i am the queen of sass

  • Draco: Being attractive is so inconvenient like how am I supposed to do things if I am constantly surrounded by fangirls
  • Hermione: Open your mouth. Your personality will drive them away

“‘I am Sandrilene fa Toren, daughter of Count Mattin fer Toren and his countess, Amiliane fa Landreg. I am the great-niece of his grace, Duke Vedris of this realm of Emelan, and cousin of her Imperial Highness, Empress Berenene of the Namorn Empire. You are Esmelle ei Pragin, daughter of Baron Witten en Pragin and his lady Colledia of House Wheelwright—a merchant house. If I tell you my friend is a lady, then you'—carefully she poured milk into Esmelle’s plate—'you had best start lapping, kitty’” is still probably the most savage thing I’ve ever read, short perhaps of “War, then.”

HOW IT SHOULD HAVE WENT

jack kelly : if things were different

katherine : if you weren’t going to santa fe

jack : and if you weren’t an heiress and if your father wasn’t after my head

katherine : you’re not really scared of my father

jack : no, but i am pretty scared of you

katherine : good

Raspberries || Riverdale Preferences

Archie Andrews:

“Hey buster.” You cooed, sliding into the seat next to him. “What’s going on?” You questioned, peering over his broad shoulder to look at the paper that rested on the table in front of him. “English homework.” He groaned, twiddling with the pen that he held in his large hand. “I’m so stupid. I can’t get anything right.” He whined, slamming his hand down against the desk. “You’re not stupid, silly.” You giggled, reaching up to ruffle his red hair. “Yes I am.” He laughed, opening his embrace so you could fall into it. You obliged quickly, hugging his warm body as close to yours as quickly as you possibly could. “No you’re not.” You giggled once again, pressing your lips to his neck before giving the ginger a rasberry. He pulled away, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion before he began to laugh. “You’re so weird.” Archie chuckled, pulling you towards his chest once again. “But you love me.” You responded, winding your arms around his neck and resting your head on his shoulder. “You bet I do.” He hummed, closing his eyes to savor the moment. He loved these moments, as much as you did. Although savoring them was the best way to go, there would most definitely be more in the future.


Jughead Jones:

“You look so snazzy.” You hummed, clicking the ‘off’ button on your phone. You leaned back onto the plush black couch that was located in FP’s trailer, yawning. “You think?” He questioned you, a crimson red dusting his porcelain cheeks as he turned around in a circle. “Not just snazzy, sexy.” You commented, rubbing your eyes. “Are you tired?” Jughead questioned, falling onto the couch next to you. “Yes, snuggle me.” You whimpered, falling into his open embrace. “Okay baby.” He cooed softly, pressing kisses against your flushed skin. You hummed softly, tangling your fingers in his raven hair. He pulled away a mere 10 seconds later, smiling at your response. “You suck.” You growled, pushing him down so that his back rested against the bottom of the couch. “You suck. And if you’re in the mood, you can suck something else…” He mused, raising an eyebrow. “Nope!” You giggled, trying to get up. That was a struggle, however, as his large hands gripped your waist, and you guessed that he was not going to let go any time soon. His hands crept up, his menacing fingers tickling your sides. You squealed, leaning down to cease his antics. He pressed his lips to your collarbone, blowing a raspberry. You laughed at the fruitful feeling, hugging him quickly. “I love you.”


Betty Cooper:

“Can you do my zipper please?” Betty asked kindly, turning around so you could complete the task. “Of course gorgeous.” You hummed in respnse, grasping the cool metal and dragging upwards. You then adjusted her loose blonde curls, pressing a sweet kiss to the side of her neck. “I love you.” She giggled, turning around to give you a long hug. “You’re adorable.” You giggled, returning the sweet hug. Pulling away, Betty turned to grab her handbook from off her dresser. “Ready to go?” She asked you, cocking her head to side as she waited for a response. “As I’ll ever be.” You responded, blowing out a deep breath that you were not aware that you were holding. “Don’t stress out (Y/N). They already love you. And you’ve had dinner with them before. I don’t know why you’re so nervous now.” Betty cooed, taking your quivering hand in hers. “This is serious Betty. We’re in a fancy restaurant that speaks a different language, which I don’t know a word of, so I don’t know if I’m going to mess up or not.“ You whimpered, closing your eyes for a few seconds. Suddenly, you could feel her lips against your cheek before she gave you raspberry, causing you to yelp and giggle. “There’s that smile. Come on, you’ll be fine. Just show that smile the entire time and they’ll know you’re my world.”


Veronica Lodge:

“Kiss me.” You mused, leaning over your bed, puckering your lips to meet her soft ones. “No.” She giggled, turning away. She continued to scroll through her phone, unfazed by your antics. “Come on, why not?” You whined, your expression going sour. “Because I don’t want to. Was that not obvious?” She wondered, causing your jaw to drop. Who the hell did she think she was? “I’m just kidding, love. Come here.” She giggled, puckering her lipstick-covered lips. You frowned before you quickly kissed her, pulling away before scowling once again. “Come on! It was a joke.” Veronica laughed, turning off her phone before giving you her full attention. “I know.” You held up your brick wall, no matter how hard you were trying not to smile. “Then why are you being so cranky?” She whined, cocking her head to the side. “Because you’re a bitch, that’s why.” You finally gave up your facade, turning to give her a long hug. “There’s my girl.” Veronica grinned, holding you close to her body. Loving her laugh, you lifted up her shirt quickly, giving her a raspberry before pulling her shirt down just as quickly.  “Hey!” She laughed, pulling her shirt down. “Unnessecary!”


Cheryl Blossom:

“Where the hell is she?” You murmured to yourself, your large (e/c) eyes searching the crowded school hallways. Normally it would be easy to spot her unique ginger hair, but today was way too difficult. You turned into a another hallway, growling at your misfortune. “This is ridiculous. Where the hell-” You finally found her, and you grinned happily, elated to have finally spotted Cheryl. “Come here.” You giggled, pulling her into an empty classroom. Breathless for some odd reason, you glanced at her, pulling her into a hug. “What’s going on?” She mumbled, curious. “I missed you.” You whined, shushing her. “Wh-” “Just shut the hell up and hug me back. I haven’t seen you since yesterday.” You sassed, sighing in relief when she wrapped her long arms aroun you. When the two of you pulled away from each other, a look of delight instantly flashed across your face. “Oh! I have a secret for you!” You hummed happily, grinning. “Well then. You have to tell me. I need to be updated on all of this school drama. How else am I supposed to Riverdale High’s Drama Queen?” Cheryl giggled, tossing her red hair over her shoulder. Pressing your lips to ear, you gave her a raspberry. She squirmed away, scowling. “That’s not a secret!” “I know that. I’m just giving you a preview of tonight.”

“Queen of Sass” - Digital Oil Painting

There isn’t actually a flower that means ‘sassy,’ but the orchid comes close. An orchid lays everything out there, it says ‘this is me, this is all of my sassy self, love me.’ So I chose a deep burgundy orchid to represent our queen of sass. ^_^

If you enjoy my art, please consider subscribing to my Patreon! I am saving to buy a wheelchair lift and new battery.

anonymous asked:

100. and 101. with monty pleaseee

Here you go lovely! :)

100. I’m sorry, but that was adorable.

101. You don’t hate me, quit lying to yourself.

It’s 1:30 in the morning and she’s sitting in the passenger seat of Monty’s beaten up jeep. Her head is titled back to look up at the stars that are completely visible due to the lack of a roof over their head, and all she can think when she looks up at the twinkly flecks of hydrogen that decorate the night sky is, ‘Why the fuck am I here?”

What a profound question, right? Why am I here? Why are any of us here? But no, that’s not what she means. What she means is, ‘Why am I driving through the middle of butt fucking Egypt with this guy I only like half the time, in a car that’s inevitably going to take a shit on life at any moment?’

“You’re awfully quiet,” Monty muses, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. He’s drumming his thumbs against the steering wheel with a rhythm that’s actually impressive. She wonders if he plays the drums.

“If only you would be,” she sighs, returning the side glance.

“Nobody forced you to come, so why don’t you roll back the attitude ,” his voice isn’t harsh, but she can tell he’s fed up with her acting like a brat.

“Sweetheart,” she scoffs, “I am the queen of sass.”

“Hey promoted to ‘Sweetheart,” he jokes with a smirk.

“Maybe I just didn’t want to call you something rude,” she quirks an eyebrow, watching his face change expressions.

“Maybe ‘Sweetheart’ is rude,” he challenges.

“It was a little condescending,” she admits.

He snorts, shaking his head while returning his attention completely back to the road that seems to stretch out endlessly in front of them, “You don’t hate me, quit lying to yourself.”

“Who’s lying,” she mutters, looking down at her phone to see that Zach, Justin, and Jessica had arrived at the destination.

Zach had suggested they go rock climbing at a place Tony had told him about, and she’s never been one to turn down an adventure so she agreed. But something about driving through the middle of nowhere by herself in the middle of the night had murder victim vibes written all over it, so when the second text from Zach came through with the bit of information that Monty was going to be there, suddenly douche canoe #1’s company became a lot more appealing.

“Oh shit,” Monty’s eyes widen as a light on the dashboard pops on and the car begins to make extremely unpleasant and concerning grumbling noises.

“Monty,” she panics, sitting up straight in her seat and looking around. There’s nothing for miles.

He pulls the car over to the shoulder of the road, muttering expletives under his breath. Once the car is parked and the engine is off he leaves his spot in the drivers seat to examine what’s going on underneath the hood.

“Montgomery!” she whisper-hisses, not fond that they’re now stranded in the middle of nowhere at 1 something in the morning.

She gets out of the car, hugging her arms around herself as she joins his side. There’s a light smoke coming from the engine, but it doesn’t look like it’s going to burst into flames or anything.

“Yeah, the engine overheated,” he frowns, looking down at his sad little jeep.

“Now what?” she asks, looking around them to make sure they’re still alone. Being stranded during the night has always been a fear of hers. Maybe it’s a bit irrational, but it still freaks her out.

“We wait for the engine to cool down and then I’ll refill the coolant. We should be fine,” he shrugs.

“Great,” she glares at the jeep.

The sudden sound of something vibrating pierces the otherwise silent night, causing her to emit a shriek she’s not too proud of. Instinctively she ducks into Monty’s side, grabbing onto his arm as some sort of protective shield.

Monty lets out a surprised laugh as he reaches into his pocket, pulling out his phone to show her that it was text from Zach that made that noise.

I’m sorry, but that was adorable,” he laughs, rubbing her arm soothingly.

“I am so embarrassing,” she groans, covering her face with her hands. She doesn’t move though. She stays tucked away into Monty’s side as he rubs her arm and back to calm her down. She’d never say it out loud, but she feels safe at his side.

“Never thought I’d see the day where you cowered into anybody’s side. Least of all mine,” he gloats, a stupid smirk twisting his features.

“You’re a dick,” she glowers.

He leans against the headlight of his car, pulling her with him so she’s now resting in-between his legs with her back against his chest and his arms around her midsection. “Maybe, but I’m the dick who’s keeping you safe right now.”

She settles into his chest, feeling his heart beat. He’s right. She’s afraid and he didn’t push her away, he pulled her closer. He could be an arrogant ass sometimes, but she knew he wouldn’t let anything happen to her.

“Thank you,” she turns around in his grasp, standing up on her toes to kiss his cheek. His skin is soft and he smells like a forest. Typical, but not unpleasant.

He moves his one hand to brush the hair out of her face, resting it at the side of her neck to brush a thumb over her cheek. He leans his head down to press a soft kiss to her forehead. It’s sweet in a way she didn’t know Monty could be.

“You’re welcome.“

Skywalkers

Shmi “Queen of the Universe, We Are Not Worthy” Skywalker

Anakin “Ultimate Human Disaster” Skywalker

Padme Naberrie “Though She is Little, She is Fierce” Amidala Skywalker

Obi-Wan “Weaponized Sarcasm” Kenobi

See-Threepio “Team Mom”

Artoo Deetoo “Foul-Mouthed Sass-Bucket”

Ahsoka “My Spirit Animal is the Spider Monkey” Tano

Leia “Looks Like Two Cinnamon Rolls, Will Actually Kill You” Organa

Luke “Looks Like A Cinnamon Roll, Is A Cinnamon Roll, Will Kill You Anyway” Skywalker

Han “Dweeby Schoolboy in Love Actual Cinnamon Roll” Solo

Chewbacca “I Am A Real Adult How Did I End Up A Glorified Babysitter?”


Part Two!

anonymous asked:

CAITRIONA IS THE MF QUEEN AND SAM IS FINALLY STANDING UP FOR HIMSELF AND HIS CREW AND I AM SO PROUD OF HIM. I BET THEY'RE WRITING THEIR TWEETS WHILE THE OTHER READS OVER AND IS LIKE ''OH YEAH GOOD ONE BABE'' WHILE THEY LIE IN BED TOGETHER AND SASS THE F OUT OF LYNETTE. THIS IS THE SAMCAIT I LOVE! I AM SO HERE FOR THIS! whoa sorry for the slightly angsty caps, Jess, I'm just so happy! 🎉🎉🎉

I’M JUST

Fanfiction Recommendation

9/17/17: Hey guys! So I know that I know that I’m about 10 minutes late on posting this, but tonight was my first rehearsal for A Chorus Line here at Texas State. I am the Wardrobe Supervisor for the show which means that I am in charge of all of the show’s costumes and the quick changes that happen throughout. So yeah, lots of paperwork and coordinating of things, it’s taking up a lot of my time. But I just got back from rehearsal, which is why this is kind of late. I am absolutely going to try my hardest to post again this week, they’re are a couple of things I would like to post actually, but I’m not sure when it will happen between class and rehearsals and work. But I’m going to try really hard. I love you and Enjoy!

Last Week’s Recommendation 

My Masterlist 

Dean x Reader

  • Beyond Good by @soaringeag1e - No Summary, Saying goodbye to Dean can get pretty hard
  • Lucky Me by @sis-tafics -  Dean accidentally spills how he feels and decides to deal with it one of the only ways he knows how. Written from Dean’s POV

Sam x Reader

Cas x Reader

  • The Green Eyed Angel by @narisjournal-blog - “Hey, I’ve told you but your writing is awesome. I have a request for you. Could you, please, write a fic with jealous!Cas because you’re behave differently with Dean. x”
  • The More You Know by @mrspadalackles - Prompts:  “I can’t look into the street without everything changing.” and “The closer I get to feeling, the further that I am feeling from alright.”

Crowley x Reader

Jensen x Reader

  • Haircuts and Wedding Plans by @pie-not-cake-you-assbutt - You’re busy getting your sister’s wedding organized, spending time with your kid, Indiana, and trying to figure out getting a date for the wedding, when you take Indie to get a haircut and meet Jensen.
  • The Roles We Play by @wonderfulworldofwinchester - “Hey I love your writing and I wanted to ask if you also write fics about the actors? If so can I request some Jensen x Reader based on the Con they were in Rome recently where Jensen was so cute and drunk. the reader is a actor on the show and plays a love interest for dean and the fans also ship them both in real life. (let’s pretend Danneel doesn’t exist or is happy with someone else). Keep up the great work honey!! “

Jared x Reader

  • Banana Pancakes by @jayankles - Jared decides it’s time that you, he and your daughter should have a day off.
  • Asphalt Saviors by @oneshoeshort -  Jared Padalecki is a successful actor with millions of fans around the world. But as an unmarried 35 year old bachelor, he wishes he could share his success with someone special. He truly believes he’ll be single forever, until he witnesses a robbery in progress.

Misha x Reader

Bucky x Reader

Sebastian Stan x Reader

Teen Wolf 6x09 spoilers

So instead of doing small posts throughout, i’m gonna do one giant post concerning this episode, so lets get to it.

• #MaliaTheOptimist

• Omg we’re doing the cold remembery thingy we did with Isaac bb

• Sheriff, you don’t have a station full of armed deputies to back u up. srys.

• poor bbs so sed Sheriff nooo

• dont. shoot. theo. (pls)

• “I’m an Atheist, fire at will.” I just got chills idk why someone help me now i’m turned on.

• what is going on theo what OMG YES STILES WAS SMART WOW SHE GREAT SO RIGHT I CANT BELIEVE I LOVE THEO RAEKEN

•in this moment, i remember what theo trash i am :)

• WTF SHERIFF BBY PLS NO HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

•"theres a lot of keys here!“ "I’m beginning to feel like you’re not even trying here!” Omg

•theo just ran over a ghost rider what a cutiepie

• yay shirtless scott

• #momLydia

• SCYDIA FRIENDSHIP FEELS

•werewolf freezee pop

• Scott Mccall is such a beautiful being

• ALPHA EYES

• Lydia, i can hear you.

• HE IS REMEMBERING SEASON ONE OMG BABYCAKES

• BUZZCUT STILES

•i love this song

• awe Baby Beta Scott

• i love Theo omg yall i am trash

• STILES YOU ARE NOT ROBIN I PROMISE ILY

• “cause you trust everyone” this moment broke my heart

• Scott sweetie pls

• Liam you darling baby too sweet

• Theo you ass why do i love you

• OH SHIT SISSY GONNA KICK YR ASS THEO oh es a memory OK NOW I REMEMBER WHY I LOVE YOU YOU POOR SWEET HURT SOUL

• Ha shittttttttt yall in trouble

• Lost Lydia hurts my heart she is my queen

• ok now shes not lost she is a smart gg babygirl

• YAS LYDIA YOU SWEET SMART PRINCESS I LOVE YOU

• Scott you got this pupper

• open the locker do it do it do it

• this is only half the episode yall must hate me omfg

• “lets play dead like good pups” basically what Liam just said

• QUIT ARGUING OMGEE THEO JUST QUIT BEING PROBLEMATIC YOU TOTAL ASS

•oh shit Liam steppin up..unexpected

•Omg he is remembering the phone call

• YES STILES I DO MISS YOU

• Lydia support yo Alpha

• i wonder which memory is gonna trigger it

• LIKE AN EMOTIONAL CONNECTION LIKE AN EMOTIONAL TETHER

• BROTHERS

• IS IT THAT ONE IS THAT IT IS IT THAT MEMORY YES IT IS

•IM CRYING SO HARD

•SCOTT YOURE MY BEST FRIEND SCOTT YOURE MY BROTHER

• I cant see thru my tears

• this episode is an emotional rollercoaster

• lydia is so pretty

• BABY HIS HANDS ARE SHAKING

• Malia my queen yes IM A HARDCORE STYDIA SHIPPER BUT I AM READY FOR THIS

• Omg so long ago so eichen so far back

• my heart my heart malia pls THE HALE VAULT my sweet sweet children babycakes

• MALIA PLS OPEN YOUR EYES NO PLS

•MALIA YOU DID IT

•MALIA DONT FREEZE YALL BETTER GET HER OUT

• yas #teamwork from my fave and my least fave (no offense i just don’t like Liam)

•Scalia sweet moment yes

•they have so much hope

• omg im sorry malia shes so sad BUT STYDIA YES YES YES

•woah YAS THEO KICK ASS YAS THEO GIVE SASS

•ok liam is an honorable werepuppy and i’m liking him more every second

• THEO U BETTER HOP ON THAT WAGON AND START KICKIN SOME ASS B4 U GO

•THEOS EYES ARE AMAZING

•"you smoked when you were ten?“ "No just bit my fingernails”

• Malia reading is so cute

• Scott reading is so relaxing THIS IS HYPNOSIS WHY AM I TURNED ON

• Omg is she gonna watch their memories YES SHE IS girl now u see how we felt

• THE DANCE AWE

• if Stiles doesnt come back in the end of all this imma sue Jeff Davis for emotional trauma

•YAS THEO

•NO THEO

• as you can tell… i, a theo girl, am very conflicted in this episode.

• *goes to fist bump like cuties* *yeah no*

•THEO I LOVE U BABYCAKES OMFG HE SAVED LIAM I CANT RN I CANT IM SCREAMING CHARACTER REDEMPTION OMFG

•REMEMBER I LOVE YOU SHE REMEMBERS SHE REMEMBERS THE KISS YALL

•real tears yall I had to pause it i’m crying so hard

•they played the song

•WHEN SHE REALIZED SHE LOVED HIM THATS WHEN IT HAPPENED

• shes crying babygirl please dont cry just remember him and be happy and love him and take care of him

•BUT YOU CAN SAY IT BACK

•if this aint stiles imma fight Jeff

•Plsplsplsplsplsplsplspls Please be stiles

• ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

•OK PROMO MADE IT BETTER

ok and with that, my emotionally unstable ass is gonna go cry. Thank you and goodnight folks!

anonymous asked:

Helloo! May I have a scenario where Tsukishima is telling his s/o who is a third year to stop coming to see him during class breaks because she gets too much attention and it makes him jealous if that makes sense? I love your blog btw!!!!

It’s been a while since I’ve written Tsukishima (so I hope I got it right), but it was still a lot of fun. Always fun to write the sass-queen. :D Enjoy!


“But Kei,” her gentle voice so firm that it surprises him a little, “how else am I going to get your lunches to you?”

“You don’t have to,” Tsukishima protests rather feebly, “you’re not my mother, you don’t have to keep on making those for me every day.”

“But you like them, don’t you?”

She looks so incredibly earnest as she asks that Tsukishima, ice-prince extravaganza, has to do a double take and reconsider his reply. The rotten truth is, he does like them. They’re the best thing he’s ever tasted, and he’s a firm advocate for her pursuing a culinary career after high school. His mom wasn’t particularly happy to hear that her cooking had been put in second place, but there’s never saying no to her son for her.

Very much like his situation right now, interestingly. His girlfriend always had a tough streak that props her core up no matter how soft and kind she’s to everyone (to his chagrin). Many a time has Tsukishima been told that he doesn’t deserve her, she’s just too nice for an asshole like him, and he rather has to agree.

“Kei?”

“Oh,” he fumbles, ‘cus shit, he doesn’t want to stop eating her lunches but- “it’s just- is there another way?”

“Are you asking me to set up a smuggling ring just to send you your lunches without me showing up at your classroom?”

“Could you?”

Keep reading

Diva is my name and diva is my game. What can I say? I mean, how can anyone not be a fan of THIS beautiful butt?

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to be around my person. NOT a fan of other cats…let’s be clear here, I am the best. All those other kitties are so below my level.

You’d better be savvy cuz I’ll bring the sass. If you make me the queen of your catstle, I’ll look at you like you’re the only star in my sky.

I’m searching for a long term relationship with a warm lap and someone who will appreciate the love I have to give and make me their one and only. Take me home!

Diva’s deets: 5 years old. At Give Me Shelter Cat Rescue   in San Francisco. info@givemesheltersf.org

and you drive me wild

(Click here to read the previous chapters!)

PART SIX: Let’s make your outfit look hot

“Laf?” Alex called from his bedroom. He was standing in front of his bed, six different outfits spread out in front of him.

“Oui, mon ami?” Lafayette poked his head into Alex’s room. He had little green spots all over his face–– a face mask to treat his nonexistent acne.

“I can’t decide on what to wear,” Alex whined.

“Mon ami, seriously?” Laf asked, picking up the suit Alexander wore to all of the Washington’s uber formal events.

Alex gave a nervous laugh and shrugged. “I… wanted to make a good first impression?”

Laf shoved the suit at Alex for him to hang back up in the closet. While Alex was doing so, Laf had rejected three more potential outfits.

Alex went to gather them up when Laf stopped him.

“I must tell you why not to wear these for this kind of moment or you will never learn,” he said. He cleared his throat as he picked up the first outfit, a faded t-shirt for an obscure band and torn jeans. “This is not at all you,” Laf said. “Wasn’t this a Halloween costume?”

Alex blushed. “But what if he likes the whole grunge thing?”

Lafayette tsked. “Mon ami, do not lie about who you are or what you like to get a boy or girl or anyone. Ever. It is not worth it.”

With that, he picked up the next outfit, a bright blue polo shirt and khakis. “Alexander, mon ami,” Laf said, cocking an eyebrow at his brother. “What the, how you say, fuck?”

“Remember my job at the snack shack on the golf course last summer?”

“You were going to wear your work uniform?” Lafayette exclaimed. “I do not believe I even have to explain why you should never do that.” He shoved the clothes into Alex’s arms.

“I was trying to look professional!” Alex said.

“Professionally bad a fashion,” Laf muttered.

Alex glared at him, but stayed silent. Lafayette was just trying to help, after all, even if he was being the ultimate sass queen about it.

“And this little number,” Laf said, holding up the final outfit. It consisted of tight black pants and a purple sequins top. “This was from a talent show performance. From eighth grade. Do you even fit it anymore?”

“Fuck off,” Alex muttered, swiping the outfit out of Laf’s hands.

“Were you going to wear the hat, too, and bring your wand?”

“LAF I SWEAR––”

“Ah, I am only teasing, mon ami,” Laf said with a wink.

Alexander crossed his arms and huffed at his brother.

“Now, let us look at the final two outfits.”

All that was left were two pairs of dark blue jeans, a collared flannel shirt, and a dark green cable knit sweater.

“The sweater,” Laf said confidently. “It goes well with your skin and brings out your eyes.”

Alexander studied the sweater. “And which pair of jeans?”

Laf looked at each pair before turning to Alex in confusion. “They are the same, non?”

“One has more of a distressed look than the other,” Alex said as if it should have been obvious.

“And are you distressed, mon ami?” Laf said, his tone light.

“Always,” Alex mumbled, rolling his eyes.

“Then the more distressed ones it is!” Laf turned to leave the room, but stopped short of the doorway. “And when you are done, mon ami, come to my room. I will fix your hair.”

“But my hair is fine, L––”

“I will fix it,” Laf said again.

Alex knew it was useless to argue. “Fine,” he said with a sigh.

“Magnifique,” Lafayette said with a grin. “Let us prepare for game night!”

10

I have a “mean” hedgehog. Marvel is known for her funny faces on Instagram, and for always being in a ball, but no one knows that every day is a struggle with this girl. She is six months old (on the 2nd of June), is quilling and HATES being touched. While Marvel makes adorable faces, I often hold her with quills digging into my hand. Now, that is NOT to say I don’t love her. I have accepted that this is just who Marvel is. She is not the sweet young hedgehog she used to be, and I am fine with that. Because of a mix up where I got her, there was a risk that she would be pregnant. As a result, I was allowed to hold her every day, which is what you are supposed to do with hedgehogs. You are basically supposed to manhandle them every day, for at least an hour a day. Once that 60dpc came up, I made sure to hold her daily, and attempt treats, give belly rubs, etc. She’s just… a grump. And I’ve accepted that. But what most people don’t know is that while I do take ADORABLE photos of the grumpy queen, I am hissed at, stabbed, and even bitten on a regular basis. To some people, they would be turned off by this. They would likely have sold her or continued to neglect her. This is why I am SO glad that I am the one who adopted her, because I love her regardless of this “flaw”. I will continue to hold her every day, play outside with her, be stabbed by her, bitten by her, etc. Because I love the little sass pot that she is. Please note that if a hedgehog is not held on a regular basis, nor given the care they deserve, they are likely to become this way. They will get used to not being touched, and will actually become extremely defensive. So… HOLD YOUR HEDGEHOG EVERY DAY. NO MATTER HOW GRUMPY THEY ARE.

The Best Parts of Elena and the Secret of Avalor

For once, me being behind on these posts worked out in my favor, as I’m able to reinstate this special into it’s rightful place in the Sofia the First episode timeline.

-

Amber: We’ll have tea when I get back, Hildy.  Have your steward write my steward.

-

The Lost Princess of Avalor

-

Alacazar: Well, this book was made by a powerful wizard.
Sofia: Who?
Alacazar: Me!

Alacazar: It is a long story… which I am about to tell you.

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Alacazar: When Shuriki tried to strike her down, the amulet made Elena more powerful than she could possibly imagine by pulling her inside it.

I’m sorry, but that’s what I think of every single time.

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The weird quick cuts on the royal family during The Great Unknown:

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You know Amber’s crazy hair will always get a mention.

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New outfit!

Looking good, Roland.

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Esteban!

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Shuriki: Can’t you see I’m putting on my best face for our visitors?
Esteban: Oh, should I come back when you are finished?
Shuriki: I am finished.
Esteban: Of course you are, my queen.  My mistake.

From his very first moment onscreen, Esteban is dripping with sass.

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Esteban’s face when Shuriki talks about there not being any noise from bells or music.

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Shuriki’s “best face”

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Amber wearing the dress from the wedding (as seen in Mom’s the Word)

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Miranda’s wearing a slightly recolored version of her wedding dress as well.

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Shuriki: Yes, your beloved queen has arrived.  Cheer like you mean it!

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Sofia: What if I told you I know a way to bring Princess Elena back?
Skylar: You better not be toying with me, little girl, because I am highly emotional and extremely gullible!

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Mateo is too cute!

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I like the way Zuzo’s ears flop, even if he himself comes across as trying too hard to be irreverent.

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Armando’s puppet show:

“But really she was a wicked witch who had taken over the jungle!”

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Sofia: Is there some kind of law against dancing?
Roland: Sofia, no one would pass a law against dancing.  That’s like passing a law against fun!

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Esteban is so happy to play the guitar.

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The Sambarosa

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When Shuriki takes the guitar and says, “We can dispose of that now,” you just know she means dispose of it literally.  How many guitars has Esteban had to go through during her reign, I wonder?

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The twins differing reactions to Sofia obviously being up to something but not telling them what it is. (Personally, I’m with Amber)

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Mateo, after seeing Sofia turn into a mermaid: I wish I could shapeshift that easily.

Wait, does that mean Mateo has tried shapeshifting before?  Will this come up in the series proper?

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Elena emerging from the amulet

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Elena: (to Shuriki) The time has come to pay for your crimes!
Roland: Crimes?  What crimes?

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Reactions to hearing Shuriki is a usurper.

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You have to feel bad for Roland and Miranda.  They just wanted a nice vacation and to make a new trade partner.  Instead they get thrown into the middle of this plot with no warning.

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Shuriki: And speaking of family, you haven’t said hello to your cousin Esteban.
Esteban: *nervous stammer*

His expressions in this whole scene, though.  So downtrodden, so conflicted.

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The way Shuriki says, “Lock them up while you’re at it.” Her delivery has a “this guy, am I right?” vibe to it.

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Roland: You’ll regret this!
Shuriki: I doubt it.

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“You are brave, Princess, but your battle strategy, not so good.”

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Sofia: Oh, I hope they’re okay.
(cut to a jail cell)
Miranda: This is not okay, Roland.

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The scene between Esteban and Armando.

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Elena telling Sofia about the last time she saw her sister.

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Mateo’s mom knowing about him practicing magic.

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Elena: You know, all this time I was stuck in the amulet, I thought I was alone.  But you’re right, Sofia, it doesn’t have to be that way.  I have all of you.
Skylar: Yeah, but what good are we against Shuriki and all her soldiers?
Elena: ….I’m still figuring that out.

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Elena: Hey there.  You look like a nice guy who just wants to do the right thing.  *gives him the puppydog eyes*
Armando: I do?  I mean, I do!

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The callback to The Amulet of Avalor

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Miranda: Sofia, you still should have told us what was going on.
Sofia: I know.  I just wanted to keep you all out of trouble.
Amber: Well, it’s too late for that.

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Learning that what I considered the least likely theory for why Esteban was the only member of Elena’s family not magically time capsuled was actually the right one.

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Fransisco: Since when do people ride jacquins?
Migs: Don’t get used to it.

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Sofia: I’m going to stay and help Elena.
Amber: What?  If I knew that, I would have gotten on another bird-thingy.

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Sofia: Everyone’s coming.
Roland: What do you mean, “everyone”?
Sofia: EVERYONE!!!

(with apologies to The Professional)

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Soldier: They’re coming, your majesty.
Shuriki: Who’s coming?
Soldier: All of Avalor!

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The All Avalor reprise of “My Time.”

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Elena: They locked the gate!  We’ll have to break it down.
Sofia: Or we can fly around the other side and open it.
Elena: That’ll work, too.

Skylar was right, your strategy really does stink, Elena.

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Action Roland

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Elena: And you can’t stop all of us.
Shuriki: I don’t have to.  I only have to stop you!

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Esteban grabbing the wand from Shuriki

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Esteban proclaiming Elena “the rightful heir.”

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Elena: Thank you, cousin.  For a moment, I wasn’t sure whose side you were on.
Esteban: I was always on our side.

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Shuriki not being dead just yet.

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Esteban raising the flag!

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And so we finally knew who to blame for this dress.  If Alacazar was going to give her a new outfit, couldn’t it have at least resembled the dress she wore in Avalor?  I rather liked that one.