i am seeing them live tomorrow if they play this song i may pass out


word count ; 3,502
admin ; ari♡
genre ; university au, angst, smut, fluff
part of the collaboration project “generation sadness” by @fuckmeupexo.

Originally posted by baekintime

The pianist in room 302 goes by the name of Baekhyun, he has fingers that make people dream, girls quiver, women whimper. But then you came and he just doesn’t know which keys to press.

You let out an exaggerated sigh as you crumple the small paper your partner had given you with his house address printed on it. 

After looking for over an hour for a house everyone wished they had the pleasure of going to, the conclusion you had come up with was that sadly, you were indeed, and most definitely lost. 

Being a music major that specializes in vocals did without doubt have its ups and downs. 

Everyone always looking down at you for being one in a billion of people in the world who wanted to make it big in the industry. Competing against hundreds of talented people who had the exact same dream as you. 

Trying not to over do your voice all the time just so that it wouldn’t damage your cords in any way. Having to constantly drink ginger shots so you wouldn’t somehow get an infection that’d impede you from not performing at a certain time. 

In simpler words, it most certainly wasn’t easy in any way, to be a singer. 

However, if someone where to ask you what was the worst thing you had come across in this long journey, you’d say it was having to be assigned to work with the absolute most obnoxious pianist you ever had the displeasure of meeting, for the annual end of the year university show.

Some knew him as the guy who’d spend most of his time in room 302, playing along tenderly to the keys of the sparkling piano, creating beautiful melodies only some could dream of making themselves.

Others however, knew him as the guy who’d always show up to events with different girls at his side. Playing them all almost just as much as he plays the keys. 

When your music instructor had called you up for a chat outside the classroom, you thought you must had done something wrong, or failed to hit a note in one of the weekly mini concerts you’d attend to for the school. 

Yet, when he said the words any music major wanted to hear, you couldn’t help but feel as if there was a catch or something he wasn’t fully letting you know. 

When he told you, you’d have the honor to perform in front of the entire university for the annual end of the year show, you knew something about it was simply too good to be true.

Looking back now, you should have declined the offer.

The professor only told you who you were performing with a week after, once all the preparations were made and once you couldn’t back off from it.

You had gotten out of class this afternoon only to find a small note taped to the hood of your car, with what you believe to be your partners address. 

Being on the brink of giving up, you look to your right side softly, ready to turn back and go home, only to see a big white modern home in the distance.

As you pull up to the house you can’t help but notice theres something outside the main door. You get out and grab your keys as you put them inside your purse. When you reach the door you see what you guess to be a heel?

You crouch down and pick up the small pointy red shoe, inspecting it.

“Baekhyun doesn’t wear heels does he?…. I guess I  really am lost” you sigh as you stand up only to find an amused Baekhyun looking right back at you.

“You’re late.”

You let out a breathe you didn’t even know you were holding all this time. You were incredibly relieved to have finally found his place after all the time you spent searching for it.

“Yeah I know, I couldn’t find my way around. Im Y/N, nice to finally meet you.” you smile, as you extend your hand toward him

“Well, don’t let it happen again okay? Im Baekhyun, but you probably already know that” He smirks as he shakes your hand quite roughly.

You can’t help but glare at him for his cocky behavior. 

Suddenly, a blonde lady with an oversized shirt and just one red heel on her foot, identical to the one you saw before, passes by him, pecking him on the lips as she runs towards her car.

You look at him bewildered. 

Thats probably one of his many women. 

“Come inside I’ll show you where we’ll be practicing for the performance.” he says, ignoring the fact that a semi naked girl just ran out of his house.

He swiftly leads you into his brightly decorated home, not even letting you look around before you find yourself inside a small studio.

The small space was decorated with guitars, keyboards of all sizes, drums, even recording microphones. But right in the center was a dazzling white piano that stood out from all the rest of the instruments.

“I don’t know why they paired me with you, to be quite frank, you’re a beginner and I’m easily the best pianist in the entire university, so why would they get me on such a low level as to having to perform with you.” 

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing, he was belittling you and the worst of all of it is how simply he said those words that cut daggers into your heart.

You probably hated this much more than him, having to work with an egotistical guy, whom thought the world was at his feet. So why was he complaining. A beginner? Is that what he called you?

You couldn’t help but feel the need to prove him wrong, and that was exactly what you were going to do, but not before you put him in his place.

“Listen, bacon is it? I strongly agree that they couldn’t have paired us  worse than they did, however I’ll have you know while yes, I may be a beginner I’m definitely no joke, I take my major very seriously. Don’t go around throwing accusations because I promise I’ll show you just how wrong you are to think of me so poorly. Now, on other note, have you thought of a song yet?” you throw a fake smile at him, as you turn the conversation around, not up for an agreement when the show was just a month away.

“I haven’t but-”

“Great, then we’ll do No One by Alicia Keys” you let out with a grin

“Seriously?” He snickers almost as if he couldn’t believe you had truthfully decided on that

“Yes, its a great song and truthfully, my vocals work with this song really well, aside from that I think it’d be a challenge for you to work on this song since its not like others you play. Or what you can’t play the piano for this one because its too complicated for you?” You look at him dead on, challenging him to decline and prove to you he’s not as great as he so thinks.

“No, its perfect” he smiles, accepting the challenge.

“Great. Lets begin then”

You walk towards the microphone, adusting it to your height as he begins to gently play the piano, initiating the song.

“I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better”

You shift side-to-side, as the rhythm begins to take you away, and you continue signing the lyrics.

And like that, you and Baekhyun began practicing everyday, until days turned to weeks and now tomorrow was the day you’d have to perform for the show together. 

Strangely, over those days you and him grew fond of each other, talking about the randomest of things and laughing until your stomachaches would hurt.

He strangely made you happy. And you were sure the same goes for him.

You would act like if you knew each other your whole life, and it was wonderful how great you both were together as a team.

You even began to notice how the amount of girls he’d bring home slowly started decreasing, until the point where you wouldn’t see any of the girls he’d sleep with. 

Unlike before, where on the first days you’d come meet him for practice, and there’d always be reminders of his one night stands. Thongs, shoes, shorts. Even some of the girls would run into you at some point.

But weirdly enough, you haven’t seen any of that since a week ago. 

Pulling up into the familiar driveway, you get out of your car as you prepare yourself for your last practicing session with Baekhyun.

As you were getting ready to knock on the wooden door, it opens up to reveal the same blonde you had seen a month ago.

You were wrong. Perhaps he was seeing them, just not so openly like before.

You couldn’t help but feel a coil in the pit of your stomach tighten up, making your mouth dry, and filling you up with disappointment.

“Oh its you, you won’t be able to fuck him today, he’s all worn out from last night.” she says with a fake polite smile, that are contrary to her malicious words.

fuck him?

does she think you’re another one of his play things?

You stand up straight as you glare at her, pushing her aside and going through the door, finding a pissed of Baekhyun in the living room.

“Wait for me in the studio. I’ll explain everything later”

You felt anger rush inside you.

“What for Baekhyun? So you can kiss one of your many girls goodbye? Its fine, I know the type of guy you are. And frankly I don’t care whatever you do or don’t do for that matter. You’re a grown man, you can make your own decisions without owing me an explanation. Just hurry up, I want to get this over with.” 

You turn your back toward him and walk to the studio, feeling jealousy pooling up in your stomach, and not helping but to think you were crazy for believing he ever ended his foolish ways.

You hear a door slam, and light footsteps approaching the studio.

An upset Baekhyun makes your view and you feel utterly helpless.

You realize after all of this time, you were attracted to him.

You noticed how you were slowly falling for his extremely loud laugh.

The way his slender fingers would gently finger the piano’s keys.

How he’d sound so confident when talking about his talent for playing the beautiful piano.

It all somehow made you fall for him.

For Byun Baekhyun.

“Y/N, Its not like that, she came to try and reason with me about how she’s a great catch, and how she’ll make me regret not going out with her. Nonsense, I know. Just, whatever she told you, don’t believe her, I have nothing going on with her.”

“Its alright really, you don’t need to explain yourself to me, I’m extremely sorry I lashed out on you like that, I don’t know what came over me. I-”

Before you could say another word, his lips were aggressively against yours, shutting out whatever you had to say.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for the longest of time now.” he says against your lips, smiling softly


“Its fine, I know” 

he swiftly pulls you against the wall, resulting in a glass guitar that was hanged against it to instantly fall down onto the floor, shattering into multiple pieces.

“I want you Baekhyun. I need this.”

“Me too baby, me too.”

Baekhyun suddenly placed you on the cold pianos surface.

The chilled surfaces’ coldness passed through your jeans, making small goosebumps to appear on the tenderness of your skin.

He grabbed your left hand and licked between fingers, running his tongue around and along the crevices of them. Your inside clenched on nothing as you moaned out loud at his lewd actions.

You would have never thought he’d do this to you. Or that he’d feel this way. The thought made you swell with warmth and love for the gorgeous man above you.

He flipped you on your back and straddled your hips, pinning you down.

“You’re so perfect Y/N. Whenever I hear your beautiful voice, singing to your hearts content, it makes me fall just a little bit deeper every time. I’ve been wanting you so bad it hurts baby.”

He nibbled on your ear, his breath burning alongside your skin, trailing his lips to the side of your mouth, never fully kissing you like you wanted.

His slender hand wrapped itself against your warm neck, ring-filled fingers rubbing agains your jaw, chilling you to the bone and making you drip with wetness each time more than the one before.

You kissed him roughly, almost as if demonstrating that you were claiming him as your own. He instantly returned the favor with rough grinding against you, and using his free hand to rip your shirt and jeans away from your body.

As you arched your back, Baekhyun tightened even more his grip against your neck, and with the sensual kiss still going on, the action ended up adding even more fuel to the fire happening inside your body. 

You moaned loudly as he was stealing your breath. Your entire being eventually found itself pleading for air as stars filled your vision and you were gasping for any small amount of oxygen you could get.

Once you finally came to realization your panties and bra were long gone and Baekhyun was preparing himself to go inside you.

You moaned out as you shut your eyes tightly. Your hips couldn’t stop themselves from rocking, begging for a feel of his touch. Almost as if he was able to read your desires like an open book, he gave in and thrusted a digit.

His veiny finger could be felt all the way inside your core.

Thrashing around, trying to find that wonderful spot that’ll make you release instantly just for him.

The feeling of it all was extremely erotic and you couldn’t help but scream out his name so he’d give in and finally fuck you.

He curled against your raw velvety walls and held you tighter against him, moaning into your ear the dirtiest of his fantasies, doing nothing other than wrecking you, and making you shatter before him.

“Beakhyun! Ah!”

The entire feeling, It was too much –  he himself was too much for you. 

You arched back at an inimaginable angle, just as Baekhyun pulled away, the second you were about to find your much needed release.

“You’re doing great, baby”

He kissed all over you neck, trailing down onto your collarbones and sucking harshly there.

His body ghosted over yours, as he lined up and rammed into you core, taking your breathe away as he didn’t even wait for your adjustment before he thrusted again, deeply. 

Immediately hitting the one spot inside you that’d make you fall apart in seconds. 

You screamed out his name when he began thrusting into you faster.

He suddenly kissed you hungrily, devouring your sinful scream in his deep kiss. And before you could form a clear thought, he thrusted forward and hit deep within you. A bundle of nerves reacted in a spasm of electricity.

Your hips bucked forward to meet him half-way, as he pushed you back down against the piano just as your pelvis touched his in a rush. 

You saw a blissful star filled vision, and hit your release, as you moaned into his neck, biting him in the process.

A few seconds later, he moaned into your ear as you felt him find his own climax.

In that moment you didn’t know what had just happened, or what would happen for that matter.

All you knew was that you and him liked each other, 

And how Baekhyun had passionately obeyed his and your body’s desires. 

And you couldn’t be happier about both.

Before you could process what was happening you were putting back on your clothes and were practicing for the big show that’d happen tomorrow.


It was finally the day of the performance and you couldn’t be happier, you hadn’t seen Baekhyun ever since yesterday and didn’t have the chance to talk to him about what had happened.

You couldn’t admit it but deep inside, you knew you were hooked

He was like a drug. And frankly you couldn’t help but feel addicted.

“You’re on in 3″ you hear the stage director mumble to you.

The pressure starts kicking in and you feel excited but sick at the same time.

What if you mess up?

What if somewhere in the crowd theres a talent agent and you mess up so he won’t help you out?

You shift towards the mirror in your small dressing room, as you check yourself out, trying to distract yourself from the nerve wrecking situation and end up smiling gingerly when you see how beautiful the long black diamond-studded dress looked on you.

The dress hugged all of your curves perfectly and was paired with 6 inch black stiletto high heels.

You suddenly feel a light tap on your shoulder and turn around to be faced with Baekhyun.

He was styled with a simple black tuxedo and his hair styled messily, making him look extremely attractive.

You noticed you were gawking at him when you found him smirking back at you.

“You look gorgeous.”

“Thank you, so do you… Wait no, I mean you look extremely handsome as well.”

You blush at your failed intent to compliment him.

If you’re being honest, he’s just so captivating that you stumbled on your words.

He doesn’t need to know that though.

Baekhyun pulls you toward him, kissing you cheek sweetly.

“Come on, Its time.”

You grab his hand as you walk towards the stage, seeing all the university students clapping out loud and cheering for you both.

You look back at Baekhyun who’s sitting at the piano looking right at you, with a grin planted onto his face.

Moving to grab the microphone, you let yourself be led by the music and the lyrics that somehow now, hold a much stronger meaning to you.

“I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better

You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don’t worry ‘cause
Everything’s going to be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all I know is everything’s going to be alright”

You smile to yourself as you feel the love you feel you feel for Baekhyun grow inside you. After just a month, he let himself into your heart and somehow became its sole owner.

“No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I’m feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel for you

When the rain is pouring down
And my heart is hurting
You will always be around
This I know for certain

You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don’t worry 'cause
Everything’s going to be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all I know is everything’s going to be alright”

You look back, expecting to see Baekhyun lost in the pianos rhythm and keys, only to be taken back when you find him smiling back at you, and winking at you slightly, making your heart swell in your chest.

“No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I’m feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel

I know some people search the world
To find something like what we have
I know people will try try to divide something so real
So till the end of time I’m telling you there ain’t no one

No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I’m feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel for you”

When the music ends, you slightly bow and grab Baekhyun’s hand as you throw your arms in the air together cheerfully.

He grabs your wrist and he ends up hugging you in front of the screaming crowd.

You can’t help but feel your stomach flip when you think of all the endless possibilities that await you in your future alongside him.

While it all did happen in just the span of a month, you know for sure, this attraction you have towards him and he has toward you, will last an eternity. And just like your love for music, your love for each other will prosper and will continue to grow with time.

King - Robb Stark

Anonymous said:

Hello lovely! I was wondering if you could write something for my child Robb Stark based on the song perfect by ed sheeran. If you don’t want to that’s completely okay I just love your writing. Thank you! 💕

A/N: I tried a thing…tell me what you think…. (Words: 3140)

Y/N Hornwood, whose House was sworn to the Starks, had known Robb Stark once. They met as children, but now they met through war. Would things still be the same or would Robb be too caught up in the war to even notice her?

Originally posted by dreamofspring

Music flooded through the tarps of Robb’s tent as he loomed over his map of Westeros. His mind wasn’t on the celebration outside; while his men drank to the victory at the Whispering Wood, the Young Wolf thought out his next move.

Robb was so enthralled by possible strategies, he didn’t notice his mother walking into the tent. When Catelyn walked into his line of sight, her son’s back straightened and he gave his mother a tired smile.

“Sorry, mother, I was thinking about the next attack. Tywin is going to want the Kingslayer back, but he’s too far-”

“Robb,” Catelyn interrupted, “please, take a breath.” She placed a comforting hand on her son’s shoulder. At the contact, Robb’s war-ready spirit wavered. “Your father would be proud of you,” Catelyn said, causing Robb to furrow his brows.

“For sentencing two thousand men to die?” He shook his head, feeling tears sting at his eyes. He would be his father’s biggest disappointment.

“No,” Catelyn whispered, “he would be proud of how you fought. With honor, for your family.” His mother’s voice faltered, cries threatening to spill out her throat. The loss of Ned was still fresh on her heart, just as it was for Robb.

Feeling his mother’s pain, Robb wrapped his strong arms around Catelyn as she felt tears spring free from her eyes. She held onto her son and as she closed her eyes, she could see the day Robb was first brought into the world. The days that passed when Ned met his first born son. Oh the plans her husband had for their child; all for not now.

“This is not the life he wanted for you,” she choked out, “he wanted you in Winterfell, married with children of your own.” Catelyn pulled away from her son’s embrace, “to give that up, the easy way in, your father would be proud.”

“Thank you, mother,” Robb said lowly. His tired smile relaxed as he looked into his mother’s comforting gaze. A crashing sound from outside disrupted the moment and called the celebration outside to Robb’s attention. “How are the men?”

“Drunk,” Catelyn stated bluntly, making Robb smile a little. “They are hoping to see their King celebrating as well,” she coaxed. Her encouragement was met by a frown from Robb; he had no desire to watch his intoxicated force dance to old tunes. “It would do them, and yourself, some good. Tomorrow’s fighting can hold for the evening.”

“That sounds like an order,” Robb said, his smile holding firm.

“You may be the King in The North, but I am still your mother,” Catelyn pointed out. Robb grinned, feeling the weight of command lifting off his shoulders for a moment.

“I will drink,” Robb said reluctantly, “but only to put your spirit at ease.” Catelyn smiled at her son, linking her arm in his. As Robb walked her out of the tent, men clapped and cheered. Robb’s heart beat raced at the sound, the admiration of his men.

“Goodnight my boy,” Catelyn said softly, “and make wise choices.” She unlinked her arm and Robb watched as his mother walked through the camp. He knew where she was going; to question Jaime Lannister on his sister’s whereabouts.

Before he could even think about going with her, a man handed him a mug of ale. The old soldier clapped Robb on the back with a toothless grin.

“For you mah King,” the man cheered. Robb gave him a nod of thanks and lifted his mug to the surrounding men.

“For you, as you have fought valiantly for this victory! May there be more victories to come!” The men yelled in agreement and took swigs of their drinks. The ale burned as it traveled down Robb’s throat. It was more bitter than the wine his father would allow him at supper but it was a drink all the same.

Robb nodded and thanked men he passed as he made his way towards the largest bonfire he had ever seen. Bards surrounding the flames sang and played upbeat tunes, coaxing some people to dance. Field nurses danced with soldiers happily, as if the war didn’t exist at all.

“Robb!” The Young Wolf turned his head in the direction of the voice. Theon, seemingly tipsy, wandered over to him. “You finally decided to join us!”

“Aye,” he said, his Tully-blue eyes scanning over the crowd, “I couldn’t resist.” Robb’s tone was meant to be somewhat sarcastic, but the Ironborn didn’t seem to notice. Theon grinned and took a gulp of whatever he was drinking.

“Try to get lucky tonight, yeah?” Theon said drunkenly, “live like you might die tomorrow!” Robb rolled his eyes as the ward bounded off, trailing after some poor nurse girl. Robb had no intention of sleeping with anyone tonight, he’d be lucky if he slept at all.

He looked around once more and couldn’t help but marvel at the banners that surrounded him. All vassal houses of House Stark, formed together in a Northern union. Robb only wished his father could see the Bolton’s flayed man sitting beside the crossed chains of the Umbers; or the fierce Mormont bear drinking with the Hornwood’s black moose.

A change of music broke the King from his thoughts and pulled his attention to the lack of dancers. The song was now slow, as if meant for a galla. Some couples, mismatched warriors and their prostitutes, danced along to the beat. The sight made Robb’s heart swell a little as he thought of Sansa; she had always dreamed of a dance with a prince. If, When, she were to return, she’d be one of the Princesses in the North. He could almost see her smile.

“My King,” the soft voice pulled Robb’s eyes away from the flames. He turned his head to the right and saw the owner of the melodic tone. Y/N Hornwood, the Fiery Winter Rose; she was one of the last Hornwood Ladies.

“Lady Hornwood,” Robb said, respectfully dipping his head. Y/N smiled, but shook her head at his words. Robb raised an eyebrow at her.

“Lady Hornwood was my mother,” she said bittersweetly, “please, call me Y/N. We have known each other long enough.” A bit of her fire shown through her beautiful face and rosy cheeks. Robb now understood her accurate nickname.

Keep reading

Here it is, 4.6k words of angst! And I’m dead tired! This was so difficult to write because, well, the request was very unspecific and I had a clear goal in mind and ended up going too far! But it’s okay, I think! I hope! Anyway, this is Shinsou angst for a good friend and all of you lovely readers~

Saturday night is date night, since it’s the only day you and Shinsou don’t work.

Being a pro hero is hard, but it’s a job you know Shinsou worked very hard to get. You didn’t want to be a hero, but you supported his dreams completely and got a job that would allow you to stay up to date with the things he does. You work as an editor and second designer in one of the more famous hero magazines, and it’s a lot of work to read and criticise article after article, and make changes to the magazine’s design to match the flow of the stories. It leaves you with very little time to spend away from a keyboard, so you’re often working from home.

Shinsou, on the other hand, is barely home. Sometimes it is lonely, but you’re comforted immediately after you change into one of his baggy jumpers or the much larger sweatpants he wore to bed the night before. Even after washing them, his clothes always smell distinctly like him – although of course, cleaner.

Your friends from high school sometimes express how rare it is for two people with such hectic occupations to still be together. They’d tease and giggle about how cute it is that Shinsou and yourself are still like a new couple, when the reality is that you started dating 4 years ago.

Even before you started dating, you and Shinsou were casual, comfortable friends. It was really just a last minute mutual decision to start introducing yourselves as a couple to people who asked. You’d spent so much time together in the general education class during your first year that it was considered, as Monoma from Class B had called it, “a cold day in hell” whenever you were not seen together.

In recent days, you’re not see together unless you’re both sleeping (Shinsou is usually only sleeping for two hours at most before he’s up again, moving around the room as quietly as he can as he get’s ready for another day at 4 in the morning), or it’s a Saturday.

This time, it’s Saturday, and you’d both come to the agreement that date night wouldn’t be anything too big or special this week. A movie, some real food (“I can’t believe all you’re eating is delivery food and cup ramen every day.”, “Well I can’t believe you’re not eating anything at all on most days. What? Don’t give me that look; you think I don’t see your cheek bones almost protruding out of your skin?”), and lots of cuddles. Shinsou was not going to let you get up to pee without holding onto any part of you within reach for as long as he could.

Unfortunately, it was more like you’d have to cling onto him until you physically couldn’t anymore, and that was when he was standing at the front door dressed head to toe in his hero gear.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Jamie had many talents and interests. What would he be nerdy about in the modern world? How would Claire find out and what does she think?

We Live For Love

Four o’clock found them at a social club in Little Italy. One of the owners also happened to be Claire’s landlord – Jamie had been skeptical when she’d approached the door, but as soon as they entered she’d been welcomed like one of the family.

So now they sat in the back of the main room, watching a group of middle-aged men play cards and smoke cigarettes and speak occasionally to one of the constant stream of younger men who passed through the door, wanting to have a word or lay a fat envelope on the table.

“Good day today,” Jamie said after a while, idly swirling the dregs of his Jack Daniels in the small glass.

Claire sat beside him, so that together they faced the room. She didn’t speak, but he knew she had heard him.

“I knew it would be hard,” she replied after a while. “But after today, I realize just how much I don’t know.”

“That’s OK. You’re new at this. You’re not expected to know everything right away.”

“But if I want to be successful, Jamie – I *have* to know it right away.” She finished her vodka soda and turned to face him, eyes bright with a heady mix of anxiety and alcohol. “I don’t want to be a novelty act – I want to be respected. I want to be admired. I want people to look past the fact that I wear a skirt and see me for who I am.”

Her eyes watered – he couldn’t tell if it was from feeling or from the drinks. Desperately he wanted to reassure her – but she wasn’t a woman to be reassured. She needed to hear the truth, and as often as possible.

“It’ll be damn hard, Claire.” He held her gaze, trying to give her strength. “There aren’t many women like you – Debbie Harry, sure, and Chrissie Hynde. Maybe Patti Smith. But nobody’s doing what you want to. You won’t fit into anyone’s box.”

“I don’t want to,” she whispered. “I never have.”

Had she been any other woman – or girl – he would have laid his hand on top of hers.

But Claire Beauchamp was different. She deserved more. She deserved better.

“Do you trust me?” he whispered. “Do you trust me to help you in whatever way I can?”

“You haven’t steered me wrong yet,” she half-smiled. “And you helped me find my voice. I’ve been looking for it ever since I decided to do this – I knew it was in me, somewhere. But I couldn’t ever really find it.”

Sensing an opening, he waved to get the bartender’s attention, gesturing for another round.

“How long have you been working at this?”

She picked up two peanuts from the dish between them, waiting for their glasses to be cleared away and fresh drinks set on the sticky vinyl tablecloth.

“About a year now. Ever since I decided to divorce my husband.”

Well then. She had opened the door – but he didn’t want to step through it.

Respecting her.

“I’m sorry.” He took a sip of bourbon. “That it didn’t work out with him, I mean.”

“I’m not.” She squeezed the lime wedge into her vodka soda and stirred it with the paper straw. “I married him when I was nineteen. We argued for most of the seven years before I decided it was over. I sang in the church choir, and then in some small clubs. He didn’t like it. I had bigger dreams than he wanted me to have.”

So she was twenty seven. And here he was at twenty three – giving *her* advice.

How to respond when someone tells you something so private? Better to play it safe.

“Why rock music?”

She looked down at the glass held between her hands. “Why not? I’ve already walked away from everything. What do I have to lose?”

The card table exploded in laughter.

Jamie nudged her knee under the table, and waited for her to look up at him.

“What do you want, Claire? What would make you happy?”

She thought a long, long time before answering.

“To prove to myself that I can do it. That I have what it takes. And I’ll never let anyone else tell me what to do, ever again.”

He lifted his glass to softly clink against hers.

“Then I’ll do whatever I can to make that happen, Claire.”

And then she smiled – and his heart stuttered.

“And what about you, Jamie Fraser?” she asked, tipping back her glass. “What would make you happy?”

“To be recognized as a songwriter, not just a guitar player. I can manage things – not just work as a hired hand.”

“I don’t see you as a hired hand,” she said softly. Almost to herself.

“I’m very glad of it, Claire,” he replied, just as softly. Then stood. “Come on. We’ve got a big day tomorrow. May I walk you home?”

Somewhere in the quiet, dark hours of the night, when Jamie stared up at the paint peeling from his ceiling and listened to Ian’s snores across the room and the bum rifling through the bottles on the street below – the melody sprang, fully formed, into his mind.

He tore off his sheets like a madman, dashed to the bathroom, flipped on the light, and hastily scribbled in the small spiral notebook he kept under his pillow.

Yes – a good, solid chord progression. Rhythm guitars supporting a strong solo guitar, deeper notes allowing a beautiful soprano voice to just float to the top of the composition.

Intro – then verse – and soaring chorus – then another verse, another chorus. Then a bridge, and the chorus. Then a fade out.

He sat back on the closed lid of the toilet, finger tracing the chords on the page. Yes – this would be perfect.

The lyrics would come later. But for now, he had a song. A song for her.

Murtagh FitzGibbons arrived at the Bowery rehearsal space around eleven the next morning, not quite sure what to expect from his musical experiment.

After a ten-minute set comprised of three covers – Blondie, Mellencamp, and AC/DC’s “Highway to Hell” – it was clear that Claire Beauchamp had found her voice as a bona fide rock and roll singer.

It was time to call up Joe Abernathy at Chrysalis Records.

Mechanical Lullaby ~1st Day~

Mechanical Lullaby Event Story (12/01)

Part 1~4 | 5~8 | 9~12 | 13~16 | 17~22

Part 5 - Jane

Terra (Nanase Riku): So this is a library… it’s so wide.

Jane (Izumi Iori): May I help you?

Jane: Hm? … Are you by chance, Terra?

Terra: Yes, I am! Are you Jane-san?

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Friends to Lovers Pt. 6

(A/N) First of all, I’m no longer sure if it’s the wifi here or my laptop. Either way, I’m excited to be back in Vienna in…well…16 days…well…I miss my bed…I want to go home!
But what’s more important than that, YOU GUYS ARE SO SWEET! I’m so very sorry that I never answer if you write any comments under my fanfic, but If I did, I would anwer as my main blog, because this is just a side blog, so…yeah…Never think that I’m just ignoring you or anything! Your comments make my day, I swear! And I’ll put a link for the song at the end of this part.
P.S.: I’m still going to kill the wifi here and my laptop

Warnings: Nightmare, Singing


If anyone else wants to be tagged, just say so :)

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Originally posted by go-fandom-imagines

Eric POV

I was back in Erudite, sitting in this big room, completely alone. I waited for a few minutes. A blonde lady entered the room. “Eric Coulter. 16. Choosing Ceremony tomorrow. The test said that the best faction for you would be Erudite, the second best would be Dauntless. You’re smart and strong. And Divergent.” Her voice was like ice, piercing my ears with every word she uttered. “What are you going to choose tomorrow?” She sat down opposite of me, keeping her eyes on the tablet in front of her.
“I don’t know yet.” I tried to catch her eye, so I could read her, but she avoided eye contact.
“I’ll tell you. You’ll choose Dauntless. You’ll work very hard and become on of the leaders. Win their trust and convince them to cooperate with Erudite. If you don’t choose Dauntless, or you fail at any task I give you, I’ll kill you for being a Divergent.” Now she looked me in the eyes. And she was serious. Dead serious.
“But, wh…” “What about (Y/N)? You’ll leave her. After you change faction you won’t talk to her, or even look at her. Trust me, I’ll know if you do. If she follows you to Dauntless, you’re free to do whatever you want with her.” I stared at my hands, intertwined and squeezing each other in my lap. I couldn’t leave (Y/N)! But if I don’t, she’ll kill me and that way I’d leave her too.
“Oh, I changed my mind.” I looked at her, hope written all over my face. “If you fail me, I’ll first kill (Y/N), letting you watch, and then I’ll kill you. Have a nice day.”
She left the room and I knew what I had to do, even with (Y/N) would hate me for it.

The setting changed. I was in a room, bright and clean. My hands were bound behind my back and I was on my knees. I failed that woman, Jeanine, and now I was paying for it.
They brought in (Y/N), her hands were bound too and she had a cloth in her mouth to keep her from screaming. As soon as she saw me, she relaxed a bit.
“What did I tell you Eric? If you fail me, I’ll kill her.” (Y/N)s eyes instantly widened and she tried to struggle. “Stop it!” I began to struggle too, trying to get the ropes of.
“Say goodbye Eric.” With one bang (Y/N) laid on the floor, her lifeless eyes staring at me. Then there was a second bang and my vision went black.

I woke up, the room was black, not white. And I was alive. That’s good. That’s really good.
I was back at Dauntless, in my apartment. I didn’t fail Jeanine and she didn’t kill (Y/N).
Wait! What about (Y/N)?! I looked around frantically, needing to confirm that he was alive.
“Ngh…” Someone moved beside me. “Eric?” It was (Y/N). My sweet, innocent (Y/N). She sat up, looking at me. Her hair was all over the place and sleep was still present in her eyes.
“Go back to sleep, didn’t want to wake you up.” I laid back down, using my left arm as a pillow.
“Mhm.” She laid down too, but she placed her head on top of my chest and wrapped her arms around my waist. “You still know that play from school?” (Y/N) buried her face in my chest but kept on talking. “The one about the girl? And the sea?” I wrapped my right arm around her waist, pressing her body against mine.
“Yeah. Moana. Do you remember that one song?” “There were so many songs, which one?”

I have crossed the horizon to find you
I know your name
They’ve stolen the heart from inside you
But this does not define you
This is not who you are
You know who you are

“Oh this one. Yeah. That scene was awesome.” I smiled a little at the memory. “There is this other song that matched this one, but our teacher didn’t want to put them together.” (Y/N) nodded and began singing again.

I am the girl who loves my island
And the girl who loves the sea
It calls me
I am the daughter of village chief
We are descendants from voyagers
Who found their way across the world
They call me
I delivered us to where we are
I’ve journeyed farther
I am everything I learned and more
Still it calls me
And the call isn’t out there at all
It’s inside me
It’s like the tide
Always falling and raising
I will carry you here in my heart
You’ll remind me
That come what may
I know the way
I am Moana

“Why did we even have to watch this play? I mean, what was the benefit for us?” I stared at the ceiling, waiting for (Y/N) to answer. “I think they wanted to show us that it’s okay to leave everything behind us when we change faction.” She snuggled further into me. “Not everything, huh?” She didn’t answer, already asleep. “I’m sorry (Y/N).”
I got out of bed and walked to the living room to call Jeanine.


I woke up, finding the bed beside me empty. Outside, I could hear two familiar voices arguing. I got out of bed, searching for my clothes till I remembered that I left them in the bathroom.
I had no other choice but leave the bedroom in Eric’s Shirt. At least it covered most of me.
As I opened the door, I didn’t expect Four to stand in the living room, yelling at Eric.
“Oh, finally! The princess decides to show her face!” Four glared at me, leaving Eric alone for once.
“What? How did you know I’m here?” I walked over to them and Eric passed me a cup of coffee. That’s when I noticed that my hand was perfectly fine now.
Silently thanking him, I waited for Four to continue. “I was watching the cameras yesterday and suddenly I see you entering Eric’s apartment. You didn’t come out again, so I thought I’d confront you today! I can’t believe that you would give yourself to him!”
“Give myself to him? He didn’t even see me naked. Yes, we slept in the same bed, but we didn’t sleep with each other.” I tried to explain to Four, but he obviously didn’t believe me.
“I don’t care what you did and what you didn’t. I just thought you were different.” Four turned to leave and the first time since I left the bedroom, Eric opened his mouth.
“Did you delete the tapes and disable the camera?” He took a sip of his coffee and looked at Four with raised eyebrows. “Do you think I’m dumb? Of course I did. As much as I hate you, I like her. Just, be more discrete from now on.” Four left me and Eric in the kitchen, sipping our coffee.
“You need to get ready. If anyone asks you were up early to visit Xavier in the infirmary.” He put his cup in the sink and walked back to his bedroom.
Huffing, I finished my coffee and placed my cup alongside his. To dress, I went to the bathroom and left as soon as I was ready. Eric was never good with mornings.

Taking Eric’s advice, I went to the infirmary, checking on Xavier, but when I got there, Xavier was just about to leave.
“My hero!” I hugged him, chuckling quietly. “Aww, that’s cute my damsel in distress!” I hit him.
Together we walked back to the dorms, where the others told us that we got the day off to do what we want. After Xavier and I shared a high five, we decided to go get some new clothes.
Together we stormed the giant store, each one picking outfits for the other.
I picked a tight, black tank top with matching trousers and a flannel shirt that faded from white to black. As accessories I picked a chain he could put on his trousers and a choker with spikes. The shoes looked like typical military boots.
We both got into the changing cabins, putting on whatever the other picked. In my case that meant a black tang top with black hot pants. Over that I had a loose black cardigan and some black necklaces. My shoes had the same military look as the ones I picked out for Xavier, but instead of black, they were bright red. Matching the wrist band he picked out.

Both of us left the cabins at the same time, grinning at each other. The only downside to this game was that neither one of us could afford those clothes. So we put them back and kept on window shopping. As we got to the tattoo parlour, I decided I want to get one. Xavier, who wasn’t too good with needles, said we would meet each other for dinner later.
Laughing at him I turned to search for a symbol I would like to have.
After thinking about it for a long time, I decided to get one with dreamcatchers that run down my spine.

The whole procedure took about one hour and it hurt like a bitch! I mean sure, I could’ve used this new technique they developed, but this, what I have on my back now, is a real tattoo. And I love it.
The tattoo lady explained everything about the healing process and the cream I have to put on it every day and let me go.
It was already dinner time when I was able to leave, but I decided to stop by the clothes store again. I used my last few points on a shirt, so that the others could see my tattoo.

I entered the cafeteria and immediately found Xavier, sitting at a table with Lucy. The talk they had yesterday seemed to have paid off.
After getting my food, I walked towards the table when Tyler walked in my way.
“Oh there you are! I searched for yesterday and somehow, you didn’t return to the dorm. I wonder where you were…maybe, screwing one of our leaders?” He smirked at me, his friends laughed. Well, two could play that game. “Aww, that’s so cute! You missed me so much you even looked for me all night! You stayed awake for me. That’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me!” I faked wiping away a tear. The attention of the room was on the two of us, even the leaders couldn’t help but to stare.
“Oh no, I didn’t miss you. I just wanted to see where you were. Nothing against that, huh?”
“So…now you admit to being my stalker?” I raised an eyebrow.
“No! What the! You little bitch!” Not even one second before Tyler lunged out to hit me, Max stood up and everyone halted in their movements.
“Initiates! After what happened yesterday I don’t think this the right time or the right place! You’ll have enough chances to fight in training! Sit down, or leave!”
I admit I didn’t listen to him on the first day, but right now, Max was a real cool guy with perfect timing.
I shot Tyler a grin and walked past him to where Xavier and Lucy waited for me.
“How was it? Getting a tattoo, I mean.” Xavier immediately started talking, as always.
I told him everything, hoping to be able to eat a meal in silence. And it was quiet. Well, as quiet as it can get with Xavier sitting beside you.

After dinner, the three of us walked back to the dorm. Lucy hasn’t talked about what had happened yesterday, but she was sorry. I knew that.
Since I had the honour to have the most comfortable shower just yesterday, and I didn’t want to get my tattoo wet, I waited on Xavier’s and my bed.
They soon were finished and joined me. We kept talking for a while, about our old faction, what we want to become after initiation and so on.
Still, when Xavier suddenly pulled a guitar from under his side of the bed, I couldn’t help my eyes widening in shock. “What is that?”
“A guitar.” He grinned at the guitar as if it was his baby. I just continued to stare at him. “Oh come on! I know you can sing! I heard you!” I couldn’t believe this guy! He listened to me while I was singing under the shower!
“You don’t even know how to you use this thing!” I turned away from him, but turned back as soon as I heard him play some familiar chords.
“Xavier! Stop! I’m not going to sing in front of all of the others!” My voice turned to a hiss.
“Why? I would quite enjoy it.” Lucy just now decided to chime in. Those guys…
Xavier repeated the chords and slowly, I began to sing.


Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHaIxSimdSs

The song and the video do NOT belong to me.

Oh hell, I’m stuck on my main nano thing. Let’s just…remember this? Okay, continuing in that style; warning: you won’t get that much out of this if you haven’t both read LotR (or at least watched it) AND watched Critical Role.

So, our story begins on Wilhand Trickfoot’s eleventy-first birthday, which happens to be his neice Pike’s thirty-third, and thus coming-of-age. To the excitement of all of the Shire who are invited, and all those who aren’t but will show up anyway (that is, the rest) there is to be a party of “special magnificence”…

The camera may pan first, however, to a simple cart trundling up the rode to Hobbiton. The cart is simple, but the man who drives it is not: skin naturally dark with tan, hair darker yet, woven with beads of gold, and purple robes worthy of a king—if, perhaps, a little worn with travel. And the contents of the cart! Simple brown boxes, yes, but the clever hobbit children already growing in a crowd, trailing behind, know what they hide. For they recognize the mark: a runic G.

“G for Gigantic!” they whisper not-so-quietly. “G for Grand!”

“I prefer ‘Glorious’” the man calls over his shoulder, or so he seems.

“What you are,” says another hobbit, “is late.” [the movies were very good, okay.]

She stands in a tree by a bend in the road, dark hair streaked with blue, hands on her hips, a little older than those trailing behind the cart. Just on the cusp of adulthood. It is, in fact, her birthday.

“A wizard is never late, Pike Trickfoot,” the glorious driver of the cart says sternly. But he cannot hide the laughter in his eyes. “Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.”

Pike Trickfoot does not bother to hide the laughter. She leaps as it bubbles out, without a care that she might miss the headboard and hit the fireworks instead. She does not, of course.

“Gilmore! It is good to see you again. Wilhand’s been worrying you wouldn’t make it.”

The Party happens. There are wonderful fireworks, including a raging white dragon. There is dancing, and singing—in no small part from Pike’s friend and companion Mr. Scanlan Shorthalt, just a few years older than she. Deft of finger and defter of wit, Scanlan was regarded as a bit of a rogue among the more proper Shirefolk, but always popular among the “wild” youth. And all agreed he could play the shawm as fine as you please, and a dab hand at lute and panpipes to boot. (For all that, Pike is ever-immune to his attempts to woo her, halfway earnest though they are.)

Wilhand gives a brilliant speech, and disappeared. He and Gilmore discussed old adventures, and older treasures. Pike gave chase, s far as Bag End, and inherited a ring. And, you know, Bag End. All of it. It was quite a lot. Really, what’s a single piece of jewelry to an entire household?


Ought I start the story again, some seventeen years later? When Pike has lived on in Bag End, in Hobbiton, with its rolling his and gentle wind nd sun; its happy, homely folk and their busy farms, rivaled only by their busy gossip…

The latest, I hear, is that Miss Sybil Cotton is with child, and will not tell whom the father is. Some wonder if she even knows. Others, who could be worth protecting. Hobbits, though overall kind, do love a good gossip.

Let’s skip some of the boring bits, shall we? Gilmore reappearing in the dead of night, slamming the doors and flinging Pike’s ring into the fire. Dark words in gold, twisted and burning. A danger. A doom. A plan.

So: preparation. Pike hints that Wilhand’s dragon gold is finally running out, and sells Bag End—dear Bag End, dear childhood home—to her cousin JB Trickfoot, who is by far the least troublesome of her less favorable relations. A timid lass, but not unkind, nor full of avarice (beyond, perhaps, for books, and a healthy, hobbitly affection for mushrooms.)

Scanlan accompanies her as far as her “new” home of Crickhollow, but here’s the thing: Scanlan is a bit of a rogue. At least, he is chronically curious, and nearly as clever as that, and always loves great tales and very rarely took no for an answer. So, that night Gilmore told Pike the legend of the One Ring? He my have been…listening. At the window. And the book Wilhand had been working on for years, the true story of his travels, which he never let anyone but Pike read? Scanlan may have…read that. Just a little. Just a glimpse! (He had to jump back out the window when he heard footsteps coming.)

Also, he does know Pike, and it is clear that she is not just preparing to move houses. She is too sad. And Pike does not get sad like a simple hobbit, with a good cry and some beer. She gets sad like an elf, wandering the hills and growing distant, almost ethereal when the light hits her just right. There has always been something odd about Pike Trickfoot.

Scanlan thinks of many things, as he lets his best friend lie to him (for a time.) He thinks of how he has always dreamed of being part of a story: a real one, an important one, far grander than the little tales and jokes he tells in the taverns each night. He thinks of how Pike, whom he does love, is going into danger surely too great for any lone hobbit, and that he would fain even the odds, however slightly. And he thinks, with some guilt, how he, Scanlan Shorthalt, is really very nervous of being in Hobbiton, or even the Shire at large, in…oh, nine months time. Eight, maybe. The longer the stay away, the safer, probably.


“I’m not staying here, Scanlan,” Pike says quietly. There is an urge to fidget with the ring on the chain round her neck, but she knows that is a bad idea, so she twists her fingers together instead. “I know I made a big to-do about moving here, but the truth is…”

“You’re going to Rivendell,” says Scanlan, and lifts a laden pack from among the luggage they’ve dumped on the floor. “Don’t worry, so am I.”

(Already they have hidden on the road from Black Riders, who left a chill in the air as they passed. But still Scanlan grins, if only because Pike looks like he has hit her with a croquet mallet.)

In the Forest, they are nearly buried alive by a curmudgeonly old willow, and get saved by a bizarre man who calls himself Matt Mercer, wears yellow galoshes and speaks only in song. His wife is the daughter of a ray of sunlight, with hair like flickering flames, and when he puts on the Ring he smiles and does not disappear. [Confession: when convincing people to read Lord of the Rings, I often give them permission to skip the Tom Bombadil chapters. Amazing worldbuilding, Tom and the barrow-wrights alike, but SO useless to the plot.]

Here is more sensical worldbuilding: he town of Bree is the only one in all Middle-Earth, so far as the writer(s) of this tale know, where hobbits and big men live side-by-side, with only as much strife as most neighbors have. The inn is bustling, and well-ready for folk of both sizes. Pike and Scanlan welcome the warm beds, and warmer company, as it was another dark, terrifying race to the ford. All nine Rides in pursuit, their voices fell, their dark hooves pounding and dark hands reaching, calling—something in Pike’s throat, or at least around it, calling back—

Now, the hobbits drink in peace, in the warmth of a fire and a crowded, happy inn. But a stranger sits in a dark corner, and Pike cannot help but glance their way from time to time.

“Oh, that’s a Ranger,” says the innkeeper, Laina, when Pike flags her down to ask (and for another mug of ale.) “Minxie, that one goes by. She’s alright.”

“’Alright’?” asks Pike.

“Well, they mostly keep to themselves, Rangers,” says Laina. “Strange folk. One time…”

Pike loses track of the innkeep’s anecdote, because Scanlan has clambered onto a table and begun to play songs many minutes ago. That is fine—they are trying to be incognito, but even the dark forces of the world could not stop Scanlan from preforming for an audience, and Pike loves him for it. What was not fine is that now he has started to tell tales, which mostly meant gossip—and that, with the event so recent, meant Wilhand’s mysterious disappearance at his own birthday party.

“Excuse me,” says Pike, and dashes over to vault onto the table beside him. She pitches her voice to carry. “Good folk of the Greyskull Keep! I must thank you for your hospitality! Rest assured, when I finish my book, Bree will be well-accounted for as a town most welcoming, and most bestowed—and bestowing!—with great food, and ale, and company!”

She raises her mug, toasting the now-cheering crowd.

“That said, I think it might be time my companion and I retired for night, for tomorrow will be another busy day of—”

Maybe someone jostles the table. Maybe a crowd of tipsy, sloppy cheers left too much ale for to slip on. Maybe Pike has had a mug too many herself, and has lost her usual balance.

Maybe darker forces conspire. As she falls, Pike’s hand goes to her pocket, and as she hits the floor (really a very little fall) her finger slips just so, and the world fills with fog. Voices and shapes all muffled, though they are all exclaiming.

Pike crawls frantically out of the crowd, to the nearest corner and secure table under which to hide, and yanks the Ring off her finger.

No sooner has she stowed it once more beneath her shirt, than a big man’s hand grabs her by the scruff of her shirt and yanks her up. A big woman’s actually—Pike finds herself staring up, in mute terror, at the mysterious Ranger. Her face is still in shadow, but Pike can see sharp eyes, and a sword at her belt.

“You are foolish, and not safe here even if you were wise,” says Minxie. “I will meet you in your room, and we will talk.”

Manhattan Mistress part 9


Pairing: Bucky x reader, Steve x reader, Tony x reader and OC!Casey (daughter of Y/N and Tony)

Summary: The devil may care what happens in Brooklyn, but the Manhattan Mistress has lost all her trust in Steve and is getting ready for battle. Song is “Shoot and run” by Josef Salvat.

Word count: 3.051

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of murder, death and rape. Please do not read belong the cut if you’re not comfortable with any of forementioned!

A/N: Dedicated to my favourite mob AU writer @caplanbuckybarnes. Enjoy sweetie!

Part 6: the white noise

Part 7: the waiting game

Part 8: the heathens

Disclaimer: I do not own this pic, credit goes to the rightful owner.

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The Only Exception - Part 9


Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: you don’t believe in romantic love, you find it pathetic. But maybe, you make an exception when you meet James ‘Bucky’ Barnes.

A/N: this is way longer than the other chapters, but it is a decisive moment for the reader, and for Bucky. I hope you enjoy it!

Tags: @supersoldierslover @barnesandnoble13 @vivianbabz @petals-overdaisies @damnbuckyishot @brazien @siobhanrebecca @shamvictoria11 @independentgirl @elwenia @flaipa

Originally posted by superhero-band-girl

(Credits to the owner of the gif)

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Trick the Past Again- An Akane Kurashiki Mix

“I’ll do whatever it takes to achieve my goals. That’s just the kind of person I am.”

Kidnapper, killer, time traveler, mastermind, scientist, conspiracy nut, cult leader, savior of humanity.  A mix for Akane Kurashiki.

1. A.A.A| Squalloscope//2. Uma Thurman| Fall Out Boy//3. Oh No!| Marina and the Diamonds//4. Cold War| Janelle Monae//5. Strings and Attractors| How to Destroy Angels//6. Just One Yesterday| Fall Out Boy ft. Foxes//7. Playing For Keeps| Elle King//8. Still Alive| Portal OST//9. Black Sheep| Metric//10. Castle| Halsey//11. I am not a Robot| Marina and the Diamonds//12. Soap| Melanie Martinez//13. Academia| Sia//14. Hope on Fire| Vienna Teng//15. Blindness| Metric

Play on Playmoss

Play on 8tracks

Play on Spotify

Basically my experiences with Zero Escape can be expressed with a “do it for her” graphic starring Akane Kurashiki. I adore her in all her complex, morally ambiguous, well-intentioned extremist, Machiavellian glory. So here’s my mix tribute to her, complete with the usual obsessively detailed annotations under the cut. 

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5. Part 2

I paused thinking “Jay, this photoshoot includes an interview?” I swear I thought it didn’t “you knew this” he said pointing, I swear I didn’t. Sitting back in the director’s chair “can you all give us a minute” I can’t do this, I can’t have an interview when I know what they will ask. I just don’t want it, Yusef rolled his eyes walking off “is something wrong?” Jay my manager asked me, he sat down on the chair at the side of me “something is very wrong, Adam and I have split. I am not with him, I never wanted to get engaged and I felt pressured, it’s over. I don’t want it to be bought up in the interview” Jay looked away in annoyance “I saw the tears in your eyes and I knew it was doomed” he said as he sighed out “put a statement out, on your Instagram now. I will let the interviewer ask you questions on the split, just a few ok? I will sort it out, just do that” he got up from the chair “thank you for telling me, finally” grabbing my phone from the side of me, I was going to use Adam as a cover up but why should I, I find it creepy he is still trying to claim me. He is even liking my pictures still, he sent me flowers to say sorry and I don’t like it. Staring down at the Pandora bracelet, I do not take this off at all. It makes me feel close to Chris, he is not around but he is. It was so hard to drive by him in the SUV, I wanted to hold him so bad.

I really didn’t know what picture to use so I just took a picture of the wall, I didn’t want to put a picture of Adam and I, Chris wouldn’t appreciate it at all. I won’t be mean in this ‘I like to be private, I like to keep things private in my life but this wasn’t so much. The whole world knows I am ‘engaged’ and honestly it was something I didn’t want, they say you find your soul mate and you just know but with Adam, I didn’t feel it. I decided to end that, maybe I am running from myself but I wish nothing but the best for Adam and thank you for all the good times we had’ I want to write more but if people really know me, if they know me that well they will see that my heart screams Chris, pressing send on my Instagram. I feel like a weight has been lifted, I needed to do that because I felt like Adam had a hold of me.

I feel so damn tired, photoshoot over and now I am doing this god forsaken interview “where do you see yourself five years down the line?” the interviewer asked, I paused smiling to myself “erm, married?” I said, but we both laughed “but I need a man for that of course, I just hope I find the right man. I just want to be loved, just like any girl. If I am thirty-five and not married with kids then you will see a very depressed bitch, oh god” I laughed at my own pain “but you’re so beautiful, I don’t see you having trouble?” she said in shock, I shrugged “clearly I am just not the girl or….” I drifted off “or my heart is somewhere else, I loved once. I just pray to god that I do become a mother and a wife, I don’t want to be married to this life. I want my own mini Robyn Rihanna Fenty, I want to show my daughter or son the world, I want to be a mother and if any man is willing then you know where I am. I want a baby too” I laughed, I think I am doing well playing this all off.

I am so very tired but also very excited about this surprise but I need to lose my team, they are literally not leaving me “what are we doing today?” Jen said, staring at Mel. I hate lying to Jen because that is my best friend and I am just lying to her “nothing, just going home” I lied, Mel shrugged at me. My phone screen lit up “who is cheesecake?” Jen questioned pointing at my screen “oh it’s just a friend” I have no idea what to say, that is Chris but I can’t say that “you have other friends? You hear this Mel!?” unlocking my phone to read the message “y’all dramatic” opening the message.

From: Chris

To: Robyn

How long? I am waiting, it’s already late

I feel like we are going to a club, it is very late and where else can we go. I am confused though “so what did cheesecake say?” I need to get rid of Jen “nothing, I am tired tonight anyways. I am going to bed” I do feel bad for lying but I cannot help it, replying back to his text.

To: Chris

From: Robyn

I am coming, I need to get dressed. How do I dress?

I never asked him at all “you both being so boring, honestly. I am going home” that is what I thought, now I can go and do my thing, seeing Chris has replied.

From: Chris

To: Robyn

Come to my home, nobody is here. Just Mijo and I, I got you an outfit. Come

I cooed out “he got me an outfit” I said a loud and then realised what I had just said “what was that?” Jen spat, my face dropped “Rorrey, he said he got me an outfit. I am going Barbados tomorrow” this lie is becoming deep for no reason, Mel looked at me disgust “well I want to see Monica, I will join” Jen is clocking me “great, see you tomorrow” I shrugged, I am not even going Barbados. “Bye bitches” Jen walked off, she knows something is going off and I feel bad. I breathed out placing my head in my hands “we both know you will be in his bed, you’re getting dick” lifting my head up “does this really mean I have to go?” I said, Mel shook her head “just say plans change, you’re Rihanna but you need to become better at lying. I hope she don’t come to the crib, you will be in his bed and we both know that” waving Mel off “you’re very concerned about my sex life, what about yours?” getting up from the chair “it’s great, now” I knew it, I just knew it “he has kids” picking my bag up “and I don’t, who cares, let’s just go” I am finally seeing Chris’ home which is exciting.

“This place looks very nice you know” Mel said looking around the area, it looks like a nice quiet place “have you not been here before?” the driver asked, these SUV drivers never talk but this one is “erm no” I said looking at Mel “you both don’t live far, I have come here before to drop Chris off” this guy talks too much “that’s nice” I shrugged, I look a mess and I am going to see Chris. I hate it because I wanted to look all pretty for him but no, shamefully he said to get ready there “this is the home here” seeing this very well-lit home just at the top of the hill, this is a nice place he has “shall I drop you off outside the house?” he asked a stupid question “yes please” why can’t he just do his job “did you get my makeup bag?” I asked Mel, I don’t remember if I did or not “this is Chris’ home, look at his cars everywhere” damn right it is, he loves his cars.

I cleaned the home before Robyn came here, I didn’t want her to come to a dirty home at all because then Robyn would judge me “I hope Mel got her legs out today” jumping off the kitchen counter “nigga, you thinking about Mel. I am thinking about Robyn, I am hoping to get my dick wet. Well not wet just want to lay the pipe, want to have sex with my baby. Doing it all night” touching my hair “well I am wanting it too” I hope I look good for my wife anyway “you already had sex with Mel?” turning around to Mijo, hearing the doorbell “well I want it again!” I am so excited, she is here to see me. I hope this is a surprise she likes, I mean she knows I am a little childish but it’s fun and I have spent a lot of money on this.

Pulling back the door “woah! Jesus Mel, don’t stand in the dark” holding my heart “nigga fuck you” opening the door wider seeing Robyn, smiling wide at her “hey?” I breathed out saying “hey Chris” Robyn said in a whisper, hugging Mel “I like your home though Chris” she walked in, Robyn is still stood here, why is she not coming in “this is so weird to me, coming to your home” nodding my head “I understand, I hope you come to my home more often” holding my hand out “I missed you so much Robz” Robyn placed her hand in mine, lightly pulling her inside my home “welcome to the home of Chris Brown” pushing the door shut “I missed you too Chris” wrapping my arms around Robyn “oh Chris” she held my shoulders, squeezing her close “I hate being so far away from you” inhaling sharply, she smells so sweet. Pressing a kiss to Robyn’ cheek “surprised you ain’t kissed my lips” she added, intertwining our fingers. Pulling Robyn into me, pressing a kiss to her lips “Chris, seriously. We will be late” rolling my eyes at Mijo “I guess you need to get dressed” pulling Robyn along, I hope she likes my home.

Smiling at Robyn as she looked around my living area “you like it then?” she is amazed “it’s so you Chris, I didn’t expect anything less. Even the car in the home” I chuckled “I erm got you a spot upstairs where you can get ready, come” waving them both over “oh yeah, you got me a dress? I am scared now, you still remember my size?” she said while I walked up the stairs “yeah I do babe, why wouldn’t I” Mel and Robyn both made their way up the stairs “are we going to your room?” Mel asked, shaking my head “y’all wish but only Robyn can see that, one day” walking to the room I put her things in, I got Munchie to help me but I picked it out “can I see the room now?” Robyn said “only if you giving me head?” I busted out laughing “I am playing, erm you can but it’s a mess” I don’t really want her too just because I haven’t cleaned it, opening the bedroom door “let me know if you like it, I will go downstairs and wait” I don’t want to see her reaction just because she may not like it, and then what.

Fixing my ring on my finger “you ready now or not?” Mijo asked in annoyance “why are you annoyed for, yes take it” Mijo and I busted out laughing “trust this song to come on now” Vybz Kartel – Romping Shop came on “she going to think you did it on purpose” shaking my head “just take the picture” I said to Mijo, he took the picture and passed me my phone “y’all planned this song didn’t you both?” Mel said laughing, where is Robyn “before you ask, she has just gone to the bathroom” looking down at my phone, uploading the picture to Instagram ‘Tonight is the night #OHB’ pressing send on the picture, walking over to Mel “you telling me you don’t like this song” walking behind Mel “don’t you bother, save that shit for Robyn” she pushed me away “when you come inna mi romping shop” I sang putting my phone in my pocket.

Robyn is finally here “did you stank out one of my toilets nasty ass!?” I shouted over the music “you took your time” she looks so beautiful in the blue miniskirt and completely unbuttoned shirt, that was supposed to be buttoned but I accept this “I was looking in your bedroom” my eyes widened “that is rude” I retorted “Mel did look but I dragged her back out, we just saw nothing” I don’t really have anything wrong in there I don’t think “we saw your condom draw” I do have that, thanks Mel “I am joking Chris!” Mel laughed at something so true “do you like the dress? I chose it, you made it look better and I like the open buttons” tilting my head to the side, I see side boob “she is making it easy for tonight” Mel said laughing “shut up” Robyn said “well I ain’t complaining, anyways can we just go. The driver is here” I want to get out of here already.

I was about to walk off but Robyn grabbed onto my wrist pulling me back “we will see you in the car” Robyn spoke, have I done something wrong now “is there something in your bedroom that you are hiding?” chewing onto my top lip “honestly” I said rubbing the side of my face “there is nothing, you can look in there. I just, I have had other women in there and I feel bad. Like I wouldn’t have you in there” Robyn let out an oh “I understand but we have both had other partners, no need to hide it. This is your home so who am I to judge” this is awkward “I just thought you had something way worse, like a whole girl hiding in there” shaking my head “nah, nothing like that. I never changed and this home is a constant reminder of the life I wanted, party and girls. You ain’t realise when I came to your crib, shit was like a breath of fresh air. I be having niggas and hoes come to this home like a revolving door, the only reason nobody is here now is because I said nobody will be home. Actually, even then they can come, this place is a mess. I have shit everywhere, I just be looking around and I remember everything that went on. I just feel bad because that room is just, a mess” I shrugged, Robyn is ever so silent “you have demons in this home Chris? You know my family don’t fuck with that shit, that is something you need to do, you need to help yourself because I can’t do it” she said “I know but I can’t, where am I going? Do you know where you are going? You’re going to New York, for now this is my home and I am just going to have to deal with it. I don’t know where we are or who we are, I am not even bringing you back here tonight” Robyn raised an eyebrow and I couldn’t help but laugh “I mean no, I don’t mean anything like that. Just, I don’t know. Look we will see ok? Friends can stay in the room together” turning around, she is judging me “sure they can” she looks so damn beautiful too, she is making me nervous, damn.

Making my way out of the home, I forgot the gift I got for Robyn so I had to go back into the home. I am not sure if Robyn is annoyed with me or not, I just want to be truthful with her but I be getting myself in trouble. Pulling open the SUV door “y’all switched seats again?” I am not sitting next to Mijo “we switching again, what is this? Robyn is supposed to be next to me” I refuse to get into the car “I told you this, they ganged up on me!” Mijo spat, shaking my head waiting for them to go back to the normal seating I arranged “fine” Robyn said making her way to the front with me “y’all keep fucking around, just Mijo sit in the back of the SUV so we can go” this why I know Robyn is annoyed with me, she switched seats.

Robyn frowned looking at me “we are flying?” she said confused “yeah, it’s quicker to get there” the SUV stopped outside the jet “who knows where we are going? Mel?” Robyn turned to look at her “I have no idea bitch, I am just as clueless” Robyn looked at me “it’s the middle of the night, where are we going” getting out of the SUV “you will see, it’s less than an hour to get there. The only thing, you cannot look out of the windows. They are covered, when you get off the jet you will be blindfolded” Robyn stared at me “do you trust me?” I don’t think she does “I do but like, I am nervous” holding my hand out to her, she took my hand “I am just so confused by this, what could you be possibly be doing” I shrugged helping her down, she need to hide her breasts because I cannot deal “so are we staying wherever we are?” she asked “yes we will, don’t worry about clothes” if we drove then we would never get there and that is pointless.

Mel keep giving me a nervous smile and I don’t know why “why are you nervous? You think Mijo and I are kidnapping you?” Mijo laughed which made me laugh also “you know what, we actually could be doing that. Did you tell anybody about this?” Mijo said glaring at both Robyn and Mel “no nigga, I swear to god Robyn will kill you both” Mel pointed at us both “you two would be the last people I would kidnap, y’all would drive me crazy” that is the damn truth “we will be landing” the flight attendant added “ok great, so Robyn. Blindfold” I held it out, she really thought I was joking about this “my makeup will get a mess Chris, no” letting out an oh “well then nobody will be getting off this jet, we might as well go back, I have seen you look worse” she snatched the blindfold from me “just because it will shut you up” I knew I would get my own way.

The jet came to a halt finally “have you stared enough at my friends boobs?” dragging my eyes away from Robyn’ side boob, I can actually see her nipple from here “is he doing that?” Robyn asked, she can’t see shit “ignore her, shut up Mel!” I spat, Mel grinned at me “I caught your ass negro, you enjoyed the view” getting up from the seat “seeing as Robyn doesn’t trust me, please help her down” she clearly doesn’t, walking by her “I do! Why are you saying this?” Robyn perked up saying “uhm Robz he walked off, he is not sat there” rolling my eyes “oh but why? I do trust him, Chris. Stop being like that” getting off the jet, let her argue with the empty seat.

I can’t stop laughing at Robyn being blindfolded “this is so kinky” I couldn’t help but say it “I swear, I hate you. Why do I need to do this” watching Robyn move her hand to the side trying to touch my leg, she finally found my knee “because I want it to be a surprise, I think you will be very surprised when you see, trust me I have spent a lot of money. You will see why and this is only for you” smiling wide, we are here “seriously?” Mel said, Mijo shushed her “how?” I shrugged, we are finally here at Disneyland, I paid a lot of money for this because of the staff and them having to keep part of the place open for me. We have like four hours we can be here, just us and the staff. It’s going to be lit, I can’t believe I made it happen. Opening the car door “shuffle over to me baby” she touched the seat at the side of her “this is so weird Chris” she said smiling “I know it is, come babe” she keeps on smiling so wide, she is excited deep down.

“How much walking are we doing” Robyn complained, we are actually here inside the building. Looking at Mel she looks so impressed, I am more excited seeing Mickey myself, that is my nigga “ok, are we inside then?” stepping back from Robyn, if she don’t get excited about this then she is boring because I am “uh yeah, you can look” I got like every character here for her birthday, I don’t care how old you are these are the ones “don’t scare me” Mel and Mijo stood at the side of me, they decorated the Cinderella castle nice. I did pay well. Robyn slowly pulled off the blindfold off, squinting her eyes. Mickey and Minnie both held either side of the banner saying Happy Birthday as Robyn jumped at the sound of confetti falling “oh my god! What!?” she spat looking around “oh my god, what is this?” she placed her hand over her mouth “you hired this for me? Only us” Goofy walked over to Robyn and placed a crown on her head “this is actually so amazing Chris, how the hell you pull this off?” I shrugged not saying a word.

Robyn rushed over to me and hugged me tight “thank you so much, this is so beautiful. How? You got them to open this for me?” getting the charm out from my pocket “this is to add to your bracelet, remember I said I will fill all of this. Well I am starting, I got this made. It’s Minnie” Robyn placed her hand over her heart “oh my baby, oh my god Chris” she took off her Pandora bracelet “you thought it through, I feel so emotional” she passed me her bracelet “of course I did baby, we get to be us in this place, nobody knows. And look” turning around “this is all for you” Robyn wrapped her arms around my arm “this is so cute! Who the hell hires Disneyland? I am shocked, this must have cost you” holding out the bracelet “it’s whatever” I shrugged “we can go on rides without people knowing” feeling Robyn press a kiss to my cheek.

Robyn looked around the scenery “I am just in shock Chris, you really went all out for my birthday. This is something I will never forget” it looks so dope, the whole place being lit up with nobody here but us on this Ferris wheel. Robyn shuffled over to me, placing my arm over her shoulder “the world knows I am not with Adam anymore, I am just single. In my heart, I am taken though” she looked at me “really by who?” I said acting dumb “the love of my life, a guy that has a heart of gold. Some goofy nigga from VA” she rested her head on my chest “that goofy nigga from VA wants to date you” pressing a kiss to the back of her head “I want to date him too” I have another surprise for her “that’s official then, I am so stupid Robyn. We belong together but yet we ran away from each other, we are so stupid” we really are stupid “well I am stupid” let me rephrase that.

Robyn sat across me eating, she is loving the food and I know it’s late at night but we were hungry. Mel and Mijo did their own thing and sat away from us “you’re drinking enough” I mentioned, she has got issues with that. Smiling at Minnie behind Robyn “what’s funny?” she asked so I pointed behind her, she turned around seeing the sign Minnie is holding “let the fairy tale begin” she read aloud “what does that mean” she turned back around to me and Mickey stood right next to her “woah!” she spat in shock, he placed his hand over his mouth. Licking my lips taking in a deep breath. He bought his hand out from behind him and placed it in front of Robyn, Minnie rushed to the side of Mickey “say yes?” Robyn said staring at me all wide eyed, getting up from the chair “I let another man propose to you, I let another man try and claim you and I will never allow that to happen again. He didn’t know you the way I do, I don’t want nobody else but you. I know we are just starting again and we can still do that” taking the ring from Mickey’s hand, getting down on one knee “you the only man I wanted to marry” Robyn choked out “I fucked up, I am sorry. Please don’t cry” licking my lips feeling so bad “I don’t even want you to ask me, I say yes. I want to marry you Chris” she spat, she didn’t even let me put the ring on her finger she grabbed my face kissing my lips “yes my nigga!” Mijo half shouted clapping.

Smiling at Robyn ahead of me, she showed off her ring to Mel again “I can’t believe how big this ring is Chris, wow!” Mel complimented “this is what I wanted to see, this is the smile, when I saw your face that night. I knew you didn’t want it, look at my girl. She is engaged” Mel gushed “thirsty and engaged now, no depression from you. You about to get dick too, life came at you fast” laughing aloud at Mel “we need a picture though, this is going to be some lowkey shit” Mel held her phone up “come, let’s get a selfie” coming up from behind Robyn, wrapping my arm around her shoulder. She held her hand up to show off the ring off “this makes me sad, I can’t post it but when I can I will” pressing my body up behind Robyn “stawp!” humping the back of her “you ass” moving back from Robyn laughing.

Looking down at my watch “you’re engaged to me now, I know we have to keep shit quiet but I am always there for you in your heart. Shit is going to be the biggest test for us, time is so precious” holding Robyn’ hand between my hands “I can’t stop looking at my friend, she is glowing. True happiness” Mel beamed “because I got engaged to the man I want, the man I craved. I just feel like I am on cloud nine, I am going to get some dick too” Robyn openly said “I swear to god Chris if you fall asleep on me” she pointed at me “Mijo, you hear what happened. This nigga fell asleep on me during Netflix and chill, I had my legs out and everything. The movie barely came on, I look and he fell asleep” rubbing the side of my face smiling “look, I was tired and I didn’t want to be disrespectful, how did I know she wanted the D?” I defended myself, feeling a slap on the back of my head “how did you not know? That is a damn lie, you knew” I shrugged smiling at Robyn “are you happy?” she asked me “yeah I am, I am just thinking on when we will get to see each other again and all that” I keep on thinking she will get too busy for me, smiling at Robyn “this is a big fuck you to that guy, Adam thinking he could marry the love of my life. Fuck him” shaking my head, he tried though.

Leaning over the reception counter “yeah, Chris Brown” I flinched, reaching down grabbing Robyn’ wrist, looking over at her “stop it” I said smiling “great, your room is ready” he placed the key card on the desk, moving my hand away from Robyn’ wrist and grabbing the key card. Robyn went straight back to rubbing my crotch “you’re so fucking bad” I said in a whisper “I will have a suitcase coming in the morning” I paused, Robyn really is making me hard “send them to my room, thanks” moving back “I will do sir” shaking my head at her “you’re a mess, come” she looked down at my bulge “I can’t wait to have you, it’s been so long” placing my arm around Robyn, pulling her closer to me, the lobby is dead “it’s like me doing this” slipping my hand under her unbuttoned shirt, touching her breast “that feels so good” she bit her bottom lip, moving my hand away “wait till we get in that room ma’am” she going to get some tonight.

anonymous asked:

Hey, so I just found your blog and I think it's fantastic! I'm a huge Ryden shipper since their beginning but I kinda got lost in their history a while ago and so, seeing your blog and your amazing knowledge of this ship, I was wondering if you could maybe write a Ryden history from the beginning? Like, you can write as little or as much as possible with details and links and sources or not? Up to you,but I'd kinda really wanna know what happened and expecially understand why the split happened?

*cracks knuckles*

*cracks wrists*

*cracks arms*

*cracks spine*

*drinks some whiskey*

Yeah, why the hell not?

Buckle up kids: this is gonna be a long ride

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Dancing in Starlight

Pairing: Thranduil/Reader

Summary: One year has passed since the battle of the five armies and it is once again the Feast of Starlight. Your friends have attempted to lift your spirit with wine and festivities, but it may have some unintended consequences.

Warning: Use of alcohol and embarrassment.

One full year had passed since the battle at the Lonely Mountain and once again you were celebrating the Feast of Starlight. You had been there, albeit not in active combat. You were a trained healer for the Guard and had manned a tent to help the wounded. You would never admit it to your friends, but the sights had affected you deeply. The light of elves was never meant to be diminished and you saw so many lights put out.

That was why your friends had dragged you to this blasted festival when you had absolutely no desire to celebrate. The stars simply reminded you of all the lives you couldn’t save. But they had insisted and reminded you that your King expected everyone to attend with not so subtle smirks. So you let them.

You wore a simple gown of silver silk that fastened in a halter behind your neck. The dress was backless, save for a strand of jewels that ran across the midline of your back, holding the fabric taut against your breasts to preserve your modesty. You pulled your hair to one side and pinned it in place with crystal accents and crowned your head with a simple silver circlet.

It will do.

You met your friends in the massive ballroom and immediately helped yourself to a goblet of wine…It would help to dull your senses to the roar of the party. And by Elbereth, it was a party. Elves occupied nearly every inch of the provided space, music filled the hall, and the laughs and shouts of your kin pounded in your ears. It was all too much. You quickly downed your wine and reached for another.

A low wolf whistle reached your ears. “Elo, Y/N! You look incredible!”

You smiled coyly into your wine as you turned to your friend Thalion, a member of the Guard. “Mae g’ovannen mellon nin. Hannon le.”

“May I have this dance?” He asked as he bowed low.

You clearly hesitated. You definitely were not good on your feet and were simply in no mood to dance.

“Come on, Y/N. You wouldn’t hesitate if I were the great King!” He taunted you jovially with his standard shit-eating-grin. It seemed everybody knew of the reverence you held for your royal leader.

Never one to accept such a jibe, you tossed back your wine and accepted his hand. You let him escort you to the dance floor as a traditional elvish dance began to play. Many other pairs joined you on the floor. Unfortunately, you could already feel the wine going to your head. As the song began, your feet felt sluggish to follow your command. Before you knew it, you were spun into the arms of another partner. This ellon was much better at leading you and soon you felt a smile light your face. You were finally starting to enjoy yourself. You had passed through three more partners and you felt the song coming to a close…unfortunately not on a very graceful note. As you were twirled into the awaiting arms of your final partner, you drunkenly tripped over your own two feet and collided hard with his solid chest, toppling the two of you.

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First Kiss ~ A Liam Dunbar Imagine

Request: can you do a liam imagine where he teaches you how to kiss because you haven’t had you’re first kiss and you’re going on a date and then he gets jealous idk

A/N: Sorry this took so long school has been bleh and its been making me feel a it bleh sorry for any typos!. However I do hope that you enjoy this 😚☺️

Word Count : 1900


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Based from the song Don’t Comeback - Heize (feat. Junhyung) 


 BTS Rap Monster/ Kim Namjoon and You 

 Fanfic | One Shot | Part 1

Summary: A moving-on song you composed from your break up from Namjoon

 the feel is everything from the song it’s self 

 “Hey Y/N, so apparently that song Heize just released was from you huh?”

 “Huh? What?” you were too focused on some beat you’re arranging on the computer. 

 “Yah, stop it. I’m ordering you to stop. You haven’t even had lunch yet, here eat this kimbap” 

 You felt your stomach grumbling. You moved away your rolling chair away from your composing devices and took a break. 

 You’re a rookie female composer training at AOMG under Gray’s supervision from a year now after you left BigHit. You’ve been composing and making lyrics in the industry 4 years from now and you’ve made a couple of good lyrics. In the hip hop composing scene you’re considered as a rising rookie with your amazing skills and big names actually acknowledged and know who you are. 

 Yes, you excelled in your professional life BUT worst in your love life. 

 As you eat, Gray continued the topic. 

 “So have you heard it yet?’ 

 “What song?” 

 “Ughhh..Don’t Comeback is the title. Yah, are you that busy you can’t keep track of your works? She said you composed and gave it to her.” 

 Don’t Comeback was the only thing that echoes in your head. You felt some shivers, then you shook them. 

 “Oh? Ugh maybe. Haha. You know how busy I am,” you replied keeping your calm. But you wanted to forget everything about that lyrics. 

 “You’re always overworking yourself and no ones even rushing you. Stop stressing yourself, y/n. Ow, I remember, theirs a launch party later you should come. Have some fun, you deserve it,” 

You actually don’t like crowded places and strangers but because the hip hop scene tend to have clubbing events and parties sometimes you’re pulled to go. But in some occasions, you’d go to have a drink not to have fun but to avoid the unbearable lonely nights. You either get so drunk you pass out or you drown yourself to someone and regret it the next day. At parties or not it has been worse ever since. Ever since that one rainy night. 


 “Keuman haja. Let’s stop it” you said 

 Rain is pouring heavily outside but the atmosphere inside the car is as heavy. You and Namjoon felt more than suffocating. 

 He just sat still. His usual smart objectives in things doesn’t work as his emotions flood his mind and body. And its more than aching. 

 “We both know we’re not going anywhere and we have to have a normal relationship not like this everytime, I’m tired Joon..” 

 You are right. And he knew well too 

 You’ve started to get fond of Namjoon when Zico introduced you to him. And because you’re the closest age as him, you became best buddies with him. Instead of a very romantic relationship with him, you and Namjoon are like the perfect partners. You two are complete opposite but you blend so well. Namjoon is a sexy rap genius, you are a sweet melody hiphop prodigy. Namjoon is clumsy and messy while you’re neat and organized. You also both have matching taste in fashion. Although Namjoon seem to dress more since he’s an artist. You wear grunge but clean. Even the music genre people around you approved of you. You started as an intern to one of BigHits composer so you worked with BTS. You composed together, played together, hangout together, dork together, get in trouble together - you we’re inseparable. And then naturally you both fell inlove like all the pieces have fallen into the right places. 

 “I’ll talk to Bang PD,” was all he could say 

 You smiled a little, “Don’t” a tear fell silently on your left eye. 


 So your tears keep flowing as you faced him. “It’s nonsense Joon you know its not going anywhere. Soon enough we’re going to break up why not just end it simply and let’s move on while everything’s whole?” 

 “Whole?? You’re breaking me into pieces everytime. We’ve passed through those dispatch pictures before. Second time is whatever. We know what to do. I don’t fucking care about the comments whatever bullshit they say. We’ve recovered from it before, we can do it again! Please baby..” 

 You met, you became friends, you got close and then you fell inlove. All pretty things –NO- it does not end there. Being inlove is not eveything. Reality strikes. You’re just a rookie composer and he was Rap Monster – the leader of one of the most popular groups in KPOP now. And the ravenous media are always hungry. 

 A year ago you two were caught cuddling at a bar with drinks. Namjoon suffered a lot of dirty stuffs from that single picture. He’d been into a lot of harsh headlines such as “Destructed by fame – drinking, clubbing with different girls” He had to take a break for 4 months until they cleared things out. No one suspected your relationship but the destruction to everything from that scandal felt heavy in your hands. You tried to break up with him that time also but you came together again as you can’t avoid him when you were working with BigHit before. But now, you seem to have enough. 

 “This time is a huge blow Joon! You punched someone!” 

“To protect you from an asshole!”

“That’s why…I can’t do this anymore..Joon, you keep getting in trouble because of me. I may not be harmed but it pains me that you’re getting dragged down because of me” you wept more.

 “then I’ll-“ 

 “Stop it Joon please let’s just stop it! It’s been a month since it broke out. And things are still not progressing well for you. My guilt won’t let me continue this. All because of this, now you can’t go anywhere, no shows no invites, fan clubs are closing and you’re being as reckless as ever. Please wake up to your senses Namjoon you’re supposed to smarter than me.” 

 He held your face and look it to your eyes and wiped you tears as his kept flowing “I only know I love you now..”

 You can actually see through his eyes everything he is, you can’t help but cry, “As much as I love you, we have to stop this to survive in this ruthless industry. It’s the only way Joon. I love you so I’m letting you go,” 

Pain devoured you’re body as you gave him your last kiss. 

 “Goodbye Joon,” 

 And you left that car and walked through that rain cold as you, 

 *end of flashback 

 You walk through the Han River tonight as your usual. Just to breathe, 

 You sat in your usual spot. 

A sweet melody with a beat suddenly starts from the speaker around the Han River area. 

 When it rains I still look for you along while making the raindrops my beat 

 I’m not ok, not even tomorrow 

 It’s obvious that longing will wake me up, not my alarm 

 I want to hug you and hold onto you, who was once mine 

 I want to see myself in your twinkling eyes 

 I’m living in regret after letting you go 

If you ever hear this song Please just listen and forget about it 

 Goosebumps felt all over you. 

This is your lyrics you gave Heize 6 months ago, 

Don’t come back to me 

Don’t look at me, just pass me by 

Because you have to be happy 

Be happy with someone who resembles you 

Ok, this is a song that longs for you 

But don’t misunderstand 

Cuz this isn’t a song to make you come back 

I’ll be honest, I wanna go back 

Everything is still in my phone 

But now I know 

She’s better for you than me 

 Some things crushing your heart 

 Don’t fool yourself I’m just something you can use in your lyrics 

I’m nothing to you 

This song won’t even last 4 minutes 

And our love wasn’t small enough to fit in it 

Just tell me to piss off so I can easily understand 

I don’t understand things like “this breakup is for you” 

If that’s not it, then stop this song immediately 

And come hug me like nothing happened 

 You felt him said those to you and you wish 

Don’t come back to me 

Don’t look at me, just pass me by 

Because you have to be happy 

Be happy with someone who resembles you 

If I ever call you If I’m ever waiting for you in front of your house 

Turn off your phone on rainy days 

It’ll just be for a moment, it’s all a show 

Don’t get weak and think carefully 

ou struggled because of my selfish ways 

Even when you were out with your friends 

You were too nice and always had to worry about me 

You don’t deserve to be unhappy 

I’m not confident to be a good person like you 

So there’s no other way but to let you go 

I don’t expect you to understand 

 Don’t turn away like this 

 How can I be happy with someone that’s not you? 

 I have to be happy 

 So I need you, I need you 

 The song ended and you failed to keep your eyes dry and you felt every pain again. 

And he did find another girl. An awesome girl you could never compete with. APink’s Eunji. Nothing more to say – she’s Eunji, not just talented and pretty but a kind woman with a very cool personality.

6 months ago, pictures of Namjoon and her at a café looking at each other lovingly and wholesomely spread out and took the showbiz in storm. Because of Namjoon’s scandal’s before netizens were protective of Eunji but then Eunji gave an statement in an interview that made everyone approved of them. They even say that because of Eunji, Rapmon regained his reputation back. Now they are on of the hot couples in the Kpop scene.

You couldn’t agree more. Although it hurts you a lot that he’s finally with someone you think its what’s best for him. You thought that’s what you wished for him. While he’s finally in a good situation you on the hand has never been wrecked before. You didn’t just felt broken. It was like you lost half of your soul,

So you write a final song and promised that after it you’ll focus on work hardly so you can move on too. Heize was your friend and you decided to just gave it her. She knows your story too. But you didn’t know she would actually promote it as a single. You actually forgot about it until now.  

And now all the pain is coming back.

 “so you’re still regretting everything I see” came a voice from behind 

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3

 Hi I’m Lyn! 

A huge South Korea Fan! Not just Kpop but the whole S.Korea really 😍 

I’ll be continuing this story with another song so please wait for it

Rebloggs and give hearts-juseyo 😁 

 Sorry for the lack of organization right now. 

I just totally got excited and immediately made an account then post it right away. But I’ll pretty up and organize my blog soon. 

This blog is dedicated to anything kpop and fanfics based in songs 😀 

Let’s go fans! Let’s keep being well fed kpop healthy 😁

Unexpected |3|

Originally posted by got7gifs

A/N: Hey, JYP. JB+Tight shirts… make it happen, now. But I seriously can not believe all of the love you guys show this series. Ahaha, thank you, so much!

Part |1| |2| |3| |4| |5| |6| |7| |8| |8.5*SMUT*| |9| |10|

You take a deep breath and blink slowly, making your irritation apparent. You squeeze your forehead with your left hand and try to answer, but a thought pops into your head.  

Why can’t you call one of your members?” you ask, holding your hand out to him as if you just came up with a genius idea.

Keep reading

mad-madam-m  asked:

Carrie, light of my life, do you have any Sterek proposal fic recs?

i do!  ❤

  • Through The Fire (Come What May) by Jerakeen (T, 2k)  “You ran back into a burning house because you had to get something.”
  • untitled by felicitysmock (Not Rated, 5k) The video’s everywhere. Stiles barely remembers having his phone on him, let alone making sure he recorded the whole beautiful, drunken proposal. And, it is beautiful. 
  • untitled by blacktofade (Not Rated, 2k)  Derek’s stomach drops. It sounds like Stiles is trying to break up with him.
  • (if you like it) put a ring on it by Rena (T, 2k Stiles takes a deep breath and then blurts, “I’m gonna marry Derek.”
  • untitled by felicitysmock (Not Rated, 3k)  Stiles and Derek sort of fall into dating. There’s a kiss. It was an accidental sort of kiss, too.
  • untitled by raisesomehale (Not Rated, 1k) “This is without a doubt the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in.”
  • The Proposal by Firenation (E, 18k) Stiles Stilinski is the long-suffering assistant of Derek Hale, editor extraordinaire. Also jackass extraordinaire. The Proposal AU where Stiles has to get engaged to his terrifying boss Derek in order to prevent him being deported. And somehow has to persuade his family that they’re really in a relationship (stop laughing, Scott). Difficult doesn’t even cover it.
  • the one where no one proposes by allyasavedtheday (Not Rated, 1k) “Dude!” Stiles says urgently as soon as Scott picks up. “Derek has a ring.” “You proposed already?” Scott asks excitedly, misunderstanding. “No, I mean I found a ring in his sock drawer. He’s going to propose.” “That’s good though, right?” Scott says. “That means you know he won’t say no.”“ But I’m the one who’s supposed to propose,” Stiles whines. “I even asked Lydia for help. Lydia.”
  • The Proposal(s) by theroguesgambit (T, 2k) At the honeymoon resort, someone makes the mistake of asking for the proposal story. It’s meant innocently enough, the type of thing most couples are more than happy to gush about. Stiles snorts into his glass and Derek’s eyes narrow. He makes a pointed noise that’s probably meant as warning, but Stiles just puts down the glass and leans across the table, smirking. “Which one would you like? We’ve got two hundred and fourteen of them.”
  • Today and Everyday by oncetherewasapirate (T, 8k) Or: Five Times Derek Tries to Propose (and the One Time He Does) After six years together, Derek feels like it’s the right time to propose. The Universe, however, has other plans.
  • all we are by trilliastra (G, 1k) Stiles makes fun of them all the time, says it feels weird knowing that his dad and his boyfriend share secrets about him, but Derek can see right through his lie. “Yeah.” Derek says distractedly, playing with the bottle in his hand. “I want to marry him.” He blurts out. John freezes, eyes widening in surprise as he places his bottle on the table carefully.
  • untitled by runwiththisdinosaur (Not Rated, <1k) Here’s the thing: Stiles doesn’t want to get married. At least, he’s never mentioned it and Stiles mentions everything. Derek figures he’s safe in assuming that if the guy who’s mentioned Derek’s shoe and sock combinations almost daily for the three years they’ve been living together hasn’t mentioned marriage, even in passing, he’s not interested.
  • Still Frames In Your Mind by elisera (E, 16k)  Stiles meets Derek in Prague the morning of his seventeenth birthday. He’s hungover as fuck, and looking like it, too.
  • untitled by felicitysmock (Not Rated, 2k) “Is that supposed to say marry?” Derek clenches his jaw, nods curtly as he continues to ice the dark chocolate Easter egg. 
  • It Hurts (But It’s Worth It For You) by tryslora (T, 1k)  Stiles hates needles. No, Stiles really hates needles. But tattoos mean something, and this is more than he can say with words.
  • Slight Confusion, More Joy (Stiles and Derek Celebrate The News) by petals42 (Not Rated, 1k) “WE CAN GET MARRIED TODAY!” Stiles yells, bouncing Derek a bit more.“Okay,” Derek agrees. It’s only been four months but he and Stiles had been friends for years before getting together and they’ve already said “I love you.” Derek already knows Stiles is it for him. If there’s some reason why Stiles wants to get married today, then Derek will do that. He’ll do anything Stiles wants
  • Hale and Hearty by khaesel (E, 60k)  It starts out innocently enough, with a drive to celebrate surviving yet another lethal creature who took up residence in Beacon Hills. Somehow, it ends up including marriage licenses and a giant hotel room, despite both Derek and Stiles being single. But what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Doesn’t it?
  • The One With The Gazebo by mikkimouse (T, 1k)  Stiles and Derek are on vacation, and Derek has a little surprise up his sleeve.
  • The Many Ways To Propose by literaryoblivion (T, <1k) Now that Stiles is here, at the restaurant, on Valentine’s day, surrounded by lovey-dovey couples, he’s kind of rethinking his plan.There’s already been two couples that have gotten engaged, and he and Derek haven’t even gotten through the first course yet.
  • untitled by pantstomatch (Not Rated, 2k)  He’s a badass werewolf, he can totally tell Stiles that they accidentally got werewolf married because—because Stiles was thinking about him, and happened to give him a token of his, uh, affection under the silvery light of the last full moon. Platonic affection, Derek thinks sourly, so he doesn’t get why he feels all warm and fuzzy and bonded all of a sudden.
  • Laugh About It by clawstoagunfight (G, 3k)  It’s three AM. Stiles is drunk and dancing around in his underwear, singing at the top of his lungs, when someone knocks on his door.
  • Reason The Sun Shines Down by GotTheSilver (M, 2k)  Stiles knew that proposing to Derek was never going to be easy.
  • Nothing Says ‘I Love You’ Like Dead Animals On The Porch by dedougal (T, 1k)  When his dad finds the dead squirrel on the porch, Stiles still doesn’t know what to make of it.
  • Nose Goes by oncetherewasapirate (G, 1k)  Things you said that I wasn’t meant to hear.
  • flawless by bibliosexuall (Not Rated, 4k) It takes a whole four minutes for the song to end. It’s one of her quieter songs, one that doesn’t get a lot of air time. It’s not that bad, he supposes. A little twangier than he likes, a little more saccharine, but–pleasant. Like a lullaby. What makes it annoying is Stiles sitting over there crooning at the stereo and making heart eyes. No song–or singer–is that good. Stiles sighs contentedly into the last notes and wriggles his butt against the seat. “I know you and I are, like, werewolf-married, but dude, if I ever met Lydia Martin in person … All bets are off, is all I’m saying.“
  • untitled by theshhtiger (Not Rated, <1k)  It was breakfast. Of course, since it was in the morning, that was why he messed up.
  • holy matrimony by hales-republic (E, 3k)  It’s embarrassing how long it takes Derek to form a strategy on the matter.
  • untitled by pale-silver-comb (Not Rated, 2k)  Stiles isn’t really surprised the day he chooses to propose is the day a witch coven decide to move into Beacon Hills and kidnap him.
  • untitled by iddaynight (Not Rated, 2k) “You’re my person,” Derek tells him honestly, “All that stuff… you’re my person, I guess.” “Noooo,” Stiles moans, “it doesn’t count! Everybody else gets to kiss their person.”“Right,” Derek says stiffly. “And you don’t want to kiss me.”
  • untitled by felicitysmock (Not Rated, 3k) Derek’s face has gone crimson but he lifts an eyebrow, lips twitching, “Yeah, so?” “So, nothin’, was just remindin’ you of how we got together, because of you needing me. You may as well marry me, tomorrow.” “Okay,” Derek replies unflinchingly, just as the waitress comes over to collect the check.  
  • untitled by haletostilinski (Not Rated, 1k)  “Well what is it, babe?” Stiles huffed. He felt like they’d been walking through the house forever, although it had only been about 30 seconds since Stiles came through the door after a double shift at the station and Derek ran up to him, immediately covering his eyes. Stiles had thought Derek was trying to initiate sexy times - which Stiles was always up (pun intended) for - but that thought had quickly been dashed when Derek whispered in his ear that he had a surprise for Stiles.
  • untitled by mad-madam-m (Not Rated, 1k) “You,” Derek lowered his head to run his nose along Stiles’s cheek, “are infuriating.” Stiles rocked his hips up into Derek’s and grinned. “Yeah, but you love me anyway.”
The One With The Scrabble

Rating: T

Word Count: 2,879

This next part of the Tayvin Friends Series is a little late, and I apologize. But I also would like to announce that there will be three more after this, leading all the way up to the six-month mark of August. Stay tuned…

Keep reading

I Hate U I Love U - Calum Part 2:

Hey guys,

so sorry that i’m posting this later then planned, my internet sucks

Anyway here’s part 2 for this Calum imagine, sorry I haven’t been posting lately I’ve been really busy with school stuff but I’ll try to write more I promise. Anyway this isn’t as good as I’d hoped because there was a lot I wanted to fit in but let me know what you think and if you want a part 3 or want to request something else

Anyway please enjoy

Love Audrey x

Part 1

Y/N=Your Name

Y/BF/N=Your Best Friend’s Name

I do not own this song, 5sos, Halsey, The 1975 or any of these gifs

It had been two weeks since Calum told me about his girlfriend and they were already inseparable. Spending every minute with each other, holding hands down the street, meeting fans together… all the things that we used to do. She was flawless, perfect hair, body, smile, perfect everything, the girl that he deserves. His fans were amazing, a lot of them sending me messages asking if I was okay or if we’d had a fight and that they still ship us together which made me smile. I can’t complain she’d been nothing but nice to me on the few short occasions we’d met and Cal still called me most nights to see how I was going. I always gave him the same response, the response that he wants to hear and then he we go on about their latest adventures. I was excited though, because one night we had planned to spend a whole day together doing all the things we used to do before he went back on tour, just the two of us. It was also perfectly timed that my birthday was the next day so that’s probably why he mentioned it. I decided that it was the perfect time to tell him how I felt and to show him the song that I’d written.

Moments before he was meant to pick me up, I was beyond nervous. My chest felt heavy and I felt like I couldn’t breath, but then I thought about Cal and his stupidly perfect smile and I could calm down. I drummed my fingers on my kitchen bench and stared at my phone, waiting for it to ring. When it did I answered straight away “hello?” I asked excitedly “Hey, Y/N, it’s me” he said plainly. “Hey Cal, are you here yet?” I say tilting my head to the right “Actually, that’s what I’m ringing about” he paused and I held my breath “You see, being the lousy boyfriend I am, I forgot that it will be my girlfriend’s birthday in a few months into the tour and I probably won’t be able to see her. So I can’t just not do anything for her birthday right? So to make up for it, she asked me to take her shopping today. So I can’t make it today, is that okay?” he asked like a little kid who knew that they were going to get into trouble. I wanted to scream, it was not okay. “Yeah, Cal that’s fine, you can’t just not acknowledge someone’s birthday right?” I say blinking away tears. “You’re the best Y/N” he laughs into the phone, “That’s what they tell me” I half smile. “Okay I gotta go now but I’ll see you at the airport tomorrow, love ya bye” he says in a rush “love you too-” I say before he hangs up and I throw my phone across the room in frustration.

I didn’t go to the airport that day, after the phone call and the 2 hour pity party I called one of my best friends from high school and told her what happened. She was living in another state but once she heard what had happened she caught the first flight over. Instead of seeing Calum face to face and telling him about everything, Y/BF/N and I went shopping in the city.  That night, I wore my new outfit and used my new makeup to get dressed up and we went out for dinner. I felt good on the outside but still heartbroken on the inside. Y/BF/N decided to give Calum a wake up call, knowing he still followed her on Instagram, she took a really cute photo of me and posted it captioning “Happy Birthday to the best friend in the universe, may this year be better than the last”. Moments later, I was receiving dozens of calls and messages from Cal and the other 5sos boys, I decided to turn my phone off.

Once we were home, Y/BF/N wished me another happy birthday and went straight to bed. I stayed up a little longer, watching the view of the city lights from my balcony. I walked out into the kitchen and took the cupcake that the restaurant had given to me out of it’s packaging. I grabbed a candle out of my top cupboard and placed it on top, lighting it and I sung happy birthday to myself wishing for a better year.

1 year later

Things were going great for me. In the past year I had continued my songwriting and began recording them with a few friends that I had made through 5sos. Suddenly people had really starting liking them and a fan base began to build up and I began getting record label offers and soon I was opening for people like Halsey and The 1975. Soon enough I had just started my own tour. It was a life I could have never imagined and I had never been happier.

I’d lost touch with Calum, we went from calling everyday to texting a few times a week to once a month until we stopped talking. It was too hard to keep up the charade that I was okay since it was just a constant knife to the heart. I haven’t gone a day without thinking about him or going to call him and then I remember that I’m not his number one girl anymore.

I was about to begin my third show of the tour. My nerves were making me excited, I huddled with my tour group, they had become my family and were all the reason that I was here. We did our pre-show ritual and I could hear the chanting of the crowd waiting for the show to begin. I got into position to walk on stage and took a deep breath as I heard the music for my opening song begin, I start singing and appear on stage, the crowd goes wild.

Towards the end of the show, in between songs, I kneel down at the front of centre stage some fans just an arms reach away. I smile “This next song I’ve never played before because I didn’t think I’d have the strength, but seeing you all here just reminds me how far I’ve come. This is about a boy that I used to know, I guess you could say that I love- loved him” the crowd makes an aww sound which makes me laugh “Anyway, I was head over heels for him and he never really noticed and by the time I had the confidence to say something, he’d fallen for someone else. I was going to show him this song once but he cancelled our plans to hang out with his girlfriend and then he forgot my birthday which just lead up to us losing contact. Anyway, I just wanted to get this off my chest since it’s been a year since then and my birthday’s tomorrow.” The crowd cheers at the last part and I stand up giving a signal to the stage manager to start the song.

‘Feeling used

But I’m

Still missing you

And I can’t

See the end of this

Just wanna feel your kiss

Against my lips

And now all this time

Is passing by

But I still can’t seem to tell you why

It hurts me every time I see you

Realize how much I need you’

I close my eyes and tighten my grip on the microphone

‘I hate you I love you

I hate that I love you

Don’t want to, but I can’t put

Nobody else above you

I hate you I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I’ll never be her’

I walk over to a group of fans and start to interact with them and serenade different people in the crowd

‘I miss you when I can’t sleep

Or right after coffee

Or right when I can’t eat

I miss you in my front seat

Still got sand in my sweaters

From nights we don’t remember

Do you miss me like I miss you?

F*cked around and got attached to you

Friends can break your heart too, and

I’m always tired but never of you

If I pulled a you on you, you wouldn’t like that sh*t

I put this reel out, but you wouldn’t bite that sh*t

I type a text but then I nevermind that sh*t

I got these feelings but you never mind that sh*t

Oh oh, keep it on the low

You’re still in love with me but your friends don’t know

If you wanted me you would just say so

And if I were you, I would never let me go

I don’t mean no harm

I just miss you on my arm

Wedding bells were just alarms

Caution tape around my heart

You ever wonder what we could have been?

You said you wouldn’t and you f*cking did

Lie to me, lie with me, get your f*cking fix

Now all my drinks and all my feelings are all f*cking mixed

Always missing people that I shouldn’t be missing

Sometimes you gotta burn some bridges just to create some distance

I know that I control my thoughts and I should stop reminiscing

But I learned from my dad that it’s good to have feelings

When love and trust are gone

I guess this is moving on

Everyone I do right does me wrong

So every lonely night, I sing this song

I hate you I love you

I hate that I love you

Don’t want to, but I can’t put

Nobody else above you

I hate you I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I’ll never be her’

That’s when I see him, standing in the middle of the mosh just smiling. That’s when I see Calum, a year older, more matured with eyes that almost look like they have tears in them. I freeze, but I have to keep going with the song so I look away, occasionally glancing back over to him.

‘All alone I watch you watch her

Like she’s the only girl you’ve ever seen

You don’t care you never did

You don’t give a damn about me

Yeah all alone I watch you watch her

She’s the only thing you’ve ever seen

How is it you never notice

That you are slowly killing me’

I look straight at him and make eye contact, holding his gaze

‘I hate you I love you

I hate that I love you

Don’t want to, but I can’t put

Nobody else above you

I hate you I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I’ll never be her’

I finish the song, thank the crowd and run off stage. Not talking to anyone and go straight to my dressing room. I sit in my chair in front of the makeup table, occasionally looking into the mirror to make sure that my face isn’t turning red and blotchy, I still have meet and greets to do. I play with the hem of my shirt, a habit that has stayed with me over the year. “What’s up kiddo” I hear a voice say, my head shoots up and I turn around to see Calum leaning in the doorframe, I smile.