i am too much of a perfectionist

Hey babes! My valentine for you this year is a simple Self-Love tarot spread.


1. Something to love about myself.
What’s so great about me? What am I getting right in life? What makes me special? What can I love about myself right now?

2. Where in life can I be more patient with myself?
What am rushing myself to do? Where am I in such a hurry to grow that I need to take a breath and slow down? In what areas of life am I too much of a perfectionist?

3. Where in life can I be kinder to myself?
Do I treat myself the same way I treat others? What unimportant stuff have I been beating myself up about? How can I treat myself better?

4. Energies and strategies to draw on.
What energies can I bring in, and what strategies can I use to foster a better relationship with myself?


This spread can also be used to review and improve relationships with others. Just ask all the same questions about your relationship.

Wishing you all a happy Valentine’s Day! Much love!

Welp. Okay so we’re doing this.


He knows he has to tell her. Every small action that’s ever transpired between them is all leading up to this final moment, these few seconds. Their life changes once his feet finish crossing the room to where she stands, looking more like herself than she ever has. His hands find movement before his voice finds words, one hand coming to cup her face. She looks surprised, but he can see in her eyes she isn’t, she’s been waiting for this as long as he has.

“I want to tell you-”

“Please,” her voice is barely above a whisper, and he feels his own anxiety multiplied by her plea. He doesn’t know what she’s asking, but he desperately wants to press on, to let her discover what they can create together. “I don’t want to lose you.”

“You can’t,” he immediately assures her, pulling her closer to him. “You could never lose me. I’m bonded to you.”

“And I won’t abuse that!”

“You could never!

“Cut!” Kid cried, breaking Soul’s concentration and also the dialogue he had been effortlessly running for his character the first time since he had started this damn film. He watches Maka drop character too, her misty awe fading into annoyance very quickly.

The set busts forth with action, makeup artists retouching Maka’s makeup while Soul zeros in on his PA, Tsugumi’s faithful self already has his cigarette out of the pack and his lighter in one hand, and a trenta iced black coffee in the other. She gives him a grin, and he nods back at her. Maka’s agent slithers up between them two of them, massive grin on his face.

“Damn! The chemistry between you two is wild! It’s amazing, usually we can’t get Maka to emote for shit.”

“I can still fire you whenever, you know.” Maka spits at her blue haired agent, glare reflected in his shades. He scoffs, smacking Soul on the back hard, and completely pushing him off his mark. Kid howls in anguish, stomping over to his two leads.

Usually, Soul wouldn’t work on a movie like this. He’s better suited for the dark indie movies, where he’s a struggling artist dealing with his demons via drug addiction and self destructive behavior. But this? This film has the potential to be a damn hit, even if it means working with the most neurotic perfectionist this side of the Rockies. He hears Maka suck in a breath, already practicing her composure for the next fifteen minute “critique.”

“No! No no no!” Kid cries, already worked up too much for a Monday morning at eight am. “Damn if she’s leaving you in this scene! She is telling you, her most loyal follower and protector that she has to do what’s right, and she has to leave you! This is a pivotal moment, where we recognize how much this rebellion means to her.”

“I know.” Maka snaps, composure almost instantly breaking. “I read your script. Several times. That’s what we’re doing!”

“No! You’re not! You two are looking at each other like you’re about to ravish each other! I’m looking for “melancholy”, not “desperately about to wreck the fuck out of each other before they finish their next sentence!” You two are killing me! Take ten and learn how to look fucking sad and we’ll take it from there.“

Maka is stomping off before he even finishes yelling at them, Blake running over what’s trending and how he’s told her more than a few times not to be a shit to directors. Soul groans, heading over to where Tsugumi stood with his vices ready for him.

That isn’t the first note regarding their stares that Kid has given them. The movie is going to be a hit, it’s going to change his career, and it’s going to be the film that finally brings his family to realize he was right about himself the whole time, but there was just one damn problem.

He desperately wants to hook up with Maka Albarn.

What it’s like to be autistic

I posted this on reddit in reply to someone asking about what it’s like to be on the spectrum. It ended up being really long so I thought I’d repost it here just for sharing’s sake. Slightly edited for formatting, but otherwise untouched.  Also if this actually ends up getting reblogged, this post is SFW but be warned that my Tumblr is often NSFW and I don’t tag shit, so remember that if you get curious and look at other posts.

As always, individual experiences will vary, and no two autistic people have the same life experiences or symptom expression. These are my own.

— (begin post) —

Different person here, but still on the spectrum (aspergers).

For me, in description rather than just declaration of the actual diagnosis, it’s many things.

It’s having no social intuition and relying on consciously analyzing social situations in order to navigate them. Constantly being unsure if you’re saying the right thing, or if you understood what the other person was saying if they were being figurative. Having extreme issues telling the difference between what’s literal and what’s a joke. Accidentally offending people by saying something you thought there was nothing wrong with, but was actually a major social faux pas. Rarely having the right words to say when you’re supposed to be speaking, and always having too much to say about things that it is obvious that nobody else seems to care about. Also, it is difficult to learn and understand and continually interpret appropriately when you’re socially expected to be dishonest. Until countless bad experiences broke me of it, I assumed the average person was far more honest than they actually were - it took until my early 20s (I’m 25 now) to start to clue in to the fact that neurotypicals lie constantly, and that not only is this normal, it’s expected. I had always been someone who overshared and avoided mistruths (it’s often said that aspies actively seek and expect truths and facts), and it took a conscious effort to break myself of this social incongruity. I still overshare more than a normal person, to a great degree.

It’s being unable to natively read body language. Imagine that you went to Mexico with Spanish as a second language, and only started to learn Spanish as an adult. Maybe you even got pretty good at Spanish, but yours is still not perfect. It’s not natural to you, it always seems to take a second longer for you to “get it” compared to native speakers, and many things which are commonplace conversation to any native speaker always seem to get lost on you, no matter how many times you hear it. You’ll always be missing something. For me, it’s quite like that with body language - it’s artificial and disconnected, it doesn’t come naturally, and it’s an intentional effort to really try to both convey yourself in a socially expected fashion and an active attempt to understand others’ body language beyond the most basic of examples. Body language feels like a second language to me.

It’s having difficulties processing and tolerating environmental stimulation and sensory input (especially sound, in my case). Some things that don’t bother anyone else will bother the fuck out of me, especially particularly strong or strange bad smells, or overstimulating lights or color patterns, or extremely loud but varied noise (loud consistent noise doesn’t bother me, but if it’s varied it drives me insane - this is part of why crowds are awful), or particularly unusual textures and tastes (I’m the pickiest eater I know because I get extremely strong negative reactions to bad textures and tastes in my mouth, to the point where I will gag if I try to force myself to eat something that’s very unpleasant). Touch can be pretty bad too - “weird” feeling objects, especially slimy/wet/cold things, feel incredibly awkward and unpleasant to touch or be in contact with most of the time (this is probably why I waste way too much water doing the dishes, in addition to my perfectionist nature and germophobia/aversion to uncleanliness).

Processing sound can be especially difficult - I am not hard of hearing, but I genuinely thought that I was before I learned of my condition. I can hear extremely quiet things just fine, but I have great difficulty discerning details when there are many noises in contest, which leads to me having to ask people to repeat themselves constantly in mixed (and especially noisy) environments.

Eye contact. Important enough that it deserves its own subheading separate from body language. Simply put, it doesn’t come naturally. I will often have entire conversations with people without ever looking at them, and unless I am consciously forcing myself to make eye contact, if I ever speak about something at length I will inevitably avert my eyes in some random direction without ever thinking about why I’m doing so, or even noticing that I’ve done so. Further, direct eye contact induces a lot of anxiety, stress, and unpleasantness - particularly with people that I am unfamiliar with or not on friendly terms with, eye contact can be downright painful.

Speaking of anxiety, social anxiety is very often comorbid with the autism spectrum. And it’s awful. It’s terrifying to interact with new people with no preexisting social context, and still kind of scary when there is a social context. I get tremors when I have to make phone calls or write important emails, I tap my feet and pace around with my phone in hand like an idiot walking aimlessly. I briefly worked as a cashier at a dollar store, and quit very quickly because I was having panic attacks and nearly vomiting just from having to make constant direct social interactions with a steady flow of strangers with a performance expectation (handling money accurately while being watched). And it’s more than just communication - this sounds silly, but I literally cannot dance in front of other people - like, in private it looks silly but I can *technically* do it, but in front of other people, I will freeze up and be unable to do anything if I try, as if I am paralyzed or frozen in place, minus nervous fidgeting or twitching. And in general SA is so pronounced that it could have its own entire post dedicated to it.

On the note of OCD that you asked, there exists some small overlap sometimes, and I definitely experience on a mild level the neurotic paranoia and compulsive feelings that are commonly associated with it, but I would not say that I have OCD, just some symptom overlap.

And there’s so much more to it (this is probably ~half? of the things? ish?), but I’m getting to an awfully long post already (far longer than I expected to end up writing), and I’d rather not make people read even more wall of text. I hope this helps feed your curiosity.

— (end post) —

I probably should have rewritten this for tumblr, but I didn’t want to put in the effort to reassemble it. I think it mostly stands up without major changes anyway. Just wanted to share.

-Zach

Tagged by @chernwei5784 @nekomimiranger, Thanks, loves!

RULES: Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours. When you are done, tag up to 10 people and also tag the person who tagged you… and most importantly, have fun!
A) Age: 18
B) Biggest fears: Hurt someone, take some wrong decision, cockroaches XD
C) Current Time: 01:00 am
D)Drink you last had: Coffee :D
E) Every day starts with: My brother climbing on my bed and jumping on top of me, saying: ‘Hey, Min, wake up wake up, it’s day already!' 
F)Favorite song at the moment: Ahh so many… hmm I think is “Bonjour” (beauty and the beast) aaaand “how far I’ll go” (Moana)
H) Hometown: a very country city XD
I) In love with: my family, my friends ^^ Zootopia XD
J) jealous of: Pfff nah I’m not jealous!…. well, maybe a little …. ok I confess! I’m very jealous XD
K) killed someone: Ahhahah maybe, I’M DANGEROUS muahahaha
L) last time you cried: haha I’m very emotional (and depresive), so I can cry for anything at any time XD
M) Middle name: Just look in my account name
N) siblings: A little cute brother ^^
O) one wish: Travel around the world and meet all the friends I made here on tumblr :D
P) person you last called/texted: @chernwei5784 :)
Q) question you’re always asked: ‘Come on Yasmin, what’s the good and positive side of this?’
R) reason to smile: Make others smile; Wake up every day and see that I have another day of life; See the world not as it is, but as it might be; Help others and so many other reasons!
S) song last sung: ‘Bonjour’-the beauty and the beast’ ( @chernwei5784 don’t say nothing XD)
T) Time you woke up: 6 am 
W) worst habits: worry too much, be perfectionist and stubborn ><
X) X-ray you’ve had: Omg I’ve lost count XD 
Y) your favorite food: I don’t have a favorite, I like food of all kinds (well, I’m a chef ^^)
Z)Zodiac Sign: I don’t believe in signs ;)

I tag: @crispyfactor @nami-things @cloudyloudy @mattnyc816 @ihavewaytoomanyproblems @fox-comics @landsec @andyourteeth @cimar-of-turalis-wildehopps @frithislord

Golden Prince

Title: golden prince

Pairing: Lee Taemin/Reader

Summary: Taemin always lived seen by others, living to the expectations of the king and by the rules of the queen. His curiousness got him closer to what he thought was heaven, but oh, Taemin doesn’t know hell yet.

Chapter I/Chapter II/Chapter III/Chapter IV


Fitted, silky materials surrounded the prince as he looked at himself in the mirror, not completely sure if he’s supposed to hate or love what he sees. His hair was parted slightly in the middle, noticing Kibum behind him as he tries to sow the little parts that were a little unfitting on the skinny prince. Taemin was never one for expensive clothing, different? Absolutely, yes. There was just something thrilling of trying new things and seeing how they looked on him, but it was almost impossible to try so when your clothing was sown and prepared exactly for you by Kim Kibum, the most perfectionist fashion enthusiast you’ll ever meet.

“Straighten your back, for fuck’s sake,” Kibum mumbles, some of his utensils hanging from his mouth as the sewing needle went through the navy clothing he was wearing. Taemin, following Kibum’s instructions, lets out a scoff, but he can’t help but be a little nervous…what was this person his mother was talking about? “You’re exceptionally quiet, today.”

“Am I not like that usually?” Taemin asks, knowing damn well that he was a perfect mixture between talking too much and too little. He was a mystery, per say, he didn’t say anything about himself but he did talk to others; that’s how he lived his whole life. Kibum looks at him from over his shoulder, pulling on Taemin’s sleeves as a pleased smile appears on his face. The suit looked perfect.

“Well,” Kibum says as he places his needle on the little box he had for them, giving Taemin a watch to wear with his suit as he leans back against the little table on Taemin’s wardrobe, or rather…changing room for himself. “You’re one to say something back when I try to tease you, but you haven’t said anything today.”

“Mhm…” Taemin hums as he fixes the watch on his wrist, looking at the time to see that he still had twenty minutes for the meeting he had with his parents. “Just feeling a little bit lost, that’s it.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

"She thinks of me as a perfectionist student who simultaneously tries to hard in class and gets the work done too easily" god sometimes I feel like the whole world feels that way about me. Like, I am "intellectually gifted" (god I hate saying that I'm not bragging I swear) and everything just comes so easily to me, and I feel like its so much harder making friends because of that.Everybody sees me as that unreachable genius without any problems, and at the same time I feel guilty and undeserving

Continued: of my accomplishments. Like, how am I supposed to genuinely support my friend who studied whole year and worked really hard to pass the very important exam and got 50% and I KNOW this exam was extremely hard, much harder than previous years and I didn’t work half as much but I got over 85%, best in school, and I just feel so stupid and guilty and like I am going through life on cheating mode, and others see it too and I can’t blame them, I must be insufferable to be around
————————-
I know exactly where you’re coming from, anon, and it makes me really sad. Here is the truth: things are always going to be harder or easier for some people, and different things will need different people, and people’s strengths come out in different ways. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being smart. There is nothing wrong with having things come easily to you. How can you support your friend’s hard work? She worked really hard and that is a good thing. Your performance on the exam has nothing to do with you–her struggles do not correlate to yours. 

We live in a world that makes women feel deeply guilty for our own accomplishments and intelligence. If you feel like you’re on “cheating mode” it’s because, at heart, you don’t feel like you deserve to be doing well. I get that. I didn’t have to try very hard when I was going through school. Part of that is because they make this standard education for everyone–there are things that will challenge everyone, but what I was being given wasn’t up to my level of challenge. I found that things were much the same in college. And what it meant was that I was always making myself smaller and I was never getting myself to try. To be open about my abilities seemed like it would draw too much attention to me. 

I don’t talk about it here, but my work now is not my first time as a grad student. I went to get an MFA in Creative Writing, and that is where I learned an incredibly important lesson: if you don’t own your own intelligence as a woman, people will try to rob you of it. I had class after class with people that were frankly mediocre who made it their mission to teach me that I wasn’t special and that I wasn’t good at anything. They gave me brutal criticisms that were not shared by anyone who was in class with me. They were unfair. They told me I was stupid. And because I didn’t believe in myself, and because I didn’t think that my intelligence was worth owning, I believed them. I internalized it until I thought I was awful at writing, that I never should have tried, and that I had truly been stupid all along because I never tried, I just parroted things back. I lost my ability to be seen. I lost my ability to be heard.

Was that fair? No, it wasn’t. I didn’t write for three years, which is a long time for someone dedicated enough to get an MFA in writing. But who was the problem? Was it me, or was it mediocre, mostly male and white professors who thought that an assertive and intelligent lesbian woman was a good target for denigration. Men do not want women to be smart. Society does not want women to be smart.

Think of it this way: as an intelligent woman, the last thing that you should do in this world is make yourself small. You have been given a particular type of gift in this world. You have been given an opportunity.

These days, I own the fact that I am an intelligent woman capable of high levels of analysis and interpretation of data. I have an incisive mind. I have a great deal to offer and I am going to do a lot of high level clinical help and hopefully, lead research in areas that matter to me. That isn’t bragging. That is me recognizing my own strengths. It doesn’t hurt others to recognize those things in myself, especially as I am dedicating those strengths to helping others. It doesn’t tear others down to lift yourself up. The world needs smart and professional women. It needs women who know science. It needs women who know art. It needs women who know the law. It needs women who can debate. It needs women who are unabashedly owning the fact that they are smart and they know their field. 

Here is my advice: challenge yourself. Use that intelligence. Look for things that interest you. And then go and be the absolute best. And when you see others are trying their best in their fields and with the things that challenge them, cheer them on just as hard as I am cheering you on right now. 

Don’t be afraid to be a star. Women are taught to be the moon, and reflect light. Trust me, it’s okay to be the light itself. 

aaaaand we have the sibs! They’re twin babs so matching jackets ;P If ya’ll wanna read me rambling about them then clickie the read more~

Keep reading

6

Hello~ May I have a private ship with BTS, SVT, GOT7, NCT-127, EXO, and MONSTA X? I hope it isn’t too much. 😕🙈
I’m a rather introverted person, but become more extroverted over time. I am sensitive and can get offended easily (even though I don’t show it). I like going out, but I’m also a major homebody. I am a perfectionist, even though I tell myself that perfection is unattainable in this world. Many people say that I’m optimistic, but I’m also a conflicted person. I am always the person that listens to my friends, but I need someone that will listen and understand me too. It’s just that I hate burdening people and instead will keep to myself.
Thank you so much in advance. 💜💞

I’m sorry that it took me so long! I hope you enjoy your ships!

In BTS, I ship you with:

Min Yoongi

In SEVENTEEN, I ship you with:

Wen Junhui

In GOT7, I ship you with:

Park Jinyoung

In NCT 127, I ship you with:

Lee Taeyong

In EXO, I ship you with:

Oh Sehun

In Monsta X, I ship you with:

Son Hyunwoo

I hope you liked your ships and had a wonderful day, love!

~Admin Kat

yikes

Poetry is a gate
A gate that opens into a deep, dark void
It can be
Hard
To look that deep
I never want to
I don’t know if I could and still leave
Intact

But something is clawing at my soul
Tearing bloody lines into my heart
And breaking my ribs from the inside out
A rock in the pit of my stomach
A galaxy of things swirling
Through my head and down my cheeks

Who I am
Is not real
I am not who you think I am
I am
Broken

Inside and maybe
Outside too
A little bit
Back in the day
When it hurt so much that the only way
To sooth the beat inside my mind
Was the make that pain something I could control

I am a perfectionist who needs to tear out my delete key
Because it hold me back from speaking what I
Need
To say

I hide and hide and do not seek
Because I do not want to find
Whatever lurks in the dark has teeth

I start to edit in the middle of my sentences and
The words don’t flow
I stop to think and
The thoughts don’t come

What people think of me
Is what determines me
When I care about them
Staring at a dark wall and thinking about all of the
Many
Many
Mistakes

I need my delete key
I can’t spell and I can’t think and I can’t breath
I can’t do much of anything, really

And the demon inside my heart and soul and mind never really left
Only held at bay
Pill after bitter pill
From life
From the bottles
So many bottles
They warn of addiction

I don’t want to be who I was
But did I ever change?
Was I ever someone else?
The sad little mess inside never really went away
Pathetic

When the sun sets
Never let them take the light behind your eyes
A little candle burning bright
Against the night
Night falls

This is a rant
And a search
An attempt to dig out whatever lies dormant inside
Stirring to life once again as I am made to think
Horror draws me because as He says
If you write it maybe it won’t come true
Or maybe I just want to be in their place

Am I ok?
That’s a loaded question.
I think the answer might be no
But I can’t tell
I’ve gotten so used to hiding and hiding and never ever seeking
And not looking into that void
Lock the gate and eat the key
And hope it tears up your throat on the way down

I still cannot find the words I need
Or the words to write
To make this go
Away

Why is it like this

I cannot continue to blink back tears with a laugh
And muffle sobs in my pillow case
Wondering what would happen if I pressed down a little harder
I am supposed to be beyond this
Every week is only biweekly now
I am
Ok

I need to be ok
The parts of life that bite need to be buried
6 feet deep and never
Allowed to see the light of day again
It hurts

No coherent thought or string
I cannot even do this right
The little monster inside
Who is it?

Something tells me that if
I were to split in half
And talk a walk two separate ways
The thing left in the middle would still be
Me

The End has finality.

Good.

nightowlfury  asked:

Black Lion, Voltron, Slav, AND Commander Holt 😎

Slav: Are you a perfectionist? Do you believe in alternate universes?

Yes, I really am a perfectionist for the most part, and I kinda hate that about myself…I hate doing things half-assed usually too, like I put my everything into all work, unless it’s certain assignments for subjects I don’t give a fuck about.

Alternate universes: yes. I firmly believe they exist. There’s just so much out there in the universe that we don’t understand yet, so who’s to say that alternate universes DON’T exist? same as aliens, cryptids- *continues to ramble, seriously I’d be here all day*

Voltron: Are you a team player? Do you prefer to work alone?

Uh, this is debatable. I honestly do prefer to work alone since I can do things the way I want, don’t have to explain my reasoning behind my choices, etc, but I also do work well in teams whenever I do. Heck, I’m part of a few group projects and find working with my partners well. Especially when I find that one partner that just really gets my logic or thought process and makes work easier, ya know?

Black Lion: What are some things you want in Season 3?

I could make this easy and just say more screentime for Lance and Hunk, making Klance canon, *insert other obvious stuff here*, but tbh? Here are a few other things that not very many people mention that I personally want to see:

  • Previous paladins backstories/more altean history: Seriously, what happened to make Zarkon “go to the dark side” and where were/what happened to the previous paladins to get to the point where Alfor had to “runaway”
  • What IS quintessence/more technical info: Basically, I want to know more about the mechanisms in the world. What year are we in? What are the actual “rules” in this world? What makes a Galra a Galra? After all, Haggar is Altean? But she’s also Galra? how does this work. What EXACTLY makes the lions and the castle run? Is quintessence ACTUALLY life force? If so, is my previous theory that the lions are slowly killing the paladins actually true? Please Dreamworks, I need info on this shit
  • Filler episodes: By this I mean I want more of the Space Malls, the Elevator Scenes, the Pidge Studying Sessions, and more Baking with Hunk episodes. I want to see the characters in day to day situations, how they are coping with outer space, and how they play off one another, not even in shipping situations, just, companionship. I want to know more about them, even if I know nothing about their pasts.
  • Coran: This has been something I’ve desperately wanted to know for a while: why/what makes Coran suited as Alfor’s “right hand man”/Allura’s protector? Coran isn’t unintellegent, but we’ve also been given no indication that he is more highly skilled than any other altean would have been? After all, “using the castle” doesn’t appear to be too complex, or else people like Keith and Lance who aren’t viewed as the more technically savvy of the group can still control their “attacking pod thingies” from inside the ship. Sure it’s not of the same level, but if they were given some basic instructions, I have no doubt they could probably control quite a bit on the ship. So what experience or qualities does Coran possess that Alfor trusted him so much?
  • Earth: Lastly, I want to know more about Earth. About what happened on Earth with the Paladins. How and why is the blue lion there. Were there Galra there. Why/What is the Galaxy Garrisons purpose. I’m like 99% sure it’s not fucking space exploration as they said. I don’t trust those shady bastards.

Sorry, this got really long. But yeah. 


Voltron Asks

anonymous asked:

What do you think of Amethyst's new outfit and what do you think the shift to a more gray scale says about where Amethyst's character is going??

SPOILERS BELOW, don’t read if you haven’t watched Reformed!

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.

.

So, I loved the new episode, and as we all know, at the end, Amethyst finally stopped dicking around and came up with an updated form. (Can I just say, what a smooth way to have an excuse to upgrade your character’s outfit when you get bored with it?)

Personally, I think it’s great, but NOT because it shifts into grayscale. As someone who’s drawn amethyst before, I can definitely say - her clothes have always been a grey-blue shade. On all the references, her top (which is now black) was grey-blue. Now it’s just her pants which are light grey. Which I think is just a fashion choice. Not much to do with significance. 

But I think what’s more interesting is what Pearl says. 

“You finally fixed that shoulder strap that’s always bugged me!”

Which I think was a subconscious decision. Am looks down at herself a second later going “bruh, what are you on about?”

But I think that’s important, because she’s making herself look less scrappy. She’s always proud of that - how crazy and uncontrollable she is. But her leggings no longer have rips (too much), just stars. And now her straps aren’t falling off, and they fit more nicely. She’s growing up a little!!

I’m quite happy. Especially because I feel like we got to know regeneration a lot better as a whole, and now we know why Pearl took so damn long (the perfectionist that she is, she probably spent the first week considering her fashion choices and the next trying to perfect the bow). 

How I feel about other friends/signs (Gemini)
  • Aries: funniest bitches on the planet. But when I don't agree with them on something, we end up having a stare down until one of us blinks. Sometimes I wish you could shut up though, I wanna talk too.
  • Taurus: You guys like to outsmart me and many tears come out of my eyes... But you're funny. So I let it slide.
  • Gemini: I don't know. Sometimes I like you... Sometimes I fucking hate your guts... Because you remind me of me, and how annoying I am...
  • Cancer: much sensitive. Let's hit the club to loosen you up. :'D
  • Leo: sTOP TREATING ME LIKE I'M A BABY. I GOT THIS... *later* ...Can you help me?
  • Virgo: I like your perfectionist life... I kinda wanna go to your room and out like a hurricane.
  • Libra: I could hang out with you all day and not have a single dull moment. You are my partner in crime.
  • Scorpio: you're funny, sometimes. You were kinda one of those friends who I can pour out all of my emotions and you wouldn't show judgement. I like you, you're nice, but annoying.
  • Sagittarius: you push all the buttons and sometimes I just wanna murder you.
  • Aquarius: are you a mermaid? I wanna swim with you and see your tail...
  • Pisces: you... Are one sensitive little cutie.
  • I missed Capricorn.
  • Uhh...
  • Capri sun and corn? Hand it over please
Motivation: Am I Still a Writer?

Anonymous asked:

Hi. I’m sorry if this is annoying or if you get this question a lot but I’m in some kind of crisis here??I really don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t write. I’m just drowning in my self-doubts to the point where I’m not comfortable enough to call myself a writer anymore. I’ve been neglecting my stories and poems for months because I just can’t seem to find a way back to them. I realise this might have something to do with my crippling depression that I’ve been struggling with for more than three years now and I don’t expect you to have an answer for how to fix this or how to overcome those thoughts of not being good enough, I just wanted to ask for your opinion: Am I still a writer? Now, I know that I shouldn’t care too much about what to call myself, or about what other people -strangers in this case- think about me. But I do, I can’t help it. I am painfully perfectionistic and I don’t see a point of doing something I love half-heartedly. In the past few years that have been an absolute hell I’ve only been able to write in my journals. Pages upon pages of endless lamentations about life and the universe. I am trying to figure myself out somehow, it’s not that I don’t write, it’s just not how it used to be. There’s just no room for it. I can only write about what I’m going through at the moment. But is this enough to call myself a writer without being a pretentious fool? Because, obviously, that’s the last thing I want to be. 


“Am I still a writer?”

Yes!


If you engage in any kind of creative writing–which includes journaling about your life and experiences–you are a writer regardless of whether or not you share or publish your work.

What is so important for you to keep in mind is that there is no such thing as wasted writing. Even if you spend seven years writing nothing but journal entries or fan-fiction that never sees the light of day, you’re still practicing writing. You’re still gaining writing experience and are growing as a writer. That’s all that matters.

Life can be rough and most of us go through dark periods now and then. It does get better, and if you come out on the other side with all that writing experience, you’ll be that much more advanced when you’re ready to sit down and work on novels again. Plus, working through all of those things you’re going through emotionally–that’s going to help you develop rich, multi-layered characters in the long run. So, whatever you’re going through right now, just know it’s not for nothing. You’re still a writer who is growing every day. Hang in there and keep writing! <3

you made flowers grow in my lungs on ao3.

Zayn loves being alone. It’s his need to get away from things when they get a bit too much that leads him to a cat that he loves way too much for it to not be his, and Liam who makes him feel things that he has never felt before.

featuring eleanor and louis as zayn’s best friends, tiger as zayn’s pet cat that isn’t actually his pet cat, and liam as the wonderful human that he is.

author’s note: inspired by mashallahmangoes‘s love for lonely!zayn talking to animals, this fic (like everything i do)  is for zayniejavadd for being amazing, and fantastic and incredibly supportive of the rampant ranting at 4 am, and forzayniepaynie who’s lovely words made me blush and motivate me to finish it. This fic is honestly like a child to me, and it takes a village to raise one, and without Bushra and Allison this fic would have not come to fruition - so thank you, lovelies. and camilancabello, for being the cutest ball of fluff.

this fic is my baby, i’ve always hoped to write something more than 5k, and today i’ve accomplished this. i’m extremely proud of myself, and i hope you all enjoy reading this as much as i loved writing it.

disclaimer: it’s not beta’ed, and as much of a perfectionist i am, i am just as lazy too. ignore the messiness, if found. also, the manips (black and white pictures aren’t mine, but i couldn’t find the source. if it’s you, please let me know so i can credit you properly.

also, i might add a small sequel if people don’t like the way i hurriedly ended things. 

I am lost in my daydreams. Constantly thinking about how to fulfill my heart and my longings.

It feels like I am wasting too much time. Time with people who actually hurt and destroy me. With being a perfectionist permanently trying to improve myself. I waste too much time with being egocentric and impatient. With arguing and dispute. With being sad and depressive. I am wasting too much time with criticizing myself and wanting to be someone else.

I am wasting too much time instead of being happy. Instead of loving deep and completely out of control. Instead of experiencing adventures and late-night talks. Instead of dancing in the rain. Instead of moving to a big city.

I am wasting too much time instead of living out my daydreams.

anyway so nursey/ransom rom com starts off w nursey dressing up as a nurse for a halloween thing at work and then boy gets injured somehow that he ends up in er and since nursey is that much a perfectionist, like rans doesn’t initially register that nursey. is not a nurse at first bc his costume is dece. and so nursey tries to keep up this facade of ahah yes i too am a medical professional for like, a bit and idk eventually they live together after figuring this all out and also there’s this one long shot where frank ocean plays and they move in slow mo and they kiss 

Christmas Cookie Surprise!

A/N: My FB feed has been blown up with proposals lately, I caught the ridiculous bug and just wanted to write something short and fluffy. Probably dumb but it’s out of my system now. As always, let me know if you don’t want to be tagged. Happy Holidays, y’all!

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