i am melancholic

ID #70098

Name: Allister
Age: 17
Country: USA

Hi, I’m Allister, and also a trans guy. I’m a senior in high school, and I plan on studying nursing in college. I also want to go to grad school, to be a nurse anesthetist. If you care about personality type stuff, I am an INFJ, a 5w6, melancholic temperament, neutral good, and a Ravenclaw.

In my free time I usually watch tv or daydream? I love Warriors (book series), Grey’s Anatomy, and Criminal Minds. I am autistic, and I focus a lot on Warriors, so I may talk about it too much! Please tell me if I do, I really need to make a friend willing to be blunt with me. I can’t send letters, so I would prefer to talk to someone through tumblr IMs or like, discord. Eventually we could text I guess? 

Preferences: 16-19. I tend to get along better with gals but I’ll talk to guys. I’d love to meet other LGBT people!

They say that the eye is the window of a soul, I am convinced. I see things quite different sometimes , I am melancholic individual , My friends see me as a blunted person- an introverted psyche. nevertheless my taste are quite odd (and sometimes others see it as a shame and i’m being stigmatized) I can say that this is one of the reasons why i’m special and one of the variables of my worth

If you’re alone, make sure you’re not lonely

because if you are, I blame myself.

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I found this piece on spotify by accident. I was listening to it on my 20 minute walk to uni, and felt compelled to write. So I wrote this-

I am soft like the lover you can’t forget.
I am strong like the intent of your soul.
I am erratic and
melancholic and joyful.
I am voices. And I am none. 
I am a language unlike any other.
Can you hear me? Perhaps,
But do you understand me?
Because right now, I’m screaming.
I am one instrument.
An organ.
I am two hands and ten finger tips. I am 88 keys. I am two hundred and thirty strings.
I am a thousand breaths and sighs.
Do you hear me?

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Worthwhile. Kopjec is new to me. I stated Badiou’s axiomatic egalitarianism in 2005 around the absurdity of Namibian aborigines being equalised by being pushed into State housing and non-natives given hunting rights on their former lands. Did it all happen? Elsewhere it certainly does. Hence it is not about Equal Rights, our need, it is for Equal access to Rights.
Further, as a Melancholic I am shaken, not by the (Lacan or Freud?) diagnosis of denial itself, but by my version which is, apparently, an extinguishing of envy. And more so by attempting to be unenviable at times. I’ll explore this in my Medium texts.

Kopjek’s very movement of thought is a pleasure. In this instance - I’ve only taken Rawls as thought experiment, albeit of PTSD we can know investigate knowing his WW2 service and the psychological operations that crews internalised specific to MacArthur’s Pacific campaign. Rawls was at sea, as was JFK in the same craft I recollect. The B29 operation is the esprit d'corps of that era, however.

I love how VIXX has got us all covered from the music genres front to match our moods...

When I am feeling particularly angsty + the entire world should keep out of my lair ~ HYDE, ON AND ON, VOODOO DOLL

When I am in a melancholic mood and just wanna weep ~ ETERNITY, ERROR, BEAUTIFUL LIAR, LOVE EQUATION (no it ain’t a happy song in spite of the video), CAN’T SAY

When you’re feeling grateful and thankful ~ LOVE LETTER, THANK YOU FOR BEING BORN, WITH ME

When I am all dandy and being all free spirited ~ G.R.8.U, ROCK UR BODY, SUPER HERO

When there’s just that feeling of rebellion and sass + with a dash of attitude ~ CHAINED UP, HOT ENOUGH

When it’s just time for ballads and instrumentals ~ SOMEDAY, DEPEND ON ME, ON A COLD NIGHT


*[okay there are far too many to list but you get the gist]