i am just impressed as hell with all this

Drabble Challenge! #1 - 150

Rules: Followers send a number to your ask and you write a drabble using that sentence/prompt in your piece. Try to keep up! Expect a TON of requests!

  1. Take the long way around
  2. Can you shut up for five minutes, please???
  3. He’s been gone for quite a while
  4. I can’t see anything.
  5. I heard a noise.
  6. Scary movies are for chumps.
  7. You’ve gone to the bathroom fifty times today.
  8. The floor is lava.
  9. Where’s my food?
  10. I bet you feel like an artist
  11. Did you ever clean the attic?
  12. Can I be of assistance?
  13. Get out of the way before I murder you.
  14. I think you forgot who wears the pants in this relationship
  15. You’re breaking my heart, babe.
  16. Cry me a river.
  17. Build a bridge.
  18. Get over it.
  19. Another credit card?!
  20. It’s just rain, you aren’t gonna melt!
  21. When’s the last time YOU cleaned the bathroom?
  22. I don’t know why I married you.
  23. Have you ever lied to me?
  24. If I trip over one more of your shoes, I’m throwing them all away.
  25. Aren’t you supposed to be the adult?
  26. I’m stuck! Help me!
  27. I swear, I’m not scared.
  28. What do you think a cupholder is for?
  29. You know when your phone buzzes, it means I’m trying to talk to you, right?
  30. Turn that sh*t off!!!!
  31. When’s that last time we went on a date?
  32. I thought you didn’t like cats?
  33. The door’s locked.
  34. Remember when you were a kid and you ______ (insert memory)
  35. I’ll just tell your mom on you.
  36. I thought you were nice.
  37. I had a dream about you.
  38. I work pretty hard around here, but you get all the credit
  39. What color do you like better?
  40. Am I your husband or your taxi service?
  41. Take notes, sweetheart.
  42. This is where you impress me, right?
  43. Pick up lines only work when I’m drunk.
  44. I can’t believe you didn’t remember
  45. If that makes me a child, so be it.
  46. I could beat you up, you know that right?
  47. Would it kill you to help people?
  48. I bet you can’t go 24 hours without cussing.
  49. But, I said I love you.
  50. Is it just me or is cold as hell in here?
  51. I’m not weird, you’re just basic.
  52. Just sleep with one eye open, that’s all I’m saying
  53. Take off your shirt.
  54. Why’s there a pregnancy test in the trash?
  55. Way to go, kid.
  56. I found the candles, we’ll be alright.
  57. We could get struck by lightning, but you want to kiss in the rain.
  58. You’re never this quiet, what’s wrong?
  59. …or we could make out….
  60. I said “I HAVE AN IDEA!”
  61. Down the hall, second door on the left.
  62. I warned you. He warned you. Your freaking mom warned you.
  63. Sit still, for the love of all that is Holy.
  64. Are you even human?
  65. We’ll talk later.
  66. K.
  67. I’m afraid.
  68. I thought there was time.
  69. Can you just leave me alone?
  70. I’ll carry it.
  71. We’re not ‘fine’.
  72. Are you really taking his side right now?
  73. I like proving you wrong.
  74. Girls can’t drive, plain and simple.
  75. Who are you?
  76. I think you need stitches
  77. Must be a coincidence
  78. Can you be romantic for once?
  79. This is your fault by the way.
  80. Nothing bad is going to happen, baby, I promise.
  81. Excuse me for falling in love with you.
  82. I have fans. More fans than you to be exact.  
  83. I paid for half and you ate three-quarters.
  84. I knew you’d be mad.
  85. If you die, I’m going to kill you.
  86. You’ve never smoked anything in your life.
  87. You gave me a black eye.
  88. Stop looking at me like that, weirdo.
  89. What if it sinks?
  90. Birds can’t fly without wings.
  91. Sorry I’m protective over the things I love.
  92. That SOOO classifies as a date.
  93. No backsies.
  94. You’re an idiot. I married an idiot.
  95. I never liked it, I lied.
  96. Remember, we have to get up early tomorrow.
  97. Are you trying to flirt? Because, you’re embarrassing yourself.
  98. Remember when we were dating and you _____
  99. Be brave, sweetheart.
  100. I’m sorry, but that was adorable.
  101. You don’t hate me, quit lying to yourself.
  102. You hear that? That’s the sound of my awesomeness.
  103. She’s my daughter, I can read her diary.
  104. That’s a fact, Jack.
  105. Actually, I couldn’t care less.
  106. I try my best.
  107. Doesn’t make a difference to me anyways.
  108. I’m glad you’re mine.
  109. You look pretty good for your age.
  110. You passed out for like an hour.
  111. Delete it. Now.
  112. You’re a jerk.
  113. Are you high?
  114. No, you’re MY bitch.
  115. Ew ew ew. You’re so gross.
  116. Spare change for the poor and lonely.
  117. She’s 6, how can she scare you?
  118. When’s the last time we ______
  119. He’s spoiled rotten.
  120. I can’t stay long.
  121. There’s nothing we can do.
  122. Do you ever stop smiling?
  123. Step aside and watch a pro.
  124. Never give him stuff like that!
  125. You’re the one who left it laying around.
  126. I’m a lucky girl. I’ll admit that.
  127. Teach me how to play?
  128. It’s called a prank.
  129. Well, you’re a prick.
  130. Good, I hope you feel bad.
  131. You have cold, you’re not dying.
  132. I have reasons. You wouldn’t get it.
  133. I hope you have a cold shower.
  134. You don’t mean that.
  135. Sing to me, please.
  136. Did you enjoy yourself last night?
  137. Why do they behave for you?
  138. Stop making your own rules.
  139. Don’t open an umbrella in the house.
  140. You know what happens when you assume things.
  141. That’s open for discussion.
  142. Oh, what a shocker, you have an excuse.
  143. Be serious for two minutes, please.
  144. I cheated.
  145. What’s the biggest lie you ever told?
  146. Pillows are over-rated.
  147. Zombies aren’t real, I promise.
  148. Are we lost or do you know where we are?
  149. We started with one and now we have seven. You have no chill.
  150. *Make up your own*

Happy Writing! Visit @prompt-bank for more prompts!

Lipstick stains

Summary: She and Tom don’t exactly get along, but really, everyone knows they just need to bang.

Pairings: Reader (?) x Tom Holland

Word count: 1.9k

Warnings: Some swearing and some smut

A/n: I’m sorry this is so shitty :/ but let me know what ya think anyways :)))

“Nice ass.”

“And this is as close as you’ll get to it.”

“Wouldn’t want it anyway.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

It was a good feeling when she got the last word in. It meant she won that round, and boy, there were many rounds of snarky banter. Neither she nor Tom were overly fond of each other and did what they could to avoid any situation involving the other. However, when your best friends are dating, it’s inevitable. Kat and Haz, what a cute couple. She and Tom, no way in hell. Or at least, that’s what they said every time somebody suggested they ‘just make out already’. See, the thing with those two is that they had undeniable chemistry; the room was thick with sexual tension whenever they were together. It was apparent to everyone but them.

They were currently at the boys’ shared apartment. When Haz had asked the both of them to help him prepare for tonight, they had begrudgingly agreed. It was Kat’s birthday, and being a good boyfriend, he was throwing her a surprise party. As much as they disliked each other, she and Tom loved their friends.  

Haz had put them in charge of decorations, so here she was, standing on a wooden stool in the living room, Tom on the ground behind her. She was on her toes, trying to tape streamers to the ceiling. Due to the height difference, he had a perfect view of her ass. She was annoying, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t hot – not that he’d ever admit that out loud.  

Suddenly she wobbled a little, and as if on instinct, he immediately reached out. He grabbed her waist, steadying her.

“Hands off, Holland,” she said sternly, not even looking at him.

“Geez, I was just trying to help,” he removed his hands, holding them up defensively.

“My knight in shining armour,” her words dripped with sarcasm.

He rolled his eyes at her.

Having finally taped that section, she asked Tom for another piece. The small seat she was standing on didn’t allow room for much movement. As she turned to take it from him, she lost her balance. With a yelp, she fell forward – right on top of Tom. They crashed to the floor in a loud heap.

They both groaned; him underneath her, she with her face pressed against his throat. She lifted her head and winced. Haz came running in.

“What is going on in h–,” he stopped midsentence when he saw them on the floor, in quite the compromising position.

He grinned.

“What happened?”

“It’s not what you think.”

“I’m sure,” he said amused, his grin getting wider. He contemplated taking pictures but thought better of it. They’d kill him.

“She fell on me,” Tom grunted.

“No, I didn’t!” she protested.

“You literally fell off the stool, onto me.”

“Okay, fine, I did,” she huffed as she stood up, checking for bruises.

Tom was still lying on the floor, taking a moment to recuperate.

“Um, mate?” Haz snickered, looking down at him.


Haz checked to see if she had noticed yet, before answering, “You got a little something there,” indicating his collarbone.

Tom swiped at the area, not finding anything.

“What? What is it?” he questioned. He too stood up and looked between the two, puzzled.

By now, she had realised what Haz was talking about and suppressed a smile.


She pointed at the mirror on the wall and allowed him to make the discovery. She and Haz exchanged a look and giggled.

“What the fuck?”

They burst out laughing. Right at the base of his throat, there was a perfect impression of her lips, her red lipstick staining his pale skin. Glaring at his reflection, he tried to wipe the mark away but only succeeded in smudging it.

“How the hell am I supposed to get rid of this?” he growled.

“Will you relax? It’s just lipstick,” she reassured.

“Yeah, that makes it seem like you two were getting intimate,” Haz snorted.

“Shut up,” the other two snapped in unison.

“Okay, okay,” he backed out of the room. “I’m gonna finish up in the kitchen. You guys should finish all this too, party’s starting soon.”

She nodded at him and turned to look at Tom. He was still rubbing at that spot and she could tell that it had spread all over his neck now.

Sighing, she walked over to her bag and pulled out a makeup wipe. She sauntered over to him and held out the tissue. He took it reluctantly and cleaned the lipstick off.

She crossed her arms and waited for him, expecting a thank you.

“You’re welcome, by the way,” he said instead.

“For what?” she asked in confusion.

“You fell on me, I cushioned your fall. You’re welcome,” he explained simply.

“My hero,” this time she rolled her eyes at him. “Come on, we gotta finish hanging these streamers.”

Grumbling, they returned to their assigned job.


“Let’s get this party started!” Kat screamed, raising her cup in the air. Somebody turned the volume up, and the crowd cheered, the apartment filling with music. She kissed Haz and dragged him into the middle of the room, dancing with him.

Tom smiled at his friends enjoying themselves. He took a sip of his drink, his eyes wandering the room before they landed on her. She was wearing a short black dress, hair cascading down her back. She was tipsy but moved with confidence in her heels. He watched her hips swinging in time to the beat of the song, her arms above her head. He admired the curves of her body, very evident in the confines of the tight fabric. It wasn’t long before some guy was behind her, his hands on her hips. She was unfazed, grinding against him. She spun around in his arms, her own coming down over his shoulders. As she moved closer towards him, Tom looked away, filled with a strange resentment.

He left the room, in search of more alcohol to distract him from this unwanted feeling.


She needed a drink. She had been dancing for what felt like hours and was desperately thirsty. Squeezing past the swaying bodies she made it to the kitchen. She noticed Tom leaning against the counter, talking to another guest. She moved towards the island bench across from him and grabbed a bottle, pouring some soda into a cup. She guzzled it down.

“All that grinding made you thirsty, huh?” he asked, more bitterly than he intended.

Putting the cup down she frowned, “What’s that supposed to mean?”


“It clearly means something.”

A thought dawned on her.

“Are… are you… jealous?” she asked in disbelief.

“Are you kidding? Why the hell would I be jealous?” he scoffed. He took a gulp of his drink.

“Fine,” she shrugged her shoulders, not really caring. “Where’s your bathroom?”

“Down the hall to the left.”

She nodded her head once and pushed past party-goers in the direction he had advised.

In the bathroom she checked herself in the mirror. She tousled her hair, mind going back to her chat with Tom. What was up with him? Shaking her head, she rummaged through her purse for the tube of lipstick. Finding it, she removed the lid and applied a fresh coat. She pressed her lips together, evening out the colour. Just as she popped the lid back on, the door opened.

“Occupied,” she called out.

“It’s me,” Tom stepped in, closing the door behind him.

“Oh. I was just leaving anyway.”

Zipping up her purse, she took one final glance at the mirror.  She saw Tom in the corner of her eye and bit her lower lip. He was wearing a black tee emphasising the muscles in his arms. His jaw was clenched and she noticed how sharp it was. She swallowed.

“Am I making you nervous?” he asked curiously.

“Of course not,” she forced herself to make eye contact, hoping she exuded more confidence than she was feeling.

“You seem nervous,” he took a step towards her.

She took a step back.

“Why would I be nervous? If I recall correctly, you were the one who sounded jealous earlier. Do I make you nervous?” she countered, trying to gain the upper hand.

“Not at all, and that wasn’t jealousy,” he continued to move towards her.

“What was it then?” her back hit the wall.

He was standing awfully close now. He filled her senses, sight, smell, hearing. She met his stare, refusing to look away first.

“It was frustration.”

“At what?” she almost whispered.

“At wanting to do this.”

He cupped her face and crashed his mouth against hers. Once she recovered from her initial shock, she found herself kissing him back. The rigidity of her body seeped away as they melded into each other. She reached up and wrapped her hands around his neck, pulling him closer. His hands dropped down to her back where they slipped further lower to her ass.

He lifted her up effortlessly and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Their kiss was messy and passionate as everything they had been holding in came flooding out. He sat her on the edge of the sink and stood between her legs with his hands on her thighs. Her dress had ridden up and the heat of his palms seared her bare skin. He slid one hand up and gripped her hip while the other remained on her leg. He leaned forward, pushing her back and she threw an arm behind to find a purchase to support herself. She accidentally knocked over a bottle but they barely noticed it clattering to the floor. Her legs hugged his waist she gripped his shoulder with her right hand.

Needing a breath, Tom broke the kiss, moving his lips down her jaw to her neck. Her head fell back, exposing her throat and she let out a moan as he found her sweet spot. She tangled her fingers in the curls at the nape of his neck, her other arm snaking back over his shoulder. She was lost in bliss. She was breathing heavily, her chest rising and falling.

“Tom,” she moaned his name. Egged on by the sounds falling from her lips, he brought a hand up and slipped the spaghetti strap from her shoulder. He kissed down past her collarbone and along the soft skin of her shoulder.

All of a sudden there was a knock at the door.


It was Haz.

“Fuck,” Tom cursed, as they separated. He stepped back and went to the door, not looking at her.

She, in turn, slipped off the sink and wiggled her dress back down to an appropriate length. She pushed her hair out of her face and turned to the mirror above the sink. Her lipstick was smeared across her mouth and her cheeks were flushed.

He opened the door.

“Yes, mate?” annoyance in his tone.

Haz’s mouth fell open in surprise when he saw Tom, but then he noticed her in the bathroom behind him. He smirked.

“Uh, you’ve got a little something…,” he repeated his words from earlier in the day.

“Huh?” Tom walked over to the sink where she was still standing.

He too, had her lipstick smudged over his mouth and chin. He dropped his head, shaking it.

“Wait ‘til I tell Kat,” Haz said gleefully, running off in the direction of the living room.

She looked at Tom. Then she went to the door and closed it. He turned to her when he heard the click of the lock.

“What are you doing?”

“We weren’t done.”

Tagging: @spideyontherun 

Dear Harry,

How’re things? Hope Ron and Hermione are well. I hear Gryffindor won the last Quidditch match against Slytherin. And that someone nearly knocked Lucius Malfoy’s prancing son off his broom while catching the snitch. Great work, kid. James would be so proud.

My godfatherly duties compel me to make sure you’re finishing your homework and all that rubbish but honestly, just try not to get yourself killed or piss off McGonagall, and we’ll call it a day, yeah?

Glad you like the photos I sent you. In case you were wondering, the third one in the pile was from your dad’s bachelor party; pole dancing isn’t normally my thing but it was a dare and I pocketed about fifteen galleons that night and impressed one of the muggle waitresses, so it was worth it.

Can’t tell you exactly where I am at the moment for obvious reasons but it’s a hell of a lot better than that cave; I haven’t resorted to eating rats for at least two weeks. And glory, glory, hallelujah, this place has indoor plumbing.

I’ve been keeping quiet, mostly as Snuffles, but I did nick an iPhone off a bus stop bench a few weeks back and it’s full of mildly interesting useless shit that wastes your time, which is something. And it’s got a camera, which is also something. You’re probably familiar with muggle video cameras, but I’d never seen one myself–dementors aren’t the best cinematographers.

Accidentally got too ahead of myself and used up all the “memory” after I left the thing running. I’ve heard you can delete “files” but I’ve tried every spell in the book and the closest I got was making a photo I’d taken of some floorboards quack and momentarily disappear. Did manage to shoot this, though.

Don’t worry; no one knew I’d broken into the house. They won’t miss their pound of frozen chicken; they had three more and now I’m set for a few days. And I doubt they’ll notice one pair of missing socks. Couldn’t help myself; they’re some sort of fluffy cotton. An obnoxious shade of orange, but beggars can’t be choosers.

Talk soon. Stay cool, kid,



Waltzing (s1/s3)

I know this has probably been done many times before, but honestly, I just couldn’t resist. Just look at the difference in the way they act towards each other. In first season. Carmilla is trying to impress Laura, because she’s already head over heels for her. And Laura is trying not to show just how big her crush on Carmilla actually is. They’re both skirting around each other, testing the waters. Then there’s third season. They think one or both of them might die tomorrow. And all they have for each other is love. They just want to be close to each other.

Ice Cream Mishap

Prompt: "I work at an ice cream stand and you came up and got some ice cream except you didn’t realize that rocky road has nuts in it which you’re apparently allergic to???? so now i’m dragging your sorry ass to the hospital all bc you don’t know your ice cream flavors.“ Modern AU.

Word Count: 1,998.

A/N: Came upon this prompt on here, and you best believe I had to write something based off of it. Hope you enjoy!

Keep reading

Holy fucking shit.

Outlast 2 is hard to stomach.

The wolf and the hound

Pairing: fem. Stark reader x Sandor Clegane

Warning: FLUFF & SMUT

Hi guys! The first version of this story wasn’t saved and my other version somehow wasn’t uploaded by tumblr…  I’m unsatisfied with this new version but I still hope you enjoy it. Have fun!

Accompanying your half-brother Jon to King’s Landing wasn’t something you really wanted to do. But after the meeting with Cersei, you all saild back again, and all of you were kind of satisfied. Cersei promised your half-brother and queen Daenerys to fight with them against the white-walkers, and this was a big success for everyone of you. And on your trip to King’ Landing you were able to find a few new friends, like Davos Seaworth with whom you talked about your and his family. He was patient and kind towards you, and you also liked Brienne, who had protected your sister Sansa from Ramsay Bolton. 

But you also discovered that Sandor Clegane, known as the hound, was a nice person as well, although he didn’t liked to show it. But when the two of you were all alone, he always listened to your stories, even when they were boring. When the wind was too cold, he always gave you his coat and sometimes also shared his wine with you. So it happened that you fell in love with him. It was naive, you knew that very well, and of course, you struggled with your own feelings. But Sandor wasn’t as bad as everyone thought. 

As he decided to stay the whole day in his cabin, you thought it could be a good idea to visit him. You knocked at his door.
“Sandor? Its me, (Y/N). Can I come in?” He said nothing, but instead opened his door. 
“What do you want?” His voice was harsh, he definitely was in a grumpy mood, but you knew that he wasn’t angry about you. 
“Talking”, you replied with your cutest smile, entered his room and closed the door behind you. You sat down on his bed while he stood in front of you. 
“How was your night?”, you asked.
“Is everything alright, Sandor?” Your voice was soft.
“Yes”, he mumbled. 
“I am worried about you.” He started to laugh. 
“Me? Why in the seven hells would you be worried about me?”

Keep reading


A/N: Thank the lord @dancingalone21 was kind enough to give me an extension on her challenge because it’s been absolutely insane in my office the last couple of weeks. At first, this piece gave me a really hard time, but when I finally figured out where I wanted it to go, I fell in love with it and with the city I’d spent so much time learning about. I hope you all love it. This one is for you, Lau. Enjoy :)

PS: For the sake of this fic, just pretend Danneel doesn’t exist. No disrespect or hate intended in any way, shape, form or fashion.

Pairing: Jensen X Reader

Word Count: 4300

Warnings: RPF, cursing, fluff, mentions of smoking weed, of smut, and of prostitution (It’s Amsterdam, so it’s got to be a little wild)

Summary: Just when the reader thinks she has Jensen all figured out, he comes up with a surprising way to prove there are still a few things she doesn’t know about him…one of which is a secret that could change her life forever. 

Originally posted by r-e-t-l-e-h-s

Jensen pulled the folded pieces of paper from the pocket of his jeans and placed them on the table between them, smiling widely when she lifted one eyebrow and then narrowed her eyes at him, trying to figure out what the hell he was up to now. She reached one hand across the table, eyeing him suspiciously as she did so, and cautiously picked up the papers, turning them slowly as she studied the outside of them.  

Jensen shook his head and rolled his eyes jokingly before jerking his chin towards the papers. “Just open the damn thing, Y/N. It’s not going to bite.” 

“What is it?”

“If I tell you, that takes all the fun out of it. Now, if you’d quit eyeballing me like that and just do what I told you to do, you’d find out.”

“You’re a pain in my ass - you know that, right?” She huffed playfully and crossed her arms, purposely avoiding his gaze.

Keep reading

Abducted - 1

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Summary: you were a normal person with a very normal life until you were abducted by a strange man.

A/N: ANGST!!! Here’s to hoping this series would get some love and people will like it. it’s a really dark introductory part. The series will be dark but will have some fluff. hope you like it!

Warnings: being hit, pain, being chained, abduction, wounds.

Word Count: 1653

Part 2

‘thank you!’ you gave the cashier a tired smiled and got out of the store. the day had been tiring, all you wanted to do was collapse in your bed and get something to eat. You were never comfortable to eat when people were around you. you just never liked the feeling of people’s eyes on you. so, with an empty stomach and tired eyes you made your way to the car.

The night was warm, the air felt thick that day. With not much of a breeze blowing, everything was dead silent. You liked the quiet, you could let your mind wander in the silence and think of great things or truly freighting ones.

A crackle of leaves pulled you out of your thoughts. You had thought you were alone there. With slightly furrowed eyebrows you looked around and found no one in sight. Maybe it was the wind? You continued walking on the empty street before you heard the noise again. you stopped and took in a sharp breath. Something was wrong.

‘always trust your instincts. if you thing something’s wrong, it is.’ You recalled the words you had probably heard or read somewhere. You clenched your jaw, tightened your grip of the brown bag in your hands and started pacing towards your car. You started to count to distract yourself from the scary thoughts.


Someone was following you. you were sure now, you didn’t look back just picked up the pace.


You were running, but the footsteps followed. Your heart thumped as they neared.


‘Shit!’ you cursed under your breath as you fell.


You were struck with something in the back of the head.

  Blue disrupted your vison, you couldn’t tell if you were breathing for it was becoming so difficult. You tried to crawl but your senses betrayed you. you kept a hand on where you had been struck and with the last of your strength turned over to face your attacker. A tall man in green, an image you remember before your head made contact with the gravel and everything turned pitch black.

You were waking up, coming back to your senses. You shot your eyes open and immediately regret it as the bright lights burned your eyes. You rubbed the back of your head, the blow had been quiet hard and you could still feel a sharp pain. you groaned with closed eyes and slumped against the wall. You opened your eyes when you realized that this all was not a bad dream. It was a living nightmare. You started panicking as you looked around. You were in a warehouse, and as anyone with common sense would know a warehouse was never a good place to wake up at. with more examining you saw that you were in a basement with a scanty amount of furniture and a makeshift bed which you had been laying on.

Why would someone wish to abduct you out of everyone in the world? You weren’t important or filthy rich, then why?

You were overwhelmed, so many thoughts and possibilities were shouting in your mind. it all fell silent once you heard those familiar footsteps again.

There he was, the tall man in green. Raven hair slicked back, a dagger in hand, an attractive sharp face with piercing green eyes, he strutted towards you. he dawned a weird, ancient looking outfit of emerald green, black and gold.

‘hello, human.’ He tucked in the dagger and smiled at you almost tauntingly. He knelt to your level and you shuffled backwards. You could only do so to some extent for a chain around your ankle had you trapped. ‘ah, I apologise for that but you see it was quite necessary.’ He smirked. ‘now, let’s not waste much time.’ He looked at you intently and you gulped. ‘see, I have some plans and I can’t ensue them without assistance of someone like you.’ he explained and you listened for you had no other option. ‘so, think of yourself as my slave. A mere pawn I’ll be pushing around and using to do certain things. If you wish to live without being harmed, you do what I ask.’ He got up. ‘I shall talk to you later.’ He said before leaving.

You were frightened. You had never felt such fear in your life before. What did he plan to do? You brought your knees close to your chest and buried your head in your hands, hoping for the best, waiting for what had to come, you let out a quiet sob. He returned after a while and you looked at him.

‘hungry, human?’ he asked.

‘(y/n).’ you muttered. You were numb now, you didn’t feel anything now. If you were going to be here and possibly die, you might as well do it courageously.

‘what?’ he stepped forwards.

‘(y/n).’ you stated clearly. ‘my name is (y/n). not human.’ You looked directly in his eyes.

‘so, the kitten has claws,’ he grinned and brought his face close to yours. you didn’t move. ‘I like that.’ He looked in your eyes for a while and moved back. ‘let’s not get off topic, I want you to cook something. for the both of us.’ he snapped his fingers and the chain was unlocked. Your eyes grew wide, you had anticipated the situation wrongly.

  ‘it better be good.’ He started walking and motioned you to follow. It was hard to keep up with him with his long legs. The warehouse was completely different upstairs, it seemed like a well decorated house.

 No one could say it was a warehouse until they ignored the royal bed and furniture, heaps of book and the little cooking area. The only thing that gave it away were the old, blackening walls.

‘there.’ He said sternly and motioned towards the ‘kitchen’. You nodded and made your way to the kitchen. He did have quite a lot of supplies and even that grocery bag of yours. you made your favourite soup and toasted some bread. Fearing ‘his royalty’ wouldn’t be impressed by just that, you made a brownie in a mug and set it all in a tray for him and in the bowls for yourself.

You found him reading a book, sat in the chair and table near his bed. you kept the tray on the table and took a few steps bac. ‘wait,’ he kept the book down. ‘eat some of it first.’ He ordered and you obeyed. As you took the first bite you realised how hungry you were. You hadn’t eaten for so long. After tasting it all he motioned you to step back. He ate some of the soup and quirked his brows. ‘I am impressed.’ He looked at you. ‘you can go now, mortal.’ He said and you left.

With some food finally in your belly, you rested your head against the wall. Sorrow after some time fades, what scares you no longer is scary when you accept it. you weren’t scared now, just hollow. Hollowness was all you felt, all that occupied your little hell, your basement.

You were listening to the man, listening to his footsteps, his little movements, the flipping of pages, god you missed music. You would hear to your favourite songs and bad days would feel good. But it might so happen that you would never be able to hear to music again, made you realise that there were so many normal things you won’t be able to do now. You couldn’t live like that.

The bed’s dipping and a long silence that followed signified that he was asleep. It was your chance, a chance to possibly escape. But he could catch you and the situation might worsen.

You had to do something. you took in deep breath and stood up. you were going to escape. You tiptoed upstairs and found him asleep. You kept the bowl and plate aside and started to look for an exit when you saw a high window. You swiftly started climbing and reached it, this was it, you just had open the window now. You glanced at him and is motionless form assured you that you could go on. You started to unscrew the bolts when suddenly a force made you fall. But you never made contact with the floor.

‘you foolish, foolish girl.’ The man’s voice taunted. you were in his arms but he was also lying on the bed. the twin of the man vanished and you were left more confused. He carried you back to the basement. ‘tell me mortal,’ he asked, sarcasm evident in his voice. ‘did you really think you could escape?’ you didn’t reply. You feared this might have agitated him and it could mean some serious trouble for you.

‘i-I’ you tried to speak but the words won’t come out.

‘hush.’ He sat you on the dirty mattress and didn’t turn away his patronising gaze from you. he put the chain on your ankle again. your heart sank, you were back where you started. ‘I am Loki, the god of mischief. It will take a lot more than these little attempts to fool me.’ he said and moved closer. ‘you are not going away anywhere. Not unless I want you to. And trust me,’ he started walking away. ‘you are going to be here for a very long time.’ He stopped by the stairs. ‘sleep.’ he said and turned off the lights before leaving.

You punched the wall and threw your head back, you wanted to scream, you wanted to break free. But you couldn’t. you were trapped. You were, a personal hound now, a slave. you didn’t know anything else but this. !. you were abducted 2. The man who had abducted you was apparently the god of mischief, Loki. 3. He had some plans he wanted your help for. 4. There was no way to escape this.

TAGS: @marvel-fanfiction, @yikesbuckster

EXO’s Reaction to your sick dance moves



*Pleasantly surprised. He knew you dance but this is the first time he’s seen it live. Needless to say, he loved it and sometimes gets distracted during a performance thinking about it.*

“Damn…she’s really, really good. I wonder if she’d give me a personal show, if you know what I mean..”

Originally posted by exoturnback


*Loves your dancing, whether it was to be ridiculous of professional. He shows his love from the side lines or sometimes even on stage.*

“No matter how professional she looks, I am always going to show her love with this dance.”

Originally posted by scattereddaydreams


*Both proud and impressed. He’s seen you dance a few times before but this was something different. He loved it when you danced and love it even more when you invite him to join.*

“We’re so in sync. Everyone, this is my girl. Isn’t she wonderful? I can go on talking but I don’t want to distract you all from her amazing dance moves.”

Originally posted by r-velvets


*He challenged you to a dance battle, not knowing that you were one hell of a dancer. Just when he thought he was going to get the last laugh, he was wrong. You were going easy on him all this time.*

“How dare she lead me on? How dare she make me think that she can’t dance? She made me look like a fool! Well jokes on her, I sing better…”

Originally posted by moontaevhyung


*Has no idea what happened. All he knew, you didn’t know how to dance and now, it looked like you found some new powers. He doesn’t show it but he wants you to teach him.*

“What…wha…how did you-? What happened?”

Originally posted by starry-hun


*You never really told him you were a professional dancer, so, when Baekhyun challenged you to dance and you kicked his butt, he’ll be surprised for a while.*

“Wow babe. That was..quite a show…Where um..where did you learn to dance like that?”

Originally posted by sehunsyixing


*He knew you danced very well. So, when Chanyeol pointed at you and declared a dance battle, he was sitting in the back, phone in hand and video taping while holding in his laughter for Chanyeol’s inevitable defeat.*

“He has absolutely no idea what is about to hit him. I love (Y/n) so much.”

Originally posted by daenso


*Shocked and slightly mad that you never even thought to tell him you had godlike dancing powers. In his mind, two dancers make the ultimate couple. So, every time you danced in front of him, he’d give you a look (like the gif).*

“Look at her. Look at her dancing. She never even told me that was that good. If I had known, we would be unstoppable.”

Originally posted by intokai


*100% smug. A bit ticked off that you never told him but to cover it up, he pretended that he was still better. In his mind, you were at his level already.*

“Pshhh….You still have a long way to go if you wanted to be better than me.”

Originally posted by loveholic198



So a thing that’s happening in my head lately is the realization of just how violent eating disorder behaviors are. Like it’s just now hitting me how deadly this stuff can potentially be. Like really hitting. It’s not JUST exercising way too much with way too little fuel, it’s the exact fucking stepping stones every single dead person with an eating disorder stepped across. These are the steps you take to fucking die and there’s no way around the absolute barbaric type violence in that.

I’ve just been thinking a lot about how long I’ve been depriving my body of the shit it needs to survive and I mean…damn honestly. I’m so impressed at how well my health is holding up in the face of all this. I mean, it is far from ideal but FUCK like…given the circumstances? This body is dependent on me and me alone and I have really been failing it yet…it’s still…been taking care of me through everything? Thank you, body for sticking around. I know I’ve forced you to work like hell to just keep me alive and I am so sorry. It shouldn’t have been so difficult. Like every time I get that tunnel vision dizzy thing when I stand up, every time I’m sitting in a 75 degree room covered in blankets because I’m fucking cold, every tiny little symptom I notice…it just makes me so sad anymore. I just can’t normalize it anymore. It is so far from okay. I keep imagining my body as kind of a separate being from me altogether, like I’m it’s mother or something and so every time I feel bad it’s just beginning to sound like my body telling me…how much it hurts? How much I’m failing it? And I think at this point, I’m beginning to have sympathy for my body. Which is a new thing entirely. But I mean, just LOOK at what all I’ve subjected it to. I feel bad for it I think? I just want to take care of it for once. Let it rest yknow?

Plan B / Jerome Valeska Fanfiction (Part 1)

So, this is a oneshot but I might write more parts, if you people would like that. Let me know after reading.

Words: 2200

Warnings: Smut; Things Jerome Does For Fun

Originally posted by kristieltrips

You sit at your desk at the Gotham Gazette Office. You have been working here for a few months now, just when you first came to Gotham. Your job is to write the daily news reports, since that is the least wanted job and they had to hire you. Why did they have to hire you? Well, you gathered, let’s say, interesting information on your boss after being told to „fuck off“ after saying something „offensive“ in the job interview. Anyhow, that guy just didn’t want to see his family of two children and a gorgeous wife to find out he is having sex with college twinks.

You arrived in Gotham after running away from your parents’ home as you turned 18 and finished high school. Nobody wants to live in a small town, nothing exciting ever happens around there. Also your famil, oh, your family… those people aren’t exactly a pleasure to be around. Gotham cought your attention quickly. Interesting things happening every other day.

It is five o'clock, two hours to go. You are currently writing your report about the so-called „Maniax“. They threw a bunch of guys off the roof of your office building and everybody around you is acting like this isn’t something to happen in good old Gotham. You have lived here for only a few months and you can say you have written articles on the craziest murderers at least two times each week but no: Those things would never happen in Gotham!

What confuses everybody around you, though you don’t understand what’s the deal with it, is that stories about death and murder and violence never disturbed you; Maybe you even found just those stories intriguing. With that, your interest in the Maniax is rather high up there. The minute you heard of them you looked up the group, then looked up information about the members. You found out the most about Greenwood, the cannibal who killed and ate a bunch of women, whom you think to be boring, and Valeska. Jerome Valeska, to be exact. You shocked your co-workers with your first reaction to seeing a picture of him was to say „Isn’t he cute!“ under your breath. You reconstructed their view of you by saying „cute but psycho“ afterwards.

Do you really think Valeska is a psychopath? No, you don’t. Not many have read his background story but you know it up to small details about his childhood. Valeska’s childhood was the thing you could understand the outcome of. You even are impressed he stood his non-murderous ground for so long before escalation. Truly, you admire the ways of Valeska. Who would not be intrigued by his full on charming character? You haven’t even heard or seen much of him but on the day of the roof incident you were the first person to go outside and check out the situation. You got to hear a second of that fabulous laugh.

You left work early today to catch your bus home. You still think about the article you finished and all the lies you told to not disturb the readers, like that you think the Maniax are madmen and their actions are absurd. You don’t think that. You are impressed with them.

Funny, just after the guy attacked that busload of cheerleaders you take the bus instead of a train. The busses are emptier these day, aren’t they? You shrug to yourself and listen to your music again.

But I’m a creep.

I’m a weirdo.

What the hell am I doing here?

I don’t belong here.

The bus stops in a heartbeat. People are starting to panic reminding themselves of the earlier attack, while you chuckle to yourself. How unlikely would it-

„Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen!“ Oh, damn. There he stands, your adorable murder carrot. You look around you to see horrified faces of the other people, though you keep quietly chuckle to yourself.

„If you don’t know, what I have to say would be disappointing, I am Jerome. I’m the pretty head of the Maniax, our little gang!“ He laughs a little, looking at all the scared businessmen and students on the bus. Looking right in your face he stops grinning.

„How’s it come you are not afraid of me…?“ He gestures to you to tell your name.

„Y/N Y/L/N.“ You smile back at him.

„Well, Y/N, tell me what is so amusing?“

People start looking at you like you’re crazy. You are not crazy. „Well, handsome, seeing these people wetting themselves amuses me just as much as it amuses you.“ You don’t know where all that confidence suddenly comes from. You chuckle at his silent smile. „Am I making you speechless, Valeska?“

He walks up to you, still smiling and gestures to you to stand up, and so you do. He take your hand and guides it to his lips, not breaking eye contact. It sends a shiver down your spine.

„So, beautiful, will you help me with this then?“ He cocks and eyebrow at you. You smile and nod and he guides you to the front of the bus where that other Maniax guy, Helsinger is his name, is holding a gun to the bus driver’s head.

„Aaron, would you kindly?“ Jerome tells him and hold out his hand. Aaron puts the gun into said hand. „Have you shot a gun before, Y/N?“ You shake your head, a little embarrassed. „Well, then…“

Jerome stands behind you, the gun now in your hand, and holds the hand you’re holding the gun with. His other hand rests on your waist. How is this feeling so natural?Jerome rests his chin on your shoulder and whispers into your ear. „Which one do you want to practice on?“

You look around „I spy with my little eye…“, you spot just the right man for this, „something that is blue.“ You chuckle and Jerome eyes the man in the blue suit who looks somewhat like your boss. Jerome turns your bodies to face the man and Jerome’s chest is pressed to your shoulderblades. The sounds of police sires hum in a distance.

„Hurry a little, doll.“ Jerome tells you. You put your finger on the trigger. „Three… Two… One-“ before he finishes speaking out the last digit you pull the trigger and take in the horrified screeches around you. Satisfying. Adrenaline pumps through your body and Jerome rips you through the bus doors with him. You run off towards smaller streets.

„What about the other ones?“ You ask.

„They’ll figure something out.“ Jerome laughs again. „You were absolutely grand, Y/N!“ You laugh with him. „You said your name, though. Guess you have to come to a safer place with me and the others, huh?“

„I guess so!“ You laugh back at him.

As you are waiting in an alley, Helsinger and Greenwood pick you up in their truck. You and Jerome sit in the backseat together, though you are no longer holding his hand. He looks out of the window, deep in thoughts, probably. When did his mood change so drastically? You attempt something to turn his attention right back at you, just where you want his attention to be. You move a little closer to him and think of yourself as risky and reckless. You put your hand on his knee and move your mouth close to his ear.


His gaze turns to the front again, you barely in his view. „Yes?“

You whisper. „Will you fuck me?“

Arriving at Gallavan’s penthouse, Jerome pulls you into his bedroom in an instant. The second he closes and locks the door, he slams your body against the door and presses against you.

„So, doll, you stay with us for a while?“ He whispers into your direction, his eyes skipping between you eyes and lips.

„Uh-huh.“ You breathe out.

In that second he slams his lips against yours. You move yours in sync with his. Jerome takes your hand and pins them above your head and he begins kissing down your neck. You throw your head against the wall, trying to breathe steadily.

„What do you want me to do to you, doll?“ He breathes against your neck inbetween kisses and nibbles.

„I told you on the ride home, Valeska.“ You hagger out. Jerome groans against you skin.

„I want to make you scream my name, doll. Keep calling me by my surname and not much will happen, you know?“

„We will see, won’t we, Valeska?“ You let out a purposefully erotic moan. Jerome bites your neck at that. He moves one hand to your shirt and opens the first few buttons. He lets his hand glide under your bra. „See, Valeska, I can call you what I want and you still can’t contain yourself, you know?“

He moves his lips to your ear as you shiver beneath him. „Ha, Ha, Ha!“ He whispers into your ear. You bite your lip. „Well then, I might just go on anyways, huh?“ He answers and squeezes your nipple lightly, making you let out a whimper.

„Let go of my hands.“ You demand. He listens to you.

„Anything for my beautiful, beautiful doll.“

Now being able to use your hands, you move one to his belt, letting the other lie around his shoulders. You unbuckle his belt and open the zipper. Jerome chuckles and moves his lips to yours for a few seconds before switching to your collarbone. Meanwhile you let your hand slip inside his trousers and you start palming him through his boxers, which makes Jerome groan.

He places his hands on your butt and thighs and whispers „Jump.“ which you obey. His lips find yours again, but you don’t change the position your hand is in, you only move it underneath his boxers.

Jerome walks you two to the bed and throws you off onto it. You look at him take off his shirt. He throws it on the ground. You move your hand in a stop-motion.

„Why, What is it, Y/N?“ He looks scared for a second.

„I just want to admire what I can see. Save it in my spank-bank, you know?“ You grin. Jerome jokingly poses before he straddles you, his hands holding him above your body. He kisses you again.

„Take off this shirt.“ He tells you inbetween kisses and so you do. You also throw away your bra while you’re at it. Jerome kisses down your body until he reaches your beltline. He looks into your eyes while he pulls down your jeans and underwear in one motion and throws the clothes onto the pile of his.

He starts kissing your thighs and throws them over his shoulders. He inches towards your sex and when he reaches it he places a kiss on it. He starts licking your clit, listening to your moans.

„You taste really good, you know?“ He mumbles. You grab a handful of his hair, which makes him grin against your body.

As the moans start to get quicker he stops. You look down at him and see him biting his lip. He kicks off his trousers as well and jerks his member a few times before placing him at your entrance. He comes down to kiss you and ushes into you. After a few thrusts you decide to switch positions. You throw your bodies around and sit on top of him and start riding him. He holds your waist and you rest your hands on his chest. You start moaning again as you ride him. He puts his right hand to the back of your head on shoves your face to his and attacks your lips again, groaning against them.

„You feel really good, Valeska.“ You whisper rather mischieviously.

You don’t want to give him what he wants, you screaming „Jerome!“ but soon enough you can’t help it anymore, since you felt yourselef getting closer to the edge.

„Fuck, Jerome!“ You let out, followed by more loud moans. He grins against your mouth. He stops kissing you and leaves his mouth open against yours. You take in his groans and whispers of cursewords while he thrusts up into you a few times as he is spilling his cum into you.

A moment later you get off of him and lie down in his bed. He sits at the edge for a few minutes, just… staring at the floor. You find it interesting, seeing him think.

„What are you thinking about, Jerome?“ You ask. He turns and crawls to you. He lies down next to you and puts an arm around you.

„I was thinking about what I would have missed out on if I had chosen to burn down that old-folks-home…“ He kisses your head. You close your eyes and rest your head on his chest. He pulls the covers over your bodies. He starts speaking again just before you fall asleep.

You, I like. You have to stay.“ You look up at him and smile.

„Nothing’s better than that, if you ask me.“



We have now officially reached the drunk enough to say shit you ort notta said part of the evening. And we have so many new people showing up, and said to myself, damn self, there are so many pretty people showing up tonight. And then I realized why: it is because LITERALLY EVERYBODY HERE IS ATTRACTIVE

I am not making this up. When objectively removing existing friendships and awkwardness and social niceties and power imbalances and general Reasons It Is A Bad Idea, I would most definitely bang everybody in this building.

So naturally before making suhc a statement I needed to double check the entire roster. And make sure I wasn’t leaving somebody out or making someone feel bad. Or anything like that, because even if I didn’t want to bang you all I still almost entirely like y'all and don’t want to cause no hurt feelings. We’re still a family and I still love you okay? But I went down the whole list and. I was right. Literally. Everybody. At Overwatch. Is like 100% bangable. Some over 100%.

For the purposes of this I am leaving Bastion and Orisa off the list. Because Orisa is a youngun and probably doesn’t have a grasp on such things yet and Bastion seems to be like… three? Four maybe? Mentally? I mean given that we just had to explain porn I think there maybe issues with the concept of sex, much less consent. But it’s definitely not just an omnic thing, as you will see.

So look. We’re gonna go straight down the fuckin list and I will Mathematically Prove This To All Of You.

Keep reading

Bowling for Love (Ben Platt x Reader) [Slight Smut]

A/N: so, after the fic that was the definition of angst and emotional hell (i like to be evil sorry) i have given you all this so that you hopefully don’t write too many death threats. hope you enjoy! requests are open and love you all!

TW: slight smut, mention of a boner, cursing towards the end.

Request:  A combined 22 and 7 for a ben platt fic would be cool!

7: “am i supposed to be impressed?”

22: “are you sure you two aren’t married?”

Will Roland had set up a bowling party for you since you had just become the new stage manager. It was a fun little party, and you couldn’t be happier. You leaned back and groaned, “I still can’t believe we got through that matinee. You people are gonna kill me before my time with all your joking around.”

Ben chuckles, “am I supposed to be impressed?”

You shoved his shoulder, “you should. You wouldn’t last a day in my job. Especially not with these crazies of a cast.” They all laughed and nodded at the truth of the statement.

“Oh yeah, well you couldn’t do my job either, you’d never survive.”

“I never said I could.” You and Ben had been friends since you were kids, so he knew how to push your buttons in the most annoying ways.

“It sounded like you did. Do you want me to tickle you?” he held his hand up as a threat.

“You’d regret it. We both know I’m stronger than you.”

“Oh you are so dead.” His hand goes to your side and he tickles you as you fall to the floor. Lucky for you, you knew a tactic to make him stop. As soon as you were sitting on the floor, you pushed his hands away and basically ended up straddling him holding his hands down.

Will came up behind you two and laughed, “are you sure you two aren’t married? Cause it seems like you are. Also (Y/N), it’s your turn to bowl.” You smirk and get off of him to bowl. When you come back, you see Ben sitting back in his seat with his jacket in his lap and you giggle.

.         .         .

The rest of the party was normal until the end. You had gone to the bathroom and hear a knock on the door, “(Y/N), it’s me Ben. Open up. I need to talk to you.”

You open it quickly and he locks it behind him, “Jesus, you’re lucky I’d already pulled up my pants. Because you-”

He instantly pushed you against the vanity and pressed his lips to yours, hard. You hold his face in your hands and he pulls away, to rest his forehead on yours, “god… you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that…”

“Would it be since an hour ago when I gave you a boner?”

“Much much further back.” He kisses you again and this time it turns more heated. You sit on the vanity and wrap you legs around his waist to pull him closer. He eventually detaches his lips from yours and reattaches them on your neck. It was heavenly, you didn’t want this moment to end.

But as all things seem to be in this cast, the moment was ruined by Will knocking on the door, “Can you two stop fucking so we can go home? As much as we’d like to keep you here to make out. You have the car.” You giggle with him a little and get out of the bathroom of the bowling alley.


Imagine your boyfriend Pietro trying to beat your brother Barry in speed to try and get his approval (and to impress you)

Pietro: There is no way in hell I am losing to your brother. I’m blue, he’s red. We’re enemies!

Barry: Doesn’t your sister wear red? Like a lot.

Pietro: …True.


Barry: Okay so if you beat me then you get my approval, deal?

Pietro: Might as well five it to me now, I’m not gonna lose.

Barry: Game on.


Y/N: How much longer are you going to keep messing with him?

Barry: A while, he really wants my approval. And he already has it…but there’s no need to tell him just yet.

Y/N: I agree. Its kinda funny seeing him all flustered for a change.

hellyeahtitans67  asked:

Ok in a battle of the following relationship traits: Build up to First Kiss, First Impressions of Each Other, Most Adorable Family (AU or otherwise) and General Impact on the fandom culture; which couple wins in each category: RobStar vs KatAang?

Ow, that’s mean.

Build up to First Kiss:

Hilariously, neither one of the first kisses shown between either couple were their actual first kiss.  Starfire was just trying to download English and Aang was very sleep-deprived.

Aang’s dream-hallucination is a bit cheesy but he’s also very heartfelt and honest with his confession, and their actual first kiss a few episodes later is pretty damn epic.  I mean, it brings in the musical cue that is their romance theme, it’s on the verge of a great battle, Katara gives this dreamy “girlfriend” look at him…

…and he just plants a Now Or Never Kiss right on her, because he might not get to later.  Because he might die.  And he can’t do that without letting her know how he feels.  And she melts into it.

I’m gonna give the win to Kataang on this one, for the epic narrative background behind the why of this kiss.

But don’t get me wrong, Robin’s cute dorky attempt to befriend Starfire and his adorable confusion at her planting one on him is stellar.

First Impressions of Each Other:

FFFFFFFTTT–okay okay I’m gonna give this one to RobStar just because I am ridiculously hilaritized by and fond of their little scuffle right when they first meet.

And then Robin’s aforementioned complete confusion at Starfire kissing him and her absolute confusion about him being nice to her what is this what are you doing? and then the way they just sort of… fall in love and become really super-protective of each other right away?

Aang and Katara certainly had more positive impressions of each other when they met, with Katara fangirling him right off the bat and him practically asking her on a date right away and the two just becoming fast friends but aaaah I just love Robin and Starfire’s awkward blundering around each other all like, “WHAT IS THIS WHAT ARE YOU DOING I AM FEELING SOMETHING WHAT THE ACTUAL FRESH HELL.”

Most Adorable Family:

RobStar, no contest.

*pointedly ignoring Legend of Korra’s existence THEY HAD A WONDERFUL HAPPY FAMILY SHUT UP*

General Impact on Fandom Culture:

I’m not entirely sure what you mean by this?  RobStar certainly has a very big, very solid following, not surprisingly carrying over from and to the comics, and Dick’s relationship with Kory was super important to his character growth and development, sooo… I guess maybe it gets the win?

Kataang was very personally important to me as a shipper but we’re overshadowed by our main rival a looooooot and there’s not a lot of active fanwork-makers nowadays.  But that’s a whole can of worms I don’t need to go into.

  • ❝ What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday? ❞
  • ❝ I wish I could, but I don’t want to.  ❞
  • ❝ You have to stop the Q-tip when there’s RESISTANCE!  ❞
  • ❝ Crossed the line?! You’re so far past the line, you can’t even see the line! The line is a dot to you.  ❞
  • ❝ From now on, this chair is the one. You know what else is the one? My sweatpants!  ❞
  • ❝ No, you didn’t get me! It’s an electric drill, you get me, you kill me!  ❞
  • ❝ I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.  ❞
  • ❝ I’m not so good at the advice. Can i interest you in a sarcastic comment?  ❞
  • ❝ I fold like a cheap hooker that got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face.❞
  • ❝ We were on a break!!!!  ❞
  • ❝ You could not be more wrong. You could try, but you would not be successful. ❞
  • ❝ I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of sorrow and regret.  ❞
  • ❝ Gum would be perfection.  ❞
  • ❝ Ya know I can’t believe I even thought about getting back together with you! We are so over!  ❞
  • ❝ It bodes well for me that speed impresses you. ❞
  • ❝ I can’t believe I almost lost another girl because of counting!  ❞
  • ❝ Out of the blue!? This isn’t out of the blue! This is SMACK DAB IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BLUE!  ❞
  • ❝ Oh I’ll prove it, I’ll prove it like a theorem!  ❞
  • ❝ What the hell am I doing? You just broke my fridge!  ❞
  • ❝ Well my apartment isn’t there any more, because I drank it.  ❞
  • ❝ Okay, but there is a big difference, all right? You are a lot hotter than I am. ❞
  • ❝ I mean, isn’t that just kick you in the crotch spit on your neck fantastic?  ❞
  • ❝ When the package is this pretty, no one cares what’s inside. ❞
  • ❝ Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that’s ours!  ❞
  • ❝ It’s like there’s rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me. ❞
  • ❝ Wow! It looks like the Easter Bunny’s funeral in here.  ❞
  • ❝ Yes, we would like some more alcohol, and you know, we would like some more beers too…  ❞
  • ❝ You hung up on the pizza place? I don’t hang up on your friends.  ❞ 
impress me; continued

SUMMARIZED: So much floof.. Very much wow. I really hope I am doing okay at keeping Pete a little true to his onscreen persona, but this chapter turned out floofy as hell? Oops.. Sorry not sorry.. Anyway, this was mostly just cute couple filler. Enjoy babes!

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@theworldiscolorful @writergrrrl29 @gelinas22 @fan-fiction-galore @panic-angel3314 @lavitabella87 @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @wwesensualfanfics @flightofthefantasies @tvrnbvckle @calwitch @phyreblue @originalbish98 @xfirespritex @thirstiswet @chasingeverybreakingwave @indywrestlinglover-life @completely-madness @maryskahadeondawwe @wrasslin-x  @rocketgirl2410 @imnobodiesbitch @thegenericluchadora  @pennywritesthings if I forgot  you, please let me know??

Originally posted by 100proofvodka

Keep reading

Pushed Aside (Sherlock X Reader)

Originally posted by praisethesharp

(Gif is not mine. Originally posted by this user)

This was requested by anonymous:
I just rewatched the Irene Adler episode and I need something where Reader confronts Sherlock about being pushed to the side during the ordeal. (Bonus points if an unintended pregnancy can be worked into it)

Alright, ladies and gents, here we go!
Warning: A bit of swearing (only one or two curse words, I think, nothing absolutely horrible).

You sighed after his phone. Except the sighs were much different. The one that came from his phone came from the scum of the earth and was one of pleasure. Yours was one of pure annoyance.
Seventeen texts from Irene Adler this morning alone. Seventeen times that phone went off. Seven times you restarted your story. Ten times he didn’t ask you to continue. Just checked his phone.
He never replied. He told you so himself and you believed it, you never saw him type a word. But he checked it and that was enough to make your blood boil. It ruined your morning, it ruined your night the night before, it ruined your mood, and was in the process of ruining your relationship and sanity.
You had met Irene Adler in her home, as she flaunted around, naked, wearing nothing but a full face of makeup and heels that would have broken your feet in two seconds flat. You had to admit, if you looked like her you might walked about naked as well, but you didn’t (at least you didn’t think so). But it was worse when she shoved her nakedness right in Sherlock’s face, ignoring the fact that you, his wife, was sitting right there, watching it all.
John sensed your annoyance but Sherlock, however, did not. He put his phone back in his pocket, putting his hands in the prayer position underneath his chin and closing his eyes.
Thinking about the woman, you thought bitterly. No doubt about it.
The phone hadn’t made a sound in almost three hours (a new record!). Now was your chance.
Nervously, you sat in John’s chair, across from Sherlock. John was out getting the shopping, and Sherlock had been in a great mood all evening, so it was the perfect moment. It was as if all of the stars aligned.
“Hey.” You said, getting his attention. He stared at you, brow raised. He could tell you were nervous and he didn’t know exactly why.
“Hello.” He responded.
“Can we talk?”
“We’re talking right now.”
You cocked your head, trying not to smile. “You know what I mean, Holmes.”
“Yes, I know what you mean.” he nodded. You waited for him to say something, giving the ‘okay’ for you to continue. He did so with a nod.
“Oh, well…” You didn’t know how to word it, you hadn’t really planned how you were going to tell him.  “Well, I know we never really…..talked about….” you shrugged, still trying to find the words.
Just as you found them and quickly formulated a speech in your head, the phone moaned and his attention shifted.
“Hold that thought.” he said, quickly getting up and walking to the other side of the room to retrieve his mobile.
You didn’t hold that thought, though. You let the thought die and decided that you would tell him some other time when he was free from all distractions. You would just plan a doctor’s visit alone, go alone, and wonder if he’ll notice, or look up from the moaning phone as you walk in and out of 221B, ever-growing.
You rose from the chair, going back to your shared bedroom, trying to stop yourself from slamming the door loudly enough that he might notice.
“You alright?” John asked, sitting beside you on the couch, a drink in hand.
“Fine, why?”
“Well, you just…” he shrugged. “You’ve seemed upset the past few days. I just wanted to make sure you were alright.”
“I’m fine.” You answered shortly. John didn’t buy it, though.
“Is it about Irene?”
You didn’t answer which was all the answer he needed.
“Look, I understand that it’s annoying, but this is all going to blow over soon. This case will end and he’ll find another one that catches his attention.”
“Are you sure about that?” You wondered. “He does really seem to like her. Pushing me to the side just to check her texts, paying a lot of attention to her. He has to, knowing her measurements and all.” You argued.
“I’m sure he knows everyone’s, hers were just…relevant in the moment.” He said slowly. You sighed, leaning back against the couch.
“Are you worried? That he might come to like her more than you?”
“She did make quite the impression.” You answered. “And she’s much more interesting than I am.”
“(Y/N), Listen to me, if Sherlock Holmes falls in love with another woman then Hell would have frozen over. It doesn’t take a genius to see how in love he is with you.”
“I wish I could see it now.”
“Good morning.” Sherlock greeted you as you entered the kitchen the next day, still in pyjamas, hair a mess.
“Morning.” You said quickly, hoping you wouldn’t get interrupted again. You weren’t on Sherlock’s levels of observation by no means, but you picked up a few things. You could tell that Sherlock hadn’t slept much last night and his phone was in his back pocket as opposed to his jacket pocket-easier to get to.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Fine.” You nodded. You could feel his eyes following you as you made you breakfast.
“Are you alright?” He asked a bit hesitantly. He could tell you were upset.
“I’m fine.” You snapped. Honestly, you didn’t want to talk to him at all.
You two maintained eye contact. Sherlock was confused while you were furious. The phone hadn’t even gone off yet. Hormones, you guessed. But your anger was justified.
The phone moaned, as if on cue, and you took a deep breath.
“Liar.” He repeated. This time he didn’t even reach for his phone. You had his attention now, and you didn’t even want it. You huffed, turning back to your breakfast.
“(Y/N), what’s the matter.”
“What makes you think anything is wrong?” You asked, ready to debunk any reasons he might suggest, only to get him off of your back.
“You’re being very short-”
“I’m tired.”
“-you’re being incredibly passive-aggressive,”
“When am I not?”
“-and you have been trying to tell me something the past few days but you never finish. You’re nervous about something-something’s wrong and I would like to know what it is.”
“Well maybe if you paid attention to anyone but Irene Adler for the past few days you would be able to figure it out, genius.” You answered.
“That’s what this is about? Irene Adler? A case?”
“A woman.” You corrected him. “A woman who gets your attention every time she moans through your phone.”
“Oh, you know as well as I do that I didn’t set that as the text alert noise!”
“Well you haven’t changed it!” You yelled.
He stayed silent, not having an answer. You were right.
You took the opportunity to keep going.
“Since the moment Irene Adler walked in naked, flaunting her assets, you haven’t been able to pay attention to anything, or anyone else. I have been trying to tell you something. Something incredibly important, but every time, she texts you, and you just get up and leave. You look at the text and I’m left hanging. I don’t care that you look at them, if it’s really for the case, like you say, but I’ve been pushed aside this whole time. You’ve only cared about Irene Adler and whatever interesting things she’s been telling you. Those texts have got to be pretty damn good if you drop everything to read them.”
Silence, once again.
“If you like her more than you like me, I don’t blame you.” You told him honestly. “I think she’s downright horrible, but she’s interesting, better looking-”
“Beauty is a social construc-” He didn’t get to finish.
“-and all around a better fit for you. Just tell me and I can find somewhere for us to go.”
“’Us’?” Sherlock asked.
“Yes, ‘us’?”
“Who is ‘us’? Would you take John with you?” He asked.
“Then who?”
You only stared at him, watching his face go from pure, complete confusion, to revelation.
“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you for the past few days.”
“You’re pregnant?”
“That’s what Irene Adler was more important than.”
“Pregnant?” he asked quietly, almost as if he didn’t believe it. You had no idea how he would react-if he would be happy and excited, like you were, or upset, since it wasn’t really planned. The two of you never really talked about kids at length, but both of you agreed that, with Sherlock’s line of work, it might not be such a great idea.
You stared at each other, waiting for the other one to move or speak.
“Do you really, really think” Sherlock began slowly. “that I would choose Irene Adler over you?”
He looked hurt. Beyond hurt.
“Never.” He shook his head, taking small steps towards you. “Never in a million years.”
“Then why is she so interesting to you?” You wondered. It just didn’t make sense to you.
“Because she’s a case. She got the best of me, getting the photos back, and Mycroft told me not to get involved. I can’t help it, I have to take the case if it’s something Mycroft forbids.” he attempted to make you laugh. You weren’t as angry anymore, just confused, and you couldn’t help but crack a small smile at the childish mentality your husband had regarding his brother. “It’s an interesting case, I have to admit that. There’s much more to this case than meets the eyes, much more than I can see. But that’s all it is, (Y/N). That’s all she is. A case.
“And I’m sorry.” He apologized. “For not listening to you, I mean. I should have. I have no excuses for that.”
You didn’t know what to say. You just pressed your lips together and nodded.
“Are you alright?” He asked again. You only nodded. “I mean, with the baby. Everything’s fine? Nothing’s wrong?”
“Everything’s alright.” You nodded again. “Just a bit of morning sickness, but nothing too serious. I haven’t been to the doctor yet.”
“When do you go?”
“Monday.” You had made the appointment that previous evening, while Sherlock was out.
“I’ll clear my schedule for Monday, then.” He grinned.
“And you’re fine?” I asked.
“What with?”
“With the baby, I mean. I thought we agreed not to have kids. Not yet, anyway.” You were worried about his response and he thought about it for a few, agonizing seconds.
“It’s not something that we planned, (Y/N), and it’s a shock, one that’ll really hit me in a few minutes, I  believe, but we’ll be fine.” He walked closer to you, placing his hands on your shoulders, giving them a reassuring squeeze. “They’ll be loved, one of the most protected babies in Britain, and they’ll have the best mother in the world.” You rolled your eyes. “It’s true. You have a kind and gentle heart, they’ll adore you almost as much as we’ll adore them. I guarantee it.”
“And you know it all?” You asked.
“Of course I do. I’m Sherlock Holmes.” he joked. You swatted his chest.
“You’re an arrogant git.” You responded, gently pushing him away. “Now, let me make my breakfast. I’m starving.”
The phone moaned, but Sherlock didn’t leave your side, helping you prepare your morning meal and eating with you, both of you conversing without distraction.
I hope this is what you wanted. And I got the pregnancy in there!
Thank you so much for this request, I had so much fun writing it!
Requests are OPEN!