I'm going to make it clear that I'm not with any ship I prefer independent Kara, but you really like what they're doing on the show with her snatching her feminist stance from the first season, it would not be better if they waited for Mon-El to be at same level as Kara and make a relationship of equals instead of this so anti-feminist? Maybe you ignore me but I had to ask
Thanks for your ask.
I think you’re confusing independent and single. Being in a relationship doesn’t exclude being independent, as it means making your own decisions and owning up to your opinion. To me, in retrospect, Kara was less independent in season 1 than she is now in season 2.
She spent a whole season secretly pining for a man who was committed to a romantic relationship without ever really moving on. Kara kept gravitating around him, and he let her; and ke kept gravitating around her in a way that she could never really move on.
Also, romances aside, Kara was very much dependent to Alex and Cat. Remember all those times Kara sought advice or even support from either or one of them. After Cat left, Kara lost her mentor, and as such, had to learn to trust her own judgment and make choices without waiting on anybody’s input first.
Kara is now in a relationship with Mon-El but she is more independent that she ever was in season 1 and this is what their bickering/arguments let on. Even after just getting together with him, she didn’t let herself influenced by Mon-El’s suspicions towards Jeremiah, and when she eventually did, it wasnt because she wanted to please her boyfriend but because she realized that her father’s behavior was off.
As for Mon-El not being at her level, I will skip the part about how love looks beyond flaws and prejudices because it’s cheesy and I will go straight to the message that the writers want to relay. It is about acceptance: accepting that people with their differences can offer as much as anybody else. Mon-El is far from perfect but he’s still a good person who just needed a little push to reveal it. That is how we, as an audience, have watched Kara transition from mentoree to mentor. She made some mistakes along the way (2x05 for example) and achieved successes (2x09 when she inspired him to want to become a superhero) and this new role has been a whole journey to developing a new side of Kara.
This is when you realize, that by ‘changing’ Mon-El, she changed too; she became this strong, independent and determined woman who cannot be stopped. And see what happened in the last episode: when Snapper fired her, she didn’t turn to James or Cat to get her job back -like she had at the beginning of the season- because she has become this confident woman who is aware that making difficult decisions can often come with severe consequences. And this was one of them. Sure she was sad but she wasn’t unsettled like her world had just crumbled, which is why she said “being Supergirl and having you is enough”, not because her life revolves around her boyfriend but because she’s thinking like an adult who looks at things clearly and with emotional distance and that is because she’s gained so much confidence that she knows she will find another job, eventually. In this season, Kara has built herself solid bearings (and yes, Mon-El is her romantic one just like Alex is another one of them) that she can keep sight of whenever a situation goes rocky.
Mon-El isn’t her everything (as the word dependent would suggest), he is one of the things that matter in her life and that she can turn to when she needs it. And that is what being in a relationship means, it means choosing to lean on another person, to listen to their opinion and trust their judgment or choosing not to follow it if you disagree.
Which is exactly what Kara has been doing with Mon-El and even more than when she was that single (indeed), unconfident girl who ran to Cat, James or Alex every time she felt things diverted from their normal/usual path.
Sorry for the rant, but I hope it will help you get a glimpse of my perspective. :)