i blame someone else for this

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damaged like us moments + friendships/family | maximoff hale and charlie keating cobalt

“Are you really sitting there and blaming me for your own lack of empathy?” I say, dumbfounded.
“I’m making an observation,” he says. “And second, I do care. It’s why I’m here. You just can’t fathom a scenario where someone else cares more about this family than you.” He rolls forward to the edge of the table. “The world believes you have no ego, but you’ve done a bang-up job of choking it down. I’m not even sure you know it’s in there.” He waves a finger towards my body, my stomach. “Slowly but surely engorging.”

Going to “The Vault” under the school, then…

Man. This got real in record time. They’ve all told Pyrrha who they really are. Teachers… with a part time job of saving the world.

I don’t blame Pyrrha for being so nervous here. This is all coming so fast. They didn’t even give her the time to think about the offer, man. They haven’t told her what inheriting Fall’s powers even means, and what will happen to her, and what her responsibilities will be…

Her life is about to change forever and they aren’t exactly easing her into this.

As they walk, Glynda is answering questions. Seasons change, and so do the people who wield their power. When a Maiden dies, their power is transferred to someone else… Ensuring that no one holds onto the power forever.

Qrow interjected to say that the Maiden souls choose the new owner of the power “through a series of stupid and convoluted rules.” Something tells me he may be a bit salty that he wasn’t chosen to be a Maiden… Err… If men can even be Maidens.

I always thought it was the kiss that broke my heart;
Him whispering my sweet nothings in someone else’s ear,
His lips tasting anyone’s but mine.
But I realize now it was that
He told me we would be together forever
And then we weren’t.


To this day I don’t know if that’s
the universe’s fault or ours,
But for a long time I blamed him,
And now I blame myself.
No matter the guilty party,
He isn’t with me
And I haven’t forgiven any of us.

—  Alyson Kemp, “Guilty”
Never blame your fans

I know many of you artists - whether you draw, write, or compose - are frustrated that your original work, especially your dream projects, aren’t getting the responses you were hoping for.

I feel the same way.

But some of you express your frustrations completely destructively and blame the world for not giving you the spotlight.

When you do that, you’re blaming your problems for existing rather than adjusting and compromising to solve them. You’re making excuses for your mistakes. You’re demanding the world to change but you are not willing to change with it.

This is the perfect mindset to NEVER succeed in anything, ever.

You need to accept some basic truths of art before you can go any further:

  • Your art should teach you as much as or more than it teaches others: If you claim your art opens horizons and widens minds, yours should be the first priority. You cannot speak without listening. You are not a righteous prophet enlightening the heathens with the true word. You are one humble person and your art is one humble person’s story.
  • There are no new stories, but there are always new storytellers. That amazing idea you have that nobody’s ever thought of before? Someone has. But nobody has told the story your way, or drawn the character your way, or sung the song your way. Art is not about being new. It is about being you.
  • Popular art is all about the beholder. All these shows and games with so much fan art? They got to that level because they command a personal investment from and serve the viewer - they have worlds their fans want to be part of, and your canon will be swept aside along the way. You the artist are not a god or a wise sage. You are a guide and a footman. To be an artist is to be humanity’s servant, not its lord - and there’s no shame in that.
  • Most of your fans are not artists or art critics. While there will be a good number of them in your fanbase, the vast majority are not going to be super-open-minded creative thinkers who value every single opinion, outlook, and story just because it’s done technically well. They will be ordinary people with ordinary, selfish interests, and they will care about your content more than your talent. You have to balance what you want to draw with what everyone wants to see.

But the most important part of being an artist or really a person at all is to understand this:

Nobody owes you success.

Nobody is under any obligation to pay anything you produce a second glance or support or promote it in any way.

Nobody is spiting or robbing you by not giving you a like or a reblog or a follow.

Every single gesture of appreciation you receive from someone is a courtesy - a gift that you earn, not a right you’re entitled to.

It is not the job of your audience to love your work. It is your job to make it lovable. And just because you are working really hard does not mean you are working in the right direction.

I know that thousands upon thousands of artists put hours or months or years into a project and feel like they get nothing in return. Sometimes it is not how hard you’re working but what you’re working for that is the problem. 

Sometimes you need to slow down and think, “Do I have to have this just so? What would the kind of person interested in my work be looking for, and where can I address it? Am I maybe taking myself and my work a little too seriously?” 

And a lot of artists don’t realize that as an amateur, you are the sole proprietor - you are your art. Whether people like you determines whether they like your art.

And that’s why when you blame everybody else and post ungrateful, catty garbage like this:

… you don’t subsequently become the next Toby Fox.

The simple fact is that people will pay you attention if they think your offering + your hassle are worth their attention.

You need to create a world that someone other than you will have fun in and you need to be a good host to everyone who visits

You need a world that will welcome your fans with open arms.

You need to build a world people can live & play in.

And you and your world need to appreciate your fans just for showing up.

Because this is exactly what the big fish do.


because they spread your work around to more people without shanking you on credit and who gets the likes


because they make your work show up sooner & more often on searches and are simply a nice gesture


because they take time out and pay good money to listen to your story and make you from a pauper into a prince


because if you appreciate no one, no one will appreciate you, nor should they

I’ve seen a few people saying that they don’t want to see Black Panther because Marvel are erasing Ayo’s sexuality and like, as a lesbian, I get why people are saying that and I get that lesbian erasure is really frustrating and if it were literally any other marvel movie I’d agree but like.. this movie is about poc, specifically black people. If people don’t buy tickets Marvel are not gonna chalk it up to them erasing a lesbian’s sexuality, they’re gonna blame it on the fact that the cast is predominantly black which could mean less chance of a sequel, or for any more superheros of colour in the future. I understand wanting to send a message to Marvel about straightwashing but this is NOT the way to achieve anything.

In conclusion: Please go and see Black Panther

anonymous asked:

what's your thoughts on people who lose that spark in their relationship?

Ok so someone once sent this to me and it makes sense to me, pretty much explains it:

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and a spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.” Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.
Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.
I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):
The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.
Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a “decision”. Not just a feeling.

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels, I drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills.
And all the ones that love me they just left me on the shelf.
My farewell.
So before I save someone else, I’ve got to save myself.
And before I blame someone else, I’ve got to save myself
And before I love someone else, I’ve got to love myself.
—  Save Myself, Divide, Ed Sheeran
To my fellow female gamers.

(This is about Overwatch, but it can be applied to most competitive games.)

Alright girls. Today I was playing some D.Va in competitive Overwatch. As usual, I was communicating on the voice chat, and as usual, people noticed I was a girl. One guy said to me, “congrats for being the only girl I’ve ever seen who’s not playing mercy.” 

Now, obviously I had noticed how many girls default to playing support - usually the game’s most standard and obvious support (OW Mercy, TF2 Medic, DOTA2 Crystal Maiden). I had some cheeky banter with my friend about a “basic bitch” in a match who was a girl playing mercy.

Yesterday, I queued up with a friend who invited his friend - a girl - and let me tell you something. Her quickplay stats were baffling to me. This girl had 98 hours on Mercy alone, her second most played only having 5 hours. She only had about 7 heroes with play time in total.

Being a fellow girl, I think I know why this is. Guys often like to show off by picking DPS/carry, even going so far as to refuse to change when it’s not a good pick. I’ve never seen this same scenario with girls. Of course I’ve met stubborn and toxic girls in-game, but even when asked, they will change. For example, I was playing a competitive game of Overwatch - attack on Hanamura. There was a girl playing Junkrat. I asked her if she was able to switch to Tracer or someone else who can dive so we could breach the defenses and she got extremely hostile at me but still changed to who I asked. She even played Mercy the next round (and blamed the loss on me because I asked her to change.)

Unlike many guys, girls most often avoid any confrontations or drama buy defaulting to supporting their other teammates. I’m not innocent of this either, I main Lucio, and used to be a support main in TF2 and DOTA2. However, once I realized, hey, I’m allowed to play DPS and carry my team, I started picking heroes besides supports and doing well.

I just wanted to get it out there: Girls, you’re allowed to carry. You’re allowed to be the star. You can do better than guys in games. Someone picks the character you wanted to carry as but is a much lower rank than you? Ask to swap. 70% of the time it will work. They don’t swap? Don’t just pick support and rely on them. I realize “picking whoever you want” can cost the game, but you’re all good and smart enough to still pick wisely, I know it.

Don’t feel bad about maining supports, I still main one in Overwatch. But I only ranked up by branching out, putting my foot down and saying “No, you’re not doing well on that hero, give me a go. Support me instead.”

Now get out there and instalock that Pharah!

Here’s the thing. I want Tony to apologize in IW. Not because he’s the only one in the wrong (far from it), but because that’s his character. Taking on the blame for what happens around him, for what he wishes he had done something to prevent, is what Tony does. And as satisfying as it would be to see Tony sipping his tea or blowing Steve off until he gets an apology, it’s just not the Tony we know. Tony who blames himself for Obadiah selling weapons, for Ultron, for AIM making human bombs because he was rude to a stranger at a party once. Taking responsibility for things that are not entirely his fault is such an integral part of his character I wouldn’t WANT to see it stripped away. (Not to mention if there’s an intergalactic threat, no way is Tony’s pride going to get in the way of going what has to be done,)

So here’s what I want instead. I want Tony to apologize and I want someone else, Steve or Sam or Clint or Wanda, to contradict him. I want Tony to hear that it wasn’t all his fault, that he made the best decisions he could under terrible circumstances. I want the NARRATIVE to contradict him for once and show us that, no matter how much Tony himself might believe it, he’s not to blame for every bad thing that happens around him. So don’t give me sassy unapologetic Tony. Give me a Tony who finally gets to hear that it’s not all his fault, and a movie that challenges the idea that Tony is to blame for everything he blames himself for.

How I imagine @thebootydiaries looks when someone takes her shit posts seriously.

Ok, I’ve wanted to draw her for a long time now, and now that Rapa got me these magnificent watercolors I thought now would be a great opportunity 😊

If she sees this, then I’m so very sorry if it’s not as good as everyone else’s fan arts, I’m only 13 please don’t blame me >-<

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YOI Future!Verse ABO AU, Visual Headcanon Web Charts #01

So I always wanted to make one of these. Turns out my headcanons for the most part are WAY too wordy for these things and uh, they’re a bit of a mess >.>;; BUT I hope nonetheless that they’re somewhat fun to read even if barely legible, it was fun to make ^ ^;

1. Super basic relationship chart of the core members of the lovely poly family in this AU.

2. “Adults Think,” the color of each adult indicates their feelings towards the person to whom the arrow is pointing.

3. “Kids Think,” the color of each OC kid indicates their feelings towards the person to whom the arrow is pointing.

There’s obviously a lot more to it than what could be crammed in the lil text boxes, but a gist and pretty much the first things that immediately popped into my mind regarding their interactions. 2 and 3 also mostly show their thoughts while the kids are younger, which will change a bit as they grow up, to be covered in a future post.

*Recommended you right click view image to see full size bc the text is tiny oops

Because the text is so illegible, text only versions of charts 2 and 3 beneath cut, all elaborated quite a bit because I’m so rambly oops:

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IF YOU ARE NEW TO THIS AU: It’s Yuuri-centric polyamory in an ABO setting, Yuuri’s married to four mates (Victor, Yurio, Phichit, Minami) and they have OC kids.

BASICS of this AU

INTRO to how ABO works in this AU

OTHER POSTS (comics + illustrations) in the Future!Verse ABO section of my YOI Masterpost.

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Please keep ship bashing out of the comments/tags. Don’t like, just skip <3 Thank you.

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PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, EDIT, OR OTHERWISE USE MY ART WITHOUT MY EXPLICIT PERMISSION. More detailed rules available on my Rules & FAQ Post.

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