i can only aspire to be as great

5 Kinds of Romanticized Crushes That Will Mess You Up

I think “crushing” on someone is a natural thing, and in the right place and the right time, it can lead to something great. Most of the time it’ll pass, as it’s meant to, and we can look back and laugh at the ridiculous amount of time spent mentally replaying the one failed conversation that we still twitch about in the shower. Crushes happen, and they almost never equate to a magical romance materializing out of thin air.

But the darker problem with “crushing” is that it occasionally turns a real live person into a trophy, a sort of non-independent rubber statue imprisoned on a pedestal, and if you ever finally reached it, you’d either squeeze it too hard or please it too much. In both cases, both people lose.

Relationships are hard work, and absolutely require more than the initial illusion of fleeting chemicals in our easily tricked brains. That rush of first feelings is overwhelming, but it doesn’t mean a whole lot in the grander scheme: and we could save ourselves a lot of trouble if we took up Taylor Swift to “count to ten, take it in, this is life before you know who you’re gonna be.”

Here are five types of romanticized crushes that require a heavy dose of self-awareness. I apologize in advance for the snark: I’m only so impassioned here because I’ve seen how badly it can get out of control.

1) Hate Crush (aka Freudian Defense Mechanism)

What it looks like: You like someone, but you hate that you like them, so there’s a lot of passive-aggressive, mean-spirited, hyper-critical gas-lighting aimed their way. This looks cute in movies, but is often awful and humiliating to an actual human being with, you know, their own thoughts and dreams.

Problems: This can be irreversibly destructive if you drag someone long enough through your daily catharsis. I understand the psychology behind this—we resent what we can’t have or we just hate it when we feel so vulnerable with someone—but displacing anger out of confusion when you can’t “have someone” is a really dark, desperate issue that might require real help, immediately.

2) Aspirational Crush (aka I Love The Idea of You)

What it looks like: That really good-looking teacher or singer or authority figure looks great from far away, like a Monet or the brand new ottoman on Craigslist, and this positional power is the sole force of attraction. The way he speaks! The way she leads! The way he knows how to open his jacket button when he sits down!

Problems: When you fall for a hologram and find the real person, it’s like a great movie trailer for a mediocre movie: except you can only blame yourself. Getting to know someone takes time and work, and so does making peace with their flaws. A person’s accomplishments only tell half their story. Part of love is about knowing how to live with the prickly, icky underside of a person, and to stay past inconvenience when the image is shattered.

3) Parasocial Crush (aka Pathological Celebrity Crush)

What it looks like: A celebrity crush is usually harmless and even a ton of fun. Fandoms are the closest thing to virtual high-fives; I’m part of a few and the camaraderie is second only to the military. But all this becomes downright insane when social media fandom-entitlement demands that celebrities (who have personal lives outside the fictional characters they portray) must be super-personal and respond to every tweet and do special favors, often by comments starting with, “I’ve never asked this of anyone famous before, but you owe me, because I made you.” Followed by the reliably manipulative, “You must be too big-time since you won’t talk to nobodies like me.”

Problems: The problem is everything. It’s unhealthy. Please stop it. If they reply, awesome. If they don’t, they never owed you that. If that sounds cruel, then I hope one day you can answer the millions of messages you get from strangers while constantly in fear that you’ll never satisfy a single one of them when you do. Admittedly, a parasocial crush has worked exactly once, which means no, statistically none of us are the exceptions.

4) You-Owe-Me Crush (aka The Friend-Zone)

What it looks like: “So I opened the door for her, right? And she wouldn’t give me her phone number and home address and mailbox keys and her Netflix password!”

Problems: Look, I think some standards are too high and unreasonable (and really, some of us don’t have a right for such high standards if we haven’t done much of anything in life, and we should become someone worth catching before we go “hunting”). But besides the fact that no one should have to change their standards to settle for less, the main thing is that friendship is usually better. And there’s no such thing as a friend-zone. Maybe “biding your time” is a good strategy to wait for old age to strike down your awful co-worker. But for a date? It’s mostly creepy. Being “forever single” isn’t a free pass for pity. Now imagine, if you could actually be friends with someone without the expectation of their naked body in exchange, and if you stayed friends with them even if they dated someone else. No one should ever be encased in a “In Case of Emergency, Break Glass” chamber. Romance isn’t something that can be forced by “nice-guy-ing” your way in (if you think so, you ain’t no nice guy). If romance happens, I hope it’s because it was explored with honest motives and a non-slimy transparency. And if you’re rejected: I’m truly sorry, but I hope it doesn’t turn you into a resentful, entitled, sour-grapes monster. I’ve been there, and even I hated that guy.

5) Apocalyptic Crush (aka Totally-Bad-For-You)

What it looks like: You know that he or she is bad for you. You know where this is going. Everyone has warned you. I even managed to package your future-regret into this juice bottle and you tasted it and you know how bad this will get. I know you hate this lecture for the third time and—hey, where are you going? Heed my warning across this long hallway as you walk towards your imminent destruction! I warned you with my pointing finger of danger!

Problems: I have a lot of sympathy for this, because there’s this wild rebellious streak in all of us that wants to strike out against conformity. But I guess it depends on what you mean by those words. Crushing on a person who only brings out the worst in you isn’t very rebellious. That’s actually conforming. Finding a person who loves you and respects you and gets to know you for who you are? That’s pretty wild. I’m not so much warning you as encouraging you, You can do way better. And you can.


anonymous asked:

The phandom isnt great, yall are gross. Everyone is rude and annoying and all yalls content sucks. everyone's gifs are ugly, the fanfics are disgusting and creepy, and the art is awful. Not to forget you guys have disgusting ships like phevin and tht dancest ship too thats fucking nasty. You guys have all these meet ups and constantly reblog selfies saying how cute yall are when you guys aint even cute? You guys constantly start drama, the phandom is fucking toxic and I hate all of you :)

okay wow, you need to calm the fuck down. first of all, everyone is rude??? people are usually only rude to you if you’re rude to them, and i wouldn’t be surprised because you’re so damn salty. also content makers??? the only good. the gif makers? i aspire to be as good as all the gif makers in the phandom, everyone makes theirs differently yet they’re all so beautiful. the fanfiction writers? i can’t write at all, they are so damn creative, they develop great stories that can make you emotional. umm the artists? awful? i’m sorry, but that is in fact false. the artists work hard on their drawings, everytime i see any art, it makes me sad that i stopped drawing, i wanna be as good as them. if you can insult the content makers, how about YOU show me what you got… show me your amazing gifs, write a fanfic that will make me emotional, and show me your drawings because they must be good 🤔 as for the disgusting ships, PHEVIN WAS A DAMN JOKE LET IT GO. DANCEST WAS ALSO A DAMN JOKE THAT EVEN DAN JOKED ABOUT. we make j o k e s in the phandom. annnnd the meetups, the only reason to hate is because everyone IS in fact cute :/ it’s funny that you say all these rude stuff on anon… as for the drama? umm i honestly can’t argue with you on that, but i don’t know a fandom that doesn’t have drama once in while, you’re acting like it’s not common. have a nice day (((((:

LWA Ep. 4 is the most precious gift.

Truly. Here we have a young author emotionally drained by all the nasty reviews and comments she’s been receiving for her writing…

…and her spirit is so beaten down by the flames that she just wants to quit.

Then in comes Lotte and what she says next is absolutely incredible. She doesn’t tell Annabel to “just write for herself”. She doesn’t tell Annabel to “just ignore the haters”.

This is SO important, guys.

Because by pointing out that the haters make up only a small portion of the fandom and that there are just as many people who do enjoy what Annabel publishes, Lotte is able to reassure Annabel and give her a purpose without discriminately excluding anyone from the fandom.

No fandom on this Earth is a safe haven. There will be trolls and critics one way or another. And nothing and nobody, not even the creator, can do anything to change that because people just have their own opinions.

But that doesn’t mean they’re not part of the fandom. In fact, judging by how long this series has been going and how no one has noticed that there’s been twelve succeeding authors behind “night fall” since the beginning, a number of these trolls probably flame the newer volumes because they’re likely fans of the older books…written by previous authors. Or something similar to that.

Point is, you can’t satisfy everybody and that’s fine. You don’t have to feel obligated to. What’s not okay is to forget the fans who do look forward to how you’ll continue the story, who do appreciate what you write, who do love your work. You may not be able to erase the negative feedback but that shouldn’t cast a shadow on the positive feedback that surely exist. Because if you give that much effort into something you like, chances are someone is bound to like what you’ve done.


Then Lotte ultimately reels Annabel in by sharing what they both love about “night fall”.

And it’s because Lotte loves these books so much and loves the books that the current Annabel wrote so much and therefore, knows how much Annabel loves this series so much that she can put her confidence in Annabel’s ability to make it even more interesting to read. Because Annabel has already done that for her and a lot of fans and it’d be an utter shame for her to stop now!

Only a person who’s been following a series for that long (since childhood in this case!), who passionately loves a series as much as Lotte does can convince another fan-turned-author to continue contributing more greatness to this established piece of work and thereby, keep giving the fans something to enjoy and love.

And I think that’s so wonderful. It’s so encouraging to all the aspiring creative thinkers out there so really, thanks, Trigger. You truly are awesome for sending out this message through this amazing anime.


Watched this gem for the first time in years. Realized that we definitely should have a “things single Orthodox Christians hear.” Here are some I’ve been told and others that I’m sure have been heard by some poor single soul at some point in history…

“Are there any young and single people in your parish?” *Asks a well meaning visitor, I responded by laughing (while ugly crying on the inside)*

“You know who wasn’t married?” *Insert the name of any of the THOUSANDS of unmarried saints*

“Have you prayed to Saint Xenia?”
- St. Phanourios?
- St. Xenophon?
- Sts. Joachim and Anna?

“So my nephew/niece, granddaughter/son, second cousin twice removed that lives in [insert foreign nation here] is single!”

“You should move near a seminary.”

“Quick hold this adorable baby it’ll make that orthodox man/woman swoon”

“What about that guy over there? (literally 20 years older then me), “ok how about that alter server? (points to his beautiful wife and children), “that one? (aspiring monastic), "fine him then” (he’s still in high school ya nasty). “I’ll pray for you.”

“I listened to this great podcast about singleness/marriage on Ancient Faith, I’ll send it to you.”

“Are you on the Orthodox & Single app?”

“Maybe someone will convert for you.”

*Sweet meddling old person at church sees that the only other single person didn’t receive the Eucharist at liturgy* “Psst give them some of the antidoron.” *wink wink*

“Maybe they can hear you reading/chanting.”

can i just express how incredibly happy i am for tarjei? he won two gullruten awards at the age of SEVENTEEN and now hes 18 and is so ready to start his acting career, he has so much potential and skam has really set the stage for him and his future. he has so so so much potential and i am ready to see him go far and achieve all of his goals, and hes only 18 - he can accomplish so much. i know i’ll never meet him, but i just want to say this. tarjei. im so proud of you. you’ve set up so much for yourself, and you can really go far. please, enjoy yourself, take everything easy, and you’ll get far. im so glad you exist and that you can pursue your aspirations to become an actor. i love and appreciate you so much and everything you do. happy birthday, i hope you get all the love and hugs you deserve. thank you for being to great. love, an adoring fan who appreciates you for not just what you do, but for who you are.

I am no fan of the aspiration to do original work. First of all, that creates an enormous amount of anxiety, and secondly, it is an impossible aspiration, because there’s no such thing as original work. If you show me a piece of artwork that everybody heralds as being totally original, I will bring in ten academics and critics who will look at that work and tell you from where that person drew their inspiration, who they had been reading, what painter they had seen … I’m much more interested in the chain of influence than I am in the narcissism of originality. The only way that you can create authentic work is to, with great humility and great faith and great curiosity, follow your own inquisitiveness, wherever it takes you, and trust that whatever comes out of you will feel original. That while other people may have done the same thing, you didn’t do it yet, and as soon as you do it and put your mark on it, it will, by its own right, start to feel original, as long as it has that authentic heart.
—  Elizabeth Gilbert

anjalicarsten  asked:

Heyy! I'm also an aspiring writer and I can't say how much your blog has inspired me! How long did it take you to pursue your dreams as an author?

Aww thank you so much! I’m actually still pursing them at the moment as far as my novel, but with my short stories it was actually pretty easy. Just have to submit to magazines and keep at it. But I encourage you to only apply to places that pay you, even if its a bit tougher, your work is worth it. Freedom with Writing is a great resource for magazines that are open for submissions as well as pay you. For me I got lucky–the first place I submitted accepted my work

anonymous asked:

I just wanted to stop by and let you know that not only are you an absolutely gorgeous human being but your attitude and demeanor (from what I can see through this blog) is one that we all as individuals should aspire to be. You are a ray of sunshine and I want to thank you for infecting us with your brightness through your blog! Have a great day

This is so nice and I needed to hear something like this. I try to be as positive as I can even if I’m not feeling positive. Thank you so much, anon.

anonymous asked:

Can you talk about your lovely art? What brush do you use? Program? Do you have a process or can you Show a bit how you make those precious lines?

I primarily use Clip Studio- the pens and brushes are so clean and precise, I love them. I used to use Paint Tool SAI and Photoshop, but Clip Studio is great not just for drawing really clean lines but it’s also great for painting. This piece I did earlier this year was done entirely in Clip Studio. It also has a wide array of tools for manga drawing including halftones and pattern brushes. And it’s only $50. It’s a great investment for aspiring artists. ANYWAY I’LL STOP ADVERTISING MY FAV PROGRAM.

I like to use paint brush tools for my initial sketches bc they flow nicely and the variety of width is easier to control. My initial sketches always look like blobs lol. I would post a pic of my process but I have a bad habit of deleting sketch layers after I’m done with them :/ I also have a REALLY BAD HABIT of not using any references. I really need to get better about that bc I know I could be so much better with anatomy if I actually used the 100s of refs I save into a useless folder on my desktop. I usually do 3-4 sketches before putting down the final lines. An exception would be this: 

 (that was all one layer sketch save for the phone convo lol)

I have different techniques for different types of pieces. When I draw, I always do the lines first, color, and shadows last. When I paint, it’s the reverse, shadows, color, lines lol. Clean lines are harder for me, but I really try haha. I use a 9pt-16pt pen tool for that. Actually, my anime/cartoon style is heavily inspired by one of my fav artists and good friend snickerdoots. She’s been a huge source of inspiration for me for quite a few years. Her lines are such the art goals lol. Go check out her stuff!!

Natty’s Birthday Task

Hello everyone! So as some of you know, I’ve kind of become Natty’s Big Brother, and what’s a Big Brother if he doesn’t do something for his baby brother on his birthday? So after a little discussion @natty-pup gave me the following task: Pick 10 Tumblr Doms and 9 Tumblr subs and compliment them. So here’s the list of people and what I’ve to say about each one! Love ya, baby brother, and I hope your day is as amazing as you are.

Oh and I apologize in advance if you don’t see your Tumblr URL in the list below, there are simply too many wonderful people for me to name! 

Keep reading

How To Learn Multiple Languages At Once, A Masterpost

I’ve shared posts on this topic before, but I feel I need to touch on it again with my own words, especially right now. I’ve been re-organizing my language learning schedule and strategies, since my school schedule will be calming down on the 17th, my last day of the school year until August. Currently, I’m learning French, German, Spanish and Japanese.

A lot of people, even in the polyglot community, think that learning multiple languages at once is impractical, a bad idea, impossible, or all three. This depends on who you are, your learning propensities, and your schedule. If you have a lot of work all the time, it’s not a good idea to be trying this. I was working on papers, presentations, and extracurricular activities, so I concentrated on French, because I was preparing for my final exam. This is because it was difficult for me to balance four languages and all my schoolwork, and so I prioritized. This is the key to learning multiple languages. When you’re thinking about how to organize your multiple-language learning, ask yourself these 3 questions:

How important are these languages to me (in descending order)?

How much time (per week) can I commit to studying?

Do I have decent access to resources for these languages?

The first two are fairly self-explanatory, but the last one may confuse some people. This question is important, because you don’t want to be spending a lot of time looking for resources. You should make sure you have organized your materials before hand. Know what you’re using to study, and you’ll streamline your learning!

For example, I use Anki and Memrise for my vocabulary learning for all my languages, since I can usually find a decent set of vocabulary cards. For grammar, I locate a reliable and accessible grammar site or book to read from. Always keep your sources consistent, because even if you might learn something wrong, you can easily find where you wrong. The thing is: you should also cross-reference! Make sure that multiple sites or books on grammar say the same thing about certain principles, especially the ones that confuse you. I have some three or four different resources for German, and I always cross-reference if something stumps me. For some languages, I know there aren’t that many resources. For Indian languages and many minority languages, it can somewhat to very difficult to find decent resources. The Langblr community is a great place to ask about finding decent resources! Just ask us! If we don’t know, we will still post your ask with something like “ I’m sorry I don’t know but maybe one of my followers knows?”

Wikipedia is always an OK start to reading about grammar, but I warn you that Wikipedia is not only subject to change, but also can be very academic and not suited to the purposes of the language learner. I, myself, am an aspiring academic, so it’s a little easier for me, but I highly recommend finding sites written by and for language learners, like this blog! I try to write explanations in the most down-to-earth way possible, even though I still believe in using the technical grammatical terms, like “conjugation” and “case declension”, because they’re convenient and acceptable ways to describe the way a language works.

Another key part of learning more than one language at once is what I call the “degrees of separation”. What this means are the ways you separate each language. A really basic one might be already be present: the languages are different structurally and historically. With exclusion to French and Spanish, as they are both Romantic languages, German and Japanese are all from different language families. Sure, Japanese has a whole alphabet for borrowed words, but has very little in common with French or Spanish. In contrast, English borrows some of its words from other languages. Similarly, Korean has borrowed quite a few words from Classical Chinese, but shares very little in common with Mandarin otherwise. There’s also temporal separation, where you study different languages at different times or on different days.

You can also use methodical separation, using different methods or programs to study (ex. using Memrise for French and German; Japanese and Spanish on Anki). The only other one I could think of is spatial separation, where you physically study in different places for each language. Which I plan to do once I get a routine down.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask!

My first Masterpost…cool :3

My Hero Academia/HP AU

So I decided to combine two of my favorite things: My Hero Academia and Harry Potter. I had some general ideas but I wanted to make sure I was fully understanding each character and make sure I found a house that I felt was appropriate for them. I’ll probably make art based on this soon. If you want more characters or certain details let me know I’m my ask box :)

Izuku Midoriya- He would be in Gryffindor. He would be seeker on the Quidditchteam. He would be made fun of because his mom could only afford second hand supplies. His favorite classes would be history of magic, where he can learn about the many great wizards and witches he aspires to be like, and defense against the dark arts. His patronus would be a Bear and he would have a True Owl.

Katsuki Bakugou- Slytherin. Like he’s literally their mascot lol He would definitely be a pure blood as well. He would also play as a the Seeker of the Slytherin Quidditch team. He would excel in all of his classes and also aims to be a great wizard. He picks on Izuku for trying to be a better wizard than him and is constantly trying to show him up. His patronus would be a tiger and he would have a grey short haired cat.

Shoto Todoroki- I was going to say Ravenclaw, but if you really think about why he wants to be a hero he’s really more of a Slytherin. He would also be a pure blood. He would play Quidditch as well but he would be one of the Chasers. He would do very well in all of his classes, but he would be especially into his spells class. His patronus would be an Arctic wolf and he would have a snow owl.

Ochako Uraraka- She would be in Gryffindor. I’m also going to say that she’s a mud-blood and is hoping that becoming a good witch that she’ll be able to help her muggle parents with their muggle job. She really only has interests in her astrology classes and is always asking for help with her work. She would play Quidditch as a beater and loves the rough parts of the sport. She is extremely good at the Wingardium Leviosa spell. Her patronus would be a rabbit and her she would have a short hair calico cat with a stubby tail.

Iida Tenya- I have to say he would be a Hufflepuff Prefect. He would be a half-blood and wants to be a good wizard and work for the Ministry of Magic just like his brother. He would be the seeker of his Quidditch team on account of how fast he can move on his broom. His favorite class would be History of Magic. His patronus would be a German Shepard and he would have a barn Owl.

Tsuyu Asui- So I definitely think She would be a Ravenclaw. She would also be a pure blood. She would take special interests in herbology and take part in after class clubs. Her patronous would be a tree frog and she would have a toad.

anonymous asked:

pst hi friend i love all your art really a lot and i was wondering if you had any art tips for someone trying to get better? thank u

Hi friend! Thanks a lot, I’m glad you like my art. And I do! This is gonna be super long… but here are 10 tips that have helped me and still help me and hopefully it will help you too!!

1. Draw as much as you can - better yet, draw one or multiple things a day! It doesn’t even have to be anything finished, even something like an eye or a hand is a good start, but try to aim to do maybe a page of doodles a day. You can even pick a theme and then go from there.

2. Get someone to critique your art – I think this is one of the most important things!! Sometimes we don’t really notice our own mistakes (maybe we’re looking at it for so long or you just don’t know how to approach a certain part of it), but other people will be able to see it. Get someone who is honest and will tell you what’s wrong with your drawing and what to improve on.

3. Set up a reference folder - Drawing from your head is really great and all, but you need to learn the basics of anatomy before you can learn how to distort and shape your style in your own way.

4. Don’t hide things – People tend to hide things they’re not good at like hands behind the back, feet covered with clothes or even covering one side of the face (something I’m guilty of doing for sure…) Every time you do that you deprive yourself of getting better at that specific thing because if you’re not drawing it you’ll never get better at it. Even if you draw it out and it looks bad, it’s better than not drawing it at all.

5. Draw things you’re not good at – if you know you need to improve on something, lips for example, then buy a sketchbook and literally fill it with lips. In fact, get multiple sketchbooks and fill it with things you’re not good at and then you’ll start to see yourself getting better, page by page.

6. Try different things – Experiment with styles, colour, mediums, whatever! The best part about drawing is that you can do so many things with it and I find that using other mediums really help improve my drawing skill. 

7. Make an inspiration tumblr/folder/wall – I find looking at art I really love really motivates me to get better and it helps me learn new techniques. It gives you something to aspire to, plus pretty art always looks great on your wall!

8. Draw from life - This sounds boring, I know, and it’s definitely something I don’t particularly enjoy but I find that it’s extremely helpful. Not only does it help you get better at drawing anatomy, people, object etc, etc, but it helps you learn how to observe. Learning to observe is crucial, but don’t just look at things, STUDY them. Watch people interact, shift your arms in different angles, move your light source around and make mental notes in your head. Become a camera and use your hands to record your images.

9. Look at Tutorials – No shame in learning new things! Sometimes I watch a video or walkthrough by one of my fav artists and I learn easier ways to do things that would have otherwise taken me an hour or two to do. You can learn some really cool tips and tricks that you would have never thought of yourself.

10. Don’t worry so much – Progress might be slow, maybe other artists improve faster than you and that’s okay!! Try not to get frustrated because there are artists that are “better than you”. Art is really subjective and people enjoy different styles so it really doesn’t matter how “good” or “bad” you are. If you enjoy what you draw then other people will too.  


This is a really great piece on how sisters can/should aspire to wear hijab. I know the way he uses the word “tease” probably rubs people the wrong way, but I think what he is trying to say is that some sisters fashion their hijab in ways to draw attention and make themselves more attractive therefore defeating the purpose of hijab. But please don’t let that take away from the heart of the message. After all, he is only sharing his Islamic opinion “on the spot” (and he’s Islamically correct) so his choice of words may not perfect but he’s so kind and caring, masha’Allah. (Told you I love Sheikh Omar Suleiman. If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t have practiced as long as I did so I’m going back through my favorites to boost my imaan.)

Understanding the Spiritual side of Mushrooms

Hello hello! Love your page, makes me feel good reading about people experiencing their own unique awakenings.
I messaged you to ask if you could check out a post on my page about a spritual mushroom experience I had not to long ago. I would like to hear someone elses take on it in orde4 to analyze it from someone elses point of view.
Thanks for reading and have a great day. :)

Story here: http://ishouldhavebeenawolf.tumblr.com/post/144485970627/trip-report

Wow Thank you! Always a pleasure to hear <3

Um this was a lot to soak in, what’s interesting is mushrooms always has that particular effect of being highly analytical. I actually asked my wonderful husband to be about this because he’s more advanced when it comes to mushroom experiences and the neurology of them. He’s my grounding rock, you can see how we balance eachother out lol.

Take it from him: Psilocibyn creates a very associative experience where everything that you experienced within your life starts associating with your current experience, it blurs the boundaries of different parts of your brain and as a consequence you start experiencing an intersection of different thought patterns. Therefore you’re able to make new connections between different memories and your association with reality. The distinction between those regions become less defined and allow memories to intersect with one another. They basically intersect with one another while forming a highly subjective and associative experience. 

psilocibyn, the active compound in mushrooms, releases a flood of neurotransmitters in the limbic system, particularly the hippocampus, the thalamus and the anterior cingulate gyrus. the hippocampus is the part of the brain that controls memory, the cingulate cortex coordinates the signals between the hippocampus and the prefrontal cortex. it causes the brain to recall a wide variety of memories, and emotions all at once. what we experience in a psychedelic state of mind is highly personal to the individual and represents the sum total of an individuals personality and experiences up to that point. By removing the distinctions between regions of the brain, one is able to review these aspects of oneself in a symbolic and analytical manner, allowing the individual to control the emotional response one has to these individual and personal phenomena. in summary it allows you to see who you are, and how you feel about the world around you, therefore its up to you to decide how you will chose to act on the information you have about your identity 

a psychedelic trip is a lot like a waking dream. we see symbols and interpretations of the world that reflect our current world view. i cant interpret what the symbols your subconscious chose to present to you should mean. the whole point of a trip is to find out the contents of your mind and establish what personal meaning exists for you to discover. every experience is unique to the observer. this is your opportunity to decide who you are, and who you want to become, no one else can tell you that, just as no one can tell you what your hopes and aspirations are, or what you love and why. these things are defined by your response to specific phenomenological events that can only be experienced once, and that is what defines your identity. your trip is also unique, and it is a defining experience that has allowed you to shape your identity.

 this is the kind of thing for which you need to take a great deal of time for tremendous consideration. its nothing to be taken lightly. i still consider the meaning of my very first trips, as much as my most recent, and i am still discovering meaning in each of them, they have defined me in an extremely subjective and subtle manner. there is a great of dialectical tension in these experiences. the more you look for an objective truth, the more you will find subjectivity, and consequently, the more you seek subjectivity, the more objectively you will see the world around you, and the closer you will be to truth

its all very ambiguous and postmodern in nature, and its something you just have to make yourself comfortable with. our nature is to strive for certainty, but we must accept the fact that there are many things we can never know completely and that includes ourselves. we are compelled by these extremely atavistic and primal urges which are controlled by the limbic brain, every aspect of who we are as a species is defined by these urges. the two most compelling drives of any species are the drive to continue the species and the will to live, which in the common vernacular are drives of love and fear. the tension between these two drives are source of the most profound cognitive dissonance. 

we seek to know what is beyond our immediate perception, what exists over the horizon so that we may have certainty in our lives, yet we seek danger because our subconscious mind knows that there is a balance between risk and reward, and when we go to danger we are not only the most alive we will ever be, but also that we will have opportunity to control that which compels us. it is fundamental phenomenological paradox. we are are all individuals, and we are compelled by the same drives, yet we are all different, and outfitted with different capabilities, we seek to know the world around us and control our environment, but we are beholden to the forces of chaos and uncertainty.

The universe is deterministic, established on a series of parameters of specific initial conditions, and continuous in nature, and yet it is absolutely unpredictable. we are evolved to be individual, and yet to function as a group. that is the nature of society and the world we live in and yet it tells us nothing about what it is to be human, it tells us nothing of the joy of triumph, or the crushing blow of loss. 

Psychedelics help us glimpse these things, but its up to us to make the connections. they cannot give you something you do not already have. i do however view it as a rite of passage, and initiation into the mysteries of life. to me my experiences have been sacred, and helped reveal these deep truths. 


FitzSimmons Fandom Appreciation Post (#2)

Soo, I’ve been noticing an odd amount of hate being spread in this fandom and I?? Don’t??? Like?? It?? At?? ALL?? Because everyone here is an actual gift and super important!! I made one of these when I was very new to the fandom but I was only scratching the surface of awesome people and the things they do, so I’m back with an updated version because sometimes you just need a reminder that you’re awesome and great and beautiful and this fandom wouldn’t be the same without you. Anyways, *cracks knuckles* let’s spread some positivity!

First off, thanks to @thefitzsimmonsnetwork , @teambiochem , @leofitznetwork , @jemmasimmonsdefensesquad @teamengineering  for bringing the community together.

Thanks to @inevitablyfitzsimmons for being an actual BABE. Like honestly, you’re so sweet and kind and pure and what did we do to deserve you in our fandom.

Tip your hats to @superirishbreakfasttea a boss lawyer, great fic writer, and overall sweet person who handles hate better than any one I’ve ever seen.

@agl03 AKA the mama hen of this ship. Thanks for calming us down when the rumors start to fly and thanks for answering meta’s and spending your free time writing fics for me us.

@grapehyasynth Honestly, what can I say. THE FLUFF QUEEN. Thanks for dedicating so much time to writing drabbles and answering asks and I still remember when you were very new to the fandom and you asked if I could write you a thing because you didn’t have time. oh, how the tables have turned (I’ll write that thing for you one day, I didn’t forget about it!)

Thanks to @agents-of-frickle-frackle  @leotitz @agentsofpsych for the crack posts that are the actual best.

@dilkirani My favorite fanfiction writer, I can only aspire to write the way you do.

@shieldsil @theskyefalls and @eclecticmuses for the fantastic art. These people were #blessed with the art abilities I could only wish for. Honestly amazing and will always be seen as more than just “doodles”. ;)

Thanks to @blake-wyatt who just has thee BEST tags in history, like I don’t know what I would do without them.

@ughfitz who’s just super sweet, I can’t even.

@agentsoflove thank you for spreading positivity.

@wakandandperthshire @bioforensics @fitzsimmonsinthetardis Just overall great people that I don’t know much about but I know they are great and loved and awesome and yeah.

@mynameiseco @blacklolitarose @stelenaisinfinite for the UH-MAZE-ING fan videos. They are so beautiful and amazing and deserve more recognition and I watch them multiple times a day because they are just sooo good. 

@cardb0rdeaux your edits are simply divine! You’re so talented, stay awesome!

Tip your hats to @fitzsimmonsfic​ for “doing the lord’s work” and finding us fan fiction. 

Major thanks to @jemmamaximoff @agentcalliope @nerdlove4thewin @memorizingthedigitsofpi @agentverbivore @comickid99 @chinese-bakery @everyl1ttleth1ng @perthshirekisses *deep breath* @thelatenightstoryteller @recoveringrabbit @agent-85 @agentlukaofshield @writeonthrough  @plentyofmalk @theclaravoyant @notabadday @consoledacup @amanda-rex @jessiecrimefighter and so so sooooooo many more it’s kinda overwhelming and I feel really bad I couldn’t recognize everyone but the list just keeps going. Fan fiction writers, in my opinion, deserve thee BIGGEST thanks. From all the AU’s to period fics, The crack to the heavy angst, this fandom would not be the same if it wasn’t for fanfic writers. So take a bow, pat yourself on the back, and remember that you are the base of this operation and life wouldn’t be the same if we couldn’t laugh and cry at your amazing writing.

A thanks to just overall awesome people that deserve to be recognized like  @jemmasimmuns @jemmasimmonsy @welldonefitz @idecaesteckers @mrsdecaestecker @jemmaleopoldfitzsimmons @fitzsimmonns @mech-bull @msdevindanielle @ohifonlyx33 @unbreakablejemmasimmons@omgfitzsimmons @fitzsimmonsies @fitzsimmonss @fitzsimmmonsy @fitzsimmonsftw @pesto-aioli @simplyshipping @leggy–peggy @sciencebiaatch @sciencebabies44 @onewordtest @leopoldfitzsimmons @leosimmons a wonderful collection of people that do things from gifs to edits to videos to fan fiction to just being kind, y’all rock!

I really truly, apologize if I forgot anyone but just know if you’re reading this, regardless if your name is one this list or not, you are important and fantastic. Never stop being you and remember, despite any hate you may receive, there are people that care about you and appreciate your existence . Feel free to tag anyone I missed, stay awesome, spread positivity, and it’s a pleasure shipping with y’all.

oldwordcubed  asked:

Suggestion topic: please write an advice post advising how to write good writing advice.

ok buddy I’ll take this seriously

Because it’s kind of serious? How many times have we seen something kind of “eh…” that we wanted to give advice about or suggest improvements but been like “but who am I to say anything?”

Except that’s exactly what many people want or need; getting “yay good keep going” reviews is all right and all but they don’t “prove” you read the story. Specific, detailed, targeted comments or references to the story and suggestions are not only helpful but give the writer not only that you read and comprehended what was going on but that you also liked it and have an opinion about it. Except, if what we have to say is advice or suggestions, then we fear sounding like we didn’t like the story or only see things “wrong” with it.

And in the general sense, we can fear sounding like too much the expert, being too restrictive, being too snobby, or otherwise just not feeling like we have the authority to share our perspective.

These are all feelings I’ve had at different points at my life, and I kind of got over them with help of wonderful and great friends— of ALL skill and relational levels. Peers, people who’ve looked up to me, and people I in turn have looked up to and aspired to be like.

But to maybe set a little groundwork down, here are some thoughts to get one started, if they struggle with giving good advice or giving good feedback.

Feedback Level:

  • Look at other’s feedback or if the author has responded in any way. This may not be easy to discern at all venues. But if it’s clear that the person is not writing this to get advice, or probably doesn’t want to hear your opinion (especially if you have to break it to them that you didn’t enjoy an element of the story or that it’s problematic or something made you uncomfortable or just otherwise probably needs fixing) then don’t bother. People might not want to hear from you for a variety of reasons— sometimes they’re doing this as a mental health thing, sometimes they’re just inexperienced with criticism and think it’s a personal attack or reflects on their quality of character, sometimes they’ve made a story as part of an exchange with their friends. But without evidence that you’d be received poorly, don’t assume it will be. Even if you feel anxious, you have never made a “mistake” by stating your interpretation or feelings. Not even if it was received poorly. You are not a bad person. They are not a bad person. We’re all just trying to get better, together.
  • Refer to specific things in the story or specific areas that you have advice on. Sometimes vagueness is impossible to avoid, but try to be precise. Things like “It’s too fast” or “I don’t like the voice/tone/???” or “Maybe you should add more X” don’t help the writer. Explain why you feel this way about specific elements that you can even cite if you have to. Be clear. I know this feels like Language Composition class, I’m sorry— but that’s just how it is; hearing specific feedback not only proves your readers read and understood the story but also is a tangible piece of advice they can compare with what they wrote.
  • Don’t be gentle or try to soften your advice for the sake of a writer’s comfort. Posting things online with the option of feedback or criticism is an agreement with readers that the writer consents to feedback. People who don’t understand this (the “secret clubhouse” effect, often seen when men get angry that women have things to say about their fanspace, for example!) are shooting themselves in the foot complaining about posting to an internet venue they consensually used; there are spaces where feedback is limited or restricted, and they can use those if they like. Your words are an important part of the writing process. You’re allowed to say your peace. Of course, I’m trusting you all not to behave like douchebags when I say this; your serious and honest criticism is what the author has agreed to hear by posting publicly, not actual harassment and bullying. No, “this story isn’t very good” or other negative feedback don’t count as harassment, either. You probably have your own moral guidance, I leave it up to your good judgement to know exactly what bullying and harassment is, and if you don’t know these things, you may be sort of dangerous or unpleasant to be around in the first place.
  • At the same time, be accurate in your advice. Don’t construe your interpretation or feelings as reality. Don’t say “this is” when you mean “I feel this is,” or “The way I read it, this seems.” Don’t do the opposite, either, using “I feel” or “maybe this is” when you’re talking about a serious reality or a factual event, or real detail of the story. If something is sexist in the story, you don’t feel it’ sexist. If you identify a problem, it’s a problem, not a perceived problem— this is when you give SPECIFIC examples and SPECIFIC advice about why it’s a problem and how to fix it.

General level:

  • Identify a real trend and comment on it— similar to being specific in an individual story above. Make sure you’re talking about something that’s real and occurs in more than one place. 
  • Be thoughtful. It’s not often enough to just be annoyed or to say “Don’t do this.“ Think about why it bugs you and think about why maybe your advice is important to others.
  • Come up with a thesis (a simple summary of what you’re talking about) and a reason why it’s important. Try to include these things first. People often identify these trends, but not everybody may really think too hard about why they may be. This isn’t a bad thing. Everybody analyzes things in different ways.
  • REMEMBER LEVELS OF ANALYSIS. Not every piece of advice is relevant to every level of analysis. There’s the personal level (one story), the community level (a fan community or circle of friends and writers connected by interest or topic), the single-venue level or single-section level (JUST on one archive or venue in particular, JUST FF.Net, JUST AO3, etc.), the fandom level (just one fan following), a multifandom level or a genre level (all fanfic, or all fanfic of one genre), and greater fan media level (all fan works everywhere) to consider. These levels might intersect (All the fanfic for one fandom, but only on one venue like Tumblr). They may also intersect with levels of analysis of other topics, or greater levels of media and social analysis (the level of literature in general, the level of culture, the level of society and its expectations for said literature, etc.) Basically, think about where your advice belongs and who would find it useful and for what, before writing it.
  • Try suggesting, not prescribing. There’s no way you can provide sure band-aids to help someone else fix something or write better work. Your perspective or solutions might not be the answer. But they’re what you can give— so being helpful rather than demanding is key. If you can’t help somebody, that’s okay. They’ll come to the answer eventually, even if they don’t know what questions to ask, if they look.
  • Remember that advice is about empowering others, providing new perspectives, and stimulating the thought of others. Never to think for someone else, or to take away their power or feelings of being powerful.
  • Talk about things you’ve seen, rather than assuming things about what you haven’t seen. If you’ve seen a lot of selfish people, describe them and describe what bothered you about your fanwork. Please don’t come up with a list of symptoms and say a person would be selfish for invoking them. Otherwise known as the “litmus test problem”, the urge to say that something is just the sum of its parts and predicting what that sum will be, it’s not helpful advice and it’s why a lot of “Is my character/story/writing bad?” tests fail. Report your experiences and the things you’ve seen, don’t project the future. WHILE YOU CAN make educated guesses at the experience or the feelings of the writer in some instances by paying attention to what they focus on, their authorial motivation or message, or what traits they emphasize… it’s too difficult use those “clues” to give general advice, you can only use them for context when interpreting a specific story (back to that levels of analysis thing.)

These are just some general tips. As you come to recognize yourself as not just a creator but a responder and a mentor (and this is not hubris; you WILL be one eventually even if it’s later when you’re older and more experienced. This is inevitable, SOMEONE will look up to you just as you may look up to someone else!) to others in your community you’ll find that being a good one is something that takes just as much thought as writing or making fanwork itself. And just like those things, you’ll find your style here, too.

girlfriend88  asked:

i have been in school for nursing for three years. i have finally admitted to myself that nursing is not for me. i am passionate about art history and english and have decided to finally give up nursing pursue a career in these areas. what would be your best advice for someone like me? i am always told there you can't find suitable jobs and i am just afraid that it might not "take me anywhere"

I think that you’re making an incredibly brave choice. It isn’t easy to walk away from something (like a nursing degree) after you have invested so much time, energy, and money into it. 

You mention wanting to pursue a career in Art History and/or English – does this mean you will be switching majors to work toward a dual degree? For career purposes, I would recommend getting a degree in either or both Art History and English (if you aren’t already), but that may not be a feasible option for you. I don’t know much about opportunities for English majors (maybe this website will help give you some ideas), but I do know that there are many career options available for art history majors that don’t just fall into the traditional categories of teaching and museum work (e.g., see here and here). Take a look at those websites and see if anything jumps out at you. Are there any similar career options listed between the English and art history sites? If you found something that looks interesting, what would you need to reach that career goal – grad school? If so, in which major? What kind of prior experience may be expected of you, and can that be obtained while you’re pursuing education in art history and/or English (i.e., internships)? One thing you might want to do is look up actual job descriptions for the types of jobs listed on the aforementioned websites and see what the “real-world” requirements are. This will give you a good idea of what to work toward and how long it will take you to get to a hirable point (e.g., if you need 2 years experience in X type of work before obtaining your desired job, it will take at least 2 years…) The great thing about being interested in English and art history for a career is that you will have lots of options to chose from. You might even want to pick a “Top 3” for careers in each category and narrow from there which ones would be the most viable for you.

You’re right that finding a job in art history isn’t easy. (I can’t speak to English, but I imagine the situation is similar.) Art history is an extremely competitive field; you have to be competitive, and in order to be competitive, you have to have a fairly good idea of what it is you want, what your end goal is, so that you can take steps toward making yourself the best candidate for whatever your dream job is. One thing to consider in making yourself competitive is money: if you do think you need a graduate degree to pursue the type of career you want, then make sure you apply to programs that offer some sort of funding to lessen the financial burden. Art history is not a lucrative field – at least not right out the door. That’s one reason why it’s important to have a clear picture of your career aspirations in mind; hopefully, knowing (even generally) what direction you want to go professionally will keep you from falling into educational & financial limbo.

I don’t mean at all to discourage you; only to provide you with honest information so you can carefully assess your options.  Again, I think you’re making a brave choice, and I think that any risk present will be worth it because you’re following your passions.

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. - Steve Jobs

You will be & feel rewarded for following your passions. Maybe not right away, but it will happen.

if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen. - Conan O’Brien

I wish you all the best, and please keep me posted on your adventures!

I hope this helps!


Related Asks:

anonymous asked:

hi! what watercolor sketchbook do you use?

For my 2015 sketchbook, I was using a Quill sketchbook, and for 2016, I invested in a little sumf sum extra (treated myself!); a Moleskine, watecolor sketchbook! 

A few people have asked me this question with the assumption that I’ve been using a high-grade art quality watercolor sketchbook. To clarify; I don’t think Quill is a premium brand (I think it’s one of those generic brands), nor is it a brand specific for artists. I don’t think the sketchbook is even a watercolor sketchbook, let alone suitable for painting (I think 110 gsm?). It’s one of those sketchbooks you can pick up from your local stationery store, or in my case, Officeworks for about $5. It’s cheap, it’s paper, and it’s a notebook – it got the job done. I bought and used this sketchbook only because at the time, all I needed was a sketchbook to draw in, I didn’t even factor in paper quality.

I say this because I want aspiring artists to know out there that it’s not necessarily about how expensive, what brand or how great the quality of your tools are. Sure, having expensive paper and expensive, high quality paints means you’d get physically longer-lasting, pieces of work, for example. BUT, it doesn’t mean that you will instantly become a better artist. 

It’s not about what you use, it’s about how you use it.

If you are a beginning artist, don’t be phased and drawn by the idea that you NEED high quality, expensive materials. You don’t HAVE to have ‘high water-retention paper’ to learn how to paint. I didn’t, nor did I have any clue what that even was. It was only after I really became comfortable with watercolor that I even began to look into getting quality paper and branded paints. All you really need is a pencil/brush/paint, and paper. Practice your fundamentals, practice practice and learn. Focus on learning and getting to know your medium, not getting to know which brand is better.

Ireland, 2012

I am a young photographer from Montreal, Qc. I’ve been taking pictures for four years now and my passion has only gotten stronger. Capturing moments is one thing, but my goal is to capture images that don’t need to be placed in time, images that are intemporal. I’ve been inspired by the work of Chris Friel with his long-exposure photography and only aspire to one day produce something that can emotionally impact people half as much as he impacted me. 

But these days, I mostly cover the music scene of my great city, combining my passions for photography and music.