i am in denial about where i live

Time for a more personal post for Pride!
This is my first pride where Im comfortable with myself, the last few Ive been unsure/questioning. But this time around, i’ve learned a lot about myself.

My name is Lexi and I’m a transmasc enby, my pronouns are they/them or he/him aaand I’m super gay!!

But despite this being my first pride where im comfortable in my identity, I can’t express it or show it off. I live in the Southern US in a small town with small minded people, a handful of my family knows, sorta.. I think theyre in denial or ignore it. But I’m still very proud of myself, cause it took a lot for me to accept this about myself. So i know even though i cant go to the fun parades or events, I’m a part of this community and am proud to be. I do hope next year I can find my way to a place where I can safely go to these events!

So remember even if you can’t go to a Pride event, you’re still apart of this all! You’re apart of something big and strong. And I hope you all one day are able to express it safely with me.

Happy Pride everyone! Stay safe, and stay strong!


You cannot make me believe even for a second that this is the way that Natsu goes out. It’s too sappy and too crappy. 

We see the book disappear - momentary worry that he will disappear with it, but after the book is GONE completely he shows up, all smiles, they reunite, they talk of plans for the future, then what? Just puff? FUCK. NO. Call it denial but I refuse to believe it. I WILL NOT PANIC!

Mm-hm no, you ain’t trolling me this time Mashima. I wept at Gajeel going puff, I wept at Juvia’s sacrifice for Gray, you even had me on Makarov, but not this time, no. I will not buy into Natsu dying, not like this.

What? Am I suppose to believe Makarov made it somehow but Natsu won’t? Especially when you said Fairy Tail will have a happy ending? THIS IS NOT HAPPY ENDING MATERIAL, NOT GONNA BUY IT! 

What? Lucy is just gonna be left like that? Heartbroken she couldn’t save her best friend (future husband)? Aaah no?

And what? Am I suppose to believe the MAIN character dies with EIGHT WHOLE CHAPTERS LEFT OF THE MANGA? Hell NO? 

And with a big-baddie seemingly cracking it’s way back through the sky next chapter I am CERTAINLY not gonna believe Natsu, THE NATSU OF FAIRY TAIL, won’t be there to fight him with the other dragon slayers. Uh-uh fuck no.

And that massage on the last page, that’s a classic marker that he’s not gone.


My my! What and absolutely puzzling way to put it. I’m baffled. Let me think.. aaa…  I would say… Absolutely fuckin’ not - no they have not been lost for all eternity, because there’s absolutely no fuckin’ way. There just isn’t. Not possible. Not in this manner. Not with these circumstances in place. No.

Like maybe, maaaaybe, there could have been a chance in hell I could believe this if that message on the last page wasn’t there, but just putting it as a question makes it obvious for me the answer to it is “NO”.

Like, to me, he’s probably just, I don’t know, run off to get flowers for Lucy and propose to her for them to be together forever and ever and ever and ever (I’m spinning)… or smelled Acno coming and went to fight him. Something like that.

I any case I definitely expect to see him back next chapter, or say.. in two chapters, if Mashima intends to troll us some more; but I won’t believe he’s actually gone unless the manga ends without him doing so.

EDIT: Oh and I forgot about Zeref’s locket.

Ugh, come one, it’s obviously there for Natsu to find and have a memento of his big bro, a reminder that he wasn’t always so terrible. It’s like.. there’s just so many things that point to Natsu not being gone. 

I am definitely not in denial, he’s just definitely not gone and will come back some time in the next chapter or after 2-3 chapters. He’s gonna be there for the end chapter and end panel of Fairy Tail. As I said, I won’t believe he’s gone until he’s missing from those.

Because fuck it if Natsu actually stays gone I will never be able to read or watch Fairy Tail ever again and goddamn it that’s just too fuckin’ sad to even think about. I don’t want to live in a future where I won’t be re-watching/re-reading Fairy Tail, that would be too sad - and boring tbh. So Natsu is not gone, period.


Supercorp Appreciation Week

Day 3 (April 26): Favorite Scene or Episode. How many days am I late? Three? Whoops

Ayyy So I got a lot of supercorp feelings about 2x18 Ace Reporter. I mean, just look at those beautiful pictures. But something that really got me about this episode? We got to see Kara’s feelings in full damn force. And while I’m only going to focus on the supercorp aspect of this, I do feel like we got a little bit of our Kara back this episode (the headstrong, I’m a reporter and will fight for truth, protective season 1 Kara). I get this feeling about a lot of Lena episodes: that we’re not only getting Lena back, but our Kara too.

Remember how almost the entirety of the fandom believed it was the lovely Katie McGrath who went all out in her scenes to make them gay and Melissa was following her lead? Only for it to be revealed that it was that enigmatic Melissa who knew about it all along and told Katie about it?

I felt a similar shift in this episode. Because I’ve seen it everywhere that “Lena knows she has feelings for Kara and Kara does too but she’s in denial”. But guess what? After watching this episode, I am positive Kara knows.

I want to do this picture by picture. The number relates to the picture. Read more because this got hella long.

Keep reading

November 3, 1906: Alois Alzheimer presents a novel kind of early-onset dementia

110 years ago, on November 3, 1906, German psychiatrist Alois Alzheimer reports for the first time before a congress in Tübingen about a novel kind of early-onset dementia accompanied with massive loss of cerebral matter, deposition of amyloid plaques and occureence of neurofibrillar tangles in the cortex.

In 1901, Alzheimer was introduced to a 51 year-old patient of the Frankfurt mental asylum called Auguste Deter.

She had been taken there by her husband after she had shown disastrous changes in her personality and had become unable to lead the household over the course of only one year. Alzheimer recorded the first interrogation with Auguste Deter as followed:

Alzheimer: „What is your name?“
Deter: „Auguste.“
Alzheimer: „Family name?“
Deter: „Auguste.“
Alzheimer: „What’s the name of your husband?“
Deter (hesitant): „I believe… Auguste.“
Alzheimer „Your husband?“
Deter: „Oh, I see.“
Alzheimer: „How old are you?“
Deter: „51.“
Alzheimer: „Where do you live?“
Deter: „Oh, you have been visiting us before.“
Alzheimer „Are you married?“
Deter: „Oh, I am so confused.“
Alzheimer: „Where are you here?“
Deter: „Here and everywhere, here and now, you must not take offense.“
Alzheimer: „Where are you here?“
Deter: „We will be going to live here.“
Alzheimer: „Where is your bed?“
Deter: „Where might it be?“
Alzheimer: „Write down number five.”
Deter: *writes down ‘a woman’*
Alzheimer: „Write down number eight.”
Deter (while writing down ‘Auguste’): „I have lost myself, so to speak.”

It was obvious that Auguste Deter was very well aware of her helplessness and very distressed about it, with her mood rapidly changing between anxiety, weepiness, mistrust and denial. Alzheimer became highly interested in this case as she was only 51 years old, much younger than most patients with dementia. He refused to give her away to another asylum, even after he had moved from Frankfurt to Munich, and even though she became aggressive against the other resident patients. In his notes, Alzheimer called her condition the “disease of forgetting”.

On April 9, 1906, Alzheimer was informed that Auguste Deter had died from a sepsis, untreatable in the days before antibiotics. In the final stages of her disease, she was unable to walk and bound to bed, where she developed decubitus, which became infected. Alzheimer had her brain sent to Munich and investigated it microscopically with the help of two Italian physicians, using state-of-the-art staining techniques. These investigations were the foundation of the characterization of Auguste Deter’s condition as a newly discovered disease. His initial talk in Tübingen, however, left the audience unimpressed, and he was sent away without further discussion, questions or comments. Two papers describing the condition and the associated pathological histology were published soon, and in 1910, Alzheimer’s boss, Emil Kraepelin referred to the syndrome as “Alzheimer’s disease” in a book chapter, a name that remained.

Alzheimer died in 1915 from complications of what probably was a streptococcus infection in 1912, causing heart, kidney, and rheumatic conditions. Due to his short life, he was never able to discuss his findings with a broad scientific community.

In the early 1990s, medical researchers began doubting whether Alzheimer’s observations matched with today’s diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease. Through lucky circumstances, Alzheimer’s notes and his original microscopic slides were found in 1997 in an extremely well-preserved state, so that all doubts could be removed.

anonymous asked:

I think the phrasing was very deliberate, when he said "the baby". The way he had to build himself up to say ANYTHING broke my heart, but it was a very deliberate way of saying what he said. I'm feeling pretty optimistic at the moment, I think now they've established that theres a "real baby" we're very very very close to either news of a custody battle, judge ordering a pap test & a denial or more D & B drama ending in a denial. Either way, we know where this is going. What are your thoughts?

I think you’ve said just about everything I would have said. like you’ve said, we know exactly where this is going. Harvey’s closing line in the live TMZ segment really proved once and for all (at least to me) where they are absolutely heading, with a later reveal of everything was fake (probably after a CO happens).

I try to temper my sympathy/pity for Louis with the knowledge that he knew this was all coming and I am pretty sure had a say in his own fate, which I would think helps quite a bit. if I was him, part of what would make me crazy with the situation pre-NT would be the ultimate powerlessness. here, he’s not only had input into the plan, it’s possible he’s helped to design it. a huge difference.

Thoughts on the TWD/TTD finale (at least regarding Beth)

I know. I know. I’ve even said before, the show is not all about Beth, nor Bethyl.

I think most of us realize that and accept it, but it’s still hard to remember when we’ve been starved for answers for so long.

The thing is, we really do need to remember that there’s more to the show and the fandom at large than us Beth fans. We are the minority - by a long shot - which makes watching the show very difficult sometimes. They toss us these little easter eggs to get our hopes (or keep our hopes) up, but to a NBF (non-beth fan) they just fly by on the screen without a second thought. The music box, the blonde walkers, the people surviving head wounds on the show and the comics - they’re all just coincidences to the average, everyday, casual viewer. To us “Bethlievers,” however, they’re pure gold, and feed us just enough to keep us hoping. Hoping for answers, for resolution, for closure - hoping that TPTB will give us SOMETHING! We might relate everything to Beth, but we have to keep in mind that not every little thing is a direct link to her, as much as we’d like it to be.

The finale last night was, I thought, very good. It brought some long-standing issues to a close, but left enough to get viewers looking forward to Season 6 in the fall. No, we didn’t get the answers we as Beth fans were looking for - we’ve been given nothing but those easter eggs for any indication that Beth is still alive or if she is, in fact, dead. I’m not giving up. I’ve got new lawn chairs ordered for my hut on Denial Isle and am tempted to hire a cabana boy to keep my margarita glass full at all times. Beth is alive, and some of the things I saw last night only cemented that idea as a fact in my brain.

The episode itself (in no particular order) -

  • Aaron again recognizing that Daryl sees the good in people. I was just WAITING for Daryl to say something about how he had learned from Beth that not everyone is bad, that it was because of her that he’s the man he is today. That teeny tiny grin told me he was thinking it. 
  • Tara finally waking up after receiving a massive head wound after everyone on that run thinking she was a goner. Notice it took her three days to recover. (Imagine how long it would take to recover from a gunshot wound to the head…)
  • The music box up and working again, and Judith was absolutely entranced by it.
  • Morgan saying “Everything gets a return,” not once, but twice. Even his attempt at convincing those two Wolves to just leave him alone, trying to make peace with someone before just jumping to fighting…just reminded me of Beth.
  • The whole Team Family (except for Carol threatening to kill Pete) was showing how GOOD they were - Glenn sparing Nicholas (douche canoe)’s life; Abraham and Eugene apologizing for everything that went down between them; Rick admitting he’d screwed up; Sasha seeking the good in Father Gabriel. In a way, even Gabriel finally stepping up made me think of Beth, even though he’d never met her. He finally took care of himself when the walker with the noose came after him, then took mercy on the half-eaten man in the road and killed him before he could suffer anymore or turn into a walker. (Hmm…Gabriel was basically suicidal, then decided he wanted to live after all…interesting…)

I’m sure there’s more, but without re-watching the whole episode, that’s what comes to mind. Perhaps one day I’ll do an addendum, but today is not that day.

The Talking Dead

  • I was pissed, as I’m sure most of us are, that Gimple took himself off the couch. “Everyone just wants to talk to the cast members anyway.” Horse shit. He’s probably the one most of the questions were for, asking, begging, demanding answers for how things went down this season, but what could he say? “Sorry, I can’t answer that?” If he kept saying that to all the questions, especially questions regarding Beth, it would be obvious that he’s covering something up. Or (remembering that we’re the minority) lie to the camera and say, “Sorry, Beth’s not coming back.” And then if/when she DOES come back next season, he gets a boat load more hate from the rest of the fandom for lying (see how it feels, jerks?) Like I said, I was super pissed that he wasn’t there to answer questions, but I get why he did it.
  • Something Lennie said made me just fall in love with him (aside from his accent…good lord…complete non-sequitur, but british/australian/irish accents just do it for me). Chris Hardwick had asked him what had changed Morgan from being “cray cray” (as Lennie called it) to this almost zen-like “all life is beautiful” state that he’s in now. Lennie said that something had happened to him to get him to change his way of thinking. Gee…who does that sound like? Isn’t that EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN BETH AND DARYL? She showed him there were still good in people, and even taught him how to see it just as he was teaching her how to track and hunt. Is it possible that Morgan found his way to Grady and had met Beth before making his way toward Washington, DC? You bet your sweet bippy it’s possible.
  • I found it very strange that there were NO questions about Beth. I mean, I know we make up a small percentage of the fandom as Beth/Bethyl fans, but I thought at least SOMEONE would get through with a “Where was Beth’s funeral?” or “Why didn’t we see what happened to Beth’s body?” or SOMETHING. The questions are undoubtedly screened, and TPTB are very good at keeping things secret when they want them to be.

Other thingie-things

  • The AMC Walking Dead Character Bio page STILL hasn’t been updated. It looks like they haven’t updated at all since the beginning of Season 5. Some may argue that they’re just lazy, but a huge draw like Walking Dead, ranked the most popular show on television, and the website coordinator is just taking his time getting around to it, but has the time to update all the other shows, and post pictures and videos…not to mention all the social media? They’ve already got a page up for Fear the Walking Dead, but they can’t update their flagship show’s page? I don’t buy it. I truly believe that they realized they can’t update. If they did, and posted that Bob and Tyreese had been killed, but that Beth had just been shot, that would give away that she hadn’t died. If they only update the guys and not hers, same outcome. We’ll see what happens now that the season is over, but I suspect they’re holding out until Beth is revealed as being alive.
  • And speaking of social media, they certainly like putting Beth’s beautiful face up in their posts, don’t they? She gets an awful lot of screen time for “just another dead girl.” Andrea and Lori certainly didn’t get this kind of attention.
  • Noah isn’t even listed as one of the characters on the AMC site. They just…forgot to add him? No. They couldn’t add him, because why would they update that part of the page and not scroll up and say, “by the way Tyreese and Bob are dead, too”  Because they’d still have to leave Beth’s bio the way it is?
  • Even the episode recap for Coda just says that she was shot, that they cried over her body, but not that she was dead.
  • Why would Nicotero make such a big point on TTD  that seventeen days had passed between Coda and WHAWGO? Why is that significant when the very next episode, Rick states that it’s been three weeks since Atlanta. What’s the difference in those four days?
  • Norman was eerily silent last night on social media. Usually we at least get a “it’s sunday night let’s do this” type of tweet from him. Granted he’s a busy guy, but the fact that he usually tweets from TTD greenroom or in the car ride over to the studio and last night he didn’t post anything regarding the show makes me wonder…
  • Those clips from WHAWGO that never came to fruition. Especially:
  1. Daryl, Glenn, Abraham and Rick running through the city street. Daryl had been carrying Beth - why the hell would he put her down…UNLESS they realized she wasn’t dead and had to leave her. 
  2. That blurry image of someone swaying back and forth on the left side of the screen (Maggie? Glenn?)

There’s a whole lot of questions and clues that have me firmly embedded in the trenches of team delusional, team wtf, team logic, denial isle. I just find it hard to believe that a show that has done such brilliant writing as to set up Beth’s character would all of a sudden drop the ball like they did. Hardwick read a message from Gimple last night where he restated that they basically reinvent the show every eight episodes. They’ll use different tactics and plot devices to keep the viewers engaged and still do the story justice. I wonder what changes will come next season.

As we embark on this hiatus, I am still incredibly hopeful. I certainly feel a lot better about the way this season ended than I did last season. I just ask everyone to keep in mind that:

1) this is Rick’s story…Rick and Carl’s to be more correct. Most action and development are going to center around those two. Yes, we’ll get scenes of other characters throughout the episodes, but if we don’t see Beth or get any indication that she’s still alive, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s really gone.

2) Remember - Merle was gone for a season and a half…Beth’s been gone half a season. She’s got to recover/wake up from her head wound, then, possibly, go through some kind of physical therapy to get herself moving again.

3) On top of that, she has no idea where the rest of her family went, so it might take her a while to get up to ASZ. (or, take a while for someone to find her still alive and well at Grady, as I theorized in this post).

Wow…this got REALLY long. Sorry about that. Basically, don’t give up on our girl. Whenever you start freaking out and getting all worried, know that my ask is always open and I am eager to talk to anyone any time.

anonymous asked:

The fact that you blocked 342 antis sounds a lot to me like "I'm so terrified of hearing counterevidence that could disprove everything I've clung on to so long and become so emotionally invested in that I'm going to stick my fingers in my ears, la la la la la! The earth is flat!"

No honey it means there are 300 who hijacked my posts or reblogged posts where i was bullied and 42 who have freddies, anti larrie or whatever URL’s. 

I am not the one living in denial. 

I want to support Harry and Louis without being bullied. Me blocking those blogs means exactly that: I don’t want to hear about them, I don’t want to know about them and yes i do not want those assholes to hijack my posts.