i am so motivated and shit


Since I noticed that I RARELY draw backgrounds I decided to do a 30 day background challenge!!!!!

I hope Darla and Stacy (the girls walking) will keep me motivated to do this! Please lazyness don’t overcome me!

If you would like to join me on my challenge please do so I would love to see your pieces!!!

doing my dialectical journal before practice at a starbucks, drinking a green tea frappe because holy shit it’s hotter than hell outside and i think i melt a little every time i go outside

my friends, it is now 23 days until school begins. am i excited or do i want to slip into a coma so i don’t have to go the world may never know ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Voltron Paladins with everything my friends and I have said (Part I)
  • Lance: someone insult me so I can be motivated to clean my room.
  • Pidge: Kpop is fake.
  • Hunk: Yeah, dispose those posters.
  • Lance: fuck you guys.
  • Keith: Yeah sure.
  • ...
  • Keith: Looks, I am a good student okay? I just went in to the office and casually said "This is my knife"
  • ...
  • Allura: I can't think straight...
  • Lance: then think gay *finger guns*
  • ...
  • Pidge: you can just go silent and eat your grass
  • ...
  • Keith: *looks at Lance* You're a slut
  • Lance: ...
  • Kieth: But you're my slut
  • ...
  • Allua: Okay, what happened?
  • Pidge: Shit happened.
  • Allua: You were all fighting over a one freakin' misunderstood sentence???
  • Hunk: *arguing
  • Allura: and then shit happened.
  • ...
  • Keith: I love to see the world burn 🌈🔥🌈🔥🌈
  • Shiro: I would like to see myself burn and die

popular text posts + ask memes

❛ i don’t know what i’m doing with my life, but i know i’m doing it wrong ❜
❛ i am so cute and bitter ❜
❛ my life is one part ‘wait’ and another part ‘what’ ❜
❛ my #1 talent is saying stupid things to people and immediately regretting it ❜
❛ i love sleeping to avoid problems ❜
❛ i hate myself a lot but i get offended when other people do ❜
❛ i’m hungrier than the neopet i neglected for nine years ❜
❛ hit me up if you wanna date a piece of shit ❜
❛ we need some new and more powerful swears ❜
❛ i get progressively uglier throughout the day ❜
❛ i’m so miserable, but i laugh at everything ❜
❛ i need something that is more than coffee, but less than cocaine ❜
❛ just because you’re trash doesn’t mean you can’t do great things. it’s called garbage can, not garbage cannot. ❜
❛ 90 out of 10 people agree that math is fucking lame ❜
❛ if you think i’m ugly now, you should have seen me in 2009 ❜
❛ 2010 me would literally be terrified of 2016 me and i love it ❜
❛ i have a rare skin condition called close the fucking blinds ❜
❛ hey babe, i made you this mixtape for valentines day. i don’t know many love songs, so it’s just uptown funk 18 times in a row. ❜
❛ there are people who know me in real life who think i’m straight and that’s really funny to me ❜
❛ i was cursed with expensive taste and a low budget ❜
❛ yo dude i trusted you wtf the fuck? what the fuck?? what the fuck what the ❜
❛ open flannel shirts and lingerie are the hottest thing and nobody can convince me otherwise ❜
❛ i’m the weird dad, wine mom, vodka aunt, and gay emo cousin all in one person ❜
❛ that awful moment when you wake up ❜
❛ damn haha i’m going to have to deal with that sooner or later ❜
❛ are we gonna fucking hold hands tonight or what bitch ❜
❛ people our age have children what the hell i am a children ❜
❛ i don’t like your clothes. take them off. ❜
❛ why am i only motivated to sort my life out at 4 am? ❜
❛ after i die, i’ll probably still complain ❜
❛ people are so petty and then here i am, me, an angel ❜
❛ if i don’t insult you daily, it means i don’t like you ❜
❛ do something with your life that would make a 1950s straight white man angry ❜
❛ i need to get laid… to rest. put me in a coffin. let my soul ascend. ❜
❛ i’m trying to be a better person, but some people are testing me ❜
❛ i’m overstressed and underfucked ❜
❛ i can’t wait to be a piece of shit with a bachelors degree ❜
❛ my emo phase never went away, it just aged like fine wine ❜
❛ my whole life consists of wondering whether or not to make the bitchy comment ❜
❛ i don’t have time for people who don’t believe in aliens ❜
❛ the lack of cuddling i am experiencing right now is upsetting ❜
❛ why do good concert tickets happen to bad people ❜
❛ i can’t play hard to get i’m already hard to want ❜
❛ i’m still pissed off about growing up ❜
❛ if you listen carefully, you can hear me whisper ‘shut the fuck up’ at least once every five minutes ❜
❛ when i die i want my heart donated to NASA so they can finally see what a black hole looks like up close ❜

❛ single and ready to take a 20 hour nap ❜
❛ write ‘nothing is set in stone’ on my grave as both a witty joke and a subtle warning that i will be back ❜
❛ how do people even put up with me like i can’t even put up with me ❜
❛ the opening riff to mr. brightside could literally raise me from the dead ❜
❛ stale cinnamon roll, been in this world too long, too cynical  ❜
❛ sorry, i’m poor. i can’t afford to pay attention ❜
❛ aziz ansari’s voice in the back of my head faintly telling me to treat myself is going to be my downfall ❜
❛ is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep? ❜
❛ my neutral expression makes me look like i’m always in a bad mood which is convenient because it’s usually true ❜
❛ i never run voluntarily so if you ever see me running you should start running too because something is coming ❜

Mercury + Communication
  • Aries: Give it to me straight. Get to the point. Say it like you mean it. No nitty gritty bullshit, give me the meat of what you are saying.
  • Taurus: Ease me into what you’re trying to say. Keep the communication on a practical level. No abstract ideas, ground your words into the earth and I’ll understand.
  • Gemini: However you want to explain this to me is good. I am very interested in your words. I can receive this any way you want to explain it.
  • Cancer: Communicate it to me in a way that you know I can receive. Your words strike emotional chords in my body. Be gentle as I digest it.
  • Leo: Can you explain this to me in song? Or pictures? Or dance? No? Okay well just make me feel like what you are saying holds relevance to my life and I am open ears. Also.. MAke it exciTING !!
  • Virgo: Please lay out the details for me. You speak a word and I find a million questions for clarity. I want to hear and understand everything about what you are communicating to me. Don't be vague.
  • Libra: If you really want me to hear you.. Don't be to brash, or dramatic, or all over the place. Please be concise and balanced with your communication. I appreciate what you have to say, just keep it level headed.
  • Scorpio: I want to know the truth. Give me the fucking truth. I want to know the depth. What is behind your words? What is your motive with these words? Don't you dare lie to me. I will always find out your truth.
  • Sagittarius: Give me the big picture, the philosophical concept, the dream. Ignite me with your words. Expand my mind with your communication.. I am so open.. Just don't bore me. I need a sense of purpose to listen.
  • Capricorn: If you want me to take you seriously, know your shit. Communicate factually in a mature manner. If you want me to hear you without judgement, your words must impress me. I don't have time for the wishy washy wandery words. Get to the point.
  • Aquarius: Please communicate this to me in the most abstract conceptual way you are able. If you want me to receive your communication I need to be met with intellect that causes me to really think over your words.
  • Pisces: Explain it to me in a story. I can't understand all of your crazy ass details. I need you to paint me a picture with your words.
A Comprehensive Guide:

To Making GOOD RP gifs:

The kind that people wanna like… look at…. n’stuff. 

Because… y’know… I get a lot of asks about that too. 

Well…. first off….. 

This is gonna be really fucking long… 

Second off! 


Because no one wants to be looking at this shit.

and if you don’t have a decent quality camera…. 

Well…. Make sure your acting is on point?

And all might be forgiven.

… Probably.

Now… that aside… how does one know if their gif is decent? 

Well here are a few pointers…


It’s hard to enjoy a gif with shitty lighting. 

For example… 

The Wash-Out: 

No one wants to look at your eyeballs and your nostrils floating in a featureless abyss. 

The Phantom: 

Well… there’s SOMETHING there… I think… ? *twilight zone theme-song plays* 

The Power-Outage: 

Guess what? No one will want to look at your gifs… if they can’t fucking see you.

So… let’s try this again… 

Hey… It’s daytime… in the sun? No problem. 

Hey… it’s… like… not as bright out? No problem! 

Hey… It’s the middle of the night and you’re sneaking out to go… like… shag or something? Cool. 

That’s my shagging face. 

No it’s not… I’m kidding, I promise… I’m sorry, ignore me

Keep reading

Yes Zero Time Dilemma had a lot of inconsistencies, and bugs me on a lot of points BUT it also gave me:

  • The beauty that is Carlos and the C-team OT3
  • Some of the puzzles and decisions were geniunely suspenseful and emotional (just… Fire. I don’t think I will ever be over Fire)
  • Junpei forgetting his gf is kind of a Machiavellian mastermind B O I
  • Carlos? CARLOS
  • G A B
  • the fact that Gab fucking goes to take a nap
  • honestly the “it’s the same ward” thing was actually nicely done and foreshadowed, I think
  • I ACTUALLY FIND DELTA FUN OKAY, most Extra Zero ever, go hard or go home besides he has the best aesthetics with the plague doctor outfit
  • I’m not saying Delta is like… a good villain, especially considering the previous Zeros, because dunno if I’d go that far, but sure as hell he is entertaining
  • Sigma with a bucket over his head
  • Sean is fucking adorable
  • return of the Funyarinpa
  • the Stranded Pair ending fucked me up. I don’t like all the scenes in it (you could probably guess which ones I didn’t like) but the general tone of it, and the ending was geniunely tragic
  • where would we be without the snail memes and complex motives I, for one, am grateful for Delta’s existence
  • Junpei dorky dancing after rolling three 1-s
  • Akane “I won’t trip — trips two minutes later and faints” Kurashiki
  • the FACT that Akane had to pass out in like… three different rooms, because otherwise she would have solved all that shit, she is just THAT good, the narrative had to put her into backburner a lot
  • Junpei “Are you interested~?” Tenmyouji
  • Akane saying they should cut Junpei’s limbs down so he would fit in the vents
  • the fact that both Carlos and Sigma are ripped enough they could probably carry their teammates around
  • the fact that Sean could probably carry Eric and Mira around as well
  • Sean is a pure cinnamon roll
  • the soundtrack is A+ as usual
  • Phi in general is a gem as usual
  • HONESTLY once I had gotten the hang of the FLOW chart and how the Fragments system works, I ENJOYED IT SO DAMN MUCH, it was a really clever way of telling the story in an anachronic way, I geniunely loved it so much. ZTD gave no fucks, and went all in, using the chart and the storytelling structure and the memory-wiping stuff to its advantage, and I LOVED IT

I mean I could probably write a longer list about things that annoyed or bugged me or I disliked but I DECIDED TO BE A BIT POSITIVE THIS TIME AROUND


“Did you really call the police?”
“My mom and dad are gonna be so mad at me!”
“You’ve seen one too many movies!”
“Movies don’t create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!”
“No, please don’t kill me, Mr. Ghostface, I wanna be in the sequel!”
“Should I let the machine get it?”
“Are you alone in the house?”
“You bitch, where the fuck are you?”
“Not so fast, we’re going to play a little game.”
“Guess who just called the police and reported your sorry motherfucking ass!”
“I think I’m dying here, man!”
“I’m going to rip you up, bitch!”
“What’s your favorite scary movie?”
“I’m gettin’ another beer, you want one?”
“I’ll be right back!”
“Do you like scary movies?”
“No, you listen to me you little bitch! You hang up on me again and I’ll gut you like a fish!”
“Mmmm… corn syrup. Same stuff they used for pig’s blood in ‘Carrie.’ ”
“Oh, my God. I thought you were dead.”
“I never thought I’d be so happy to be a virgin.”
“Who’s there?”
“You tricked me.”
“I wanna see breasts.”
“We all go a little mad sometimes.”
“The police are always off track with this shit! If they’d watch Prom Night, they’d save time! There’s a formula to it. A very simple formula!”
“If you were the only suspect in a senseless bloodbath - would you be standing in the horror section?”
“She was never attacked. I think she made it all up.”
“The girl has some serious issues.”
“What if she did it? What if she killed them?”
“Maybe she’s a slut, just like her mother.”
“Teen suicide is out this year and homicide is a much healthier, therapeutic expression.”
“Where do you get this shit?”
“But this is life. This isn’t a movie.”
“It’s all a movie. It’s all one great big movie. Only you can pick your genre.”
“If I’m right about this, I could save a man’s life.”
“How do you - gut someone?”
“It’s called tact, you fuck-rag.”
“It’s the millennium. Motives are incidental.”
“Well I don’t really believe in motives. I mean, did Norman Bates have a motive?”
“See, it’s a lot more scarier when there’s no motive.”
“You’re not a virgin. Now you got to die. Those are the rules.”
“This game is like a scary movie. How do you think it’s going to end?”
“What’s the matter? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Fairness would be to rip your insides out and hang you from a tree so we can expose you for the heartless, desensitized little shits that you are!”
“I will totally protect you. Yo, I am so buff, I got you covered, girl.”
“There’s always some stupid bullshit reason to kill your girlfriend.”
“That is so sexist. The killer could easily be female. Basic Instinct.”
“Why are you doing this?”
“It’s all part of the game. It’s called, GUESS HOW I’M GONNA DIE?”
“Who am I? The beer wench?”
“Looks like we’ve got a serial killer on our hands!”
“ ‘Serial Killer’ is not really accurate. Gotta knock off a couple more to get that title.”
“If I may say so, you are much prettier in person.”
“I didn’t kill anybody.”
“You still haven’t told me your name.”
“I want to know who I’m looking at.”
“I thought she was dead.”
“How does it feel to be almost brutally butchered? People want to know. They have a right to know! How does it feel?”
“I am two seconds away from calling the police!”
“They’ll never make it in time.”
“Wait, I thought we were going to go out.”
“Don’t hang up on me.”
“I told you not to hang up on me.”
“Why can’t I be a Meg Ryan movie? Or even a good porno.”
“You’re not supposed to be here.”
“Why don’t you wanna talk to me?”
“Well, you’re not going to be alone any more, right? If you pee, I pee. Is that clear?”
“It’s called subtlety. You should look it up.”
“Just think - if they make a movie about you, who’s gonna play you?”
“It’s so sad. Her mom and dad found her hanging from a tree limb, her insides on the outside.”
“I always had a thing for ya, [NAME]!”
“Cut Casper, that’s a wrap!”
“What do I have to do to prove to you that I’m not a killer?”
“Can you see me right now?”
“You make me so sick. Your entire havoc-inducing, thieving, whoring generation disgusts me.”
“Don’t freak yourself out, okay? We’ve got a long night ahead of us.”

I’ve been trying to formulate this for awhile, so here we go:

Today, I am juggling single motherhood, evading an abusive ex, full time school admission stuff while taking 9 hours of transfer classes, keeping this blog limping along, working full time in my current job while simultaneously training on a new job and handling huge IT project integration thing, handling the fallout from my two support systems in terms of child care falling through in one week, two different soccer schedules, my brother is in the hospital, and my mom and grandma both facing long-term chronic illnesses. 

And I am doing, like, okay. Not great, but good, some of the time, and okay, most of the time. That isn’t a humble brag! I never would have given myself credit to do a quarter of this a year ago, half of this six months ago, or even all of this three months ago! 

So many factors have kicked my ass into gear. Therapy is key, and that isn’t accessable to most people. I have the endless support of great family + friend. Surprisingly, going analog and using a bullet journal is the key to all of this. It started with just writing shit down.

Suddenly, I was making appointments on time. Paying my bills. Writing down my work tasks and getting them all completed. 

And this isn’t one more “drink water and your depression will go away post” or “will the sadness away.” That isn’t reality.

I’m doing all of this, and obviously my anxiety is ratcheted up, like, a lot. (Finals! in two weeks! Shit!) I’m still not sleeping, but I am overall killin’ it. I’m pretty proud of myself. For me, it started with one good decision. my goal at first was just, “OK, Linds, Make one good, forward-thinking decision today.” 

I started small: start a yoga routine. I mean, I still don’t have a yoga routine, but I do, by and large, have my shit together. Or I’m getting there. 

And now I pay my bills on time, am excelling in my job, have more confidence, got myself and kids in therapy, and am managing all of the above. 

You can come back from anything.

It started with taking fucking care of myself first. Learning that I was worth taking care of. I am still learning this. Getting whatever help I could. I read books at the library (free!) that helped teach coping strategies for managing anxiety. They weren’t cure-alls, but every little bit helps.

Anxiety doesn’t go away. I had a panic attack at work last week because I stood up to my boss. You know what? It was okay. My coworker was a great support. And my boss actually admitted he was wrong, gave me a HIGHER RATING on my review, and thanked me for bringing his slip-up (not looking at the new rating system criteria) to his attention. You can, however, have anxiety and still Kill It.

Confidence doesn’t build overnight. It is a process. Proving to yourself on, like, a daily basis that you can do it. This is my therapist’s #1 gripe with me. But look at me praising myself up there! Give yourself credit where credit is due.  Give yourself some grace, babe. You are doing your fucking best. And for today, that is good enough.

Failure is still part of the equation. I fucked up at work today! I apologized and moved on. I would have let that clobber me a year ago. Every single person makes mistakes. The world still moves on. So will you. It’s ok.

I am not a Mental Health Expert or a motivational coach, but I do believe that our stories can empower each other. It is possible to live with anxiety and still get shit done. Make ONE forward-thinking decision today, even if that one thing is taking care of yourself as best as you can. Doing homework in 20 minute increments until you finish an assignment. Whatever you can manage. 

Tomorrow, do it again plus one more.

Safe and Sound- Mitch x reader

Author: @redstringlovers

Characters: Mitch x reader

Request: “Can you do a Mitch imagine we’re he goes to kill these bad guys in a house and when he’s about to leave he hears a muffled scream and he goes to look and he sees a girl tied to a chair and she’s like bruised and bleeding so he goes and helps her and takes her home with him and she doesn’t talk at first because she’s scared but reassures her that it’s okay. Can you make it fluffy please and thank you.”

Warnings: mentions of killing, swearing, and fluff

Word count: 3,521 words

A/N: This was my very first request and I really enjoyed writing this a lot! I don’t need to tell you guys already, you know @susybird is the best with proofreading and helped me with the ending bc I’ve been writing this since 9 am and it’s currently 10:41 pm and I had no motivation whatsoever so a big huge thank you and hug to her. Also, @wittystiles for motivating me and helping me out with this! I hope you all enjoy it! Let me know what you guys think :)

Originally posted by thelaughingmagician

“Okay remember. The mission is to just get in, find the enemy, and get out. No messing around either.” Hurley announces to the group but his eyes were focused on me when he said all of that. Yeah like I’m the one that messes shit up. I guess you could say I have a reputation for not following orders, but one thing is for sure; I get shit done at the end of the day.

“Alright we’re looking for a man name Nizar Muhibb Hadad. Last seen going into this house carrying a duffel bag that is filled with all sorts of illegal drugs.” Stan points to a picture of an old, small house. The windows were shattered and the roof falling apart. Hadad was a short stubby man but also known as one of the most dangerous and powerful drug dealers out there. He’d been in a drug ring for about 4 years. We’d been tracking him down ever since but we were never fast enough to catch him in time. Until today.

Keep reading

When you’ve been studying too much and your cat has to put up with whatever you need to do to let off some steam.

1. Writing typically starts out like this:

2. Then, you get stuck:

3. So you turn on music to help your mind, and you get side tracked:

4. So then you turn the music off and sit there staring at your blank document for who knows how long:

5. Then it’s all gone to shit:

6. BUT THEN, you have an idea:

7. Repeat steps 2-6

(gifs not mine– thanks google)

anonymous asked:

What if a Ravenclaw is having a quarter life crisis(? And like doesn't know what to do with their life and can't find the motivation to do what they used to love? Bc I feel like I'm not Ravenclaw enough bc I don't know yet what I want to study next year ¿¿¿¿¿ am I still a Ravenclaw?

mate I promise you 90% of ravenclaws have no idea what the fuck they’re doing with their life. hufflepuffs and slytherins are more likely to have their shit together, the rest of us are just over here laughing hysterically so nobody knows how freaked out we are about growing up and deciding what to do with the rest of our lives

Seven Minutes In Heaven (Pt. 1 of 5)

Author: ceruleanbucky

Pairing: None yet, (eventual Steve x Mutant!Reader x Bucky [no Stucky, sorry])

Warnings: Language, mentions of a one-night stand, drinking.

Words:  603 (I know it’s short but there’s going to be five parts.)

YES HI IT IS I and I am back again! I am so horrible at updating, and I’m really sorry about that. I’m trying to write more, but it’s really hard for me because my depression takes away from my motivation and it’s a whole shit show. I’m going to do a bunch of writing over the next few days, though. The next part will be up fairly soon. Hope you homies enjoy!

“Ha! You didn’t think I would be able to do it! You didn’t think I would be able to win! Steve, you owe me a hundred bucks!” You yell triumphantly, after pinning Bucky to the wall with your powers. Bucky looks at you weirdly as you hold him there, but you brush it off. Steve hands you five 20’s and you happily pocket them.

“Hey, Y/N, you can let me go now.” Bucky mutters, reminding you that he was indeed being held by you.

“Oh, yeah” You mutter, releasing him. He falls to the floor, chuckling.

“What’re you laughing about?” You ask, a curious smile playing on your face.

“Oh, I thought of something to ask you when we play our weekly game of truth or dare.” He smirks, instantly making you wonder what the question is.

“Oh no.” You say, faking your fear.

“Oh yes.” He says, while walking out the gym doors with Steve.

Two days later you walk into one of the living rooms, searching for the rest of the team. You’re surprised to only find Steve and Bucky.

“Yo, where’s the rest of the team?” You ask, plopping down on the couch with Bucky, your legs instantly finding their homes on his lap. His hands land on top of them, sticking to routine.

“They’re on a mission. Your legs are really soft.” Bucky says, continuing to rub your sore muscles. You can’t help but find his comment adorable, as well as his seemingly shocked facial expressions.

“Yeah, I used my winnings to go to the spa. Got some waxing done. It didn’t cover the whole cost, but hey, who am I to complain?” You shrug, still proud about winning the fight. Steve walks into the room with various alcohols, including a bottle of Asguardian mead.

”Wow, Steve, looking to get drunk? We don’t usually play with alcohol.” You snicker, curious about the change. He just rolls his eyes and gives a vague response about honesty and lack of inhibition making the game better. Can’t argue there.

Once everyone has a drink, you decide to start the game out, immediately setting the tone for what kind of game it will be.

“Steve! Truth or Dare!” You say excitedly, wanting to get on with the game.

“Truth,” he mutters, slightly anxious.

“When was the last time you had sex?” You pry, making turn beet red. He starts blathering on about how he can’t remember, but Bucky interjects with the proper answer.

“Last night. He went to a bar and picked someone up.” Bucky says, laughing, finishing his drink then reaching for another. You start cackling, and reciting the mini speech that Steve gave earlier in the week about honesty, earning a laugh from Bucky and a death glare from Steve.

“Did you go with him?” You ponder aloud, wondering how he knew this. Bucky winces, and you know that the answer is no.

“We share a bedroom wall. Neither of them were particularly quiet.”  Bucky sighs, cringing at the memories of the moans from his best friend and some random girl from the bar. You look over at Steve, who is still more red than Wanda’s magic.

“OK, moving on. Bucky, Truth or Dare?” Steve asks, clearly wanting to steer the conversation away from his one-night stand.

“Dare,” he says with a mixture of confidence and apprehension, the latter of which grows when Steve smiles evilly at you and Bucky. Your smirk fades, and you mirror the same look as the metal armed man sitting next to you.

“ Bucky, I dare you to play Seven Minutes in Heaven with Y/N.”


Soooo I was reading this first article about how fanfic authors of things like bands and games profited from their hobby, and I was daydreaming of publication and getting motivated to work on my writing , then I scroll a little more and see this next article, HOLY SHIT! A fanfic author from our own fandom wrote something Dramione based and it got published?? How did I miss this!? Effing WIN for the Dramione fandom and bravo for Lena Phoria! I am slightly green with envy, this is the stuff of my dreams! Absolutely amazing! So happy this ship is making waves. Writers out there doing the damn thing, I am inspired!

Keto Month 1 results

•Lost 12.4 pounds
• Lost 4.75 inches from my waist
•Lost inches everywhere else (too many numbers to document here…I am documenting though)
•Sleeping more soundly, waking up refreshed (at 0430 q am, no doubt)
•Carb cravings? What carb cravings? GONE.
•Getting shit done like a boss (ENERGY!)
•Moods=stable (as much as a moon-child, Cancerian INFJ can be)
•MOST IMPORTANTLY: Chronic Lyme symptoms have nearly vanished. I am amazed!

I can not believe how happy this lifestyle has made me in so little time. I’m motivated, exhilarated, thinking clearly and able to focus. I love my new lifestyle!

anonymous asked:

I'm sorry if this is a personal question, but I don't know anyone with depression and I was wondering how to accurately portray someone with depression? I have a character who develops it, and I wanted to make it realistic rather than just winging it. Thank you in advance :)

It is personal, but I’d prefer you ask as opposed to winging it. I’ve seen some really shitty portrayals of depression, so I’m happy to help rectify that.

Depression manifests itself differently for different people, but the number 1 mistake IMO is this: depression and sadness are not the same thing. I’ve seen writers describing depression as overwhelming grief, or bursting into tears at random. Yeah, I’ve never done this even at my most suicidal state. I don’t know anyone with clinical depression who’s done this either. That’s not to say it never happens, but I wouldn’t categorize that as an obvious sign of depression.

The most blatant sign of depression: lethargy. Exhaustion. Your whole body is heavy. You wake up with a boulder on your chest, and you gotta drag that boulder around everywhere you go. That’s one of the reasons so many depressed people stay in bed - getting up is too much fucking effort. 

Which brings me to my next point: lack of motivation (aka numbness). Everything is pointless. Doesn’t matter if it used to make you happy, it doesn’t anymore. There’s a consistent “why even bother?” thought circulating through your mind. You stop giving a shit. There’s this song lyric I feel defines depression well: but in my heart, I am lukewarm. Nothing ever really touches me.

Last point: self-loathing. It’s not an active hatred, it’s just an overall feeling of worthlessness. Why should I write? I’m not talented anyway. Why should I shower? I have no one to impress. Why should I live? No one gives a fuck about me. Please keep in mind, these thoughts are not self-pitying. They don’t make you weepy. They feel like factual statements - plus you’re numb, so they can’t make you weepy regardless. Your existence ceases being valuable, and being alive feels like a burden.

Keep in mind that most depressed people still have to live normal lives, go to school, go to work. They don’t want people fretting over them or embarrassing them, so they’ll put on a happy face and pretend everything’s totally cool. Comedians are often mentally ill - no one can know you’re suffering if you’re making everyone laugh, right?

Additionally, keep in mind we are more than our mental illness. A character should not revolve around their depression. Depression also comes and goes. 

Hope this helps. 

This so called fandom...

The last couple of days I’ve lost some of my motivation for covering Tarjei’s whereabouts and career. Not because of anything he’s done but because I am frankly fed up with fans on all social media platforms thinking they have a say in what Tarjei chooses to do or the quality of his projects. 

What we know about En affære is only the main and some of the supporting cast, Markus’ and Anita’s Instagram posts, the genre and (maybe) the plot in general. But from this, many fans have concluded that 

  1. “the movie is going to be shit”
  2. “the casting is a joke and Lea was only cast to mock Skam fans”
  3. “the director and the rest of the crew are not serious and considers the entire project a joke”
  4. Tarjei choosing to do this movie (and having to cut his hair and muscle up) collides with their view of him as “their baby”, hence it’s a mistake

Isn’t it amazing how many fans have so much insight into a closed production (two days into filming) and the feelings and motivations of the crew? Hint, I’m highly ironic. And just a bit riled up.

I’ve let it be known before what I think of the project (positive thoughts only) but I just want it to be clear that I don’t agree with any of the above.