Some people lament about how this world will drain you and it’s true. I had no meaningful friendships until I was fourteen and my stepmother constantly tells me that my only worth is my intelligence even though, hell, I don’t feel smart anyway. I’ve never been kissed and I’ve never had someone love me and I’ve always felt like I am a waste of a life but that doesn’t matter. I am rough and ugly but this world is beautiful and every day I promise myself I will throw myself into it with earnest.
I read somewhere that when you go outside and get cold, your small body is trying to heat the whole world. I want to warm this entire world with everything I do, even if it drains me and even if I get cold and tired. I don’t care if life hurts me or if I always fall in love with people who can’t love me or if people use me. I’m gonna keep trying to warm up the whole world and I’ll keep believing people are good and love is real. I want to give everything I have without expecting anything in return. My body is small and I don’t have much warmth to give but I will give it my all anyway. I won’t let my bad experiences turn me cold. I hate myself but there is so much love inside of me; love for the way the light streams through the trees and love for the color of a dusty sunset and love for my beautiful best friend and the way she laughs, all bright-eyed and earnest. I will let everyone and everything feel all the love that I have; I will warm all that I can.
I wrote this originally for a request but i strayed from the prompt so far that it literally doesn’t fit it at all so,,,,I’m just positing it on it’s own and i’ll write the requested one later this week or something
Warnings: swearing, underage drinking, like,,, making out (it’s not nsfw tho it’s pretty tame)
Word Count: 1597
Requests: Open :-)
To say your friends were drunk would be an understatement. The eight of you were coming down from the emotional high of your senior homecoming, but from the looks of it Chloe had yet to come down from the four shots of peppermint vodka she downed ‘as a pregame’ before leaving from the dance.
Of course, you weren’t exactly one to talk, having drank about as much as the rest of them, indulging in some teenage irresponsibility as a way of celebrating your last homecoming. As Rich emerged from Jake’s kitchen with yet another handle of vodka, you couldn’t help but feel like the night would either be one lost as a result of all of you blacking out, or one that would live in infamy.
You were pouring about a shot and a half into a half empty sprite when Jenna emerged from the bathroom, holding her clutch up like a trophy.
“Let’s play seven minutes in heaven!” She said, a wicked smile on her face as she looked at me. My heart sped up a bit, knowing that she would find a way to get me into a closet with Jeremy.