i bet this looks like shit

I wonder how the pizza place next door feels everytime I stumble in, wearing the same clothes I’ve worn for 3 days, unwashed hair, no makeup, looking dead inside, and ask for a calzone. I bet they’re like “ shit here comes the Calzone Goblin, demanding substance and root beer once more”

TRADITIONAL ARTISTS LISTEN UP

OR ANY ARTIST THAT MAY DO TRAD ART AT SOME POINT

BC IVE SEEN THIS SHIT INFORMATION PERPETUATED ENOUGH TO GET ME PRETTY FUCKING HEATED

EVEN IN FUCKING ART SCHOOL I WAS TOLD LIES AND IM SURE YOU WERE TOO IF YOURE AN ADULT ARTIST SO PLS LISTEN

Keep reading

headcanon time! so @deohsogay and i were talking and as we all know, vasquez is a giant fucking lesbian and has been out and proud since she was in high school probably and long story short, her gaydar is off the charts

so OBVIOUSLY she has alex figured out from the moment she steps into the deo. and at first she’s not sure if alex is just lowkey and private but then she realises wow alex does not know that she is in fact a giant lesbian

and this amuses vasquez to no end because alex is the gayest gay to ever gay in the history of gay, and she has absolutely no idea. and after a while it gets to vasquez and she cant hold it in anymore so their conversations go a little like this

‘vasquez i got a new motorbike!’
‘gay’
‘huh?’
‘i said yay! how exciting!’

‘vasquez i went to the movies last night and saw this one with kristen stewart in it she’s so cool i really like her’
‘lesbian’
‘what was that?’
‘thespian! you love actors!’

and when maggie shows up on the scene, you bet your ass vasquez hears all about the stupid, short, dimpled cop with shiny eyes who annoys the shit out of alex and vasquez is like oh my god she has a crush is this what it feels like to be proud of your children and she watches closely at the way alex smiles when maggie is around and she sees the way maggie looks at alex and she’s like ‘i give them three months and theyll be engaged’

‘it’s okay, vasquez i dont need back up, maggie’s coming with me’
‘you are so gay’
‘excuse me?’
‘you sure youre okay?’

ANYWAY so after this back and forth for years, FINALLY alex approaches vasquez one day and is like ‘hey susan did you know that maggie and i are dating and also i am gay’

and vasquez goes OH THANK GOD! and she pulls out this huge fucking scrapbook and it’s called DEOh So Gay: The Gaygent Danvers Story by susan vasquez and it’s literally a scrapbook made up of sneaky photos she took of alex’s gayest outfits and also written down documentation of every time alex said or did something gay and alex is blushing and also laughing because she’s so happy she’s come so far and vasquez is a good friend and also maggie loves it and it sits on their coffee table for the rest of their lives

THE STYDIA KISS (and hug)- an Extra™ frame by frame analysis

ok so we start out with this shit. even before this frame, dude is staring at them Martin lips like he’s in the middle of the desert and they’re the only water for miles. Then we get here and they both go in OPEN goddamn MOUTH for this kiss. she is PUCKERED for him. She was puckered ten feet ago, she was puckered when she walked in the damn door, hell, she was puckered 3 months ago. She got her tongue fucking ready to dock at Port Stilinski Lips.

She comes in fucking Little Caesar’s Hot ‘N Ready with the hands on the neck. goddamn. And they are PRESSED into each other. If they were kissing any deeper they would swallow each other. Which now, come to think of it, might have been their goal.

Keep reading

alright! *cracks knuckles* let’s talk about klance! i know all these points have been made in other posts but i’m just irritated and want to make my own post lmfao. i don’t understand people who say keith and lance don’t have any chemistry/potential/”romantic” moments…like…are you watching the same show that i’m watching? you don’t have to like the ship, dude, but there is no denying there’s something going on.

lance, your bi is showing.

do i even need to talk about the, “we are a good team” scene? this was ridiculously gay. holy fuck. tender hand holding. EVEN THE WAY KEITH SAYS LANCE’S NAME IS TENDER. they just sit there holding hands the whole time. they could have let go, either one of them could have let go, dude. keith wasn’t helping lance up. he kneeled down next to him and just…fucking held his hand? those soft smiles? lance doing the “fond eyebrow raise”? gay. and i know the purple lighting is from the galra crystal, but like…wow this whole set up was romantic as hell. seriously, sit back and imagine if one of them were a girl. boom, romantic. everyone would see it. so why is it so hard for some of y’all to see it here? not to mention the fact that we never actually saw the supposed “cradling” (i refuse to believe “I cradled you in my arms!” refers to this hand holding. there has to be more. a full on cradle). that was probably so fucking gay. AND THE EPISODE RIGHT AFTER, WHEN LANCE IS IN THE HEALING POD, KEITH BEING AN IMPATIENT LITTLE FUCK, FULL ON POUTING, TAPPING THE POD BECAUSE ALLURA WON’T LET LANCE OUT OF IT YET. EVEN THOUGH SHE SAID “JUST A FEW MORE TICKS.”

like, this boy can’t even fucking wait a few ticks because he just wants to see lance. there is no way to deny that he wants to see lance, talk to him, probably about their bonding moment. i bet he thinks everything is going to be different between him and lance now. 

he’s also the last one to walk away from the pod. *eye emoji* why did they choose to show that? what was the Point? then, when lance comes out of the healing pod, keith gets this precious little smile on his face. he’s happy to see him. looking forward to talking about feelings and shit, most likely.

but! lance instantly flirts with allura and keith just says, “Classic.” he then proceeds to look salty as fuck with his signature broody arm crossing included. this poor boy. you’re killing him lance, you really are.

not to mention the many other times he has appeared jealous when lance is flirting. (”Jealousy, thy name is Keith.”) i’m not posting screencaps of all those moments because i’m so lazy and like i said, all these points have been made in other posts and i got other shit i’m focusing on. 

here it is, the iconic, “We had a bonding moment! I cradled you in my arms!” scene. listen. i honestly can’t even think of a reason why keith would bring this up, unless he has a big fat crush on lance. it just did not fit into the conversation at all. let me type it out for y’all even though you probably don’t need me to. we’ve analyzed this to hell and back already but…

Lance: “Wow. Thanks, everybody. Sounds like the mice did more than you, though.”
Keith: “I punched Sendak!”
Lance: “Yeah, apparently after I emerged from a coma and shot his arm off.”
Keith, looking completely fucking devastated: “We had a bonding moment. I cradled you in my arms!” (his voice CRACKS)

honestly, he looks like he just witnessed his world fall apart around him. #mood

i don’t know about you, but this would not be my reaction unless, like i said, i had a big fat crush on the other person. he looks so betrayed, oh my god. and lance…wow. lance says, “Nooope. Don’t remember, didn’t happen.” now, is it just me or is this totally lance being a little shit about the fact that keith didn’t remember him in the first episode when they’re saving shiro? i bet it is.

alright, now this here, this is my favorite. this screenshot is titled “GAY this is so fucking GAY” in my files because um? their faces? those are very fond and tender expressions. this whole scene was so gay i stg. keith was flirting up a storm with this boy and it was amazing. let’s not forget that the planet lance was on with nyma highkey had the bi flag colors and there was two rainbows in this episode. symbolism, guys. these things mean a lot and are very important in animation. (there’s a lot more symbolism that many people have pointed out, including what i said above but my ass don’t have the time to put them all here)

the flirtation is strong in this one. here’s some more moments (i probably didn’t put them all idk i can’t remember) where keith is either a) flirty or b) looking at lance with that oh so soft expression. he doesn’t really look at any of the other characters like this (definitely not at allura lmfao), at least not that i’ve noticed. correct me if i’m wrong. 

wow keith you’re soooo cool…

a very underappreciated Soft Look.

this whole scene kills me every time, i love everything about it.

PROUD OF LANCE FOR COMING UP WITH A SICK ASS PLAN!

this still haunts me. it haunts all of us. why!!! did!!! he!!! say!!! it!!! like!!! that!!! you can hear the winky face in his voice. the way he says this is equivalent to 100 winky faces. if you don’t think this is blatant flirting, you’re a lost cause.

of course you were. of course. you want his attention. it’s okay, we know, lance.

LOOK AT THAT SMIRK KEITH IS SPORTING!!! anyways, that is the face of someone flirting. i make the same damn face keith makes when i flirt. if one of them were a girl, IT WOULDN’T EVEN BE A QUESTION. IT WOULD BE OBVIOUS FLIRTING AND PEOPLE WOULD SHIP THE HELL OUT OF IT. but no, they’re two boys. dudes bein’ dudes. just guys bein’ bros. wow, what a great bromance.

now, just for shits and giggles, let us compare how keith looks when he’s literally cradling allura in his arms vs. when he’s holding hands with lance.

he deadass looks like this -_- with allura. there’s actually a fucking…slight frown on his face now that i really look at it, oh my god. even when allura removes herself and blushes, he still looks like that. now, wouldn’t you think that, hm…if they wanted it to be known that keith wants to smooch allura, they’d at least put a slight blush on his face to match allura’s or maybe have him appear to be a little flustered? 

he’s gay. i can’t imagine him not being gay. (imo, him being galra is a big metaphor for him being gay. coming to terms with who he is and “coming out” to the other paladins. everything hunk says to him in “The Belly of the Weblum” are common things straight people say to gay people. a lot of people in the fandom seem to agree with this, but maybe we’re all just reaching idk) i just feel like…someone who likes girls would have a different reaction than keith’s when faced with a beautiful girl like princess allura in their arms. yeah, i know, this has already been said. but!!! it’s!!! true!!! all of their “romantic” scenes together were awkward, forced and came right out of nowhere and keith just…had no reaction. compare that to all the faces he’s made at lance. yeah. the difference is ridiculously obvious.

there’s honestly so much more i want to add to this, stuff from the comics and more subtle things (including a screencap of lance’s face in “Escape from Beta Traz” when he’s talking about keith and how he does cool shit. boy had the most fond expression known to man. u know the one), but everything has already been said by someone else. i’ll end it by saying this, again, because i’m really fucking salty: if one of these boys were a girl, there would be ZERO question about the purpose of these interactions. it would all be seen as flirting and romantic. it’s such a common trope. red and blue. fire and ice. they balance each other out. peace the heck out.

I Don’t Believe that the figure Keith Pulled out of the Pod was Lotor

First of all, time-wise, it doesn’t make any sense with Haggar’s statement.

Assuming that character WAS Lotor, and they looked like their pod was lost in the belly of the weblum for a long time. The pod was practically grown over. That’s not someone who got trapped recently.

So, Keith just rescued someone who has been trapped, and possibly in stasis for a while.

Then Haggar is like “Summon Prince Lotor!” and not “Holy shit, after missing mysteriously for so long, Lotor is back!”

These are not the words for referencing someone who has just gotten back. This is summoning someone who is already around.

Secondly, and I will bet money on this:

The person in that pod is female.

Just look.

Like, I know voltron plays with body diversity, especially with alien bodies like Shay who doesn’t have a very “feminine human” silhouette, but that is a female body.

Also note that the character never speaks to Keith. This could be because it would be a givaway to the charatcer’s gender.

No, that isn’t Lotor.

I’m pretty sure that’s Keith’s mom.

Let's be honest

Context: Our team’s halfling monk (Orivan) held a candle for my character, a halfling bard (Ava). I’d been dropping subtle hints the entire campaign that it wasn’t going to work out. The party just found a nice pair of boots on a dead body.

Warlock: Hey, these look nice! I bet they’re good for dancing in *puts them on, does a jig*

Orivan: Maybe I should wear them then! They could help me when I dance with Ava

Ava: Uh, nah. That’s not gonna happen

~Later, in battle~

Ava: Who wants some inspiration?

Orivan: Oh! I do!

Ava: Well, alright! A limerick for you. 

You know that I don’t like to be rudes,
So I’ll put it a way that’s not crudes:
If you’re looking to dance 
You don’t have a chance
Coz Ava’s just not into dudes.

Orivan: …

Orivan: I don’t feel very inspired :(

Ava: Too bad, you’ve got inspiration

6

I loved this scene so much.

Obi-Wan in Anakin’s room, picking up his stuff, sitting on his bed.

But also Obi-Wan knows Anakin is lying to him about Padme & his feelings, and he looks so hurt. He just wants to help him, but Anakin never lets him. And Anakin in the last gif looks like he’s holding back a “wait”, almost reaching out to stop Obi-Wan from leaving. He wants to tell him, he doesn’t want to lie to him. He wants help.

Some of my fav pics of Haechan

Author’s Note: This pic set includes:

Cute Haechan, Candid Haechan, Rude Haechan, Boyfriend Haechan and Pre-debut Haechan! (plus, captions expressed by yours truly)

// Putting this under a “keep reading” bcuz its hella long srz no I’m not lmao //

Keep reading

the elevator scene analysis

so here’s my over-analysis on the elevator scene that nobody asked for. i hope you’re ready for Keith being a pining little shit

so Lance decides to check out the pool. of course he would! he grew up on the beach and is the guardian spirit of water. that’s totally something he’d be all over. he loves swimming.

so it’s kinda interesting that Keith of all people would also want to go swimming. he’s the polar opposite of Lance, he’s the fire paladin. water isn’t really his thing tbh? (doesn’t mean he can’t enjoy swimming though, but you get what i mean)

while it could just be coincidental that he decided to go check out the pool at the same time Lance did, i get the feeling Keith found out Lance was going swimming and wanted to join him but pretended that he didn’t know what Lance was doing ‘cause he doesn’t wanna make it obvious that there’s something else he wants to check out

what do you mean “what do you think you’re doing?” Keith??? he’s wearing swim trunks and a towel and is on the same elevator as you how can you not make the obvious conclusion that he’s going swimming???? you’re a terrible liar 

okay look, i know how i get when i have a crush on somebody. i will find literally any excuse to be around them, but will try to downplay it and make it seem like i totally don’t care. i’d recognize that kinda behavior anywhere. and Keith? totally trying to downplay it right now. “i just so happened to want to go swimming at the same time my crush did and stopped him in the elevator before he could go without me but pffsh i totally am NOT trying to find an excuse to be around him. i’ll prove it by making sure he knows we will be on opposite ends of the pool and i’m totally not interested in being around him!”

okay Keith, i think we get the point ;D (the way he says this line sounds so forced like he’s trying not to make things awkward oh my god)

if you go back and watch this scene, Keith looks over at Lance first. probably because he just realized he got stuck in an elevator, with his crush, while wearing bathing suits. the first thing running through his mind right now is probably “hHOL YSsHIT”

Lance looks over at Keith like “are you fucking kidding me right now” 

and Keith is like “shit gotta keep acting like this is the opposite of the best day of my life”

so anyways we cut back to this scene after a brief moment with Pidge and Hunk, and while i bet Keith would come up with any excuse to get close to Lance, i like to think it was Lance’s idea to crawl up the elevator shaft like this. he’s the kind of person who would come up with crazy ideas like this if he was that determined to get to the pool. i have absolutely no doubt Keith was internally screaming the whole time.

he proceeds to bicker with Lance like usual and they shove each other. if you look closely after Keith shoves Lance back though, you’ll notice he keeps leaning against Lance more than before. probably ‘cause he’s secretly enjoying the physical contact

lmao

poor Lance, he just wants to go swimming. let the dolphin boy swim

Keith: this is literally one of the best things that has ever happened to me don’t ruin it

Keith spots the vent shaft and they finally get out of there

listen, i don’t know if it was just intentional but it seriously looks like these two aren’t looking in the same direction. Lance is looking up at the vent shaft like “finally, thank god” whereas Keith looks like he’s just staring at nothing in particular, probably thinking to himself “well this was exciting but now we get to go swimming which is gonna be even better. nice”

tl;dr: Keith found out Lance was going swimming so he wanted to as well but pretended like it was just a coincidence, and totally was secretly enjoying the fact that he got trapped in an elevator with his crush. and based on all the pining!Keith evidence we have so far, i don’t see why this can’t be the case.

Jeff Atkins imagine #1

Request: jeff atkins imagine where u guys go to jess’ pool party and he’s really sweet and cute to u, fluff!!

Originally posted by words-plus-wisdom

a/n this is my first imagine so take it easy on me;))


This is the one mess id never thought id get myself into, but yet here i am at one of Jess’s famous high school parties. Jeff Atkins, the boy i never thought id talk to, was the one that dragged me here. I guess helping Clay tutor Jeff made him and I acquaintances of some sort. But sitting here, alone in the back yard, made me think otherwise.

“Hey y/n! i n-never thought id see you here.” Jess’s drunken self sauntered her way over, practically falling on top of me.

“Nice to see you too Jess.” I’ve never seen her like this before, its like a whole new world.

“So i heard that Jeff the hotty Atkins was the one who brought you here.” she stated making googly eyes at me. “and i must say that you two would like very cute together, i ship it!”

As she finished her sentence you look towards the beer pong table, just in time to see Jeff win yet again another game. He caught your eye just as you were about to look away.

“Look who is coming right our way y/n, i guess i should leave you two alone.” she sent a wink my way just as Jeff took the seat she was just in.

Looking down trying to hide my blush, i heard Jeff mutter ‘nice party!’ to Jess as she was going in her house. Butterflies started to form in my stomach, something that seems to happen whenever i am next to Jeff.

“No alcohol tonight?” I asked. I could’ve sworn a jock like Jeff would already be wasted passed out somewhere.

“Actually no, never really drink at parties other than a beer or two. Im usually the designated driver.” he turned towards me. “How about you though, enjoying yourself?”

‘Better now that you're here’ she thought. “Actually not as bad as i thought it would be, Maybe you should bring me to parties more often.” I almost cringed at how bad that line was. Trying to save myself, i continued, “i mean if you want to, its all up to you.”

Jeff suddenly grabbed her hand. ‘what is he doing?’ I suddenly thought. “y/n if im being honest with you, i actually really enjoy your company. Usually these parties consist of me beating everyone in beer pong.” Laughing at his statement, i finally look at him in the eyes. ‘damn those eyes’. “lets make a bet out of this actually, if you can make this beer can into the trash over there ill take you to every party i go to.” he stated.

‘But what if i miss? What will you get out of this?” I was honestly confused. “Its a surprise, now do we have a deal?” ‘i suck at sports’ I suddenly thought, but I was not backing down. “ You have a deal Atkins.” I stated shaking hands with the baseball player.

I took the beer can and and aimed the best I could, finally letting the can go out of my hands. It was like slow motion in the air, but just as i thought i was winning the bet, it hit the edge and bounce out. “Shit!” I cursed.

Jeff laughed at your reaction to losing the bet. ‘i never lose do i?’ He thought to himself, ‘now or never i guess.’ 

“Come on! That’s not fair.” i stated with a frown. “so i guess you wo-” suddenly my sentence was cut of with a pair of soft lips.

Once i realized it was Jeff, My world stopped. ‘is this actually happening? am i actually kissing the boy I’ve liked since the beginning of freshmen year? holy shit!’ So many thoughts were racing through my head.

He pulled away slowly muttering against your lips,”was that okay? because it was totally okay for me.” i slowly pulled away looking into his eyes and said the first thing that came to mind. 

“It was better than okay.”

A Petty and Salty Party

Context: A somewhat steampunk-y twist on the normal D&D world. Our party got hired by a mysterious archaeologist(Taphir) with an airship to go to some ruins and recovers a set of books that the Evil Government and who knows who else wanted to get their hands on as well. After facing off against and ultimately evading a bronze dragon(something I, as a silver Dragonborn, was highly uncomfortable with), we decided that we didn’t like not being told the whole story. While we continued in his employ, we didn’t make it easy on him…

In the first room of the ruins, we encountered a pair of giant scorpions. We set about fighting them while our archaeologist ignored them and studied some runes on the wall and recorded them with his notebook.

Me, Dragonborn Ranger: Is there enough room for me to sort of orbit around the scorpion and put it right between me and Taphir?

DM: Um… Yeah, ok, I guess so.

Me: Ok, good. I’d like to take a shot at his notebook.

DM, over the party’s laughter: Oh, my god. All right, go for it, but it’s gonna be a small target…

I roll just high enough to clip the binding at the top of the book, causing Taphir to look over at me disparagingly.

Me, in a “totally convincing” apologetic tone: Oh, wow, jeez, I’m sorry, I guess I missed the scorpion, sorry….

DM, laughing: Good god, y'all are petty…

Entire Party: You bet we are!

6: “Marry me” (part 2 from the 5/6 request, also andreil!)

It takes 4 months and 2 weeks to organize Matt’s proposal to Dan. 

Neil knows because he’s been pretending to understand most of what Matt says to him for 4 months and 2 weeks.

It’s not that he’s not happy for them, it’s just that being told to celebrate love feels like being told to celebrate the way the world turns, or the gravity that continues to pin us like the bar on a rollercoaster seat. Neil celebrates love by staying alive to see it. He celebrates it by keeping it.

He looks at prospective rings and says they’re fine over and over again. He dutifully tells Dan nothing even when she asks outright. He answers the phone when Matt calls him in a panic at midnight and says “what if she says no” so many times that Neil hands the phone to Nicky.

It does make him think though, about Andrew. Without meaning to.

He doesn’t think of it as marriage in his head (to Neil, marriage has always been something that swallows you like quick sand). Tying himself to Andrew though — having something legally binding like Neil Josten on his documents, like their names on the lease, like his contract with his team — that means something to Neil.

Being with Andrew is the thrill of being in the game, but having it on paper would be like points blinking onto a scoreboard. He knows he’s scoring now, but he wants the crowd to know too. He wants this win to stick.

He doesn’t mention it because it doesn’t matter, ultimately. Neil doesn’t need other people to tell him that they love each other.

Andrew scoops Sir off Neil’s lap and smuggles him to his side of the couch. He pours one bowl of sugar crisp and one bowl of granola in the morning. He catches Neil’s sleeve before he goes for a run and uses every ounce of 5 AM energy he has to hold Neil’s eyes. Neil knows how he feels.

But he really does support Matt and Dan, separate from the way he’s scared of hospital rooms he won’t be allowed into or the box on a form that labels them ‘roommates’ like that’s anywhere close to enough.

The engagement lines up with a weekend that all the original foxes are scheduled to meet up on, scraped together by Matt’s meticulous hands and Nicky’s constant phone calls.

Andrew isn’t interested in going, but Neil asks, so. They’re the first ones there.

Keep reading

Andreil Quits Smoking

so i somehow messed up answering your ask directly, but this was requested by @vexingcosmos! i’m sorry it took me forever, but i actually did some research because i know NOTHING about smoking. also, this got long. like…really long. 


  • it began as most things do, where the Foxes are concerned: with a bet
  • it’s a Friday night and the Monsters have come to Columbia, and for once, the upperclassmen were allowed to come along
  • Matt’s birthday was on Wednesday, and he just wants to hang out with his best friend and favorite human Neil okay let him live
  • so Neil *asked* Andrew and well…we all know how that goes
  • the whole gang is having a grand ol’ time
    • Aaron, Nicky, Allison, and Dan have been on the dance floor practically since the second they walked into Eden’s
    • Allison dragged a reluctant Renee out to join them within the first hour, and this girl can DANCE don’t fight me on this 
    • Kevin has been drunk since before they even left Sweetie’s (snuck in a flask, the little troublemaker)
    • he’s so far gone that he couldn’t even tell you who the first striker in Exy history to reach 1,000 goals was. he may or may not be aware that he is swaying.
    • Matt has been hanging out at the table with Neil and a rather annoyed Andrew
  • Matt has convinced Neil to take way too many shots for his tiny body to handle, but Andrew is there, so he’s trying not to worry about it 
  • sometime around the seventh shot, the rest of the gang makes their way over to the table
  • Andrew’s hand is on Neil’s thigh, and his pointer finger has been tapping incessantly for the past twenty minutes
    • and Neil can only take so much, even from Andrew
    • he stares at Andrew as subtly as he can (i.e. not very) in an effort to catch his attention
  • Andrew eventually drags his gaze over to Neil and lazily cocks his head to the side, as if to say what could you possibly want at this moment in time, Neil
    • Neil looks pointedly to Andrew’s hand and then jerks his head towards the exit
  • Neil is, of course, very unsubtle with all of this
    • Kevin turns to stare at them and says, in a barely intelligible voice, “if you’re gonna hook up, you could at least wait until we’re back at the house and i’m passed tf out”
    • Nicky laughs and says, “aww Kev c’mon, let the munchkins have playtime whenever they want”
  • Andrew is about to turn his whiskey glass into a weapon for the munchkin comment when Aaron suddenly pipes in
    • “nah, Andrew needs to take care of his other habit”
    • it is now very quiet in their group of normally very loud people
  • everyone looks to Aaron for him to clue them in on what he means
    • everyone except Renee, who has silently moved closer to Andrew just in case he really does decide to use that whiskey glass
  • Aaron continues: “you know what smoking does to your body over time, right? i assume i don’t need to go all Bill Nye on your ass and draw you a picture”
    • Aaron becomes Dr. Minyard when he is very drunk. trust me.
    • Andrew doesn’t say anything, just stares at Aaron. is he even blinking? probably not
  • “who am i kidding. you don’t care. you’ll just let this ruin you. i bet you couldn’t quit even if you tried” 
  • that gets everyone’s attention
    • Nicky: “did he just say the B word”
    • Allison: “looks like it’s that time again where i get even richer”
    • Matt, softly: “oh shit”
  • Neil is about to jump in and open up a can of whoop ass on Aaron when Andrew’s steady voice comes from beside him
  • “fine”
  • everyone, collectively: “WHAT”
  • Andrew rolls his eyes. “fine. i bet that i can quit completely within a week”
    • complete silence. everyone just stares. shock. disbelief. 
  • Andrew gets up and starts heading towards the exit, dragging Neil along with him 

********

  • Neil decides to join Andrew in Operation Quit Smoking
  • but two days into it, they’re both at their wits end
  • they definitely aren’t about try anything medication-related, for obvious reasons
  • after doing a bit of research related to natural methods like adding more of certain vitamins into your diet, Neil confronts Andrew
    • “you know we have to. we don’t have another choice”
    • “fuck you, i’m not doing that”
    • “Andrew. it’s our last option.”
    • [after a long, defeated sigh] “fine. but you have to ask him”
  • so Neil does the one thing he wished he’d never have to do with anything that isn’t Exy
  • he asks Kevin to help
  • when they wake up the next day, Kevin has printed out color-coded meal plans for both Andrew and Neil
    • Andrew Minyard does not cry. But let me tell you. Looking at that list of food options…it was an extremely close call.
    • on every single day, the breakfast item was a green smoothie
    • Andrew thought he’d rather just pay the entire $500 betting pool off himself
  • but Neil. precious, precious Neil. tells Andrew that they can definitely do it, and wouldn’t it be great to prove Aaron wrong and make him lose money that he probably would have spent on Katelyn?
  • so they pull themselves up by their metaphorical bootstraps and follow all of Kevin’s rules. every. single. one. 
  • halfway to their deadline, Andrew finally wants to kill everyone slightly less than he did yesterday. he marks this as massive progress. 
  • Neil didn’t really smoke in the first place, but he’s still having trouble finding something to replace that feeling he gets from the smell
    • he’ll be okay without it, he thinks. he has Andrew to keep him steady, to ground him when he feels like he could float away from reality for good
  • by the following Friday, the Foxes have gathered in the girls’ room to hear the final word and settle their bets
  • Kevin has become the official referee of this particular bet
  • everyone waits in suspense, heartbeats flying at the thought of all the cash they are either about to lose or gain
  • Kevin takes his role seriously, as he does everything else
  • “i declare that, as of this day at 4:27 pm, Andrew and Neil have gone three consecutive days without one cigarette. i predict that they will be able to continue resisting, if they keep following my suggested guidelines”
    • the last bit is said with a hard look at Neil and Andrew. of course.
    • Allison, Matt, and Dan don’t try to hide the smug looks on their faces as Aaron and Nicky hand over entirely too much for a bunch of college students to bet with
    • Renee chose not to participate, but her new bruises say that she’s been helping Andrew cope all week
    • Aaron grudgingly looks back to Andrew, holding out his hand with his share of the winnings
    • Andrew just stares at him. blinks. turns around and walks out the door. 
  • Neil edges out of the room to follow him up to the roof while everyone is arguing over who gets Andrew’s share, since he’s obviously not taking it
  • Neil reaches Andrew and sits beside him with their shoulders touching
  • they’re looking out over campus when Neil turns to Andrew
  • “i’m proud of you”
  • Neil gets a disgusted scoff and a hand pushing his face away in return
  • “you’re still a junkie”
Imagine Castiel outing your secret relationship with him

Gif submitted by the beautiful @sortaathief

“So I had her legs wrapped around my head,” Dean’s eyes widen in delight as he recounted last night’s venture. You half listened, eyes glanced over at Castiel; who was standing over Sam as he researched on his laptop. The angel looked at you and smiled softly; you looked down to your lap, trying to hide a smirk.

“And then she did this one thing with her tongue,” Dean groaned in remembrance. You laughed and playfully shoved the hunter.

“Yeah, I heard you,” you smirked.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Rfa+minor trio reacting to mc being the worst cook in history but she looks so goddamn optimistic that they cant say her food is shit so its THE SHIT

✿ i may or may not have done some of these things over the years. which ones? guess.

Yoosung

  • Didn’t realize someone could mess up more than him.
  • It’s not that your food is misshapen. Yoosung’s food is misshapen. Yours positively looks diseased - like, what are those weird spots
  • are those sesame seeds?
  • why did you put sesame seeds in your eggs.
  • Tries to be kind about correcting your mistakes, and is as endlessly positive as you are about improving.
  • “It’s really good now! But I bet if we do this, it’ll be even better!”
  • This man learns to lie like a saint.

Zen

  • Since you’re the perfect person, you have to be the perfect cook, right?
  • WRONG.
  • WRONG.
  • ZEN HAS NEVER BEEN MORE WRONG IN HIS LIFE, AND HE IS THE KING OF POOR DECISIONS.
  • there is absolutely no way he’s going to spoil that delightful expression on his face though so he chugs beer to drown out the taste of Sin Itself.
  • Treats eating your cooking as a harrowing experience he must go through where the reward is your smile.
  • Always has beer with his meals, though. Always.

Jaehee

  • She grew up in an abusive household where her presence was constantly dismissed, derided, and unwanted, and she still has never experienced anything as awkward as this moment.
  • How do you not know?
  • How do you not see?
  • THE MEAT IS BURNED ON THE OUTSIDE AND RAW ON THE INSIDE, HOW DID YOU DO THIS.
  • She tries to tell you but you’re just
  • you’re just so happy and
  • She starts walking cooking shows with you and prays it’ll do something to fix the travesty that is your food.

Jumin

  • Never, not once, has Jumin encountered bad cooking, so he doesn’t actually realize you’re doing anything wrong.
  • He just think’s that putting a cup of black pepper instead of a tablespoon into food is “a thing commoners do”, and treats it like a curiosity.
  • “How peculiar. Does the spiciness disguise the poor quality of the ingredients?”
  • “I see… is the texture both crunchy and hard to compensate for the pasta’s blandness?”
  • “Hmn… do the black parts give it extra flavor?”
  • doesn’t understand why you get mad after that. oops.

707

  • He puts his hands on his shoulders. He stares into your eyes. “MC,” he says gravely, like he’s about to deliver a terminal diagnosis. “I regret to inform you that you cannot cook.”
  • your heart is shattered to pieces, but before you can emotionally collapse, Seven continues.
  • “However, my love! Do not despair. This affords us with an excellent opportunity. Do you know what that is?”
  • You shake your head mutely, and Seven’s grin lights up the room.
  • “I can’t cook either. So together, we’re going to make the worst dish possible, and we’re going to force everyone else to eat it.”
  • It becomes a game. The rest of the RFA thinks you and Seven are unaware of how bad your Ratatouille de Actual Live Rats with Diced Grape Tomato Sauce actually is, and while they’d tell Seven to buzz off, they can’t tell you. So faced with your unending cheer, they eat it.
  • They consume it.
  • You make a corporate heir, a famous actor, and a former secret agent consume your terrible cooking.
  • you are monsters.

V

  • Doesn’t grimace. Doesn’t cower. Doesn’t say a word. He just smiles and says “thank you” when you present him al dente pasta that probably hasn’t actually ever touched water.
  • It’s not a lie. It’s genuine. This man doesn’t care that it’s garbage. You being happy and you trying to make him happy by spending time on something is enough for him.
  • Even when you ruin a slow cooked pot-roast by putting jelly in it.
  • Even then, he still smiles, eats it, and says he loves you.

Unknown (Saeran)

  • Like his twin, he’s also bad at cooking. Unlike his twin, he isn’t going to admit it, and he unknowingly joins you in being a terrifying force in the kitchen.
  • Dishes become exponentially worse when touched by the two of you. Saeran wants to add sprinkles, you want to add frosting, and suddenly your lasagna looks like a birthday cake.
  • “Let’s add candles! It can be dessert.”
  • The person who bears the brunt of your abuse is Seven, who doesn’t have the heart to tell either of you how awful your food is.
  • It culminates in you sending him to the hospital.
  • You’re enrolled in classes after that, becoming a poor home ec teacher’s problem.

Vanderwood

  • Vanderwood wakes up at 3AM to find you sobbing over the stove, its glass top shattered and spices scattered everywhere on the floor.
  • Apparently, you’d been possessed by the fae desire to make gingerbread cookies. Apparently, you were also too short to reach the cinnamon and cloves the recipe called for, and - in your flailing - the glass bottles all spilled out of the cabinet, breaking the stove, hitting you on the head, and scattering all over the floor.
  • In a vacuum, this might be an incidence of clumsy-cute, but you do this constantly. In a previous life you must have angered the god of cooking because kitchen appliances are always trying to kill you.
  • Vanderwood had to save you when you got your hair caught in the mixer. Vanderwood has had to bandage your wounds when you burned yourself on the stove. Vanderwood has had to help you pick up all the groceries from a collapsed fridge, and Vanderwood proceeds to baby-proof the kitchen and ban you from unsupervised cooking.
  • It’s for your own good, they say. I don’t want to come in here and find your decapitated body.
  • there is not a lot you can do in the face of their Motherly Tone.

[11]

“And none of this information is foreboding or directly relevant to what’s about to happen in any way whatsoever.”

I’m guessing the princess in Shirasaki castle is Tomoyo predecessor, because she has the bell and the amazing headpiece going on. 

I also want to make an intelligible comment about Kuropapa’s smile but all that’s coming to mind is holy shit. 

WELL I GUESS NOW WE KNOW WHY KUROGANE LIKES MOKONA SO MUCH, HUH?