i am on the floor screaming

100 Dialogue Prompts
  1. “Where the hell did that baby come from, Marissa?!" 
  2. “Did you destroy the world AGAIN?”
  3. "What do you mean you’re a serial killer?”    
  4. “Listen, you can’t just keep shoving people off the sides of cliffs.”
  5. “Oh my god. I thought you were dead.”
  6. “That wasn’t there before”
  7. “So what now?” “I have no idea, I thought that would kill us”
  8. “I can’t believe you’re married to death, again!”
  9. “Assassination would seem to be a better career, with your skillset.”
  10. “It’s not my fault that the snails committed mutiny!”
  11. “It’s situations like this that make me question why I follow you anywhere.”
  12. “Where did this dog come from?”
  13. “Did you remember to take the skin off?”
  14. “I was going to ask what you’re doing, but at this point, I don’t think I want to know.”
  15. “Why is there a corpse in the bathtub?”
  16. “What in tarnation”
  17. “I love you, I’ll make you love me too”
  18. “This would be a lot easier if you sat still.”
  19. “You see, it all began when it spoke back.”
  20. “This is the pit where we keep the cube that screams.”
  21. “Why did you steal my door?”
  22. “Why didn’t you just listen to me…”
  23. “Hey, you finally made it!”
  24. “Wait, there were only three of them. Why are there now four?”
  25. “How do you ‘accidentally’ hit someone hard enough to rip a hole through time and space?”
  26. “Why is there bloodstains on the floor, honey?”
  27. “… Why are you… eating tacos at 3 AM?” “Why not?”
  28. “Why would you train your gerbil army to take over the world and enslave humanity?!”
  29. “Are toasters supposed to float?”
  30. “Honey, did you eat the dog”
  31. “Hey bro, where’s our sister?” “Um… we don’t have a sister.”
  32. “Wanna help me steal a giraffe?”
  33. “I told you that you would regret it, now we’ve ended up like this.”
  34. “Why are your clothes all wet? Why are you covered in glitter? Why does your sister have wings? Ah- get off the carpet! It’s getting all wet!”
  35. “You’re not actually sure, are you?”
  36. “What do you expect me to do? I’m a magician, not a wizard!”
  37. “Dad? What are you doing here? This is a spaceship.”
  38. “Mom says I can’t burn the city hall with you. She said that we’re going to my aunt that day.”
  39. “You….you just don’t understand..”
  40. “Okay, so. No more caffeine for you, that’s apparent.”
  41. “Where were you last night?”
  42. “Okay but have you seen what my hair does?! I kills people!”
  43. “I don’t think you understand the term 'dead or alive’, because I don’t know if this thing IS dead or alive”
  44. “What do you mean, ‘there wasn’t a murder weapon’?”
  45. “Time flies, but I can fly faster.”
  46. “You just crashed with MY podship into that wall and all you say is »It’s just a scratch«?”
  47. “Now sweetie, don’t get scared when you hear the gunshots, okay? Just don’t come to the house.”
  48. “and… why do you have a gorilla in your room again?”
  49. “Okay, last question: why is there an owl in the fridge?”
  50. “Well shit, you’re hotter than i was expecting.”
  51. “It turns out, space isn’t actually the final frontier”
  52. “If I had hands right now I would choke you.”
  53. “…why did you think it would be a good idea to set that on fire?”
  54. “Close your eyes, sweetie. They can’t get you then.”
  55. “That tiger, that tiger eats humans”
  56. “I swear, if ONE more person comes at me with their hot dog buns–”
  57. “If you would have just kissed them, we wouldn’t be in this mess! Now we’re tied up on traintracks about to be smushed like bugs!”
  58. “Do I want to know why your'e in my apartment wearing only sport shorts which are quite tight?”
  59. “What do you mean that woman wasn’t you?”
  60. “Why is there a dog on the couch?!”
  61. “Stop dude stop, you scared the dogs.”
  62. “What on earth made you think the banana was a good idea?
  63. "Do I want to know whats in the box”
  64. “Wait, no! Please don’t leave me here, it’s getting dark. Have you not heard the stories of the things in these woods?”
  65. “Those were shoes yesterday”
  66. “Can I at least put on my socks first?”
  67. “Why is the Devil in your living room?” “It’s Saturday, Tom. Date night.”
  68. “John, get your damn death ray off of my cat’s bed. You’ve given poor Fluffy radiation poisoning!”
  69. “I get it, you think I don’t care about you. You think I want nothing to do with you… And you’re right.”
  70. “No. Not after last time.”
  71. “What made you think you could survive this?”
  72. “No! I never said you could reenact General Sherman’s Total War tactic from the Civil War! We’re gonna get arrested!”
  73. “Why does our 8 y/o daughter think that THAT werewolf is her pet dog?! He’s been terrorizing our entire town!!”
  74. “Have you even bothered to consider your options before deciding to bungee jump into the Pacific?”
  75. “That is NOT how you bury a dead body, Jared!”
  76. “Do you know where the cat is? I haven’t seen it in two weeks…”
  77. “You did what?!” “It’s not that big of a deal” “You killed a man!”
  78. “But you love me, don’t you? So you’ll forgive me.”
  79. “I don’t care.”
  80. “You’re a fucking asshole, you know that, right?”
  81. “You’d be surprised how flexible a sloth can be.”
  82. “Oh great, the world exploded…. again”
  83. “I dressed up for THIS?”
  84. “Why? And how?”
  85. “Would it hurt you to tell me exactly where we’re going?”
  86. “You can’t take back those words anymore. Or everything else you did.”
  87. “he didn’t do anything I fucking told him to do!”
  88. “When they came, why didn’t you fight?”
  89. “What are you doing here?” “I was about to ask you the same thing…” “Well, it’s called the hanging tree for a reason.”
  90. “__, please come down from the tree, i’ll treat you to pizza.”
  91. “You can… seriously? Oh my gosh, teach me teach me teach me!!”
  92. “I wasn’t aware that 'monster’ was a term of endearment.”
  93. “Yes, I’m sure your flower pot really is trying to kill you, Debra.”
  94. “Why is our child on the roof?”
  95. “Do you want a hug? Will that help?”
  96. “How could you sign us up for this without reading the fine print?! It says right there that we have to give up everything!!!”
  97. “And it’s been stuck in there how long now?”
  98. “I learned I can’t trust you when the world was "fine”, now tell me one reason not to place a bullet between your eyes and listen to you.“
  99. “Why the hell are you naked in my room?”
  100. "Having criminals line up against their will and you killing them is not community service!”

100 prompts. Amazing. Thank you for sharing your ideas and contributing to our community.

Let’s make a new list right now! Leave a reply and don’t forget the double quotes “”! I will use the first 100 prompts for the next list. One prompt per amigo please!

underrated twenty one pilots lyrics

  • “i don’t believe in talking just to breathe and falling selfishly”
  • “gnawing on the bishops, claw our way up their system”
  • “a mortal, rotting piece of song will help me carry on”
  • “i’m the son of all i’ve done - impostor, been fostered, then my new father drained my dirty blood”
  • “i hope they choke on smoke ‘cause i’m smoking them out the basement”
  • “my nose and feet are running as we start to travel through snow”
  • “i will carry all your shame”
  • “i asked forgiveness three times, same amount that i denied”
  • “put away all the gods your fathers served today, put away your traditions”
  • “we have enough stuff just to blow stuff up”
  • “i’m screaming submission and i don’t know if i am dying or living”
  • “i just won’t let go until we both see the light”
  • “is the blood mine or yours? don’t wanna do this anymore”
  • “am i screaming to an empty sky?”
  • “i could pull the steering wheel”
  • “then i sat up off the floor and found the breath i was searching for” 
  • “tell our dad i’m sorry”
  • “we all know somebody who knows somebody who’s doing great”
  • “hope you’re dead, ‘cause how could you sleep at a time like this?”
  • “i do not have writer’s block, my writer just hates the clock”
The most expensive way ever to get the police involved.

My wife and I had a first floor condo in what had previously been a nice complex. Unfortunately, over time the couple who lived above us (hereafter designated AA for Angry Alcoholic and AAG for Angry, Alcoholic Girlfriend) began drinking heavily, or maybe they just got louder about their drinking. Nearly every night became a massive screaming match between them. They’d stay up until 2 AM shouting at each other at the top of their lungs, then one of them would put on music at top volume to drown out the other. Their taste in music wasn’t actually bad but when it’s 2 AM and my floor is vibrating, it’s a problem. Sometimes they’d even take their fight out into the parking lot, just to be sure all the neighbors were treated to a detailed explanation of who had cheated on who recently (both), and who was threatening to dump who and leave right now. (Neither of them ever actually left, they just went out to their car and threatened to, loudly.)

Then in the mornings he would “work on” his car in the car in the carport right outside our front door. As far as I can tell the all he did was sit there and rev the engine for (it seemed) hours on end. I have no idea when he slept, maybe while we were at work? We and other neighbors complained to the condo board, who issued a warning, which AA and AAG ignored. Eventually the condo board started fining them, but AA found a genius solution- just don’t pay the fine. All the condo board could do was, eventually, put a lien on AA’s condo, but that would only become a problem for him when he sold the place. Apparently, they couldn’t actually foreclose on him, or maybe they just didn’t want to go to the trouble.

Trying to talk to him directly was useless- if we managed to catch him during a rare moment of sobriety, he’d just kind of blow us off, but if we caught him while he was drunk, he’d get pretty threatening and was then even louder for a few days.

We even tried calling the police, but they weren’t really interested unless he actually crossed the line into a felony. They gave him a few warnings, which he also ignored. Maybe if he’d actually beaten me or one of my other neighbors up, they’d have done something, but none of us felt like getting into a fight to find out. Plus there was always the risk that the cops would arrest everybody involved in the fight on general principles, and none of us wanted an arrest record.

Eventually, my wife and I decided to sell our condo and move, for multiple reasons that definitely included AA and AAG. Because of the timing of our move, our realtor wound up actually showing the condo while we were home a couple of times, and we discovered that one of the potential buyers was a city police officer, her husband, and their 1-year old baby. (I guess their old place was too small now that they had a kid.)

Unfortunately, their offer was $3,500 below the top offer. After talking it over, we told our realtor to accept their offer anyway, and we’d just eat the loss. So AA and AAG had a cop move in directly below them.

I’m Facebook friends with a couple of our old neighbors, and in the six months since we moved, AA has been arrested multiple times, and had his car impounded at least once. Apparently he’s now trying to be quieter, but that only lasts until he gets drunk and then he’s screaming again, and his new downstairs neighbor has long ago had enough of his shit, and does not appreciate it if he wakes up her kid. And I guess she also doesn’t appreciate it if he shouts at her. He’s in an “obnoxious neighbor” war with a cop, and he’s losing badly. Hopefully soon he’ll wind up in jail for longer than a couple of days.

umm john would set cute messages as his laptop password for sherlock to guess, and they would range from “get milk” to “love your navy shirt” and then one day sherlock would struggle with guessing the password, and when john comes back from tesco he’d find him on the floor violently smashing the keyboard, and he would scream, “i can’t get it, john, what is it??” but john would just lean on the door frame and look at him with a soft smile and say “take a guess” and sherlock would stop breathing for a second and do a blinky thing and come back to the keyboard, and his shaking fingers would type in the letters and the laptop would ping and he’d gasp and look back at john with tears in his eyes and whisper “i love you too”

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 3

And we did it again, amigos! 

  1. “My sock is missing.”
  2. “I must say it can be rather therapeutic”
  3. “Shit, they spotted us. Quick, put your Obama mask on.”
  4. “You raided my village, killed my parents and slaughtered tens of innocent people. I was able to forgive you for all of that-tell myself it was in your nature. But then you did something heinous. Something beyond all possible hope of redemption. You killed my dog.”
  5. “What do you mean you accidentally assassinated the Pope!?”
  6. “I would love to give a fuck about you but sadly my last one went off to war and never returned”
  7. “If you think I’ll stop my quest for world domination for a bag of cookies, you are,,, right… Now, gimme that!”
  8. “What are you doing with that rubber duckie toy– OH DEAR GOD LORD HAVE MERCY”
  9. “I’m more afraid of myself than you.”
  10. “I already told you, there’s nothing we can do about the fights. We COULD if you stopped spoiling shows and books to everyone.”
  11. “You, my friend, are the most unnecessary when it comes to your excessively sassy attitude.”
  12. “I love you.” “…..What? OH APRIL FOOLS.”
  13. “What is this, a concert for ants???”
  14. “I made it! I’m in the list! This is being a great day since I remembered it’s a Thursday, not a Monday!”
  15. “It’s not that I don’t believe you. It’s just that, well, I’ve got a sink full of dishes and a cat to wash.”
  16. “When you said i had pretty eyes i thought you were complimenting me,not trying to buy them!”
  17. “The wolves eat tonight.”
  18. “Gee, thanks for nearly killing me because of ____!” “Listen up here, are you dead? You’d better be greateful you’re still alive tou little shit.”
  19. "When you said you could fly, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind.”
  20. “Sarah, I love you and all but hOW ON EARTH DO YOU KEEP SENDING OUR PETS TO SPACE?!”
  21. “Look, just because you kidnapped me doesn’t mean I’m going to marry you.”
  22. “How in God’s name did you even get up there?!”
  23. “I think I misplaced my right hand”
  24. “I did it! I got into university!” “That’s great! What course?” “Uh… Would it be a bad thing if I told you that… Dark magic and villainy?”
  25. “Well, it just so happens that I have been a homeless man for three years now. That must mean I’m the chosen one!”
  26. “Have your eyes always been that colour?”
  27. “I’m going to fight the sun!”
  28. “You can’t just run around punching people you don’t like, ____!”
  29. “I’m not into that kinda thing.”
  30. “Dude why did you eat all that cake on your own?”
  31. “I just wanted to know if we could use a plastic knife”
  32. “Uhhhh, guys? Don’t hate me, but I think I just released Satan”
  33. “Well, fine… Just wait a little bit before you do something stupid.” “…”
  34. “What do you mean there’s no bacon flavored ice cream!?”
  35. “What do you mean you’re my sister? I don’t have a sister!”
  36. “Why the hell do we need a duck to hunt Bigfoot?”
  37. “Oh, so you can do pink explosions too”
  38. “This isn’t my kitchen, is it?”
  39. “Ohhh, so THAT’S what you meant by ‘shooting starts’.”
  40. “ACHOO” “bless you” “Thank you, wait a minute I live alone”
  41. “Put my creepy cat in a different room? Don’t be silly! I don’t even have a cat!”
  42. “Katie, please stop shooting me with tranquilizer darts.”
  43. “Why did you think it was a good idea to only bring a potato to this heist?”
  44. “Okay, we make this promise now - nobody look at that fucking goat ever again.”
  45. “Sarah, why is the cat naked?”
  46. “Wait. You’re aroused?”
  47. “Why would that surprise you?”
  48. “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  49. “okay so let me get this straight, you’re not actually my long lost twin…” “yes.” “…because you’re me from another dimension” “…yes.”
  50. “I’m sorry, but did that thing just talk?”
  51. “I thought we promised to never speak of that incident again!”
  52. "Sweetheart”“Yes dear”“Some of your morally challenged friends are trying to kidnap me again.”“And?”“And!?”“You’re a big girl, you can take care of yourself.”“Of course I can, but the gesture would have been nice!”
  53. “how many epilepsy pills can you take before you overdose?” “Just one or two.” “I’m gonna have to call you back.”
  54. “…I was GOING to ask why there’s a pink goo all over the kitchen floor but I think that can wait whilst I ask what the FUCK IS GOING ON?”
  55. “For the last time, can you stop calling that thing 'human’”
  56. “Okay, that is a seriously dodgy looking hat-are you certain you’re right about this?”
  57. “Really Darling, you can stop trying to scream, we’ve already espablished that no one cares and it’s giving you unflattering lines on your forehead.”
  58. “_______, why am I on the ceiling?”
  59. “What the heck happened while I was at the store?
  60. "What the actual fuck!” “I did warn-” “Yes I know you said you were crazy, but this…. This is…” “Just another Tuesday. Oh we’re late for tea!” “With who?!” “With the Queen of course, who else?”
  61. “Despreate times call for cows.”
  62. “Did you burn the last piece of toast again?”
  63. “You didn’t TELL me there’d be free food!”
  64. “Did Jesus really die for this bullshit?”
  65. “Do you want the apocalypse?!! Because that’s how you get the apocalypse!!!”
  66. “Goddamit, I’m dead again aren’t I? How the hell did I do it this time?”
  67. “Dude, no.”
  68. “I may be a horrible person, but at least I am an honest one.”
  69. “I told you, I dress to kill, now fetch me my fancy stilettos, mama’s gonna slay tonight!”
  70. “I left the room for 3 minutes and you really want to tell me you started a war with every single planet?” “Well, I told you 3 months ago to not leave me alone.” “And I told you I have to use the bathroom 3 months ago!”
  71. “Wow, only took 3 minutes to destroy the world.” “Let’s see if I can do it in 2!”
  72. “So… Wh-Why- How did you flush the duck down the toilet?”
  73. “dude. i liked that carpet. do you know how hard it is to wash bloodstains out of carpets.”
  74. “Don’t worry, it’s much worse than it looks.”
  75. “What are you doing ___?” “I’m camping.” “No you’re beside tree with a blank-” “CAMPING”
  76. “WHAT THE FUCK IS A DUCKPOTATO”
  77. “PUT THE PUPPY DOWN AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN!”
  78. “PLEASE DON’T HANG UP! YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ARE IN DANGER!”
  79. “What the hell kind of scream was that? And how did you make it?! ”
  80. “Hey, uhm… Hate to interrupt your conversation, but why the fuck is there a giraffe on the soup aisle”
  81. “You mean to tell me that somebody decided it was a good idea to cross plums and apricots, but nobody can figure out why my cat has RABBIT ears?”
  82. “Sorry but um… why is there a fox and a bear singing Ooh la la by Britney Spears on the balcony? And where is my chicken, Pudding?!”
  83. “Where did you get LIGHT-UP COMBAT BOOTS? THEY CHANGE COLOR?!”
  84. “So you’re telling me there was a genie trapped in that can of soup? And you accidentally ATE THE GENIE?!”
  85. “Listen…don’t take this the wrong way, but…I love the OTHER you better.”
  86. “Tell me why,  exactly, did you need the rubber chicken? ”
  87. “Look, I’m not a liar, alright?  And I ain’t overdramatic or hyperbolic or whatever else you wanna call me.  So when I say I would sell my soul for a pancake right now, I mean I will literally sell my soul for a pancake right now.  And maybe a million dollars.”
  88. “Wait a second, you’re telling me that….. YOU’VE BEEN DATING SATAN BEHIND MY BACK FOR FOUR WHOLE YEARS?!!!”
  89. “Well dad did say he would be gone for five days…what the hell? Let’s go to the corner store!”
  90. “Why did you buy 74 melons?!”
  91. “Where’s the toaster?” “It’s in the kitchen… Why do you have a fork?” “K, thanks.”
  92. “Death, out of all the things in this world, why are so afraid of ____?”
  93. “This floor is like my life; Cold and Hard.”
  94. “So you’re telling me that I am the only thing that is preventing a Third World War, right?” “Yeah, pretty much.”
  95. “I don’t know your name and you don’t know mine but I promise it will turn out okay.”
  96. “Little did you know, they were slowly turning into werewolves.”
  97. “Umm… I may have possibly accidentally blown up another planet”
  98. “I told you not to do that… now look, you’ve lost your hand!”
  99. “Every time you speak I literally die a little”
  100. “One baby soul please, Adult souls give me gas!”

“I need you, yes you (you should feel targeted), to come up with a new dialogue prompt for part 4 and leave it in the comments below. It’s fun and the first 100 replies will make the next list. As always, one prompt per amigo and don’t forget the doubles quotes “”. Pantoffel” (Click here for part 1 and here for part 2)

Lava

Based off this video because I cannot stop laughing


It had started out as a simple enough dare, Dean and Cas would each get a total of 3 tries per person to try and “kill” the other by telling the other that “the floor is lava.” They would then have five seconds before they had to find a way to get off the ground and scream that the floor was lava to any unsuspecting passerby if there were anyway. There was no prize, not really. Dean just really wanted to beat Cas at something, and Cas didn’t mind if he got bragging rights.

Cas had been first, during a walk in the park between their two college classes on campus. “The floor is lava,” he’d casually said. Dean had not understood until he did, and at which point he only had 3 seconds left and nothing that he could use to get off the ground. Nothing, except, for a trashcan just up the trail. He’d made it with one second to spare.

“The floor is lava!” Dean screamed triumphantly, balancing precariously on the poor trashcan below him. He had managed to get into a crouch before the inevitable happened––when Dean went to get down back onto the ground and rejoin Cas he slipped and wound up wedging his butt straight into the trashcan. Castiel wouldn’t let him forget it for a week.

The next turn had been Dean’s, choosing to wait until Cas and he were on a grocery run to enact his plan.

“Hey, Cas,” he called the other’s attention while they were in the toilet paper aisle. 

“Hm?”

“The floor is lava.” 

Keep reading

I had days when all I feel is bricks falling on me, walking and sinking into a floor that gives way. Hollow and empty.

I had days when my heart feels so wretched as if it’s being clawed out from me at that moment.

Days when I felt like I don’t wanna celebrate any milestone I have achieved, birthdays and events.

Days when I look at my loved ones and all I feel is apathy.

I see my loved ones and inside I am screaming for help while my body language says otherwise.


I know better days are coming,
I know I will get better.

I hope.

—  kissmylime 
  • Rhys: Oh my god, I'm going to die.
  • Feyre: At this point, I've kind of passed the level where you're stressed and ascended into a higher realm. I am calm.
  • Rhys: I'm not. Fuck it, I'm gonna de-stress by singing the song of my people.
  • Feyre: [sigh] Do you have to? There are people right there and this is the fourth time this week.
  • Rhys: Screw you, I do what I want. [Collapses onto the floor and screams at the ceiling]
Hold On (trigger warning)

A/N: I’m in Prague with a friend this week and I put this on schedule so lets hope it works.
Requested to use the line “because I love you, that’s why.” Be aware this has a trigger warning, so think twice before reading. Also, I would love to hear feedback on this because I am honestly so fucking nervous.

Word count: 2,638

Hearing someone you love cry, is probably the worst feeling ever. The worst kind of pain I’ve ever experienced. I felt her pain. Deep in my chest. In every fibre of my body. With every dense heart beat. I felt it. Hearing her desperate sore cries from the other side of the door, it killed me inside. Left me numb and frozen.

Keep reading

Jerome Valeska- Trust Me

Request: If you want to, could you do #4 with Jerome?

Prompt: “Do you trust me?”

Author: Isa

*Trigger warning: extreme fluff, Jerome being cute…

Y/N’s POV

“Jerome…?” I say looking around and poking my head in each room. I couldn’t find him anywhere. “Where are you…?” I whisper to myself. Out of nowhere, the psychotic ginger jumps out and scares me.

“BOO!” Jerome screams. “Aww, doll. Your face was priceless when I scared the crap out of you,” He says in between laughs. I stare at him coldly signaling that I was pissed off.

“Jerome, that wasn’t fucking funny!” I yell at him. “I was looking for you to do some things… Maybe not, anymore. Sorry. That’s what you get for being a jerk,” I say. I was impressed with myself. It was funny seeing his bright smile turn to a look of sheer terror.

“We were going to… have sex?” He says. I nod in response. “And I fucked it up so, now you’re punishing me?” I nod, again. “Y/N, I AM SO SORRY, PLEASE!”, He screams as he lowers himself to his knees. I had to admit, I loved seeing him like this.

I stood there giggling to myself. He started wrapping his arms around my waist whilst on his knees. “Please… forgive me… for I have sinned…” He jokes.

“Oh, shut up! Come here,” I say making him get up. “You’re lucky you’re cute,” I mumble before cupping his face and bringing it down for a kiss.

-

“Hey, Y/N,” Jerome says. We sat alone on the couch, bored.

“What, ginger?” I respond blandly.

“Wanna do trust falls?” He asks quite excitedly. A smirk appears on his face. I could tell he was up to no good.

“Fine. But, I swear, I will hurt you if you let me fall,” I say warning him.

We get into positions. Of, course I was the first to fall back.

“Do you trust me?” He asks.

“Yes… And I’m only saying yes because… I love you…” I say back trying not to get too emotionally romantic during this fun game.

“Doll, you’re so cute…” He says. “I love you…”, He mumbles at such a low volume, I could barely hear it.

I look back and see a grin plastered on his face. Great. I lean back with my arms across my chest. Here goes. I fall back and, not, to my surprise, nothing catches me. I land right on my back. A loud smacking sounds on the floor.

The dumbass stands there pointing and laughing at me. I roll my eyes and sigh.

“I hate you,” I say with such disbelief.

“No, you love me. You just said it. Come on, doll. You love me,” He started off trying to contradict my statement and then his eyes fell to the floor. “And I…I love you…” is all he mutters before staring at me. I smile sweetly at him.

“Aren’t you so cute? Aww. Jerome’s getting romantic. HA!” I say trying to get a smile out of him.

“STOP! I MURDER PEOPLE. I AM NOT CUTE!” He screams.

“I love my little ginger murderer.”

How I see certain breeds:

Pugs: adorable…little hell spawns that are impossible to restrain during a toenail trim
Labs: adorable idiots that shed like a mother
Chihuahuas: land shark
Boxers: the best sad puppy eyes EVER
Cockers: the worst ears EVER
Shar Pei: hives…I am breaking out in hives
Golden Retriever: cancer
Cavaliers: heart disease…:(
Shi Tzu: always look scared and surprised… at the same time
Bulldogs: a genetic nightmare
Huskies: too sensitive to function
Salukies: skinny…so freaking skinny
Border Collie: watching you…always watching you
Heelers: shy and a bit sketchy
Great Danes: giant babies
Malamute: giant babies who scream
Dachshund: Will bite and desperately in need of a middle set of legs
Westies: Cushing’s
Jack Russels: soo much energy
Saint Bernard: floor mat
Mastif: drool…drool everywhere

  • me on the internet: wow girls sure are pretty huh here's some pickup lines that I'd totally use and some jokes about how lesbian I am
  • me in actual proximity to a girl: on floor, cannot remember own name, forgot the entire english language, stares at her until she notices and then spontaneously combusts, friends laugh at me, someone screams in the background
GOT7 Reaction // When they find out you’re pregnant.

i love writing fluff get ready :)


Mark

lil baby had to ask you to repeat yourself cause he couldn’t believe you. Mark would wrap you in the tightest hug and kiss you all over your face. HE COULDN’T BELIEVE THE TWO OF YOU WERE GOING TO BE PARENTS AHH.

“this is actually happening oh my god i love you”

Originally posted by gsvnrewind

Jaebum

He was barely awake when you told him, so once he finally heard you, his eyes grew big and began to freak out. You thought he was jumping from wall to wall at one point. He was so excited since he really didn’t see this coming.

“OH MY GOD. Y/N IS PREGNANT!”

Originally posted by daefsoul

Jackson

You honestly thought his soul escaped his body. He practically screamed and picked you up from the legs and started jumping. He left multiple kisses on your face and embraced you in a big, affectionate hug.

“THERE’S GONNA BE A WANG PUPPY”

Originally posted by got7ish

Jinyoung

His jaw dropped all the way down to the floor once you showed him your pregnancy tests. He used this moment to wrap you in the most heartwarming hug ever.

“You’re gonna be the best mother I love you so much.”

Originally posted by markjin

Youngjae

Once you told him he started running around the house screaming. HE WAS SO EXCITED!! He picked up coco and ran to you and started jumping all over the place. He was so soft.

“I am so excited and proud of you, coco is too.”

Originally posted by gsvnrewind

BamBam

Oh my boi. This was the moment he realized he needed to start maturing more and taking better care of you. He was overwhelmed by the pressure, but was still incredibly happy for the both of you.

“I need to be the best father in the world. WE’RE GONNA HAVE A CHILD”

Originally posted by irrational-obsessions-gottcha78

Yugyeom

When you told him, he thought you were joking until you showed him the tests. He ran away and hid in a closet and basically started crying. He was so overwhelmed with happiness and once he came out from hiding, he hugged you so tightly and gave you a peck on the cheek.

“Do you know what this means?! I’m gonna be a dad, you’re gonna be a mommy! OH MY”

Originally posted by yugeyos


I don’t think you understand how much I cried while writing this omg.

GOT7 MASTERLIST (X)

anonymous asked:

9&10!!

9. For fuck’s sake, just shut up.

10. It’s too early for this.

Sorry for any typos!

“You know what, Harry? Yes, okay? Yes! I am mad at you!” Y/N screamed as she slammed the front door open to their shared home. She threw the house keys onto the floor carelessly while struggling to take her jacket off. Harry, who was a few steps behind, let out a groan as he kneeled down and scooped up the keys with his hand.  

“You know what, Y/N?” he mimicked her tone and continued, “you knew for a fact that I couldn’t have done anything.”

Y/N turned around and shot him a cold glare, “your friend despises me, and you let him insult me in front of everyone? Are you well aware of how humiliated I felt?”

Harry ignored her and began walking towards the kitchen, brushing his shoulder against hers without a care.

“Oh, okay. Real mature, Harry.” Y/N sat on the floor and focused on trying to take her heels off.

She glanced over at what he was doing and saw him pouring dog food for Gracie, Y/N and Harry’s shared dog, who was wagging her tail back and forth waiting anxiously for the food.

Y/N couldn’t help but feel the anger consume her, as if it were eating her alive. After taking both heels off, Y/N rose to her feet and whispered, “you’re pathetic, Harry.” Right as she was heading up the steps to their bedroom, Harry’s words struck her and stopped Y/N in her tracks.

“For fuck’s sake, just shut up.” he spat such incredulous, disgusting words her way, it was something she wasn’t used to.

Something told her to turn around, so she did. She listened to the voice in her head telling her to run out of the front door while she still had the chance. It was either that, or sleep with someone who hated her guts that night.

Before she knew it, Y/N was out the door running for her dear life. It was 3 A.M., and the street lights had no effect for the pitch black night.

Harry instantly threw his head up at the sound of the front door slamming shut.

“Shit,” he muttered. Harry set down the dog food and petted Gracie before he shot to his feet and began chasing after his girlfriend.

“Y/N! Slow down, love” he spoke with uneven breathing. He silently cursed himself for brushing off her track and field abilities from her old high school days.

Thirty seconds passed and Harry managed to reach Y/N, instantly wrapping two strong arms around her. They both tripped a couple of times over the sudden embrace, but he refused to let her fall. Harry pulled her closer to his chest, letting out breaths here and there.

“Let me go,” she whispered.

“You wish.”

“My parents live a block away, it’s not like I was running off to nowhere.” she mumbled.

Harry sighed and nuzzled his face into her hair, “I know that. But it hurt me seeing you go.” Things were silent for a few minutes, but they weren’t complaining. She felt safe in his arms, and for a minute, she felt idiotic for running out of the door like that.

“I’m sorry, love.” He finally broke the silence between them, “I should have spoke up for you. I just… I didn’t want to start a fight in front of everyone there.” 

She slowly reached her hand up, tugging at his arm.

“And I’m sorry for not realizing how badly that could’ve turned out…” she replied.

She felt his soft lips press to the back of her hair, “Don’t apologize… It’s too early for this. Let’s go back inside, yeah?”

Y/N turned her body and was fully facing him now, allowing a small smile to take over her features. Harry smiled in return and embraced her one last time before grabbing her hand and walking back to their house.

spiritual stages of Nearly Witches

this song is a blessing
1) the kid choir thingy group signing the french intro and us singing along to it and wondering what the fuck they’re saying
2) the awesome ass instrumental after??????
3) “MY WINGTIPS WALTZ ACROSS NIAVE WOOD FLOORS THEY CREAK INNOCENTLY DOWN THE STAIRS” fucking rising from the dead to give this line our heart and soul
4) “DRaaaAAAAaaAAAAg MEL O DY MY PURCUS SIVE FEET SERVE COBWEB HEADACHES” if i could type the way i scream “drag” in this song, i just did. spaces are little staccatos
5) at 1:25 when they do the TWO CLICKS COULD YOU JUST IMAGINE BEING AT A V&V ERA SHOW AND BRENDON AIR HUMPING IN SYNC WITH THE TWO CLICKS ITS AN ACTUAL THING
6) “dodododo dodoDODODO” FUCK ME
7) “HERE I AM COMPOSING A BURLESQUE, OUT OF WHERE THEY REST THEIR NECKS” is it JUST ME or do you guys also sing it in the valley girl squeaky voice that brendon does in the live performances?????? BECAUSE ME
8) “ITS NE VA SI LENT”
9) “EVER SINCE WE MET” SHIT
10) “I ONLY SHOOT UP WITH YOUR PERFUME” i take off in a foxtrot partner dance at this part, like i’m on so you think you can fucking dance or something
11) “ITS THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES ME FEEL AS GOOD AS YOU DO” MORE LYRICS ABOUT RYAN HMMMMM
12) dead bc ryden
13) thats it

I hate you │1

All you’ve ever wanted was a peaceful student life, but when a vicious fuckboy gets involved in your business, everything changes.

Originally posted by jeonify

member: Jeon Jungkook x reader

genre: fluff, romance, angst

word count: 1740

warnings: fuckboy!Jungkook badboy!Jungkook; 

I hate you Masterlist  123 4 5 6

A/N: This is the very first fic I wrote, I already have the next part planned, so please tell me what you think, what you liked and disliked. I’ll try to take your suggestions into account 


Being a university student was new for you,  exciting but scary at the same time. Having gotten a scholarship and being the straight-A student all your life, you felt pressured. How would the freshmen year ago? What kind of new experiences would it bring? 

You were deep into thoughts when someone loudly opened the door stopping your lecturer from speaking. Your head involuntarily followed the loud click of the door just to be met with the muscular grinning boy in ripped jeans and a white oversized T-shirt. Only when his eyes found yours you realized you’d been staring at him. 

“Not bad for the first day”, you thought to yourself, breaking the stare not to seem rude, but still looking at the guy from the corner of your eyes as he slowly sank into his chair and plugged his earphones in.  What was the point of attending a lecture if he didn’t even listen to the lecturer? He was handsome, you’d give him that, but he definitely was not the guy for you, or so you thought.

Keep reading

day trips | cole sprouse

a/n: apparently you like cole one shots so i will deliver! a/n: apparently you like cole one shots so i will deliver!

prompts 6 “stop looking at me like that & 13 “i can’t believe you talked me into this”

“you excited?” cole teases as we drive to our secret location “i can’t believe you talked me into this” i complain rolling my eyes.

cole had managed to talk me into modelling for him and i was extremely nervous, you never consider yourself very photogenic and you would almost never let cole shoot you it was always you taking photos of him.

you’d know each other for years yet everytime he begged he was always unsuccessful but this time something was different when he asks so you decided to give the poor boy a shot.

you were now sitting in the passenger seat of Coles jeep driving to what he likes to call his ‘secret location’. after 20 minutes of guessing and begging him to tell me where we were going he just replied with “it’s a surprise”.

“you know i hate surprises” i complain dropping my bottom lip at him “oh god please don’t look at me like that you know how i feel about that” he warns

i batter my eye lids and fake sniffling and i can see him fighting with himself to not look and give in “stoppppp” he drags out the ‘p’ and fake whines.

i break character and place me feet up on the dash my long legs catching some sun “you suck” i tell him grabbing my phone and switching the song.

i glance at the window as we head through fields “where the hell are we cole?” i ask slightly worried at the lack of life. “you’ll see” he smirks.

i take a few pictures on my phone before i find myself feeling more at ease with the whole idea, i catch cole staring at me in the corner of my eye as my hair whips around my face in the wind.

after a few more minutes we pull into a dirt park and we hop out, i glance around breathless “it’s beautiful” i mumble glancing at the scenery taking in the smell the sound and the atmosphere.

i hear the clicks of a camera but im too engrossed in the surroundings “i know” i hear him replying snapping pictures of me.

“so?” i ask shyly turning to face him “what do i do?”

i scuff my cons in the dirt and he chuckles at my awkwardness

“here” he chuckles grabbing my hand and walking me over the small hill to reveal a field of flowers and overgrown grass.

“just explore and ill take some pictures and then ill take you into the field okay?” i nod fiddling with the ends of my cardigan.

i do as cole says and take in all my surrounds reaching out and feeling the small leaves in my hands frolicking around the fields glancing back every so often to make sure coles still trailing behind me.

“okay let’s sit you here” he reaches out he’s hand and i take it stepping over a patch of flowers i sit where he instructs “okay and just pose ill take a few shots and see what the look like”

he starts off at a distance snapping photos and then inching closer to me “your doing really good” he mumbles letting me know that im doing something right.

i remove my cardigan leaving me in my white sundress, he lowers the camera and stares at me as i fiddle with my hair. i blush as he refuses to break eye contact “cole!” i complain “don’t look at me like that- it’s making me nervous-” i giggle nervously.

he snaps out of his daze licking his lips “sorry- uh maybe you should put the jacket back on-” he stutters clearing his throat, i look at him puzzled.

“what? too much skin” i tease pulling my hair to one side “yes a lot i it’s distracting” he finishes his Adam’s apple bobbling.

i let out a giggle my cheeks turning red as i clutch my stomach “are you laughing at me?” he asks the camera clicking “yes” i reply trying to catch my breathe.

i can hear his laughs as he moves his angle taking more photos before moving closer i lift my dress up a little further up my thigh and i see his eyes dart to my fingers before trying to look anywhere but my legs.

“your such a tease” he mumbles almost inaudible “what was that sprouse?”

“tilt your head a little and maybe play with your hair” i roll my eyes and follow his instructions noticing the redness tinting on he’s cheeks.

after another 20 or so minutes he finally told me i could have a break, i stood slowly brushing myself down getting all of the grass and flowers petals from my dress and hair.

i start toward cole watching my step when i hear buzzing i stop trying to find the source i spot a few bees hanging around me, i squeal and try and dodge them running blindly toward the dirt track.

my screaming must’ve got Cole’s attention because soon enough he was standing in front of my camera dangling from his neck and his hands on my shoulders “what’s wrong?” he asks worriedly.

i turn my head in search for the evil insects but no sign off them anywhere. “fucking bees” i tell him and he laughs at my distress.

i face him again and i notice that he’s hands where on my waist, i must’ve been too wrapped up in fear to notice them snake around me but now that they do i can’t seem to make eye contact with him.

a minute or so passes and he moves away from me looking out to the fields “do you-” i pause and he turns around

“do you ever get like nervous or flustered when your shooting with really good looking people? the models you shoot with well they’re models”

he slings the camera bag over his shoulder “well i mean no, not normally but there are certain times that i do, certain girls in pretty summer dresses” i glance down at my cons to try and hide my embarrassment.

“shall we go?” he asks and i nod “wanna give me a ride back” i ask sweetly placing my hands on his shoulders

“jump on” i squeak as he lowers himself down enough for me to jump around his hands finding my thighs to hold me up “sorry if im heavy” i apologise as we take the short walk to the car.

“please are you saying i am not strong enough” he scoffs pretending to take offence “well i mean-” i joke and he losses his grip so i slip a little before placing me on the floor in offence.

i decided to play with him and scream out falling out as i fall to the ground grasping my ankle, he turns around in a split second the smirk wiped off his face “oh my god”

he drops onto his knees “are you okay- what’s wrong- oh my god im sorry-” he rambles running his hands through his hair.

i break character and begin to laugh hysterically, he realises he fell for it and springs up picking m up by my waist and throwing me over his shoulder “thats it your dead”

i squeal trying to squirm out of his grip “put me down!!” i yell laughing at the brunette boy.

he places me on the bonnet of his jeep and stands inbetween my legs “admit it i got you good” i tease poking at his chest. he tries to fight the smile working it’s way across he’s face but fails miserably and starts laughing.

i take my hand and place it on his face and he inches closer hands on my thighs, i slip my hand down to the nape of his neck and pull his lips onto mine. he kisses back as he hands work they’re way up to my face mine go through his hair.

i pull away both of us panting for air “god i had no idea you could kiss like that-” he tells me surprised before re kindling our kiss my legs wrapping around his waist as the kiss turns into a make out sesh.

a car pulling up next to us in the only thing that stops us from continuing, i hide my face from the strangers cole still standing between my legs with his hands on my thighs. he smiles and greets the people awkwardly and waits for them to start down the trail before lifting me off the top of his car.

“to be continued” he mumbles kissing me.

i smile at him hopping into the passenger side, my feet up on the dash the music blaring his hand on my thigh and the wind in my hair as we make our way back home, i slip my hand over his and watch him as he drives the sunlight hitting his face thats when i realised, he is so out of my limit.

shoutout to @juggiexbets my homie give her a follow she’s forreal the cutest bean ever🌈💛🥂👱🏻‍♀️✨🤴🏼💐

Originally posted by grustniyautist

pet shop girl

Harry is lonely and meets a girl at a pet shop 

 I slowly pulled in and parked in the spot directly right in front of the shop. I turn off the ignition and pull the keys out of the socket and stuff them in my pocket. I reach for the door handle and pull it down to step out of the car. I stroll up and step on the side walk, reaching and ripping the door handle open. I hear the loud chimes as I opened the door all the way. I see an older woman feeding a few of the puppies some kibble, when she notices my presence she lifts her head up and look over towards my way.

Keep reading

Spiders

Leonardo (2014/16) x Reader

Notes: Thanks for the idea, ily b <3 @llturner7 IT’S A SHORT DRABBLE BABES

Prompt: “How bout a Leo x reader, something comical and fluffy. Where Leo discovers one of her phobias or something. Not sure about what kind of phobia”

Word count: 459

Warnings: Swearing

Disclaimer: I don’t own TMNT, and you belong to you <3


“Leo!” you yelled, jumping on top of the chair Raphael was sat on, who looked extremely annoyed

“Leo!” he bellowed, smacking his comic on your leg to get you down, “Control yer woman!”

“Excuse me Raph,” you grumbled, take a pause from your screaming, “I am a strong, independent woman. Leo does not need to control me.” ‘Unless in the bedroom.’ You kept that thought to yourself and started screaming again, Raphael becoming ever more irritated. “Just fucking move and kill it Raph!”

“I ain’t movin’ nowhere, I was ‘ere first.”

 After a while, Leo came into the room and looked very amused by what was happening. You were literally sitting on Raphael’s shell, screaming at him to get up and kill the tiny spider that was on the floor of the lair. It was literally the size of a pinky nail.

“What’s going on here-” Both you and Raph started yelling at the same time about what was happening, you jumping from the chair to the table, to the couch and jumping on to Leo.

“Leo! Kill it!” you screamed into his ear, hiding your face into his neck.

“Babe, it’s not there any more,” you screamed again in his ear, crawling further up his large body. Raphael was howling with laughter at this point, probably the sight of Leo’s face as you clambered up to his shoulders, sitting on his shell like you had Raph’s. “[Y/N]. It’s just a spider.”

“It is not just a spider! It’s a demon with multiple limbs and the power to crawl into your mouth while you sleep and kill you from the inside out!” you yelled at him, narrowing your eyes at the ground to find the little critter. “There! There it is!” You screeched, pointing frantically at the ground where the small spider was sat there. Not really moving at all.

Leo walked with you to the kitchen, grabbing a cup and a piece of tissue.

 Getting rid of it was easy; trying to make you stop screaming whilst he carried you and it to the entrance of the lair was the hard part. It was apparently too close to you for comfort.

“My hero!” you grinned as he picked you up off his shoulders and set you down in front of him, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Just doing my duty.” He leant down, kissing you softly.