i am sooooo proud of myself

A Dangerous Game (Suho Mafia!au fic) Chapter 17 - His Kitten (M)

Warnings: smut, slight daddy kink 

Ch. 1, Ch. 2, Ch. 3, Ch. 4, Ch. 5, Ch. 6, Ch. 7, Ch. 8, Ch. 9, Ch. 10, Ch. 11, Ch. 12, Ch. 13, Ch. 14, Ch. 15(M), Ch. 16Ch. 17(M), Ch. 18Ch. 19, Ch. 20, Ch. 21, Ch. 22, Bonus Chapter


~Junmyeon~

“We know where he lives and we’re ready to go grab him as soon as you give the go ahead,” Minseok said, sitting across from him. Junmyeon’s back was to him as he sat staring out his office window, and though he couldn’t see his face, Minseok knew exactly what was on his mind. “We met, what…ten years ago? And in all that time that I’ve known you no chick has ever gotten into your head.”

“I fell in love…” Junmyeon finally said, “It’s the worse thing that could have happened.”

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:)

sleep over; peter parker

pairing: peter parker x stark!reader
word count: 937 (I changed some things so it’s probably at a 1000 right now)
warnings: none, just fluff
summary: you ask your dad, tony stark, if your boyfriend, peter parker, can stay the night. but your dad doesn’t know that you guys are together. 
my other work

Originally posted by waywarddaughter


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I am sooooo proud of myself because I taught myself how to recolor toddler beds! (((Happy Dance)))

I tried to find a tutorial on how to recolor beds in TS4 and I couldn’t but I FINALLY figured it out today. These are the 5 that I created :) Just wanted to share my good news for the day. 

Nya~ Nya~ !
Hi everyone ! I’m back ! So, how are you ?
I am super, very, truly, sincerely sorry for haven’t been here a lot…

So to be forgiven(?) I drew my friends Lisa, Myself, Kitty and Gaby in little Chibis Cats !
Just look at them ! They are sooooo cute ! 💛
Again, I’m pretty proud of the background (Because I fail it a lot 😓)

So I hope you like it and sorry again !

Art by : @lena86300 (Me)
For : @lisagamer4561 ( The Coolest ) 💜
@abrokenkitty ( The Nicest ) 💙
@silversans098 ( The Kindest ) 💛
And I am the stupid one ! Lol

Love you all 💗

I was tagged by @illidria <3

If you get this, you have to say 5 random things about yourself, then tag 10 other people

1. I love cold rainy days. They literally keep me alive

2. I refuse to look at myself in mirrors and seldomly take pictures of myself.

3. I listen to music really loud and my ears hate me.

4. I can’t express how much I love making someone else happy.

5. I am really proud of my progress art wise.I know this sounds suuper conceided but I found my doodles from when I was JUST starting to draw. I would hide these doods because I was sooooo ashamed of them…but now I just….I’m proud of how hard I have worked to get to where I am. 

I don’t know many people on here so I tag @queenxolivier @kotori-miu @pahndah @rebbi-sonnenhell @inkuisitivskins . No pressure guys!

Happy Tenth Anniversary Hetalia!

Still not used to animation, sooo. Have a Japan!
Hetalia is truly a wonderful Anime/Manga/comic that made numerous people like History and want to travel around the world.
I am just like them.
Ze Best if you ask me.

A year ago today.

A year ago today, i realized that i was too sad to even function. It wasn’t a new thing for me cause i know how sad i am all the time and i just don’t have anybody to talk about it with. If i try to talk to my parents, i’d only be a white noise to them cause i know how much problems they’re dealing at that moment and i really don’t have the balls to open up to them at the age of 16 thinking that they’d somehow listen. So four-months before i turn 17, i asked my parents to send me off to Washington, did i tell them why? No. But i let them think that i’m going because i wanna brag to people that i can go to some place without even trying, but that wasn’t the case. I was too sad, and i was hurting myself, leaving marks that i know i shouldn’t, addicted to the feeling of maybe that if people won’t listen, this is the only thing that works for me. And i was tired, i know i had to do something about it, i don’t wanna be sad all the time when i have all the things i can be grateful for. But i didn’t do that, i wasn’t thankful for what i have when i should, i hated everything, and i become so bitter to and about everything that i know i had to go and fix it myself. 

So, they did, they spend half of their savings to send me away to Washington. I still didn’t tell them why when i guess i should just tell them whether they’re going to listen or not. 

As i was standing in the cold morning of October in SeaTac airport waiting for my aunt’s husband to pick me up, i look around, there’s a part of me that’s screaming in joy that i’m finally here and not afraid to tell myself that i need to get back to who i was again, but the other part was just sad, scared, anxious, and mostly angry because i left my family in such a bad situation just because i was unhappy when i know that they feel the same way as i do. Unhappy. 

Should i tell them? Should i just go home and let this trip be a waste? Maybe i should just tell them on the phone tonight. Shit, i can’t, i don’t want them to think that i’m weird again. 

So, i didn’t. I kept it to myself as the days went by and i was getting better by changing my bad habits to a good new ones. I was healthier, i stopped hurting myself, i was just a bundle of 30% happiness and 70% sad. Hella sad. 

2 months down, i was getting better and better, i accept myself day by day, i was much happier, and it was like i don’t have time to be sad unless my mom told me what’s going on in the house that points out the fact that i couldn’t help and then I’d lock myself up in my room and think that i shouldn’t be here in the first place, but a part of me was happy that i work on myself even though i couldn’t seem to get everything right. 

But i was so excited for myself because when i know i couldn’t get the help i needed, i push myself to get back on my feet even though it wasn’t easy. 

I’d walk every morning for an hour or two outside before everyone else was awake, i’d stop by and buy myself a breakfast and a cup of coffee and sit at the park that’s two-miles away from the house and then go home finding my 4-years old cousin watching wallykazam. My aunt sitting right on the couch with her phone on her 8-months pregnant belly along with her cup of coffee next to her. 

I guess i could say my life was great in there. I learn so much from being away because the people around me was amazing, i learn to accept myself more, i started to love myself with every flaws that i got, everything was fine. 

And then i met a boy. 

Oh god, a boy?

Yes, a boy! 

The boy who ended up being my first kiss, and the person who ended up being person i look up to with all the crazy things that’s happening around me. I guess even things doesn’t quite work out, i was glad that somehow he was there, he was almost like the person i talk to every day, and i needed that, i needed someone to tell me that it was okay to be sad, and i have him trying to make me laugh every time i was sad even though he didn’t know what was going on. I needed someone to tell me that they love me sometimes. And he did, for a little while. 

On and on about the boy, heartbreak, and myself, things at home didn’t seem to get better and i was back at being sad. I was so tacky of the feeling of my first feeling of liking someone, and heartbreak, and just overwhelmed by all of the things that’s happening that i start to push people away. Again. 

Do i wanna see the boy? Will i cry if i don’t see him because i know that he’s probably avoiding me? OOOOH SO TACKY. I was just full of crap being so tacky of the feelings of liking someone, because clearly, now you know that i never been with someone before, and that i never experienced someone liking me until the boy happened. 

Oh i don’t wanna be sad again! 

But i was back to who i was before i got there. 

A sad human. 

I’m sad again and he was one of the reason why, but mostly home. Because as things gets worse with me and my tacky puppy love life, things at home were a mess and i still have no intention to go home and be there. 

What am i? 

Selfish. 

And my routine from waking up, working out, eating healthy breakfast, hopping into the shower, doing my makeup and putting cute clothes to wear to make me feel good about myself was gone. 

It’s from that to, waking up, staying in bed till 12, eat, go back up to my room and go back to sleep until seven at night. I wouldn’t wanna try to spend time with my cousin, and i feel bad. Again. I’d cry about so many things every night, i wouldn’t talk to my friends, i wouldn’t tell them what was going on until i decided to go out a day before my birthday to meet Destiny. 

And i was still hoping for the boy to at least be excited because i’ll be turning 17 in less than 4 hours. But he didn’t and i feel like shit but again, i’ve been feeling like shit for the past month and i have two-more months before i go back home, thinking that maybe this trip will be a waste. 

It was amazing. 

I spend my last day being 16 feeling happy, talking about shit i care about, and things that went wrong, and it’s nice to finally see someone and talk to them because i know they’d do nothing but to listen to what i had to say. It doesn’t happen very often but i was happy, and it was raining that night. When the night was over, i decided to walk home in the rain. 

I was excited to be 17 in two hours. So when i got home, everyone was asleep, i stayed in until 12 to FaceTime my parents and also with my aunt who were staying at our house with her family. I cried. Meh, emotional little duck. Told them i was ready to go home when the fact was, nope, i don’t ever wanna leave this place. But my mom tells me she can’t wait to see me, everyone said it except for my brother because he was nowhere to be found. Shaking muh head. But it was nice to see my people to be excited to see me again. I guess. 

And just when things were getting better again, my best friend left for the millionth times, for a boy she’s been dating since she was 12. I was in my meh stage again, and it feels like when something good happens, the bad ones barged in and tells me, “whoops, just kidding, ain’t gon let ya be happy.” 

But 6-weeks before March comes, Destiny decided to send me a ticket to visit her in SoCal. And without thinking about anything, i said yes, and it was before i talk to my aunt about it, so i guess, i was waiting for Destiny to tell me she bought the ticket just so when i talk to my aunt and mom, they couldn’t say no. SMART MOVE? More like i was trying to get killed. 

I spend 11-days, figuring myself out, loving every inch of body and be happy as my spend my time in SoCal and also because of the help of my surroundings. The last three-days before i go home, i was happy, it was more like i was a different person. The better person than before, and i couldn’t be more happy of how the trip have changed my life completely. 

I learned that i don’t have to try and fix something i can’t, because sometimes it’s meant to be that way. I also learn that it’s riskier to not take a risk because at that time, i was too busy thinking of what others might think of me instead of taking a risk for myself to be with someone i can be happy with at that time, even though i know somehow it’s still not gonna work, but i should just try it and experience it myself. And i learn that it’s sooooo okay to be sad and not be okay, because it’s normal to be sad, it’s a part of being human, we feel, we let the feelings come and go. 

I still don’t know why i’m writing this, but i have nothing to lose, telling all my people in here that i’m okay now and i have never love myself more, i have never been happier, and that i have come so far to be the person that i am today even if this post doesn’t seem to inspire people. 

But i, myself, inspire me. 

I have never been so proud of myself that i stopped hurting myself in a way that people think i did it because they feel the need to think that i think it was cool to leave marks on myself. But my life never depends on anybody but myself, and i am happy to say that i am incredibly the happiest. Even when i’m sad, i always find a way to make myself a little bit more happier. 

You have the rights to make yourself feel more about life, to be selfish sometimes, to let people know that you’re not okay, and its okay if you choose to not explain yourself, because you don’t ever have the need to explain yourself to anybody. 

So, if you ever feel like you’re giving up on yourself, just remember, a year from now, or even a week from now, you’re making progress for yourself, you’re doing yourself a favor by knowing that you’re one of God’s greatest, finest creature he ever made whether you believe in God or not. 

So even though this is a bit too personal. I hope this does something to you and that this post reminds you that it’s okay to not be okay but to know that you can always change your ways to the better. 

All my love, 

Naomi xx

3

hii! my name is simran. i’m half white and half indo-fijian. when i was younger, i didn’t see myself as one race or the other. i was both. i spoke both hindi and english because my dad is white and my mom is brown. i watched both hindi and english tv shows. i identified with both sides of me. it wasn’t a big deal.

when I started going to school, things kind of changed. i don’t really know how to explain it but i just felt kind of out of place. i thankfully was never bullied for my race, expect for the fact that people from school sometimes “joked around” and called me “cinnamon” because i guess it kind of sounds like “simran”??? i started hating my name because of this. it wasn’t “white enough”.my sisters and i are the only ones in our entire family that are biracial. my mom’s side of the family always “jokingly” makes fun of my sisters and i because we’re half white. and are “surprised” and we can actually understand hindi and stuff.

i guess a mix of the what happened at school, and being “too white” or “not indian enough” for my mom’s side of the family, i started to distance myself from being indo-fijian. when i was outside of the house, i was white. i didn’t want to be associated with being mixed or being indo-fijian. any time we had to wear indian suits to a wedding or some other family occasion, i would quickly get in and out of the car because i felt embarrassed to be seen in those clothes in public. i was so scared that someone from school would see me wearing these clothes.

i started noticing differences between me and some of the other girls. i have really thick and frizzy hair which i started hating, so i always tied my hair up. my arms and legs were a lot hairy than the other girls. my eyebrows were thicker, i had facial hair in places they didn’t have. i started hating the way i looked, and honestly, i’m still struggling with all of this. i haven’t kept my hair down in public in probably over 10 years. i always wear hoodies to cover my arms, and if i do wear something short sleeved, i find myself always crossing my arms to try and hide it.

sometimes it’s hard to relate to a lot of people, because i am mixed. my struggle isn’t only with being brown, it is being biracial, so someone else i really really want to thank for encouraging me to be proud with who i am is zayn malik. he is also half white and half brown (although he is pakistani) and has talked about how he has struggled with being mixed. he’s spoken about having trouble fitting in because of his mixed heritage, but i can completely relate to. i wasn’t ever “white enough” for school, or “brown enough” for my mom’s family, so i have no idea who i am, or where i’m supposed to be. on friday, zayn attended the asian awards, and during his acceptance speech, he said something that stood out to me, and made me really happy. he said “i’d like to thank my mum and dad for making me asian”. despite having trouble fitting in as a kid, being half white, and facing racism throughout his career, he is thankful for being asian. he still identifies and is proud to be asian. idk how to explain how i feel but im just so so sooo happy that there is a famous brown person out there for me to look up to. and the fact that he is half white and half brown, just like i am, makes me even happier. he knows the struggle of not fitting in because of being mixed, but he is still proud of his heritage. so thank you sooooo much zayn, you really mean a lot to me, i love you ♥  :’)

i guess in conclusion, i’ve always struggled with being myself, and being proud of who i am. i’m doing a lot better with accepting myself, but there is still a long way to go. thank you reclaimthebindi for your blog and what you are doing with it. it inspires me to see other brown people who are proud and confident with who they are. our culture is not a trend, it is not or indie. it belongs to us, not to all these white girls wearing them as a fashion statement.

anyways thank you if you actually read this omg im kind nervous to post this but here it is!!! and to all my mixed/brown people out there, you are all beautiful okay. i know that some times it is hard to see, but it is true. you are all amazing!!! i love youuu  ♥  ♥  ♥