Dean has to decide to save you or Lisa. (Set during 6x21)

Warnings: Oh boy, this one’s sad; get ready. Mentions of blood, torture, death, some spoilers and brief cursing.

A/N: I’ve been planning this angst for a while. Let me know how I did :)

Originally posted by spn-spam

“Coffee?” Dean offers, handing you a steaming cup. You grin; you’ve been researching this journal for hours and you need caffeine as soon as possible.

When you tap a sip, you splutter, choking on the liquid. “Dean Winchester, is there whisky in this?” He gives you a cheeky smile before shrugging playfully.

His happiness doesn’t last long before the phone rings. Dean’s face morphs into a state of horror in a matter of seconds.

As he hangs up, you look at him cautiously. “Dean?”

“Crowley took Lisa and Ben.”


“Hey”, you whisper, putting a gentle hand on Dean’s tense shoulder. His green eyes barely flicker toward yours. “We’ll get them out. Don’t worry.”

He only grunts in response, shaking out of your grip roughly. “Let’s go.”

The three of you slip into the warehouse, all splitting up. Sam gives you a cautious look, but Dean doesn’t look back. You have to admit, it stings. You and Dean hadn’t taken the final step to an actual relationship- you just stayed as really close friends. You had thought you had a chance, that is, until Sammy fell in the pit and Lisa and Ben kept him for over a year.

Regardless of the hurt you feel in you chest, you keep moving, keeping your salt gun aimed. It’s oddly quiet, that is, until you hear the sounds of multiple gunshots.

You swiftly head over to the sounds, noticing this is where Dean was passing. Stepping over the bodies of multiple demons, you head into the room. 

You arrive just in time to hear Lisa, or presumably a demon possessing Lisa, taunt Dean and Ben, holding a knife under her son’s chin.

You see Dean’s face morph into one of agony as her words sink in. You can’t take it any longer, so you aim your gun at her head.

Dean seems to hear and see you before yelling, “Y/N, don’t!”

Lisa’s head turns toward you, flicking her hand and crashing you down the stairs. Your vision blackens as soon as you hit the ground.

When you open your eyes again, you see Dean and Ben leaning over Lisa’s bleeding body. 

“Ben, grab the salt gun. I have to carry your mom.” Dean’s voice is like maple syrup- deep and thick.

Ben hesitates before meekly asking, “What about her?”

Dean pauses for what seems like hours, but was probably only a few seconds. 

“Leave her.”

At first, you can’t believe your ears. You and Dean were like glue, and have been for ages. He was the guy you know you could rely on.

You see Dean’s boots as he rushes past you. He doesn’t even look down.

With that, you vision goes black once again.


Dean sits in the hospital, gently holding Lisa’s cold hand. The doctors said she wouldn’t wake up, but he had hope.

Sam had pleaded with him to go back to help you, but he only responded with a “She’s tough. She’ll be fine. You’re not going in there alone.” Angrily, Sam had left the hospital, presumably to get coffee.

That is, until he got a phone call. He reluctantly lets go of Lisa’s hand before heading outside the room to answer the call.

“What?” He asks roughly, tone sharp and crude.

“D-Dean”, your voice shocks him a little, “I need help.” There’s a pause and choking, sounding like you’re coughing up blood.

Dean curses before looking over at Lisa. She’s safe now, he reassures himself before grabbing his coat and car keys.


When he arrives, the warehouse is silent, and the bodies are still there from yesterday. His wet boots squeak on the hard floor as he takes careful steps.

When he enters the room Lisa and Ben were in, he sees your battered body tied to a chair with your head lolled to the side. There’s blood everywhere- on your face, on your shirt, on your arms and legs.

He gently shakes your shoulder. “Hey, I got you”, he says while grabbing Ruby’s knife and slicing the ropes that held you in place. Your eyes glance up to meet his. “My hero”, you whisper, before your eyes flash black.

With your arm lifted, Dean flies to the pillar next to him, pinning him in place.

“It’s about time, Deano”, you tease, grabbing the knife that Dean had dropped.

He struggles against your strength, but to no avail. “Leave her alone”, he growls, his eyes and jaw hard.

You laugh hysterically, tracing the knife along Dean’s face. “Like you care! From what I recall, you left her here for…”, you look at your cracked watch sarcastically, “about 12 hours.”

You see Dean’s expression turn into guilt. Had it really been that long?

“Cat got your tongue? What’s the matter, Deano? Feeling sorry yet?” You mock, pouting dramatically. He stays silent, looking at the floor in shame. “You know what’s funny, Dean?” He looks up at you reluctantly. “I didn’t have to try very hard to torture her. I mean, come on, one of the only guys she’s cared about leaves her to save another girl? It’s priceless! Also, a little too easy, for my taste.”

Dean gulps thickly, tears forming in his eyes. “Gonna cry, Dean? Well get ready, because shit’s about to get real sad”, you smile raising the knife towards his throat.

Before you can land the final blow, your body stops, and your face contorts in pain as you fight to gain control of your own body.

You shakily lower your arms as Dean takes a deep breath and is released to the floor. Your body is shaking terribly, the demon already taking control again. 

You know you don’t have a lot of time. This demon is one of the strongest you’ve faced. If it takes control again, you know Dean’s blood would be on your hands forever. You know what you have to do.

You look into Dean’s beautiful eyes and whisper “I’m sorry”, before plunging the knife into your stomach.

You and the demon screech as the demon fizzles out of your body. You slump to the ground, knife leaving your hand as you struggle to breath. 

“Y/N, oh God”, Dean chokes out, crawling to your dying body. He puts his hands firmly on the wound futilely, his tears dropping in your face and shirt. “You’re going to be okay, it’s going to be okay. Stay with me. We can go to Bobby’s after you’re better and watch shitty movies all day, your favorites, come on babygirl, hold on”, he rambles, his eyes not leaving yours.

“It’s okay, Dean”, you pause as you cough up more blood. With your heart swelling for the last time, your last dying breath goes to a simple phrase.

“I love you.”

When Sam comes five minutes later, all he can see is Dean sobbing over your pale, crumpled body, simple ‘I love you too’s leaving his brother’s lips and filling the cold, dusty air.

(Want to be added or removed from any tag list? Let me know!)

Dean Tag List~ @prob8850 @skybinx-blog @torn-and-frayed @its-my-perky-nipples @trinityjadec@poemwriter98 @assbutt-jones-at-law @kalifosterxx @jensensjaredsandmishaslover @deanscherrypie @deandoesthingstome @kittenofdoomage @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog@supernatural-jackles @donnaintx @aprofoundbondwithdean @umaakomton @danamarie2123-blog @mogaruke @kickasscas67 @sandlee44@infatuatedniall @wildfirekhaleesi @fairytalesexistxx @imnotalosechester @bananakid42 @jxackles @queenindecisive @tom-is-in-my-tardis @27bmm @sisterwinchesterwriter

The Losers and their favourite books

These are all over the place - they vary up to modern, I don’t have a set time frame!! 


  •  Flowers for Algernon / Daniel Keyes

You can bet that Bill cries at this book, but like … who doesn’t? When Charlie reads over his journal entries and doesn’t understand what he understood mere days ago, Bill is sat with a quilt over his shoulders, sobbing to Stan about it whilst he strokes Bill’s hair.

  • Frankenstein / Mary Shelley

This boy loves horror novels, it is canon after all. But have you ever considered feminist writer fan Bill Denbrough? Just. Imagine that. Please. I bet he talks to anyone who listens about how Shelley revolutionised gothica as a genre, and how badass she was!!

  • Brand New World / Aldous Huxley

Oh this is just a Bill book. No one expects him to read dystopian or sci-fi features books but he just loves it? Bill and Richie are actually conspiracy theory buds until the day they die. 


  • Romeo and Juliet / William Shakespeare

Okay I know it’s a play but like … Ben loves romantic pieces, plays and tragedies so why not read a 3 in 1? He also loves proving people wrong because ‘It’s actually a really fucking awful play, but I love it for it! Flaws are needed’ like what a sweetheart.

  • Fight Club / Chuck Palahniuk

I just love the idea of Ben being like ‘First rule of loser’s club? We don’t talk about loser’s club! Second rule of loser’s club? We don’t talk about loser’s club! Third rule of loser’s club? New people must jump into the quarry at least once tonight!’ No one has the heart to stop him, bless them, and they shout it along with him.

  • The Hobbit / J.R.R Tolkien

Nerdy baby. Enough said, I think.


  • Anna and The Swallow Man / Gavriel Savit

Everyone who loves history must read this book. Seriously. Mike probably imagines Stan as The Swallow Man and cries more. Honestly. It’s just so heart wrenching and Mike is a huge softie.

  • Farenheit 451 / Ray Bradbury

LISTEN HERE. Mike would so so so be Guy Montag if this book were to ever become reality. He really enjoys books that make him think ‘What would I do?’ And this book just really makes him think, and probably mind-fucks him to be fair.

  • The Book Thief / Markus Zusak

Again. History lover. And he loves the narrative of death because how creative? And it just makes him cry so much. He loves it.


  • The Curious Incident of The Dog in the Nighttime / Mark Haddon

Hear me out: Autism spectrum!Stan Uris. This book is enough to make anyone who owns a beating heart to cry, honestly. Stan loves a good crying book and he really enjoys the storyline - he spends weeks after reading it just bursting into tears if someone listens to him talk about how Christopher deserved better and probably wrote an Email to Haddon about how he needs to know how he is now.

  • Animal Farm / George Orwell

Stan is borderline in love with Orwell. He loves all his novels, but Animal Farm just sticks out to him. He loves all the character dynamic and the metaphor throughout, and really loves it. That’s all.

  • Lolita / Vladimir Nabokov

I KNOW this book has a very serious underlying message - but Stan just really enjoys it. He cares so much about world issues and understanding reasoning behind why people do things, and that mixed with a good plot has him HOOKED.


  • Station Eleven / Emily St John Mandel

Eddie looooves dystopia!! I don’t make the rules. He loves the idea of this theatre group still travelling in post apocalypse situations because he’s probably also a huge theatre nerd.

  • Murder on The Orient Express / Agatha Christie

I dare you to tell me you can’t imagine Eddie with his reading glasses, a blanket, a cup of tea and an Agatha Christie book in his hand. Anyway he loves mystery novels and the suspense of working it out - this also leads to him smashing everyone in Cluedo.

  • The Harry Potter Series / J.K Rowling

Imagine Eddie queueing up at every midnight release and bonding over this with Rich. Go on. That’s all.


  • The Harry Potter Series / J.K Rowling

Honestly, Richie is book smart. But having ADHD means it’s very hard to read - Eddie loves this series and Richie wanted to as well and so now Eddie reads it to him whilst Richie plays with his hair. 

  • Reasons to Stay Alive / Matt Haig

Thank God for audiobooks. Richie is probably on a plane or something and listens to this and just cries because he never knew how many other people felt like him at times and JUST GIVE MY BOY A GOOD LIFE.

  • Girl, Interrupted / Susanna Kaysen

Richie! Loves! Auto! Biographies! And! Memoirs! He watches the film on release date, too, and ends up falling in love with Winona Ryder AND Jared Leto. Bisexual culture.


  • How To Be A Woman / Caitlin Moran

CAITLIN MORAN IS BEV’S HERO. The queen of feminists makes Beverly cry laughing, gripping her stomach and tears spilling down her cheeks. It’s Ben’s favourite sight and he buys her Moran’s books whenever he sees a new one in a store. 

  • Orlando / Virginia Woolf

This book has time travelling and is written by another feminist icon. That’s right up Bev’s alley, duh. 

  • The Handmaid’s Tale / Margaret Atwood

Do I need to explain? Beverly loves dystopia too, and the fact that this book is becoming relevant again makes her so angry she’s got an adrenaline rush and is half way to booking flights to Washington to fight Donald Trump.

Promises :: Park Jimin

Hello friends! This will be my new series so I hope you love it :) This series will be full on angst cause I’m a sucker for that shit man. Compared to my other writing it’s quite different! So I hope you guys like it! Instead of long ass chapters I’m going to update more frequently with shorter ones so I can put in your feed back!

Beautiful photo credit to @gowthared

Part 1, Part 2

Word count: 3.2K

Warning: ANGST, a little bit of self loathing, coarse language


I wouldn’t have thought that when he asked me to meet at our spot, where we started everything, was where we would end.

“I’m sorry,” he says with a frown, squeezing my hands in his one final time before letting go.

My eyes glaze over as I try my damn hardest to hold back the tears that dangerously threatened to bubble over. I gaze up at the cherry blossoms watching the petals whither in the suddenly cool breeze.

“Why?” I whisper dropping my gaze from the tree to look straight into his guilt filled chocolate orbs, “Did I do something wrong?”

I must’ve.

Jimin shakes his head hastily causing his fluffy dyed hair that matches perfectly with the soft hue of the cherry blossoms to bounce. He pulls his plump lips into a reassuring smile, “No, you have been perfect! It’s just that…” he sighs looking anywhere but at me.

So I wasn’t perfect.

“I’m seeing someone else.”

A dull throb resonated within my chest and the palm of my hands cramped. I cast my gaze down at my suddenly interesting boots, I nod even though I didn’t understand why and how this came to be.

He reaches out and cups my cheeks in his warm soft palms, lifting up my gaze to meet his, “I love you (Y/N), I – would never dream to hurt you intentionally. I just want you to know that I never cheated on you, you deserve better than that. That’s why I’m ending us.”

I nod again, not trusting myself to speak. I just wanted to wake up from this sick nightmare. But I knew it wasn’t a dream, it hurt too much.

“I appreciate that…” I quietly trail off, “I just have one question for you, does she make you happy?”

The bashful grin that stretches across his face was enough of an answer, “Yeah, she makes me happier than I’d ever been in a long time.”

I nod with a small smile of my own, “My happiness is with yours, Jimin. If you are happy, then so am I.”

Jimin deserves the world. And I couldn’t even provide him with happiness.

“You’re too good to me, (Y/N),” he sighs closing his eyes.

Not good enough.

He smiles, and I couldn’t help the flutter in my heart when I watch his eyes turn upwards into little crescents, “We’re still friends, right?”

I nod, “Yeah, of course.”

I tried to sound enthusiastic and show that I was truly happy for him but it was kind of hard. Seeing that my boyfriend of three years is breaking up with me for another girl. I still remember the day he asked me to be his.

“(Y/N)!” Jimin exclaims getting up from his spot on the bench.

He runs across the park, the fallen petals fluttering behind his sneakers like a trail. His soft black locks split at his forehead as he excitedly runs towards me to give me a hug.

“Guess what today is?” Jimin asks slightly out of breath.

I giggle, holding him back tightly, “It’s BTS’ one year anniversary!”

“Bingo!” He cheers pulling away.

I smile cocking my head to the side, “Then why did you ask to meet here today? Shouldn’t you be off celebrating with the boys?”

He shakes his head closing his eyes cutely, “It’s one year, from when I debuted. Remember the promise?”

“I thought you forgot.”

“I would never,” Jimin takes in a deep breath, “Will you be my girlfriend?”

Heat rushes up my neck and decorates my cheeks in a deep red, I smile bashfully nodding dumbly, “Yes. Yes!”

That was the day Jimin’s smile shined the brightest I’ve ever seen. I can still remember his face vividly as if it were just yesterday. The glassy shimmer in his warm crescent eyes and the wide grin stretching his chubby cheeks, presenting his crooked tooth in all its glory. He was on top of the moon.

I’m sorry that I couldn’t keep you happy, Jimin.

I remember the day exactly a year before that as well.

Tears were streaming down his puffy cheeks as he grasps my hands tightly in his, “I’m debuting tomorrow (Y/N).”

“Jimin…you should be happy! Don’t cry…” I smile as my tears bubble over watching him shake his head as sobs rack his body.

“I’m debuting. We can’t see each other anymore. Bang PD-nim said there’s strictly no dating until one year’s time,” he holds my gaze for a moment before breaking down again with a cry, “I don’t want to break up with you. I love you!”

I bite my lip, tasting the saltiness from my hot sticky tears, “I love you too, Jimin,” I coo pulling him into a tight warm embrace, “This is your dream Jimin. You are destined for greatness. Don’t let me hold you back.”

He shakes his head, “You don’t hold me back. You keep me together, you keep me going. I can’t – I can’t without you.”

I hold him patting his back softly.

“I promise you, (Y/N). In one year’s time, I will ask you to be mine again…” he proclaims with a nod.

I smile, wiping the tears away from his cheeks, “One year’s time,” I agree.

“I know I’m asking a lot…one year of waiting,” Jimin trails off suddenly unsure of his promise.

I shake my head reassuringly, “Some things are worth the wait. And Jimin…you are something worth waiting for – I can wait a thousand years for you. You’re my soul mate, nothing can keep us apart.”

“Nothing,” Jimin shakily chokes out through his tears.


It seems like each year on this very day Jimin likes to play with my heart. First it was bittersweet, then it was happy, and here we go again. I don’t know why it hurts more this time. Maybe because it was only me fighting for us now. Jimin gave up. Everything was bearable with him by my side.

I watch in a trance as he pats his pocket for his ringing phone. Jimin picks up and his eyes light up, something that I lost the ability to do a few months ago. He excitedly greets the person on the other end, “Hey, Soo Young!”

I quietly watch him as his face lights up before giving me an apologetic look and turning around. She makes him happy. I can live with that. His happiness is my happiness, I chant in my mind as I turn around on my heel to get back home.

If we were meant to be you will find your way back to me, I waited for a year for you. I can wait another thousand if it’s meant to be.

That’s what I told myself to keep the tears at bay, but I felt my heartstrings snap with each step I took away from him.

For some reason it took me double the time to get back to the dorms, it was probably because I was dragging my feet like a pathetic defeated person. I stop abruptly in front of the dorm’s door with a hand on the knob.

Did the others know?

I shake my head, they wouldn’t have. They would’ve told me if they knew. I close my eyes for a moment to compose myself before opening the door. And there were apologetic faces staring right at me.

“I’m sorry…” Taehyung deep baritone voice carries across the room.

I look at them all carefully, their worried faces full of pity. I didn’t want them. It was embarrassing more than anything. I swallow the hard lump in my throat and shake my head, I try my hardest to work up a smile but it must’ve looked pained as Jungkook’s frown deepened.

“You guys knew huh?”

Namjoon steps forward and opens his arms, “We’re sorry that we didn’t tell you.”

I look at his gesture but I really wasn’t in the mood. I shake my head, “I understand completely. No hard feelings! You guys are like family I completely understand,” I laugh waving my hand dismissively.

“(Y/N)…you’re family too,” Hoseok mumbles and I quickly laugh loudly, mustering up a giant smile.

“Guys, I’m fine. I’m going to my room to get some rest okay?”

“Do you want to cuddle?” Jungkook asks getting up from his spot from the couch.

I shake my head with a soft smile, “No, I’ll be just fine, thank you Kookie. I just want to be alone.”

“But noona…”

“You heard (Y/N), she wants some time alone. Let’s just give her that okay?” Jin says eyeing Jungkook carefully.

I flash Jin a small smile of gratitude before awkwardly shuffling into my shared room with Jimin. I pass by Yoongi slowly as he leans on the wall in the hallway, “Sorry,” I mumble dipping my head slightly before slipping into the comfort of my privacy.

I shut the door gently before sliding down the cold surface. I sigh squeezing my eyes shut as I felt the tears finally threatening to fall.

You’re alone now. You can let it out, (Y/N).

I gaze blankly at my hands where the simple rose gold promise ring wrapped around my fourth finger.

I promise to never hurt you, (Y/N).

Jimin would always assure me of that. Maybe he did it too often. Maybe he was saying that to reassure himself, not me. I squeeze my eyes shut, digging my fingernails into my aching palms. Only when I was finally alone, I let the tears stream down my face. I don’t need anyone to see how bothered I am over this. They are all so busy and stressed over their new comeback, the last thing they needed was to add me to their long list of worries. I was never a nuisance to them, I made myself to become their strongest support, and I can’t let them down now. Especially after BTS’ blow up from their Wings era, they need me to be there to cheer them on as they finish with their You Never Walk Alone extension.

I silently cry into my jeans as I hug my knees tightly to my chest.

I didn’t realize I fell asleep on the floor until the door opens and awoke me with a jolt. I sit up with a groan, feeling the dull ache in my joints from the hard surface.

“Ah shit sorry,” A familiar even voice rings out.

I rub my eyes and look up to see Yoongi in an old faded black hoodie and a pair of shorts. He bends down to my level and pats my head, “How are you holding up?”

I shrug, “I’m alright,” I lull my head side to side, “Just a little hurt that none of you guys told me.”

Yoongi nods in understanding, “Sorry about that (Y/N). I guess we didn’t really think he was going to actually leave you for her. You two are practically soul mates.”

I smile numbly, “Well, at least I know now. And I don’t have to beat myself up wondering what I did wrong anymore.”

He worries his lower lip between his teeth in silence. I flash him a small smile, “Since you’re here, can you help me pack up?”

“And where do you think you are going this late in the evening?” Yoongi asks with a lifted brow.

I purse my lips in thought before shrugging nonchalantly, “I don’t know. Maybe a hotel or something. I just don’t want to be here when – he comes back home.”

He nods, his bed of fluffy black hair bouncing along softly, “You know this is your home as much as it’s Jimin’s right?”

For the first time that day I genuinely smiled, “Thanks Yoongi.”

I reach out to wrap my arms tightly around his shoulders. Yoongi reciprocates the display of affection and gathers me up in his arms. He rakes his slender digits through my hair comfortingly. I found a warm comfort in his arms, but I couldn’t bask in it for long since the door flew open and connects with the back of Yoongi’s head. He hisses out in annoyance rather than pain and pulls away to send the most lethal glare I’ve ever seen.

“Hyung, what are you – oh. (Y/N), you’re still here.”

I take in Jimin’s surprised expression as he awkwardly stands at the entrance of his room. I swallow thickly as suddenly my throat started to swell, “I was just leaving.”

Yoongi abruptly stands up and takes a fistful of Jimin’s shirt, “Alright, listen here you little prick. What do you mean ‘you’re still here’ (Y/N) lives here as much as you do. You can’t just expect her to leave.”

I sigh, “Yoongi…”

“No. Hyung’s right, I should be the one leaving,” Jimin says waving his hand dismissively.

I could cut the tension in the air with a dull butter knife, “You know what,” I gain both of their attentions before I continued, “I’m going to go, okay?”

Before any one of them could argue I grabbed my purse off the ground and squeezed my way pass the two men, “Good night, boys.”


That night I managed to find a last minute hotel room. I took a long hot shower and changed into the complimentary hotel bathrobe, seeing that I didn’t have any other clothes. I lay on the soft mattress with damp hair sprawled over my pillow as I finally feel relaxed enough to check my phone.

An angry red bubble notifies me that I had an outstanding of ten unread messages but I didn’t care enough to read them, let alone reply. So I turn a blind eye on the messaging app and opened twitter. Bad idea. I should’ve known better.

Park Jimin breaks up with his girlfriend, (Y/N), of 3 years?


“Omg finally!”

Park Jimin (BTS) is dating a trainee?

“I ship, they look so much cuter together.”

“Finally oppa found someone he deserves!”

“(Y/N) was just so plain. Jimin’s new girl is so much prettier, and skinnier.”

“They were goals though. Love is dead.”

“But is anyone even surprised? I mean Jimin oppa is so perfect and that fat ass piggy was just using him for his money. I hope BTS just drops her pathetic ass completely.”


For every nice comment, there were fifteen bad ones. Without skipping a beat I deactivated Twitter and deleted the app altogether. I let out a shaky breath as tears threaten to fall for the second time today. I squeeze my eyes shut and counted to ten. I open my eyes and a single salty droplet cascades down my cheek. One after another they fell and I couldn’t do anything but stare blankly at the bright screen in my hand. With a sniffle my finger hovers over Instagram. Squeezing my eyes shut with each blink I clear my blurry vision enough to open the app. I couldn’t find it in my heart to look at the explosion of comments on my latest post of a picture I took of Jimin’s back as he stares out into the Han River. The screen grows blurrier as I fumble with clumsy hands to deactivate and delete the app. It was no way as toxic as Twitter but I just wanted to do nothing more than to curl into a little ball and be forgotten. Which is quite impossible with hundreds of comments bombarding your photo with comments that I didn’t need others to tell me. I was well aware of my own flaws, I don’t think people realize that you are always your worst critic. You don’t need someone to point out your imperfections because you already know that all too well and you beat yourself over it everyday already.

I close my eyes, only to open them as my phone vibrated in my palm. I squint at the bright screen in the dark room to see Jungkook’s name in bold white letters on display. I took a moment to contemplate if I should pick up or send him to my voicemail. But I simply couldn’t find it in my heart to ignore the younger male.

“K-Kookie?” I mentally curse at how hoarse my voice sounded.

“(Y/N) noona…I was so worried. Where are you?” The maknae whines over the line.

I sniffle, stifling a soft chuckle, “I’m doing just fine Kook. You don’t have to worry about me, okay?”

“But noona…I can’t help but to worry. Tell me where you are. I will come bring you home,” he pleads.

I sigh closing my heavy eyes, “I’m safe in a bed at a hotel. I’ll see you tomorrow okay?”

The line went silent, I thought Jungkook hanged up but his voice rang out before I could click the end button. “You will come home again, won’t you?”

“I don’t know Jungkook,” I softly mumble.

“Please don’t leave just because Jimin is an idiot. I – we, love you. We need you here,” Jungkook explains. Even though his words were nothing but sincere, I still felt wary about them. Why would they need me there? They don’t need someone like me to support them anymore, they have millions of loving fans that would follow them through hell and back and support them better than I could ever wish to. I could barely pay for my school tuition and here are fans gifting the members new phones, brand name accessories, and not to forget chunks of space matter. I literally make them shitty homemade presents, what a fucking loser, maybe the fans were right. I was just a waste of space.

I self induce a loud yawn over the receiver, “I’m sorry. Really tired, we can talk about this another time okay? Good night Jungkook.”

Without even waiting for a reply I end the call and turn off the device that seems to do nothing but remind me of all my nonexistent worth. I throw my phone at the foot of my bed without another thought and switched the bedside lamp off. Being in complete darkness besides the sliver of moonlight decorating the walls, I finally was at peace.


masterlist || coming soon//recently posted || tell me something?

Requested: Can you please do an imagine where y/n is crying bc she feels herself so bad (smth hurts or she’s giving birth) and Shawn hates it cause he can’t do anything about it?

Your name: submit What is this?


When you’re really sick, you have a tendency to cry or whimper in your sleep. You’ve been doing this for as long as you can remember. It used to freak your parents out because you’d be asleep and they couldn’t help you without waking you up, and then the same thing happened with your roommates once you started attending Uni. While it is happening, you are vaguely aware of it, but not fully because you’re actually asleep so you can’t stop it unless you wake yourself up.

“Shhhh,” You hear your boyfriends soft voice cooing in your ear as one of his arms is wrapped around your shoulder holding you securely close to his chest, while his other hand is gently pushing your hair from your tear stained cheeks and wiping the tears from your face. “Shhhh,” He tries to comfort you more as you slowly wake up and realize what is happening. “It’s okay y/n, I got you.” His voice is low and soothing. He knows you were asleep and making all these noises in your sleep, but he’s still trying to comfort you because he doesn’t know what else to do. 

Your eyes open, and it feels like your headache gets even worse if that’s even possible. You move slightly and he looks down at you to see that your eyes are open, he exhales audibly, “Oh thank God you’re awake. I don’t know how much more of that I could take” he says honestly. And you know he’s talking about the way that you were crying and whimpering in your sleep.

Keep reading



Seriously, my Birthday was just amazing thanks to all of your lovely messages and gifts you made! I’m going to make a print of this so I can look at this over and over again. *sobs*

Come over to my parteh, eyyyY!!


I got glasses that looks just like Stanford Pines’ as one of my gifts. I can now dweeb out with #style. 

REQUESTED: “could I request a fic where Credence is in the tub after a bad day & he’s just kinda curled up in the tub all sad & his s/o comes in w flowers & they talk for a bit (s/o tries to comfort him) but Credence is still kinda melancholy and s/o is like ‘fuck that/it’ takes their jacket & shoes and climbs in & giggles & kisses & possibly smut ensues~ thank you & I love this blog"

Warnings: Descriptions of a destructive mindset, but nothing too explicit.

Word Count: 1,508

A/N: This doesn’t have smut because I’ve had like zero energy lately, I’m sorry :// I hope it’s still okay!! :-)

It was easy to forget when he was surrounded by friends and loved ones that much of his life had been pretty horrible, to put it mildly, but now, sitting in the bathtub submerged in hot water, Credence couldn’t help but be overwhelmed with it, like every happy moment was just filler time until he was free to remember. Mostly, he was overwhelmed with thoughts of his Ma, so much so that he couldn’t help but fall completely victim to an onslaught of negative thoughts.

Sitting in this tub for so long, indulging in the warmth of the water and letting himself use frivolously scented soap, well, that certainly must be a sin. He could hear all those times that Mary Lou reprimanded him for standing in the shower for too long, that bodies aren’t meant for relaxing; they’re meant for doing the Lord’s good work.

Credence let himself slip further under the water, fighting tears at the memory of that seemingly forgotten voice, but then, his hair, grown long now that he didn’t have to sit in that creaking chair every Saturday as Mary Lou lopped off chunks of it to keep it from unruliness, began to swirl around his shoulders, sweeping across them and pressing to his neck and face as the strands separated and floated in the water. Credence couldn’t help but lift a hand to them, yanking with more force than he intended, fighting off the bile that rose with the rising awareness of his sin, the vanity he indulged when he looked in the mirror to style his hair and appreciate it afterward, the pride he fostered when his friends and significant other complimented it, the disorder it caused since it was not easily maintained. Perhaps his hair was his greatest sin of all.

But no, his greatest sin must be you. You, whom he loved so dearly and with all of his heart. Premarital sex, sex for pleasure, letting you touch him at all, that was sin. The pleasure he got from it, that was sin. Letting you love him when he was so wicked, that was sin. And of course, the fact that he loved you more than he ever loved the Lord that Mary Lou talked about, preached about, fought about… That was his greatest sin. The thought of what Mary Lou would do if she were here to learn of his wickedness, of the sin he had been allowed to succumb to in her absence was enough to have him shaking, crying, pulling his knees to his chest, and closing his eyes as tightly as he could. He should have known he couldn’t forget. A quick glance to his scarred hands would have made sure of it, even if it had been theoretically possible. Mary Lou had made sure her teachings were a part of him forever. Looking at him now, she would have been proud of her work.

Credence slipped further into the tub, his nose now just above the water, the bath water that was now collecting the tears that had picked up a steady stream down his face, and he couldn’t help but jolt bolt upright when he heard a knock on the bathroom door before it opened.

There you were, his greatest weakness, the reason he lived in sin. Looking at you, closing the door gently, trying to balance a bouquet of assorted flowers in one hand as you did so, an assortment you must have noticed him admiring earlier that week, and not fully facing him yet, he couldn’t help but cry harder because he wouldn’t give up the sin he lived in—he couldn’t, not when he loved you so completely. Did that mean there was no salvation for him? Did that mean he was damned? Had Mary Lou been right all that time?

When a cracked sob came from the tub, you turned as quickly as you could and took Credence in: raven black hair plastered to his neck and face, honey brown eyes made glassy with tears, face slightly swollen from crying, lips parted in a deep frown, breaths coming quickly and causing his chest to look slightly sunken with the force of them. It was a bad day.

You placed the bouquet on the counter by the sink gently before walking over to the tub and sitting gently on the lip of it, gazing down at Credence before cupping his face in your hand. You watched his eyes flutter closed as he released a shaky breath and slipped further under the water. “Do you want to talk about what’s wrong, honey?”

Credence squeezed his eyes shut tighter at the term of endearment, one that he certainly didn’t deserve. “I’m a sinner.” His voiced rasped and cracked slightly from lack of use and from emotion. “She was…right. All that time, I…”

Getting up so that you could kneel by the tub instead and be closer to him, you brought your face near to his so that you could kiss his forehead and push his wet hair from his face. “Mary Lou, if she were really doing the work she said she did, would have acknowledged that we’re all sinners in the eyes of her God, Credence.”

Those beautiful eyes opened slightly so that you could see the color in them, and a tinge of hope too. “I guess… How do you know?”

You smiled gently at him, continuing to stroke your fingers through his hair. “My mother raised me on that Bible too, Credence. It may not mean so much to me anymore, but I remember the teachings. And we’re all sinners to Him. We just have to try our best. And part of trying our best is enjoying ourselves. Loving his other creations. Appreciating the life he gave us. Your mother just left those parts out to fit her own biases.”

His eyes were completely open now, looking at you with unhindered adoration and confliction. “It doesn’t mean much to me…anymore…either. Is that bad? I can… My mother’s voice… Am I wicked?”

You inhaled deeply and scratched lightly at his scalp before answering. “No, Credence. You were taught all the wrong things for a really long time by a really mean woman, and that makes it hard to let go. And there will be bad days like this one, but… You deserve the things you have, Credence. You aren’t wicked.”

He nodded at you and let his eyes fall closed again. “Thank you, Y/N.”

You couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness as you realized he was still…low. You knew you couldn’t fix it, but you hated that he still had to go through this. You also knew you wouldn’t let him go through it alone. When you stood, his eyes opened again at the sound of your movements and widened as you kicked off your shoes and removed your jacket. “Do you mind if I join you, Credence?”

At his slow nod, you began taking off the rest of your clothes, blushing slightly at the pure love in his eyes. You still weren’t used to being loved so completely and reverently, especially by someone you loved just as much. You got in on the other end of the tub so that you could face him and wrapped your legs around his waist so that you could bring yourself closer to him, nearly in his lap. You cradled his face in your hands, stroking your thumbs just under his cheekbones and smiling when he let out a contented breath. “I love you so much, Credence…” You found yourself whispering.

His eyes opened again at that, just looking at you, taking you in. “I don’t know if I…deserve it.”

That hit you like a ton of bricks, right to the chest, and you simply shoved yourself forward in the water, not caring that water sloshed over the side of the tub, and pulling him into a hug, letting out a breathy, half-hearted laugh as your wet bodies slipped against one another.

Credence exhaled sharply too, but a sob followed as he finally moved his hands to clutch desperately at your back. “I love you, Y/N… I’m trying, but I…”

You pressed sloppy kisses to the slope of his neck and said, “Trying is all you can do, and it’s enough, Credence. I’m here on the bad days too. It’s us, remember?”

You pulled away as he nodded, resting your foreheads together and moving one hand to stroke his face again. “It’s us. Even… Even on bad days.”

You smiled broadly at the sound of his voice, more confident than it had been a moment before, despite its constant quiet, and moved back, gesturing for him to lean back against you. You stayed like that, his back pressed to your chest as you stroked patterns across his skin, long after the water had lost its warmth, and he wasn’t all better. Nothing had been fixed, but the more he relaxed against you, the clearer it became that good days would follow.


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My thoughts throughout both times I saw Newsies Live

Why does Jack get a full pillow and Crutchie only gets crappy looking blanket?

Okay but you’re like 12 why are you shaving

Chaz’s face once they say “AND DEAD” Don’t worry I’m dead too.


The nun harmonies though

I didn’t even realize jack runs all over the towers from the Delancey brothers during Carrying the banner

Medda is Queen

There was a super long camera pan around Jack and Davey when they were talking about forming a union and it was SO COOL


…He got it.

“I dunno about that- But we sure scared the begibles out of Wiesel!”

When jack hides behind Davey after “are you following me??”

Right before her interview with jack, Katherine just looked so freaking excited

Jack’s so defeated when Katherine ignores all his flirting attempts

Why did they have her say screaming instead of wailing? They kept all the other changes from the tour so why not this one?

That all depends on how you look at it. If you see Brooklyn, then they’re with us!

“My SKULL BUSTIN fist can use a day of rest.” woah okay calm down there Morris.

The over head camera shots. My heart stopped.

Jack wanted to run to help Crutchie SO BAD but he knew that he woulda been caught too and I cry so hard

Santa Fe? More like watch me cry, watch me sob

Why didn’t they just have the boys dance for 15 minutes for the intermission??


Chaz’ face when he sees Ben Cook tap dance for the first time

After convincing Katherine to tap Ben looks SO defeated. “That’s it?!”

~Pulitzers Poodles~

Letter form the refuge had me SHOOK

Watch me cry watch me sob part 2

There’s no escaping us pal. We’re inevitable.

The POOR GUYS head is spinning

My theatre didn’t have a lot of reactions to the daughter reveal so I just wanted to yell “WHAT?!” But I didn’t ://

When jack throws the cloth on the table to the beat of Brooklyn’s here.

Just Brooklyn’s here. The whole song. It’s such a clever song.

TOMMY IS SO SHORT and yet he could have Ben on his knees at his mercy in a split second if he wanted to

Ben’s face when he’s looking at Jack after the betrayal. Like it’s so full of hurt and anger and sadness and yet it’s almost expressionless.

They did such a good job with Something to Believe in ike I usually don’t enjoy that scene as much but it was so great

“We could throw a hoedown in here and no one would be the wiser!”

Jacks little “sorry” after he spits in his hand and Darcy looks like he wants to puke.

I love how they put Les right in the middle of the towers during the Once and for All Key Change.

Jack’s face when he sits down in one of the fancy chairs.

Also Jack’s face when he shakes hands with Roosevelt

“Don’t just stand there letting those kids sing. Endlessly.”

“He doesn’t do happiness, does he?”

“Heck, you can’t even get out of your own office.” …I don’t think he does go out of his own office honestly.

“I’d do it with a smile!”

Just… Roosevelt’s character all together.


What’s Santa Fe got that New York Ain’t… Tarantulas? (Pssst Jack is afraid of spiders.)


And then just curtain call was flawless as always

Also they spelled Tommy’s name wrong in the credits I demand a refund

Tied Down

Requested: Yes by the lovely @yehpyahp

can i get 61, 67 and 100 with bucky please? you’re writing is so incredible by the way and i love reading your work x

Warnings: Cursing, depression. Sexual themes.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes X Reader

Summary: Bucky doesn't believe he’s good enough for you and that thought pushes him to hurt you before you can hurt him. At least that’s what he told himself. Inside he feared the winter solider would come back and he didn't trust himself enough to stay. 

Prompt 61-  “You broke up with me! Remember?”

Prompt 67- “You can’t do this!”

Prompt 100- “I did it for your protection!”

Authors Note: Thanks for your request! Hope you like it! Also…..THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE COMPLIMENT! I’M CRYING! I am actually very proud of this one. Not edited because I’m me. 

Btw the song lyrics I used are ‘Tied Down by Jaymes Young.’ Highkey recommend his music..exspecialy dark magic.

Originally posted by caps-bucky

Bucky was a flight risk. You always knew this. You had excepted that one day you would get burned but you couldn’t deny the part of your soul that ached for him. For his touch, his laugh, his love. When he loved it was with his whole heart, his entire being. You felt secure and safe in his arms even in times of war and crisis. You felt loved and at home because Bucky was your home. 

When you first met you were instantly pulled into his waves of chaos, like an anchor you drowned. You made it your mission to bring the old Bucky out of him. The Bucky, Steve had told you about. You succeeded but not before giving him a part of your heart. 

That’s why the letter you were holding in your fragile hand hurt so much.

Dear (y/n),

I can’t do this anymore. I can not just lay in bed holding you close and forget about the monster I am. I know you tell me all the time it wasn’t me, but it was and I know one day you will wake up to realize this. That’s why I can not keep this up. I can’t allow myself to get hurt and I can’t hurt you. It’s only a matter of time before that part of me comes back and I will NOT allow you to be there when he does. I’m sorry but we are over. 

Tears flowed from your (y/e/c) like raindrops from the sky. The sobs leaving your mouth shook your body and the world seemed to crumble apart. You had always known one day you would get burned but you didn’t expect an inferno to erupt inside your heart. You hadn’t expected the flames to tear you down, but they did. 

The time didn’t stop and the world went on but, not for you, not without him. Your mind trapped you in the small room Bucky and you had once shared. The white sheets became your sanctuary and you isolated yourself from the world. 

Hours, days, weeks had passed but you didn’t move. It was unhealthy you knew and if it wasn’t for Wanda and Steve leaving small meals outside your door you didn’t really know how you would have been. 

It was now almost three weeks you had stayed within the four walls and you had planned to stay there until you heard a knock on your door. 

“Go away.”

The words left your dry throat in a small voice. The door opened despite your protest and in walked Wanda. 

“You need to get up (y/n).”

Her accented voice rang through your ears and you turned away from her, your head now facing the window looking out to see a light drizzle covering the street below you.

“Don’t ignore me. It’s been weeks this isn’t healthy. He wouldn’t have wanted this.”

Quickly turning to face her you stood.

“I don’t care what he would want! He left me, Wanda! Without even a proper goodbye.” 

You picked up the small piece of paper of your nightstand, the one that shattered you.

“He couldn’t even tell me in person! He left a bloody piece of paper.”

Wanda looked straight into your eyes and saw your broken soul. Gently she grabbed the piece of paper from your hand with and with a sigh she sat you down. 

“Let’s go out tonight. Let’s have one night free of Bucky thoughts. Alright?”

“I can’t.”

Your voice was soft and cracking at the thought of forgetting Bucky. You couldn’t imagine life without him, even the memory of him no matter how painful it was.

“You can and you will. It’s not forever (y/n). You are allowed to have fun.”

She was right and it brought your rage to the surface. How was this fair? He gets to just leave you broken and live his life. Standing you looked in the mirror and saw your reflection. Broken. For once you didn’t want to feel broken. 

“I-I don’t have anything to wear.”

Wanda smiled widely and stood.

“Don’t worry about that. I’ve got you covered.”

With a raise of your eyebrow, Wanda pulled you out of your room and into hers where Natasha stood with a wide smile. 

“It’s about time. I miss our little firecracker.”

Natasha said with an amused tone causing you to roll your eyes.

“Sit. Let us get to work.”

Wanda demanded, pushing you gently into a chair situated in the corner of the room. About an hour passes as the girls started to swarm you, makeup was being applied to your sensitive skin and your hair was being brushed out. 

“When was the last time you got ready (y/n)?”

With a light shrug, you answered.

“I took a shower this morning.”

There was a slight silence as the girls went back to work. Natasha walked to the small closet in the corner and pulled out a black dress.

“Put this on.”

Deciding not to argue you did just that and looked in the mirror. You couldn’t help but grin at what you saw. You saw the old you, the you that smiled at the stupidest things and made snarky remarks. The you everyone called firecracker because that’s what you were. Bright, loud, and colorful. All the best qualities about yourself seemed to vanish when he did and now you felt like they were coming back. 

Your (y/h/c) was down in light waves and the makeup on your face was light but highlighted all your best features. The black dress hugged your body perfectly. It was sexy but also conservative.  With a deep breath, you turned to face the girls.

“Let’s go.”

With more wide grins and eager nodded the three of you headed out to a club near the tower. It was a decent sized club not too large yet not so small you were sardines. 

The first thing you did when you entered the club was go to the bar. If anything was going to make this night tolerable, alcohol was that. The first drink you ordered was gone in mere minutes and you had another in your hand. Sitting on one of the old bar stools you looked over at Wanda and Nat on the dance floor. You couldn’t help but let a smile graze your face as you watched them.

“Care to dance?”

Turning around you saw a man with his hand outstretched to you. He was fairly good-looking, light brown hair and green eyes adorned his tan face. After a short internal debate, you took his hand. Tonight was your night to have fun, to forget. 

The man led you to the dance floor and with the alcohol kicking in you quickly pressed your back against his front and let your hips sway. His hands came and held your waist the two of you coming into a steady pace. All the thoughts in the world were leaving your mind and you were having a good time until the song changed.

These days the lovers trade their places
Dancing all around each other’s chairs
I can see the numbness on their faces
Jealousy fills up their hearts in pairs
So please could I be selfish with your body?

‘Cause I don’t think I could share you with nobody

The world came back into focus quickly and you felt your head start to spin, bile rose in your throat and you had to stop dancing to steady yourself.

Please. Not this song. 

Oh when I have you
I’m gonna brand you with my lips
And all of the world will know that you’re mine now
We’ll never lose faith
'Cause we’ll never forget this taste

My love has the power to keep you tied down

The reality of your current position became aware and you tried to pry the man’s grip off your hips. This was your and Buckys song and every pain you had felt was coming back. Guilt ran through your bones despite the fact you had nothing to be guilty for.

“P-please. I can’t.”

“Oh come on sweetheart.”

He pulled you closer to him, his lips connecting with your neck. Tears fogged your eyes and you felt dizzy.

Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Ohh ill get you tied down, tied down

Frantic now you wiggled against him, your nails digging into his hands. He quickly moved his grip off your waist and looked at the blood dripping from his hands. 

“What the hell is your problem? Bitch!”

“Hey! Do not talk to her like that!”

Wiping your head around at the new but familiar voice you saw him. His black hair hanging just below his chin, his blue eyes had a flame of rage behind them and he approached the man you had just been dancing with. His metal and flesh hand grabbed the man by his collar and lifted him slightly off the ground.

“You don’t talk to a lady like that!”

Ohh, late at night you’ll hear the screaming echo
But we all pretend we never heard the cries in the daytime
Don’t you worry my touch won’t leave you hollow
I’m never going to let you change your mind

The world was suddenly becoming too much. Wobbling out of the room you took a seat in the empty hallway, leaning against the wall. You ran a hand through your hair and tried to steady your breathing. 

Oh, when I have you
I’m gonna brand you with my lips
And all of the world will know that you’re mine now
We’ll never lose faith
'Cause we’ll never forget this taste
My love has the power to keep your tied down


Looking to your left you saw him. Perfect as always he stared at you with concern which only enraged you. 

“You can’t do this!”

“Do what?”

“You can’t just leave me and then show up out of the blue and save me. You can’t look at me like that!”

“I just wanted to check on you. Good thing I did, your taste in men has definitely gone downhill.”

He grumbled the last worlds and you saw red. How dare he? You had the right to do whatever you wanted to with whoever.

“You broke up with me! Remeber?”

“I did it for your protection! Not so you could get drunk and dance with random douchebags.”

“Did it for my protection? Please don’t fool yourself Bucky! You were scared so you ran away. Let me ask you something. If you were so afraid of having feelings and of me then why did you stay? Why did you pull me close? You messed with my head!”

Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied, ohh
Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down

“You only wanted to fix me (y/n)! That’s all I was to you a project. You didn’t care about me.”

“Is that truly what you think! You taught me how to love Bucky. You showed me how utterly amazing it feels to have someone care about you and then you just left and you taught me what its like to stay up till midnight crying my eyes out, you taught me heartbreak. If I only wanted to fix you I wouldn’t have cared!”

“(Y/n). I-”

“I love you.”

You stated firmly, emotion dripping off your tongue and into your words.

“With every piece of my shattered heart but if that isn’t enough for you then let me go. Not over some piece of paper and a half-assed note you left last minute. Look me in the eye and tell me. If I can’t have your heart then you don’t get mine. That isn’t how it works. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t love me. Let me go Bucky.”

“I can’t.”

And with that his lips were against yours, sparks radiated your body. His strong hand gripped your hips roughly and his metal hand caused chills to erupt on your skin. You moved your hands into his hair and toughed lightly causing a groan to come from him. The kiss was filled with passion and an unspoken love. 

Don’t be afraid to leave your mark
Give me the scars to remind me
Just how good you are (how good you are)
And if your faith turns into to dark
Pull me closer and know
That it’s enough to keep you tied down

You pulled him closer to you and moved your hands to the bottom of his shirt, his tongue licked your bottom lip begging for an entrance and you complied. You jumped up and wrapped your legs around his waist and he pushed you up against the wall his lips moving to your neck, a soft moan left your lips and you through your head back in ecstasy. 

Everything was drawing you in. His touch, his taste, his smell. Every fiber of your being craved him as his did for you. The world was fading away and you two were all that mattered. The lights flickered in the narrow hallway you two occupied and he pulled away softly. 

His deep blue eyes locked with yours and you saw the lust and passion that took over his irises. 

“I love you (y/n). I don’t want to be away from you any longer. I can’t. I need you, crave you. I’m so sorry. I should have never left. I. Am. So. Sorry.”

“Don’t ever leave me again James.”

“Never. I love you.”

You pushed your lips to his again and the sparks came back, filling the small space once more. In those couple of moments, your world was being pieced back together and you felt whole again.

Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Ohh, I’ll get you tied down, tied down
Tied down

Tag List:

@petah-parkah-and-potahtas  @lesfleurslily @xxladybananaxx  @hp-world-imagines @messrs-howler

BTS Drabble/Imagine: Silent Treatment

Member: Jungkook

Prompt(s): Angst/Fluff (Drabble Challenge)

  • 15) You’re breaking my heart, babe.


  • 29) You know when your phone buzzes, it means I’m trying to talk to you, right?

Requested by: anon

Summary: Y/N is overly stressed and heads home from work to seek comfort from their boyfriend. What happens when he gives them the silent treatment instead?

Originally posted by nochuie

You love your job. You really do. However, it is moments like this one that make you second guess your career choice for a moment. Your job is extremely rewarding, but no one can claim that you made this choice because of salary or low stress. The stress that you have been feeling for the past week thanks to the heavy workload, busy upcoming schedule, lack of rest, and a looming deadline for an important evaluation is what has led you to remain at work well past your normal “closing” time–which is actually later than most in the first place. It also doesn’t help that you had a bit of a mishap today with one of your coworkers that led you to appear to be incompetent but you had just forgotten something. Your phone has been on vibrate in your bag all day to help you focus as best as you could, your office door has been closed all day, you haven’t been disturbed since your last coworker left for home hours ago, and you were still running on the small lunch that you were able to grab in between meetings earlier in the day.

After hours of staring at a screen and stack of papers, trying to get your thoughts out of your head in a logical sequence has become nearly impossible. Sighing, you close your eyes and lean back in your chair. This is ridiculous. Deciding that the best remedy for your current state is an evening (or what is left of it) with your boyfriend, blankets, take-out, and a movie, you tidy up your workspace a little and then make your way out the door.

When you arrive at your front door, you find it unlocked–unusual considering that you believe Jungkook, your boyfriend, should be at his company for a couple more hours preparing for his band’s latest comeback. Cautiously opening the door, you are immediately assaulted with the sounds from the living room. You peek around the corner to find Jungkook on the couch and focused on his video game. Sighing in relief, you toe off your shoes, take off your jacket, and leave your bag by the door. After setting the take out that you picked up on the kitchen counter, you make your way to the couch to begin your planned reprieve from your stressful day. You enter the room with a soft smile and sit right next to your boyfriend, leaning into his side.

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Things about a military relationship that i hate pt a million

I hate how hard this is. I hate how I’m in bed alone and all I get are a handful of texts. I hate how I spend most nights crying over how much I miss you and I can’t tell you because it only makes things harder because you have no control over this. And god I just hate not knowing when we’ll ever truly be together. Most of our relationship has been goodbyes and texts. We’ve spent more nights apart than we ever have together. I hate going through day to day shit without you, every single day. And everything makes it worse. I miss you all the time. So much that I can feel myself breaking inside. And I’m so tired of saying and hearing that it’ll all be worth it one day because everyday I wonder if that’s true. If so many nights of sobbing is worth something we don’t know will happen. Or when it’ll happen. And god I just really hate knowing that most of our lives will be goodbyes and maybes. As each day goes by I don’t know if I’m even strong enough for this.

BTS as Fathers Would Include: Jhope

Fatherhood BTS Series

Originally posted by jeonsshi

  • putting underwears on their heads
  • him crying when his child brings back their art from school
  • “it’s just so beautiful can you believe our child invented art ????”
  • “hoseok this is the fortieth time you’ve done this we’re running out of space on our fridge”
  • having the luck of getting triplets on the first try

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Monsta X Reaction to Their S/O Not Feeling Good Enough

@k-popcollage requested: monstax, ikon and seventeen reaction when they comehome and find their gf crying cuz she feels like she’s think they deserve better than her

A/N: This is the Monsta X version! iKON is here. Hope you enjoyed! I don’t think I’ll be able to do the seventeen reaction tho, I can’t seem to come up with different responses from the ones I’ve done and still fits their personalities. But feel free to request seventeen but with a different prompt!

Prompt: It was a long day at practice. All they wanted to do was come home and cuddle with you before bed. Instead they come home and find you with your back up against the wall, head in your knees, and sobbing. They then run over to you and ask what’s wrong, to only have you mumbling about how you are not good enough for them.

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